Do your kids have rights at school?

Any child that’s having issues with their body no matter if it just small or bigger issues the school has no right to deny any communication from their parents, ---- idc how school rules work , that’s YOUR child NOT theirs ,

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If she has a phone next time tell her to go to the bathroom to call you. If she doesn’t have her go to the guidance counselor or nurse if medical. I understand schools not letting kids call home for every little thing, but if it’s important to her the guidance counselor prob would allow it. Or meet with the principal and address your concerns

WTF? My kids teacher texts me when something is up.

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My child can and will call me or have someone call me for any issue he feels the need to include me for.

Tell your daughter to tell the teacher they are going to the nurses office. No child should have to ask to see the nurse, give her permission to walk out of class if she needs to. Once in the office she can tell the nurse as little or as much as she needs and the call can be made from there. Everyone is entitled to bodily autonomy anyone saying otherwise is wrong.

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Maybe she is not ready for a bra. :face_with_raised_eyebrow: and yea, using the phone at school is not a right.

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Tell her to take her phone and call you or go to the school nurse .I am sure the school nurse will give you a call

If unwell or emergency yes. But having clothing fit issues? No.
Send spares

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We always asked to go to the nurse or the office if we needed to call home

Some teachers are jerks . Tell her next time ask to see the nurse . Tell her teacher her stomach hurts . Tell the nurse the truth last time she told her teacher she needed her moms help she refused

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So my sons school only gives 2 phone passes a month to each student (non emergency). And more times then not my sons teacher will message me first on our class app. that emmet is having issues with xyz do you want me to have him call you. Now sometimes I say sure, but most of the time what he wants can wait and I definitely tell her no just tell him we will talk after school.

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I look at it several different ways.

  1. Your child is uncomfortable and not able to focus so school. Work isn’t being done to her best ability. So teacher should let her call.
  2. It’s her body and she’s uncomfortable she should be able to make a call so she can be comfortable.
  3. If a child wants to talk to their parent for any reason a child should not be denied.
  4. I would go to the principal and explain that this was not okay.
  5. Anyone who thinks an 8 year old should suffer all day in a uncomfortable bra and still focus on school. I honestly hope your bra is twisted tomorrow when your at work in an important meeting and you get a wedgie you can’t fix and then think about how nice it would be able to fix though things and then imagine what an 8 year old would feel like
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Simple get her a phone and tell her to call you from the toilets or at break time

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I think empathy goes a long way and teachers should model that to children. These comments make me sad. What seems small to us, could make a big difference in a child’s day positively or negatively. When a child tells an adult about a problem, they deserve to feel heard… no matter how small it is. If children don’t see us at least attempt to fix “small” problems, how can we expect them to trust us when big ones come up?

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I’ve always told my kids, that if they ever need me for something, to call and if the teachers deny it, then to demand the teachers call me and I’ll let them know what’s up.
I’ve also told my kids that NO ONE will deny them to use the bathroom. If they’ve asked nicely, and a teacher/whoever says no, that they get up and go anyways… and if there’s any problems that the school will be hearing A LOT from me.

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Teachers have rules that must be followed.

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I think it depends on the school, but in general, allowing every child to call their parents whenever they want to could get a little chaotic. That would be allowing students to leave their desks/tables/rooms, on a whim, which is likely to cause a disruption if it’s only one kid…imagine if it were a class full? No learning would be happening. Perhaps during breaks in instruction, or during lunch or recess time it should be permitted, but a free-for-all wouldn’t be good for anyone.

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I think it goes both ways, I don’t think the teacher should have to allow phones, however if someone is having issues with clothing, hygiene, etc. then yeah, sent them to the office to call their parents. Teachers interrupt kids class time all the time over dress code, so what’s the issue with sending them to the office to call to get a new set of clothes? Y’all are pathetic.

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My daughter has a phone so she can call or text me if need be but the school usually will call me if the need arises. Just like the other day she was standing on her desk and it flipped and she landed forehead first and blacked out for a quick second. I got a call from the nurse almost immediately. She informed me on what happened and that she thought she was ok other than a knot on her head and a pounding headache. A bit later my daughter texted me and asked that I come get her so I did

And they wònder why kíds drop òut. Schòols are dísgùsting now days and honestly they’re üseless

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I have so many thoughts:

If a kid needs a phone call to their momma they should have that, I know good and well as a full grown woman I certainly wouldn’t want to tell my boss if I was having personal issues: a little girl shouldn’t have to openly admit to her teacher that she is having bra issues in order to call her mom.

If I was having a bladder infection ect. I would absolutely not tell my boss or my professor before walking out of class and making a phone call. So the least a teacher can do is let a student go to the office or the nurse.

Imagine if you had to tell your boss the reason you needed to make a phone call to your dr ? That’s be so weird.
Im not saying interrupt class every day but if it’s that important a kid will still want to call at lunch time or be willing to go to the office to do it.

Tell her to say she needs to see the nurse…the nurse will let her call

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Yes. My son was able to call me from day 1 of school and he is a senior now

I don’t know about other phone carriers but T-Mobile has what they call a “kids watch” they can call/message up to 5 people. It looks like a Apple Watch. My daughter is kindergarten and I got her one for emergencies.

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I always just went to the nurses office, the nurse would let me call home.

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Id be up at the school in full karen mode if they denied my child communication with me!

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I’m having trouble getting past the 8 year old and bra part? I think the answer to your question depends on where you live. I have personally found that rural areas are much less strict on kids calling home.

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Maybe it depends on the school my son can call me for any reason. Maybe go talk to the school

One of the reasons my daughter has a phone. She can always go to the restroom and text/call me

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You have how many kids in a class, in that grade, in that school? If each one wanted to call home that would be a nightmare. It’s the teacher’s call. They have enough on their plate

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In elementary school we could call whenever. Sometimes we just had to wait for a few minutes or go down to the nurse first.

Middle school, most of us had phones by then. So it was mainly just having to wait until the end of a lesson/class.

HS, that was another story. I never had any issue just up and walking out of class to call my mom if needed. However, I learned the hard way that public schools do not acknowledge restraining orders :woman_facepalming:

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I got my youngest a gizmo watch so he can go to the bathroom and call or text if he needs me.

My daughter has never had a problem walking out of class to go to guidance counselor or to call me. I’d have a fit if she had a problem and was denied to leave class or to call me. :disappointed_relieved::sob:

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Just my opinion, but maybe you should’ve come up with another example.

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That’s pretty normal. There are some kids who would only ask in an emergency, but others who would ask 3 times a day. If it’s important enough to call, then they should be able to explain to a teacher or ask to see the nurse.

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My kids have to give a little bit of detail only so they know that it is a legit reason… kids had been taking advantage of calling home when they didn’t have to give an actual reason… so our school just wants to know there is a reason for the call

They have to moderate it otherwise kids would be calling for everything. Calling about a wardrobe issue isn’t an emergency so I wouldn’t consider raising a fuss over that.

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I had it in a couple of my kids’ IEPs that they could call home when frustrated. They would call me, we would talk about what was happening. I would ask if they could finish the day and if not I’d pick them up. Rarely did I have to get them. Just knowing they could call helped them not get in trouble.

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I would make it clear if my daughter wants to get a hold of me u better let her. We had an issue once and they didn’t let her. Never happened again when we made it clear to not keep our daughter from contacting us

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I got our 2nd grader a cell he keeps in his backpack in case of emergencies. Has only me, papa, and his aunt in there.

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I’d be heading over to talk with the teacher and principal. Now this kid knows her teacher is not a trusted person who can help her.

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My daughter goes to the nurse to call when she needs.

As a teacher, no, without a legit reason, they can’t call. Your daughter needs to tell the teacher what the issue is.

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Honestly, you should be able to call home from school when you need to. Who cares about the rules lol.
I was always able to call home from school. No teacher ever denied me that.

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Just talk to the teacher and tell the teacher you want your child to be able to call when she asks to call since your daughter is a private person and that she doesn’t want to discuss why she needs to call mom. And when she asks just to let her.

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I always tell my kid. If she has an emergency and they tell her she can’t leave the room… She has my permission. It’s school, not jail. And just because they’re younger than us, doesn’t mean they shouldn’t have the same choices and rights (for the most part) as us?
Like esp with the bathroom. So many kids having accidents because they’re told they can’t go. I say… Go! Do what your gut is telling you. If my daughter needs to call me, she has her cell and if it’s urgent she can call me. Bottom line.

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They should know why the child needs to call home and other than an emergency, which the school will already be making that call, there’s no reason why a child should request to call home. I’m sure her friend could helped her

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I would talk to the teacher! Because yes they have rights! My son has low bladder control and has to use the bathroom more often. I always told him to ask for permission but if it gets too bad then to just leave! And if there’s a problem the school cal call me!I’m not about to have him humiliated in that way!

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As a K-8 teacher for 30 years, I know there is always a plan for kids to go in an emergency or a private matter either to the principal, the nurse, or the counselor, depending on what the school has for staff. Though so many would have you believe otherwise, we really love kids and understand (maybe better than most!) that they are little humans who sometimes need a little special, private care. There are those kids who will abuse this and say “I need to go to the nurse” more than they truly need to do, but the nurse (or whoever is the support person) will catch that and will have a discussion with the child to put a stop to it.
And by the way, if a call to Mom or Dad is in order, that support person will see to it. The teacher in the classroom has a roomful of kids; that decision has to sit elsewhere.

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I would let your child know to ask to go to the nurse next time. As long as your child isn’t abusing the privilege of leaving the classroom, I don’t see a problem with it.

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I’m
Sorry but a bra strap is not an emergency… Jesus… seriously people!!! Now if she had a nose bleed and it wouldn’t stop. If she had started her period… and bled through her clothes… or needed tampons… those are real reasons… I’m sorry… but this is a petty reason to be upset.

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Thats not an emergency nor something that should be classed as needing to call for, if it was something more like her first period then I’d understand but it’s hardly a need to call over a wardrobe malfunction

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She should have asked to go to the nurse and then ask nurse or office to call home . Calling about a bra isn’t an emergency and can wait but the nurse would have helped her . Maybe oy have her wear sports bras

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Start buying different bras like sports type bras where straps aren’t going to be as annoying lol

And if our kids have accidents and we can’t get a hold of parents our school has extra clothes at hand.

If anyone ever denied my child a call to me I would suggest that person runs far and fast and never comes back.

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I can’t stand teachers like that

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For those saying it’s “not an emergency” what if it was digging in her side? Causing her to be distracted from her work? What if it broke causing her nipple to be exposed through her shirt.

We worry about our kids NOT reaching out to us but when they want to some of you wanna turn your shoulder?

My son has his own cell phone and if he ever needs me i told him yo ask his teacher if she says no he is to go to the bathroom and call me and if they say no to the bathroom he is to pull his phone out and call me and I’ll come right up to the school.

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Y’all are missing the point. Who cares if it wasn’t an emergency!? She wanted to call her mom, she should have been able to.

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The ones saying oh its just a bra myst not had big boobs at a young age like me and my daughter. OP never said what happened with the bra, it could have broken. If mine or my teenage daughter would have had that happen, hell yes that’s a need to call home for a replacement because it’d be an embarrassment to go without at our size.

Why would any of you mommas say a bra strap isn’t important? I mean I get it it’s not at the top of a priority list but the little girl is 8 y’all don’t know how big her breast really are to know of it would actually be an emergency or not…. I had double d’s at the age of 10 and do you know how embarrassing it is to have to ask for help over a bra issue at that young of age? I also have a niece that can’t wear but one type of undergarments and she has a social mutism disorder… so tell me exactly how does any of this or anything at all give any of you the right to justify what an emergency is ?

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My kids are allowed to call . If not they have an cell phone

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I would be pissed and let them know my Boys will be able to call me whenever they feel the need! I do not care what the schools think is appropriate for when they can call me or not. Both my boys have a way to call me on their person my youngest has the Gizmo Watch and my oldest has a phone. They have been told they can call me whenever! If I teacher denies my boys calling me they hear from me right away! I do not play when it comes to my boys and I will not allow them to dictate my Boys to a certain level! I am THAT mom and I have no shame about it at all!

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I feel like my child could call me for anything. We love our school cooperation

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These schools are concentration camps nowadays. Let’s not forget we pay taxes to get these places up and running, the school board is so desensitized and if a problem arises with an individual they have to play by the numbers

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Sounds like a dotting mother to me.help the kid grow up by figuring things out on their own ( within reason of course )

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And THIS BS is just another reason why I chose to homeschool my son after a yr in public school. Sorry but these teachers and the schools don’t care about your kids!

Rebecca Rose Manning “Hey, Can I use the phone, please?” …June Harvey, Please. Hey Mom. Can you bring pizza home tonight? I miss you so much. I love you. I’ll call you back in half an hour. I love you…hey mom…I miss you. Maybe some sour cream and onion chips too. I only have two full bags. I love you. Okay. I’ll call you back soon. Love you Mama. I love you…bye…Hey Mom…don’t forget the garlic sauce. Okay. Love you. Bye Mama"

Get her one of those kids gps/ phone watches so in an emergency or when she needs you she can go to the bathroom and call you

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No, they aren’t. That’s why my child has a cell phone. Rules with that are, the kids can’t have them in class. Recess and such, they can’t say no because it’s the child’s time, not theirs.

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If my kids had this rule in school they’d have a cell phone

All ya’ll with the crap attitude of “this isn’t an emergency” are exactly the reasons that in impoverished areas like mine these teachers are getting away with crazy excessive BS and even when parents do voice concerns(which isn’t as often as it would be in a better area) they are blown off pretty much completely​:face_with_symbols_over_mouth: My daughters K teacher left a class full of 4 and 5 yo kids alone on Valentine’s day and my daughter was pushed during that time with no adult present, knocked down and hit her head on the way down​:rage: They didn’t even call me!!! When my daughter came home and showed us her lump on her head and told us the story i lost my mind​:face_with_symbols_over_mouth::face_with_symbols_over_mouth::face_with_symbols_over_mouth: They dgaf and any concerns I’ve voiced this year are met with similar attitude of “we do what we can with what we’ve got” and idgaf, absolutely not! If my kid asks to call home then she is to call home and the school doesn’t even need to be informed of why​:100::100::100::woman_shrugging: I’ll determine if it’s appropriate or not and I’ll handle teaching my daughter for next time if it’s not. WE ALL PARENT DIFFERENTLY BUT EVERY PARENTING STYLE IS VALID!!! So no, no teacher or aid or anyone else should be determining if and when my child has an issue or whatever the case may be​:100: Maybe to you all it’s not a big deal but you have no idea what’s behind it. Maybe she’s struggling with young puberty! They have no right at all to deny our children to do the very things we are telling them they should. Idc we can argue but this mentality is exactly why lower class kids slip through the cracks every single minute of every single day and it’s bs

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Yep they can. If she’d waited for interval maybe it would’ve had a different outcome.

When I was in school, I quit asking to call home if I needed something and I just called/texted my parents with my phone.

I would be scheduling a meeting with the teacher quick. If that didn’t help, go up the chain of command.
If need be, I would be at the next school board meeting. My kid will always know he can call me and will always have access to me!

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Letting children call home is a huge issue I have fought and fought about at my kids elementary school. They should be free to do so! Elementary school feels like sending children I to prison lately. Communication inside is unreliable, children are ignored, ipoc is ignored or not even communicated, it’s stressful. What harm could have come from.a child calling her mom to help with a situation with her bra, sheesh. I’m sorry she couldn’t call.

Tell your daughter from now on to ask to go to the nurse… she’s not feeling good, they can’t deny they to go see the nurse (right??) and then go from there…

She should’ve ask to go to the nurse. The nurse would call home.

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There was no phones when we went to School. Very many homes didn’t have phones. You made do until you got home.there was no cell phones.

I remember in school we had a tornado hit near our school. I have anxiety through the rough about it. We were in the girls locker room under benches and I snuck and tried to call my mom. My teacher tool my phone

I agree the teachers (most) and schools don’t care about the kids needs. In second grade both my children had the same teacher and I had to take each of them a change of clothes at least once. The second year with her after causing my daughter to wet in class after my son had dealt with the same issue the previous year. I went to the school board. That teacher is no longer there.

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I’ve always told my children if you need to go to the bathroom, get water, or need me and are denied. Simply and respectful get up , tell the teacher and walk yourself to the office.

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Tell her to ask to go to the nurse and then the nurse will call you.

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This is NOT okay. You have every right to be upset.

I taught in public school for 12 years in a very good system. But I absolutely abhor the way children are treated. They still have rights but are treated more like prisoners. That’s why when I had my daughter, I decided to homeschool her.

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I’m gonna tell you right now I would have flew off the handle. My daughter is very emotional and sensitive so when she has bad days me and the teacher try our best to help her turn it around

Imagine if kids knew they could call home at school. Teachers would never get any teaching done. For an issue like this I’d have told my child to go straight to the office or school nurse.

Should they??? Yes. Do they? No. And unfortunately, it turns you into “that parent” when you stand up for your child. My oldest had bladder issues and needed to go more often than usual. The school, the nurse and teacher were made aware. She was still denied and told she needed better time management skills (she was in 3rd grade and it didn’t matter because she used to restroom at recess as instructed, needed to go again). She ended up having an accident and was forced to sit in it for the last hour and a half of school. I VERY quickly became “that parent” and demanded that teacher be reprimanded but also apologize privately to my daughter. It NEVER happened again. When you’re known as “that parent”, it’s amazing how many more rights your child suddenly has. I have NO shame either. The "Mama Bear"is far more than cute t shirts.

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My son knows he’s allowed to call me for what ever he needs rather the school likes it or not if he needs me I’m gonna be there period. We had past issues with the school not informing me of him being bullied and hurt by another child.

my daughter’s have had phones since they were in school… teachers didn’t want to hear them go off & they couldn’t be out & using during tests

that’s why my kids, even though are little, have their own phones. I’d definitely say something to the teacher

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Idk my daughter is in 1st grade and her teacher texts or calls me all the time. My daughter has anxiety and some days are hard on her. Her teacher will call me or my husband to help my daughter. Maybe it’s a school thing but could also be a teacher thing. Either way I’m grateful her teacher reaches out like she does

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In the elementary school district where my kids went to school… no. Thankfully or they’d of been calling me all day long. Now, when I taught in the same district as a middle school teacher, I did allow my students to call home at lunch or during a free period, etc but not in the middle of class so the entire class was disrupted.
My kids are in high school now (and college) and they have their phones on them and text me all day long.

My daughter in 5th grade had pneumonia during Christmas break and the week after it was bad…finally day to go to school and Doctors note said NO PE! Well her teacher knew more than the doc…when she came to the car I knew she was sick again! Took her to the doctor and he was afraid she would end up with asthma and she did…I was livid when she told me she asked to call me and was told no! I went that day and got her a phone…told her to keep it off and in her backpack and if she ever needed to call me I would handle the principle…then I went and told the principal the same thing…Dr then told me to keep her home for a few more days…til I felt she was ready and he would write the note! She never needed the phone to call me but we knew she could!

Yeah that’s not okay at all!!!

Just like if they have bathroom issues… They won’t let them go! Let my child get a bladder infection… There’s gonna be consequences

I would first go to school district office and have THEM print out a copy of that specific policy for their district schools! I imagine they vary depending on state, district, countries, etc… then I would set up meeting with teacher and principal to go over that policy together and find a compromise that works for all of you.
Calling home, can be disruptive, it wasn’t an emergency, some teachers just don’t care, some teachers are uninformed of such policies, some parents think their kids are kings and deserve special treatment, etc… lots of variables on every side!
I can completely understand your side and theirs. I have special needs child and I volunteered at schools for over 7 years now. So I see both sides. But having the solid outline in your hand before going to school is always best for you as the parent. I’m sure you can access this info online, but it would be more powerful if they hand it to you personally! It also makes a statement that you’re there for your child and willing to go to bat for them if something happens~ that really does hold weight within the politics of school.
If all these things don’t work and it happens again, I’d change schools. Easier said then done, but in the end, what’s best for your family and child’s future is worth the hassle.
I hope you get it figured out and I wish you the best!

(I see a lot suggesting going to nurse, but not all schools have nurses. Ours has ONE that travels within several schools in district. We’re rural so some schools are an hour apart one way!)

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Are they in school to learn or to call home. Phones should be put in a safe place or turned off during class, she can call home at recess-- or learn to home school your child. Back in the olden days the girl would ask her best friend to help her.

Wearing a bra at 8? Oh, dear. Usually they get sent to nurse for personal issues and nurse decides whether a parental call is warranted.

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When I was in high school a teacher refused to let me go to the restroom & refused to let a friend give me a pad from her locker when my period randomly showed up & I ended up bleeding through my pants. I walked out of the class & went to the principals office & he looked mortified & let me call my mom for some clothes & my mom raised living hell with that teacher when she got there. If I ever find out my kids have a similar situation I will do the same.

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My kids school wouldn’t dream of denying them access to me. That would be all kinds of trouble to them. Starting with a visit to the school to see the teacher, the principal and the board if I have to.

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