He still is the dad❤
Nope, he doesnt need to be at the birth.
I would talk to the hospital about having both in there. Explain the situation see if it can be approved
He has a right to be there but you have a right to say no and you want your mom there and he can be in the visiting area and come in after baby is born.
You don’t need any added stress. Tell him no. He can wait outside if he wants.
Ultimately this is your decision. If he isn’t in the room that doesn’t make him any less of a father and he can still sign the birth certificate the next day when they bring it to you. If you feel he will support you during this delivery and you need him to be with you while your body goes through immense changes and “struggle” (it won’t be horrific it’s just a lot of in the moment pain) then I would say ask him. But your mom will be a great choice too if you don’t feel he will be able to be there with you to support you and talk you through the pain and help you. The baby comes after delivery this is all about you at this point. what is your comfort zone, your tolerance, your choice.
Nope. Your birth is your choice. Period. In the hospital? Absolutely. Able to hold the baby soon after birth as long as there’s no medical emergency? Of course. In the room? Nope. His wants don’t trump your needs.
You get to choose, obviously.
However, that being said, you are being petty and unfair.
This is his child also.
You said you think he will be a good father.
You said he was not a bad person, just that you’re not good together.
You said he respected your decision about breaking up and keeping a distance.
It sounds like you wanted him to him to keep in touch and resent the fact that he gave you the space you seem to have wanted.
Why didn’t you reach out about accompanying you to doctor’s appointments?
He may have been waiting for an invitation so that he couldn’t be accused of stalking or harrassment.
He is not a mind reader.
He was good enough to create this child with but not good enough to be present at the birth of his child…??
I think you are being petty and mean.
I would invite him to witness the birth of his child.
No one has a RIGHT to your space. Not even the Dr’s and nurses. If you don’t like an RN or DR they’ll get you a new one. Even if you were married and it was your husband he has no rights to be there. It’s already stressful having a baby let alone mfkrs trying to force their way in.
Don’t take away that experience from him …totally wrong in so many ways
Take your mum you want your support person to be just that …… a great support for you, not someone you’ve broken up with
I mean if it isn’t a horrible person and you think he will be a good dad and he wants to be there and be there for the baby then I would let him be the one there. A father has just as right to see his baby being born and I can’t imagine how it would feel to miss his kid coming into this world. Yes you are the one in labor but baby belongs to both of you. I am a huge advocate for Fathers Rights so that might be some of why I feel that way. But I think it’s the truth.
Laboring and delivering a child is not a spectator sport. The other person in the delivery room is supposed to be there to support you. If you feel they are not up to that job, then choose someone else. Anyone else can see the baby after it’s out. They will have an entire lifetime of looking at the child.
If you don’t want him there, don’t let him in. He can see the baby after. I let my youngest daughter dad in and it made the whole experience uncomfortable because even though he was there he wasn’t supportive like my friends would have been. He was just kinda there
He does not have a right to be there. It’s your medical experience, you are in
No one has an actual right to be in the delivery room with you. It’s your choice and who will make you comfortable. You don’t need added stress while bringing your child into this world. You aren’t together and he wasn’t involved in the pregnancy. You can tell him that your mom will be your delivery coach and he can wait in the waiting room. When you give birth it is a very exposed and stressful time. Stick to your guns about your mom. She seems like she would be a better support system and being able to help talk you through all the emotions you are bound to have during delivery.
Not if u dont want him there no. Have your mum if thats what u want
This same thing happened with my daughter. He stayed in waiting room and I went in.
The person who is in the room with you is there for YOU. He doesn’t need to be there for the birth if it’s uncomfortable for you. I chose close family members to be there with me. He can wait outside of the delivery room.
Think of it this way- you are the one carrying the child. The people in the room are supposed to be in support of YOU as you labor. Yes it’s his child but if you do not feel emotionally/ mentally supported by him, honestly his presence in the room could add strain or stress on both you and the baby. He should be welcomed at the hospital but told to wait in the waiting room. Drs and nurses should honor your choice / birth plan. State it very clearly you are not together anymore and he is not the labor support person - your mother is. Hugs
No one has a right to be there. Its your choice and who brings you the best environment during a stressful time
You don’t need him in there if you don’t want him in there. You need to do what’s best for you bc that is one of the most sacred moments of your life and you need to just worry about yourself to make sure you are in the best state of mind possible. The doctors and nurses will follow your requests and make sure everything is how you want.
Your birth, your choice!
Your feelings are 100% valid and you don’t have to let him. Don’t even tell him when you’re in labor.
What makes you think he should have to miss the birth of his child?
Yes, I chose My Mother because only your Mother knows exactly what you’re feeling and how to comfort you, I was being petty but I don’t regret it we’ve gotten back together and I still don’t regret it, the pettiness yes but My Mother being there was the best choice what could he have done but let me cuss him out let me squish his hand no I needed my Mother to walk me through everything tell me I was gonna be alright just everything a Mother does
Now I see why so many men just walk away geeze it’s his child to and you can now have 2 people with you I think this is sad in so many ways its his child to so I can see many problems in coparenting here this is exactly why so many walk away and never have anything to do with their child smh grow up
if your feeling that your mum would be a better support person for you then go ahead i chose my sister to be support person and I wouldn’t change a thing about it. It doesn’t necessarily mean that you have hard feelings or want to be spiteful towards the dad, it’s you trying to give yourself a stress free and more comfortable birthing experience. Good luck mumma
If I was in that situation I’d want my mom. Men have no experience going through that. I wanted to kick my own husband out last time. He sat on his phone the whole time until it was time for me to push. He never did that with our others. I was more than upset to say the least! He almost got tossed out……… you want comfort in that time not stress.
No. The only people allowed are people you approve.
If you’re worried about him trying to crash; warn the hospital and don’t tell him when labour starts
Your birth your body you can have who ever you want
Just tell him u want your mother. It’s your body, your vagina, and your not together.
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Ultimately it’s your choice, but this is my opinion on the matter, I would let him be there. You chose to make a baby with him and carry the pregnancy to term. He wants to be a father and be there for birth. Not many women get that from men. I personally wouldn’t feel right denying him seeing his child’s birth. You yourself said that he will be a good dad and you guys just don’t work. My best advice is to try to form a friendship, it will make coparenting much better for your kid. At the end of the day, the choice is yours to make. No judgments.
You’re feelings are valid and I don’t think it’s being petty to want your mom. My kids dad was in the room for the first 2 along with a couple others (pre Covid) and he was not very supportive and did nothing to help me through it. We had broke up 4 months before my last was born (last year during covid) I could only have one person with me so it was my step mom that came with me. It was the smoothest delivery out of all 3 and he was my biggest. His dad was mad but he got over it. Pick who will make you the most comfortable it’s not about anyone but yourself and your baby. The more relaxed you are the smoother delivery goes.
You have the right to say who can and cannot be there. Plain and simple fact.
I wonder if the hospital would allow mom during labor to help you relax and the father in for the birth that way both can experience this joy without you being to stressed. If not go with your mom, you do not need to be stressed and tense during labor and delivery,can cause complications and health issues for mom and baby
I didnt have him there. Is up to you. My mom went. My kids dad would have tormented me/drs
Ummm don’t tell him until after the kid is born. whoops.
Your feelings are very valid! He does not have to be in the delivery room, period.
Your body
Your birth
Your decision.
Don’t let ANYone tell you otherwise
No I don’t think he does
I hope they allow 2 so he can be there. I’d hate to know he missed that joyous occasion just because you’re not together. if you were still together do you think you’d still feel the same way you do?
Most hospitals it is what the mother wants. You choose who is in the delivery room.
My thoughts are, If he hasn’t necessarily done anything wrong, why would you take this away from him? How would you feel if the roles were reversed and you weren’t allowed to be their for the birth of your child? How would that really make you feel? And then there’s people telling you not to even tell him that the baby was born! This guy has done nothing wrong per the post, she left him!
Your choice. Pick who YOU want.
You can choose whoever you want to be there. If you want your mom, then choose your mom. There’s nothing petty about wanting your parent with you. Whoever it is, should be your main support. You don’t want to be stressed out by a person while trying to give birth.
He can still be in the waiting room and wait to see the baby right after you deliver, that way he isn’t missing out on anything.
It’s your decision as to who is in the room with you.
Nope. My ex showed up at hospital the day I was being induced. He showed off and yelled at nurses saying he had a right to be there. The doctors and security banned him. Said only mom has a right in the delivery room.
It’s up to you who is in that room.
No. The birth is about you and your baby. You don’t even have to let him sign the birth certificate if he wasn’t there for you during the pregnancy.
If I were you I’d give the baby your last name. but let him have the chance to at least be in the babies life.

He does not have the right. Father or not, married or not. It is your choice always who you want in that room or if you want no one there.
Take your mother. It may be his child, but it is your birthing experience, you deserve someone who brings you comfort. The experience is not one you have to share with him, he will see the child directly after, that’s his experience. Don’t let anyone shame you for making that decision.
This is all about you and the baby. Mom us best choice.
For myself, I would let him in. you can only give birth to a child once. I wouldn’t want him to miss it regardless of the break up.
That being said, your feelings are 1000% valid and it’s truly up to you to have who you want in the room with you. Do what you’re comfortable with.
Check to see if they will allow you to have two people. He should be there but if you only get one person go with the person who will help keep you calm and supported. I just gave birth and had my mom and husband in the room. But if they only let one it would of been my mom. That support is necessary.
Like I get why you feel that way… but personally I think it’s pretty unfair… you’d probably be upset if roles were reversed and at the end of the day that’s also HIS child.
but each person has their own opinion on this.
Your delivery your choice
He wants to sign his child’s birth certificate so he can LEGALLY be listed as the birth father from day 1
He doesn’t need to be in the room when baby is born for that but he does need to come to the hospital for it
The mother has the right to tell the hospital who she wants in with her. She can choose her own friend or mom or someone she trusts. She doesn’t have to choose the biological father.
this is where maturity come in to play. it’s not about just you and your feelings. he should be in there 100 percent regardless.
He doesn’t have to be in the room while you have your baby but he could be there and wait for the baby to be born and see it. A father that wants to be there for his child should be able to. Obviously that’s your decision either way.
Your body your choice
Your mother your mother that’s it . He has no right to be in their it’s a privilege. Things can change in a split second in there you need real support and love .
Its your CHOICE!!! No one else.
If you don’t want him there then that’s your choice xx
I wouldn’t care about my feelings toward him, if he wants to be a good dad he should be there for the birth of his child.
It’s your decision. Not his.
No a man never has a right in the delivery room. The mom calls the shots
No one has the right to be there except you. You can choose who goes in with you.
He deserves the right to see his child being born. It’s half his and half yours. Don’t take that from him if he WANTS to be a part of your child’s life. You even said yourself you feel he is going to be a good dad. To me it’s petty. Bet 4 months ago you didn’t have this question and had planned for him to be in the room.
Most hospitals allow the mother to choose who’s in the room during labor. It should be people who are supportive of the mother. A co-parent who isn’t together could always wait in the waiting room nearby, like additional family members would
You’re delivering the baby, the people in the room are your choice. Don’t let anyone guilt you into something you feel uncomfortable about. He can still sign the birth certificate and whatever else needed without being present for you pushing the baby out. I see these posts all the time and it makes me feel bad people actually feel an obligation to others during one of the most personal events of your life!
They can take turns going back n forth if u want. But ultimately It’s up to u. And how u feel about it. Do what u feel is comfortable for u. If I had to choose between him n my mom. My mom is coming before anybody.
I’ve had 2 babies since the covid 1 person rule and both times they said they would let someone else come in just the other person had to leave the building. Maybe just let him in after the baby is born so he could still be there in a way but not while you are in labor or not comfortable. Your choice though.
It’s a stressful time. Don’t make it more stressful. Have your mother in there with you. She will be comforting. He can wait in the waiting room and be the second to know about the birth.
You have the right to have who YOU want in the room with you, explain it to the Dr and nurse and they will tell him whatever you them to. My mom was the only one in the delivery room with all 3 of my babies im glad we have those special moments together, your mom won’t be here forever
Whatever causes you less stress and more support mama. My child’s father and I were together and I hardly allowed him in the room up until pushing, I wanted my mom and only one was allowed before actually giving birth. He was stressing me out while I was being induced so I asked him to leave and send my mom. We go through a lot and don’t need added stress
I would have him. It’s his baby not your mothers.
Saying the Mom calls the shots is dumb imo. The Mom doesn’t make the baby on her own, it takes 2.
Nooopeeeeee. He didn’t wanna support your pregnancy then he doesn’t need to be. You need positive people and only love in that delivery room. For your sake.
It’s not his right, but a privilege. You need to decide what’s best for you. Who’s gonna put you at ease and help you deal with labor and delivery. It doesnt matter, at this point, what he thinks. Labor and delivery is insanely stressful.
No he does not. Only if you choose to have him there.
I have mixed feelings on this- on one hand, your body, your choice. On the other, I’m just thinking how hurtful it might be for him to miss the birth of his child- put yourself in his shoes if roles were reversed. I know my husband was over joyed being in the room watching our son being delivered. I know your situation is different, and I don’t nessecarily think there is a wrong and right choice, but I do think his feelings are valid and should be considered. (Just obviously set boundaries on what your comfortable with him seeing/where he is going to be standing, and what you expect of him in the delivery room). Labor is a beautiful but scary experience, so you also deserve someone who is going to support and encourage you through it.
Bring the person who’s going to be supportive and listen to your needs and share your needs with the Dr when you’re not able to. If he was all that you’d still be in a relationship with him. Having a baby is hard. I kept passing out and was so confused and crying at the end I needed my BF to tell me it was time to agree to the C-section because I couldn’t think straight. Do you trust him to make that decision for you?
No, he doesn’t have a right to be there at all, maybe agree to him being at the hospital but not the actual birth, he won’t see they baby being born but will see the baby after (that’s how it was done years and years and years ago). Check with the hospital here it allowed the father and one-two birth partners (two of the father isn’t there)
Your choice your body still. He can see baby after they are born waiting in waiting room. Dont tell him your in labor til your about to give birth.
You laid down with this man and got pregnant. Its not right to keep him from the birth of his child just because you dont get along with him.
All these women saying “he should be in the room…” yall, no. Just because they’re on some what good terms doesn’t mean he needs to be in there. Obviously, she’s feeling some kinda way about him being in there. I would politely tell him no. But I’ll let you know when I go to the hospital. If he wants to wait outside the room, cool. If not, also cool. I’ll text you and you can come visit. Paperwork and b/c aren’t done until after baby is born anyways. Like next day… choose who you want and would be best for YOU.
Of course he should be allowed to see his child born it will form a bond and you can’t get that memory back ever don’t take that away from someone and most delivery rooms allow a few to come in and out so no need to worry about your mama being there also good luck with you delivery
Its your decision. Go with your instink
Up 2 u but if he isn’t around during your pregnancy now then I would say nope
Similar situation and i let him be there. But i was also allowed my mother and sister who were my support people through my pregnancy. If it is going to stress you out in any way then no. It is not his right to watch you give birth. And if you don’t feel comfortable with him being down in the business have him stand at your head.
The birthing process is about you.
Personally my OB didn’t mind me having multiple people, but not sure now since rules may apply. Maybe ask OB about how many people are allowed in the room. If you don’t want him there, tell nurses and they’ll keep him out.
But I think he should be there, my son’s dad and I were literally on the edge of separating when we went to deliver my son and he cried during the experience.
I’m gonna have the unpopular opinion because so many people always side with the mothers and never think about those fathers who want to be apart of their child’s life and literally have no rights only because the mother Carried that child and that’s wrong. I feel like he should be in the room that child is half his. If he’s stated he wants to be present and apart of that child’s life why in the world would you ever deny him that once in a lifetime chance to see the child you two share together being born? I feel it’s a little petty and selfish and again my opinion is an unpopular one but at what point do people stop thinking about themselves and put their children and their childrens feelings before their own?
He doesn’t have the right to be present at the birth. That is your health event, not his. And you are allowed to set that boundary and decide what’s best for you. He has a whole lifetime to facilitate and maintain a relationship with his child. And it can start after the L&D process is finished.
The whole point of a plus 1 is a support person.
Plus it’s a pretty hectic thing and your going to NEED that support person.
Bugger him he can see the baby after x
You need your “support” person to get you through a time you NEED SUpPORT! Hell no.
No at that point and that time in your pregnancy it’s about YOUR comfort. 
But please tell him to be at the hospital that way HE and whoever you pick can swap out with him right after the babies born…
My dear even in good relationships doulas leave the men in the other rooms and it’s just you and them women for support. I believe ultimately it’s your choice how you feel better supported less stressed in that time.
I hope for a healthy delivery for you and your child. And a speedy recovery.
I would want my mom also
Take Mom with you. This is one time in your life that you need your Mom. He can see them after you and the babies are all cleaned up and smiling. Good Luck!