Ever heard of mini wife syndrome?

Parenting
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I’m getting married to my partner soon and we have a 2 year old daughter together.

My partner has a 11 year old daughter and he has her full custody. The daughter’s mom is a drug addict and never contacted her for years.

My partner works a lot, as in a LOTTT, from morning until evening because he has 2 businesses so it means I am the one taking care of the house and the kids fulltime. I always put them first before me.

I just realized that my stepdaughter has this so called, “Mini Wife Syndrome”

Some signs that my stepkid has mini wife syndrome are:

•Sense of entitlement that she should always take first place in her dad’s life.

•Constant attention-seeking behavior to maintain that position

•Control-seeking behavior, such as creating her own household rules.

•Engages in “flirty” behavior with her dad, like fawning or excessive baby talk.

•Competitive with me, including competing for physical affection :disappointed:

•Using physical affection to monopolize her dad, such as constantly clinging to and climbing on him.

•She’s always expecting of being included in adult decision-making

•Expectation that her opinions & preferences should carry the same weight as adults in the household.

•“Parenting” her own Dad & me— telling us what to do or not do.

•Making 1-on-1 plans with her Dad that deliberately exclude me.

*you may Google it for more infos.
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I am also trying my very best on how to make my stepdaughter feel love and not to make her think that I am competing with her.
That I see her also as my own daughter yet it’s so hard to be in this situation and trying my best to fix these behaviors. But obviously, I can’t.
I know I have to seek help from a Family therapist.

Should I talk about this “Mini Wife
Syndrome” to my partner?
I’m so worried that he might be offended about this yet I am really struggling and feel outsider in our family. Please help me. I feel so helpless.

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Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. Ever heard of mini wife syndrome? - Mamas Uncut

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He will take offense. I would get her a therapist and have them decide and tell your husband. Then it’s not on you.

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Shoot my child does this lol it’s a fight everyday she is biologically mine lol

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Seems like the real problem here is your jealous of your step daughter so you made this random list trying to make her sound bad all while making yourself look like an ass. She’s absolutely allowed to do stuff with her dad without you. And she did come first in her dad’s life for a very long time. And flirting with her dad??? Really??? You need serious help.

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Your boyfriend SHOULD be very offended, or rather, at the very least very uncomfortable because it is his fault. The fact that you don’t realize eleven is too young to have all this blame stacked on her shoulders makes me think you are very unstable.

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No, she misses her dad because he’s never home.
You’re making normal behavior sound super creepy. Stop that.

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He will definitely take offense. She is far too old to be climbing all over him and to be “flirty” or fawning. It’s not appropriate at all. She doesn’t seem to understand there is a difference between husband-wife or any adult romantic relationship versus parent - child relationships. This is very unhealthy for her. She is not a toddler and needs to learn appropriate boundaries.

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Oh my gawd, she’s a fucking daddy’s girl. Don’t be dramatic. How long have yall been together?? Obviously she’s been an only child most of her life and had all the attention. Now he’s getting married and has another child. Of course she is going to act up. And telling her daddy she has mini wife syndrome because you Google her actions instead actually getting a licensed therapist to diagnose her will most definitely offend him. What the fuck is wrong with you?? Sounds like you’re jealous of a little girl.

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I couldn’t ever get in between my children and their Dad, that’s their relationship and it’s always going to be different than the relationship I have with them. Shame on you for being jealous of your partners relationship with his child and yes he should put her first. I still have a lot of resentment towards my mom for marrying a drug addict who tried to kill her 2 years ago, im 36.

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If you can’t communicate with him now, pre marriage, then how will you communicate with him post wedding? It’s sounds like you have deeper issues than your step daughters jealousy towards you. If you can’t be an open book with your partner, and vice versa, then you have deeper issues. Have a conversation with your fiancé, tell him that you all need family therapy and make sure you include both children, and start your marriage out on a healthy note. And do this before you get married.

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So let me get this straight. Her father is never home. Her mother didn’t want her. Of course she’s going to cling to her dad when he is around. He’s all she has. And honestly, some of the stuff you described is normal 11 year old behavior. She’s entering her teenage years. She’s going to start acting like a teenager.

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I think you should talk to your husband,see how he feels about family therapy. Therapy would help you all in making adjustments into a new family. Give your new step daughter time and love and patience.

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Sounds like an only child struggling to share her dad, and a bitchy step mom that wants to attach nasty labels to her instead of actually getting her fucking help. “Mini wife syndrome” gftoh with that bullshit. She is a child struggling and needs help and compassion. With your attitude towards her it’s no wonder there’s a power struggle. Try empathy once in a while.

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She honestly sounds like she has lacked a lot of control in her life, and that her dad has been something consistent. He’s clearly very busy and maybe she just misses him? Instead of making everything inappropriate, maybe find a way to help fill the need she is trying to express.

Does dad do stuff with her individually often? If not, maybe he should look into doing something with her alone once a week. There is absolutely nothing wrong with her wanting quality alone time with her dad.

Try to include her in decisions that are reasonable, such as planning dinner, family outings, what movie to watch etc. When it comes to harmless stuff like this, her opinion should be equal to the adults if possible. If it’s not, provide 2-3 options so she still feels like she has some control.

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She probably misses her dad. I see nothing wrong with her wanting one on one time with him. And I don’t think this is super uncommon. I could be wrong but went through this to an extent with my daughter and her dad (we’re not together ) when she was younger. She always wanted to be the boss

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Maybe you could go to a therapist and get some direction around this. Before you start diagnosing a child. She’s absolutely entitled to make plans with her dad. If it’s been the 2 of them for most of her life it’s wild to me that you think she needs to adjust. Maybe you need to have a look at why your so jealous. Get over yourself. That’s his baby I sure hope she comes before you.

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She is number one in his life and always should be they come as a package she will be scared of losing her dad and having no mum she is going to be more clingy involve her in everything

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From an outsider perspective, I feel she should trump you as far as who takes first place in their fathers life. You might be his wife, but she is his child. I would expect that my boyfriend and I’s child comes before me to him. If we ever break up, she would be put ahead of anyone I were to ever see and I would hope he would put her before anyone else. Her attention seeking behavior sounds like a girl who just wants her dads attention. The things that you were listing make it sound that you are jealous of your stepdaughter and feel you trump her. It sounds like you should go see a counselor to talk about it. When you mentioned she does excessive baby talk and how she’s clinging to him - it sounds like she is having some of her own problems considering her mom is a drug addict - she doesn’t have a relationship with her mom and her dad is always gone working. I would honestly probably see about getting her a counselor or someone she can talk to about her feelings and stuff to benefit her. I am sure she has hurt feelings even if she doesn’t discuss them with you or her dad. I would talk to your fiancé about thoughts and feelings and suggest counseling :purple_heart: try to hang in there!

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You’re kidding right. This is normal. If you see her wanting her dad’s attention as flirty you have issues. I’m in the field. Also the fact you use the word competing worries me for this child. It’s not a competition. She is first and always will be and should be. Yes she needs therapy so she can cope with trauma of her mother not wanting her. But that’s it. She’s allowed to want her dad, she’s allowed to live him and show him affection.

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This whole post makes me sad. She SHOULD be first she may need a therapist but not cause of what you think. You for sure need therapy poor kid I feel terrible for her. How should she feel when her dad works alot and he mother isn’t around

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He may or may not be upset but either way it should be addressed regardless, if she flat out tells you both what to do, he should have some sort of clue especially if she is constantly doing it. Maybe you could talk to her about it, set up “house rules” together, or maybe talk to your partner and suggest he has a “father/daughter day once a week or something like that or try for a family day where you all go. Either way I do think therapy could be beneficial and she may even like going, but do keep in mind she is only 11 and essentially for the most part of her life it was probably just her and her dad and that could play a roll to, she could just be going through a phase that children go through. When you are used to one thing for so long sometimes it is hard to accept change regardless of your age.

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Her dad has been the only one in her life consistently. Of course she feels all those things

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Sounds like you might want to look into therapy for yourself. To work on the feeling helpless and outsider in your family.

My husband works a lot. My 5 year old misses him. Add to that an attention seeking and clingy personality.
You’re taking normal kid behavior and trying to make it something weird to make yourself feel better.

If you decide to talk to your fiancé, I’d do it about your feelings and not how you think the child is behaving like a mini wife.

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First of all, you’re not a professional. You can’t diagnose her with something based off shit you read on the internet. Secondly, it is not in appropriate for her to want to have time with just her dad. He’s all she’s got. You need to step back and evaluate your feelings around this because it’s not healthy. Sounds like a very normal father-daughter relationship. And for her wanting to be involved in adult decisions, that’s also just normal for her age. She has probably had to grow up a lot faster than typical 11 year olds because of her past and feels like she is mature enough to be a part in them (she’s obviously not) so this is a conversation he needs to have with her. To remind her that she’s still a kid and to enjoy it before she actually does have to make big adult decisions.

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This is ridiculous grow up

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Im a mom of a child whos dad abandoned her for drugs…

…and this is pretty gross. Be a part of her peace and healing…or reevaluate your upcoming marriage. You think trauma is…“Mini Wife Syndrome”…?! I am so glad my partner isnt this way about my daughters emotional state and needs…

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She’s a child omg you’re the one with a problem

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I think it’s gross that you would characterize a daughter’s affection towards her father as “flirty”

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Lmao never heard of mini wife syndrome…

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Excuse me while I go vomit wtf and no I ain’t googling that shit

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The BABY !! Is 2
Gtfoh

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I think you need therapy individually and then as a family.

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Sorry, but she wants to be with her dad. Not her step mom. So, when he comes home she is happy to see him. Happy to be around him. Wants to make plans with ONLY him…she spends enough time with you. And yes, she wants to be INCLUDED! Especially while he’s there!
I was here. I was that little girl. I feel for her. Do better and stop being jealous of their relationship. Talk to her. And get her a counselor ASAP!

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Her mother left her and her dad works all of the time so when he is around she wants his attention I don’t think she is trying to push you out.I think she has a fear of abandonment because of her mother so she clings to her father out of fear of him leaving too.I think that you would all benefit from family counseling.

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Honestly sounds like a bit of insecurity from you both because he is out of the home so much you both want his attention.

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You should see a therapist. This is a little girl, who was around before you, who is smack dab in the middle of growing up. She’s a child. You sound like you’re not aware of how children in this stage typically act. You are the adult and she is not the problem here. Some counseling for you and maybe the whole family. There seems to be a lot of assumptions and poor communication and understanding based on this post.

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This post may be better suited for the unapologetic stepmom group. You’ll get better feedback without being attacked. It’s a great group.

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You’re ridiculous and maybe you n your daughter should move out since you’re jealous of a 11 year old little girl n thinking she’s flirting with her own father which is honestly purely disgusting you’re even think that honestly. She’s been thru fricking trauma too aka her mom being a drug addict n not seeing her at all. She misses her mom n she misses her dad since he works morning to night then there’s another little one involved too so of course she’s feeling like she has to compete for his attention. Either grow tf up or get out of this childs life

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Wow…ha okay I think you should realize she wants and misses her dad and that it’s her dad…of course she wants to be around him and wants his attention due to ( working alot ALOT and never being around,your words) so stop being jelly of an 11 yr old an understand her she is a child for goodness sake and your acting like she is the adult nanny or babysitter trying to step in on your man…geesh…grow up…you put them first really cuz seems like your implying some pretty weird and almost nasty stuff on a child…and being alot more jelly the not understanding or there for them…not to sound mean but she don’t want you…she wants her dad…nothing wrong with that and stop making it more then it is…tell your man to hire people to run his businesses and spend more time at home and pay his child some d**n attention…and you cuz your obviously need it being that insecure or whatever it is that you can’t see she wants,needs attention for HER dad…and trying to imply she is wifing her dad your man

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It’s called daddy daughter bond! :woman_facepalming:t4:

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She is first and she is not “flirting” with her father, because she wants his attention. Of course she probably hasn’t made a relationship with you, because you think she’s competition, which is just freaking weird as all get out. His love for her has nothing to do with his love for you. My husband loves my daughter way more than me and that’s how it’s supposed to be. That’s his baby?

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She WILL always take top priority in her dads life. Weirdo!!!

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As a young kid I clung to my mom especially when she met my now step dad. I was a teenager but I felt abandoned by my dad and my mom was a divorcee with my ex step dad who I hated.

She needs therapy to work through her feelings and sounds like you need it to as well.

Kids get clingy & protective of the parent whose always been around.

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It sounds to me like you’re projecting and are the one actually competing here. This is no competition for a child, that is her father…and doesn’t have to compete with you…get a grip and get over yourself.

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Im coming back around for a second comment…because…serious question…

What the fμ©k did I just even read…?

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I mean, she should come first. If her own father isn’t going to put her first who will? Clearly not her drug addict mother or her self adsorbed jealous step mum. Sheesh. What a nightmare.

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Damn…shes 11, she’s probably got hormones she’s dealing with, she doesn’t get to see her dad and her mom isn’t around. Maybe take a step back and really look at life from her perspective.
She should have one on one time with her dad.
It’s normal for her to want his attention, especially since he isn’t around and now she has to share him with a new baby.
She didn’t ask for the life she has, give her a break.

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Yikes :grimacing: Seems to me if that were going on it would be so alarming that it would be obvious to everyone including ur partner so I believe what these women are saying and I think u really need to re-evaluate the situation and see wats going on inside of u and seek help for those issues…

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Shes a child. Hes her dad :woman_shrugging:t3: literally speechless.

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Redflag, hope he leaves you.

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Sounds like a normal daddy daughter relationship to me. You’re being jealous and nasty!

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That’s not “mini wife syndrome….” That’s a daughter who’s in a prime age to be going through some rocky emotions and is looking for support and guidance from the one stable parent in her life…… she will always come first.

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Can I have some examples of what you consider flirting? I was really taken aback by that

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Oh my god this is terrible. Therapy for the whole family before a google diagnosis.

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Wow. Some of you are real assholes. This is a legit issue that comes up in many blended families. I am now a blended family and have dealt with this also.

My 12 year old acts the same way towards me. Her father, who used to be involved, is not anymore because he got involved with a drug addict.

When I read the list of behaviors you listed, I thought you had been around my child, and yes, even the flirting. And she’s MY daughter.

She is currently in counseling, she goes weekly, and then once a month, we all attend a family session.

Yes, my daughters are priority and number one. However, kids must learn boundaries. And your adult relationship with your partner is also important. I’m so tired of people acting like that relationship no longer matters once you have children. My intimacy with my spouse, my alone time with him, my adult conversations with him regarding finances and other decisions, are not discussions my children need to be a part of….BECAUSE THEY ARE CHILDREN…

I would have a discussion about the things you have noticed. Be delicate when bringing it up and just discuss your observations. Remember to be respectful of his relationship with his daughter, but your feelings are also valid. It’s a balancing act, but you can do it!

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Sounds to me like she needs more time with dad… as you said he works alllllll the time. She’s probably in bed or about to be by the time he gets home… you have time with him once the kids are sleeping… she does not.
Don’t be jealous of your step daughter…

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Are you fricken kidding me? Wth is this? You sound jealous of your step daughter- how about start with that!

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…. You can’t be serious. That’s his DAUGHTER… HER ONLY PARENT, DUE TO THE MOMS DRUG ADDICTION… the little girl sounds like the life I lived. My dad raised me from 2 months old. Around 9-13 he was my bestfriend & favorite person to be & hang around. Until I turned 13+ I never wanted to be home & always be with my friends. U better let her love her dad she never even sees him considering he works so much. When he’s actually home she’s excited to see & be around him because THATS HER ACTUAL dad, your not her mom. I can see why she would be this excited to finally get some time with him. Sounds like your weird step mom, which I also had growing up. Guess what my dad did when I felt weird about her? Kicked her out of the picture cause IIIII came first in his life :100:

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You do understand that at 11 years old she knows her mom chose drugs over her?? Like, is it that hard to imagine she is doing everything in her power to ensure she doesn’t lose her dad too?? You call it mini wife syndrome whereas it’s truly abandonment issues. She needs to see a professional. And you need to see one as well in order to help the two of you cope separately. Her father will likely be brought in to some of her sessions. Maybe even you as well. And your husband will likely be brought into some of your sessions.

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This group posts the most ridiculous things anymore. :joy::joy::joy::joy:

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I dont agree with lots of these comments, she’s a child and should not be part of adult decision making of any kind. My neighbors daughter is exactly like this, and its really horrible watching this girl do these things. I don’t have the answers to this but one things for sure, I wouldn’t tolerate it for one minute

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This is the kind of step mother I fear for my kids to have.

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Yta , you’re the red flag

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For those skeptics this is a real thing and best thing available for all involved is boundaries and serious structure and therapy to help nurse respect actual mini wife syndrome is rough af and often comes from very intelligent children who have faced trauma and manipulation in their life

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Maybe she’s afraid of being chosen last again as her own mother did to her.

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Therapy is def needed for her but not bc of this syndrome you’ve decided to put on her. But bc she’s navigating a tough age with only one parent who is busy trying to provide for and the other is a trauma filled person and now she’s has you…. and instead of trying to engage her and really make a loving trusting relationship with her your over here doing this. Shes a child that’s growing up and sometimes she’s going to be immature and sometimes she’s have mature moments. That’s not flirting with her dad…. And she should be first in his life, all of you should be first. His children come before you an adult who can hopefully function on your own. Is she pushing boundaries absolutely and that’s normal for her age, for the new family situation, and for the fact that she doesn’t see dad a lot. I’d suggest reading a book about preteens and teenagers and then get some therapy to help you navigate life. But if you keep this up he’s going to leave.

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Flirting??? You are being ridiculous and jealous!!! Hope someone here knows who you are and sends your “partner” a screenshot because unless he’s a shit of a dad he must think HIS daughter is loved and well taken care of by you! You’ve been in this CHILDS life for at least 3 years and you still have NOT bonded with her!!!

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How long have y’all been together and how old was she when he got custody of her. What has your relationship been with her. Have you been having her baby sit, and essentially treating her like a mini adult? There are so many questions.

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I swear support groups should just be renamed judgment groups but as I continue mini wife syndrome exist and 11 years old is not old enough to be included in adult decisions or conversations that needs to be corrected now unless you want a 16 year old telling you what to do and bringing boys home to spend the night I’ve seen it and dealt with it thanks to my little sister and my mom and her dad allowing this shitty behavior and as for saying just because her mom chose drugs boo fucking who stop allowing ones behavior or choices define letting a child develop shitty behavior or use it as an excuse to always be needy or the center of attention this is coming from a person who’s mother chose drugs all her life and a father who worked non stop and barely seen my dad on the weekends he did have with me talk to the dad get some counseling and set up boundaries my 5 year old doesn’t climb or hang all over her dad get the daughter some one on one counseling and make the dad set up an alone time day once a week

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You sound like a psycho and I seriously hope you change your tune. I feel so bad for your step daughter. Everything you wrote sounds completely ridiculous and clearly this little girl needs to spend one on one time with her dad and that doesn’t involve you so you need to get over yourself and grow up!

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Could it be more of separation anxiety rather than “mini wife syndrome” I think maybe with not knowing when her mum is coming or going it’s alot likely that she feels she could loose another bio parent.

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Some of you are so fucking rude!
I mean, is this how you would speak to your best friend or sister if they came to you with these concerns?
Everyone always has shit to talk, until a situation happens to them or someone they love.

Could it be nothing, absolutely. Could it be something as she describes, absolutely. Point, some form of therapy needs to happen for everyone.

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You need therapy luv

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So I actually had something similar to this. I never knew there was a title for it. I had to put myself and my own boys first as well. I asked my husband if my boys and I needed to find a new place to live. He said no and stepped in and realized what was happening at that point.
Also-another thing that helped us is becoming a United front. And something we learned about in church. Because we went to a blended families church class. There are 2 circles in a family. The outer circle is the family/kids, inner circle are the parents. We as parents need to stand as a United front together and show our children this. That does not mean we don’t put them first, it means that we show them solidarity and don’t allow the wedge in between. Especially when we have a child together. You have your inner circle-the parents. We can’t and should not let our children in that circle. This is where we stand as a united front. We pay bills, date each other, ya know basically adult things. The outter circle-is the family unit basically. We plan things together as a family unit. We plan vacations, talk about different things, etc.
your daughter is wanting attention from her dad and in the meantime is pushing you away probably as a way to protect herself if that makes sense. It took us several years but we are finally in a good spot and there is no longer competition. When I say my daughter was competitive with me, and I wasn’t. I put my husbands watch on my wrist one day and said dang this is big on me. She then grabbed it and goes yeah but it’s much bigger on me. Just keep loving her through it. Talk with her about how certain things aren’t appropriate. And you need to have a true sit down conversation with your husband. Don’t keep things locked in. That is the fastest way to ruin your marriage. Trust me. Take it from someone who knows.

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All I hear is that, your partner should kick your jealous butt out. Your disgusting

It’s called TRAUMA, NOT MINI WIFE SYNDROME…🤦

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I have 3 girls and that sounds like a typical daughter to me. She most likely has abandonment issues from her mom, so she’s going to be attached to her dad. Try doing more mother daughter activities just you two to make her feel special and loved by both of you.

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While I don’t know a thing about mini wife syndrome, what I can say is that it is VERY COMMON for a Stepchild to hold a jealous side for a new Stepparent. And alot of the times, it’s NOT because they don’t like the new parent or want to hurt anyone’s feelings, alot of times it’s simply because that’s how they know their relationship with that parent. Both my oldest AND his oldest did this at 1st. My oldest is a boy, and his was a girl. Go figure. :rofl: As soon as we realized what was going on, we instantly set boundaries, and we looked into therapy. Becoming a blended family is more work then most realize, and it’s not just the parents they need to heal, but the children too.
Good luck honey!

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You seem weirdly jealous of your step daughter, your an adult act like it and stop being creepy

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And I forgot to add i will be damned if it be mine bio or step or any other child try to tell me what I can not do in a house where I clean and pay bills and cook for everyone and hold shit down I am the adult a child needs to stay in a child’s place so whether it is a syndrome or jealousy there still needs to be a level of respect for the adults in the house and I’d be damned if my child thought she could run her mouth or act grown to my ex partner who ever it is

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I dealt with the exact same thing. My boyfriend’s daughter had made weird comments about her father, like things she was curious about, about him. But she would compete with me for affection, contact, time. I was never competing, she was more than welcome to spend time with her father and I encouraged it! However she didn’t want it, until he was making an effort to do something with me. She was also 15 when I came into their lives, and therefore had been woman of the house for a long time. It took a while for her to see me as a blessing, as I never tried to act as though I was above her. Eventually she saw that I’m the one who does the cleaning, the cooking. I’ve helped her fill out job applications and make a resume. I know exactly what you’re talking about, but you have to win them over just like you do their father. And a child who has been abandoned by a MOTHER needs to be shown love and understanding. He is now my fiancé, and me and the girl have an AMAZING relationship.

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Far out a lot of you people are just downright vicious hey. Im sure you’d all disagree though, clearly you as strangers have far more insight into the goings on in the household than the actual wife and mother…
Get a grip of yourselves and your online antics

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You sound like a walking red flag… like are you seriously jealous and kind of sexualizing a father daughter relationship?? Maybe she is just hurting and feels like she needs to be number one to her father… which she should be… any decent parent would put their child ahead of their new partner.

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His daughter should come first.

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I have 2 girls (10 and 4)…let me tell you this is typical. My oldest thinks she should help with making decisions that should be up to her father and I, but we listen anyways and always consider her input because it is her feelings too.

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Y’all judgemental aholes need to stop… this is a legit thing that happens… can’t say I have this problem, but my step sister was the same way when she was little… Sounds INSANE I know… but it happens… with my baby sister and this girl I think it happened because they had abandonment issues and had lived through the trauma of their bio moms leaving them for a drug habit. She is fighting for control from fear in my opinion. She needs to have boundaries set AND be reassured that she will ALWAYS be safe and loved by you both no matter what. I would suggest family counseling to work through these feelings. There is nothing for anyone to be ashamed or embarrassed about. She is a child who has lived through trauma. Period.

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This is ridiculous :joy: This daughter has one active parent in her life & she will always be #1. Children come first, period. Just because it’s on Google it doesn’t make it any less ridiculous. She is 11. Maybe you should stop competing with an 11 year old& focus on what need to change within yourself. I pray you bring this to her father so he can see exactly what he’s getting himself into. Only one to feel bad in this situation is that little girl.

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For everyone saying that this is normal daughter behavior IT ABSOLUTELY IS NOT! The step daughter thinks she is equal to step mom and mini wife syndrome is a real thing… if you don’t know anything about being a step mom instead of criticizing her do some research on how common this is for step daughters and step moms to go through this! And to OP I suggest joining some step mama groups! They will truly help you because only bio moms think that this is sucking or your jealous when you have a real Issue

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Other than trying to get her into a therapist to be able to discuss her fears of change in a safe environment I honestly can understand why she’s like this. For 1 her dad is always working so getting the attention she craves from him is natural. Actually I think a lot of this is natural given her situation and more of an anxiety disorder rather than “mini mom” whatever it is you’re misdiagnosed her with. Don’t fight her, she should be daddy’s first priority. Explain to her you would never take him away and add on some family therapy after she’s had some sessions for herself.

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Wow mini wife syndrome :rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl: you have got to be kidding seriously sounds to me like your jealous bruhhh talk to your man regardless hurt his feelings your obviously feeling some type of way better to express yourself before it becomes to much for you to Handel but still @miniwifesyndrome​:rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl:

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Lol. This sounds like a normal 11 year old and You sound jealous of a child.

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Tbh I wouldn’t say your jealous, I wouldn’t say your stepdaughter is in the wrong but sounds of it she feels pushed out and she’s seeking attention, maybe speak to her, ask her if everything Omaha dm reassure her that if she has any problems and wants to speak about anything then you’re always there to listen openly!

Maybe take her in days out etc, make her fele special, maybe it’s because she’s not got her mjm around like your 2 year old daughter has? Maybe she feels left out because your 2 year old daughter has both her mjm and dad there she hasn’t got her mjm yoy should really try step up and be the mjm she wants and deserves, the mum that helps her through life, she will need the mum bond the older she gets now!

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You and your soon to be husband need to tell her that she can’t make the rules or and adult choices because she isn’t the parent or adult as for her being clingy with her dad that’s normal sit down with your step daughter talk to her shes probably hurting right now and feels like only her dad is there for her and of course she’s going to be acting out she’s 11

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You feel jealous you mean.

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Its hard to know what to say when you say she fits this syndrome and rhyme off “symptoms” with out examples. And alot of those symptoms could easily be a young person setting boundaries (is she telling you to knock before entering her room or saying no one walk around the livingroom after 9pm cuz she says so) feeling disrespected and being disrespected are two entirely different things :woman_shrugging: all I do know is you need to be careful when “chiding” and young person on what you believe is sexual misbehavior

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I have heard of mini wife syndrome, my daughter has a few traits herself from it being just her and I all the time and now that there is a new person in the picture it’s different. Maybe try taking her to do a mini mani with you or ask her what she would like to do and you and her go do it together that will help build the bond between you and her… also try not to be to physical with dad when she is around (hard, I know, been there) it takes time but eventually she will get the picture that you trying to help and not take dad away from her​:hibiscus::hibiscus::hibiscus: I hope this helps and good luck

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I would talk to him about family therapy but I wouldn’t go telling him diagnosises you think his child has, that will create a huge mess. Sounds like kiddo has had a rough go to start her life

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She IS number 1 to her father and that shouldnt be an issue with you. There is nothing wrong with a little girl loving her dad. Maybe YOU are making HER feel like she has compete for her dads attention and affection.

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She sounds like a typical 11 year old girl…

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Tell ur fiancé that you think family therapy can help y’all. Instead of sounded like your being mean bc step daughter can twist this around to make u look like the bad guy.