Everything my husband does gets on my nerves

I need to know if anyone else has these feelings or not or if I just truly dislike my husband.We have been married for 12 years and I kid you not the way he chews his food gets under my skin. I can’t stand the way he chews, the way he scrolls his phone, the same shirt he wears to bed every day…like everything he does gets on my nerves lately and it isn’t even his fault…I am becoming more and more annoyed as the days pass. I love him but idk if I can get over how I am feeling. is this normal or is the the end of us?

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Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. Everything my husband does gets on my nerves

is it possible you need counseling?

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Welcome to marital bliss.

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It could be a hormone issue, or maybe you’re just not in love with him anymore.

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You could be going through menopause…I’m going through menopause and the things that never bothered me before bother me more than ever now

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I think u should get a pregnancy test done maybe u are pregnant that’s why maybe your hormones are playing haywire with u​:kissing_heart::kissing_heart::kissing_heart:

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The Honeymoon Phase has ended :rofl::rofl::rofl:

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Definitely might be pregnant. This is exactly how I felt towards my husband during my last pregnancy….lol, poor guy

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You come to the internet w the most dumbest complaints. … Get help…

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Menopause will make you feel like that

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:joy: literally went through almost this exact same thing. Can’t give you any advice though haha.

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I totally understand this. I have Misaphonia and I can’t stand anyone chewing…but when mad it’s intense anger… :slightly_frowning_face: you have to talk to him and possibly both need professional counseling.

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Pretty normal. My SO and I been together for 14 years and everything annoys me too. :joy: I swear he chews so loud and I feel like I should not be able to hear you swallow your food. I can hear it going down! :no_mouth:
But I still love him. He’s not perfect and neither am I. I probably annoy him too :sweat_smile::joy:

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Been there, done that. I found personal counseling helped quite a bit. My prior traumas were triggered by extra stimulus, even though they weren’t related whatsoever. Counseling and medical care helped my sanity, especially when there’s underlying stressors due to every day life, hormones etc

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Divorce. Lol… seriously, maybe some counseling? :woman_shrugging:

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Watch the episode of Scrubs where Carla wants Turk to get his mole removed.

Your not alone lol :laughing: I feel it’s normal after so long

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How old. Are you? Could it be early menopause?( men-o-pause time???!)

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My husband has recently passed and I think this is terrible for you to feel this way and I’m sorry that you do you feel this way it must be hard

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Pregnant? I asked my husband if he had to breathe when i was pregnant :flushed:

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Grow up. Wonder how perfect you think you are?

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Create grace. It will help you so much

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Putin is not the enemy FYI

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I feel the same. Don’t like mine at all, but it’s been almost 43yrs

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so you’re saying he annoys you… interesting :thinking::dagger::woman_shrugging::dollar::yen::footprints::shushing_face:

Stop. He is a person too. None of us are perfect.

Tasha Cornelius is that you

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Married 17 years. Everything has its seasons. :heart:

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Be glad he wants to have a meal with you. Be glad he sits down on the couch with you while hes on his phone. Some wives only wish their husbands would come home and spend time with them. If he were to die tomorrow, you would miss those things. Be thankful you have a husband who wants to be around you. Im sure you have annoying traits too.

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I went through a phase like that! Well a couple actually. Only lasts a few weeks and then we are back to normal🤣 this time it was induced thanks to pregnancy haha! Could be your hormones!

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I got that way when my hormones were acting up during my monthly, I also felt like that pretty much the whole 9 months of my last pregnancy. :joy:

Currently 32 weeks pregnant with our second and my hormones aren’t nearly as bad thankfully but certain smells set me off and can ruin my mood lol.

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Reminded me of some of the lyrics to “Cell Block Tango” from Chicago, lol

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How old are you? Could be menopause

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You might be pregnant or menopause

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Well this goes back to my theory that most humans aren’t meant to mate for life. 12 years is a long run. People change. Maybe you were just meant to be together for a decade. Move on to the next chapter. Something new, fun and interesting may be in store for you 🤷🏼

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Can you see a therapist? Maybe they can help you figure it all out…

This was me when I was 3rd trimester with him lol :joy:

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This is definitely the End!!!

I pray my husband never feels about me like you do yours :cry:

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Menopause possibly?? Its real you just get so annoyed.

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The more you focus on the bad/annoying traits, the more you will notice it. Try to focus on your husband’s positive traits and habits. Before I judge my husband, I think - I am in no way perfect and how would I feel if he picked up only my faults? (This is coming from a place of support and love - not judging - just trying to give you another way to think about things)

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Girl, woman, friend. This is my life. I can’t fricking stand him most days.
They Call it the 7 year itch
The 10 year itch.
For me it’s the 11 year itch.
Literally he could be breathing and I’d get annoyed.
He is a great man. Works hard. Is a good father.
I think it’s hard to live with someone day in and day out with out eventually getting annoyed by them one way or another. What you’re going through is normal. That doesn’t mean it should be ignored. I have been going to counseling and it has helped me so much. See the bigger picture. And give him more grace for the things that drive me crazy.
We bicker we banter.
Personal development has also helped me. Reading books like relationship fix. Or these connection cards my counselor recommended.
Most things can be fixed if you put forth the effort. He needs to be aware also. If he has no clue it’s gonna be hard for him to reciprocate. Good luck. I don’t have all the answers but I am literally going thru the same thing. I love him to death. But damn. Haha I feel you :100:
Get away, do things for yourself, by yourself or with others. Find a hobby.
I hope this helps

Therapy to get to the bottom of YOUR issue

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Definitely normal after so long. Been with my husband 12 years and known him for 15 years. No one is perfect. I know I drive him crazy too :tipping_hand_woman:t2:

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This is me postpartum

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I don’t know from the sounds of it, you might wanna think about possibly separating from him. None of us wanna see u on the TV show, snapped. Seriously

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He probably isnt doing anything any different than he has for the last 12 years so its you, everything is fine with alzheimer/dimentia patients when all they do is be confused and forgetful but when they turn mean and intolerant its no longer fun, you need to figure yourself out or let him go, what are you gonna do put all his food thru a blender so he doesnt have to chew ?

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I go through this. I’m a person that requires alone time to decompress and if I don’t get that, everything annoys me! Try taking a few days apart! Long enough where you miss each other.

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Menopause…maybe some underlying resentment? Or maybe something you are not happy with within yourself. Get back to dating and break this daily habit of finding his faults. Something is happening with in you. Find your happy place…:+1:

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Kind of sounds like something to do with your hormones acting crazy.

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I wouldn’t know but I can tell you I annoy my husband the same way yours annoys you so I’d guess it’s fairly normal

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There’s phases :woman_shrugging:t3: I’ve been with my husband for 8 years and there’s some days I can’t stand him and some days I worship the ground he walks on. I think that just comes with living together. Take some you time!! :heart: you love your husband, but anyone can be annoying when they’re up your ass long enough

Kim Hughes if this isn’t me with Adam :joy: … Even when he is asleep he anoys me :sweat_smile:

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Sounds like you’re resenting him for some reason.

My best advice is get over the little things cause 33 years later you won’t even remember the little things! Seriously though it could be far worse. Only you can decide if you can do it. Can you still remember why you wanted to be with this man?

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I don’t wanna invalidate your feelings, bc you’re entitled to them. But I have to say that I was right where you are. And then my husband died tragically. And I’d give EVERYTHING to have his annoying self here with us now. Please fix it❤

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I felt this way Everytime I got pregnant. Not necessarily any flaws about my husband but it bothered me how he responded back to me in a smart a** way (like normal but that’s just who he is) and everything around me bothered me bad.

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idk… maybe go to counseling? Stop being so easy to annoy? Ask him to eat quietly. But hun a different shirt to wear to bed? Like… maybe the problem is you & not him.

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wow maybe menopause has got the best of you

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It’s normal, but love conquers all!

I feel the same way about mine often it’s not a good feeling I’m very stressed out lately :frowning:

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I don’t think this is normal. Or maybe I’m abnormal. My husband and I have been together for 15 years and have four kids. I’m still obsessed with him, literally obsessed. I could spend(and often do) every second with him, and it would not be enough.
No advice, but I hope it gets better for you.

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One week every month even if he looks at me I feel enraged :rofl: jokes but I’m the same I annoy him too it’s love :kissing_heart: :rofl:

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Doesn’t have to be the end. Get to the bottom of the problem why you feel like this and work on that. Counselling can help or try more constructive communication with eachother.
If that doesnt helpqybe its time to part…

Remember things domt get fixed over night though

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I really hope you were joking when you wrote that or uh-oh, the end is near my dear​:expressionless::pleading_face:

Anytime I find myself feeling some type of way, I quickly remind myself how sad I would be if I couldn’t live each day with him. I quickly remember those little things don’t matter when you remind yourself not everyday is guaranteed. I hope that helps.

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I always tell my husband he is the child I never wanted. I know this sounds horrible but it’s the truth. Sometimes I feel like his mom instead of his wife. We have been through alot. But I keep on truckin with him.

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I think you should separate for awhile while you do some work on yourself. You will either realize separation was the right move, or you’ll want to work it out.

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You just need to pause and figure out why. Could you be pregnant? Could it be menopause? Are you extra stressed out and your feelings are just taking it out on him? Do you need a snack or a nap (Haha :stuck_out_tongue_winking_eye: don’t underestimate those! :joy:)? There’s probably just something else that’s the matter and since he’s the closest to you, he’s the one that could sneeze wrong and you’d be livid. Just take a step back and try to think about it for a sec. You might surprise yourself.

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You love him yes, but are you in love with him still? They are 2 very different things.

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I couldn’t stand when mine blinked …but it was a lot to get to that point!! Now the Ex…lol

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I can’t stand the way my boyfriend (of 12 years) chews either… especially chips or candy!! My I can’t stand the way my kids chew either … pretty sure I’ve got that can’t stand noise disorder lol

To me it sounds like you need some time to recharge your batteries. What do you do for self-care?

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I think we all go through this from time to time when we live with a person for so many years. Some weeks i cant stand my husband but i love him so i just push those thoughts to the back of my head, and then when it passes i notice i was just under a lot of stress.

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Following cuz same :joy::joy:

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There’s an underlying reason for this.
Most likely he’s not giving you something you unknowingly want. Did anything change? Or is there another relationship or man you’re comparing you/him to?

Could be hormonal changes. May sound silly, but it can change your mood and overall happiness.

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this usually immediately precedes an imminent and necessary break up.

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We need to normalize having your own space as an adult while being in a relationship. Living in different places and finding yourself again is ok.

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Take some time for you! Maybe you guys need to bring a spark back? Maybe a date night (that doesn’t include eating lol).

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Are you IN love though ?

I’ve been married for almost 40 year’s and yes he gets on my nerves, but I get on his too. I have to have what I call my me time. I would like to think you can work on it. Take note of the good things he does, life’s too short to only pick up on the negative, start with the positive thing’s.

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Been with mine for 24 years and some of the things he does irks the hell out of me. Sometimes even the slightest things. Hell sometimes the way he breathes just bothers me. :woman_shrugging:t4::joy:

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Maybe you need a little hobby and some time to yourself?
Could you be feeling resentment? Under appreciated?

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No. It’s just you fixating on that stuff and making yourself hate it. Therapy could help

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When I have this issue I will go do something for myself for the day… and reset…

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Just tell him. I’m always shooting my man looks bc he’s chewing “wrong” :joy: …he pays attention after that. Or I’m like “I hate that shirt, I need you to not wear it ALL THE TIME” (or in your case every night to bed) and he tries. That’s all it takes for me, any sorts effort but I have to clearly express my issues first. Assuming hubs is neurotical most issues can be worked out if everyone is willing to compromise. If he’s neurodivergent then it may take a little more give on your side.

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You don’t need to be inlove in a relationship, but I feel like there’s things you need that aren’t getting and that you have grown out of the person you once we’re and need more now and what/who he is now isn’t meeting you. Not his fault but you need to talk to him not tell him to change, it’s not for you to change someone. If you can’t accept him for who he is and his not wanting to improve himself them I would have a month apart and see from there.

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I love my husband, he’s my comfort. Yet I can’t stand the way he holds his finger foods! It drives me nuts! 25 years married.

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Take a separate vacation you need a break from him and the kids . I get it

You need to talk to someone what your feeling sounds like depression/anxiety to me.

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Maybe you’ve fallen out of LIKE with your husband. It happens, just as long as you don’t fall out of LOVE. I love my husband, but sometimes I don’t like him and vice-versa. I suggest you talk to a counselor. Start there.

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Go see your Doc. You sound depressed.

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Question, how old are you? I know a few of my friends going through the same thing with their husbands and they found out they needed hormones pellets. They said life is completely different and its much more pleasant with everyday living and they don’t want to smother their husbands… They have more energy also. They are both in their 40’s.

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Also you can get over this. Sometimes when you dwell on the bad then that’s all you see. Instead try and focus on the good and how much you love him.

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I can say that this is normal, I can also say that it is the end - but, for myself, I would need more backstory and specifics. How is he as a husband? Does he help around the house and let you have your space? Do the two of you fight a lot? How much is there affection and sexy time? There’s so many questions because it can be resentment, depression, hormonal imbalances (assuming you’re of age, possibly menopause), it can be a number of things. My advice is to sit down with him and have an heart to heart talk - communicate with him and if worse comes to worse, perhaps think of personal and marriage counseling.

Darling, you need a girlfriend vacation, or a personal one. You need you time so you can miss him!

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Sound to me that it’s a “YOU” problem. Maybe it’s time to reevaluate yourself before you drag others with you. I hope you can get the help you need.

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This happens to me too sometimes lol but I just take a break for myself and I’m fine

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