I’m curious has anyone ever followed through with coal in your kid’s stocking? My kids don’t clean up, ever. I have to literally tell them all day, “put that away” I’m which they’ll move it to somewhere else it doesn’t belong. They tear my couch apart, dump bins of toys out & just leave them. They don’t even play with them. I feel like since they can’t take care of what they have, they don’t need more stuff. I think they’ll just make a mess out of coal too. Any creative ideas? I plan on giving them their Christmas gifts on Easter if they catch on.
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I think this depends on the age…
No. But I have put scripted notes that are improvement notes in their stockings. Like “be more patient”, “love your brothers and sisters more this year”. That type of thing. 
Put bows on the toys they leave out on Christmas eve and tell them thats it.
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Oh yeah, make the made up man who loves everyone, hate your children. Doesn’t sound traumatic at all
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One year we woke up to no presents (mum had kept them in her room). My brother and I had been fighting all week and we were warned that if we didn’t stop we wouldn’t get presents. My mum waited for a bit to see if we learnt the lesson before she brought the presents out. She also said that if our attitude didn’t change that next year we will get nothing as we were old enough to know better.
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I wrapped up a banana for my 5 yr. He didn’t write a letter to Santa. So he was surprised he got a present, and surprised it was a banana.
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For 100 I will dress as grinch throw the fucking tree out the window
I did as a joke 
I put coal in an iPad box and wrapped it up … afterwards i gave them their presents we all had a good laugh but yeh freaked em out at first lol
Tell them is they do not pick up - toys will be donated. Or just put bows on old stuff
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I use chocolate coals 
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No, I would never do that.
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They’re kids. That’s what they do. A perfect house isnt a home.
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For every new item they have to agree to get rid of one of their toys to charity or needy.
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I always give my kids that coal candy as a warning lol
Make them donate their toy gifts to those in need
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Do your children have actual organization? Do they have a specific place to put things when you tell them to clean up? I have 5 kids and I’ve realized a huge part of getting them to clean up is that there no actual organization. How can we tell them to clean up when they have no known place to put things? You may have to help them each night or day, whenever you do your clean up. Tell them exactly what to clean up and where to put it. It helps tremendously!! They need guidance and an example of how to take care of their things. No, don’t give them coal. Give them gifts and show them how to take care of things. It’s not easy, it can be a struggle but it is not totally the kids fault. I’ve learned this from experience!
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My cousin did last year with her 5 year old son. However, Santa brought the coal so he didn’t get anything from Santa but mom still got him a few small gifts. But absolutely nothing came from Santa
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This sounds more like a parenting issue than a child issue.
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Wow just the thought of doing that is terrible and traumatic
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My step brother did one year
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You can buy chocolate coal. I put that in my son and boyfriends stocking
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I would turn it into a constructive idea. Show them the coal. Have a letter from Santa saying that they have to sign it promising they’ll be better this year or Santa will bring them coal next year. Then give them the presents and remind them throughout the year that Santa is watching and they signed the contract.
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Pick it up or it gets donated to someone who will appreciate it. 
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Make dummy presents and toss them into a fire pit as needed.
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I want you to imagine getting coal on Christmas as a child. And if you can cope with putting your own children through that hurt to each their own.
But this is cruel. Because they’re obviously at an age to where they can understand. This will effect a child in more ways than you think. And not the ways you want/think. If you can’t talk to your children about this then that’s a parenting problem.
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I have my brothers number under Santa close to Christmas and I have had to call Santa a few times to give them a stern talking too
Hasnt 2020 been horrible enough? Everyone is going a little crazy esp kids. Keep that in mind before you enact operation grinch. Christmas gifts on easter? What??
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Nope I couldn’t do it!! It would be the only Christmas 
the child would probably remember in grate detail nah fuck that! How old are the kids?? My daughter puts her stuff back (when I tell her) she’s 7 she doesn’t put it back in the right place I do that??? Is that wrong?? No she’s a child I couldn’t do that to any child
No but did have them bag all the toys they leave on the floor and donate them to a church
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Get a “chore tote” if ya find it out of place it goes in the tote if it’s in the tote you most do a chore to get it back. If in 30 days you don’t earn it back it gets donated. Buy totes for items. Tote of cars tote for dolls and they can only get one tote out at a time. If they don’t play with a tote after awhile it gets donated.
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Always in the bottom of their stocking
Depends on their ages
I have this charcoal face bar, you could use that. Don’t think they’ll be able to make a mess of that.
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Tell them for every toy they receive for Christmas they must give one toy they have to a child in need, also put their toys away they pour out everywhere tell them they can only keep 3 toys a piece out and the rest goes in bags in storage for the time being until they can learn to clean up after themselves
I have given my son chocolate coal in his stocking a few xmases. He got the hint.
Don’t do that to your kids. Don’t ruin Christmas. But I’m all for getting rid of things they already have and don’t take care of
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When I was little my mom and aunt got my cousin a bug on a stick because he was being mean on Christmas Eve. They told him that that was what santa brought to mean little girls and boys. I can still see the look on his face. It was so funny. It was in his stocking. He did get his real stocking and his Christmas presents afterwards.
Parenting- one of the hardest yet most rewarding jobs you will ever have.
I don’t believe in punishing my children due to their behavior they have had all year or in the last days or months. Parenting is about being consistent. If they don’t clean up find a solution or consequence that works.
You won’t ever get this Christmas back with your children, but you will get more days to teach mold and create a routine and structure.
Teach them the value of their items.
I know it’s frustrating because I am far from perfect but don’t take a moment from them or yourself that you won’t ever get back.
Patience is a virtue
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I really don’t believe in ruining the spirit of Christmas for children or their childhood holiday memories. Children were not born miniature adults yet they are held to higher standards than most adults. Don’t be tired. Dont ever feel lazy. Don’t ever get emotional or lose your temper. I mean really? You might want to stop and think because this entire post was written off your emotions and frustration that they aren’t allowed to have. Just saying. And yes I have kids. Yes they are not perfect. Yes im educated. Yes ive taught preschool. And yes my kids will have Christmas no matter what.
This year has been hard on everyone!!! Just something to think about!!!
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Yes! But Candy coal… as a gag… in the bottom of everyone’s stocking. Only an asshole would put actual coal in their child’s stocking.
Call santa and make it known that he’s watching and only brings presents to good boys and girls
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Just add a piece of coal in one of the toys or stockings
Give them the coal. People always wanna say different things. Who wants to clean more stuff. HOPEFULLY they get it
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Isn’t that normal? I have 3 kids (2, 5 & 9) and I’m cleaning up after them all day! Kids make messes, and they don’t like to pick up i don’t think I know a single kid that picks up their toys without being asked about 20 times a day.
I wouldn’t ruin Christmas for them over something like that, thats just cruel…
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This depends on their age. I’ve started a time out box for my 5 year old presents because I asked her to pick up and she threw a fit. Then threw a fit because she wanted them out of the time out box before she picked up. I told her it didn’t work out that way.
If they don’t clean up ever, why just punish them on christmas. 2020 sucks for everyone, especially kids.
If they still believe in santa, let them have a solid joy. You have the rest of forever to tell them no toys. Don’t be a scrooge. Give your babies joy!
on this one special day
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You could give them the “coal” a day or two before Christmas and say that Santa delivers coal earlier than presents and explain to them why they got that instead of gifts. Give them a couple days and see if they turn it around and on Christmas do their gifts and have a note from Santa thanking them for turning their behavior around and next year he hopes it’s more than just a couple days. Or if you put gifts from you or dad or whoever under the tree, wrap some empty boxes to go along with them and when they act up, throw one in the fire or trash.
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Sounds like you need to get them in line.
Teach them, even if you have to do it over and over again.
You’re the adult. You are supposed to run your household, not the kids.
I don’t think I would just give them coal and no presents.
If you don’t set your expectations out, clearly, and then the consequences, and you don’t stick to them, you can’t be upset when they kids don’t do what they are told.
I have put bags of “coal” in their stockings, but it was gum, or chocolate.
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As a mother of 6, I get your frustration. I play referee, repeat myself atleast 100 times, I have to tell them to clean up, etc. Etc. I wouldn’t take their Christmas away from them. Maybe wrap a piece a coal up for each of them before giving them their presents to get your point across.
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We do coal, but it’s in their stockings and they still get a normal gift along with it
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No way am I’m shattering my child’s heart for bad behavior that I’ve allowed. My kids are hooligans some days and some days they are not. But the more I’m consistent with them, the more consistent they become.
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We got a charcoal bag and put their gift in it.
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I got my kids coal. They’re bath bombs though 
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yep, it was chocolate flavored
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This might help temporarily but I don’t believe it will get you the long term results you’re wanting to see.
First because in feburary kids dont care about santa or Christmas. This threat is only good 2-3 months a year. Doesn’t help you the rest of the time, you need to find a system that works all year long.
Second, because its not constructive in any way. Punishments can be constructive if done correctly, but this isnt it.
Third, because part of what you’re punishing is child behavior. No kid likes to pick up. They all have to be reminded and all kids make messes.
If it were me (and it has been) I would let them open the new presents but put them away until the children do thier chores and earn them back.
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Well for starters, they’re kids THAT IS WHAT CHILDREN DO. Find a different punishment. Take the toys for a day or something but dont break their little hearts.
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Lol call me awful I wanna give her a small bit just to see how she would react she still is gonna get plenty
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My gram gave my uncle coal one year back when they were kids. My mom told me they had a bucket of coal under the tree for him and let him think he didn’t get anything for awhile then towards the end of the day gave him his presents.
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Tell them “if you dont put it up where it belongs and I do it then you wont have it to play with anymore” and if they leave the stuff then take it and put it away.
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I think it’s not a way to deal with the problem. Maybe try family counseling…but Christmas is a time for joy and children especially this year deserve joy and happiness.
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There’s chocolate that’s wrapped in foil to look like coal. 
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It’s ok to not give your kids a dozen toys for xmas.
But to give them coal because they’re messy seems… wrong.
Kids are messy but they’ll do what they can get away with. If they leave their shit around throw it away. Or put it in your closet for 2 weeks. YOU HAVE TO TEACH THEM.
Honestly I’m seriously considering this. Not the coal part, but just cancelling Christmas all together. I’ve already cancelled Easter and Halloween this year due to the kids shitty behaviour and they don’t seem to get the point and keep being brats on purpose. If they don’t care, why should I?
Toys on floor become trash here… you could hide them and make them work to earn back. They gonna be bored if they continue to be lazy … if it is something we knlw theyll earn back wr hide… small shit we toss if we think they wont carem there loss they know rules… esp my 7yeR old .
Mom gave us switches a few times!
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Do a present jail make them take a present to the box if they don’t listen and they have to do 3 good deeds to get it back under the tree
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My parents gave me coal as a kid… Traumatized the hell outta me. They videotaped me… Though it was halarious. Don’t do it
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I gave my brother coal once 
As a child who received nothing but coal one year and not because of being naughty it is damaging to a child 
Don’t do it. Find another way to discipline
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Ruin Christmas magic cuz I’m slacking on my parenting ? Naw never that. I turn on the cleanup song and help him get started for motivation, he usually finishes with no hesitation.
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I’m the youngest of 6, I’m 49. One year my parents (dad’s idea) gave us all logs and coal for Christmas as a joke. They had hidden our gifts throughout the house for us to find. *I was a tween and my 5 siblings were all in mid to late teens. It’s funny.
I would never seriously give my kids logs or coal for Christmas. That’s just mean.
Parenting is not hurting you children… but you also need to be firm all year round. I have literally cleaned every town out of my kids rooms and had them buy them back with chore money… but one day a year they are excited about would be heart breaking to get nothing… try the present jail. You win and they win they help clean and you are teaching them a lesson to…
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They’re kids … kids take forever to pick up toys. It’s disgusting that you wanna ruin a happy because you’re tired of picking up some toys 
. Really sound like a you problem and not a kid problem
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I ran in home child care for six years. My kiddos (birth to 5) were taught to pick up toys routinely as soon as they were old enough to walk, before lunch/nap, and before going home. Whether they liked it or not 
At first, I would walk behind them, holding their hands, “helping” them pick up toys and put them in the proper place. Many times they would be screaming their heads off lol 
BUT I was always happy and upbeat the entire time, while me and my regular kiddos sang The Clean Up Song AND I would ALWAYS thank them afterwards. They quickly learned it was just something that they did every day, and they knew they really didn’t have a choice LOL 
Their parents always said they couldn’t understand why they wouldn’t pick up at home or take a nap LOL
“What you allow, WILL continue”
If you don’t establish rules and expectations and consequences from the very get-go, you can’t punish them for not doing what you want around the holidays.
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I started a choir chart and they get money at the end of the week if the choirs are done if not no money make them pick up there own toys and clean up after there self. If to young to know what money is for give a special treat or have a movie night or something fun as a reward for doing chores
Carla French. You gave me coal when I turned 20
No Christmas is not a time for punishment.
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I did let my kids wake up to no presents one year. They got a note from Santa saying “they had to learn to listen to be on the nice list.” Later that day, the presents magically appeared with a note from Santa saying he decided to give them another chance…
Looking back, their behavior was because I didn’t have rules in place and the rules I did have I didn’t enforce. I still have that problem 
however, most of my kids do have jobs now(teenagers) and in school so I’m not as uptight about cleaning after them.
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I love the idea of Toy Jail. Make a box that says toy jail, put a lock on it if you have to. Any toys left out get put in toy jail and the kids can only earn them back once they do a chore. Every offense requires a stricter chore and only one chore a day can get the toy of their choice back.
Hehe my dad did this one year!! We were both unimpressed but also oddly impressed at the same time lol how often does a kid actually get to see real coal? Well safe to say my siblings and myself did after I tried to say there was no such thing where we lived
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And this when people need to start teaching their kids about krampus too. Not just good old saint Nick who rewards good kids…
I don’t know if a single parent who doesn’t have to tell their kids over and over to put their crap away. It doesn’t make them bad kids… they are kids and that’s what they do. Nothing good will come of giving your kids coal… I’d maybe scale down in what you would normally buy them or maybe not buy any more toys if they have too many already.
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Yes, a friend of mine gave her 3yr old coal bc he had set a bed on fire, he took the coal and made mountains for his army men, didn’t phase him, but he was only 3
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Sounds more like a disciple problem. You need to get your act straight. You’ve allowed this behavior more than enough. It is what they are used to.
Dont ruin a cheerful holiday because you allowed your kids to get this way.
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Depends on how old your kids are lol. Doesn’t seem like ruining Christmas is the solution here though
Got them the real stuff one year. Candy coal for sure.
My mother was a narcissistic manipulative selfish woman, and gave me coal one year as punishment for my bio-dad not paying his child support.
My younger sister’s father never paid, but she received a MacBook . Will never forget that Christmas .
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It’s normal for them to make messes all day. Especially since mine are remote learning and hardly ever leave the house. I have twin 8 year olds (boy and girl). They tear my living room up, never pick up, their rooms are disasters. I told them they will only be getting clothes for Xmas since they need them and don’t play with toys (they got iPads last year).
This year we bought them new mattresses, sleds, gloves, a book each, clothes and a board game and that’s all they will get because they don’t use or take care of anything they have except the ipads. We went big last year and this year will be the opposite.
I
Ummmm. Ya no. Your kids are being kids. Mine do that crap aaaallllll the tiiiiimmmeee. And guess what? They are still getting presents. Why? Because I love them and they really are beautiful miracles I made and my life would be empty and meaningless without them. They are my reason for breathing even when they torment me to the point I’m ready to sell them to the circus. Get them gifts. They don’t have to be big and plentiful. But get them something.
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Yeah if you figure that out let the rest of us moms know. All day everyday it is constantly pick up this or that put away this and that. No matter what I do doesn’t stop nor change. Good luck!
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I raised 6 (in 9 yrs ) they cleaned up And. haw about a potato as well as coal and maybe a carrot
Y’all should practice the clean up game more often 
Is your system easy for the children to clean up on their own? Maybe revise a little?
Also, I saw an elf on the shelf idea where the elf asked for unwanted toys to give other children?
Best of luck!
I make my 3 and a half and 8 year old pick their toys up and put them away at the end of each day as I’m usually doing dinner when I ask them, they know if they don’t they will either lose whatever toys I find left on the floor or they pick them up and get to keep them.
Only started doing this because they ended up with toys that hurt like stepping on lego when left out on the floor
I hope you are joking. Sounds like you have normal kiddos.
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No, not yet lol…but i did see a bag of “coal” chocolates
Yeah my mom would get a trash bag and start cleaning the crap up herself if she told is repeatedly to pick it up and we didn’t, I think it took one time of our stuff getting trashed to realize when she said pick it up we better get it done if we want to keep it.
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I got coal shaped gum one year
take away any toy you have to clean up. Tell them it’s gone for a week because they didn’t take care of it. Also, try making it fun or goofy to clean. Turn on some music and dance with them while everyone cleans. When a task is dreaded, even adults don’t want to do them. Try to make it fun. I used to give my daughter a time limit to do a certain task in her room (pick up clothes, pick up one area) and then she tried to beat the clock. But there are still days I just have to say stop what you’re doing and pick up the mess.
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We use to get a potatoe