Well he’s made his intentions known and you already have kids so maybe he feels that you have enough already. Do you involve your BF in all your birth control options? I’m impressed that he got a vasectomy . I wish more men would but you need to ask HIM n what he thinks and what he needs. Otherwise he told you what he wants.
2 Likes
You should stop thinking of making babies its not a guarantee to have your man for life. Ot fair for children to be born and just become accessories
2 Likes
Probs cheating and that’s why he hid it to see if you are too then be able to say well I got the snip so not mine and then make out your the reason for the break up all while he was playing away
Just what av seen happen to people I know
I hope not
1 Like
It sounds like he is done with having children and took responsibility for his part. You don’t have a say in his personal medical choices. The same as him not having a say in whether you use BC in some form. You don’t mention even living together or plans for the future either. So do you want to dump your BF or not over being responsible for himself?
5 Likes
I would wonder what else he wasnt telling me and roll on.
4 Likes
How did he even pull that off?
its his penis and his choice just like it was your choice to have 2 kids women always want the my body my choice the same applies to him , him not wanting more is not a reflection on you or your relationship it is a reflection on his own responsibility to not bring more children in to the world he maybe cant afford but knows he doesnt want
Once you said boyfriend and years I was done…
7 Likes
You don’t need more kids THEY GROW UP and are not cute anymore they talk back They eat a LOT. There pigs all through the house they won’t help they get in trouble We gave the kids our old car well kept up in two weeks the fender was smashed in What happened to the car. They just laugh. Then the other one a single mom I fought with my husband to give her a car she’s in the car with her cousin and had a wreck totaled the car she just laughed I had to hear it from my husband for days. Was not funny for me
1 Like
Isn’t that some 
that guy’s can get whatever procedure done but women can’t get their tubes tied without permission. I would be upset too that it wasn’t a discussion. It effects your future together so imo it’s something that needed to be talked about before.
5 Likes
His body his choice don’t like it move on.
7 Likes
He doesn’t want anymore kids. It’s that simple. Yes he should have talked to you first. But you can’t force him to have more children. Just like he can’t force you to not have anymore. Just because you are a woman doesn’t mean you get to make this choice alone. It doesn’t mean he’s cheating or hiding anything else. He probably knew you wouldn’t be ok with it. Lying is never ok but it is his choice in the end. If you want more children and you’re willing to lose him to do that then that is your choice too.
7 Likes
If you want more kids then you might as well end it now. That’s something that obviously should’ve been discussed.
5 Likes
I think in a relationship those type of important decisions should be discussed. Doesn’t matter if one person is set in stone on their decision, your in a relationship. Communication is important. I wonder why he did it behind your back. Did he tell you ir did you find out? Hmmm
5 Likes
My grandma always said in a relationship you have to choose the hill you wanna die on which means that you are willing to leave the other person over this issue because it means that much to you. If you truly want more children and it is that important to you then leave him and find someone who feels the same way.
1 Like
Leave him. That is a huge thing to lie about and not include you on. 
1 Like
Be glad you have children
It’s not the worst thing, but not the best thing when he did it with out at least letting you know that he was going to do that, idk sit and have a talk with him maybe he can make you understand more to why he felt like he had to do that behind your back. Don’t be so quick to be upset at him he haves his own reasons to why he doesn’t want more kids, just like you have your reasons for wanting more kids , don’t let this ruin your relationship it’s not worth it…
I honestly do not know how he managed to hide the fact he got the operation done!!
Wow so many people in these comments not getting the point. Yes his body his choice. But who goes behind someone’s back with something like this?. THAT is the issue. TRUST IS A MUST
4 Likes
If you want more children, it’s time to move on. Also, maybe there’s an ulterior motive. Maybe he didn’t want babies and baby mamas all over town. Something is definitely not right.
1 Like
My ex husband did the same thing . I wasn’t sure whether I wanted more children but I was 100% sure I would not be with a man would would make a life changing decision that affects me and not discuss it with me. It showed a clear lack of care factor for me, my feelings and my value to him as my thoughts on this decision did not matter enough for him to even tell me he had booked it in.
3 Likes
If he never told you that is really selfish and zero respect
Probably should’ve discussed it earlier if you wanted more kids. 
what’s done is done. Get on with life.
Clearly yous don’t communicate the way people should in a relationship for him to go and get that done without even speaking with you first, he maybe could of put it as he was telling you he was doing it and nothing was going to change his mind, yous definitely need to work on communication it’s key in a relationship.
1 Like
Y’all have got to communicate. If he doesn’t want more kids, he doesn’t want more kids and you cannot change that. Same if the roles were reversed and you had gotten your tubes tied after the last delivery or if you just decided you don’t want more. I think he should have talked to you about it, not kept it a secret but what’s done is now done and y’all need to figure out if you can move past it. If you truly want more kids, you’ll have to move on.
1 Like
Call me old school, but she said boyfriend.
Dating is a precursor to marriage.
Yeah you have a child but if you don’t see yourself spending your life together (no, you do not have to be married to be happy and spend a life with someone)
But he is a grown man that can make his own choices.
Yeah he should have at least told you he was getting the procedure done but he probably didn’t want a fight and a guilt trip.
It tells me he might not be comfortable talking to you about these things.
1 Like
It’s just like birth control a lot of y’all ain’t on it and if the man ask women lie ion understand why y’all so mad
2 Likes
His body, his choice.
9 Likes
He can get it reversed
Same saying applies to men too. His body, his choice. He doesn’t need your permission to do that. Now yes, it would’ve been respectful for him to mention it before hand because y’all are still in a relationship but at the same time you’re not married. That’s my take on it. If you personally want more kids move on and make sure you communicate your want for more children with your next potential partner.
4 Likes
He doesn’t need your permission to do what he wants with his body. If he doesn’t want more kids then you should respect that. If you seriously want to leave him over that, you don’t really love him like you should. Dating is suppose to be with the intentions of marriage, in my opinion. But to each his own.
8 Likes
You answered your own question. If he doesn’t want more kids, and you do, then you should break it off with him and find a new relationship with someone who wants to have as many children as you do. Simple. He has made it clear that he just wants to be a “baby daddy.” Why keep wasting your time and energy? You can’t convince him or make him change his mind, but you can change your situation and who you make your future with. Good luck.
Be happy with the 2 have lots of people can’t have any kids.
3 Likes
His body his choice your body your choice. If you want more babies go find someone else to have them with. He didn’t respect or care about your thoughts or feelings so why should you do the same for him. Find someone else to make you happy with more kids or learn to living with someone like that.
3 Likes
That is absolutely something he should have discussed with you… even if the discussion was just to tell you that he already made up his mind and was 100% going through with it no matter what. That is sneaky and shows a complete disregard for your feelings. Ask him how he would feel if you wiped out your joint life savings to buy a car for yourself without even discussing it with him. Even that isn’t equivalent to what he did because you could always save more money, but a vasectomy is very final. Even a reversal is only 50% effective. There’s no gaurantee, not to mention it cost a lot of money out of pocket… I have 2 kids and am a single mother and I want one more baby with the man I am going to marry one day. I won’t even date a man if he is dead set against having another baby unless he is Mr. PERFECT in every other way. Having kids or not having kids isn’t exactly something you can compromise on where both partners feel ok with the situation… you either have them or you don’t. Honestly I wouldn’t blame you if you left over that…
7 Likes
Pack up your kids and leave then? He doesn’t want anymore. If you do, then move on.
“My body, my choice” applies to men also. However I agree in a relationship you should discuss things before doing them. When I had my last child I asked the Dr to tie my tubes. The Dr also needed my husband permission which is BS, but my husband is ok with the fact that it’s my body my choice. They asked my husband several times and every time I said it’s my body, my choice stop asking him he already told you it was my body, it’s not his decision. Either way, my point is, my husband and I discussed this well before it happened. I can understand you being upset but look at the world right now, do you really want to be bringing in more human beings??? Talk to him, understand his reasoning before you up and move onto a new baby daddy. Do not take some of these peoples advice and move onto the next guy just because you want more kids. That is the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard.
5 Likes
Wow but if it was a female everyone would’ve backed her up saying it’s your body etc etc we’ll it’s his body and he’s choice
2 Likes
If he doesn’t want any more kids and you absolutely know for a fact you do, that’s the answer y’all aren’t meant to go further in less you can give up the want for more kids. It’s his body and since y’all aren’t married he can do what he wants to do without consulting you or anyone and same thing would apply if the roles were reversed! Have a conversation and stand firm with what you want then make the hard decisions that stand in the way of what you want
I would be angry. As a woman you would not be able to just make that decision. Everyone would be pressuring you to wait but a man can just make an appointment and it’s no questions asked. The good news is it can be reversed if you both decide you want another child.
His body his choice. Until you have balls you have no say.
Yes he should have talk to you.but if he’s doesn’t want anymore that’s his choice.i only had two kids but told my husband I didn’t want anymore kid’s and he wanted one more . But I didn’t budge and we where together for 38 years before he passed away in 2015 that was mine choice and he respected it .
1 Like
In my opinion he should have spoken to you BUT a vasectomy can be reversed. So children in the future could still be a option. Younger men have decided to get vasectomies until they were ready to have children. Because again it can be reversed. He may not be open to more children right now but that could change. Good luck and prayers y’all work it out!! God bless 
1 Like
You should have communicated, I suggest some therapy, my hubby was determined to get a vasectomy and I honestly didn’t wanna be done but imrespect his reasons for doing it, I’ve grieved what I won’t have but I’m.loving what I do have, we just have 2 lil ones , honestly if it’s a deal breaker you need to say so, but you could be throwing away one thing for another, communicate , get a baby animal, you could even Foster
Like it’s ur body ur choice same goes for him and like u he can do whatever he wants to it without ur permission!!!
Y’all aren’t married and what he did gave you your answer.
Everybody saying “His body, his choice” is amusing.
Y’all would be upset that he didn’t respect you enough to discuss it. 
I’d have issues if my husband did that without a discussion…but that’s why so many just “date”. No real committed relationship does something that drastic without a conversation. He made a decision for her. If this was reversed y’all would be ticked. Smh
He should have talked to you about it. It’s such a huge decision. That he went and made without you. I would be really shocked and hurt.
Your future is him making decisions without talking to you for you I think it’s time to take a deep Long look at your relationship you might want to start packing
Women choose to have abortions, to not have any more kids, etc and 90% of the time a man does not have a say because it is deemed sexist and claimed to be “controlling” of the females body. Not saying this is okay by amy means because communication is definitely needed but I see both ends of this argument. He didnt want any more kids. No shame in that. If he had not gotten a vasectomy when he had, she would have likely convinced him to have more kids due to it being “her choice too” and left him in misery. There is always two sides.
1 Like
It’s his future too. I can understand why he did it. Maybe 1 is enough for him
3 Likes
Hes made a wise decision. You have 2kids. Raising one child is a handful these days.Providing for them and giving them a good university education is also an arduous task.
2 Likes
His body, his choice.
Can’t really trust him going behind your back and doing what he did, what else is he hiding? Leave him