My boyfriend has one kid and is gonna be a dad to 2 more (twins not with me ), and I have a kid by my previous relationship, so my question is now that he has two more babies coming how do I be happy for him and help raise them as my own while letting my dream go of having more of my own?
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Why does that mean you will not have any more?
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If heās having twins by someone else, Iām assuming you havenāt been together long at all. Itās way to early to be thinking about playing step mum. Donāt give up your hopes on more children of your own as this relationship may not work, even if it does, why canāt you have more of your own?
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If he just had twin babies then you guys clearly got together not that long agoā¦ maybe he isnt for you? If he doesnāt want anymore kids passed those ones and you want more than maybe you should get out this relationship. You havenāt been in it for long so this would be the time in my opinion.
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Find another boyfriend. Did he get that girl pregnant while you were togther
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Run before he knocks you up too 
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Why would u be raising them as ur own? Dont they have a mum? 2 me this is all too soon.
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I hope you realize the babies are not here yet. So why are you with someone for a short period of time and planning your entire life with him when there is way more to come. Did he cheat on you? Got another girl pregnant? Did he cheat on her with you while she is pregnant? I would stay far away from a man that is having babies with another women there relationship isnāt done . Your going to get hurt
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Well 1. Why did he leave the mom pregnant with the twins? 2. Its to early to think about that,as you dont know him very well yet. 3. Wait and see what kind of dad he is to the twins and that will show u if u really want kids with this man or not as he could be a shitty dad.
Why are you.i in a relationship with someone who has a pregnant ex? You knew what you were getting into
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Why would you be letting your dream go of having more? Iām confused.
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As a woman who was cheated on while pregnant with twins, walk away. That girl thought he was her boyfriend too. What she didnāt know is HE wasnāt done with US. Once my babies were born and I talked to him again we were a family.
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Whatās stopping you from having more of your own??
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We need more info 
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Gurlā¦ Iāll let the pros handle this one Ayiiii!
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In my opinion if ANYONE is getting ready to expect children, that is NOT the time to go out and date or try to build a new family. There is a lot of unresolved emotions/situations that are going to arise while this man tries to co-parent with the mother and itās not going to help anyoneās case for a āstep momā to walk into the picture. This is a time for them all, you included, to do some soul searching and look inward. It may work for some people to jump into things at any random given time, but not likely chances. I feel like this is a far fetched goal/relationship you have.
I assume you canāt have children anymore if you say you wonāt be having more? If so, Iām sorry. Children are such a blessing. Sounds like you know the answers youāre asking and the answer is you canāt find a way around this, a way to be ok with raising babies that arenāt yours, with a man expecting twins while you are mourning the loss of your hopes of more children of your own. If you do choose to take ALL that on then you have to make some huge sacrifices and live with those, live in your own disappointment and not being able to blame anyone but yourself for being in that situation. Harsh, I know.
There arenāt short cuts to these things. I say get out and look for what really makes YOU happy. Not the comfort and routine of having someone to be with. Thereās always more to a story, based on the information you gaveā¦ I wish you the best of luck.
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Huh there is way to many plot holes in this story have yāall only been toghther for less then 9 months ā¦ And your worried about babys?. Why canāt you have more? Whatās stopping you.
Did he cheat?
Lots of whatās
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If you get pregnant by him he is going to leave you too. So you need to think twice before its to late. You could be raising a baby by yourself.
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Iām sorry u need a new boyfriend - preferably one whoās nuetered
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Get out of that situation RIGHT now ā¦
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If your it to be with him donāt dwell on them not being yours and love them like they are.
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Oh man. What. In. The. Heck. He got twins on the way?!? Ummm how long have you been together??? And his first kidā¦ I sure hope itās with the same girl having these twins. If not. You need to let this kid go. Move on. He already has TOOO MUCH baggage regardless of the situation! 
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This got my head spinning.
Girl it is way too soon for you to be thinking that way. Take it slow. Heās about to be spending lots of time with his ex and his new babies. Anything, and I mean anything, could happen.
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Some people are extra special in this worldā¦
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I would leave. Babymomma is gonna be relying on him, especially with twins.
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Probably should of thought about that before you got serious with him. If you want to be with him you have to except his kids including these two lil babies. And be prepared to be step mum to them. This does not mean you wont have one of your own together just maybe not right now as well he has two on the way
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Why does someone else having his kid mean that you canāt have anymore?
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Ummmm I feel like maybe he should be held at a safe distanceā¦
Heās expecting not just one baby but two. That means that A: unless he cheated on you, yāall have been together less than 9 months. Far too short a time to assume yāall would be together forever.
B: instead of preparing for the TWINS heās having, heās out dating. To me, that means his priorities are way out of whack.
C: babies are a lot. You know this. If your relationship is still green, him being an active father to his new babies is going to put a huge strain on your relationship that will be too much to get through.
My advice? Hard to say without all the info and I feel like thereās been some serious omission here. If it were me, though, Iād bounce. Thatās too much too soon and doesnāt sound worth the stress or heartbreak.
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Iām gonna need more info before I can offer any advice.
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How long have you both been together for? Why would you want to raise someone elseās kid for what seems like a brand new relationship. Let him DEAL with the BM first, as there will be alot of learning curves for all parties involved.
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Honey slow it down please!!! Youāre with him now? He has twins on the way by a different woman? Just STOP! See where yāall are in 5yrs, see what kind of father/provider he is to those other babiesā:woman_shrugging: Meanwhile you can love his kids as your own! Kids need love from everyone involved in their lives. If heās a stand up man and dad? Youāll see it, but please donāt think you need to add another child just keep himā:pray:
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Iām confused why cant you have anymore?? If hes got 2 on the way with another woman then you cant have been together longā¦ why are you planning a life around him alreadyā¦ if your happy with him then you will have to accept his children and also accept that their mother will always be in your boyfriends life as he has children with herā¦ when getting with someone who has children the first thing you need to realise and understand is that the ex who is the mother of his children will always be roundā¦ do some soul searching and think about what you want that makes you happyā¦
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You dont have to give up on your dream. You can have kids whenever you want. It just may not be with him. Since he has twins on the way, it probably shouldnāt be with him js
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If the girl is pregnant that means it likely hasnāt been that long ā¦ wait . Yāall donāt need kids yāall just got together 
another thing is if you got with him knowing he had kids on the way good luck you sound childish enough to eventually say he dosent pay attention to you and all that crap
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You can have more I donāt see why not probably just wait a bit til his are a little biggerā¦ itās a mutual agreement
The fact that you are even questioning this is your answer.
Do not subject his children to a stepmother who cannot parent them as she would her own.
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Sounds like this is a fairly new relationship. Donāt be naive . His baby momms are probably not be that civil. Stop rushing bc you will end up getting hurt.
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Girl either slow downā¦or let him go.
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I think youāve put the cart before the horse.
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You are very ignorant!
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Wait what? How long have you been with him? Why is he not with the mother? Twins is a big deal. Either he cheated on you or your relationship is super new, in which case I would honestly exit the relationship. Seems like he has his hands full. And if he doesnāt wanna have more kids but you do thatās a deal breaker right there so maybe he isnāt the one for you? 
Like maybe leave before it gets even more messy than it already sounds? And like it sounds pretty friggin messyā¦
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The frick did I just read 
what is wrong with some females
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They arenāt your kids to parent. They have 2 bio parents already
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Leave all bad plus sounds like itāll end in resentment towards the children so leave
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I canāt even comment too much is wrong with this whole senerio!
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The question is did you know he ex was having twins when you got with him? If so, you shouldāve thought of that before you made a commitment with him. Unless you are fixed, I dont see why it canāt be a possibility in the future for you and him to have more.
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I,ll run like hellā¦awayā¦holy mackerel girl,ur setting urself up for heartbreak!!
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Noooooo!!! Heās your boyfriend! Run girl! Wait for the right one! There is Sooooo much information missing. What can be said ā¦
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If you have to give up a dream just for a man, you are gonna end up regretting it. Go find someone that wants to achieve dreams with you
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First offā¦what the what?! Second what does him having twins on the way have to do with you not having more unless you have had your tubes tied or hysterectomy or he got a vasectomy after impregnating the other person? Just because you both have kids doesnāt mean you canāt have more. Iām so confusedā¦
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Give it time, he probably wonāt be your bf for very long
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What in the red neck hell, just go
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Run before he gets u pregnant
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Iām assuming he got the girl knocked up prior to you datingā¦ so this is a new relationship? Youāre committing too hard too fast.
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He has 2 babies on te way, and youāre bugging him for more? You canāt have been together long enough yet for you to even be serious. What in the trailer park is going on here???
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My boyfriend has 2 children by another woman, and I have one by someone else, and I 1000% want more. If he didnāt want one by me, I couldnāt be with him. I wanted more than 2 children, but between us we have 3 so weāre having 1 of our own in the future, sometimes compromises is all it takes. If you want another baby, and he doesnāt want one with you then you aināt gonna be happy with him. As for the twins, encourage him to be there as much as poss, itās gonna be hard but those kids need their dad x
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Girl how old are you?Youāre with a guy having babies with another girl,and yet you want a baby too.Where is the money to support all these kids going to come from?
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Ya donāt. You only live once. If itās something you truly want then why should you lose out on your dream?
Gilr if you have doubts now your wonāt be happy I would wait heās literally having two babyās now while your together look outside the box and seeing this situation Iām sure you would see itās a bad idea and walk away now
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Um nope. Thatās a no for me. Iām so sorry. Iād be out. Thatās not something you can compromise on
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No one can really help you with this babe, this is solely your choice to stay with him and raise his kids
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Heās about to have two more babies?? How long have you been with him Iām guessing not long at allā¦ since itās 9 months for pregnancy. And you already want more with a man who has three and two of them are not even here yet??? Iām so confused 
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So heās going to be a dad to twins, which means you havenāt even been dating for 9 monthsā¦ youāre already wanting kids with the dude?
Hahahaha
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Heās going to be real broke if she takes him for child support . Twins cost a lot .
Leave him, for his own good. Youre only gonna hurt him by being so selfish 
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Giiiiirl! You may think this man is the one but this has RED FLAGS ALL. OVER. THIS! You will find someone else and be great. This situation is just something you just have to walk away from now. You can tell his man does not have his shit together. Plus you want to have more kids. I hope you make the best decision for you. Good luck. 
Ruuuuun Forrest ruuuuun
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Wht the fuck are you with someone whoās having babies! Get the fuck outta there! Let THEM try to work on things and be a family
This question does not make sense to me.
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You really want to be the THIRD Baby mother?!
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Donāt let your dream of having more kids go, just find somebody who isnāt giving those kids to everyone with two feet and a heartbeat. You guys obviously havenāt been together that long, unless he cheated and knocked this chick up. It sounds harsh, but the consequences are few for the happiness youāll gain with finding someone who can actually invest time and love into you and your little one
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So twins not with you?
Honey you gotta make that choice yourself. But for the sake of those babies. Please make it before they get here and form any attachments. Neither choice is wrong or right. Be true to you.
What the hell.he having twins on the way with another woman and has another child and you want another child. Sorry but I would be running the other way. Sounds like you got with him after he got another girl pregnant. Why isnāt he with the mother of his twins. Do these 3 kids have the same mother or is he just having fun getting women pregnant
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My God ye all so harsh and judgemental!! You dont the the full story behind the door so dont be 2 quick to judge ā¦ all this girl is asking for is opinion s not criticism!!
I understand this situation girl itās one Iām in myself only no babies on the way I love the guy I have 1 age 6 he has 3 all grown up from previous relationships I want one more he doesnt Iām in fear of regretting it when Iām older if I give up on it and stay coz I really dont wana leave I love him so I cant offer you advice or opinion all I can say is I understand although diffrent situations I do understand wat ur feeling somewhat I know if I was in your shoes with twins on the way for him Iād be very resentful even more so Iād have to tell him I feel like that and maybe ask him to let you go so he can give u a chance to meet someone else as resentful of 2 beautiful babies will be so hard to handle for me as Iād feel so guilty
The question you really should or should have made is, why did you get in a relationship with him knowing he has kids on the way? That means he was in a relationship beforehand and then hurried into another. If yāall would have thought about it before rushing in you wouldnāt have this question. Too many things are left out of this question to really form an answer for you. Sounds like this is a new relationship and you are taking on a task that isnāt meant for a new girlfriend. Raising the twins as your own once they are born? Youāre asking for drama.
Um yeah no. Tons of red flags run away. Heās with you and having twins with someone else? What happens if he accidentally knocks you up? Do you think he will stay? Heās already got other kids and heās not with those mamas
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Please clarify your thoughts. Were you together and he got other women pregnant? Did he get into a relationship with you that soon after having the twins?
It sounds like he is bed hopping. I wouldnāt want children with him. He doesnāt sound stable. If thatās true what can he offer you and another baby? It sounds to me that he will move on in the very near future without you.
Really, people shouldnāt get into another relationship for at least a year. The dust must settle first.
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You canāt have children? I canāt figure what the timeline is with the twins. How long have you been with him? Short time? I canāt follow your post to give advice. Good luck I guess.
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Get another boyfriend
Question is why did you get with someone who already has kids on the way with another woman? Especially if you knew you couldnt have kids yourself. There are more questions Iād ask then answers to give in this post. The situation is not fully explained so itās kinda hard to give any good advice here.
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The only problem here is one you have created all by yourself. Eyeās wide open for next time honey.
Your boyfriend is having kids with someone else?
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If your boyfriend is having kids with someone else he either cheated or moves on way too fast donāt sound like a very good boyfriendā¦ Youāll be fine Iām sure he wonāt stay much longer 
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Ummm I think you have deeper issues to deal with here
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Do what? Iām confused !! Honey if your boyfriend is having kids with other women donāt ya think ya might wanna pack a bag and walk out the door? I mean thats just asking for a life of hell
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Sounds messy and like you guys havenāt been together long. He sounds messy tbh. Dude needs to pull his head out of his ass and stop sleeping with random girls, I hate to say it but youāre a rebound. Take your child and RUN! Itās better to be single than deal with all that. 
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They will become yours in no time once they are born
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I think you need to find a new boyfriend 
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So basically, your boyfriend got a woman pregnant less than 9 months ago??? I donāt think you should be committing to ANYTHING with this guy, and you certainly shouldnāt be raising his kids.
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Sounds like too much bullshit on his part. Run fast and far!
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If heās got kids on way itās obviously a very new relationship,ie under nine months.You know heās no longer with any of his kids motherās and yet here you are already thinking about babies?Seriously where your brains at girlš¤·
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Throw the whole man out. He shouldnāt be with you this soon if heās having twins and they arenāt born yet. I donāt care why heās not with the baby mama thereās no excuse.
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Wait whatā¦?? So he was cheating or you don t know each other very longā¦ ? Why are you even considering more kidsā¦ just donāt. It doesn t sound very healthy for anybody
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Umā¦ his your BOYFRIEND! NOT your HUSBAND!
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Iām guessing this is a newer relationship? As in, he just left a relationship and is now with you. Seeing as the ex is still pregnant. Correct me if Iām wrong?
My opinion on that is donāt have kids with this kid. Unless he shows heās actually taking care of the other children. I mean, highly unlikely heās going to be happy or stay if you throw more children his way. He has one child, two on the way, and youāre provably expecting him to treat your child like his own. I mean, your relationship doesnāt sound too seriousā¦and no offence, but I wouldnāt be making plans for the future or having babies with this kid. Get you a man who didnāt go and impregnant half the block already?
I think you should end this now before his kids are born. Sounds like a shit show. Love yourself and get a man whoās NOT having two kids with the another damn woman. Wow.
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Iād be finding a single man with less commitments he seems be sleeping with a few. Woman very quickly does not sound stable or Father material to be honest.
Good luck
How on earth is he going to pay for all these kids let alone more?!?! Iād love to say dump him and find someone who hasnāt already got kids by some one else and is willing to support you and your kid but tbh your better of being independent with your kid worry about yourself and your kid !
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Donāt be involved in that mess value yourself. Know your worth.
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