Personally I would say no. Focus on yalls marriage, the last thing that should be on his mind is what SHE AND HER SPOUSE have going on. Whats in the past is there for a reason. Let it be
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I was always told not to worry about what goes on under someone else’s roof. He really should be focusing all of his energy on you, your marriage and your family.
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Wtf he want to tell the husband? Sounds to me like he’s trying to break up that marriage so he can end yours. Js
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I’m sorry bit I’d leave my husband. To me of any mam does that he has zero respect for u or your vows
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Stay in your lane and don’t cause any harm to that woman’s family. It’s her place to confess her own harm if she chooses. How does he know that she hasn’t told her husband? If he wants you to believe that he made a mistake and is choosing to move forward in a better way, but he isn’t willing to grant her the same grace, I’d say be very wary of his motives here.
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To be honest, I would have been the one to tell the other husband! (I tend to be spiteful) I would want the other woman to hurt the way that your husband and she hurt you.
I am glad your husband and you are trying to work it out though. My husband physically cheated on me, and had a child with the woman. It took a lot to get the trust back between the 2 of us, but I’m glad we did. We have been together for 12 years now, almost 9 years married. Good luck.
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Focus on your marriage and leave theirs alone.
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If I was in this situation I would want to know, but I feel like it’s really weird that your husband is so bent outta shape worrying about the other husband finding out. Is he mad that he’s dealing with the aftermath of the affair coming out and she isn’t? Is he trying to reach out to make sure that it’s noted that HE’S the one that called it off to try and look better? In all honesty if you feel like he absolutely needs to know, I’d feel better doing it myself 
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I feel like he’s takin the right steps however, why is he so insistent on telling the other guy? Thats not his marriage or his problem he should have cut alllllllllll ties to the other women an he should be focusing on his own marriage an his own problems…not someone else’s…let them handle thr marriage as he should be handling your guys marriage…im not sold on “i would want to know if i was the other guy excuse”…i feel like thrs more thr thats not bein said…thr marriage is not his business… he should be focused on his(your) marriage and fixing whats broken inside the home verses tryna play coach with someone elses marriage…
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Please tell her husband… he has a right to know. You are doing the right thing. I’m sorry this has happened to you. But please. Let that man know. He deserves to know
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I say YOU tell the other husband. "Hey, I found out your wife and my husband were planning on leaving us and starting a new life together, just thought you should know. " Let him do with it what he will and leave it at that.
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I would of left your husband tbh 
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If it can be destroyed by the truth, it should be.
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What is his real motive for wanting to tell the husband? If it’s truly over between the 2 of them, it’s over! Does he want to tell him hoping they’ll split up? Leave them alone! You could cause more harm than good, unless that’s his motive. Their marriage is none of his business. It’s over now, remember?
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Would u wanted someone to tell u ? Thats your own answer … But i would want to know !
You should be the one to tell that husband and you should leave yours. Cheating is cheating nd most cheaters never change.
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Would u want someone to tell u if u didnt know ? There is ur answer !!!
I would want someone to tell me.
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Sure he wasnt being catfished? Never met her… Could been fake person. Happens all time. What does your husband care if her husband knew or knows. Its over. He needs to worry about his own mess
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Has he ever met up with her no , so how does he know that he’s not been catfished. This other person does need a little investigation 
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I think its odd he cares to tell her husband. To me id feel he wants to see if he leaves her bc he dont like knowing shes with her husband and not him. He wants to create a mess with thier lives bc a mess is in his life. Seem very immature.
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And how did you find out
Also i feel nothing will ever be the same with yous so why keep going
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He did not care about the other husband before, so why now? It sounds more like he does not feel he should be the only one with consequences, and thinks the other woman deserves the same.
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What would be the outcome if the shoe were on the other foot would he stay with you ? And are you truly trusting of him and his actions now after all of this
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I give you credit for trying to save what you have I don’t think I could ever not wonder what was happening that I didn’t know. I wish you the best. As far as telling I would let it go tell him he should have thought about the impact it would have on both families before it happened. And that will give him something to think about going forward. Beat wishes stay strong and don’t loose who you are.
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Someone told me this which made me think a lot … its starts in the heart before bed. The difference between a guy who only flirts through words and a guy who physically cheats is the right opportunity. Yes he may have only said words and never met in person but if given the right opportunity to he would have. Would you work through it to give him that opportunity later on with him knowing you’ll forgive him? You have to think about the principle about his actions. He had no respect for you, your relationship, and your family. It’s hard to do something wrong the first time but after that it becomes easy.
In telling the husband of the woman your husband was speaking with…I would. It’s hard especially when they have their own family but at the same time it will save him a heart break in the future and open his eyes on the type of wife he has and what she’s capable of doing.
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That man deserves to know just like you did
He needs to worry about fixing the problems he created for his own family and let the other woman figure it out , why’s he care about what she’s doing now since it’s “over” . Seems like he still cares some what if he is worried about the other guy not knowing . Obviously he didn’t care at the time when he was the one talking to the other lady. Right?. So why care about it now. For all he knows, she could be talking to a million other guys
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I believe your husband is trying to clear his own conscience. To somehow right his wrongs. In doing so, also punishing innocent people for HIS and HERS actions.
Perhaps him walking away from that “affair” is what may have ended up saving the other marriage. Perhaps your husband having “left” this woman showed her the light within her home, children and husband. OR- she’s just as awful and scheming as she was before and onto the next one. In either stance, your husband is not a factor anymore. And he should feel relieved to still be allowed back into his own role. I believe that your husband is not entirely disconnected from this woman. He’s harboring negative/ill feelings towards her. When in reality, he should be wanting to run away from that chapter in his life- as far and as fast as possible.
This is a red flag.
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I’ve been married 29 years. I would want to know. I’m glad you aren’t throwing away your marriage. Everything is disposable these days. Marriage is hard work, we change through the years, emotionally, physically, mentally and it’s hard to always be in love. Sometimes we don’t even like our partners but if it’s worth it to you go with your heart and work on things. Her husband deserves to know because she will probably do it again, she participates and should also have consequences. Not out of vengeance but respect for her spouse so he gets the opportunity to make his own decisions just like you are.
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Not your marriage not your problem. Imo.
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You be the one to tell her husband. 
and kick your husband in the dick cause he deserves it
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Follow your heart. You have to live yourself!
Seems weird he wants the other person to know. Unless maybe he wants him to know so they split up and then they can finally have a chance to be together. Be very careful.
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You cope with leaving him. Once a cheater always a cheater. When you love someone you don’t just say oh I’m sad, I’m going to go have sex with someone else. When you love someone you’re not thinking about other people.
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I feel like your husband was caught and he wants her to be also if he truely was happy he would drop it not worry about her and what she has and has not told her husband
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It seems to me like he’s almost bitter or jealous that he is facing consequences for the emotional relationship while the other participant is not.
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Your husband didn’t care about her husband before now he a born again man he all of a sudden cares nah makes no sense
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If he wants to work it out with you that other person shouldn’t even exist for him anymore. So whatever happens in her relationship or with her husband is none of your husband’s business. Is my opinion.
Unless he WANTS their relationship to fail and for what purpose??? … i mean “guilt” … men don’t know what that is.
I say he walks away forgets about her and anything having to do with her (including the husband) 100% or you forget about him.
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Regardless of his motives, how things end up between you, and while I think the husband deserves to know, in no scenario can I imagine that your husband should be the one to tell him. If there was ever a time when it would have been his place, it would have been at the very beginning, to both you and the husband. You and your husband focus on your marriage and your issues, get to the bottom of his motives, of both the affair and the need to tell the husband, and leave the other couple to do the same. And follow your gut, always.
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Don’t waste time concerning yourselves with what they are doing or what they know. Focus on yourselves and your relationship. Further communication of any kind will only cause you more issues.
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Tell the other person i wish someone would of for me
She may not be who she said she is and he maybe being catfished
Why is it so important for him to tell her husband? Shouldn’t he be concentrating on fixing it with you.?
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My husband did something like this once. I called him out in front of God and everyone. I also, found her address and sent her husband the copies of everything that was said. I agree with your husband, hers has the right to know.
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Allow her to inform her own husband. It’s not you or your husband’s place to do so. The focus right now should be on repairing your own marriage.
If you put yourself in their shoes, it gives you the answer really. Think how you’d feel and which outcome you’d personally want from it all. And go with that one.
Plus, of course you don’t want to hurt the poor children, however, they do still have the option of staying together and working as you guys are? Chances are, if she’s already being so heartless to her husband you can only expect that she won’t be being too pleasant to his face either. You might actually save the poor guy a lot of hurt and heartache.
I dont think it’s his place to say anything.
First find out what is wrong in your relationship to cause him to act this way .second I know I would want to know but why hurt someone over this .let it take care of it self and it will work on you two .I wish you luck in which ever way you choice
Your husband wants to break up her relationship to be with her. Leave him. He doesn’t want you. He wants her. Their relationship is theirs not yours to fix.
Your husband didnt feel bad or care about the other guy knowing while they were having an emotional affair…so why does he now? I have bad juju feelings about all of this.