Question: my daughter’s father has not seen or contacted her. Can I get child support. Advice? My daughter is 11 months, and her father has not contacted or tried seeing her not once. He is now having another child, and I wanted to know if I could get him for child support but without him getting visitation. I only want to look into the child support because if he can take care of one child, then he can take care of both, but I also don’t want to force my daughter on him if it requires him to have visitation
Child support and custody are two completely different things.
Yes you can do child support without visitation but there may be state laws involved. I did it in Pennsylvania and my son is now 12
File report with family maintenance they will do the rest
U file for support if he wants visitations it’s on him to file with the court for that
Depends on the state but normally they are considered two separate things. In missouri if you apply for medicaid or food stamps he would automatically be placed on child support
they are two different things but if you file for support he will most likely push to see her or try for 50 50 because people think they dont have to pay support that way
Child support and visitation are 2 separate things. If he wants visitation though he can file for it.
You can do child support without having a custody agreement. I have never went to court for custody of my 12 yr old daughter. But I did file for child support with civil courts. Her father never paid anything so he owes over 13,000. My son’s father pays 300 a month. He helped raise my daughter because we both knew her father would never try
Yes child support and custody are two different issues
You can petition for child support and custody. It would be up to him to petition for visitation.
If you do file he then more than likely will file for custody so he doesn’t have to pay as much so weigh your options & make sure you want that as well
Child support has nothing to do with visitation my daughters father pays child support and hasnt seen her since she was 2 she now about to be 16
In the state of Texas, and from personal experience, if you go for child support, you give the other parent 50/50 rights immediately. Even if they’ve never had anything to do with the child.
The child support office is in the courthouse in my town, I would start there
They are two different things but if you are willing to take his money you should be willing to allow visitation. I agree he.should provide for his kids. But he should also be allow to see his kid…
Contact a lawyer or child services in your area
Visitation and child support are 2 separate things. Find your nearest child support office and visit them. Its what I had to do and they had to “go though the back door” to get it going. If he wants visitation he can file fore it through the courts not the child support office.
File for it through the state. If he tries to bring you to court for visitation, go after him for child abandonment if he has not had contact with you or the child in over a year.
I totally feel you there. I have a 27 month old and ever since his father and I broke up when he was 9 months old his father barely ever comes to see him. His father had the audacity to knock up some 45 year old woman who is blind deaf and has up to 25 seizures a day. I’m getting all my paperwork ready and because I’ve been deemed as the primary caregiver I am going for full custody with removal of Rights and payment of Child Support. I wish you all the best of luck mama. Us moms shouldn’t have to deal with deadbeat fathers
Child support has nothing to do with visitation. However, if he applies for visitation, unless you have a really good reason for denying it, drug use, sex offender, etc…, he will likely get it. That doesn’t mean much though. My kid’s dad was awarded visitation and after a year he just stopped showing up except maybe twice a year. Then stopped completely. If he’s a good man and decides later to be part of her life allow it. If you don’t and he tries at some point she will later resent you for withholding him.
If you take his money, then you’d better be prepared for him to have 50% of rights and dealing with for the next 18+ years. His choosing to have another child has nothing to do with you or your kid, and it is none of your business. This could be a relationship, with a woman, that he WANTS to build a family with. He clearly did not want that with you.
They are completely separate, my children’s dad hasn’t seen my kids or tried too since he left us when my kids were 3, and a newborn. They are 9 and 6 years old now. He still lives in town within walking distance of us.
Child support has nothing on Vists and he can also be charged with abandonment of a child
He will most likely file for custody then and you cant want his money but not see his child. The judge most likely won’t go for it either.
Not usually. Typically support comes with visitation rights. Talk to your local office and see about state rules.
My state actually opened a child support case for me a few years ago, and I haven’t seen one red penny of it. Just because you file for it doesn’t mean you’ll get it, which sounds like that’ll be the case here. Also, as others said, if you file, you may also have to give him some kind of visitation or custody rights, which, also sounds like that may not be such a good idea. Protect that baby at all costs, first and foremost.
I don’t know how all that works but I’ve always been told that if the dad pays child support, he has rights to having time with his child (unless he’s proven unfit or custody has been told otherwise)
Child support and visitation are 2 separate issues. But opening one door usually leads to the other being opended as well. You don’t get to claim that he has parental obligation financially and then in the same breath say he doesn’t have parental rights to see his child.
The fact that him moving on with another woman and having another child is what started this whole thought process for you, is very indicative of your true motives.
As a child that grew up without her father because her mother withheld her, I can tell you that what you’re doing to that child is completely unfair. S(he) deserves to have both parents in all capacity. It’s not about you and your feelings.
Child support and custody are 2 completely separate things.
Child support and custody are 2 seperate things. You can go after child support but he does have a right to seek visitation/ custody if he chooses and you cannot withhold contact if he doesnt pay.
You sound like a bitter babymom
In some states you can still get child support when you have terminated parental rights.
Is he on the birth certificate?
This is crazy! I have been there done that. For you to say “get him for child support” and you don’t want him to see his child even if he wants to is crazy to me. Your child deserves both parents. While I understand that he has not been there, people change. I think you need to put your own feelings aside, move forward with support bc he does need to care for the baby financially, but maybe try to promote a relationship for the child and father! I grew up in a similar situation and the child is hurt in the end. My sons father is family if we are together or not. This guy may not know how to be a good dad… maybe he didn’t have one either… help break the cycle, not for him, for your child! Get the support! Children are expensive, but you also don’t want to pay $1000’s in doctor bills for therapy trying to repair your child from the childhood. And women don’t have to deal with deadbeat dads… you knew who he was sis before you had a baby with him!
2 separate things,but the fact you now want support because he has another child makes you sound very bitter. Go talk to your child support office for the best advice
If you don’t let him have visitation he can fight to have his parental rights terminated (since your not letting him be a parent) & fight to not pay child support.
I would never ask a man to pay child support if I didn’t allow him to see the child. (If he wants to)
He’ll file for visitation if you file. I’d leave it alone.
If he’s on the birth certificate than he has parental rights aswell. You can’t expect someone to pay child support and not him not have visitations.
On another note, he hasn’t paid child support for past 11 months and now he’s having another child, you want him to start paying? Sounds pretty bitter.
I get the whole scenario of him needing to take care of both kids, But why didn’t you file for child support from the beginning
The answer is yes and no if from what your saying is true then he probably won’t ask for visitation rights and even if given them he probably won’t use them but if you do file for child support do so knowing its opening up the door for him to claim his rights to the child if he so chooses to do so. Which honestly shouldn’t be a bad thing if he does your should want your daughter to her father in her life. But in the end its your decision and you need to decide if you wanna open that door or not.
I filed for child support for my son. The Father Never has seen him or made the effort to do so. But he pays every Month
Cut your losses…for the longest time my sons dad thought he could control me because he had visitation and was paying support and it was such a massive headache with all the constant head games and crap he would pull. I still get child support to this day, but he hasn’t seen my son in nearly 3.5 years. The mental abuse I went through for years with him was not worth the child support and many times I offered for him to just no longer pay and in turn terminate his rights since he wasn’t showing up half the time anyways and it was mentally hurting my son but he refused just to continue to have control over me and my life. The moment he stopped bothering and moved on with his new family, the better it was for everyone. My son is sooooo much better off and so much happier.
If he wants nothing to do with your daughter, as crappy as it is, she’s probably better off and doesn’t deserve that and the can of worms you may open isn’t worth the child support either.
So what if he is having another child…leave him alone. It’s not your problem anymore. If you want to go ahead with it, be prepared for him to have access to your child, which in all honesty he deserves to have a relationship with his daughter if he makes the effort and is proven to be a good parent regardless of how you feel or what you want. This isn’t about you.
Support and visitation are two separate court issues. If you pursue child support, be prepared to have him turn around and pursue parenting time
Sounds like you’re a bitter babymama.
Child support and visitation or two separate issues child support has nothing to do with visitation he would have to petition the court for visitation. Child support unless he says he’s the father will want you to do a DNA test and even after that he still has to petition the court he has no rights until he does.
Chasity Nichole Sheppard read these comments give u some info
Depending on what state you are in then after a certain amount of no contact then he abandoned his rights even if he pays child support. Where I’m from its a year
If he wants visitation he will get it. That’s not your choice to make.
Go file and find out if you need it that badly.
As some of the ladies have said … no , visitation is a separate issue. And yes , you can get support. BUT if you are doing it to be vengeful… leave it. You have to ask yourself the hard questions. It’s been 11 months… why now ? Just cause ? Cause of new baby ? New mama?
If you’re doing it just to " stick it to him " … that bitterness will eventually transfer to your child .
Do it now before the other baby is born and that mom gets child support. The first one that goes to court normally gets more child support. Sounds like he won’t even try for visitation but he could try for it now anyway without having child support set in place.
It honestly depends on where you are located. I would recommend calling an attorney. From personal experience in the state of michigan dad would have to take you to court to establish parenting time or visitation if parents were unmarried. If he is not on the birth certificate paternity would first need to be established. Also from personal experience my youngest child has not had a relationship at all with her bio father. He was not ready to be a dad at the time of pregnancy. She is now 6 and he’s now ready. I could’ve chose to hang on to my resentment and anger toward him for making me do it alone however I chose to give not just him the opportunity to be a dad but to also give my daughter the opportunity to have her bio father involved in her life. He has now been involved for a week and my daughter is head over heels excited about getting to know him! Sometimes we need to put aside our own thoughts and feelings for the best interest of our child! Good luck!
As much as we despise deadbeats, he does have rights to his child unless proven otherwise. If he doesn’t want to get involved but is willing to pay support then I guess that works for you but how will your child benefit in the long run? This isn’t about you, this is about your child. At least give him a chance to be involved and if he shady and makes excuses then you should ask him at some point if he wants his rights terminated. Also, check into parenting classes. I’m not sure how each state works but the state will make both parents participate. He would be in contempt if he doesn’t go. Just something to consider.
In Florida, child support and visitation are two separate issues.
You do not have to do visitation. He will have to fight you for any kind of visitation if he wants it.
Have him sign off rights and support your child.
Yes the father of my child had one before her that childs mom filed he pays but never sees the kid but sees mine all the time gives me money willingly and spends holidays with mine but not the other but the ex is bitter as he moved on
Why complicate yours & your child’s life? For monetary gain? For vengeance? For spite? Leave it alone, enjoy the peace of his absence & find your own peace.
They are different issues all together. Go for child support, also prepare for him to want visitation, which he is entitled to… just as you are entitled to child support
Filing for child support opens the door for him to file for visitation. But he could also file for visitation without you filing for support.
I might be one of the few but i think you should go for child support. He hasn’t visited or even tried to support his kid, but is having another…get him for all hes worth as far support goes. Ftp.
My bio dad never actually paid much child support and my mom didn’t want him to have visitation of us but the judge ordered it anyway for the weekends. He was a POS just using us to make him look good in front of his then girlfriend and family now that I look back on it.
9 out of 10 if he isn’t seeing the child a court order won’t make him. If he doesn’t want to he won’t. Where I live you cannot "bastard " a child so a parent can’t ask for a parents rights to be terminated no matter how long they’ve went without seeing them. The only way to do so is to have someone there when the rights are terminated to take over that parents rights.
Honestly, leave the money and him in the past, ask him to sign rights off and move forward… not worth it. I promise
Visitation and child support are separate cases. If you take for child support that doesn’t mean he gets visitation. He can request visitation or file for it if he wants it. If he pays support and wants to see her no you won’t be able to stop him.
Here in TN once you file for child support that opens the door for visitation. It sounds like he doesn’t want anything to do with his child, sadly, so you may not have to worry about it BUT it’s something to think about.
You might not have a choice, but you could try and get supervised visitations.
If your doing it just because hes having another child and your jealous then you are doing it for all the wrong reasons think about what is in your child’s best a relationship with her father or money , money isnt everything kids deserve to know the other parent dont just strip her away because your madd and don’t be spiteful.
My bf has another kid with someone else and once we found each other his ex decided she wanted to get child support even though he provided but once she found out I was pregnant she stopped letting him see his son so because she wants to be petty my daughter doesnt even know she has a brother so think about your decision and put the child first not anyone’s selfish ways…
I would only file if I actually needed the money. It’s been almost a year. He clearly doesn’t want anything to do with the baby. He should help support the child he helped make, but I think it would be better for your daughter if he isn’t involved in her life. If you put him on child support, he may decide that he wants to start getting visitation.
Child support and visitations are 2 separates issues in court
Get a lawyer, file for child support. Child support and visitation are different processes. And like other have said, it does open the doors for that. But you can get sole custody, since he doesn’t seem to want anything to do with the child. Then apply for child support.
You can file but doesn’t mean you will get it. My ex husband got another girl pregnant with twins. He buys everything for the twins but has only sent me a partial payment(about 100$) twice in almost 4 years. He’s about 40,000$ behind now. He has not seen the kids or bought them anything. He can request visitation but if doesn’t want anything to do with your kid now he probably won’t later either.
Yep the father of my oldest son left when he was 2 months old. Has no rights to him what so ever. The courts granted me with all rights. He also has to pay child support. He doesnt but hes suppose too!
If you want child support, you need to share parenting time. If youre not willing to let the child have a father why should he pay for a child he doesnt get to or doesnt want to see. Stop thinking about money and think about your kid
Child support and custody are 2 different things and would be 2 different hearings. You can file for child support and tell them he has never seen the child, they will make note of that when the hearing comes. They will ask for paternity testing. From there he can waive the test and say she’s his or say he wants the test to prolong the process. But they also usually give the option for you to ask for back support for the last 11 months.
You should also file for full custody -if you believe he would go that route- incase he trys to go that way to avoid child support since he hasn’t tried to see her. But wait till 12 months cause you can claim abandonment on the child and they might not give him visitation, or Atleast not unsupervised since the child doesn’t know/isn’t familiar with him.
My daughters father was taken for child support 3 years ago and still says he will take me for custody but I know he never will cause he doesn’t want that responsibility. He uses it as a threat. Of Atleast trys to. Doesn’t work to well. But it’s the Same with my son.
He helped you bring this child into this world he has to pay child support by law. Contact the courts
Well I divorce my husband when my son was like 1 year old somewhere like that he tried playing the part of being Daddy for a little while then he quit then he moved off every time they would get his check he would move to a different job well now I can say my son never had his daddy there for him at all and it took them all of this time my son is 32 years old now and his daddy just now finished paying off the 50 something thousand dollars he owed in child support and he never had had to try to see my son or nothing ever again now my daughter’s dad we were never married he denied her till 2 days before her first birthday a blood test proved he was the father they set up child support was only like $110 a month he came around saying her a little bit but then I found out that he wasn’t really seeing her he would pick her up take her to his girlfriend’s house leave her there and be gone the whole time she’s there most of the time so her stepmom was more like her daddy took better care of her too he never paid child support he quit his job when they got his check and he still owes in like 60 something thousand dollars in child support but a few years ago he was sentenced to life in prison so that case was dropped he still got a chance at parole but he didn’t want nothing to do with her when she was little and then when she got big he did because she was a girl he was just not riding the head like I seen somebody else said if you open up the door to child support they can open up the door to visitation unless they truly don’t want nothing to do with them
Filing for child support doesn’t give him visitation or any form of custody. (It doesn’t change the child’s name either. I’ve seen ppl believe this.) He will have to file for rights. However you will be making it easier & cheaper for him by establishing paternity. Generally if it’s ordered for mom to receive child support & the man she claims is the father is the state will pay for the test. If dad needs it for rights he has to pay it. (don’t tell at me. It’s what I’ve seen. I don’t make the rules.).
Most times its hand in hand. I passed on the CS and been just fine. His last visit was 4 years ago when my daughter was 3 months old. Sometimes you gotta swallow your pride and do whats best for the little one. Money won’t buy happiness in this case.
File for support and let him file for visitation
If you ask for support they usually need proof he the dad. Then if you get it yes most times said dad would have rights to see child. And even if he’s no ordered to it he can take ypu to court for visitation with said child. I’d let it be girl. Hey and you’ve no clue he will stick around for that kid either
Don’t worry if he’s not seeing his child now he won’t want to later. If anything he will be pissed off about the child support and really don’t want to see you or her. You should also be eligible for back pay but why wait till he had another baby your child has been the one missing out on extra financial help and is entitled to it.
U don’t need a lawyer. Ppl swear everyone can afford lawyers. And even the free ones aren’t available because of the pandemic. Go put in the paperwork for child support. And file for full custody until he files for joint if he decides to. Some states, you technically have sole until you file paperwork. You can get child support with or without him in her life. It honestly depends on the state and the judge. And make sure you get the back pay since he wants to be a bum baby daddy … good luck…
Child support is separate from visitation. Recieving child support doesn’t mean he has to see the child but it could help him in court if he wanted visitation. He sounds like a piece of work if he hasn’t seen your child and is getting another person pregnant. Hit that bitch with paperwork for a dna test if he isn’t on the birth certificate.
Soooo you want money from him but not for your daughter to have a relationship with her father…lady, your priorities are whack.
If you want money you have to file through the court. But he has a right to visitation if he wishes. Doesn’t sound like that’s what he will want though
depends on the state–need to contact an attorney. Be aware that many abusive men will want visitation even if they don’t give a shit about the child just to get revenge on the mom for making him pay (which he does owe whether or not he wants to be a father or not). You may want to have his father’s rights ended–he then does not have a right to see the child and you don’t get support, but that could be the safest option.
Sounds like jealousy and greed to me
You didn’t care about child support until you found out he’s going to have another kid
Also child support has nothing to do with visitation BUT chances are you will end up having to share your child because you want to be petty
If he has to pay child support theyll require visitation, also if he refuses to pay it there’s not much you can do. It can take years before they send a warrant for unpaid child support
Omg you sound so petty
I chose to skip the child support so that my daughter would never have to deal with her lowlife sperm donor.
If he has no interest in seeing her now, chances are he still I want to see her even after you file for support. You should hurry and file before the new baby is born.
Custody and child support are separate. My sons father lost physical and legal custody and only has visitation rights. He pays full child support.
You can file for child support and he would have to file for custody separately if he wants it…which he is entitled to do
You can get support w/o visitation. He will have to pay for a lawyer or petition the court if he wants it
Yes go after support but yes he can have visitation… it is his child too … just because you guys don’t see eye to eye don’t mean he shouldn’t be able to see and spend time with his child too if he wants
It’s not being petty, I completely understand because my sperm donor has 2 previous kids and they have a little sister my baby is 2 months old and he would rather do for the little girl that isn’t his and does NOTHING for my son. You can file for support and they ask what was the last thing he willingly bought, they do go by his income though. Visitation is separate but they had asked me if I wanted to go for custody since it was in the same building down the hall. Good luck mamas hopefully everything works in your favor.
Depends what state probably but when I went through child support they’re no longer with any type of custody/visitation. we made our own time sharing and it could stop if there was ever a reason for me to stop sending her. So pretty sure you can serve him with child support with no visitation
He would have to go to court for visitation rights. Just go to the child support office and file for child support.
If you have supported her for 11 months alone why even file for it now? It’s really just a waste of time, lots of drama and stress!
You can get support without visitation. He would have to file for visitation rights separately.