We have an 18-month-old little girl, and I am 7 months pregnant with our second girl. Recently my 18-month-old has started to scream when she wants attention, doesn’t get what she wants, or is upset. I know this because she can’t put into words what she wants or what is wrong, but the screaming is unbearable some days. I have gotten down on her level and told her that it hurts mommy’s ears to use indoor voice, not given her any attention, and trying to distract her with something else, but it’s really wearing on me. She was so bad today that I had to leave the room to take a deep breath so I wouldn’t lose my cool. Help, I need advice on what I can do when she does this!!!
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She is screaming out of frustration and to manipulate you to get a reaction. Instead of "it hurts mommy’s ears’ try "how can I help you?’ or ’ show me/tell me/use your words’. When she doesn’t get what she wants, tell her screaming is not acceptable and put her as far away from you as you can yet still in sight and tell her to stay put. The less you react, the less power she has and the sooner it will be under control. she screams because it works.
Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. How can I get my 18 month old to stop screaming?
Ignore it and move on unless it important…
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Whisper when she screams
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Ignore her eventually she will stop but it could take a while. Try to pay attention to her when she does good things
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Do not give in or if she’s just going to continue it it takes at least a week or longer to break her of it
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Whisper to her. She’ll have to stop to hear you.
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Following because my 20 month old does the same!
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Ooof i have the same problem lol
Attention is attention. Try not to react
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I’m sorry to be blunt but why are you having another one? Baby’s scream.
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I would suggest getting her hearing tested my son screamed a lot as a toddler we thought maybe for attention as well turns out he had hearing loss and the pressure behind his ear drums hurt him, once he got tubes placed in his ears he was a totally different child he’s had 4 sets of them and just turned 5 the screaming took a bit of time to go away at first as it was learned behavior but I found once he could actually hear himself, he stopped… definitely a suggestion worth checking out incase it’s something else
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Ignore bad behavior. Give attention to the good. Its hard but it works. I promise you. She is prob pr2tty used to getting attention the minute she squeaks. Allow her to figure out we dont reward bad behavior. Also working on signals for things she wants or needs . You’ll get through this I promise you.
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Disciplin, !!!¡!!!
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My almost 2 year old boy did this for a while as well. He still does it sometimes when he gets really upset or mad but he’s slowly getting out of it. He starting to talk a little bit more and I believe it’s just because they can’t communicate fully just yet. I know it’s unbearable and stressful to deal with but you kinda just have to deal with it until she starts learning or to express herself with words.
Yeah just gotta not react to her. Let her scream, walk away if you have to.
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May I suggest teaching her some basic baby signing? It will give her a way to communicate with you rather than screaming. It’s worked so well with my little nephew. Good luck!
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Listen im ruggit native mama… As soon as she opens mouth to scream poke her throat with your finger. She’ll gag and get mad. And she’ll do it. Keep doing it. She’ll learn. Thats how i did my son. He stopped real quick.
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My son did this and we tried everything! We just decided to completely ignore it me he stopped doing it after a few days x
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Put her in playpen or crib until she quits. No attention at all until she is silent.
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You may get her hearing tested. She may not realize shes screaming.
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My son would do this when he was very little. I also had my daughter very close to him. I had him tested and he ended up being on the spectrum. He has asperger’s syndrome. The school thought that meant he needed speech therapy. I fought for him to get one on one counciling through school 2x a week and extra one on one time with his studies. The school said they didn’t have to do that because he wasn’t autistic. They like to lump all special needs into one category. Well they did help him and every teacher and administrator knew my name when I walked in that building. This was 12 years ago.
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Spray her with a water bottle. Kidding…but it does work.
All jokes aside…how does she feel about the new baby coming? I have 4 kids all 2yrs apart so I am definitely familiar.
Have you asked why she is screaming?
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I just put my daughter in a different room, walk away and don’t let her come out until she is done.
Scream back, it’ll startle her, but I bet she quits before long, worked on mine!
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If you ignore the screaming she will stop. I know it’s hard, but that’s what you gotta do. When she screams, go into another room, and ignore it. Eventually she will stop screaming
I have 3 children and some parents are afraid to raise their voices to a toddler but if it were my own child, I would tell her to stop it in a voice of authority until she does. Children are really bad at listening. We need to teach them the tools to listen to us. So no more ‘you hurting mommy’s ears’ 
you go down to her height and say ‘stop it, right now.’ Parenting skills always change once you have more than one. Good luck 
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Take her to her pediatrician and get her ears checked. She can also learn simple sign language words like more, drink, eat, poop, etc. to help facilitate communication. Also, as you go through your day, narrate everything you do. Keep up a constant stream of words. Read to her. Blow bubbles with her to help develop muscles in the mouth.
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put her in her room and tell her she can come out when she stops screaming. then you walk away and shut the door
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Baby signing time on you tube
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If it’s an attention thing, don’t give her what she wants. That’s how we stopped the tantrum phase in our home. They did it for a reaction and when they didn’t get the attention they wanted from it, it stopped. I feel you, though. I have a special needs son and the screaming is unbearable sometimes.
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Mine started screaming when her father started giving her less than usual attention and stopped immediately when he started giving her proper attention again
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Get a spray bottle with water. Give her a quick small spray, like a cat. They instantly, stop what they are doing and look at you. Then address the problem. I broke my grandkids from jumping on the couch, messing with stuff they aren’t supposed to. I also use it if they are physical with one another. It gets their attention fast, and it gives you an opportunity to correct the problem immediately.
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Let her scream it out. I know it’s hard. When she finds out there is no reward she will stop.
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Have you gotten her evaluated with a pediatric specialist as well as had her ears checked by an audiologist? I’m a mom of a little one who had to do intensive speech therapy that’s why I ask. Definitely get her evaluated.
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Put her in a room _ shut the door… When she stops open the door & ask her if she’s done. The Doctor recommend it for one of my grandchildren & it really works.
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My daughter was like this, because she was behind in speech and couldn’t communicate properly. We consistently told her “use your words” and it worked like a charm. Eventually she caught on and started using her words. Now we have no issues 
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You actually did the right thing. When she screams, leave the room.
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I like the spray, was thinking that my self .
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Spray her. Put her in a room till she’s done
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Put a sticker on the wall nothing fancy just something and tell her nose on the wall arms to your side. Stand till she’s done. Or amount of time that’s her age two mins. With my boy I make him do that or we have a timeout bench. I make him sit on the bench face the wall and he has to keep his hands on the wall for four mins.
~ his age~ he seems to really hate it!!
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Teach her sign language
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We used sign language with my children, started using is shortly after birth. My oldest has CP so it took him longer to sign but my youngest was signing milk for bottle at 3 1/2 months. It so nice knowing what he wanted when communication was still developing.
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If you know there’s nothing wrong with her let her scream and leave the room. Once she realizes she isn’t going to get the attention she is looking for she will become bored of it
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My grandmother would sing over my tantrums
Start screaming back but LOUDER. She will get the point very quickly.
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Try the my turn trick 
she screams u tell her its your turn and u scream I mean I do believe screaming is threaputic
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I’d take her to the doctor before asking folks on a social media site.
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Throw a slice of cheese at her lol
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Ignore her… Like when they fall look at you first before too see how you reacted. Don’t give her an reaction but don’t reward the bad behavior either. With the new baby comin she with test you alot. They are smart they know when things are about to change.
Ear plugs on Amazon!
Yeah. Ignoring her might work, but what is it teaching her? My step kids were trained with this attitude. Omg, they’re a mess.
Always address baby’s emotions directly. She’s a tiny human, with emotions and needs. She can’t handle them on her own. She’s allowed to feel. Don’t shut her down. But do try to teach her what to say and do when she feels this way. Start with sign language. My son connected with Daniel tiger, deep breath. Count to 4.
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Big Little Feelings
Check it out. It helps.
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Big Little Feelings on Instagram has awesome tips and reminders with what to do in these circumstances.
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Wait…are people really suggesting to “spray” her like some do to a cat? Well, I wouldn’t even do that to my cats, but I know people who do…
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That’s how some 18 month old communicates. They are trying to express themselves but can’t communicate. Just don’t give in to what she wants no matter how much it drives you crazy. Or she will know I can just cry and get my way. Stay firm, say no, walk away when needed. When my 18 month old starts throwing a fit I lay her down on the bed with her blanket, cup/paci and let her calm herself while I’m in another room.
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I also taught my son sign language. Sometimes he still screams though lol sometimes you gotta just walk away momma that was a healthy thing to do instead of losing it. The screaming back at them louder just terrifies them I don’t think you should try that route. Not that I’m judging. To each their own. I sometimes sing to my son over his or I’ll talk to him in a really calm voice and he has to stop screaming in order to hear what I’m saying. Sometimes though you just gotta let them scream it out.
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Mine does this. She’s 17 months old and I gave birth to her sister in June. It’s a little harder to get her to stop because her dad gives into her because he can’t stand it when she screams. He has super sensitive hearing. I used to get frustrated and yell for her to stop which just made it worse and made me feel guilty. Here recently though when she does it, I tell her to come here, get on the floor and give her a hug asking what she wants.
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Sheena-Marie Pope omgggg
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Something might be wrong
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My 4 year old started this and I hug her and tickle her until she’s able to stop then I ask her to play with me took me about 25 min today to get her to play a board game with me but it worked and we had a better time then went right to bed.
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My 16 month old does it too… Usually cause she’s excited lol.
Teaching her baby sign language may be a big help. Children get frustrated when they want to communicate but can’t.
Secondly, try anticipating her needs and initiating interaction more. That can help little ones feel grounded and connected when they’re experiencing anxiety and other big emotions that are hard for them to cope with.
Lastly, when it does happen, try to respond cheerfully and turn the following interaction into something light and fun. Overcome the feeling of being upset. I know it can be overwhelming when you already have so much going on, but it’s even more so for your little one. Turning a stressful moment into a silly moment will help you both feel better and calmer.
Good luck, mama.
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When my granddaughter cries I start singing the alphabet! She stops and listens but I ha e to keep repeating it over and over! But I find singing helps!!!
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You have to give her zero attention when she does it and stay consistent act like you do not hear a scream. Maybes ear plugs while she’s doing it will be easier to tolerate it. But don’t give in and positive reinforcement for the times she’s not screaming and doing good!
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My niece screamed because she was hard of hearing and could only hear herself when she screamed. By 4 her hearing was tested and found she needed hearing aids.
Give no attention when she does that and ignore her, otherwise she will keep doing it because tots that age will test your behavior and play on what you react to. Then when they calm down give them attention
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My son did that growing up and he is autistic. That was just how he communicated at that age.
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Don’t engage. When she calms down ask her to use her words. This will take time and patience but it does work.
Scream back. Maybe she doesn’t understand what your going thru.
I did it and she stopped frozen, looked at me and laughed. Now she
Hardly ever does it… 
Make a appointment to see a doctor
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Maybe try screaming back? When she starts screaming,scream at the top of ur lungs,then ask her to use her words,do u want a drink & show her a drink,do u want a snack & show her a snack,…tell her screaming is for outside. Maybe take her outside when she screams to show her 
Also maybe when she stops screaming give her a big hug & tell her thank you 4 stopping hurting mommies ears good luck!
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Teach simple sign language! I found baby ones on YouTube! It’s so frustrating for all to not be able to communicate! The signs don’t have to be perfect, you can make them your own even. It’s not an overnight fix but it will be worth it in the end!
Don’t go into another room for starters. You’re giving up space that you own and a child is going to see that as a win. Instead, put her in another room, time out, early bed times, taking away games/toys, some kind of consequence that makes it clear that what she’s doing will not be tolerated…
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You probably should have thought the whole ‘having another child’ thing through. If you can’t handle one screaming what are you going to do when one is screaming and one is crying. Walk into a different room away from them? 
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Try baby sign language so she can tell you what she wants without getting to the point of this frustration because she has no other way of telling you what she wants. Or go around and point to things that may address her needs. Thirsty? Hungry? Food? Milk? You don’t have to react in a way that will enforce the behavior, responding calmly may ease her stress though and show her she can sign or show you, what she needs. Good lord some of this advice being given is borderline neglectful to an already stressed child and potentially harmful, imo.
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When my toddler behaves like this I sit on the floor near him, I let him have a melt down, and keep asking if he wants a hug and tell him mummy’s here when he’s ready. It’s ok for children to express emotions through screams if they can’t communicate it any other way. Yes its stressful, yes it’s tiring, yes it’s hard, but they are little humans. It’s ok for them to have moments of being overwhelmed and not know how to cope.
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time to find some hobbies for the little one ^____^
Don’t just assume that your child is misbehaving, as other posters have said it could easily be an underlying health issue. A gp appointment is a good place to start and don’t take no for an answer. You know your child maybe it is something and nothing but it could also be something more important like autism or deafness maybe even just a simple ear infection but worth looking into. Good luck with this and your new baby
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I screamed back took one look at me as if I was crazy stopped screaming from then on but it could be a medical reason just check it out with your doctor good luck
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It’s pretty normal for that age and the more you draw attention to it, the more she’ll continue to do it. Just try to redirect her attention. If it’s a communication issue, teach her baby sign language or a simple cvc picture cards/board to help her express her needs.
Pretty Normal… they do OUT grow it! Trust me they do… My 3rd Baby just turned one and he kept screaming alot Before he was one! he seems to have out grown it now Thankfully! I feel for you… Xx
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I have 5 and 2 of them did this. For one, I ignored him completely or put him in his room to scream. When he saw it didnt get attention, eventually he stopped. With the other I got back in his face and screamed back.eventually he stopped. Every child is different. What works is different.
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I’d just scream back
Every time she screams bring her outside show her outside is for LOUD voices inside is for quiet voices. One or 2 roars might settle her abit my son did it for awhile he never spoke a word till he was 3 and couldn’t tell us what he wanted . When he started screaming I’d take him outside and show him big voices belong outside. And I scared him once with a scream inside I just said what really loud and he didn’t like it 
stopped though. Even with no communication I still managed to toilet train him x
Spanking…only thing that ever works. New Era parents want to set them in time out lol and all the new children are terrors.
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Half if these replies are honestly horrible. 18 month olds, even if they know right from wrong, they dont know how to handle their emotions properly, or how to calm down. It will pass with age & as she matures. She’s a year & a half, in no way should you be throwing water on her when she cries, or slapping her across the face or at all for that matter. These people are sadly uneducated. You should be attending to her needs, because at this age crying is her only way to communicate them. If you cant handle it, step out & collect yourself. She isnt misbehaving by wanting attention, thats normal. She shouldnt be behaving any other way at her age. Hang in there & if you cant, let someone watch her & take breaks so you dont take it out on her.
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Have her show you what it is she wants. It does work! And works for both of you!
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18 months is a baby and they don’t understand. Screaming is the only way she is able to communicate. Walking away is a perfect thing to do so you don’t lose your cool. At this point, all you can do is be supportive of her big feelings and realize she can’t communicate with you like an adult. Walk away when you need to, and be understanding and loving towards her. That’s what baby’s need. And if she wants to be hugged/cuddled, do that too
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I’ve always asked my daughter “do you want to be left alone for a few minutes” or “do you need a hug” she 95% chooses the hug. If she continued to scream I would walk away from her for a minute and then come back to her to explain why we don’t need to scream to get what we want after giving her a hug.
Now at 3 years old she tells me when she’s mad, sad or happy.
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I don’t hit my kids (1&2 yo boys) but I am QUICK to pluck them. Mouth. Ears. Shoulder. They know to sign and all that but when they get that temper tantrum…they get a quick Pluck Pluck!! And a “Mama said, No thank you, I don’t like that!” And it’s done. Don’t read too much into it but do NOT just let it pass. Good luck and God bless. Safe delivery!!
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It’s a phase because they don’t have the words to express themselves so they become frustrated. You can try and use guiding questions to help. I’d avoid some of the advice that is rather down right child abuse.
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Lmao idk if this works but I got 5 kids and the youngest is 14 months he was screaming to get attention one day I lost it lol I just screamed ahhhhh right back at him he was so shocked he stopped instantly I felt instantly less stressed he thought it was funny and forgot to continue screaming mommy’s mental break worked
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Teach her sign language. And show her a little extra random positive attention. You’d be surprised how much of a difference that makes.
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I have a 3 year old boy with autism and he screams a lot because sometimes he wants something and doesnt know how to tell me. I also have a 9 month old baby boy and he got used to his brother screaming after a while. It doesn’t bother him anymore. But what has worked for me and my oldest is trying to figure out what he wants. And stay as calm as you can. Maybe shes thirsty or hungry or just wants some cuddles. Its hard to tell sometimes but once you figure out a way of communicating with her it’ll get easier. I never hit my son or punish him for yelling because he cant help it and doesnt understand inside/outside voices.
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The ones actually commenting to squirt cold water in their face is disgusting!! This baby is not a damn cat, she is a human being and mind you, this type of behavior sticks. I was in foster care for a reason!! My mother did some screwed up stuff! Walking away and taking a breath is one thing, we all deserve our sanity! Time outs can be effective if done right and consistently but to squirt them in the face or like someone said throw them in the shower 
you’d be surprised how early trauma can start and these kids will soon start to resent you whether you feel they won’t, this will instill fear in them and be afraid of you. You should be ashamed of yourself for taking that approach!! Not okay 
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I have an 18 month old that’s doing the same thing. Normally some snuggles and mommy/daughter time fix her right up. Ignoring her makes it worse and it goes to a whole new level with mine. Like throwing herself down and kicking. Then I have to hold her to prevent her from actually hurting herself. So, I just pick her up now and ask her to point to something she wants if she wants it, and I show her cup, snacks, toys etc until I figure out exactly what she was trying to tell me she wanted.
Try BabySign!!! Babies can understand cause and effect of actions. They can make movement much easier than vocal sounds. Look up some videos on youtube.
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Loose your cool a good but busting won’t hurt I raised it never hurt them maybe ther pride a little
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