How can I get my husband to help me?

Uhh your only 5 weeks in to this…men dont have a motherly instinct… Hence the motherly part of that …give him time to become a dad…ffs he’s working so there’s something he’s contributing with right…you dont need to stress about finding childcare or anything

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Most men need specific things to be in charge of. If you just keep saying “I need help around here” they have no clue what you mean. If you say can you help with vacuuming, or unloading the dishwasher etc, they are more than willing to help. Just be clear what you want help with

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Honestly I don’t think your overreacting at all. My husband and I have a 19 month old son and we help take care of my sister’s 2 kids who are 2 and 3. My sister passed away a year and a half ago. My husband works a physically demanding job, outside on his feet all day long, rain or shine. Plus lately he has been working a lot of overtime but from the moment he gets home, he helps me with the kids. He might not help with the household chores but I have absolutely no problem with that. I can cook, clean and do the Laundry but the fact that most weeks he works 6 days a week but yet on his days off I’m the one who gets to sleep in, while he gets up and plays with/takes care of our kids, that is a real partnership and in my opinion that’s the way is should always be.

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My husband has always helped out…a little bit. But when I need a lil extra help I say “can you do me a favor?? Can you change her diaper…” I would say this while I’m getting dinner ready for her dinner…I’m busy…he’s watching tv, basically when I’m busy and he’s not and something little has to be done. Now he automatically does this every night while I’m getting her dinner ready…yes it took more than a couple of times to get him “trained” but it saves me 5-10 minutes. I suggest starting with something small (while you are busy so he can’t say “why can’t you? You’re not busy”) and repeat it daily/every other day and the he might just do it so he doesn’t have to hear you ask him all the time. I know it sounds childish but it worked for me. Good luck Mama

Can I be honest with you?

I have been there… It sucks and it’s rough, but it’ll get easier as she gets older. Baby will be less demanding as she grows up.

Get up and leave for a day. He’ll appreciate when you’re there to help.

Let’s put it this way-if you were working and the baby was in daycare you would be expected to do it all anyways so he should be pitching in even though he goes to work everyday. Maybe not getting up in the middle of the night but definitely evening until bedtime duties while you rest up and reset.

He can help during the
weak

One of the most common problems when you have a new baby! I wouldn’t ask him to help with the household chores if your a stay at home mom. My husband works I take care of the house/ yard but when hes home we both take care of the kids.i found if you ask men dont really know what you want from them so just simply hand him the baby. Then tell him what the baby needs ( burped, feed, changed) keep in mind that hes new at this too and it may take some time.

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Mine never helped me with anything and we ended up splitting up and then I never got any child support or anything. So at least he works and helps you.

I have a 3 month old son
My boyfriend didn’t help me either in the beginning but now he does bathing, burping, playing, exercises and even feeds.
Some men are very scared when the baby is still small.
Give him time. He will come around and help you when your little one is a little bit bigger

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well you will get even less if you leave youll do it all have no income and no one to nag

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Should if thought about this before having baby with boyfriend. Welcome to the real world

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Equal work to make the baby = Equal responsibility for the baby.

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I always did, never thought anything of it really. Went back to work when he was 3 months and still did everything…Maybe if you put your daughter in his arms to feed her? Guys aren’t very good at knowing what to do.

Sweetheart you are living life. When you chose to have a baby you just did not realize how life works.
Keep loving the baby and just do the household chores that gives that baby a clean and happy home.
Women have done all this by themselves since the beginning of time.
He will not change so you must do what needs to be done.
Take care of your home and your baby!
Find a pair of “big girl” panties and carry on.

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than speak up. ask him for help during the time he’s not working. she’s his kid too.

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I totally disagree, it is teamwork, not asking to do housework etc but some kind of help, I have a husband that assisted with night feeds, dishes etc hence the reason we are still together today. If you are prepared up with it then that’s up to u but raising a baby without help is tough.

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I know that feeling, that was me all my life 39 years of married life, children are reared and gone, but I still have do all them household. chores. I worked full time for 10 years, then did caring of the elderly partime, then cared for my elderly Mother until she died 2 years and 4 months ago. Some men think that because they out working all day their day ends at 5 or 6pm. Also their Mothers spoilt them, doing everything for their sons. Never taught them how to do any household chores. 2 the mothers that did well done.

You might need to show him!!!

Highly unlikely he will change, just like most other men.

I had that with all of mine. It’s a man’s world :confused: At least he goes to work.

I don’t know. Mine didn’t help either and we didn’t last