How can I help ease her mind?

My step daughter who is 17 just told us she is pregnant. Her father has sole custody and she doesn’t see her mom much. She asked to see her mom to show her the ultra sound and we said yes. When she came back she was in tears. Her mom told her that teen moms aren’t meant to have kids and that she will probly need a c-section. Now she is scared and worried if she will have complications or lose the baby because of some of the things her mom said. Any advice I can give her to help ease her mind?

I had my daughter when I was 18. Yeah a csection was needed but other than
that, ZERO complications. My next child was a vaginal delivery! Tell her no need to be worried. She’ll be a great mom and she has you guys for support. Good luck!

Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. How can I help ease her mind?

Do your best to explain to her and teach her about the birthing process and how to prepare her body and herself. The more educated she is, the less fear she will have.


Tell her everything is gonna be ok and she will be a great mom.

I will never understand why tf a mom would say this. Next drs appointment get her to talk to the dr about her fears. My daughter was 17 when she had her first and didn’t need a c section and everything was ok. Please just reassure her and tell her that you two will talk to the dr together to put her mind at ease.


My daughter was a teen mom and everything came out great


Wow, that’s unacceptable. I was a teen mom. Very scared, upset, excited but disappointed in myself. The last thing she needs is anyone else doubting her. Be there to listen, help, go shopping, get her prepared & excited. Oh, by the way-my son is now 17 himself and has always been the biggest blessing in my life :heart:


My mom had me at 18 and was 100lb I was born vaginally.


Also birthing classes may help!

So many Girls her age or 2 years younger have had kids and dont have c section so start there and ofc educate her on giving birth and the changes her body will go through she will be fine shes not the first or the last teen mom

I think it’s wonderful you & dad are supportive of her pregnancy despite the circumstances. Of course, it isn’t ideal. But having you two is everything she needs. Just felt like you should know that! :sparkles:


She’s going to be fine. Her mom is a moron for saying messed up stuff. I had two c sections and both my kids are completely healthy smart mouthed little turds. Try and make her smile and my step daughter had her baby at 17 and that baby girl is happy healthy and omg shes gorgeous.

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My sister was 14. It sounds gross but the nurse she had was a family friend. She massaged her vagina opening to help with it not tearing so much. I was cut by one very impatient doctor at 19. Her body will do just fine. 17 use to be the age most women were on their second or third kid. You can definitely see why bio mom doesn’t have full custody…

Tel her that her mom doesn’t know what she is talking about and that each pregnancy is different. I had my oldest when I was 17, she is now 17. I didn’t need a c-section. Yes I struggled financially and it was hard but I wouldn’t have been able to do it without the love and support of my family

Pass her along this info from me if you like, I fell pregnant at 17, had baby 2 weeks after I turned 18. I had the easiest pregnancy and delivery (natural) I could have ever wanted. All pregnancy’s and babies will be different but that will have nothing to do with her age. And it sounds like from yourself and her dad she has a good support network, that’s all she needs :heart: all the best to her.

So many teen moms out there. And they had them natural. It’s not uncommon at all. My girl was 14!!.. ya it was hard. Although we had a good goggle as she was told she was so polite… lol . But she was most definitely still a child… she is 17 now doin good. Her dad and I never left her side to this day,we were actually in the room with here to see our grandbaby born… amazing. Just do ur best as the 1 comment said to explain… the body knows what to do… I was shocked myself at how well her body took it. She bounced back no problems at all.

Going to the right doctors and taking the right precautions can minimize the risks of teen pregnancy. Yes, it’s tougher on a girl’s body if she’s not done developing yet, but medical care and education can help ease her mind. Bio mom was just being reactive and petty :woman_shrugging:

Check out the group birth tube on Facebook there’s lots of videos of successful birth maybe she will feel more comfortable after watching other successful births.

God is in charge! Everything will go how ever he has it t planned for her and baby! I. Don’t know who she is but she will be a great mom and it sounds like she has a pretty good support system! You are doing what is right by being positive and making sure she is safe and not stressed ! Keep her happy and safe and the rest will work itself out!

A doula would be amazing if financially viable for you.

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I was a teen mom pregnant at 15 I was scared but happy…just reassure her things will be ok. I did just fine no C-section my daughter is now 16 and I wouldn’t change a thing

One of my cousins got pregnant at like 15-16. She delivered naturally with no complications. Tell your step daughter everything will be okay and just address any concerns to her doctor.

Im a teen mom and honestly my teen birth was the easiest! The other two I had when I was older was harder on myself and my body.

Hire her a doula!!!

Reassure her that the woman’s body is divine, it is built of wisdom strength and power. I’d talk with her about setting boundaries with her mom and protecting her own peace of mind for herself and baby. A lot of women are giving birth at home with doulas and midwives these days. C sections can often be imposed on women who choose to blindly follow their doctors. Regardless of how baby is born the most important is that they’re healthy. Maybe find some supportive pregnancy resources to ease her mind. Her body and her voice matters regardless of how old she is and that needs to be acknowledged so she doesn’t go through this process scared and doubting herself.

I had my first at 17. Able to have a vaginal birth.
Birthing classes helped a lot! My baby is 12 now and we are best friends!

Is the father of the baby in the picture? If he is, help them look for good antenatal classes or if he’s not and she’s comfortable, go with her. I love that you care so much and want to support her. That’s the biggest thing she needs right now.

I read what to expect when you’re expecting when I was pregnant the first time and I think it helped me a lot.

I had my first when I was her age. Everything went just fine.

I was 14 when I got pregnant with my first! No complications. Really easy pregnancy and natural birth ! Healthy as could be.

I seriously love how supportive these comments are!!

I 100% agree to them all just keep reminding her everything will be alright!
I had the same fear and talking to my ob doctors or family doctor help me ease my mind off it!:heart: wish her the best of luck and for a healthy baby and family.

Think back to the old days!! There were teen mom’s for centuries. Now a days it’s not ideal because there are some much to experience. However, it has been done can be done and will experience so much more in a different way that will make you appreciate it even more!!!

Let her speak to a gyno. No teen believes their parents if they think their parents are trying to appease them. She believes bio mom because she’s emotional. And she might not even believe her. She might just be horribly disappointed that her bio mom was negative. Get her to a doctor and encourage her to ask alllll the questions she can possibly think to ask.

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I had my oldest at 16 and he saved me from a life of regret and bad choices as I was heading down the wrong path! Age doesn’t matter it’s how much love you have to give to your child. She won’t understand until it’s time and once that baby is out and she looks into it’s eyes, it’s a unconditional love she will feel that no one but a mother can understand :heart: today is actually my oldest son birthday he is 12

I was 17 and pregnant I did have a c section and he was very healthy :heart: still going strong 6 years later

I got pregnant at 17 years old with my oldest son. I didn’t have to have a C-section. But I was scared going into labor and delivery. But everything turned out fine! I delivered my baby vaginally and him and me both was healthy as could be! It’s scary. Especially for a teen mom. Just encourage her. Let her know that she will get through it. Etc.

I had my first when I was teen !! Honestly it was the easiest pregnancy & birth out of all mine. Reminder her body is young & there are tons of smart doctors & nurses that will help her in anyway possible!


I was a teen mom: pregnant at 15; birth at 16. He’s 36 now. I became a doula to educate teen moms. Please get a doula for her. And keep on giving her positive support!


I was 18 only 95lbs I had no complications an delivered naturally. Now I have four total an I’m 30yo an 95lbs lol my mom was the same way with the negativity, my aunt took me in actually thank God :pray:

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I had a child at age 17 all natural with no complications and that was 25 years ago Everything went very well. Everyone is different and that is terrible that her own momma scared her like that. Moms are supposed to be the comforting, supportive ones. Tell her she will be okay and assure her that you and her father are there for her no matter what.

My cousin had first baby at 15 and it was vaginally both were healthy :heart:

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I was 17 with my first. No complications and quick delivery.


Reassure her that her body was made for this. Reach out in the community to see if there any young moms groups. Younglives is great and all over the US typically. Also facebook groups for young moms. Let her know you and her dad are here for her and the baby as well.

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Just remind her that everything will be ok and she is going to be a great mom. I had my son when I was 17- turning 18 and with him I had preeclampsia so I needed a c section but we were both ok, He is 13 now. Her mom obviously wanted to scare her, which isn’t what she needed, she needs the support you and your husband is providing her. Everything will be ok. :heart:

I too was pregnant at 17 with my first. It was an easy pregnancy and an easy delivery. Tell her it doesn’t matter how old you are, just that you take care of yourself.

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I had my first baby at 16. I made it. I went to school, college, and raised my little girl

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Tell her that her mother has fed her a bunch of bs lies. Not to sound angry myself but I’m triggered a little by this because I delivered my baby when I was 15. I dealt with bs with my mother as well. Telling me I needed to get an abortion etc etc… I delivered vaginally my healthy baby boy he’s 7 now.

I had my son at 17 with no meds all natural. It is possible. Have her go see a foul, midwife or Dr for medical advice. Also a community for mom would be helpful.


I was 17 (27 now) when I had my baby via c-section and both my pregnancy and delivery were completely fine, no complications at all. my daughter is 9 now and happy and healthy. she will be just fine :heart:

Her to write down all her questions for when she sees the doctor.
Her mother just be a real piece of work for this to he her reaction when her daughter needs her help. She’s lucky to have her father and stepmothers support and love


I got pregnant with my oldest at 18 and had her at 19. Didn’t need a c-section with her. I suggest looking into a dr or midwife(I loved my midwife, they are very kind gentle soles and were not as scarey as a dr at that age). And having them talk with her about everything. Maybe get her a pregnancy book so she can read up on it. All you can do right now is reensure her shell be ok and be supportive

OMG! Sounds like she needs to stay away from the mom completely! Tell her she will be fine! I was 17 when I found out I was pregnant and aside from pre term labor and being on bedrest I delivered a perfectly healthy baby girl who is now 17!! Just give her all the love and support you possibly can!

I was a teen Mommy and didn’t have any problems. Her age isn’t going to affect/bother anything.

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I became a mom at 15. She’s got this yes I had to have a c section but that 7.14 ounce baby is now 11 years old a straight a student qnd the kindest person I’ve ever met!! C section is a scary word but I worked in a hospital with a lot of teen moms would come in more often than not they would deliver their babies and just go home we never really had a situation where it ended badly. Just have her breath and tell her not to listen it’s not facts.

How would you feel if your teen daughter came to you excited because she is pregnant? Most parents hope the best for their children and know becoming a parent as a teen will take their “own life” away from them till their child is well and truly grown. Anyway, I wouldn’t concentrate on their relationship or what goes on because it’s up to the 17yr old to learn and understand who her mother is, so if you want to comfort her accept (which you did) when she wants to reach out and let her and her mother work each other out unless your SD is in danger or something. Plenty of time and situations coming up where you can support her on her journey to and through motherhood. I’d probably want all the help I could get LOL.

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I had a baby almost 24 years ago 2 weeks after I turned 16. You gotta reassure her. Talk to the doctor with her. This I think will be more helpful if it was you and her and doc. Things I front of dad gets embarrassing. Good luke she will do great and the more positive support the better.

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There are millions of teen mothers that had no issues with child birth the best solution is make an ob/gyn appointment and go with her tax the doctor about what her bio mom told her. Offer to be there for her as much as she is comfortable with.

Just be very supportive of her. Teen moms succeed every single day. This would light a fire under me just to prove my biological mother wrong!

when she goes in for her next OB appointment, mention this to her OB so her OB can assuage her fears if you and her father cannot convince her. Sometimes hearing it from a professional can make more of an impact than from other sources including parents.


I had a baby three weeks after I had just turn 15. Vaginal delivery no problems just comfort as much as you can. Tell her it will hurt like hell but her body will help her naturally and c section are for if and when there is a danger to the mother and child. Support her as much as you can.

I was pregnant at 17 and delivered a 10 lb baby vaginally, a month after my 18th birthday. He’s 25 and has 4 younger siblings all delivered the same way. She’s got this :heart:

Had my daughter just weeks after my 15th birthday. Started high school with a child. Zero education on what was going to take place in the delivery room therefore, I wasn’t prepared at all. It all came to me naturally. Today my daughter is 19 turning 20 in March. She’s in college on a full scholarship and rocking this life stuff. Having her is what made my life purely amazing. Many blessings to your family.


I had mine at 19 and did just fine! Also have had 3 c-sections and yes there is pain and healing but you service tell her she is strong and regardless of any complications she needs to remember that God doesn’t give us anything we can’t handle and remind her of the support she does have! Tell her good luck and she’s got this!!

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Tell her that stress like this will cause deformities and the baby could come out being like her mother. :face_with_monocle::rofl::rofl::rofl:
But seriously… you need to tell her that her mother is wrong, and she shouldn’t have put such fears or thoughts into her head. Yes, having a whole human grow inside of us until it’s time to bring it into this world can definitely be stressful… but she is young, probably very healthy, and she has her dad and step mother as her support system… which is major. Any concerns she may have can always be brought up to the obstetrician during visits. Potential complications are checked through blood work throughout pregnancy. Plus, these days there’s SO many cool things that help make delivery so much easier and can really be a great experience. She’s going to be fine. :blush::hugs:

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I had my first at 15 and had her naturally. Everything was fine.

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Littlerly all moms used to be teen moms. Her body can do it

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I was 17 155 pounds pre pregnancy and delivered an almost 11 pound baby vaginally. She can do this!

I was 17 when I got pregnant with my oldest and I had her at 18 and did not have a c section. She can always talk to her doctor about her concerns with what her mom has said to her. If she is not going to be supportive then she needs to cut her out either most of the way or all the way. She doesn’t need unneeded stress for her or the baby.

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Had my son at 16. Completely natural and had a healthy 7 lb baby.

I had a baby at 15, 16 and 19 :joy: she ain’t the first teen mom or the last. Tell her she’ll be fine.

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Hi! Teen mom here! I had HG but I’ve had that will all 4 of my kiddos. I did not need a c section and I breastfed successfully! I’m married. We live a good life. I just graduated college with 2 bachelor degrees. I’d be happy to be on your support team! Feel free to send me a PM:)


Her dad needs to talk to her and not let her mother scare her

I was a teen Mom, had my daughter at 17. Everything will be fine. Keep up with the doctor appointments, a listen to the doctor. I did not need a c section, I had my daughter natural and no drugs. God bless her♥️

I had my first child at 17 shes now 21 and she was born healthy and natural. Her mom needs to shut her mouth and be more supportive. Being a new mom isnt easy and being a teen mom makes it harder. But as long as she stays healthy and does what her doctor says she will be fine. Its scary but it sounds like u and her dad are being very supportive dont stop she will need you

I had 2 kids before 19 both all natural. Tell her she will be absolutely fine as long as Drs agree. As for her mom, tell her to shove her opinion :slightly_smiling_face:

Mom’s an idiot. My mom had us at 15,16,18,20, and 34. All natural and was a fantastic mom. Still is and she’s 73 now

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I had my son at 16 and all natural 8 5oz no complications

17 year Olds have had kids for centuries before csections were even a thing.

I feel my pregnancy at 17 went a lot smoother than my pregnancy at age 25! When I was 17 I went into labor naturally and had a smooth sailing delivery… I think it’s bc my body was so young and new :sweat_smile: now as I get older everything hurts. So many people told me when I was 17 I’d fail and how hard it would be… I still remember all the bad things people said and I used that as my motivation to become all I am today. Becoming a mom that young isn’t easy but I wouldn’t change it for the world. She’s going to always reflect back on this time in her life and the negative things her mom said. The best thing you can do is be supportive (which it seems like you are):two_hearts:… she will remember that 20 years from now.

Make her a dr apt asap so she can hear it from a professional

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Tell her that the only one she needs to listen to is her OB. Maybe also pick up a copy of “What To Expect When You’re Expecting”.

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Well her mom isn’t helping the situation by stressing her out…. Just because she is a pregnant teen does not mean she will have a C-section…. Her mom needs to be a little more supportive. Maybe there’s a reason she doesn’t see her much.

I was 16 when I had mine. Healthy baby boy had him naturally he’s now 18

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I had mine at 18 I’m 24 now but it wasn’t bad and I didn’t have any complications with my first :heart: tell her she is okay and she’s safe and that She can do some research on child development and it’ll help ease her mind a lot :heart:

Had my oldest at 15. Natural I might add. Just be there for her. Don’t do everything for her but guide her. Her mom wasn’t very kind at all.

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That’s no true , my daughter was 16 went she had her first baby and everything was fine, any body could have c - sections at any age,I have one for my four baby at the age of 32 , it wasn’t bad

I was 18 when I had my daughter I didn’t have to have a c section my daughter was healthy the only thing that was wrong was she was sunny side up and she ripped me open

She’s probably scared enough and her bio mom just made things worse. That is so sad.
I was 16 when I got pregnant with my oldest son and weighed barely 100lbs. I was 17 when I delivered him (5 days before my due date) and didn’t need a c-section. 18mo later I got pregnant with twins (planned pregnancy) and weighed 92lbs. I didn’t need a c-section with my twins either. I had a really awesome OB with my twins and he was very up front about complications I would probably have because I was so small. I went into early labor at 26wks, but my OB was able to stop it plus took all the necessary precautions to allow me to carry for 10 additional weeks. A good doctor will calm you and take your worries away. My oldest is now 26 and my twins are now 23.

That’s ridiculous. Biologically speaking, late teens is an ideal time for a first baby. She will probably have a much easier time physically. Her struggles will be societal and personal. That’s where you come in. Maybe don’t involve bio mom so much.


Teen mom here :raising_hand_woman: I am 31 years old now. I had just turned 17 when I gave birth to my son. All natural, no complications… 7lb 11oz :heartpulse: she can do it! Sounds like she has great support from you and your husband at least.

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My mom was 15 when she had me went into labour at 740 I was born at 745 vaginal

I was 14 when I had my baby. I did not have to have a c-section. Sure, it’s not ideal to be a teen mom, but it also isn’t the end of the world. I, not only graduated high school with a 4.0 GPA, I did the same with college. I married her dad, we have a big, happy family, and our baby(now 17), graduated high school early with a 4.0 GPA, has never been in any trouble, has worked a full time job for nearly a year, and will be starting college soon. Obviously, my story isn’t typical and it wasn’t easy, but it was and is worth it! My best advice is be supportive. Let her talk through and make decisions without feeling pressured to choose what someone else is telling her to. Don’t listen to stereotypes. Love her! That’s the best thing you can do.


I had my first baby at 15 and had no complications and a natural birth. Women were having kids at 12 and 13 back in the day. I’m not saying that this is right, I’m just saying that everything is going to be okay. Women are made for babies💗

I was 17 when I had my daughter no problems at all.

Least likely to have c section.

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I was a teen mom and I had a healthy vaginal birth. What’s done is done. I highly suggest supporting her. Talk about options- abortion, adoption or keeping the baby. Talk pros and cons of each, but support HER decision. Be there for her!


That’s so cruel of the Mom. I’d say to get her some pregnancy books to help prepare her. Maybe find a documentary or watch Teen Moms together. Lots of reassurance, and baby shopping is always fun to do together. There are many successful teen parents, with your and your husbands love and support she’s going to be okay.

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Go you momma for being the positive support she needs right now. :heart:


My daughter had her first child two days before turning sixteen and she had her natural with no complications.