How can I protect my brothers baby?

I do NOT get along with my sister in law…at alll…i just do not think she is a good person and feel my brother can do way better…anyways…he ended up gettin this girl pregnant and she is now 5 months pregnant and she already has all these rules about us seeing HER child…and when/what we can/cant do with HER child…like my brother doesnt even have sa say in what happens…she wen tout and got a tattoo WHILE pregnant and thinks its okay…well this tattoo and got infected and she ended up in the hospital and i feel like this is just the start of all the tings she will do wrong to this baby…what can i do? how can i protect my brother and this un born child?

362 Likes

Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. How can I protect my brothers baby?

It’s out of your hands girl. Trust that your brother will do what he needs to do when the baby arrives.

7 Likes

You can mind your very likely biased business until she does something to actually endanger her child that you can prove. (I don’t agree with the tattoo but also not likely to help any argument for the child’s safety when said child isn’t here.)

12 Likes

As good as your intentions may be, that’s your brothers job , unless it becomes a case of abuse where you can report it to the officials and take your niece or nephew in if it ever came to that point

5 Likes

Sadly, you can’t. Your brother is going to have to make his own decisions and you have to just be there and support him.

3 Likes

Nothing, it’s not illegal to get a tattoo when your pregnant it’s just not recommended if your brother is concerned for HIS child then he will take care of it.

5 Likes

She’s the mother🤔 sorry but put yourself in her shoes and think how well you’d take having an in law but in to you and your babies business.

2 Likes

Unfortunately, there’s nothing you can do unless she is neglecting the baby once it gets here.

1 Like

The tattoo thing is wild… but as a mother … her baby her rules… I have rules too…and I dont care who you are to my baby( outside of baby dad) … I am mother and you will follow all my rules… dont like it … dont see my child!!!

9 Likes

As a sister in law mind your damn business :joy:🤦

Stay in your lane. If your brother is with her and loves her and Is having a baby….it’s not your place or business to get involved or voice your personal feeling about thier relationship….how you treat his family is a reflection of how you feel and respect your brother. Tread lightly. Be a good human and sister.

16 Likes

unfortunately we can’t control other people however you can file a report to the state about the welfare of the child if you have a legit concern for the babies health or safety and they can investigate

Mind yo own business

Stay in yo own lane

4 Likes

Start looking into lawyers (with your brother), document EVERYTHING!

8 Likes

You mind your business, that’s how.

9 Likes

Wow :roll_eyes: it’s not your child. Stay out of it. You sound like the meddling in law that no one likes. :woman_shrugging:t2:

22 Likes

Even respect them and their wishes and be a part of that child’s life

Not your monkey. Not your circus.

You can’t. She’s allowed to make rules with her child because it’s HER CHILD!

11 Likes

You could try maybe minding your own business since it’s not your baby? :thinking:

15 Likes

it is HER child … it’s hard but true

2 Likes

Mind Your Business and let your Brother deal with it not your problem…

3 Likes

Mind your own business. If you want to be a part of the babies life you need to abide by the mothers rules

5 Likes

By minding your business! Lol

2 Likes

Not your job at this point

You can’t and til this baby is born and your brother takes her to court depending on what state y’all are in the mother has full custody if they aren’t married so technically she can make any and all decisions and rules about the baby as she pleases and y’all gonna just have to suck it up . I don’t agree with the tat while pregnant but unless she were to cause harm to this baby then you can’t do squat lol

Your entitlement is scary

18 Likes

That’s is HER child :joy: you don’t like her, that’s your own problem. Quit stressing out your niece or nephew! What kind of auntie are you. I don’t blame the momma for allowing you minimal time. You wouldn’t get sh** nothing no visitation nada.wed throw hands

13 Likes

I mean, short of calling the authorities. Nothing unfortunately. Document but keep your distance.

Key word- HER child. She is allowed to make rules regarding HER child. If you don’t like it, then you don’t need to see the her or baby at all.

6 Likes

Stay out of it not your business id cut you off

2 Likes

Tbh it’s her child and your brothers. Can’t really say or do anything

1 Like

You’re the worst ugh I feel bad for her that you’re in her life :joy:

9 Likes

CPS ONLY cuz of the tattoo. Love tattoos love babies. Knowing your pregnant that’s not okay at all.

5 Likes

Just be there for your brother if you happen to see any kind of neglect or abuse have a journal of dates and times. Call authorities if something happens. You can’t really do anything…

Maybe this is why lol. It’s her kid and you already wanna take it and ‘PrOtEcT iT fRoM hIs/HeR mOm’… ok Karen

14 Likes

What age is your brother, 10?.. for god sake, mind your own business

9 Likes

This is your brothers job to handle not you. Aunts have no right unless a parent is deemed unfit from drugs etc.

3 Likes

Mind your own business. Her child her rules.

3 Likes

That is HER baby! You have NO say so in anything. If he really feels like she’s an issue then he can take the proper steps but you have no cents in that quarter. Stay out of it and stop trying to already think of ways to separate a child from her mom!

15 Likes

Nothing you can do so let it be. Maybe mind your own business and grow up.

Nothing u can do maybe talk to your bro tells him to get his crystal balls outta her purse but no joke don’t open that can unless u ready to lose your bro cuz he will choose his last and baby if he is a good man best wishes

She’s setting boundaries stay in your own lane and mind your business you let that child choose you guys when they’re older

5 Likes

“she has all these rules already about us seeing HER child” bc it’s HER child you highlight it like the baby isn’t hers and she has no right to say that… kinda like you lmao :rofl: I get the vibe maybe she’s using the child as a weapon and that’s the stand point you have but this is not the way to go about it. She can decide whatever she wants for her child

3 Likes

Smile to her face and deal with her for the sake of that baby?

3 Likes

If your state has a responsible father registry, he should put himself on it now. He also should file for paternity and 50/50 shared parenting as soon as the baby is born. Then, it’s up to the two of them to decide how to parent and move forward. He needs to protect his rights from day one though.

1 Like

Yikes…I would not want you around my child, either…

14 Likes

I think the tattoo was a dumb idea, but you’ll never have control over what she does- she’s the Mother. So don’t even try.

6 Likes

It is “HER” baby. Have your fucking own and leave her alone. I bet your insufferable. Leave that new momma alone, your brother probably ain’t shit. Lol

I’d talk with your brother and express your concerns. He does have a say in the matter, might just has to wait til their child is born.

Keep notes of everything (every detail!) and take pictures for physical evidence (if you can!)

Continue to support your brother but understand, always complaining or bringing up the subject may put a wedge between you guys so maybe try “watching from the shadows” while being supportive.

Not saying be fake, just talking from experience.

Praying for all involved in the situation & hope things get better! :heartpulse:

I totally get your concern. Because the child will also be your niece/nephew, but unfortunately other than being there for your brother, that’s about all you can do. And it sounds like if you push any harder, you might ending up putting your brother in a position to choose her or you. I’d suggest trying to get over how you feel about her, and try to be the bigger person so you can keep them in your life.

You can’t do anything because it isn’t your child and you have no say. Like it or not, the only ones that have a say are the parents. With that said, your brother had enough balls to get her pregnant, he needs to have enough balls to speak up about THEIR child.

Once the child is here, if she is harmful or neglectful, you can file a report with CPS, but her not liking you, isn’t a reason. If that baby is fed, clothed and taken care of, there isn’t anything you can do to force her to let you or your family see the child.

There is nothing that you can do. It is HER child not yours to protect. There is nothing wrong with getting a tattoo while pregnant. Tattoos get infected even when you are not pregnant. You should back off and let your brother and his baby mamma handle decisions with their child.

1 Like

Your brother does deserve a say however you do not. Mind your own uterus.

14 Likes

If I were you I would not interfere. You are a spectator in her life with her child.

3 Likes

That IS her child. She is setting up boundaries because she can see you clearly don’t know how to respect her. Get over it.

20 Likes

Pray a lot and try to be her friend

i smoked some weed during my pregnancy to help with sickness. not saying it’s ok, but it in no way determines how i raise my son or weather i’m a good parent or not.

yes she got a tattoo and no it’s not recommended. but that does not mean she will not love and care for her child. it doesn’t mean she will be a bad parent.

4 Likes

I would help my brother get a lawyer if he is not with her and file for his rights as a father, then she can’t control when and where his sees his child. A child is 50/50 not 100% what the moms says

You can’t do anything.
It is •her• child.
She can do what she wants.

2 Likes

Also I wanna add another comment. They baby is not even born and you’re already coming up with reasons why this woman is a shitty parent and doesn’t deserve her child before she’s even a parent you sound like you have some issues going on internally too

Sorry are you the mother? Are you carrying this baby? Did you help create it? If the answer to all 3 questions is no then off you pop sweetheart. Her Child her rules respect them or loose everything

You can’t do anything. Stay quiet and pretend your ass off. If you alienate her you’re out

Lord…you act like this baby is yours. The best thing you can do for you and the baby is, be nice. Learn her rules for her baby, and abide by them. Sure the tattoo was stupid, but we all aren’t Einstein all the time.

4 Likes

Talk to your brother otherwise leave it alone

:joy: you do as she says as regards her child… the end!!

3 Likes

If you want ANYTHING to do with that baby, I suggest you become friends with her. I promise she can and will make sure you have nothing to do with it.
As a Mom, I’d do the same if my sister in-law felt the need to tell me how to live my life.

6 Likes

YOU can’t do shit because it’s not YOUR baby.
“He ended up getting this girl pregnant”….
Your sister in law….meaning HIS WIFE.
None of your business. Stay in your lane.

That’s child endangerment while she’s pregnant, this can be reported and she may have to he watched for the remainder of her pregnancy and then they will give the baby to who’s most responsible

1 Like

Nothing! Mind your own business! Her baby her rules.

1 Like

Stay in your lane and respect her boundaries — she doesn’t like you either obviously.

4 Likes

Yeah I’m not one of these stay in your lane type people. I am however a put up or shut up type person. If this was me, I’d stay involved. Yep in agreement that the tattoo might not have been a great idea, but it’s not like she downed a bottle of Jack’s. Maybe be available for help if asked or needed, be supportive of her. You want to have a positive connection if you want to stay in that baby’s life. You never know, you may find you have something in common? Try not to judge, this is a new world to her.

You can stay in your lane

5 Likes

I get your concerns BUT it’s not really anything to do with you unfortunately. It’s between her and your brother

This is obviously a joke post. If it’s by some chance not, leave them all the fuck alone its not any of your business

I think u need to grow up and mind your business tbh it’s not your baby it’s your brothers and if u sont like the rules that’s too bad . Seems like u resent her based on stupidity ( except the tattoo ) she may have wanted the tattoo but it’s the tattoos place job to ask these questions and tats can get infected preg or not !
If I was her I’d hide the baby from u
You sound nuts

5 Likes

Find something better to do with your time. It’s not your child.

6 Likes

It’s not your place at this point. If…IF at anytime the child is in danger of any kind from the mother, THEN you step in. As for “rules” or what not, if your brother doesn’t agree with the rules he needs to grow a pair and speak up. This is his child as well and they should be on the same page.

16 Likes

You realize your place and find something else to focus on.

6 Likes

You can rat her out to her Obgyn.

2 Likes

Sorry to say, it’s got nothing to do with you, and you harassing her and trying to take some control is way out of line, you don’t have to like her, she doesn’t have to like you. Your brother is an adult, back off, you are going to cause a whole lot of drama at a time when your brother deserves your support

6 Likes

You mind your business. That’s exactly what you do. Her child and her body. You do not tell people how to raise their kids. If your brother sees good in her then let them be.

1 Like

You need to mind your own business and stay out of your brothers relationship
She can have whatever rules she wants it is her baby ! You feel alittle to entitled

5 Likes

Tell your brother to record everything and he will need proof of unsafe conditions or her being a poor Mother. Such as drug abuse or alcoholic behavior. Get a lawyer for him as well. Do it now before she gets the upper hand. God bless.

1 Like

I don’t think any of this involves you. The more you get into her business, the more she’s going to shut you out.

3 Likes

It is HER child. You sure as he’ll have no rights to it. I highly suggest make nice with her or you won’t be seeing HER child at all

5 Likes

Why do you think you can lay claim to a child that isn’t yours? Her baby her rules. It’s best to try and be nice and make an effort with her because she will be the one dictating what kind of if any relationship you have with that child. Your title doesn’t mean your entitled.

9 Likes

They have every right to dictate rules for their child

2 Likes

You sound controlling

1 Like

Well it is HER BABY WITH HIM NOT YOURS.

4 Likes

Women like you ARE A NIGHTMARE of judgements and snobbery. Blah

19 Likes

That is HER child. You have absolutely 0 say. She has clearly established boundaries and you do need to respect them. As far as the tattoo while pregnant goes, while it isn’t totally recommended - there are women that get tattoos while pregnant. Her getting an infection because of the tattoo it could’ve happened because her hormones from the pregnancy can reject the ink.

Honestly you just need to stay in your place and respect the boundaries established whether you agree or not. Your “title” to this baby does not entitle you to the baby.

26 Likes

Not ur baby not ur issue…

You can’t. They got to make their own mistakes. Let your brother be a man.

2 Likes

Pick your battles. If your brother isn’t going to fight then unfortunately you need to stay civil. There’s plenty of time still.

1 Like

No one is claiming this child she is just trying to stop more harm from
Coming to this child y’all are unreal

3 Likes

You seek legal advise as the father has rights. You also document everything. If they are separated tell your brother to do a parenting course this will more than likely be a requirement if he wants sheared care.

I love how this post is not going the way she was expecting . I’ll admit the tattoo sounds dumb . But she sounds young and dumb. Probably her first child . Be her friend . Guide her , help her there are so many things you can do to be there for her . Shes allowed to make rules an expectations for people around her child .

24 Likes

The only thing you should so is report the tattoo shop that tattooed a pregnant lady… That’s the entire thing that is definitely wrong for someone to tattoo someone pregnant

4 Likes