She is too young to understand yet she will learn in her own time but at her age she needs touch x
You should of never had kids than 🤷. It’s part of life and part of being a mother you can’t sit there and wanna be done. Get over it and play with your daughter. She is still young and still very playful. In a few years your gonna be wishing you had that again
I don’t know what is up with these other parents but kids won’t learn boundaries unless you teach them learning about personal space is a taught behavior I’m teaching my 5 yr old that not everyone likes to play the way u like to play I always talk to her and explain to her that momma loves you and loves to play but sometimes momma don’t want to play she needs a lil space and she gets it
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Look up space invader character great way to help a child learn and understand this. My daughter has sensory processing disorder and adhd this was her and this helped her
It takes a while but my oldest eventually learned that all that crazy shit wasn’t for me and she would even say sometimes when someone would tell her to do something to me like "not my mom, I could my dad but my mom would kill me"
We do still play, just not all the wrestling and rough housing and tbh, that’s never, ever been my thing:woman_shrugging: I went through a lot and it’s just not fun to me and someone always ends up getting hurt and if it’s me, I’m gonna get mad af cause I have a short fuse and a bad temper so in our house, that’s just how it is. Now my 4yo… we’re definitely not all the way there yet but she seems to be learning some more and more. Just talk to her, explain what you expect, it’s definitely gonna take a bunch of reminding her in the moment and maybe even a few times of getting upset but consistency always works:100: F all the judgy shit also:roll_eyes: Ppl seem to forget that just because they had it good that we all got so, lucky and either forget or just dgaf that some ppl have issues regardless of where they come from.
Chilldren touch you it’s life get over it They are only little so long.DONT WORRY when shes a teenager she won’t want anything to do with you.and good grief just tell her no to climbing on you.But for you not wanting her to touch you at all you need some counseling and don’t have Any more kids.you have some serious issues that need addressed by a Dr
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Honey, once you have kids there is no personal time , private time , or personal space! My 15 year old is asleep in my bed right now. No Honey! When you become a mother you lose privacy and the right to your body. She’s 4 ! She wants love and attention and it is your job as her mother to provide it! My God woman what did you think would happen after having your child ? Yes we all want a break. Hire a sitter and go on a date night, take a bubble bath or go to a movie with a friend but if you push that child away she will recent you and as she gets older you will have problems. Now suck it up buttercup and go make your kid a snack and play with her. Damn!!!
U going to miss this inna few years from now please learn to appreciate it while it lasts …
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So, I think there is a good lesson to teach your daughter here. Her body is her’s and your body is yours. I suggest teaching her to ask permission. I also suggest sometimes allowing her to do it. I completely understand that icky feeling of needing space and not being able to get it, but it’s really important that you dont make her feel like you are pulling away from her.
Just tell her to stop climbing, swinging and hanging from you. Touch is very important for tou and her, trust me you will miss this period when she is a teenager and Wont even look in your direction.
Ok. First of all there’s NOTHING wrong with wanting your own space. I have a 7, 6, and 4 year old. 2 of them boys. Seems like I am constantly touched in some way by them. And it gets overwhelming. Then my clingy bf (lbvs) gets sad when I don’t want him touching me after I’ve been a jungle gym to them. What us moms have to do is just give them activities to do that doesn’t include such contact. Color, puzzles, games, play outside. She may just be bored and needing things to do.
First of all you need to get the fuck over it!!..
The end
Fuck sakes
Just simply explain that you don’t like her climbing all over you. Tell her you’re not a jungle gym. Tell her she can sit next to you, but she can’t climb on you
I tell my son I need a minute. He usually just sits next to me (not touching but still fairly close)
I tell my kids no. Stop. When I need a break. Sounds like you need a break. Idk. 4 years old and already don’t want them to touch you 
I can understand if she was 12+ years. But she needs your touch right now. She is still very small and young
I agree with the person (maybe few people) that mentioned anxiety. I have the same issue and I feel terrible, but the extra touching just gets to me. For me, it’s very much anxiety related. I haven’t figured out how to be okay with it more frequently. Repetition and reminders for her is all you can really do. As long as you show her love and remind her how much you love her she’ll be okay. Especially if she gets her rough housing time in still
It is annoying from time to time ,its not horrible of u to feel that u just want space. However being a mom to 5 ,in only a couple of.years u will basically be begging her to hug and cuddle. U will wonder what happened and where the time went. U will want her to lay down and rest her.head on u while u watch a movie,hug u like no tomorrow but she will most likely grow out of being as affectionate on her own. Breathe, tell her.to give u a minute,and enjoy it. I miss it ,I really do. If I could go back.id proba ly have them hanging on me more than they did. 
my oldest is graduating next year. Time will fly. Dont let your precious memories fade away,u will only get them this once 
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It is completely normal 2 want ur own personal space
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Just tell her no and to go play… my daughter was clingy af when she was 1 to 2 now after a few months of gentle reinforcement she’s nearly 3 she’s out doing her own thing playing with her toys occasionally wants a snuggle when we lay down n watch movies other times she tells me to move over and not to touch her
I love how some of you are pretty much saying that because she’s a mother she doesn’t deserve personal space. No. Everyone deserves personal space. I don’t like my kids (3 and 4) constantly climbing all over me or anything either. Does that mean I “should’ve used birth control”,or I should just “get used to it”? No. I feel the same way with my fiance some days. Sometimes I just don’t want to be touched,end of story. Just tell her mommy has had enough for a bit,and that you will play with them a little later. It seems to work with mine.
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I am a touchy-feely person but I totally get not wanting to have your kid permanently attached or attacking you.
Set times for non-touching playtime: catch, Barbies, puzzles, games, race cars on the floor—not on Mom, walks holding hands only. Set times for no touching if you need space where you set a timer for up to an hour when she needs to play by herself but can see how much time is left.
Let her know you are more fragile and you will hurt and break things if she isn’t gentle with you. We told my kids they couldn’t barrel into my elderly parents because “Grandma and Grandpa have fragile bones and they will break.”
Be sure she has an opportunity to get lots of physical activity like running outside, playground time, trampoline to jump on outside or mini tramp to run on indoors.
Once we can get out of quarantine look for indoor pools, climbing walls, soft play spaces and/or McDonald’s Playplaces for rainy day energy expenditure & hiking tr,ails, canoeing/kayaking opportunities for outdoors. Put on music & dance together but separately. If you can afford it, get her into sports, dance, swim, karate, gymnastics, skating or other movement classes. Tell her to mime her requests after watching videos of Marcel Marceau or other pros.
Spend down time cuddling next to each other while reading, watching TV, talking. Find ways to touch each other that are not painful for you. Nap on the floor with the tops of your heads touching, touch feet or ankles as long as there’s not lots of squirming or pushing. Let her lie down with her head in your lap while you stroke her hair, elbows, knees & feet out of striking distance. Give each other hand and foot massages, rub or scratch each other’s backs or heads. Give her an egg to take care of for a day or more & tell her that’s how she should be with you.
Good luck! When she’s a teenager she may not even want to look at you! Totally normal.
Lol. Welcome to motherhood
some of these comments. Teach her personal space and explain to her, but dont expect that her playinf with your bf means she doesn’t need the same from you. Your her mom she’s gonna want to do the same with you touch is important kids. Your her world.
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Enjoy it. Because when shes older, shes gonna want her space from you
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Search how to stop a dog from jumping on people and use the same technique
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My son is almost 4 and he is exactly the same also not a person that likes it but they only this young for such a short time. When they teenagers she will ignore you and have her own life and tor going to be sorry that your child wanting your every thing even a jungle gym is fine. A good mother puts her kids first always not themselves you gave that up when you had her. So enjoy before they she learns to hate you then you will be one hell of a sorry parent when it’s all too late
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I feel you I’m going through same with my 5 years old but life changes they grow old and then it’ll be them trying to get rid of us.
So you don’t know how to tell your child no and create boundaries?
Enjoy this time while you can remember these are “The Good Old Days”
In a couple years she won’t want anything to do with you cherish this moment unbelievable
We teach our children ( 5 & 3) from day one to respect someone else’s body. My children want to be all over me too. Sometimes I’m okay with it and it’s welcome, other times I’m “touched out” and need space. In those moments I tell them how I’m feeling. I tell them I don’t want them climbing on me/ touching me etc. it’s called respect, and if you don’t show them how to respect your body, how will they show someone else to respect theirs? It’s okay to want to be touched- by your partner/ kids/ friends/ whomever. It’s your body and your rules, period.
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Next time use borth control…
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Hey! I’ve been through this =) my daughter had the same issue at 4 and she was doing it to others aswell. She had a delay meeting impulse control milestones. We had some help from a lovely psychologist … the main thing I remember was getting her in a habit of asking first. And for this to work you have to say yes occasionally. It teaches consent and respect. PM me if you want to xx
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Yea my son is 7 and still doesn’t get personal space … so I taught him about the arm length rule and he gets it for the most part. Some kids are just like that … it’s not anything to get worked up over
I just told my son that I was touched out and mommy and couldn’t handle being touched or played on for a little bit. That I needed a little but of me space too. He understood at this age and I just reminded him when I needed my space. I started at about 3 1/2 yrs when nursing stopped. Due to me nursing that ling I just couldn’t stand to be touch 24/7 anyone. Which is 100% ok. We could read a book,play color etx without him having hands keep legs etc on me 24/7.
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hopefully that goes for ur boyfriend too and not just ur daughter
I remember when I was 4-5 years old wanting to climb over my mom and sit on her lap and her gently telling me " No" " you are getting too big" I have a 3 year old nephew who likes to hang on me, he’s being taught not to do that by his parents. My own son isn’t a year old yet, but I’ll try the same thing as my mom did with me to teach him. Just because your child is getting too big to let them crawl all over you (they are getting heavier, and its straining) does not mean that you can’t give your child needed attention still. Hugging, cuddling. These other mothers saying too bad, deal with it you had a child, suck it up. They just need to shut up. They are the reason spoiling their kids and letting them have their ways instead of teaching them properly. So those kids end up being spoiled brats and poor members of society. I was taught that children are supposed to respect their parents. I was taught as a child to respect my parents and other adults and also boundaries.
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The only problem I see is that with him it’s fine but not you. No needs to be no to everyone not just you. When she comes towards you put your flat side out towards her and very sharp and firmly say NO. She will get the message but it will take time.
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I to get what your feeling and I have 4 grown kids and a 7 and 5 year old, I miss the big ones higs and kisses but they all have to learn tour not a climbing frame! Explain when she does it that you need 5 mins and thell her your not for climbing on and she is a big girl now.
Use birth control from now o
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Wow. Just, wow. I have no words. Your poor, poor daughter.
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That being said kids do this and it takes time. I have a 12 year old that doesn’t get it still sometimes.
I started teaching my kids when they started walking when it was time to play on me and when it was time to leave me alone (we will still play but not on top of me). Some mom’s just need their personal space. She is 4, she will understand that when you say no you mean no. Dont listen to people saying “shame of you that’s your daughter”. So what? Kids need to learn what personal space is. Now when my kids were sick I let them be up my ass of course but other than that when I said no they knew I meant it.
You guys are assholes. Stop judging her. You seriously like your kids using you a fucking climbing frame? 
I wish my daughter would be in my face like that, shes autistic an wants her own space. Enjoy what others strive for.
Everyone here being very judgmental! People have boundaries. Children need to learn them . There is playtime then there is " Get off me " time . Cuddle time and not cuddle time . Teach her ! Make her stop when you say stop !
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As a more introverted person I really value my personal space. So for everyone that is going to make you out to be a bad mom please don’t feel bad. It’s okay to not be touchy feely. Obviously when they’re infants/toddlers that’s different but when they’re older it’s okay to have personal boundaries. My daughter is a lot like me and isn’t a touchy feely kid so we haven’t had the issue but it’s okay to tell her every once in a while “okay, mom needs her space for a little bit now”
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I totally understand the feeling of being “touched out”
My 5 year old know we can cuddle & hug all he wants,
But i am not a jungle gym.
You have to maintain consistency and establish the new boundaries of what you find are acceptable form of contact.
In all honesty it’s not bad to establish personal space at that age due to she will get going to school in the next year or so.
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Sorry but what did I just read?! She will only be this young for a short time, in the blink of an eye it will be you wanting her affection and her love but she will be too busy with friends or too distant from you because you didn’t want her affection.
Yeah people will say I’m judgemental blah blah but I couldn’t imagine being that way with my son. Of course mothering is hard, take a few days out if you’re feeling overwhelmed but don’t take it out on her xx
Sounds more like anxiety symptoms
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One day you will miss that so very very very much.
You will wonder why you ever felt this way.
She will grow out of it sooner than you think.
Kids need learning to be interactive. I did the “elbow room” with my preschoolers. So I’d touch my shoulders, and flap my elbows like the chicken dance. I’d say elbow room, and get them all giggling and doing it too. They would use that technique with one another too.
It isn’t jungle gym time, it is elbow room time! Then flap around your elbows and quack like a duck or chicken. Your baby will giggle, copy, and play the game to her hearts content!
I tell my 4 year old not to climb on me. He’s 50lbs and I got him used to it when I was pregnant by saying it hurt. He doesn’t climb on me anymore. However, he still has no personal space understanding and is basically a bull in a china shop.
Play the hoola hoop game! Pretend you both have your own hoola hoops on, and explain to her, that sometimes you want to have some quiet time in your hoola hoop, and when she’s reading or wanting her own quiet time, it’s OK to ask you to respect her hoola hoop space. Make it a game, and she’ll figure it out rather quickly. It teaches her that her boundaries are important to you as well. Win win! Xx
Go into the bathroom and lock the door … in a few years she won’t want to be around you and you will have lots of time to yourself … time flies … I only wish I had my children hanging on me …
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There is this funny word called “consent” that parents aren’t teaching their children. There is a huge difference between showing her love and affection by touch and her climbing in you like a jungle gym. They are never to young to learn that everybody has different boundaries. If you continue to allow her to cross boundaries with you then how will she ever know how to respect other people’s boundaries
Just teach her to ask if it’s ok to climb on you. That teaches her respect for other people’s space and body. And it gives you the control to say yes or not right now, mommy needs a little space. Try to remember these days won’t last. Wish you the best 
Has a kid. Complains kid loves her and wants to touch her. Smh
Y’all can stop being judge and unhelpful. She didnt ask for your opinion, she asked how to solve her problem.
Pregnant women have to teach their kids not to be rough and climb all over them. Its not the worst thing in this childs world.
Live with it and embrace your child. Cause when she gets older she won’t wanna play like she used to. Enjoy the time you have with her as a child, and a boyfriend isn’t gonna replace playing with mommy. Just saying.
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Give her to someone who won’t mind her climbing on them.
People are such assholes! I’m with you! I will plan art class, play games, jump on the tramp, go on walks. But I don’t like being hung on, and climbed all over. I do agree this phase will pass. My suggestion is to stand up. Make it so it’s a bit harder to be all over you. It’s easy to get overwhelmed but you got this! Just keep swimming
I can see from both sides. I, myself, don’t like being touched. Not even holding my hand. It just makes me feel yuck. So I limit it. Always have.
My kids may think I’m heartless (they don’t) but that’s okay. I have a daughter who is the same when it comes to touch too.
Then again I feel a lot of guilt because I know for a fact I am always going to regret the time I never hugged them, when I didn’t hold their hand…
I’m stuck between a rock and a hard place
I tell my 4yo all the time that mom needs “personal space”… then I explain how he can play next to me, I can play with him but he cannot climb on me or be rough with me. It’s a constant struggle to remind him but over time just saying mommy needs space is enough and gives me space and plays next to me instead of trying to sit on me.
You are as Cold as Ice. Your willing to Sacrifice HER Need
For Love. Please, Don’t Have Any More Kids, or Pets. You Are Way
TOO SELFISH. SAD 
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Play mate would help. My son never did this we had his playmate at my place or he would go play at his place. A neighbor. Find a play mate for him. Distract
Shit my daughter is going to be 7 this year. Hadn’t ended yet just ask your kid for a minute and then chill and unfortunately it will continue.
I have 5 kids, and yes there are days when it gets too much… but honestly, it’s not that bad, they have to go to bed sometime… also, I love that my kids want to be around me constantly, and touchy, loving… because they’re growing up, and soon they won’t want my hugs and kisses, they won’t want to spend time with me… then I’ll miss these days… so yes I sometimes get frustrated, but I’m soaking up as much love from them as I possibly can…
Just because you’re a parent, doesn’t mean you gotta be a ‘toy’ all the time. There are other ways to interact with your kids without all that rough-housing and whatnot. Find other ways to play with her that you both enjoy. I bet a lot of these ‘perfect mommies’ don’t just sit there and play with their kids every second. Just set boundries. Kids gotta learn to self-entertain as well, to utilize their imaginations. There’s nothing wrong with space. Tell your bf the same. Kids can be overwhelming, sometimes. Me-time is essential for our sanity.
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You have to
Set boundaries and tell her what u want-it will not happen overnight, but if u do it tactfully it will be a slow process and she will learn to understand. Just like anything else, u have to teach her what u want/need “honey come sit next to me instead of on top of mommy” “mommy loves you but i need you to not jump on me” u dont wana hurt her feelings…
Tell her that she needs to ask first before she climbs on you. Explain to her that sometimes you need personal space. There is nothing wrong with being touched out. Believe me. I have been there. And still am some days. I have a 2 year old that stopped breastfeeding 3 months ago, but she still has to sit on me all the time. And a 4 year old that is constantly climbing on me and other people to sit or play with them. It takes time. Just take it one day at a time
It’s definitely hard. It does get tiring sometimes. Mine is only 10 months and cries when she’s not touching me at all times. Even when playing with toys and stuff. It makes getting household chores and stuff really difficult
It’s a kid. That’s what they do. They want to play. Tell little one you don’t wanna play right now and that they are getting to big to hang out you, but that’s what they do.
I want my kids with me 24/7. I don’t mind them sitting on me or anything. But if I’m doing something that NEEDS to be done, I will tell them I can’t right now and will in a bit. If it’s something not that important I will play.
I am teaching my almost 4 year to sit next to me and cuddle rather than sit on me and climb all over me. I’ve also started to explain to him that sometimes I need “room to breathe” or “personal space” and I reassure him and tell him I love him very much but sometimes it gets too much and I just need a little time to sit by myself. He is learning slowly lol.
im sorry im not going to beat you up but i will be blunt… thats part of being a mom sorry but fact… youre their jungle gym, teddy bear, tissue, etc… you asked for this when you chose to become a mom… you child is turning 4… enjoy them wanting to love on and cuddle and play with you. this time wont last long …ENJOY IT. my kids are 19, 16, and 13… i wish for those days back where they just wanted to be up moms butt… now its all about friends boyfriends girlfriends etc… cherish these times while you still have them… maybe go talk to a therapist or something…
It’s hurts and is annoying now but trust me you will miss it. Soon enough she will start to get independent and want barely anything to do with you This is just a faze, Try to do crafts and more physical things to let her burn off some energy
It is so hard when you become sensory overloaded. It is a normal part of child development - look at other primates for examples of what it looks like. She is getting old enough that you can limit this, but she is still too little to eliminate. All the climbing and hanging is her returning to her security -you. She is checking in with you in a physical way.
My daughter is almost 9 and still won’t leave me alone 
I wouldnt have kids if i cant handle the normal it comes with 🤷
Kids are not everyone, you should not have kids just because they are cute or you feel like you should. Children are a lifetime commitment, from the moment you decide to have a baby you should be aware that you will be becoming more than just a mom. You will be a nurse, a teacher, a cook, a playmate, etc. Kids are messy and at the beginning you are basically like a slave, you take care of them, you feed them, you do everything for them, and in return you get to be the proud mom of amazing kids. All these things that you are complaining about will become memories that you will treasure forever. I have 2 boys, they’re 6 and 10, and even though they fight and they drive me crazy sometimes, I wouldn’t trade them for anything in the world. I love spending time with them, we watch movies, play with cars, and read books together. On the days when I’m having a bad day, I go to them and hug them and they ussually look and smile at me and my day magically gets better. Like I said before if you don’t, like children you shouldn’t have any.
My son is 8 and still does this 
. There are times where I just freak out because I can’t handle all the touching and hanging off me. Then I feel bad because he looks at me all sad and says “I just love you”. I’m currently 8 months pregnant so my patience with this is very thin. Sometimes I feel like he does it on purpose knowing it’s going to get on my nerves… I sympathize with you.
You are a saint for lasting as long as you have. My 1st is 9 months, I’m pregnant with my 2nd, and I feel the same way. This is a normal and healthy feeling.
My oldest son doesn’t like being touched either. He didnt even like holding my hand, not that he ran off he just doesnt like being touched, only on his terms like when he’s sick or feeling emotional.
You just say exactly that
Mommy needs space
Please ask first before you jump on mommy I dont like it
And you respect her the same
Ask before you help her or give her a hug or say can I kiss you goodnight, if she says no it’s no.
Nothing wrong with that and those saying suck it up and let her are assholes. There is absolutely nothing wrong with teaching your child about autonomy at an early age, just like you want her to know she has a right to tell someone she doesn’t want to be touched right now so do you. Use it as a learning experience. As for all you making her feel bad you’re ridiculous and judgemental jerks. Every person has a right to decide what to do with their body, yes even MOMS!
My youngest is 18 months and he is happiest when he is swinging from my arms or standing on my head …
It gets annoying at times but I just remove him and turn it into another game like pretending I’m a monster to chase him or hide and seek . He will eventually understand personal space
You will miss it I promise
Just an fyi it doesnt stop with age 
Shes at the age where learning to play properly is soooo very important. Teach her boundaries. Good luck
Tell her to get off of you. Simple. And if your boyfriend looks down his nose at that maybe he should experience it. Tell her to get off before you snap. You’re a person. She needs to learn to respect that it’s never too early.
I understand what you’re saying but in a few short years that will be over.My children are 51 and 45, it doesn’t happen that often,and believe me,you’ll remember when.
Please don’t have any more kids ffs
I’m almost 20 years old and I still sit in my mommas lap 
thankful she never turned me away , I know where I can go when I need to cry.
You should never had kids plain and simple!
don’t have kids if u dont like it
SELFISH they grow up you know and you will regret the day you said this.
My daughter is 7 and sometimes still does this. I just tell her ‘you’re to big already baby. That hurts’ or I’ll exaggerate ‘owwww’ and she gets the point. Her little brother is 2.5 and still does it but hes small so it doesn’t bother me but I still make it a point to tell him no also so he doesnt keep the habit.
She never said she didn’t want her daughter to touch her!! She didn’t say she didn’t like to cuddle! She didn’t say she doesn’t want to play with her daughter! Seriously! Read the post before you judge. Why does everyone have to be like this! Not everyone just the ones who are! I personally cannot handle the climbing and rough play either. Not because I don’t want my kids, not because I shouldn’t have had them, not because I don’t give them the touch they need! It’s because I have serious anxiety and claustrophobia and literally cannot handle the feeling! I go into a complete panic attack when I’ve had to much! My son is the same way. He is 4 yrs old. There are so many “perfect” on the front moms that can instantly judge anyone who gets real about stuff. I can almost guarantee that everyone of you has some issue of your own you are just to insecure to admit to. How dare anyone tell another mother they should not have had a child!!! If she was saying she beat her kid… different story. All she wanted was ideas to teach personal space which is something all kids should learn because every human, including you perfect moms, and children at some point need personal space and boundaries! What I do is explain that there are boundries and we all have to respect each other limits. I make sure everyone respects his when he reaches that point. You are perfectly ok with teaching your daughter your bounderies momma!
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Do not let these people get to you. It’s perfectly okay to teach your children about personal space and personal time. When they’re older they’ll want it too.
She is wanting something. Please don’t push her away. I’m not trying to make you feel guilty…but you may reget it. She is only 4 years old…she doesn’t understand your new relationship. Is her father in her life? Unless he is abusive or dead…he should be.