He’s entitled to is opinion. I’d just explain as long as it doesn’t effect him personally he just needs to let it go, meaning not to bully those who are. I personally would explain to him it’s okay not to personally like it, but ultimately it doesn’t effect him so he just needs to let it go.
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I don’t agree with heterosexual relationships. Just because you chose to be straight doesn’t mean I have to support it. I can judge you for being straight, as long as I’m respectful about it.
how dumb does that sound?!
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Let him believe what he does , as long as he doesn’t go around disrespecting people for who they are or what they like then it’s fine, it’s a society with a bunch of sexual orientations , and he needs to have tolerance and love for others no Matter who they are .
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I had a conversation once with a man who was against white ppl in general. I’m aboriginal and I hated that fact that he just said that. I told him that one day his child will grow up and possibly fall madly in luv with a white person. He said it’ll never happen. I said when that happens and if you don’t accept then you will lose your child. Then added what if your child is gay and omg he really didn’t like that. So regardless how your kid turns out, still your child and teach them it’s ok to feel like that but shouldn’t impose on others beliefs
I’d just ask him why he feels the way he does. Does he know any LGBTQI people? Did someone hit on him? Do guys at school make “jokes” about queer folk or use “that’s so gay” as a slur?
Is this sudden? Is it related to religion or someone he likes/looks up to? Just ask nicely, maybe while you’re taking a walk or something where he doesn’t have to look you in the eye. Don’t be upset, just leave the door open for more discussion later. Maybe also talk to him about which sources of info are most and least reliable and how to think critically.
I’d say invite any non-hetero friends over to socialize so he can actually meet someone and possibly ask questions (if it’s OK with your friend).
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Let him be himself and don’t make an issue out of it.
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Shun all appearances of evil
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Well first of all it is not “normal”…it is rare and extreme minority. I think most people who support it feel the need to call it normal…thinking that normal = acceptance, but you come off as deceitful right off the bat because your claiming a very low % thing is normal.
Teach them that all life is precious and deserving of respect, no matter color, sex, religion, etc…every person deserves respect whether you agree with them or not. Attacking someone even verbally with intent to cause emotional pain is being a crap person.
Your issue is you skipped the foundation and instead focused on a specific segment that was important to you…and you did it with a lie.
Simple…your boy is going into his own skin and opinions of his world. Let him …
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Let him feel that way then. Equally as valid.
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You can’t force him to think the way you do. He is allowed his own opinion even if he did hear things at school
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I would tell him he doesn’t have to support it he doesn’t have to think it’s not weird. But how he treats people is so important. He can choose to have his beliefs but he shouldn’t hate or treat the people that decide to live that lifestyle any worse than those who don’t live that lifestyle. Sexual identity doesn’t define you. And you shouldn’t be defined as a sexual orientation. You respect people for the people they are not for who they love.
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Meh. That sounds like it was an adult talking through his mouth. If he’s been raised the way you say there would be no reason for him to change his mind about something like that at the age of eleven. Most eleven year olds don’t even think about stuff like that.
I commend you for teaching love and not hate. Everyone has thier opinions which they are entitled to. But there is no need to be hateful about it or go beyond stating you dont agree with homosexuality.
I would explain to him that homosexuality is nature’s way of controlling the human population. How would he like it if someone judged his parents harshly for loving each other and adding to the population disaster that is this planet? He might have started to hate people for who they love, but soon people will start to hate him because he is full of hate.
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He has the right to feel however he feels about any situation.
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Y’all really mad because they “sin” differently than you?
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Show him anything about tolerance.
But. It’s his opinion… and everyone. Even 11 yrs old… are allowed. He doesnt have to like it. But he doesnt need to have that on his heart.
Your 11 year old most likely heard that from someone. Maybe he even voiced the words you told him about love is love around a group of his peers and they came back with “it’s weird and not ok” and made fun of him, which is very possible. & that made him feel bad so now he’s siding with them to avoid those negative emotions. Maybe just try to find out where that came from and go from there.
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I love that we are all insinuating that we need to teach our children respect, although barely anyone here can even respect everyone else’s opinions. #waytogoteam
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To me he doesn’t have to support it as long as he isn’t cruel or treats people differently solely because of their sexuality. He’s free to have his opinion, not everyone in this world agrees with how people live their lives and that’s fine.
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Acceptance or non acceptance are both valid. People can feel how ever they want to. It doesn’t matter how he feels because it’s his choice. The problem comes when someone chooses to be hateful and attack others in ways that are emotional or physical. That’s my opinion.
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Not supporting it and thinking it’s weird doesn’t equal hate you can love a person without agreeing with what they do or believe.
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Let him make his own mind up you can’t force him or he will just resent you and he won’t be open with you anymore about other issues because you can’t seem to understand or agree with anything other then your own opinions
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I pretty blunt with me kids and I am big on love it love and give/get respect kinda thinking… no one but God ( if u believe and if u don’t then no has the right) has the right to judge. So if I don’t like u it because ur personality was poor to me… and even then If I have to deal with u I’ll still do it as appropriately as possible depending ( for situation like work)
Have an adult conversation with him
Sit down and discuss it. Ask him in depth why he feels how he does and after hes done counter attack his reasons gently. Hes at a sensitive age.
Your son is 11y/0. He is too young to know what “love is love” because right now he is uncomfortable with any talk about love, most people equate love with sex, and what 11y/0 is comfortable with that. The best message you might give him or anyone else is” God doesn’t care who you love, just how you love”
Personally I think it’s more how he may have been raised…or something close to it…my kids have ALWAYS been that race,gender doesn’t matter as long as both are respectful and consenting and brings out the best in each other …my son 3 yrs ago had a little black girl he played with and there was a joke by my older sister about Keke being his girlfriend and he responded no she can’t be cuz she is black and pawpaw won’t love me and I told him screw what anyone thinks you can’t help you like,love,or enjoy spending time with…I also since then have taught then race doesn’t matter and gender iv told all my kids that I don’t care if they ever feel they may be attracted to the same gender as long as they are respectful and being respected and as long as they both are consenting to things and they bring out the best in each other…not the worst…iv seen some people completely lose success and motivated due to a relationship and lost most everything…and that I won’t support but race, gender I not picky and iv taught my kids to be respectful about it also…there is a women that dresses like a man at our local dollar general and my son asked me one day if he was a quire and I instantly stopped him and said no we will not be disrespectful to someone and there way of living I explained it was a women that felt she was a man and so she leads her life as if she were a man and that’s ok…I educate my kids on it… but there grandpa is very old fashion and he isn’t racist but thinks races should only be with there race. But I have taught my kids it’s ok to love any race or any gender and to be respectful to anyone that chooses a different way… I also let me kids know that if they ever feel like they are attracted to same gender or different race I am 100 percent supportive and to be open and not hide who they are from me or themselves but hatetread for gays or whatever is more a feeling taught or misunderstood or due to a situation that caused the outburst of an explanation of where they stand… I’d figure that part out first. Then inform him on the respectful way to handle it if it’s something he isn’t supportive of and if he is just defensive due to a personal issue then let him know it’s ok…but I think a plate of cookies…milk…an some time to sit and talk heart to heart to learn his side and correct or find a better way to go about things…good luck…
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I would just make sure he knows his feelings are valid and he doesn’t have to support or understand homosexuality as long as he doesn’t bully or disrespect gay people for their choices.
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I teach my boys the same way as you love is love. But like I tell them they dont have to like it but everyone should be respected as a human being. Love the person for who they are and not their choices in their life. Worry about there’s. Because you can’t change someone for it’s their life.
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First I would express my disappointment at him judging an entire Group of people based on such a hateful reason. Tell him that it’s absolutely not up to him to decide who other people get to love. He wouldn’t want someone telling him who he has to care for or whom he can love . It’s not weird just because he doesn’t necessarily understand it and it absolutely is normal and many people are homosexual and that is a fact of life . He doesn’t get to decide what is and isn’t okay in the sexual lives or preferences of other people. He doesn’t have to be in gay spaces or have a gay best friend but hate and dehumanizing people won’t be tolerated. Love is love. It should be celebrated because there isn’t enough in the world so it is our job to give it and celebrate it when we can not diminish it or try and take it away from others. I would tell him I love him and it’s ok if he doesn’t understand other people always , but he should seek to understand or at least respect and empathize and not judge. At least that’s what I would tell my son.
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The more you push, the harder they pull. Don’t give it any play and it will most likely fade.
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I don’t see the problem .his opinion is that it’s weird so what …that’s his opinion …or are you the type that only your opinion is right …as long as he not disrespectful to their face he’s entitled to his feelings and opinions
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For the idiots thinking that Jesus with the 12 apostles is anything like this you are SICK and approaching the gate of hell quickly enough God create a man and woman Adam and Eve not Adam and Steve laying with same sex is and always will be a sin
Just teach him not to hate. He will realize his ignorance on his own. All part of growing up
I don’t know that I would teach him “it’s normal”. I would teach him that everyone is different and we should be accepting of people’s differences.
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Ask him why he feels this way(usually they have heard it from someone). When my son felt this way(his father is homophobic) I used examples using his friends names, for example. I said “if ______ came to you and said, I think I am gay, would you stop being his friend?” His answer was no. So I said then what’s the problem, he is still your friend. When he questioned going to the pride parade because 'people will think I am gay(again his fathers teaching) I told him that I go every year and does that make me gay? He says no, so I taught him that the reason we go is to show our support for people being whatever they want and we will love them anyway. It is all about explaining why his feelings are valid but so are everyone else’s. At that age they need guidance for their thoughts, so that they can make up their own minds.
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You cannot force him to accept the lifestyle, you can only teach him not to judge or be hateful and cruel.
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He’s allowed to feel the way he feels!!! You can guide him in the right direction and try to teach him that it’s okay and normal but he’s gonna feel how he wants! And that’s okay!
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The less of a big deal you make it the less he will focus on it. My son is only 7 right now, but he will be taught that everyone is different and nobody is perfect or right. Men love men, women love women, men love women and women love men. It’s not a big deal, and everyone chooses their own path.
Don’t make it more complicated than it is.
Your children, all our children for that matter, should respect people’s choices. You don’t have to support it - but one does have to respect it. Someone’s sexual preference is private and although some just can’t seem to understand that a human being is comprised of so many facets and not just one, we all have the right to live our life as we choose so long as it does not cause harm to others or incorporate illegal activity. No one has the “right” to do that.
So teach your son to respect all people. There is no right or wrong with sexuality. It’s a choice. I don’t have to support people’s personal choices but I do have to respect them.
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Smart kid lady Leave him alone
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Unsupported opinion but i really dont care.
- Being gay is not normal and you cant force him to think that it is
- Just cause he said its weird does not mean he is spreading hatred. He stated his opinion which was he could never accept it and frankly he doesnt have to. He is entitled to his feelings and opinion just like everyone else.
- Coming from a christian belief he shouldn’t (not saying that he does any of this) bully them, make fun of them, pick on them, or judge them but he does have to realize that whether we agree or disagree the LGBTQ community is here and is not going anywhere but they are still people and still human and they have feelings as well so we want to love the person and accept the person but DO NOT accept the sin. Its okay if he has feelings that it is wrong or etc. That is his opinion but don’t let him spread hatred.
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I agree with ur son
He’s not hating for not accepting. He’s entitled to his own opinion. U have ur opinion. I doubt u will change his mind
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It would help if you had gay or lesbian friends or neighbors…
Ignore the bigots on here, OP. At 11 yro he didn’t lick his stance off the ground. I’ve got a son myself and I know there is a lot of stuff going on amongst schoolboys and friends regarding homosexuals. Perhaps his friends told him it’s this or that in a negative way. It happens. Be patient, don’t push your point too much until he’s more mature.
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Tell him that it’s fine that he may not agree with everyone’s lifestyle but it’s not ok to hate people that are living their best life.
Teaching your kids not to hate is a always a good idea, no matter your feelings on the situation. He’s at the age where he is going to form his own opinions, just spread positivity and hope he has the kind heart you raised him to have.
Just make sure you tell him what the Bible says.
It’s ok not to like but not ok to treat anyone bad. I would just talk to him about it tell him its not right to judge others but its perfectly ok if its not his thing. In this world of so much hate it takes nothing to be kind. I wouldn’t just keep talking about it but if you were ever come to that subject or ever arould anything like that be kind about it, kids watch how you treat ppl and learn from that. It sounds like you are already doing a wonderful job , keep it up mama.
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There might be some internalized feelings there. I don’t know your son but maybe somebody was cruel to him (at school etc) for “acting gay” or perhaps he feels uncomfortable because he has feelings he hasn’t sorted out yet? 11 is a rough year. As long as you remain open and continue to have a welcoming outlook toward all persons and remind him often we can’t dislike people just based on things they cannot change and like you said love is love, I am sure he’ll come around eventually.
Teach him that it’s okay that he feels that way but not okay to be unkind !
Its not NORMAL, it an ALTERNATIVE life style
Let him have his opinion. He isnt hurting anyone
Keep talking. Keep educating. Be kind, listen to understand, not respond, but never waver
Just tell him that everyone has a right to be happy and find love and that it may be weird to him but if it doesn’t involve him it’s not his business
Morgen Flores. Can I list scriptures backing up my comment someone asking
He probably just saying that because one of his friends at school said that. I would just talk to him and tell him that he is entitled to his beliefs, but teach him that it is never ok to degrade, disrespect, or be mean to someone with different beliefs than him. He will grow out of this “opinion”. At 11, kids are at a very suggestible age and just want to fit in. If a friend at school feels this way, he will say he does too so that this friend will like him.
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You talk to him. You sit and listen …find out why he feels that way. You can’t force him to feel the way you do. But you can talk to him about why you feel that way you do. I’ve always talked about the person in our life that we know who is gay…and why their being gay has zero to do with why we love them. We love people for who they are, and what is on the inside. And don’t bas our opinions on race, religion, or sexuality. You get to know someone and try to treat everyone with respect bc you would want that from them. Just be honest and open.
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Show him to respect everyone no matter their sex, race, religion, or sexual orientation. I have always raised my kids to support everyone. Find out the reason why he is against them. Find out why it’s weird to him. And I honestly believe so many people are against it because it’s weird to them as well. But also don’t force him to accept this. I just let me kids know we have family members and we love them even more because of all the Hate.
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If I were you, i would respect his opinion on this. Everyone has their opinions on this topic and that is okay. However, you should tell him you still expect him to be kind and respectful regardless. Just because he has a different opinion doesn’t mean he gets to be rude, disrespectful, or just awful to those in this community (it’s also a good lesson for him to be kind and respectful to everyone else who has different opinions on other things too) 
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EVERYONE needs love-to give and to receive. However they choose to love is up to them but NEVER hate. Use the analogy, some people really enjoy eating sushi while others might not like it at all. That’s ok. But it’s never ok to shame someone for liking something you don’t. What a boring world it would be if we were all the exact same!
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It is entirely possible that your 11 year old is harbouring some same-sex attraction and has heard his friends say something similar. Therefore in a desperate attempt to not feel alone or like he’s going to lose his friends, he’s saying the same thing. Believe it or not a lot of hate comes from internalised homophobia. Kids have a real fear of being ostracised and will sometimes say anything to cover their own backs
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Come on…the CHILD is 11 years old! The LGBTQ+ community can be very confusing to some straight adults just imagine how an 11 year old feels? Boys identify as girls, girls identify as boys, some identify as neither or both, pronouns he, him, she, her, them, they. He probably cannot absorb it all so he’s lashing out. Give the kid a break and allow him to grow up some and hopefully he will have a better understanding of it all.
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Your on the right track , it is OK that he dosnt support it but treats them respectfully as he would treat anyone else. To do otherwise is telling him he is not entitled to an opinion and what he thinks does not matter.
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My daughter did the same thing. It was her grandfather’s beliefs that tarnished her beliefs. My daughter and I always had deep conversations about sexuality and love. I allowed her to find herself and her beliefs. Love your self first and you will see the love in everyone. No matter their race, gender, creed or orientation. She now identifies as pan sexual. I respect her and her grandfather has no choice but to respect her as well. I will not tolerate any discrimination.
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God has given us truth in our hearts and we are created in His image, let your son respond to his own convictions is my advice. I agree to always love people and be kind, but I don’t condone with the lifestyle that goes against us being “created as man and woman”. But I will never show hate or anger to anyone who chooses to live that way, as I also have my own sins I fight against daily so I am no better then anyone else.
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You don’t need to teach a 11 year old about gay relationships let him be a kid thats just honestly weird.
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My oldest has said its weird for 2 guys… but I have worked out thats because he doesn’t see it…
So my niece is gay and he sees her with her gf. And he is completely fine and understands thats her partner and they love each other. But when he randomly sees to guys his a little weirded out which is just because he doesn’t see it.
So I try to watch movies that have gay people or when talking about relationships putting all genders in it so he can hear its just the normal. I dont say husband and wife. I try to say all genders.
My theory is if he sees it and hears it as just a normal conversation then it will just become the normal.
His not against it at all though he just finds it a little weird.
I also teach my kids that we judge people on the way they treat us not who their partner is.
Also I think some school play a part in this. I’ve had my kids come home and say only men and women can marry… because thats what they learnt at school. Or only women can have babies.
This is when I’ve sat them down explaining we marry who we want aslong as they want to marry us and everything is age appropriate.
There’s other ways to have babies like adopt etc. And aslong as you have loving parents it doesn’t matter what gender they are.
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That’s simple. Have him put himself in their shoes. For example. If he has curly hair ask him how would he feel if he was told that people with curly hair ate weird and should be outcast , not accepted and mistreated. Ask him how would that make him feel?. It’s all a matter of perspective and it will teach him to not follow opinions that feel wrong. He should trust your loving explanation and not fall into the racist trap. That’s my opinion. As a mom of a multicultural family we give and promote only love. When outside influence is noted we correct it immediately.
Hate is a learned thing. Not to say he learned it from you, but there are a lot of haters out there that influence those who don’t understand. Keep being a positive force in his life. Pray for those haters. Ignorance is also a learned thing. Knowledge is too.
My guess is he’s heard it from school. Just keep reiterating that it’s ok and normal and hopefully as he gets older he can see that it is.
Just remind him that while he feels this way at the moment it is in no way ok to bully or pick on anyone who is because of his feelings.
It is okay to disagree with a thing, this is what he is doing. However always be sure to be a person who loves ppl despite differences.
I’ve always taught my kids to treat people the way they want to be treated no matter their religion,color of their skin or who they choose to have a relationship with…. We all bleed the same red blood 
,feelings and souls … no one is better than another and each human being makes their own free will choices of how they want to live … hate n mean spiritedness has no place in how you treat others we have no right to judge … that’s not our job …
Sounds like something his friends have said or even possibly that there are bullies who are calling him that and it’s making him feel bad and weird about himself… The only thing you can do is create a home with a space of tolerance… It is ok to tell him that hate and ignorance will not be tolerated. Maybe even take them to a pride parade near you… This is pride month after all!! Just keep guiding him and it will all fall into place… Statistically though you are bound to have one messed up kid by no doing of your own… it just happens that not all of our brains are wired the same way…
I would start by having a conversation about where this feeling is coming from because if you’ve always taught them to be accepting, there has to be a reason he’s all of a sudden feeling this way.
My Dad always taught me " there are good white men, there are good black men, there are bad white men there are bad black men" . I have always lived my life by those words, and in my heart it applies to all human beings and aspects of life. It’s the character of a person and HOW they live their life. Honestly, when you first meet a new person do you think to yourself " I wonder what they do in bed?" Or are you assessing " is this a kind person, someone I would like in my life circle?" If you live your life this way #1 you will be able to add lots of really wonderful in your life and 2, you won’t be burdened with how other people live. If it’s not your life style. Just walk on. Don’t forget you ARENT GOD.
I would open up a dialog and ask him what makes him think that? He may not actually believe it but heard it elsewhere and is looking for guidance. Ask him if he thinks everyone should be treated with respect and kindness. A preacher I heard talked about racism by saying let anyone who had anything to do with the color of their skin raise their hand! His point was if we are all God’s children then we are all brothers and sisters and all equally loved and worthy. If you are not religious the teachings that say our highest human aspiration is to live a life of compassion and loving kindness. Teach your son that judging people for who they are rather than by what they do is wrong. I would also get him focused being the best he can be himself and not following the crowd or listening to other people. In his heart he knows what is right. In this family we treat everyone with loving kindness.
Everyone has their own opinion. If he isn’t being mean to anyone and keeps his options to himself then there is no issue.
Hes probably been told from peers how it’s wrong, id ask him if he’s gotten that from his friends and teach them just cause your friends thinks it weird doesn’t mean you have to, and to teach him not to judge or bully ppl that are different by giving him examples of what if this happened to you, would you like it type of thing.
Perhaps he is uncomfortable with his own sexual identity and needs to resolve that.
You just be okay with it? Tell him not to be ugly but also you need to let him for his own opinion. It’s okay to not be okay with people who believe in same sex relationship and it’s okay to believe it. Everyone is valid to what they choose, just don’t be hateful about it.
My nephew is like this and we try to show him that it’s ok but u can’t force them. Just show them that it’s not about them.
Just because I think some thing is wrong based on the bible, doesn’t mean I hate. I don’t have to agree with someone but don’t try to force me to agree with you. I don’t hate.
You can also expose him to education at home, showing him the wonderful diversity of the world. Mister Roger’s, Pee Wee’s Playhouse, Lady Gaga, Billy Porter, Elton John, Boy George, whatever you think is appropriate. Kids learn what we show them. IMHO being gay is like being blue-eyed or left-handed. It is not a “matter of opinion” to be born one way or another. Teach him to be open minded, considerate, and to think for himself and follow the good values you teach at home.
Can’t change people’s minds just tell him to be kind ,and keep his opinions to himself,they aren’t hurting him.
Just tell him that they dont choose. Theie sexualty it what they were born with most would rather to not be eithdr but it what was dealt out to tbem at birth
dealt th
I’m gay and out to all my family, I have a younger half brother who is 12, who’s been taught that their are all different kinds of families etc, but recently when I visit him he has been picking up bullshit from kids at his school, and I can guarantee you it comes from fathers with toxic attributes when it comes to teaching and understanding homosexuality or even just teaching that some people love differently. There are so many Dads that will say “I’m ok with gay people I just don’t want my son to be gay” and as a gay man I agree with that but only because I KNOW what the struggle is like, but the father saying that is seeing it from a perspective of “oh no he’s going to be feminine, and everybody will judge him and me for raising him” - that is what is screwed and hard for people to deal with. People want to preach equliaty and acceptance but when and if it comes to their kids they want to throw the “are you sure you’re gay?” Out there, not for the childs state of mind, but for the parent to start accepting. It is not your fault as a parent, and I personally believe that kids should be shown and taught that ALL kinds of relationships exists and flourish just as great as the next; it is the people that make a relationship whole; not the outsiders who point fingers. I would advise you speak to the school tbh personally; because the more parents approach it that way; the more normalised it becomes eventually.
you don’t need to just read your Bible your son is right. If it was a sin in the beginning it’s a sin now. Out of the mouth of babes comes the truth.
Weird…my parents never talked to me about gay issue, about transsexual issue, about pedophile issues, etc. And somehow I grew up and became wife, mother and doctor.
First off you need your head thumped for telling your son it’s normal. It’s one thing to be kind to all people, but your son is absolutely right, and you need to encourage your son to be just like he is. He is not ok with it and that’s just fine.
Talk talk & talk . I’m sure he got this from the young boys club. Should discuss with school & teachers. Tolerance must be teach at home & schools.
Ask him why he supports hetero people, and go from there.
i have some gay friends even thou i dont agree with it i respect them teach him wven thpu he doesn’t agree with it teach him to respect them
Love him for standing up for what he believes just as you do.
Kid is pretty smart.
Remember one thing. Hate is taught .
How about teaching your kids to respect everyone but not telling them being gay is normal because it’s not. Don’t normalize such things at a young age. He can respect them and not support them. Respect and support are two different things.
That’s a conversation for him to be having with his father or a straight man…but respect is still do to everyone being respectful
Leave it alone…at this point.
You’ve taught him as well as you can.
Continue to be you.
Live the example
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The way I taught my daughter was, I asked her if she could control who she did & didn’t have feelings for… when she said no I said neither can anyone else… you don’t get to pick what you are or aren’t attracted to and condescending how horrible ppl who are gay are treated by some, it definitely isn’t a " choice " and hating anyone for something they have no control over is wrong