How can I tell my kids about our dog that died?

Here’s a question that might help some other people going through something similar. We had a puppy who didn’t appear as sickly as she was. She had a bone disorder and didn’t react to pain. After an x-ray at the vets, the decision was quickly made to euthanize. We have a son who is four years old and heartbroken, having lost his best friend. What does other mama’s tell their children when such a tragedy occurs?

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I told my daughter our dog went to heaven. It still hurts but she likes the idea of being watched over by her dog

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Tell they they are no longer in pain they are with God and jesus in heaven he will see him again someday

I got my son another puppy and just explained that his dog was sick and he had to go to heaven.

The truth kinder in the long run gone to doggy heaven

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There is a book called The Heaven of Animals. Helped my daughter alot when our dog died.

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Watch all dogs go to heaven

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We have lost 2 dogs since my daughters been alive. Shes 7yrs old as of now. One she doesn’t remember and the other she does. The one she rembers we told her the truth the dog died and went to doggie heaven. Because ya know All dogs go to heaven. We buried him in the yard and she will take flowers to his grave randomly. She was 5 when we put him down. He was old and sick and thats what we told her.

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I just had to tell our kids the day after Christmas that our cat died. They’re 4.5 and 3 so they don’t really understand. But I told them she was old and it was time for her to go to kitty heaven.

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Our situation is different as my Louscious was our 1st baby and is now 12 years old and he’s a purebred so more issues as well. But we have been preparing our girls for about a year now. They know he’s old and they have to be more gentle and calm around him now, they know he’s in pain sometimes from the hip dysplasia and arthritis and they know some day soon we’ll have to take him in and he won’t come home with us. I just told my baby he will go to heaven where he doesn’t hurt anymore and he’ll be with all the people we love and miss that are there also. I don’t believe lying to kids benefits them but especially in serious situations, but to each their own🤷‍♀️ I know my girls will still be very upset and take it hard when he does but I know they won’t be blindsided so I think it will be easier.

My daughter was same age . I explained that she is in heaven. But what a lucky puppy she is as she can play with the angels everyday. I also told her if she miss puppy she can blow her kisses to heaven. And every night she can see her in the sky with the stars.
She was teary eyed but she was happy with the answer

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Tell him about the rainbow bridge. How beautiful it is there and how happy the dog is there. Remind him his passing was pain free and was the best thing for him even tho it might be hard for him to understand right now. Frame a picture and hang the collar off of it. Encourage love and remembrance… he can draw pictures for the puppy or write a letter to heaven for his pup with you… I’m so sorry.

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The truth. Unfortunately death is a part of life. When our kitten died (my son was just almost 5)
We sat him down and explained that dobby (the kittens name) was really sick and he died. We explained that his body couldn’t work any more. That his body was no longer alive but his spirit went to heaven. He was pretty confused at first to be honest.
Once he started to understand and it really upset him…
We printed out a picture for him to keep. I also had this fuzzy blanket with a kitten on it (I’d had the blanket since i was his age) and i gave him that.

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The truth, and tie into the circle of life and how beautiful it can be. Sorry for your loss.

Tell them puppy was too good a dog that he was given wings and is in puppy heaven watching over him…and then tell him you’ll are going to the animal shelter to adopt a puppy in need of a loving home.

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Im not religious per se but i always tell my kids that it went to heaven to live with our ancestors who needed him more than we did.

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You tell you’re children that the dog died!:eyes:

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We lost our shep when my son was 4 he was sad! We read him a book about when dogs go to heaven, we watched “all dogs go to heaven” and my mom got him a stuffed animal that looked just like our Dozer with a collar on it that said Dozer! He’s 7 now and still loves that dog like he’s his everything! We were all heart broken and it wasn’t long before we turned around and got another one cause our house felt so empty!

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The truth, we grew up on a ranch and my parents were brutally honest with us. When we lost an animal we were told then we had to go on about our day. It sounds harsh but honestly it has helped me to learn how to cope with any lost in my life from animals to the people I love. It’s a life skill I am very thankful for.

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I told my kids their dog went off and got married - I just could not tell them the truth😪

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Tell 5hem the truth unfortunately this is life and they have to understand that these things happen my kids were heartbroken we have lost 3 dogs over the years lots of loves and hugs and let them know they were really sick and now they are no longer hurting but running free with other dogs having fun

Our dog died almost 2 years ago. She was 10 years old and developed CHF that quickly turned terminal. She had been around the entire time our children had been alive and also through my teenage years. My daughter was 4 when she died. I wouldn’t have said she was devastated but she did notice when our dog was no longer around. And all I could do was be honest “our dog died, she got very sick and wasn’t strong enough to fight it off” That’s all I think you’ll be able to do is be honest and use age appropriate explanations and answer any questions your child has.

I’m my situation we had gotten my fathers puppy, my father passed away may 1 2017, and shortly after lucey got sick, started to have seizures, when we had gotten her to the vets it was already too late… she had to be put to sleep and coming home and explaining it to our son was one of the most difficult things I had to do, but I explained to him that what happened to papa (my dad) is what happened with Lucey, & sometimes it takes doctors help to make the process easier but Lucey joined papa up in the moon with the stars so that they both can watch over us everyday.

I keep it honest. Explain the pet was sick and he had to go to heaven, or hed be in too much pain.

Sorry for your loss as well❤️ they’re a part of the family

I’m not sure of your beliefs, but we told our kids that our dog was just so sick that medicine couldn’t help her. We told them she went to be God’s dog so he could make her better since we couldn’t. We had her cremated and while we have her physical body with us here, her soul is in Heaven healed and waiting on us to come. They were happy that she feels better now. No tears :heart:

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Kids handle it pretty well. You should just go with the truth in a kid friendly way. Learning to cope with death at a young age is very beneficial later in life.

We just recently had to put a very loved dog down. Just sit down with him and explain that the puppy is in heaven and not sick anymore. Make sure you explain that it was a sickness that people can’t get or he might think he will get sick too. Just love him. But explain it to him in an easy way. Kids understand more than we think they do. I’m so sorry about your pup :sob:

Talk about rainbow Bridge, there is also a book called Dog Heaven (I havent read it, but I read the Cat Heaven version to our daughter when our cat died). They might have it at your library (our library was really helpful and we found several books)

Just like you would tell them like their Grandma or Grandpa died. God needed them more. If able adopt a shelter dog. :dog:

It is better to be honest with them, and at this age they will accept it easier and move on. My daughter was 4 and 5 when we lost our family pets. She was with us on one of them and she seemed to understand more than i expected her tk

I just had to put my for baby down the day after Christmas so I just went through this and it broke my heart and now everyday my almost 4yr old son says he misses her. It’s harder for us as adults to deal with it than the kids it seems. He saw her sick and he knows I had to bring her home in a box that he couldn’t open and that she is forever sleeping in the back yard. Tell him the truth in a way he can understand and he will process it in his own way.

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Oh…I’m so sorry!! I would be honest in a way he will understand. It is terribly sad but helping him now learn how to be sad, yet remember the good times and have you there to guide him will only help him to cope better in the future. Don’t be afraid to teach your son its OK to be sad. We as parents are the ones who help them learn :slight_smile:

When our puppy passed away it was hard on everyone. I told my kids whenever they needed extra love, hugs, kisses, or just to talk that I was always for it. They never did until one day my daughter asked if everything you had on earth went to heaven with you. I told her yes and she said she will see our pup in heaven when she gets there. :sob::sob:
We also talked about heaven and no pain there and unlimited things that our pup has there.
Either way its gonna be hard as hell for everyone. Honesty just worked really well for us.

Death is a natural part of life. My parents never sugar coated death. They didn’t lie or make up stories. And I’m glad they didn’t.
We are Ojibways from Ontario and in our culture death is as normal as life.
Yes we were sad, yes we have heartache, yes we need to be comforted. It’s all normal.
The younger they learn, the more they understand. You can’t lie or tell fake stories if you want your children to be able to cope.
Start now.

Ik this pain all too well. I had a cat I found at 5 weeks old in bush in the pouring rain. I kept him, took him to vet got him all fixed up and healthy. Then as he grew, I noticed he was not ur typical cat. I took him back to the vet & he was diagnosed with ‘feline CH’…IF u dont know what that is Google/YouTube it lol it is very strange. He was only with me for a few short years before his disorder took over Completely. After a year of having him, I became pregnant. When I had my daughter my cat Rori, instantly LOVED her. They were best buds. I’d even refer to him.as ‘brother’. When the time came for me to end his misery, the vet came to my home and put him down in my arms. After that I took him to our local funeral home and had him cremated. And I purchased a BEAUTIFUL urn for his ashes. He was also cremated with his favorite blanky. It was and still is extremely hard, but it broke my daughters heart. However, me now have HIM^^^ on a cute little shelf up high in my living room. He is home with us every single day. And having his ashes makes things a little more easy bc he is technically still here with us. My daughter knows he is there and I explained cremation to her and EXACTLY what happened and why it needed to happen. Ever so often I grab his urn and shell give it a little kiss. :heart: ik this may be too late for u option wise but for anyone in the future, this was the best option for me AND my child. I love and miss my cat more than anything and so does my little one. But our boy is still here with us watching from that shelf​:heart:

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We had our chihuahua cross and Kelpy before my son was born chihuahua was going on 15 and Kelpy 9.
They were my son’s best friends from the moment he was brought home from the hospital. My son is now 4 in March.
In September my chihuahua had to be put down due to cancer, we told our son that pup pup is old and needs to go to dog heaven. But I told him U can talk to her when ever U need too.
In December we woke up to what looked like a murder scene in our backyard blood every were it was coming from our Kelpy bindi, rushing her to the vets they couldn’t save her we found out some one rat baited her, we told my son again that she’s in dog heaven running wild with her sister puppup

My son whos now 7 grew up with guineapigs and rats. Everytime one passed away I told him theyre in heaven now and on the night we’d go outside and i’d show him the brightest star I could find and tell him that star is the animal looking down on him from heaven and that theyre eating all their favourite food running around a huge field with all the other animals in heaven. Now when he misses them he looks at the stars and knows theyre still their looking down on him and he talks up to the stars

We lost our horse back in March he fell and slid into a tree fracturing his pelvis. There’s literally nothing they can do for that or even guarantee he would be sound once it healed. He was 30. Based on that I made the call…as hard as it was. We were just super honest with my son. Told him that Chandler died, he got hurt so badly the vet couldn’t fix him. It’s been rough, Chandler was his buddy, but I honestly think honesty is the best policy here.

Make a memory box with him I did with my old man and my nephew’s we put pictures in the box his brush and a few drawings of us all in there … Means that he can look in it to see the happy times xxx

I was a sensitive kid with tons of pets and had many funerals. If that was your only pet and his only dog, explaining it and keeping the collar and having a funeral might help but also what helped me as a teenager when we put down my 13 year old dog that I grew up with, was we went to the shelter and I picked out another dog, honestly I’m still upset about losing my childhood dog but I can’t imagine living with no dog at all and just the quiet empty backyard would be a constant reminder. Maybe let your 4 year old help pick the next dog and his new best friend

I lost my best friend this past June 24,19. And her birthday was yestersay1/2/20 and mine today 1/3/20. She was my therapy dog which turned into my daughter fur daughter. I had her before my grandson was born. He grew up with her and now turned 5 in july 24 and she past June 24,19. I had her creamated and when he misses her I take her box down and let him sit with her for awhile. I also told him that when he sees a white butterfly it’s her saying that she loves him. Because she was his buddy she slept with him ever time he came to visit she protected him. I also told him about Rainbow bridge and he told me he wishes that she would back at him like she use to. So I found a video for him with her it helps. But there really is no way to do it for everyone because everyone is different and process things differently. I wish you good luck . Explain Rainbow Bridge to them it helps and there is a poem print it out for your family frame it with the picture and something special to the baby you lost read it it helps you too. :cry::heart::hugs:

Explain to him that the puppy was sick and in pain, but now he isn’t suffering anymore and he is in puppy heaven watching over all of you

Me and my husband told our kids the truth we sat them down told them how and what happen and ask them if they as any questions we read them stories and show them the grave and let them bring flowers I even let them carry her favorite dog toys to school. I didn’t just get rid of all her dog stuff I let it stay out and in time slowly put them up. It seems to help they ask questions every day and got lots of cuddles

He went to puppy heaven

Tell them the truth…
Sometimes people and pets get sick. Some are born sick. Some get sick early on and some a bit later. Some people and pets live to be 100 years old before they get sick. And we can’t pick which happens, but when it does, they can’t be here on earth with us anymore. Their body gives up, and they have to say goodbye. But like when we say goodbye to anyone, no matter how long we will be apart, we still think about them and we miss them, and we keep loving them. And that’s nice for us and for them too. Even though it hurts sometimes and we cry and we get angry that they had to go. But that hurt will get easier with time. And we will find new friends and pets to help us heal. That way we can eventually think of them and miss them and not be so sad. You can add religion in too if it helps. :woman_shrugging:
Kids get it.

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We told them the truth and explained to the best of our ability about death. We buried them and then let the kids say a favorite memory. Then we explained all dogs go to heaven and wait for us at the rainbow bridge.

Speaking plainly, simply and TRUTHFULLY is always the best bet. Death will happen many times to people over the course of their lives; pets, friends, family members. They will see it on TV and in movies. When we shield our children from it we are doing them a huge disservice because they can handle it and they can, in their own way, understand.
I have thanked my own mother many times for always exploring death with me. From looking at dead animals on nature walks, to seeing my grandparents in the hospital, to going to the viewing at the funeral home. All things must die and it’s simply a fact of life. It’s hard, it hurts but it mainly hurts just for us and things will get to a new normal at some point. Thanks to my mom being so open, so accepting of grief and allowing me my pain I notice a distinct difference between my own ability to process death and most people I know. I had no qualms about ushering my aunt (who was like a second mother to me) through her death process and cleaning and dressing her after. I worked in an assisted living and found I was one of only a couple people on staff who would go into the rooms of the hospice patients to spend time with them.
We can’t fear death. We can’t hide it or hide from it. It just is and it’s part of life. A pet dying is an opportunity to teach a major life skill on a smaller scale, before it’s grandma or Grandpa or their cousin, etc. Just be honest.

We got this book for our daughter and a picture frame with the rainbow bridge poem with a picture of the two of them together. It seemed to help. That and just being honest and comforting.

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Tell them the dog died and that its a natural part of life…

We told them truth. Death is part of life. Keeping it very very simply said is what helps. Allow them to grieve and share fun memories together.
Ect…“remember that time when the dog ____, and we all had so much fun. And we laughed. What a good dog”.
Keep it positive.
Allow them to feel the pain and express it.
Watch the movie "All dogs go to heaven ".

I just told my kid straight out that our dog was sick, and had to be put to sleep. No one lives for ever. She now has a real look on death, as something heartbreaking but yet beautiful thing. She is now 7.

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I tell them the truth about what happened. Answer whatever questions the child has.

Tell him the truth always. But not detail for detail… Pup was sick and in lots of pain and because of everything the pup died,

Always tell the truth. Have a little pup funeral, even. That helped my 4 yr old son when his fish died. I even take him to real actual graveyards sometimes to walk around. In my opinion those things need to be made not scary…they are a part of life :woman_shrugging:t3:

When our dog died when I was like 5 or 6, my mom got me a stuffed animal dog that looked just like him. It helped me a lot. I took that thing everywhere with me!

2 of our rabbits died, one got sick and died at home, the other had diabetes to the point he was becoming lame and was pts. We buried them near each other in the front yard they picked a plant to put over the bodies. So they can talk to them whenever they would like. I’m also putting my dog down today, he has cancer. I’ve offered to them to come with me to the vets to say good bye. I’m getting him cremated.

In heaven running in God’s field of flowers as you know all dogs go to HAVEN.

The truth the dog was sick and died. Children handle these things better then us. We told my son at 3

Personally I would say the truth but refer to it as forever sleeping and find a star and tell him that’s your puppy …

Sorry for your loss :heart:

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just went through this, my kids and dog grew up together and the dog passed away befor thanksgiving this year
we told them that shes in heaven now and her angle is with them and when the time is right, she would send them a new friend to love
we got them a pup for christmas and he acts just like her lolol

One of our cats got ran over and I just told him the truth and told him he was in Heaven now.

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Honesty is the best policy.

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Our dog ran away, worried 6 yr old I explained he probably found a girlfriend and went to go start a family with her…

Truth is probably best, but you have to remember these kids believe in santa and the easter bunny so you gotta work it to the age appropriate level and not worry them with death

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My mum died when the kids were young and then their fish. I told them that everyone has a soul and a body. When somebody dies it means their body stopped working. Sometimes bodies stop working when they’re very old or really really sick. I told them that their soul, meemaws and swimmys, went to go to heaven where they last forever, but they’re body on earth doesn’t last, so we burry it so we can remember them until we go to heaven too. My older two, 4 and 3 understand that they’re with Jesus and bodies are temporary.

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Tell them that the puppy was very sick and needed to go back to Heaven (if you’re religious) so that the puppy won’t be hurting anymore. On similar lines if there are grandparents or others whom have passed, you can tell the children that those people are taking care of the puppy in Heaven.

We had to put our kitten down that was about 7 months old. He got into somthing toxic and by the time he started showing he was sick it was to late. My oldest is 4 we told him Micky got sick and went to sleep. He grandparents told him he went to heaven. Every once in a while he comes to me and say he misses micky or will ask if he will see him again. He is young be honest but know he probably wont fully understand also.

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The truth but put it gently. Make it ok but don’t lie. Also because other kids get told different things, tell him everyone has a way of dealing with sadness and grief so don’t tell others that things aren’t how they think. Just be honest with him and let him be sad and when the time comes for him to want another pet he’ll understand the responsibility a little more. He’s 4 not stupid. Give him a little bit of fantasy, all dogs go to heaven and his dog is with other dogs and watching over them. Same thing you would say if grandma passed away.

Our dog died when my daughter was five years old. She grew up with him and was really upset, she cried a lot. We told her the dog died and went to heaven, where everyone goes to when their time has come, so the dog isn’t alone. It helped her understand in a way, she handled it better than I expected. Honesty is really the best thing, as long as you keep your explanation suitable for children :wink:

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We recently lost our family dog - I told my four year old that she was poorly so went to become a star in the sky - we often go out and have a look at her - she is the brightest star - our gold fish is a tiny star and my dads dog is the fattest star !!! It has worked for us- he understands that sadly when you become a star you can’t come back because it is so so far away xx

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The truth. Never lie to your kids.

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My family dog died when I was in 9th grade and my siblings were in elementary my mom just told us he died in his sleep and we went to bury him in the back yard and Shar our favorite memories of him it was a sad time but after awhile it gets better a couple months later my mom got a new puppy

I’ve just been through losing my dog on new years eve. My 3 year old daughter had known our dog her whole life. I was honest with her but vague on the details. I said that our dog was too poorly for the doggy Dr to fix and she has gone to doggy heaven and that she won’t be coming home. It’s so hard to speak to little ones about it but apparently it’s better for them to know the truth and to know that you as the parent are sad about it so it’s okay for the child to feel sad too xx

And we also had another pet die we had a cat she had diabetes and she refused to eat or drink so we had to put her down that was when I was in like 11th grade or so. We were all sad and said our goodbyes too her before my dad took her to vet to be put to sleep I’m now 21 and I will still remember them but I still miss them

Just say it. Be honest and open. Dogs die. They aren’t meant to live as long as we are. It’s part of pet ownership. Just say it.

That’s a hard one for us when we had to say goodbye to our baby. They were heartbroken. And still have tears when they see pictures of think of him. We chose to be honest about his health and expressed how he wouldn’t be in pain anymore. We had him cremated and brought him home with his tags on his urn so they can say hello when they like to. He was our family

Id be honest. Its never too early to teach and show them how to get through one of lifes hard challenges.

A huge help for my kids when our oldest cat passed away was the book Mister Rogers wrote on the lose of a pet. It helped them to understand a little better and it helps them feel comfortable asking questions.

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Did you already put the pet to sleep or no? If not when we knew we had to with our dog, we prepared our daughter who was 3 at the time by telling her that Abby was sick… that soon she would have to go to a place where she could no longer hold her, or see her. That she could pet her and love her while she was here. When she goes to the place “where sick dogs go” she won’t be able to see her but she will be able to remember her, talk about her, and look at pictures of her. When the time came she hugged her and kissed her goodbye and didn’t ask if she was coming back home etc she really seemed to understand it. She’s 5 now and talks about her going to doggy heaven and missing her :disappointed: good luck

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Our dog died in September and we simply told him (he was 3 nearly 4 at the time)the truth and he’s taken it on and seems to understand that Flynn was very poorly and a lady came to our house and helped him stop being in pain and he died.

I told my kids that our pets that have passed are stars in the sky, now when the stars are out they smile and mention whichever pet it is they are missing x

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My daughter was 3 when my sisters dog passed unexpectedly. We just explained that Blimply (Bentley) went to heaven to be with Papaw Angel (my dad who was killed 14 years ago but she sees pictures of him and we talk about him all the time). At 3 that was enough reassurance for her when she would ask where he was.

I tell them the truth…the same way u would say when a family member dies. But when telling a young child, just make sure u never say that they are sleeping…thats so confusing and traumatizing…i told my son who was 3 that he had boo boos in his body that could not be fixed and his body stopped working

Explain the puppy wasn’t healthy and had to go live in heaven. If you have loved ones that have passed say they went to live in heaven with them and suggest picking a new pet when ready. We lost our beloved German Shepherd a few years ago, had to make the sudden decision to put him down due to complications due to hip dysplasia. kids didn’t get to say goodbye but we had him cremated and had a lil ceremony so they could. Just be honest, It’s hard but they will get thru it.

My 3 year old’s best friend was my grandmother. She tragically passed away on his 3rd birthday. I was honest with him and told him she passed away and is now in Heaven with Jesus and Grandpa. He still talks about going to see her and how he misses her. But I just remind him she is his own guardian Angel.

I told the kids it died . That meant it couldn’t move or do anything anymore, but it wasn’t sick and the hurt went away. My neighbor told her kids the kitty was very sick and went to sleep. Then they buried it. Her daughter was terrified to take a nap or go to bed.

Tell them that he died and if they wanna talk to him hes in the sky and they can say hi whenever they want because the puppy is watching over them my 3 year old says hi to his kitty all the time he passed away months ago

What I did for my 3 year old when our senior dog died was say “Minnie had to leave, but it’s OK. We miss her but she’s happy so we don’t need to be sad” anytime she asked I’d just say that and eventually she’d say “Minnie left but I’m happy” and she eventually stopped asking. If they are older obviously you might have to go deeper but no need to get too into it if you don’t need to in my opinion.

tell the truth… our family dog Bee Bee died in 2009 our daughter was 3. we buried her in the yard and put a cross on her grave with her name… she was my dog for 9 years… She was positioned as a puppy…

This is an outstanding book helping explain the loss of a pet. Plus the author donates all proceeds to animal rescue organizations.

God Needed a Puppy https://www.amazon.com/dp/1640601481/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_3n3dEbEY4JYYF

Hes waiting on the rainbow bridge in heaven for him when he gets there someday. He much happier and in no pain. That’s where all the pets go to stay up there with family members waiting for us.

My mom was very blunt about death when I was growing up. She would say,” your dog died” and that would be that.

Tell them the truth. We lost our Dalmatian after 12 years. She was so terribly sick we had to have her put down. My girls were there with her when she closed her eyes for the last time. They are 21 and 20 now and they have an appreciation for the short life of our pets. My baby girl just had her first loss when our sweet boy Lou, 16 year old cat, past just 2 days after Christmas. While it is hard for them, I think it is harder for us adults.

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Death is part of life, a teachable moment

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Tell him the truth. He might not understand it fully but put it in words that he’ll understand.

Our dog died last year, my youngest was 5 at the time and really had a hard time with it. Each of my kids chose to keep one of our pups toys and I got the book called “Dog Heaven” and that really seemed to help. My youngest still brings our pup up regularly even though we have 2 more dogs now and says that she misses him and I just remind her that he is in doggie heaven chasing all the squirrels. This makes her smile. She still likes looking at the book every few months. I think it helps to talk about the dog. My kids still mention our dog milo, and say things like “he would have liked…” and I agree and we talk about him for a few minutes then we continue on our day. I think it’s nice remembering and talking about him for all of us.

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The truth… They process a lot better than an adult would think… My 6yr old talks about my dog that died before I was even pregnant with him like he knew her.

Be honest. Even at a young age, you can teach grief and the proper ways to process and cope with it. Children are much more resilient than we think.

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When we had to put our pup down last year my 4 year old kept asking where tuck was at so my husband and I told her that he was really sick and went to doggy heaven and is watching her every day, we had him creamated, so his ashes are above the tv in the living room she holds him every now and then but knows hes not in pain anymore and is running around happy, and duck hunting in the sky

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My mom was super honest with me and I appreciate it. Death is inevitable. Unfortunately it happens everyday and one day they’ll have to experience it again so I would be honest and help them grieve.