This might be a conversation you wanna have with him instead of a surprise. 
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No one gets married this quickly that is stable.
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9 months? You probably need to wait a few years before you make such a big decision 
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What?? 
yo girl slow down.
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You have to be married for at least 6 months. With at least 12 months of bio dad not trying to see his child, talk to his child, or help with child support. That doesn’t mean you can prevent those interactions, they have to be done on his own. Then go see a lawyer to get the paperwork started. Then go to court and present it to a judge to have it approved. But bio dad will be served papers regarding the court date and if he shows up with evidence that he’s still trying then I doubt a judge would be willing to take bio dad off the birth certificate. If he doesn’t show up then you can proceed with the adoption.
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9months thats a little time please don’t be that, not being rude but dumb you don’t know this man 9 months its nothing . He could be a pedo and you wanna give him full rights to your kid that fast. Please consider people’s opinions here . Because after you get to know someone for a year or 2 that’s when there true colors come out .
You sound so desperate.
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That’s way too soon to even consider, not to mention that child’s father can decide to exercise their rights. Tread lightly.
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I was with my ex for years and this never crossed my mind. I’d say wait.
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My husband and I got married shortly after our 1 year anniversary. I would talk to your boyfriend, make sure that’s something he wants so early on, not saying that if he chooses to wait he won’t treat your kid like his. But adoption papers as a surprise I think is a bad idea. Unless you two have been talking about it for a while, id just talk to him.
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You have to Petition the court and also put something in the newspaper so if anybody wants contest they can
Have you asked him what he thinks about adopting your son.
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My man and I have been together for 2 years but known eachother for 5. He was there for me through my pregnancy even when I moved from NY to FL he was there emotionally. We just recently started having this conversation and again it’s been a conversation. I wouldn’t reccomend just surprising him. And I would maybe wait to see how things go once yall are married. This is a big decision to make. I would wait.
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Ooh 
girl wait on that… or at least bring it up in a casual future conversation… he might be for it … but don’t freak him out … get some feedback on his thoughts
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I wouldn’t even concider that as an option right now… definitely not as a surprise.
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In pa he can’t until your married. You also have to go through the court for abandonment. Its a process.
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I was with my ex almost 4 years engaged and he was helping raise my son he was the only "dad’’ my son knew, he got a job a few months ago and started cheating quickly and started on crack so we’ve been at my mom’s because of this he was going to adopt my son as well and im thankful that didn’t happen. Wait a few years to make sure you two are going to work out… Trust me
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Bio father will have to sign his rights away
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Who the hell does that??
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You have to have a lawyer and the dad has to sign a paper giving up his rights in West Virginia but if he has never paid child airport should not be a problem
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S.L.O.W. D.O.W.N.
getting married is a life changing event.give yourself and son the chance to be family with this man. Adoption is forever, not a surprise. Take it one step at a time. Let him bring it up. If he wants to be daddy,not just" father figure" ,he will start that conversation!
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How do you know the fiancé wants to adopt your child ? Your moving too quick besides you need to real dad’s signature for that.
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Have you even spoken with him and your son about this? Is the child’s father still involved? How old is the child and have you considered how he will feel having his identity changed? Have you talked to this child’s father to see how he feels about the situation?
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You have to be married first. Also, the original father has to sign over rights to the boy. You need an Attorney for these things. Make sure that you want this other guy to be his Father because this is for the rest of your sons life . In my opinion, I would wait for a while to make sure he is the right one for your son. See how things go after your married for a bit. Don’t move too fast for your sons sake.
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Ask him first. That comes with legal responsibility. Especially in case of divorce.
Also, ask your son if he wants that.
Finally, if there is anything naming the father, legally, you need his permission & he has to terminate his rights.
See a lawyer bc every state is different.
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You don’t.
You wait until he proves himself.
Jeezy, it ain’t even been a year.
Yall are still in the glitter stage.
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Bio dad has to sign his rights away but also so do you. My partner was going to adopt my son after we had 4 kids of our own until I found out that I’d lose all parental rights and would have to adopt him too even though I gave birth to him, so as much as it’s a good idea it’s not worth loosing your parental rights over because if he was to up and leave with the child say a year down the line you wouldn’t have a leg to stand on to actually get him back due to giving up your rights (this is the UK though)
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9 months?!?! Personally that isn’t enough time for me to want to marry someone…yes everyone is different but 9 months isn’t hard for someone to disguise who they really are. It’s basically still in the honeymoon phase of your relationship. Just because someone takes initiative to care for your child as their own does not mean they want responsibility for that said child if you were to divorce…which essentially he would be. If you guys have not talked about it and you want to “surprise” him with it…I feel for this guy and he should run.
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the biggest issue I see here is that YOU want him to adopt your son. But didn’t say that that was what HE wanted.
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Yikes on several fkn bikes
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Talk to an adoption layer
go to childrens court people
This isn’t the place for info on that.
Check with a LAWYER.
Too early for this. Give him times. You don’t know the true person until you married them.
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More time this is not enough time I hope you are not serious
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Surprise him? Don’t you think that would be his decision? It’s crazy to assume he is even ready for that.
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9 months? That’s way too soon what if the marriage doesn’t last then what? How old is your son this should be his decision when he is capable of making it, don’t make it for him cus he might resent u for it later.
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You wait for him to suggest it……otherwise he might feel backed into a corner and obligated to do it. He’s already planning to marry you but adopting a child isn’t something that should be rushed.
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I’d say have a conversation with ur fiance first n just casually say “would u wanna adopt (sons name)” and see his reaction maybe he wants to wait and also ask ur child if he wants that… I am married and have children from a previous relationship and he wanted to adopt but my kids did not want that yet so I am respecting my kids too… make sure ur son is ok with it and make sure it’s something ur fiance really wants to because in the future if it ends badly (I pray it doesnt) but if it does your can’t just unadopt a child like u can divorce a man …
9 months… AND you want to surprise him with adoption papers? Girrrrrl. You a whole red flag.
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Ummmm you should def ask if that’s something he wants to do.
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Girl if you don’t stop with this wild shit right fckn now 
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Yiiikessss, slow down. 9 months is not long enough to even get married in my opinion, but sure as heck not to officially adopt your child. 
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I don’t normally agree with everyone but I’m going to have to on this 9 months that’s not even a year moving really super fast. One thing you don’t want to rush is anything that involves your children so slow down and see how your marriage works out first, and then after a couple of years like at least two if he has a good relationship with your child it can be considered. You have to understand something not trying to talk bad about your man but a man in the beginning will do anything to get a woman’s approval so you don’t know if in 2 years he’s going to still have that positive attitude towards your child. You going to want to go a little bit slower and figure that out.
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9 months isn’t really long enough for you to even know a person. This should be a decision he makes… NOT YOU! It should be seriously discussed. The child’s father will have to also agree to the adoption. My bio father always refused!
Q: how do I go about this?
A: don’t
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You have to be married before he can adopt is what I was told
Is your sons father in his life? I think that’s where this needs to start…
Has your fiancé discussed adopting him with you previously?
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Girl, you don’t be getting adoption papers in the honeymoon period, nononono stop stop
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Are you they desperate to have your kid have a father figure in his life to make a man of 9 months adopt him…
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Your child barely knows this man, 9mths is not long enough. Wait a few years, see how things go AFTER marriage. If things dont work out between you two, do you really want that man to have rights to your child? Think before you take action.
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Maybe let some years pass. That’s a HUGE decision tbh
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Here, OP. On top of my previous “pls do not do this terribly unwise thing” comment yesterday, I’d really like you to read through this link. I’m pasting a bit of it in the comment, but seriously pls open it and read the WHOLE thing. Pay extra close attention to #2.
“#6 Research the adoption fees. There will be a filing fee to apply to the court to adopt your stepchild. Those fees may be nominal (as low as $20 in California), to over $300 in Texas. Payment will be required at the time you file the petition. Other costs could include an adoption home study, attorney’s fees for the child’s attorney, criminal history checks, court-mandated counseling, and fees for a new birth certificate. Although it varies per state, in total, it typically costs $1500-$2500 to adopt a stepchild, even if you have the other parent’s consent, and even if you don’t use a lawyer (because one will often be appointed for the child).”
https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.wikihow.mom/Adopt-Your-Stepchild%3Famp=1
Actually, I’m just gonna post a SS of #2. Because you really need to be thinking this shit through, and I feel like you aren’t.
You should not be giving someone you’ve only known 9 months this much legal control over your child.
9 months? Lady, YOU are a red flag. And shouldn’t you get to know someone before you jump all in? Sure, be engaged, but you don’t have to immediately get married. 9 months of dating is nothing.
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You may want to let him be the one to make that decision.
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Well, first of all - pump the brakes.
Secondly, you can to go file with juvenile courts.
Following that they will attempt to track your child’s real father down and get a reason why he doesn’t want to be a father. If he gives valid reasons they will allow it under the conditions that your boyfriend agrees. But chances are since you’ve only known this guy 9 months, they won’t allow it. Courts want to see parents make choices that are best for the children not what’s best for a new relationship.
Chances are this process will take longer than 3 months.
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Does your fiancé even want to adopt him? For you to say you want to surprise him sounds sneaky.
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Way too soon! People don’t start to show true colors until typically a year. The courts won’t even allow that. Most states require a year of marriage which you haven’t even been together a year. And the father would have to sign over rights if alive. That’s not something you just surprise someone with. That is a serious discussion that needs to be had. Just becuz he took him under his wing doesn’t mean he wants to be required to support if anyhing were to happen between you two.
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Talk to a family attorney
What?!? Woah! That’s your son’s decision! Not yours!
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How old is your son? I’m not trying to be judgemental, but 9 months is hardly enough time to fully know a man. In RARE occasions, people meet fall in love, get married and live happily ever after in a matter of months…in most occasions, that does not happen. Has the fiance ever even mentioned wanting to adopt your son? It may totally freak him out is he hasn’t. If he is marrying you, he will be a father figure either way…wait a few years and see how the marriage works. See if he brings up the topic of adoption. Does he have any children of his own? There is a lot more to adoption than him giving your son his last name.
Bio dad has to sign away his parental rights. New guy has to accept and them the attorney writes up papers and judge signs. New birth certificate with new dad’s name for father and child gets new dad’s last name.
This is how it worked for us.
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Let him make that decision.
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You should pump the brakes and possibly discover more about who this person is before involving your children 
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Don’t do that yet. You can legally change his last me though
He doesn’t need to be legally adopted. He’ll be his stepfather once you guys are married and he’ll still be his stepfather even he adopts him. What’s the point?
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Ask your husband. ?
Has he indicated he wants to?
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Uh… that is way too soon! 9 months? Yeah uh give it time!
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What if this relationship doesn’t work out? I understand no one gets married, with thoughts of divorce, but your intended might think your pushing adoption, so if things go sour, he will have to be paying child support. If I was him, I’d run!
No one is really giving you any help because they are all stuck on the fact that you have only been together 9 months. No one knows your relationship but you two. Just make sure you are positive because you have a child involved. You can’t just surprise him with papers for adoption. The process is a lot more difficult than that. First of all it depends on the state you live in. When I went through this we had to be married and stable. Even though you are Mom they will make him get background checks. You will have to get a home inspection to prove your home is fit for your son. He will have to prove that he can support your son financially. It’s a long time consuming process. Plus is will cost you a good penny to get all that done and to file. To top it off bio Dad has to sign his rights over. Even if he is an unfit parent it doesn’t matter. If he doesn’t want to sign his rights over then that is a whole other expensive process and it probably wont even happen in the end if the bio Dad doesn’t want it to. You will probably just wake up the lion and piss off the bio Dad by saying you want someone else to adopt him. Even if he isn’t around now it will probably bring him around after this. Not sure if thats a good or bad thing for your situation. Either way… you will have a ton of hoops to jump through. Good luck with everything.
I haven’t even moved in with my gf of 2 years 
we both have kids.
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I’m going on 8 yrs with someone other then my kids dad and has been a great father figure but umm…id never just decide to surprise him with legal papers for my kids…that’s something you need to not do and wait until your kids are old enough to talk and communicate this feeling and communicate it with the father figure ( of more the a couple months dude) that’s really not for you to decide…you need to wait and have your childs opinion when they are old enough to understand what is being done…and that it’s a bonus dad…my kids know bonus dad is bonus dad and when they decide to call him dad they can if they decide they don’t they don’t have to if they decide they want there biological dad involved ( and there bio dad is willing…he is more about chasing a high and baby momma # 4 and making kid number 7 with no real responsibility afterwards) they are welcome to I’m not forcing a man I hardly know as my kids legal father without my childs say so or input… girl you should really know better the fact you think it’s good to meet…and marry a guy and give him legal rights to YOUR child in less then a yr time…you need to slow your roll…really slow it down…I just can’t even really believe Iv read this as a serious question…I’m 8 yrs in and still don’t think Iv considered making my man legally responsible or whatever for my kids…
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TRUST ME, I’ve been with mine for over 7yrs, and I’m still learning new things about him…
DON’T DO IT…
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See a lawyer - first step
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This can’t be real 
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Don’t… just don’t! U may think this is what he’d want, but just because he has taken your son ‘under his wing’ doesn’t mean that he has thoughts of adopting him!
You may scare him off or you may not get the answer you thought you’d get and get your panties in a bunch and not recover… 
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It’s nice that he is attentive to your child. But I would give it more time. Let him do it.
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One you’re not married yet. Two you can’t do it he has to do it. And thirdly he has to want to do so. This isn’t something you just do just bc this is something that after lots of time you do bc your partner and your child want to do so not bc you want him to do so.
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Let him bring it up.
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Little to early for that, it may end up hurting your relationship give it time and after you both have grown closer in your marriage and life then talk to him and let him decide…
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Talk to him first, perhaps the day you get married can also be the day he adopts your son.
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Why would you want to surprise someone with adoption papers after 9 months? You seem to be someone who makes rash decisions. Learn to take your time.
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That’s fast… does he want to. Has his bio really had a chance?
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Let it be an organic decision and honestly, let him, and maybe even your son, bring it up first. Otherwise, this is pushy.
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You can start checking on that. First of all, I think I would get married first. Make sure that is something that your man wants to do that legally. If your child has a father that is his father legally, you will need to get permission from him, to give up his parental rights to your child, if and when he does then he will not be consider your child parent anymore. But legally I believe you have to go to court or at least go to your local court house and ask them, you may have to get a lawyer
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9 months is not enough time to know someone
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So I went through something similar. And after 1 year of marriage, it ended badly. Ans he hasn’t seen my daughter since. Now my current husband has been raising her for 6 years. And hw and I both decided we didn’t need a piece of paper to validate that he is her daddy.
Not everyone is the same. But please wait!
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I disagree with these guys.
Ask him privately if he would consider adopting your son
When he says yes, surprise him with the paperwork later
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It needs to be your Man’s choice. Don’t push it just let time make them become close.
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It’s up to him. Leave it alone. 9mths is no time at all!
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don’t do it ! if wants a child to raise as his own - have one with him that would be your best deal - but if u are really stuck on and honestly have thought it through, go talk to a lawyer about this first- to also learn your rights- for the marriage and your son - but what i would honestly honestly think whom do u really love more- your son or your future husband ?
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Yikes, slow it down.
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You need to speak to him before you try getting adoption papers. It would be really messed up if you just sprung it on him
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I’d say check into it.
Here you have to go 2 (maybe 3) years without the biological parent in the child’s life in order to have them be legally adopted by your spouse.
That’s means ZERO contact.
No calls, no 2 minute visits or letters….nothing.
Give it some time and allow them to build an amazing bond, a closer relationship. After the time has past then your child can choose to call this man dad if he wants to, and your child can ask for your fiancé to BE his dad. It does happen.
My husband has built an amazing bond with my son after almost 4 years of us being married. My husband is hands down the best! He stepped up and stepped in!
My son calls his biological father by his first name. When I asked my son if he wanted to get my husband anything for his birthday that would be from him……he said he is going to call him dad on his birthday.
In my experiences, On their own they grow these feelings and become attached. That takes time. Honestly 9 months is extremely too soon.
Pull on the brakes and get to no this man 9mths isn’t along time
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Girl you barely even know this man and your trying to push him to adopt your kid? 