Unbelievable the amount of people on here who can’t comprehend what they read.
Let me help out ALL you slow learners in life,her husband’s daughter by his ex is 21 living with them.
Not the ex.
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Lmao y’all already enabling the lazy ass little girl. Tell her to grow up and get tf out and her lazy bf can keep on dreaming of free room and board. They are just using you but you’re probably too dense to even see that.
Tell they BF to get lost then either get her help or let her follow her BF
If you let the boyfriend in then shame on you. That would be enabling her. Plus then they’ll never leave. Shes not even your kid. Why are you supporting this?
The way she wrote this makes it sound like the ex did moved in but no it’s literally HER HUSBANDS DAUGHTER. HIS DAUGHTER.
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OMGee hahahahahahahhaha
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Let her learn on her own
A parents job is to provide for them up until they are adults. During those years, the most important thing parents should do is guide and encourage them to become functioning adults…adults who can then live independently. If that didn’t happen already, it’s not likely that having her move in at 21 will change things. The only thing worse than allowing her to continue vegetating at your house would be to invite her boyfriend over to vegetate with her. It’s time for a serious talk with your husband…followed by a more serious talk with his daughter about when she will be moving out.
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It’s called tough love. Sometimes that shit saves their life. 
My mom would have kicked me out if I acted like this.
Smh at 21 you should have a job or in college or even both
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She’s 21… free to do as she wants… unless she’s disabled & you’re hands on for her care, she can find her own way…
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Don’t worry about being mean, it is mean of your step daughter to look at people for what she can get from them and not try to grow as a person. Tough love is def needed here. After a month of living with you; you would have to evict her and him to get them to leave if they won’t go when asked- just saying, sounds like you have a couple of losers on your hands who would probably lay up in your house until someone MAKES them leave. Say no to the boyfriend moving in, AT LEAST!!! Good luck.
Why the hell is t her sugar daddy paying her way. Isn’t that the whole point of that weirdness?
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When me and my bf were living with his grandma(who practically raised him) we had to pay rent and buy all our own food. Mind you we had both been working though before we turned 18
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Nope give them that deadline 3 months should be plenty of time if it’s 2 of them to save up money to move
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Child….21 is not a child. You are an enabler and as long as you treat her like a child you shouldn’t complain. I’d show both of them the curb…you’re not helping them, the only thing you’re helping them do is self destruct 
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Don’t let him move in. Give her a deadline. She’s 21and should be handling her own business. And she’s lucky she has you guys to assist. Sounds like she needs a good wake up call.
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Tell her she has to be out by xxx date and at that date kick her out. Do not let the boyfriend move in. They need to be GROWN AND GONE.
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Do not move him in! That’s first. Second, give her a deadline to get out. She’s way too old to be living off people. Efff that.
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Nope both out both adults both lazy the streets may be tough but parents got to stop coddling them that’s the problem.
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Start with changing the wifi password and flipping the breaker to her room. I’m assuming your husband pays for her phone bill? Call the company and temporarily disable it. She’s 21, if she refuses to pay bills, then they get shut off, That simple. Don’t discuss it with her beforehand or warn her like you would a child, just turn everything off. And when she wanders out of her room because it’s dark to ask you why her stuff isn’t working, ask her if she paid her bills. And inform her rent is due in a few weeks. Start eviction papers so she knows you’re serious. Don’t let the boyfriend move in because chances are that will add a baby into the mix that you will also have to take care of. Boyfriends don’t get to move in to my parents house. If you want to live with your boyfriend, you move out. That’s the entire motivation to get her to leave home…
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I would absolutely not allow the boyfriend to move in. That just creates more of a sticky situation. I would allow her to live there if she agrees to take this time to find a stable job or attend college. She also should be expected to help out around the house and be awake/out of her room at a certain time each morning. Allowing her to be lazy, sleep all day, not contribute, etc. is just enabling her to continue her behavior.
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She got it all wrong if she got a sugar daddy and broke, kick her and her scrub out.
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She’s 21. It’s time for her to grow up and quit expecting for mommy and daddy to save her. My parent’s kicked me out for being 16 and pregnant, havent lived with mommy and daddy nor expected them to help in 11yrs.
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Weed isn’t a big deal and it’s legal. And if he was a real sugar daddy why do they need to live with you?
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Nope not at all. You can’t keep providing. Another option to the deadline is making them help pay bills and for food. Parents tend to coddle their kids to much. Time to let the bird fly from the nest
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You are definitely an enabler. They are grown ups and the responsibility should start with them. Laziness and taking advantage should not be tolerated
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Questions like these make me laugh. Said person is 21, CLEARLY, has been spoon fed and not raised to be independent.
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Boyfriend wouldn’t be living in my home, he can get a job or live on the streets. Daughter would have a timeline to get her $hit together or she would be out also. It would be one thing if they working, schooling, saving for a future but they aren’t. They are using you and as long as you continue to allow it, they will continue to do it.
Listen I will help my kids all day and they are grown but they have to have a job once your 18 your doing something to make money if your not in college full time mine knew this before they turned 18 next 21 is not a child does she have kids? She needs to work or get out and no not working boyfriend living with me no no no I gotta go to work 5 days a week 10 hours a day nobody sitting in my house watching movies ,playing video games , eating up all the food and having sex and I’m at work absolutely not.
Give them a date and stick by it. The choice is theirs
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Mines 18 and I’m tough loving her right now. 21 is way too old to be feeding off the parents. That’s just my opinion!
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So she has a sugar daddy and is broke ?
Damn she’s got that alllll wrong 
Bye bye birdie 
wanna see motivation? Cant play video games or be on ya phone when ya homeless
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She apparently is a doedoe if she did a sugar site and she’s still broke. No boyfriend over, 90 days to get out. 
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Pray about it ask for help. GOD as the answers. Just be patient. Tuff love is the best love.
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Tough love is the best love she has to grow up and get out on her own give her a date to move out by and don’t let the boyfriend move in
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Put your foot down, either she pays or she gets out. That sugar daddy isn’t a sugar daddy if he wants to live with you as well.
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You INVITED this into your home ??? What did you expect?? Nope !! Time for them to go. Absolutely NOT does she get to invite anybody else to live in YOUR house !!!
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They’d have been out before you wrote this!!!
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So the whole boyfriend moving in I think depends on a few things, his family relationship, his reasoning. If he’s moving in he should be paying rent. The step-daughter should be either going to school or working, and helping around the house. Disconnected her phone, don’t by foods that she specifically asks for ( she can go out and get specific things she wants on her own)
Tell them they need to find a job and ask them to pay a portion for the cost of them living there. Maybe not full rent since rent can be crazy expensive in certain areas but I’d definitely say if you aren’t going to get your act together you will need to find some place else to stay
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Okay one… she is NOT “grown” she’s 21…. And she told you exactly who she was before you decided to take it upon yourself to invite her to live with y’all. This honestly isn’t your problem it’s your husbands. he wants to throw his kid out let him. Idk why you say she’s grown but then you “enable” her by not making her make grown decisions and figure it out.
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Where do we order our pot smoking sugar daddy, asking for a friend 
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They need hard love and a dose of reality for their own good as you won’t be around forever.yes it may seem harsh to do that to your kid but it’s better for them in the long run.stand firm and don’t back down.
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I would not let the boy move in, if you do you will probably have to do a eviction to get them out.
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They are adults and can choose to do what they want. HOWEVER, so are y’all. Give them a deadline, right out a contract to live that, yes give your kid a lease and eviction if they don’t follow it. Teach them how the world is really going to respond to that behavior
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It sounded like a train wreck waiting to happen. But I would give her a deadline and think nothing of it. She will have to learn the hard way.
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First off no boyfriend moves in. Second she is 21 yrs old she needs to get a job pay some amount of rent for room and board, or move in with the boyfriend and his parents, or a on the streets or couch surf. No other choices. She is not a child she is a woman and needs to take responsibility for herself. I was on my own since I was 14. Trust me I got jobs and proved to a judge I was able to take care of myself cause my mother chose her child molesting boyfriend over me. And was emancipated at age 15. I had needs had to feed myself needed tampons, clean clothes etc… left with no chose she may wake up and see the light. And when that first check comes in she will hopefully see her potential. Give her a month to find a job, and if she gets a job let her know how proud you are of her. Help her if she needs rides but let her no you are not a free taxi. Give her a reasonable price for the ride every week. 200.00 a month for rent and teach her to buy and prepare her own foods. If that goes well give her another 3 months to find an apartment help if she needs it not all but some. There are places out there that also can help. Trust me I know. I’ve gotten help from churches, places like the salvation army, second hand stores like we have here in Vermont and New Hampshire. I think putting her on the spot and hold your ground she will see the light or she leaves. But do not give in. Cause she will never learn.
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You should never have allowed the BF in your house. Bye bye.
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They are adults. Give them a time limit and be done. If you don’t make boundaries they are going to walk all over you.
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Yes give her a deadline if nothing changes then kick her she’s an adult so she should go and live on her own even if she’s homeless she needs to see how she going to b living sleep all day that’s b.s.
the worse mistake you could make is to let her boyfriend move in.
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It’s your home
She.is 21
Take everything away
So she is out on the street she will get a wake up.call
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She’s 21 not 12 let her tail go!
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Yep rent of ____ paid on and every ____ or you move out. Let her sugar Daddy pay. Time to adult.
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How long has the mom and child lived with guys??
You can use this to establish residency of the child at your house/address.
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They both need to go I would not put him in that house and she needs to go… End of it. Do not be an enabler put him on the street
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Never should have taken her in to being with shes an adult
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You are an enabler. Don’t take the boyfriend in or you’ll have bigger problems. She needs to be out on her own. Come on mom, grow a pair and love your child!
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Kick her out, give her 60 days. Done.
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Put you foot down they do what they can get away with. All you can do is encourage them to be better you can’t make them do it. So set rules and boundaries and don’t make exceptions if they don’t like it they can leave and if there homeless its there choice to live that way only they can make the decision to make so thing better for themselves.
Don’t let him move in. If she’s unhappy with your rules she Is an adult let her go.
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Your not helping her by carrying her weight. What would she do if God forbid something happened to y’all. She would be clueless and left to a cruel world. It’s not mean to give the deadline. She needs to grow up and as parents we have to teach our children how to be functioning adults in this world. Whether they like it or not. If she chooses to not grow up she has to live with the consequences of her own actions. That’s the way of life. All you can do is give a good honest try and the rest is up to her
Nope don’t let the boyfriend move in and tell her to go find a job because she’s never going to find one if you guys don’t make her get one she straight-up wants somebody else to take care of her I want to let him move in it will be too hard to get them out
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Does she , being an adult, pay rent and contribute to cleaning and cooking ? Here’s the rules- if you want help then here’s the rules. My house, my rules. If she can’t agree with this and do it - get out . Sometimes giving them a rude awakening is the push they need.
He’s not a sugar daddy if he’s homeless. Tell her to message me. I’ll tell her where to find the good ones. 
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Let her move in charge her rent. Put it away in an account dont let her know. Then when she has enough for a deposit and 2months rent tell her its time to go.
There is only one why it’s called
TOUGH LOVE.
THEY WELL GET A JOB OR LIVE OFF OF SOMEONE DO,T LET IT BE YOU.
Why in the fucking hell would you all invite her to live with you? ffs smh They’re grown ass people. They need to figure it out for themselves. Give them an eviction notice aka deadline to be out. If you have to give an excuse, say the landlord found out and wants them out. If they end up homeless, thats on them for not growing up and saving money.