How do I end my relationship?

My fiance has had a drug problem since I’ve known him. It’s a hard drug not weed or anything like that, we have broken up a few times over it, hes gotten help and I told him if he does it again I’m done, now he lied to me saying he took some adderall which he isnt prescribed and I knew he was lying by the way he was acting. He knows how I feel about him watching pn it makes me feel 2and place like I’m not good enough and I came home to him all messed up and a ton of pn on his phone and when I asked him about it he looked me straight in my eyes and lied and then starting bringing up old shit in our relationship and we argued. I dont want to go through this again how do I tell him I’m done ?

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Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. How do I end my relationship?

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End it for good that’s how

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Tell him you deserve better and obviously he cant do what he needs to to make u happy. U deserve better❤

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I’m Done. You just did!

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You leave. You tell him your done and go!

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You are worth so much more than that. Tell yourself that as many times as you have to!

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Just leave, say we are done.

“ We’re DONE ! “ then if you feel like elaborating you can tell him all the reasons why & either leave or kick him out. Stick to your guns & don’t take him back.

Look, its been really interesting being your gf but its time for us both to move onto better things

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Get out will not change

Just tell him you cannot take anymore of his bs. If he don’t want to get a life. Too bad. YOU DO

Yah no. just tell him straight up I’m leaving you because your not changing

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Easier said and done but when I was in your situation I left. We both were using at the time I was ready to stop but he wasn’t so I packed my kids & my stuff and left.

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Exactly what you just said?

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Pack and leave when he is not home. Then just leave!!! No discussion. You would only be giving him the opportunity to talk you into staying. You know you are worth better.

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Sometimes no explanation is needed. It sounds like he made the decision for you when he used & lied. He knew the consequence.

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I wouldn’t explain anything. If he knew this was a problem and he chose to still do it after you expressed your feelings… you owe him not a single word. You collect your things, leave, and never look back. He already knows what he did. Now it’s time for him to understand that you know your worth and you won’t stick around to be treated less than.

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Have him read this post and throw him out.

Walk away before he brings you down to his level.

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Simple just tell him and be ready to walk out the door.
You deserve better and he keeps doing it because you keep staying. Show him you are serious.

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Do like I did… get a rental, pack what you can, and drive… I left a 3 year engagement in Feb due to hard drugs… you can’t help him.

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Like this… “I’m done.”

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As a recovered addict, just pack and go. He won’t get help until he’s ready and you can’t make him be ready.

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Say I’m done. Get your stuff and walk out. Its probably not that easy but you’re done it before. You don’t deserve this. Especially if hes not will to try himself.

Just leave! It isn’t worth explaining it to him. If he hasn’t realized by now that his drug problem is the problem in your relationship he never will.

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Just go. Only way to end it is literally just pack up and go. You keep saying you will, and you don’t, so of course he doesn’t change behavior or take it seriously.

You already know what to do.
What did you tell him the last time??
Do what you said.
He’s not for you.

I begged, pleaded and fought for 10 years for an addict to change. They aren’t going to unless they want to for themselves.

Just leave. No need to give him closure.

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He has to want to stop until he does he will continue with that said walk away with no explanation if he can’t figure it then shame on him!!!

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You don’t owe him am explanation. Tell him to pack his shit and go.

Sweetie you can do better

You don’t tell him anything, just move out and move on.

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Drugs and lying I get. And I’m not trying bash I legit just don’t understand the porn thing. Like…he’s not going out having sex with other girls, unless he’s like live camping with another person that legit dossnt make sense to me.

Be like me and just leave hon. Just go. You told him over and over and he doesn’t love you enough to change or care…just go. If you.need to vent or cry or cuss and yell you can PM me. I left on August 27th. It was hard and I cried a bit but I’m getting a little bit stronger each day

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You: “I’m done”. (Pack and leave)

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You’ve already set the boundaries, so he’ll know why youre leaving. Plan your exit, and go. If you don’t you’ll be giving him permission to continue with drugs and the consequences could be dire. Not just for him, but you as well. Emotionally, financially, morally. Do you see yourself as an enabler? If not, you have your answer. It’s not an easy choice, but a necessary one.

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Simple.

Im done.

Then leave and dont look back. You deserve a hell of a lot better

Just tell him he’s crossed every boundary and hurt you enough. It is over.

Pack your stuff and leave! He will get it!

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Why would you say anything, he’s been warned multiple times just go

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Way to go Aryanna Hinton

For ur safety just pack up n leave

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Leave. This was me. We had a baby and I tried everything. It never works unless they want to change and he doesn’t so run. Please save yourself and don’t stay.

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U need to leave. As a recovering addict myself he needs to find his rock bottom in order to change and become sober. Sometimes that’s the only way they learn. In case you don’t know which I’m pretty sure you do, adderall is a poor mans coke. If not prescribed it, it gives the same high as coke. Just make sure u are ready to leave don’t let him make u feel bad. Just say babe I love u but I can’t do this anymore. How can u love me if u don’t love urself if u did h wouldn’t be using. I need to do what’s best for me. I’m sorry but this the end of us. I wish u best of luck girl

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Let him read this post…or just leave…

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Just be done. Cut the tie because until that person hits rock bottom, there will not be an issue seen for them to change the behavior. You can’t want them to be sober more than they want it for themselves.

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Walk away and don’t look back.

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Tell him you are done, it’s over you warned him.

Grab your stuff and don’t look back. I was with an addict once… He manipulated me A LOT. You will heal and move on. Sending love and light.

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Leave. Cut him off. No contact. Move on :heart:

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He’s def doing meth. RUN NOW!!

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If he truly wants to get better he will with or without you. As an addict with 9 years recovery next month, just tell him the truth, and leave. Be prepared for every guilt trip you can imagine. Don’t fall for any of it. If he’s serious like I said he’ll get better with or without you. You need to honor yourself by not taking more than you can handle. Being with an active addict sucks.

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Is he on meth? That sounds like meth. Please leave him. This doesn’t get better. An addict will never change unless they want to. I’ve been dealing with this with my dad for 24 years. You deserve so much more.

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Just pack and leave change your number block him on fb and messenger and just be done

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Just end it. This is not a good situation and you need to cut him off and move on. It’s sad, but if this has been ongoing, it’s apparently getting worse and not better and you would be better off cutting ties now than after you’re married. Kick him out, move out, whatever you need to do.

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Just say it, you already told him it would happen and he still did it

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He’s not gonna change for you or for anyone but himself he’ll continue to lie to you because he has an addiction he may need treatment or NA meetings and that will only work if he wants it to I’m speaking from experience my husband is now 30 days clean and sober and it’s been extremely hard on all of us.

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Just leave, if it’s your place nicely gather his things and explain that you have tried to be understanding you have tried to love him through his addiction but it isn’t fair for you to have to suffer any longer because of his addiction and choices. You don’t have to stick around because you love them, and if they truly want to change encourage them to do so while being firm about not being partners any longer.

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Leave asap. He will pull you in with him before you could pull him out. I know from experience. If you stay you will end up right where he’s at. Please save yourself. He’s not going to change till he hits his bottom. But you can not change or save him. My heart goes out to you girl. :black_heart::black_heart::black_heart:

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you could grab your stuff and ghost him…not the most grown up way to do it but there is not negotiating with an active drug user.

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Just leave. Especially if there is no kids involved. Addict behavior is addict behavior. Please for your sake run.

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I’m so sorry. My nine year marriage to my childhood best friend and high school sweetheart ended because of drugs (stimulants also, it sounds like your bf is on stimulants), so I know better than anyone how they can absolutely demolish a relationship. I have to agree with Heather Scrano , just pack your stuff and go. No confrontation, no big scene, just leave. There’s nothing you can do. He has to do it on his own, and he won’t unless he really wants to. It doesn’t even have anything to do with you. I mean it’s bigger than you. Addiction is bigger than any man.

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Don’t even say anything. Pack your stuff and go. Block him on social media and his number.

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Know where you’re going wait till he leaves take your stuff leave a note that you’re done and go

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Leave, run fast , your too good for addiction !

You just tell him “I’m done” leave and never look back block him on everything so he can’t contact you. You can’t change an addict and you can’t help them if they don’t want help themselves your just hurting you in the end.

Life is too short to have to deal with that shit…
Bye :raising_hand_woman: We’re done !

Show him!

And until then, you might as well be as blue as a smurf in the face cause baybaaaayyyyy​:weary::100::bangbang:

When you’re done talking that’s when you’re done.
When you’re done crying,
That’s when you’re done.

And not a min nor sec before.

Wash your hands with him my dear. You’ll thank yourself and wonder what took you so long to be freeeee​:sparkling_heart::heart:
Best wishes.

Just leave. I hope he gets help. If you feel like you owe him and explanation you could leave h a letter. But it sounds like he’s a junkie and they can’t just quit.

Sounds like your main issue is the porn and your own insecurities

You say it and leave. There is no process.

You just have to tell him and actually mean it. He is gonna tell you all kinds of dreams amd promises but they’re all lies. My ex was the same way. I didn’t open my eyes and leave till I had a concussion and 2 fractured ribs cuz I wouldn’t buy him meth. Don’t be stupid like I was. You’re gonna feel to weak to follow thru, but you have to. If you need someone to talk to, my messages are always open.

Let your actions do the talking…

Coming from someone in recovery (8yrs this week!)…. You need to do what’s best for you. If he hasn’t hit rock bottom yet, he’s going to. And that’s the only way or time he will ask for help, if he does at all. You can’t own this - it’s NOT your fault. But you need to take care of YOU, mama. If he gets help, and down the line you still love him and he’s working his own program (whatever it may be) and he’s clean, and fixes his issues, absolutely revisit the situation. But for now, you staying isn’t helping either of you. It’s easier said than done, but when I got clean my ex still used. And finally you just get to a point where you need to tell him point blank you’re done. No consequences for his actions in an addicts mind usually means they feel comfortable to keep doing what they are doing.

I recommend having someone with you when you leave in case he’s high, just to be on the safe side. Pack what you need, and leave. Block him on everything. Don’t give in. Addicts will say anything to get what they/we want. You’ve got this.

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Leave. Every time you say the next time it happens I’m gone, they take you less serious. Addicts that are in the middle of they’re struggle are going to have one thing on their mind. Actions speaks louder then words.

You need to leave and cut all ties .I know how manipulative drug attics can be and how easily they can make you feel sorry for them .

Just tell him you’re done then pack your stuff and leave him and cut him off completely. If there’s kids involved go thru the courts

Just go. Leave. Dont even say anything.

Get out. An addict not working a program is a hell you don’t want to live. Run!!

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If you have to leave when he’s not there and cut off all contact . If you know you don’t want this get out now don’t worry about anyone’s feelings but yours

Sorry you’re going through this. Clearly he doesn’t respect you. I agree to set yourself up somewhere to go and just leave, block him, there’s nothing to say to him. You already have and it got you nowhere :heart:

You gotta walk the walk. You can’t just talk the talk.

I can’t give any advice besides what I know, and I know starting a life with somebody who is in a hard drug addiction isn’t healthy for you. Run so fast before there’s children involved. It really is a simple break off. :heart:

1st of all addiction is a baffling disease because the disease lies and will lie to your face and will lie with such conviction that you want to believe them. Deep down it doesn’t mean he is a bad person but right now he is not healthy! He is not good for himself and definitely not good for you right now. You need to get far away and he needs to get the help. He may fall flat on his face and that may be what he needs to do to get back on to the path of recovery. You can’t “fix it” . You need to get your own mental health healthy! Best of luck to you.

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You just pack your stuff, maybe leave a note and go…

Pack your bags and when he wakes up he may notice you are gone. If he doesn’t notice. His problem.

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He clearly don’t want help. Just leave it’s a never ending cycle that I seem to be stuck in with my kids dad.

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Just leave I was with a herion addict for 2 yrs they don’t change

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Don’t say anything, get your stuff and disappear.

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repeat after me…" I’m done"

As a mother of a son who choose to use again and again…know He hasn’t chosen you the addiction is too much for him…my son lost the battle 12/26/20…he over dosed and lost his life.The herione was laced with Fentyal…he was 36…long history of addiction…the addiction will only get worse and affect his life of lies and stealing to support his habit …see if he can get in house at youth challenge treatment…only help he can get is giving himself to the Lord…mean time move on…he will only bring you down …you won’t ever trust him…Right now in my son’s lost I’m fighting for others to fight the addiction.

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He’s never going to change

Just leave. All you can do. I had to take our 2 toddlers and my 4 older kids and move to another state. We spent the first 2 months in a homeless shelter. We now have a home and 2 vehicles. Slowly building back after everything I lost. Best feeling is not being around that man or his dope.

Don’t. Just pack your crap and leave, if you’re able. He doesn’t deserve you explain to him, AGAIN, what’s wrong and why you’re done. Just be done.

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Just open the door take a few steps shut the door and walk away to never look back

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My heart breaks for you, I k ow this feeling all too well. I secretly had to start packing up and if he didn’t get busted by his po was going to take my girls and run while he was at work. I didn’t feel safe telling him to his face I was leaving

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And why do all you women get so irate over porn? Quit going through your man’s phone and getting bent out of shape over porn…you will be much happier

One question …do you love him ? If you can answer that honestly without hesitation then don’t give up on him and walk away , you have to be patient with an addict you can’t threaten what will happen if he uses again , you have to be the positive support push him to get help with you right by his side Dean O’Gorman or myself are always available to have a conversation if you would like too ! I hope you take this advice as walking away from him could do more harm than good :disappointed: I sincerely wish you the best and a positive outcome :heart:

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