I bet he cheated on the first wife with her. Lol my petty ass would treat you both like shit too honestly. 
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Girl if you donât cuss that wench out.
You have put up with for 9 yrs - just 4 more!!@
Tell your husband to step up and handle this
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More court. Take the child. Sheâs a bummum. Why should a child have all this upheaval? You got this.
Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. How do I tell my husband's ex wife to politely get over herself?
Iâm trying not to be mean myself. I know how you feel. Exâs are crossed out for a reason. My demands have to go to my husband as heâs the one whom should deal with the ex. Tell your husband itâs his place to put her in her place.
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I feel itâs your husbandâs place to set this woman straight. Sheâs disrespecting both of you, but aggressively looking for conflict from you. Donât give her the satisfaction.
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You canât. Taking the higher road is exhausting. Just hope you see the bad Karma when it hits her straight in her ass. Also your step daughter knows youâre a class act and her mom is an idiot. Even if she doesnât say a word about it. Kids see EVERYTHING. Keep being classy. When your step daughter is grown youâll have a clear conscience. Hugs.
InterestingâŚwhy are you two not married? sounds like it would be far simpler as far as court goesâŚbut maybe notâŚYou signed up for thisâŚand he is gone part of the time? An ex is usually jealous of the new woman and does all she can to destroy the relationship between her daughter and the stepâŚbut untill her ex âŚtakes the standâŚnothing will changeâŚI told my daughter when she got marriedâŚIf she has problems with her mother in law then her husband has to handle itâŚand if he has problems with us âŚshe has to handle itâŚbut in your case not being marriedâŚlegally there is not much you have in the way of legal papers that give you rightsâŚHope you can get a good attorney to assist you to sort out the mess and give you some legal advice that you needâŚ
Yeh what a pain she sounds very immature n somewhat spiteful all the paper work n stuff let your husband sort it out , does she listen to him? Keep on being supportive of your stepdaughter.
Heâs lucky he gets visitation with his daughter, I have seen too many of my brothers (active duty as I was at the time) have their children taken by their wives, and have refused any visitation. One of my buddies ex wife stole everything, cleaned out their account, sold his dog, and moved her ass and their infant daughter into her parents house, while he was deployed, and has since had two kids from two different active duty dudes states away and refusing them visitation, all the while getting bank in child supportâŚ
stop being polite. whatever attitude she gives you give right back to her you have evidence that sheâs withholding your time. you probably could file a petition to become the main caregiver most judges donât like when parents withhold children from other parents because theyâre better. I actually know someone that one full custody of his daughter because his ex was so petty and the judge was not having any of the moms shit.
Tell her if she doesnât grow the fuck up youâll take the man sheâs with now just like you did this one. Lol her mouth would hit the floor.
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You donât. You tell your husband to man up and deal with it. She doesnât have to talk to you or deal with you at all if she doesnât want to and thatâs just that.
Get over the ego and become friends or at least friendly. You are Co parenting ⌠Deal with it.
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Sheâs jealous and probably will never get over it sadly
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Time to go back to the lawyer for updates to agreement.
itâs your HUSBANDS job to handle this bitch- not yours- if he seems incapable of doing so, withdraw from ALL negotiations & STOP doing his work for him- Iâm sure things will get straightened out in a hurry without your help ~
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See the first time she spoke to you like a peice of shit should have been the last as you should have kicked the shit out of herâŚas you donât let anyone disrespect you, and if your husband said anything bad about it then kick the shit out of him too
I donât want to see this page and it wonât let me block it
JesusâŚmy head is spinning!!
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Narcissistic people.!!
Tell her,Bye Felicia,!!
Let your husband handle it
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Uggg sorry this.must be irritating to say the least! Atleast your do the right thing! Her petty ass definitely doesnât:(
She is BITTER for whatever reason and feels like she has to be in control. She feels like you play no significant role to the child and sheâll try her best not to let you because it has to be All about her and her decisions.
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To the ppl saying âwhy not just have dad do itâ, itâs because SHE (the wife) is doing it. Thatâs the way itâs handled in their family, bm needs to accept it and understand she doesnât run ANYTHING in their household bc she laid on her back. This is whatâs wrong society now. Everybody wants participation trophies. Um, sprinkles are for winners miss 
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Put her in her place. There is absolutely not reason to do it politely. You are not a door mat and do not deserve to be treated that way. I would tell her she needs to stop being so rude, itâs been 9 years and youâre not going anywhere. If she doesnât like you, thatâs fine but she needs to respect you as a personâŚespecially when youâre helping raise her daughter.
Sounds like sheâs jealous bitter ex cause she had the boy and you got the man
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Sheâs petty!!! Let him deal with her
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She is just baiting you, let the bait rot!
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Donât bother and stop letting her get to you!!! She hates her own life! Donât let her stress you out
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A person said it above. Keep being the bigger person, sheâs baiting you. Let that bait rot. Sheâs burying herself. Daughter gets older, sheâs gonna notice moms behavior compared to yours.
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I have to applaud your patienceâŚcause mine would have ran out long ago! She sounds like an immature jealous little madam! Keep being u n donât lower yourself to her levelâŚthe daughter will be of age to make her own arrangements soon with u and her dad soon enough, without any contact from the mum.
Youâre long winded!! I can see your type from mile away! You should quit trying to seek validation from complete strangers that only hear your end of the story. I PROMISE youâre NOT the little angel you are portraying yourself to be!
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i say get the 11 year old an iphone and skip the immature baby mama altogether. If she doesnât like that, the girl having/using the phone and details can be amended into the parenting plan (custody portion of devotee decree)
If all that your saying is the truth, then hatâs off to you queen. That baby girl will appreciate your maturity in the future.
I personally wouldnât be so mature
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You donât. They either grow up or they dont
Sheâll never change. When possible have your husband do all communication. With him active duty you might still do all the ground work. Send him the info and let him pass it on to her. Take her to court when she breaks the agreements. It sounds like sheâs a real piece of work. Sorry.
Close caption her ass! What u do with your husband is no ones damn business or is it? How do you roll with that? I say the ex is as good as shes gonna get thatâs why sheâs an X but do b good or kind to his children itâs no fault of there own they had loosey parenting!
Telling someone to grow up and be a human wonât work. Setting boundaries, documenting everything, legal issues on lock and probably family therapy when sheâs with youâŚYou can only keep YOUR side of the street clean. Communicate with her as little as possible until sheâs respectful.
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Send everything to her certified mail. You get confirmation when she signs for the letter in a return receipt. If she refuses the mail you have proof to court that she is denying visits.
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You let your lawyer to the talking and ask she gets mandatory counseling because she is immature and all but trying to avoid court regulated visitations which is harming her daughterâs relationship with her father. Poor parenting (on her part). Counseling is a must.
If it were me. I would not switch phonesâŚif she messages him when she should be messaging youâŚhe could respond, per the court you are to message the parent traveling, which as you know is X. Then if she does the thumbs up to receiving a message, I would text one time, please confirm in words or I will assume your intent is to confirm you received the info. Iâm not a lawyer but I donât see a reason that would not be sufficient in court. As far as the threats, document them too, talk to your lawyer and the next time you are in court have them order her to stop. All of this could potentially impact who has custody. Maybe if she realizes her behavior could cost her custody, she will get a reality check.
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just continue being nice, she probably will never change. Donât waste your breath on telling her anything as she will not pay any attention.
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You canât but you can have your husband deal with her. This woman does not want to deal with you at all. She probably feels that you have no right to communicate about the child. Some people are too immature to deal with the step parent.
Well, good news is you only have 7 years left to deal with this immature human. People suck. Itâs not worth any conversation you could attempt to have. I would give up and make your hubby do all communication. I know thatâs âletting her winâ but I donât see any other way. If she wonât be an adult and communicate with you, thereâs nothing you can do about it. Sucks, but like I said, people suck.
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pray for her, she is seriously disturbed! She will never know you are praying but God will & he will work on her heart! It will also help you, even though it is hard to do!
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Let your husband handle everything with the childâs mom. You need to take care of yourself.
That last sentence is pretty much all u need to say ⌠grow up and stop trying to be awkward for no reason
Youâre too involved and she resents it. Sheâs trying to put boundaries in place because she wants to deal with the father, not you. Step back and let the dad be the dad and the mother be the mother.
Donât worry about polite. Just lay it out for her. You donât have to tell, just calmly, firmly tell her to knock it off. Best done in person, looking her straight in the eye.
Let your husband handle everything. Donât communicate with the ex at all. Itâs his kid and his ex.
Good luck with that, I donât see a resolve on her part.
Step back from it all let husband deal with that shit. Worry about YOUR kids for your sanity
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Step back. Allow all texts and messaging and organising to be done by Dad and his ex wife.
If she doesnât want to talk to you she doesnât have to. Makes her a twat nonetheless, but she has the right to twat along if she wants to.
Many courts use something called a Family Wizardâwhere parents can communicate thry the system with one another, and the courts are privvy to it ALL.
Since she is wanting to act like an immature jerk, maybe look into using this to discuss things like the daughterâs travel schedule, etc. That way, if she shows her rearend to you, refuses to acknowledge receipt of the travel plans, or defaults on them, thereâs an admissible court record of it all. Not to mention, if she is withholding visitation without a valid reason, discussing it thru the Wizard Will ALSO provide proof for your contempt filingsâfor which you should be asking for Atty and court feesâsince none of it would even be necessary if she would comply.
As for whether you should be salty over the ex speaking directly to you⌠you should not. It is THEIR child. And while I imagine the ex is trying to force your husband into speaking to her so that he has to deal with her, not you, it is their child together and he rightfully he should be the one. Not to mention, he should only be speaking to her about the child and related issues.
I get that you are not behaving the same wayâyou pointed out your self that you are a grown up, and your husbandâs ex is an immature, petulant childâŚ. That tells you right here that this will never get any better. She is still bitter over the fact that she lost him, and you have him. Just let her stew in itâand be glad that you no longer have to deal with the likes of her.
I would bring it up in court that she is having the daughter call your husband by his first name, and her step dad âDadâ. That is actually âundermining the parent-child relationship â, and could actually be grounds to file for a change of custody. Not saying you WANT thatâwith military moves, etc. I donât know your life. But an admonishment from a judge to the exâwith a court order stating that the child should not call ANYONE ELSE âMomâ or âDadâ other than her biological parentsâgives you another means for contempt if it keeps happening. Multitudes of contempts can often lead to custody changeâand then it will be the EX that will have to make arrangements to see the child and pay for the travel.
Not trying to stir anything. But really, she canât possibly be looking to her childâs best interests if this is how she is behaving. What a toxic environment for that poor kid.