How do you feel about having kids far apart?

I just wanted to see how other moms felt about having kids years apart. I’ve been with my husband 12 years, married 10. We have a 10-year-old boy. I’m 29. We’ve wanted more children, but we started a business around the time our son was born, and things were comfortable but tight. Now ten years later, we can afford another child. My husband down for whatever I want. I’m just so torn. I want another baby, but do I want to start all the way over? If I did have another child, they would be 11 years apart were kinda in mind set if it happens cool, if not that’s ok too. Am I just kind of heartbroken that my little boy is getting more independent by the day? I’m just curious how other moms with kids with an age gap like that works for them. I just have a lot of feelings.


I have a 25 year old a 19 year old a 14 year old and an 11 year old… I guess when you have all the in-between it doesn’t seem to be that far apart but yeah I have my oldest and youngest are 14 years apart I think it’s great do whatever you’re comfortable with… and you will be starting over again so have a baby shower .

Will you Regret Not having any more? That was my question for my last one.

My son and daughter are 7 years apart. Then, I had another baby that would’ve been 12 years younger than my son. Sorry, the baby was born too early and he passed. But, I say, do it! I had my son when I was 18, my daughter when I was 25, the baby when I was 30. I’d do it if I wanted more children.

My oldest is 14 ill be giving birth in 6 weeks it happens 🤷 middle one is 6.5 none of them planned they came when the gods decided they should

My 3 kids were 6 years apart…didnt plan it but happened that way.

My kids are 10 5 and 2. The bigger they are the more helpful they are.

My oldest is 8 years older than my second and 14 years older than my 3 rd they are all very close to each other

I have a 12 year gap between my 2nd and 3rd… I love it :slight_smile:

My daughter is 15 and I have a 13 year old son and 9 month old baby. Having a baby is a lot of work but they are only little for so long then, poof…off to kindergarten. You will regret it if you don’t. It will be busy but if you want a wee addition you’ve got the support you need. Good luck and enjoy :tulip:

There was 9 years difference in my son and daughter.It was like starting all over BUT so what, he adored his baby sister and he was a lot of help too.If yall want to have another baby I say go for it.

My dad had another baby with his wife at the time and there’s a 10 year difference between him and myself. Honestly, I love it! It’s such a different bond than what I have with my other siblings who are closer to my age. I almost have a maternal type of bond with him.
I think your son would love it as well. Best of luck to you.

me & my sister are 11 years apart… not too sure how my mom handled it, tbh. when I was a baby my sister tried to sell me in a yard sale, a few years later I attacked her as “the debil”, & then our mom basically had her raising me… now we’re pretty close, it only took 14 years.

Age gap isn’t a problem at all… it’s actually nice having an older child helping out and enjoying the new addition :blush:


If your son is good with it and allllll the changes that come with it, not really a reason to hesitate.
My kids are 22, 14, and 2. I wish they hadn’t been quite so far apart, but God gave me them when he wanted to. First is not biologically mine. Neither of the bio ones were planned.

My oldest is 14, her sister 9 aaaaaaand I’m currently pregnant. I would like to have them closer in age but i waited until it was more financially feasible and i was emotionally ready. (My kids father passed away)

I’ve got 4 kids they are 11,9,3,&6months and I love the age gap and the relationship my eldest has with the 3 year old and how much of a help she is with the 6month old. My 9 year old loves to help with the baby but does like to pick fights with the 3 year old.

I say go for it! I always wanted to have another child so that my daughter would have a sibling but it didn’t work out. I regret it so much. I don’t think an age gap would be a problem at all

My nephew is 10 years older than my niece he’s now 22 and her 12 and they’re best of friends

I think its awesome. I am the oldest by 10 yrs w my sis and my bro was born when i was 16. I think its better bc kids get bonding time w parents. I loved my childhood and that time w my mom. No jealousy when siblings were born!

8 year gap with my boys. As the little gets bigger the older becomes more entertained by him :joy: and it’s great to have a helping hand if he’s willing to make a bottle or bring you a diaper, or watch him for 2 minutes while you go to the bathroom :joy: or even to sit in the backseat and console him in the car :woman_shrugging: I was initially worried about how my older son would deal but we kept him very involved in ultrasounds and name choice, announcement, baby shower, baby shopping etc, and he was very excited to be a big brother by the time the little arrived. Every family and everyone is different. I urge you to do what you feel is right for you, your spouse, and your son :heart: no one knows what’s right for you all better than you all :heart: best of luck with everything :heart:

I have kids with a 21 year age gap. The love between them is unbreakable.


That’s a good age difference! My sons are 15/13 and my baby is 10 months. They are so awesome caring loving and love to spend time with him and it allows me to get things done! NAP lol make real dinners! And they love to teach him so much :heart_eyes:

My daughter is 26 (Jan 20)and my son is 17 (Jan 17). I love the age difference. She was such a good helper when he was a baby and now she is his go to when he has something going on that he is uncomfortable telling me about. They are super close and there is nothing that they wouldn’t do for each other.

I kind of like that I had my kids so far apart. (My ex stepdaughter is 8yrs older than my bio daughter. And my oldest bio daughter is 7yrs older than my youngest). You get to enjoy those special early years with them quite individually. They all got mama’s undivided in the early years because the older ones were beginning to blossom into wanting to do their own thing. You’re 29. Have another. You’ll be fine! I had mine at 25 and 32. I survived haha and quite like the age gap. They still get your full attention in a way- because it’s so age group focused. Different needs, etc.

I have 7 yrs gap btw my kids n I m glad I had another as my son really needed a sibling… they love each other❤️

My children are 21 years apart in age. My son is 25 yrs old and my daughter is 4 yrs old. I feel like I have/am raising an only child twice. Definitely has benefits. I am one of five children. My oldest sister is 10 yrs older than me. My youngest sister and I are one year and two weeks apart in age. I have a closer relationship with my oldest sister.

I have a 21yr old, 16yr old, 13 yr old…and 2yr old twin girls. To be quite honest, my kids love them, but my older ones, except for the 21yr old, are at that age where it gets annoying to them to have to help, I guess more so because there’s 2 of them, so it becomes more of work rather than enjoyable to have a sibling 10+ plus yrs younger. Who knows, just don’t expect too much help from them, they’re kids still and have to enjoy their childhood, it isn’t enjoyable to them when they have to stay home and babysit while all their friends are out mall ratting or partying! But like I said, my situation may be alittle different, possibly because 2 is extra work! Lol

My oldest son is 25 years old and my youngest son is 6 months old; I wouldn’t have it any other way. My son is a huge help with the baby.

I have one that is 26 in march n a 18 yr old n 13 yr old. Other then I feel like I been raising kids for 26 yrs Haha.

Love the age gap! I have 7 kids and they age range from the oldest being 23 & the youngest being 3.All the other kids in between range from 4,6 & 10plus years apart.To me I think it’s alot easier than them being so close in age.The older ones help out a bunch & get a feel of what it’s like if they ever choose to have kids


My oldest is 24 and my youngest is 7 and I love it.

i have 8 years between each child and i wouldnt change it

Age gap isnt a problem at all. I have 3 children and they are 11, 7, and 3. They all like different things and want different things.

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I’m 24 and my youngest sister is 4(in June). I’m not close to my younger siblings because they have a different dad and youngest has a different mom. I hope the best for them but because they are still children I’m not that close. We still hug and say I love you(the ones who aren’t teens). I hear when they do become adults we will finally have a relationship. I’ll see in 5 years(if there’s still clean water or air lol)
I think it’s just in your head. But if it’s ok for you, go for it.

Mine are 7 years apart, personally I wish they were closer in age…my oldest has been in the Army 5 years and when he left, his brother was proud but very lonely. When my oldest comes home though, they’re like 2 little kids :laughing: but when he leaves it’s sad for my youngest.

My kids are 25 24 13 11 and 8. Honestly they are best friends. Yes they argue like all kids do but they love spending time together. I love just watching them. They are a blessing .

I had two boys that were 12 & 14 when I had my daughter after a remarriage. They are actually quite close. But the daughter was more like an only child.

My girls are 9 years apart and my oldest is the best big sister ever and she helps a lot!

My sister and I are seven years apart and couldn’t be more different. Despite mom trying her best to make us close, we shared no circle of friends, which when combined with no common interests and a maturity gap that seems worlds apart at that age and she was more of a stone around my neck than a joy. I got stuck filling in all the time gaps babysitting, I got held responsible for her bad choices because she was so much younger, and her injuries because she was so much smaller. A lot of parents saying they did it and loved it and that their kids are close on here, but that isn’t always the norm.

What did you have in common as a near middle school aged child with an infant? How much time did you want to spend around them at that age when you were noticing boys and putting your dolls behind you?

I encourage you to ask more than just other parents since it’s not just a parent who will be experiencing these changes. I also think it would be a good idea to talk to your ten year old about how he feels about going from an only child for ten years to having his peace quiet and solitude disrupted by two am feedings and four am fevers when he’s got big tests due at school the next day.

I have 14, 6 and 4 yo. I don’t find the nearly 9 year gap an issue

12 years between my eldest and youngest

I have an 18 year old son and 8 year old twins. It’s great coz now the eldest baby sits the twins when I go out! :rofl:

My kids are 26,25,24,16,12,2 …go for it!!!

Mine are 7 years apart and it’s amazing… He looks after and helps with his bro all the time xx

My girls are 10 years apart. I have 3 kids ages 12, 6 and 2. Its really interesting to see the way they are together with such a huge differece … nothing but love

11 years between my 2, it’s lovely as the older one gets to grow up and start end more freedom and you don’t notice so much az you have a little one to keep you busy. Also you have a built in babysitter when they’re a bit older :+1:

Kids…30, 23, 20, 19, 10. They’re all fine. And I’m not crazy yet.

My 2 daughters are now 20 & 27. Never a problem. They are close to one another & I got to enjoy each of them as they were growing up. I wanted them closer together but God had a different plan. I was 41 when I had my second daughter & I still felt great. I’m 61 now & I still feel good. Welcome life no matter how it turns out.

I have a 12 year old and 1 year old and it’s pretty great. She loves her younger brother and gets to help with him and also watch him grow up. I love it

Dont do it!!! worst mistake of my life!!!

Why not just incorporate red meat or fish? Way better than supplement especially for a baby?

Oh my god I wish I HADNT had all mine back to back!!! The kiddos that are the furthest apart (age 15 and age 4) are the closest you could imagine. My oldest two love on that 4 year old like you wouldn’t believe. My stepdaughters mother also had a baby less than a year ago and my stepdaughter is 14, and they are very close too. I actually think it’s good and can curb teen pregnancy because they know how much work it is.

My sons younger brother is 10 years apart and they love each other just the same! You and hubby do what you want!

I had 2 children, got divorsed and remarried. We whated one child together so when my first 2 were 8 & 9 we had one of our own. I wouldn’t give her up for anything but things sure were different. I was so over being a room mother and all the things little ones need. She was spoiled and she and her older sister never really got along. They still don’t. My husband died when our daughter was 20. It’s really been rough.

My children are seven years apart and I will say it did go better then I thought it would. My daughter was 7 play my son was born and things went well. My daughter could do certain things for herself, she understood things better then a younger child, and she was a great big sister. I just made sure though that she is a part of it and she could feed him pick out his clothes etc. Whatever you choose things will be good

Like everything in life, there are pros and cons. My kids are 22, 14, and 9. Having kids close together allows one to “get things done and over” faster. It also allows the kids to have potential playmates. But it is simetimes harder to have multuple kids at once and can be exoensive all at once. That wasn’t the case for me. As u see, I had my kids spread out. Having kids further apart allows kids to get more individual attention. It also allows you not to have to spend so much money all at once nor have burn-out so quickly. But you will be a hands-on parent for a longer period of time. Sometimes I wish I could go back in time and have my children closer together, and then other times I’m glad I didn’t. It all depends upon ur preferences. I know people who had multiple kids young and now are in their 40’s and “free.” Sometimes bored though. I know people who will have kids at home well into their 50’s. Again, it’s all about preference.

Our son is 8 and I’m prego with our second right now. It’s honestly been amazing seeing how excited he is to be a big brother and how he loves to help with getting everything ready for the new baby.

I was 17 when my brother was born. It was amazing and we had a really close relationship! I say go for it and enjoy a new baby!!!

My kids are 4 & 5, 10 & 11… boy & girl, boy & girl… best of friends…

Age Gap is awesome. I have a 12 and 8 year old from my first marriage and I have a 2 year old and a 9 month old. The older kids are so helpful.

I have three kids
Def feel like a first time mom but totally doable

Its awesome my oldest son 12 is great with the the youngest ones 4 and 3

My twins girls are 24 and my son is 9. Love it. Keeps me sane. Was 40 when I had my youngest

I’ve got a 7 soon to be 8 year old daughter and a 7 month old son… although he was a surprise baby lol but age gaps aren’t bad :slight_smile:

If u want another .Go for it.

That should be between you and your husband. Whatever you feel and your husband feel. Make a decision

There was 18 year’s difference between my oldest brother and my little sister. 11 years between me and my sister and we were the youngest. Having a later life baby kept my parents busy and younger.

If you have doubts, sit on it. Think hard about what’s important to you in your years ahead. (My oldest is 29 and my youngest is 13.) love every hair on all 4 of my children’s heads. There will become a time when you will want to be selfish and travel, start your own life back up again, and do whatever you want. If children are what you truly want, then go for it. But please know that kids will be your full time focus. You’ll have to give yourself up for quite awhile to raise them well. Oh—and there’s always the possibility of Grandchild to look forward to!

My daughter is 10 years younger than my youngest son. My kids ages:
Boy - 22
Boy - 15
Boy - 13
Girl - 2.5
I thought it’d be weird but my boys absolutely love her. She is spoiled rotten. I’m 39 so I can tell you DO IT NOW cause once you mid to late 30’s it exhausting to say the least.

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My oldest was 16 when my daughter was born. He loved her like she was his own. It’s definitely a challenged to have a baby at 40 she’s so active and takes up a lot of our time but I love it. He passed away when she was 1 1/2 and she clung to his things and memory until
She understood he wasn’t coming back. She a lot better now my only con would be doing holidays all over again. We had past that part now she’s into theme parks and guess who has to ride and keep up, us old folks. It’s still a blessing

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My youngest children are 21 years apart and it’s amazing so many things I do differently so many things the same but either way I’m so in love and older wiser and not such a struggle. I was 18 with 3 kids it was so hard but we made it my youngest now I was 40 when she was born and now she is 6. Definitely had more energy but no time to spend with had to work2 job go to school. Now I stay home and work while she is in school and I don’t miss anything. I’m so thankful I received a 2nd chance.

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Ready for this?! I have 4 kids and their ages are 20, 14, 6 and 5 :exploding_head: I have had both scenarios (close together and far apart). I much prefer the far apart! :100: By the time I had my next baby I did not have to deal with jealousy, age regression, extreme sibling rivalry, etc. Now my last two…its a nightmare. The only thing they did/do not have is the rivalry; but I know its coming when the teenage years do

I have a 5 year age gap between my kids. It’s nice cause the older one helps with the baby. She did regress a little bit when he was brought home and had to get used to sharing mama but after that it’s been great

My brother and I are 10yrs apart and hes my most favorite person ever. And the my oldest is 26 and my youngest is 8. Shes love having an little sister. I have 6 btw lol but if u want just 1, that’s fine. Its 100% up to u if u want more

My kids are only two years apart but I’m giving my opinion on finally having a sibling when I was 9. I wanted a brother or sister until he came along and then I hated him :joy:. My had little time for me between working and taking care of a newborn on top of all the household work. I would want to go skating or to the movies and I couldn’t because my brother was a baby and my mom didn’t have anyone to watch him. I also have a sister who is 14 years younger and a brother who is 17 years younger. I ended up moving in with my dad because I couldn’t handle it anymore. I had to share a room with my 14 year younger sister and she would wake me up and would be so tired at school. You do what you want but also consider how it will affect the older child. You can say you will make time for the older child but sometimes easier said then done. I wish you luck in this tough decision

My boys are 7 years apart
My oldest is now 17 and my youngest is 9. It is pretty awesome because my oldest got to help with his little brother and now being that he drives and is in high school it is more helpful. He helps by picking his brother up from school and getting him off the bus.

I have a 23 yr old son and a 5yr old son.My 5yr old was a surprise had him when i was 40.Im loving every minute of it he keeps me on my toes for sure.Now I’m a grandma to a 1 yr old girl and get to enjoy both.Now my 5yr old is a uncle to my 1yr old granddaughter.Gods blessings

I was 18 when my brother was born and we are really close I don’t think the age gap matters if anything I think it’s good as I helped my mum when she needed it

I have 2 daughters 10 years apart! My oldest is 21 and my baby is 11. They are the best of friends! My little one calls her sister everyday and they just talk. They are the best of sisters. My oldest was great when I had her sister. She loved helping me take care of the baby

My oldest daughter is 17 years older than my youngest daughter. It is the sweetest relationship. Baby girl is 4 and thinks her biggest sister hung the moon. Big sister thinks baby B is the best thing ever and loves her to absolute bits. I say have another baby if that is what you want.

Perfect I have a 21 year old daughter 15 year old daughter n 13 year old son my adult daughter taking vacation for spring break n coming to kidnap her brother n sister for a week we moved due to hubby getting a better job my adult daughter making g bank where she at so she driving 2 1/2 hours to get these helions lol

I always wanted a lil girl but it just wasn’t working out- but eventually we conceived our girl and when she was born, our boys were 14&16 years old. They love her dearly- and starting over was kinda fun. I gained a different perspective on motherhood- being a little older myself, I have a greater understanding of the ages and stages and a lot more patience

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My daughters are 9 years apart (13 and 4). I think the only real struggle is finding family friendly things everyone is interested in (have a toddler boy too). Thier bonds are still strong even though theres a gap.

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My daughter was 9 when I had my second. I enjoyed my first daughter to the fullest. My oldest was able to help at times but it was almost like having your 1st all over again just wiser…

My children are 29, 26, 16 and 9. There are 20 years and 6 days between my oldest and youngest. While it was nice for the oldest 2 to be close in age, it’s also been a beautiful relationship between the oldest kids and the younger 2. Yes it will tie you down again but babies are always a blessing :blush:

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Mine was almost 11years apart and the older child was a great help

I was born 15 years after my siblings- 4 sisters and 1 brother.
They had a whole life with my parents.
When I was a little girl they all got married. I played with my nieces and nephews all My Age. We grew up together. My parents died when I was in my teens. 14 when my father died 19 when mother died. I reconnected with my siblings when I became a mom and married. My husband had 3 girls the age of my daughter.
My connection now with my sisters is very tight. It’s about 29 years of solidarity.
I’m 20 years younger than my eldest and 15 from my closest aged sister.

Today I’m 53. My sisters are 73, 71, 69. I lost a sister at age 61, and my brother is currently 72.

Growing up I was a middle child. I have a sister 2 years older and a sister 8 years younger. I was close to both after 18 until my little sister started moving away all the time. Our bond is nonexistent now, but we were really close despite the age difference until that happened. My step kids are 33 and 25. My kids are 11, 9 and 2. My 11 year old tries to be a mom to both. The 9 & 11 year old fight constant. But they are both so sweet and helpful to the 2 year old. I’m so so glad we tried for her. I was overwhelmed with the 2 kids on my own (hubby works on the road) but this time around is not bad since the big girls are at school all day, it’s one on one time with my little one. Then when they get home they all play together.

Does it count that I made my hubby do it? He had a daughter from a prior that was 22 when we had our first. She LOVED having a baby sis and bro.

My sister & I are 16 yrs apart. My brother was 17 was older. See was a gift because our Dad passed away suddenly 1 week before my sister graduated from high school she was a comfort for my Mom

We have a daughter who will be 8 next month and a 7 week old and personally we love it. Our oldest loves being big sister and helping and I feel like I got to really enjoy her younger years and will get to with baby sister as well.

My older 3 are 19, 17, and 13. The youngest is 6 months. I love it because I have all of the patience and wisdom I wish I had for the first 3.

My daughter and her brothers are 10 and 15 years apart. There was never any problems and they are all very close.

My oldest sibling and I are 12 years apart and we are the closest out of the four of us. We have two brothers between us but my sister and I have a bond like no other.

My 2 oldest are 11 years apart. I have a 3yr old, 13 (almost 14 yr old) and an 8mos old. Having the 2 far apart was great, the 2 boys close together though are a handful and test my sanity daily :joy:

There is a 22 year age difference between my youngest two

I currently have a 21 year old. 17. 11 and three year old! An age gap can be nice.

My boys are 9yrs apart. They 20 and 11. The oldest asked for the youngest.

1 is ok to have. You dont have to have another. Im sure your son will be jealous of the new baby. I was when my bro was born and we are 8yrs apart. It was always playing favourites in the end.