Watching pornography is not a sign of manhood. It is a sign that something is wrong. I suggest you find a mentor for him who will help him to navigate this challenging period of time, and don’t leave it up to him to ‘figure out’.
7 Likes
Direct him to safe free porn sites so that he doesn’t run up a bill.
17 Likes
How old is the son, I’ve always sugar coated things for my son however when returning home this week he was taught puberty and periods. Personally my son is 9 and I don’t hide my body I’d rather normalise a women’s body than one on the Internet. If he felt the need to look I would have a conversation about it to understand why he did it but I don’t think I would punish him for being curious. All children develop at different stages and having a open dialogue is key so your child at any age can confide in you.
9 Likes
You should just introduce him to “incognito mode” that way you’ll never have to catch him out 
1 Like
Just big hugs momma. My baby is 16 and I cry often that there’s no more little boy stuff. He’s 6’3" and gorgeous. I’m so proud of him. I just miss his little chunky baby self
13 Likes
If it was me and my son, I wouldn’t worry too much about it (depending on age and maturity level). Sexual curiosity as a teen is natural, normal and not something to be ashamed of. I wouldn’t shame him for it or try to embarrass him, but I think I would have a conversation about porno situations vs. real sex and, of course, safety. Because, here’s the thing: we can’t stop them, but we can help them navigate it safely.
3 Likes
Hi! My 10-year-old who just turned 11 a couple days ago has been going through pre-puberty hits the starter on level was over 600 at 10 years old. He has acne his voice is changing he had a huge growth spurt he’s like 57 with a size 9 1/2 foot. All these things are changing on my 10-year-old and it’s like I don’t know how to handle it because he’s my firstborn, and you don’t expect at 10 years old to have to deal with the stuff right away you can message me if you want and we can talk because I’ve been wanting to find someone who’s going through the same thing. I know like 1415-year-old boys a lot of people Obviously know how to deal with it by then but when it’s your little kids so it’s really hard
2 Likes
Oh I dred this when my baby grows up, I have a long way to go. No matter if one thinks it’s appropriate or not, he should feel like the lines of communication are open if he has questions or concerns…to be taught about safe sex, or even sexting!! People need to understand depending on your state a teen sexting another teen nude photos can have them labeled as a sex offender… so the fact it’s just naked women is great…he needs to be educated on the very real possibility of what comes next after looking…if he likes someone/meets someone, protection…just be honest. Say hey, Im sorry I invaded your privacy a bit, I noticed this… it might be time to have a more in depth question and answer. Good luck!!
10 Likes
My daughter’s were curious as well. I spoke to them about how it was Inappropriate at their ages but that I understood their curiosity. I also spoke to them about how porn is not what and how sex is. And then I installed family link on their phones and devices so that I could block things that are not age appropriate for them.
12 Likes
Depends on what you mean by “becoming men”. Their bodies may look mature, but we know the brain doesn’t fully mature until they are at least mid twenties. Thea have them what they need to know about hygiene, respect and work along the way.
Educate him… That’s all I can say. Most kids these days know alot by then. Just have the talk and make sure he understands how serious certain things are. 
17 Likes
He’s curious! Just be open and honest. That it’s ok to explore sexuality but he needs to do it safely and realize a lot of what you find on the internet is not how it really is. And hopefully you’ve had the safe sex talk! That the only 100% way to prevent pregnancy is abstinence. And that even if a girl is on BC you still need to use condoms because of STDs. Of course depending on his age is how much you tell him lol
What’s oldest ?
Who the heck gives a kindergartner a phone?
Why does a Kindergartner have to have a phone?
I mean I wouldn’t let my kindergartener unsupervised let alone with a pbone of their own.
Then we wonder why kids have identity issues and behavior issues. God forbid we let them figure it out self regulating without electronics. I have 6 kids and none of them had a pbone until they were 13yrs old, did their chores and showed responsibility.
Im just shaking my head at this one
6 Likes
My son will be 20yrs old in April and I still have not gotten over it. He is still my baby and always will be.
Mine went threw this stage also it is normal. In MY opinion, just have a talk with him about what he is searching on the internet.
I would have a talk with him but I wouldn’t “punish” him by taking his phone away for doing something every teen does….seems kinda silly to me to punish your kid for being curious and/or needing a release….there’s much worse he could be doing
28 Likes
How old is your son? It’s going to happen no matter what you do unfortunately. All you can do is talk to him about what he’s going through and talk about safe sex. He didn’t do anything wrong by looking up naked women. And if you try to stop him from having urges and make him think it’s bad then that can cause issues in the future.
16 Likes
I have a shoe box filled with nude mags and other things for my son. He is getting older and it’s a natural thing to be curious I just check in every once in awhile to see if things need to be replaced. And do so that way it removed the embarrassment he may feel.
However so far my son is very open and honest with me and talks about sexual things is accepted without judgment.
1 Like
He is only doing what nature intended for him. Now is the time to teach sex is a wonderful natural thing and nothing to be ashamed of or punished for being interested in. Also time for him to learn what underaged means,contraception is and consensual sex means.
1 Like
It’s normal for any teen. Nowadays that’s how they learn. So many parents afraid to talk about sex and the purity of ones body.
Those are totally different conversations.
4 Likes
Just be open and honest with him. I have a 16 (soon 17) year old and he will come to me for ANYTHING and EVERYTHING, embarrassing, personal, little stuff, big stuff…I’m just honest with him. Some times he does better with a text than face to face convo; I am still honest with him and tell him the truth to questions he has
21 Likes
How old is he? Not at all condoning porn or anything of the like, but googling “naked women” is a whole lot better than searching for some kind of porn! Curiosity is normal, but it is important for him to understand that most of those pictures are not realistic.
2 Likes
I saw the same on my sons phone. He is 13. I didnt say anything about it because I didn’t want to embarrass him BUT the next day we had a very long sex talk and I explained everything he hated it but I don’t care I had him at 18 and I don’t want the same future for him… Good luck 
43 Likes
I think teaching him to respect women and that they aren’t sexual objects would be a good start, but I dont think naked women for a teenage boy is inherently wrong. They’re curious and sex is a part of life, normal to feel urges and pleasure, but teaching consent and respect are so huge to do now
Its natural to have sexual feelings and curiosity. However young teens should not be looking at photography. Its inappropriate.
5 Likes
My son just turned 18 and graduated all in the same week… I’ve caught things (inappropriate) on his phone a few time since he was 16 its honestly just the age…he is curious I didn’t punish him for it although I did have a talk with him about what you see in porn is not real life and no woman should be treated like that. He is a brother to 4 girls so he gets it now and understands respect.
8 Likes
I freaked out when my son was looking at porn on his phone at 12. He is now a shy 16 year old that can’t even talk to girls. I guess I would rather him looking at porn than making me a young grandma
Boys are going to experiment. It’s natural. My son will be 14 in sept. I’m going through it all right now with him. Talk to him about it. Just don’t make him feel shameful because of his curiosity. It’s all a part of life and he’s going to experience it all one day anyway.
2 Likes
So I have an 11 year old. I decided to read the post to him. His response “oh mom you don’t have to worry about me, that stuff don’t interest me, at least not yet.” He went on to tell that because I’ve always been open and honest he doesn’t feel the need to sneak. He knows if he is curious about something just to ask us. So my response to this is maybe being more honest with your babies so they don’t feel the need to lie.
6 Likes
My son is 20 & I promise you they will find a way. ESP as teens. Whether on a laptop or phone. They are curious about women’s bodies & honestly he is prob hitting puberty pretty strong and his body is going crazy. I had my husband speak to my son & I did separately - we used it as a opportunity to discuss safe sex, and the importance of consent. I would take the phone at bedtime if it makes it better but having a phone at all-he is going to look. My son hit puberty early so he was into the female body pretty early as well. He is going to do it-be open and honest with him & again use it as the perfect time to discuss and answer any questions. & don’t shame him. It’s important that he grows up comfortable with his body.
3 Likes
My sons 13 and caught him looking up porn for the first time. Told him its normal but its inappropriate for his age and thsts for adults. I know it’s natural but my young son is not going to be glued to porn videos thinking that’s what sex is like… especially the stuff on the internet today. Plenty of time for that in the future. Just have a talk with him and move on. They are going to be curious but hes going to have to use his imagination from here on out😬
4 Likes
Educate not punish. He’s already started to show that he’s curious. Maybe get a book yourself or read some articles and educate your self more. Does he have a father or father figure if you’re uncomfortable?
3 Likes
You took it away bc he’s curious, naturally? He’s gonna find any way to look. Better to find sites that won’t give him viruses that make you replace the phone every X months.
4 Likes
We are so quick to let our kids grow up with the use of technology but then when they a curious about the opposite sex we want to punish them for using the electronics that we gave to them at an early age. Just doesnt make sense to me…Having a talk about the birds and the bees wouldn’t hurt 
2 Likes
I don’t really consider becoming interested in naked bits “becoming men” but I just talk with them about enthusiastic consent for themselves and others and that porn is like action movies… professionals with years of experience and a full group of on set people to support
1 Like
I personally don’t believe porn is healthy but it’s definitely something everyone at some point is curious of I think it builds an unrealistic idea of sex and can hard wire the Brain to always need that stimulation even when they find their sex partner later on to each their own but it is definitely a embarrassing topic so best of luck you got this mama
1 Like
Honey the last thing u should’ve done was took that phone cuz he gonna see it some where trust me!! My son had porn downloaded on his DS u can’t keep him from it! It’s everywhere! He can see it on tv!!
1 Like
Mama YOU are not ready for the change but he is. Leave him be, give back the phone and teach him as long as he respects women/girls he will be fine. It’s totally natural.
2 Likes
I don’t have a son but I have a brother and was raised around my uncles (only girl in my family besides my mom and now 8 month old daughter) but if I were in your situation I would have the “talk” and tell him it’s not appropriate for his age and tell him he needs to respect women and part of that is not looking up naked women. Unfortunately he is a teen boy and most if not all of his friends are going to be looking up naked women/talking about it, watching porn and the whole 9 yards so naturally he will be curious. But he’s still old enough to know it’s not appropriate even if his friends are doing it. (Personal opinion/advice, you don’t have to listen. Good luck momma!
)
1 Like
Have gone through it with mine. Made me
Numb. Confused. Sad. Disgusted. But I also had to accept that they have reached the age where they are curious of sexuality. Doesn’t mean I allow it. But they still do it. I’ve now chosen to ignore as they are 22 and 17
Don’t punish your kids for natural curiosity. Instead, sit down and have an ooen conversation about what he’ll find on the web and the unrealistic views it can create.
3 Likes
We found some searches on his phone my husband flipped out I told him it was normal for the age but I did make sure we had the talk I did make dad do it though and we made sure to also ask him if he was getting abused and that he could always tells us things and safety in case it’s inevitable when they get older the best wayy to approach it is to not get angry and just have a conversation about it and make sure they feel comfortable coming to you about stuff ours is 14 soon so we went through this
I have no advice concerning teenaged boys as i have only girls. But in this…talk to him. Be open and honest about your feelings and concerns about what he is looking at/for on the internet. Taking away his phone seems a bit much. If anything get parental apps to monitor what he searches out. Hes curious and its normal. Your xoing awesome mom
I’d better talk with him and be open minded because if u punish this it’ll be bad and a pregnant teenager is in ur future
1 Like
that’s something all boys will eventually do, you should respect his privacy.
2 Likes
The heros heart book on Amazon helped me alot when my son was hitting teenage yrs.
It has nothing to do with if your ready. Maybe show him some art books with men and eonen naked… he wants to see… its not bad unless you make it bad… maybe he needs tp ask questions… raise a glid kid not one thats feels he cant ask and has to sneak…
1 Like
Had this exact problem with the 9 yr old he’s not even the oldest he was looking at porn and asked his step-aunt to take her sweater off so he could see her boobs bttr caused a huge ordeal we had to sit him down and explain sexual harassment and that a boy his age should not b asking women these thing nor looking at any1 naked man or woman period definitely had to have a grown up conversation about it all telling him everything he could and couldn’t do and say and couldn’t say ECT… It was horrible but had to b done he doesn’t look at or say anything sexual anymore after he was told the concequences of what his behavior was going to lead to (prison)
How old is he? Its always better to have the talk with them and let them know they can ask you any questions they need to. My now grown son has asked me some serious ones and is very grateful for me always being approachable even in uncomfortable convos lol
That’s what all boys do eventually. If he doesn’t as some point i think I’d be more concerned 
I’m right there with you!! My boy is 13… it’s like he went from my baby boy to half grown over night! He’s now taller than me
Y’all…this is not related to this post, but related to porn. When my oldest daughter was 11 or 12 (we have two they are 12 & almost 19 now) I wanted to show her a pair of shoes I saw at socks sporting goods. I told her she can probably find them online and if she likes them, I would get them. This was before they had an app or if they did, I did not know about it. I was doing something else also and not really paying much attention…she was trying to google the tennis shoes and could not find them. I said, they were at dicks. Just go to dicks.com and search for them. A second later she gasped and said oh…no. That’s so not it! She could not close out of it fast enough and more stuff kept popping up I couldn’t help it I laughed so damn hard! It’s now a joke, but I am pretty sure she was mortified. Come to find out, the website is “dickssportinggoods.com”
I feel this mine turns 11 next month and been having issues with “pitching tents” randomly. He gets so upset and keeps asking what to do and I’m like idk I never had one!
My then 8 year old had Pornhub on his phone and I about DIED!!! Some kid at his first sleepover told him about it and also showed everyone his butthole lol 
like no! I was ready to hide under a rock once I seen what he saw. He now has an immense amount of restrictions on his phone, Xbox, and every technology in our home. He also had a long embarrassing talk (probably more so for me) about how porn is NOT reality at ALL, he also knows that sex is for adults, what is illegal when it comes to personal space, safe touch, and that he is not to influence any other children with what he saw ever. He is almost 10 now and haven’t had a problem since. I started to be extremely truthful with him (age appropriate) that way he will continue being open and honest with me too. I know how kids are, I just want him to know the reality of it all. 
It is HARD though, so solidarity momma!
1 Like
At least it was woman and not girls his age. Saves the police a visit to your house.
The crossroad we find ourselves in as mums as we have to find a way to say bye to our little boys and hello to the adult man, is a challenge. This stage is no longer about actively protecting them the same way, as we would have when they were little and rather I view it as now a guide, support and boundaries stage. something you are going to have to accept is they are capable of making their own choices, decisions and some of those will be wrong. Back yourself for the parent you have always been to instil confidence in his ability to make good choices. It’s no longer our role to make those for them but to guide & support them in the lessons ahead. Ultimately if we don’t, it will end up being a power struggle between you both and if he is seeking answers he will find them elsewhere. It is by far the hardest challenge to accept our children are growing and fast. You are on the same team and you are on his side. Be honest, be understanding and set safe boundaries. Work with each other and continue to communicate often. All the best mum, it’s a challenge gig this mumhood, GOODLUCK 
I do t think it’s right to chastise a child for looking up things they are naturally attracted to. My son is 11 and we’ve already talked about boyfriends, girlfriends, gay, lesbian and hetero. I have noticed that at this time I need to in a sense “try” to be the cool friend mom so they can feel comfortable telling me things. So far it’s working bc my son tells me a lot. I also give info and educate. After our talks we usually go do something random
1 Like
I told my son it was 100% normal to have desires and it’s 100% normal to masterbate and I explained the dangers of looking at pornography. I explained it’s addictive and I’d prefer that he not do it. I did tell him masterbation is normal and healthy and his desires are normal and healthy. That’s how I handled it. My son cried and said he felt sick over having feelings about girls and he didn’t now if he was normal. It was a relief for him. Having that happen is such a huge guilty thing and I’m sure having an open conversation is best so he can trust you and feel safe coming to you in future to tell you for example if he wants to actually have sex.
My oldest son is turning 25 next month and we have a very honest and open relationship,
Mine is 12 and says he isnt really interested in girls yet, BUT last week we were doing a river float and I couldnt help but notice his eyes drifting from bikini body to bikini body and I think its starting haha NOT excited to find things like that on his phone lop
Oh momma, hang on until they’re 21…it is a rollercoaster of a ride. I was told once, “If you raised then right, they will come back.” Be open, it’s hard but you can survive your second time in the teens.
My 2 sons are 37 and 29. Yep, I remember that…very awkward lol. They turned out to be great men 
The best thing that you can do is keep an open dialog in your home. Don’t avoid any questions and be 100% honest with all of your answers.
Why do you need to get a hold of your kindergarten child on their own phone? 
Whatever you do please avoid shaming him for his curiosity. This is a completely natural process. It seems like it’s time for a talk about the changes he is experiencing and to remind him that it is a normal part of his development and nothing to be ashamed of but he needs to keep those moments private to protect himself. Honestly is the best policy here and providing him with knowledge in a respectful manner will give you a fantastic foundation for future communication. He will feel much better coming to you for advice or help if he needs it knowing you are on his side and not judging him for his feelings. Good luck momma!
At least it wasn’t your family computer?
Way back in 2010 my parents found my older brother was watching porn when he virused the family computer in the kitchen… He’s not a porn or sex addict… My dad sat him down and had some talks about sex, std’s , how it wasn’t like porn, and about safe porn sites … As far as I know the computer didn’t get another virus after so I guess he either stopped or took my dad’s advice… When my mom tried to talk to him about sex (she also tried teaching him to put a condom on a banana) it lasted about 30 seconds before he ran screaming embarrassed… (I wasn’t there for that one however I really wish I was… My sex talk was essentially “don’t” )
Your 5 year old had a phone and your surprised now that he’s older he’s looking up naked women? You kinda let him.
Talk to him. It’s puberty and I’d rather it happen on his phone looking at that instead of sneaking behind my back and meeting someone in person.
How old is he? Just have to teach him not getting caught is part of the game.
2 Likes
I dont. I just go with the flow. All children grow up eventually. Better to be the mom that helps them out and is there to chat and ask questions VS shame them.
Also, when I caught mine (preteen) I suggested he look up swimsuit models & trampoline jumpers ) terrible but more suitable for his age imho. I also added that porn isn’t real so even if he saw stuff, real life wasn’t like that and I don’t want him assuming it is.
My oldest is 13, I am not ready for this either…lol
Anyone saying it’s “not appropriate” at this age is wrong. We have a huge issue in the United States where we make the human body talking about it. Talking about sex a wrong thing. If he is looking it up. It is the PERFECT TIME to talk to him. Because he is going to keep looking just not where he knows you will see it since he will fear punishment. Like anything else if it’s coming up it’s a good time to discuss it gage your conversation to his age and get feedback from him to find out what he already knows. Where he is and what he is curious about and have a talk with him. He is getting older either way. If you want him to or not is not stopping it. Talk to him normal about it and it eliminates the fear to discuss these things. This is how you make it through the transition to manhood maintaining a strong relationship with your son
Don’t make him feel he’s in trouble for doing something natural
If he has goggle or an iPhone you can block inappropriate content using parental controls .
my sons 9 and we had the sex/puberty talk a lloonngg time ago and i revisit the subject anytime i feel it’s needed.
This is normal and a good time to educate him on sex, protection, etc.
3 Likes
Can’t wait to have these talks with my son 
This is why my son doesn’t have a phone and won’t for a while. I’m trying to maintain his innocence for as long as possible and so far it’s working
What’s there to handle? It’s normal. Just make sure he’s educated
I tell my boys that if they want to look at that stuff let me know I will buy them DVDs magazines anything they want but that it is not to be looked at on any electronic device via the web due to the fact that 1 it can be illegal and 2 I want to make sure that there isnt any virus or tracking info being downloaded that they dont know about
Hi umm sweetie give him back the phone. Talk to him about ur feelings n maybe just maybe he will tell u his. Main thing is this…JUST BREATHE. He will be fine if u just communicate with him.
Open communication is key, don’t embarrass him and don’t yell. It just makes them do it more
Ok I will just say this…WTF gives their kindergartener a phone??
2 Likes
I will never understand holding on to children like this
That’s normal mommas don’t need to know everything
1 Like
It’s natural for boys to do that. When my son was that age we found a safe site for him to look at. Then porn hub came around. Let him do it don’t punish him and embarrassed him. It’s natural.
2 Likes
Your not being ready has no comparison in importance to your child’s pace of growing up. It’s a hard pill, truly, but it’s better to educate and inform him than to attempt to suppress his curiosity. My son, my youngest is turning 20 this month. All Love
1 Like
Even without a phone hes still going to donit
Better than naked men 
Taken away for him being curious? Interesting.
Just have the talk about the birds and the bees and be open and kind and understanding because you don’t want them hiding important things. Mine turned 18 last week. Now I just Cross my fingers and hope I did a good job.
I’m convincing myself my son is asexual because I’m not ready for the truth lol
1 Like
Its gonna happen either way. As long as it wasnt violent or degrading stuff he looked at id stay out of it
O.o I wouldn’t have taken his phone away … It’s natural to want to look. Taking his phone will only put a wall up between you and him and he won’t talk to you about stuff later when it really matters because of the way you reacted to this.
Well he’s not a baby anymore. All boys do this it’s just on their phone now and not their dads playboy mags. 
I’d just educate about porn and how most of it isn’t real. It’s kind of like movies on TV but about sex. Imagine watching some wild shit and then he gets a gf and thinks fisting is the norm safe sex education too.
That change is going to happen whether you mommas want it to or not. I’m not looking forward to it either but I know it’s going to happen. I also think it’s wrong to try to completely shut it down. Interest is nothing to be ashamed of
1 Like
Oh you don’t lmao
Mine will be 26 next week and I still see my green eyes blonde haired dimpled little cherub
But always talk to him. Be honest make him comfortable and don’t judge him.
Always ALWAYS keep those lines of communication open and you will have a direct line to every thing going on in his life
Start by not punishing him for being curious. Educate him instead.
I mean it’s life unfortunately
But I’d tell my boys
They shouldn’t be doing that ……
that’s me though
But it happens
Crazy how fast they grow up
Use it as a learning experience