Go to a women’s refuge they will help you out
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A narcissist cant be a great dad.
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Talk to some lawyers and shelters. Abuse isn’t always physical and there are resources to help you escape the abuse.
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You will get alimony and child support. Contact your local woman haven office, they offer alot of help and advice.
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Bull, first off you do work. More than he does. You’re a stay at home mom. Secondly, he would have to leave tje house, you have the kids (also depends on state laws) but most judges will grant you the house alimony and child support for the kids to maintain their lifestyle. Know your worth!! He owns nothing. You own it together. DO NOT let him make you feel less than you are. You are important to your family. You are the glue for the kids. See what resources are available to you. FEAR NO MAN!! Honey, I wish you the best. First thing to know is what your standards are. If he’s not meeting them, haul azz!!
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I’m not sure what state your in however in California there is state general assistance. Apply for all the help. The social worker will help. And free daycare for working moms. If there is abuse, there is always a place to stay for woman and children. But that’s California
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You know your marriage is over. So the next step should be to start taking some money and stashing it. You say he’s a good father, he isn’t if the kids are witnessing him throwing your stuff away and verbally abusing you. You need to make a plan do you have family that could help you? Talk to an attorney or a woman’s shelter, they will help you get out of there. Do you have family or a trusted friend where you can bring some of your important stuff to keep, kids birth certificates, important papers, jewelry anything that is important to you and the kids, some clothing and toys for kids, Don’t mention anything about you leaving until you have a plan set in place, because I’m guessing once he finds out he’s going to go on a rampage. Good luck, please leave you and the kids deserve a better life than this
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If you stay you have nothing so what are you losing? You will be surprised at what you will be entitled too. Know your worth and get your ducks in a row. Leave him and take your babies and RUN!
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Womens aid will help you. I’ve been in that situation before womens aid helped regain my confidence and independence
Grab your stuff and your kids and leave. He’ll have to pay you spousal support and child support.
Hopefully you have family that can help you while you get on your feet. He will have to pay child support and possibly spousal support depending on how long you’ve been married. If you acquired the house while married half of it is yours… try to find a lawyer through a women’s group… put yourself and your children first. You can do anything you set your mind too! Good luck!
Don’t be a baby , stop crying, get a job , and leave him . If he is a bad husband he is a bad father. If you are married the house is yours too . You children deserve better. Good luck and God Bless.
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Start pouring all of your energy into YOU! Become the best version of yourself, be the best mom you can be and see how he follows suit! 
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Search for free attorney consultations
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If he throws your stuff away when angry. That is abuse…
Depending on where you reside you may be entitled to half of everything.
As a thrice survivor of domestic violence I promise you as scary as it seems. You got this!
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Find a women’s shelter and go honey. They can get you started. And help you get on your feet
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Just leave. There is never a good time and always excuses not to
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Thsts abuse. You need a shelter and to get your kids away from that. Say he’s a great dad all you want, but ask yourself do you want them to grow believing that’s how relationships work? Just grab a fee necessities get your kids and go. Details can be wrkd out later. Find some place safe
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Take the first step and talk to a counselor at one of the females with children shelters. They will not force you to do anything, but, they will explain how they might help. You do not mention kids’ ages nor yours. You might be surprised what you can do, the counselor will help you to understand your options and would know about any help for your re-education to improve your job skills.
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If you’re married you also own the house.
How old? if they’re school age, get a job during the day and start stacking money
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Check local solicitors. Most offer 1 hour free advice. Speak to friends and family, theres always a way out x
If he treats you bad he’s not a great Dad. He is teaching your children that this is the way you treat the people you love. They will either act that way if they are boys or will find a man that will treat them that way if they are girls. Reconsider your choices.
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Start Planning. Open an account, tuck away money. Do you have Family/Friends? Get a consultation with a lawyer. When you’re ready file for Legal Separation this will protect you from being responsible for any new credit lines he opens. It will also make Him responsible for financially supporting you and the children until a divorce is final. Good luck🍀
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5 years ago, I was a stay at home mom to two kids, and my then husband was the breadwinner. I didn’t have an income, I was the homemaker. When we ended things I had no money, and no clue where or how to move forward. You take it day by day and do your best. If you have to go stay with family, then so be it. You find a job and you rebuild your life, single and happy (eventually). It’s about attitude and not staying down in the gutters feeling sorry for yourself! I am a firm believer in if you want to, you will!
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Ok so stick it out for a while longer but every week that he gets paid set some of his check aside unnoticed if you can. After a year of you can do it you should have enough saved up to get out. Also look into places that help with women get out of abusive relationships. They will house you and your children but you will have to get a job and work so that way you can get on your feet. They offer child care and everything.
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Do not leave the kids with him. If he’s a narcissist right now you’re his victim. He can turn the kids onto you because he will be upset you left him. See if you can find a lawyer who can offer free advice. Do you have any friends? Any family? Go to them. Ask for help. I hope you’re able to find your happiness!
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Here in the US half of everything is your and you might even get alimony and child support
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My mom told me when your finally done that you will leave even if it means starting fresh with nothing I left my oldest daughters father when I was fed up with everything I packed up my personal sentamental belongings and clothes for me and my kid and left I stayed in a family homeless shelter and went up to w2 office to get help with childcare and finding a job and the shelter had a program to help get us into an apartment I spent about a month in the shelter once I got into an apartment it was just a 1 bedroom to start but they had a place that helped get us beds and furnishings and dishes and towels and sheets from donations that people gave away just take it a day at a time and keep pushing forward and dont look back you can do it and will be better off
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Not sure where you are located
I’m in canada
There are many programs that will help you. Please google them!
However, you will be AMAZED at how much you can accomplish with a HEALTHY mindset. Maybe try to get a part time job to work and save up some money as you plan your way out!
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Girl even if he owns the house most of the time the judge will make him leave because you will probably have the kids. Specially if he has issues with alcohol. Your the wife half is yours whether it’s in his name or not. The abuse shelters are great too. They help you get on your feet and keep you safe. Just have to be strong and push on. I’m sure you have it in you. For the kids sake. Kids feel when there is something going on between the parents. Leave hun. I left my ex for that reason. The well being of my children will always come first, before any relationship I have.
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Seven years ago I left with nothing but my 2 kids and a dog. I stayed with friends for one month and got job two hours from my ex so he would leave me alone he was stalking me and the kids I slept in floor for a few months worked as hostess at Olive Garden then job as preschool teacher. Been seven years of dealing with him long distance now I own my own doublewide in a beach town I love my kids are so happy and ofthe age where they choose not to go see him
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You owe it to yourself and your kids to be happy, just go and never look back, you’ll sort everything out as you need to. Good luck.
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When you do leave go to a shelter that’s far away they will help you with what you need I’m single and in a wheelchair and was scared to leave in my situation but it was the best move I made Bless you in whatever you decide for you and your 2 little ones 
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The best choices we make are never easy or quick ones. Once you leap it may take time but everything will work out. If he’s not a reflection of how you want your children to act, make a plan and GO!!! Life is too short to be unhappy and be someone else’s scape goat for destruction!! I did it, you can do it too!! Prayers and well wishes!!! Be strong momma! 
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1-800-799-SAFE this is the domestic violence hotline you can call them if you need anything they can get you a bus ticket home to your family or even find a shelter or put you up in a motel room. Listen to me he will never change for you or anyone else and eventually your children will treat you or someone else the same way by watching what he is doing or they may think this is they way they are supposed to be treated.
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If he’s a terrible husband then he is NOT a good father. He is teaching your children exactly what is to be expected in relationships and marriage so that’s far from being a good parent. Yes when you leave you will start out with nothing but those things can be so easily replaced!! Your peace of mind, your self-esteem and your kid’s well-being is what YOU will have still and that is way more important than anything else. I beg you, as someone whose parents stayed together “for the kids” and ended up making us live in a dysfunctional household our entire lives, please don’t stay for the kids because it’s not for the kids. All you’re doing is hurting them no matter how you look at it
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I had to leave a Narcissist as well and no, it doesn’t get better. I went to a domestic violence shelter until I could get back on my feet. I’m doing great now.
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I was in a very similar situation when me and my ex separated he had everything pretty much, but I did have a job as a substitute teacher in my kids school and I did have really good friends back in the day. I moved in with some friends and got CDL to become a school bus driver I did a lot in a 3 month period… your kids will be your motivation to get you but in gear. You will have long nights of tears Because you will miss your husband but it will you some much satisfaction on what you can accomplish. Just hold your head up high mama and tell your self you can do this and find a great group of friends that are willing to help you.
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Sorry you’re going through this… where there’s a will, there’s a way. That’s why I always tell my daughter’s to work for what you want so that they’re not dependent of a man. Best of luck. & please do whatever it takes to be happy
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I left my husband after 18 years and 2 kids. I was a stay at home mom and he was the provider. I found a small one bedroom apartment, got a job at the school as an Ed tech and made it work. It wasn’t ideal but it worked. There are programs out there to help you. Hopefully you have some family/friend support. Wish you the best of luck
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I had to do it after almost 10 yrs. With two kids. I was homeless for two years. He was a narcissist but he also cheated and got my best friend pregnant. I did have a part time job tho. I had to get a job or he was gonna kick me out and divorce me. I had my van and that was it. (I thankfully had that because his grand parents bought it for me because they didn’t like me riding my bike at midnight for my job. But since I was homeless the courts sided with him and my kids lived with him and I had visitation and such. (He was smart, and had money because he took it all. All of our tax money and everything). It was horrible but you know what I never ever ever have to hear the words if it wasn’t for me you wouldn’t have that. Because everything I had/have I have earned it myself. (I mean I have a boyfriend of 4yrs now. And that happened 6yrs ago)… I ended up getting a second job which I turned that into a full time job as an ast manager. Then I went off and got another better 2nd part time at a hotel. Then I ended up having manager issues due to manager switch and demoted myself that same day I ended up with a different full time job and got a 3rd shift full time job also. I worked up untill dec 2018 with two full time jobs. Yup 80 hr weeks. And I was pregnant with my 3rd in 2018…ifi. can you can. Just do it. You don’t need your kids around that
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I feel you on this I’m in the same boat except for mine is doing drugs I’ve been saving money with my family giving me positive motivation we can do it we can conquer it is scary. Good luck
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First you go to a divorce lawyer. Just because he owns the house doesn’t mean its not half yours unless you signed a prenump. If he supports you then you’ll get alimony. But you also need to set yourself up. Find out if you can stay with family and hace a bedroom for the kids. If you don’t have family, start putting money away NOW. The lawyer will advise you what your best options are. Your not the first wife that feels like they have nothing to leave their husband. And keep a daily journal of everything he does to you. They will ask you for that and if you can take pics of the stuff he throws out of yours, and of the amount of alcohol he drinks in the trash. Depending on the state, you may not be able to record without his knowledge so pictures are your next best bet. Don’t mention anything to him even if your mad because then he will be able to prepare.
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Left my husband of 16 yrs we have 5 kids I have no family I just left one day I couldn’t take it anymore its been a little over a year and I’m so glad I left find a friend to stay with til u get on ur feet its been a year and I’m buying my own place I work full time u can do this be strong
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My dad was a great dad BUT not a good husband. He wasn’t mean not did he hurt my mom but he wouldn’t give her money & she told him either you give me money every month for bills & to buy the girls things or leave & he left… he tried coming back but my mom direct budge. He had properties & she got the house & 1 big property
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Just know your not doing your kids any good by staying in a mentally unstable home. There is help out there. I did it with two small kids years ago and never regret leaving. I’m not going to tell you it’ll be easy because from experience it won’t but it’ll get easier with time. A happy momma makes for happier kids.
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Wait it out… save money and get a plan… leave and Apply to social services - foodstamps medicaid child support daycare and alimony. Or get a nighttime job so he can be with the kids while u work and thug out ur day sleep with kids. At first Then move out and still apply for help!! Salvation army helps with clothes powerbills toys for xmas u just have to sign up. Church’s can help if u have a wages they can help! Tons of options if u know what to ask for 
I wish u luck!
Also here if u have foodstamps divorces are free
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File for emergency support and legal separation. Half that house and half the money in the bank is yours. I suggest you take what’s yours and go. I was in your shoes and you CAN do it.
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I am going through the same thing right now. I realized I was using the love and support of my kids as a crutch and it’s unfair to them to see their dad always being so mean to me. If you drive, I would strongly recommend instacart. You’re not supposed to bring kids, but no one has to know you’re doing it. I make about $500 a week working three hours a day. A nest egg will really make it easier, at least I feel like I have a few options now. Good luck!
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Wheres her family?? Honestly, just take one step, make one phone call, talk to one person, theres help out there, she just needs to take the first step and reach out to some local resources.
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I’m truly sorry for what you’re going through…
Umm…Check out places like…
Catholic Charity…and…Depending on where you go for help there’s these women centers that have programs where they help you out with living arrangements while getting you some training towards jobs and independence…
The thing is … If the children are hearing arguments or seeing him inebriated and being even a little aggressive.
Well…it’s just not a good look for them…and kids notice more than we realize…and…deserve to be in a healthy happy environment while also seeing Mom happy…
And…I mean look
I am in my 60’s and grew up in a very physical…verbal…toxic family.
My dad worked my Mom also worked at home taking care of seven of us…while also praying he wasn’t gonna stop at local bar on the way home…and just so you know…
I can remember every little detail to this day and now suffer from…PTSD…
And honestly you do not want that for your precious children…
YOU GOT THIS…
GOOD LUCK TO YOU…
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I just left my husband 2 months ago almost 3 now we have 2 kids. Those babies are what is important. The way they are feeling in that situation. And if it’s a bad one, get them out NOW. I’m still numb. I havent gotten depressed or cried much at all. And that’s when I personally know I’m 100% done. There is a ton of help out there, from safe houses to places to help with rent and deposits and all sorts of things.
Trust me the first leap will be the hardest, divorce will suck(going thru it) but I feel a million times better. Stress lifted off my shoulders. It’s nice honestly. Just taking that first step is hard. Leave when he isn’t home.
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Find a local domestic violence program. They can help with possible shelter and resources. Even sitting down and talking to them could help you gauge how to leave, when to leave, and have plans for after you leave.
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Consult with a lawyer in your state and get real legal advise on how to protect you and your kids financial and emotionally. It might be a slow process and WILL be hard. And so very worth it.
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(read to the end) It is hard but it is possible. When my ex husband left me I was a stay at home mom. Everything was in his name and he paid all the bills. When he left, he stopped paying everything. I quickly got whatever job I could that would pay enough to keep the roof over our heads and food in the table. I took a job in a factory doing quality. The work was hard, long hours in a hot factory on your feet…but I worked my way up to supervisor of an entire building. I eventually went back into banking (my original career field but the divorce ruined my credit so I had to build that back up before going back), met an amazing man who I am now married to. We built a life together and I am so grateful to have him. When you file for divorce they will do an immediate hearing for child support, child care, health insurance, maintenance etc…he can’t just stop paying (although mine did and I should have had him charged with contempt but I didn’t want him to lose his job…he pays child support on time now). There are government assistance programs for childcare, food, housing etc….that’s what these programs are for, to help people build their lives back up after falling on hard times. You can do this. It will be hard but it is SOOOOO worth it in the end.
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I just did this same thing. It’s hard but so worth it. I know in the moment it seems impossible but it gets easier.
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Not true, you always have something! There are lots of programs n people em to help. If your married and you become legally separated or have a notarized custody agreement then CYFD can help with daycare cost so you can start working. Start saving whatever you can, start learning how to budget n start downsizing the items you do buy so you can save extra money he won’t know about. Look to your local churches, and unemployment, Human Resources, they all have something they can help you with. Once your separated you can qualify for food stamps or even housing that way you have more money to save n get your own place n get out! Always options! I know it may not seem like their are but they are out there! I hope you have family or friends who can help you through this time!
It may be hard and emotionally draining. You definitely can do it. I was in a toxic relationship for 14 years. Maybe look at resources like Low income housing in your area. Get on a wait list if you have too. Shelters for women and kids. They will help. I’m here to talk if you need.
You got this! Hard af …I was a teen mama and he left me for someone else, now I have my own vehicle apartment 2 part time jobs jobs and in school for nursing! A lot of crying but don’t forget to move forward… life is going to happen either way, and if you stay do you, live for yourself too 
In a divorce you will be entitled to support and half of the value of the home. There are options but don’t let money stand in the way of thinking about the well being of your children. It won’t get better. You can’t make a person change. He has to change because he wants to
You could go to a shelter temporarily to get help and apply for a job later I left mine and best thing I ever did and now I live alone in peace
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Start by getting a job.
It’s not easy, if anything it gets harder after you leave but you need to do what’s best for your kids. I left my physically and mentally abusive ex husband 4 years ago, my kids are still traumatized to this day about how our marriage was and they were young but they do remember more than you think. They’re better off in separate happy houses than one unhappy unstable house.
Since then, my ex husband has had a girlfriend and he treats her the same way. My kids still continue to have to deal with it because obviously I can’t just take them away from their dad. It’s something I struggle with all the time. I removed them from the environment and he continues to be that way and they still get exposed to his unacceptable behavior.
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I know it’s hard. I’ve been there, but you CAN do it. I left my abusive ex about 4 years ago with only what I could fit in a borrowed car. A “good dad” won’t mistreat you, especially in front of your child. I remember making the same excuse that he was a good dad, but in hindsight, I was just used to being treated like crap by men and never being happy. We finally left after he threw my 16 year old out of the house for taking a pack of his new shaving razors. I stayed with family on their couches until I could rent a small home for myself and the kids, I worked my butt, but I allowed friends and family to help me.
I just closed on a 4 bedroom home, have an almost new car, and a small business all of my own. I am happier and more successful than I’ve ever been. My children are happier. YOU CAN MAKE IT WITHOUT HIM!!!
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You leave knowing that staying in a marriage that is toxic or loveless is worse for your kids.
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My mom left when I was a kid, I was about 7. She had to leave us with our dad so she could get herself together and keep us safe. We don’t blame or hate her for it. We would rather see our mom happy than anything else. I hope you leave for your own sake.
Sounds like you have nothing already. Make silent moves and look for a job or some way to rake up some money and don’t tell anyone you’re doing it. Idk what state you’re in but they can help with daycare costs and possibly more. Good luck mama
Having nothing? You will have your Freedom and dignity. that!? Is worth everything. I was you until March 19th, 2021. I’d never look back. I hope you find the courage and strength to face the unknown.
I had 2 small children had been a stay home mom for 6 years and one day I had finally just had enough and decided to leave, I packed whatever I could fit into my vehicle and stayed with family for a little while. For a short period of time we hadto stay in a homeless shelter and and I got put on a waiting list for subsidized housing. It was by far the hardest thing that I’ve ever had to do in my entire life but it was the best decision I could make. There are plenty of resources out there for women who have been in domestic violent situations and for single moms. I stayed in that relationship for years because I felt like I had nowhere else to go and I could never make it without his income, But I was wrong. It has been 6 years since I have been officially divorced and I am still a single mom but I own my own home and vehicle. You just set small goals for yourself and take it one day at a time and you eventually every year you will see your progress.
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Sounds like my daughter & son in law. Hes a horrible narcissist/ gaslighter! She finally divorced him & he still continues, and I see her caving because he’s “not drinking” & being nice yet no counseling and still calling the shots. All he did was show interest in another woman, and NOW he knows another way to control her.
my heart breaks thinking about losing her to him again. I left mine, both of them! A question you have to ask yourself, do you want your children to have relationships like yours?? Cuz its a vicious cycle and what they see in you they will consider normal & healthy! Do you want them weak & dependent on another human? You can’t count on another person for your needs my counselor called it a financial hostage! Do some serious soul searching, its not just you anymore. I grew up with parents who stayed together “for the kids sake”. You aren’t doing them any favors, my idea of normal relationships was not normal. Best of luck to you!
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I planned to leave my narcissist for 6 months. Not sure what kind of access you have to bank account? I planned my escape around my tax refund. I knew it was the only time I’d have the money. I was lucky,I had family I could go to until I got on my feet. I left while he was at work to avoid confrontation. I packed for a week right in front of him and said I was going through clothes for goodwill. I filed a restraining order, child support, TANF,the first week gone. I got childcare through the welfare and got a job two months later and kept the childcare subsidy. I applied for housing through my cities housing program and after a year got it. It’s not easy but it can be done. My advice is toe find someplace to stay first…friends/ family,shelter. Then make the move and apply for help. It will be the best thing you ever did for you and your children.
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I waited till she was 10 th grade I was miserable but never let her see that
After leaving I felt like I had wasted so much of my life being miserable and for me wished I had left so much earlier but felt I didn’t have a out he made all the money and all my family was in another state
First off, ask yourself if you are modeling the type of marriage you want your child to some day have? If the answer is no, start working toward getting out!
Go speak to a battered women’s shelter. You aren’t physically battered, but you are emotionally. You are seeking advise, not shelter.
Then go speak to the welfare office. Find out about transitional housing, aid, etc.
Start squirreling away any money you can. My mom was able to save $20,000 in six months so she could give my dad the ultimatum of stop drinking or get out.
You find a domestic violence shelter with your children and you go. They’re there to help support you. From there you will build your own Epire. Something to call your own. You don’t NEED him or his house, but your children need you and your happiness.
I got the same problem. Been married 37 years. The drinking gets worse everyday I’m at the point of no return.
I told him I was leaving.
All he had to say was: Well do what you gotta do to get happy THIS IS AFTER 37 YEARS.
First step is to make a resume and look into child care. Saying I can’t is accepting defeat. You can and will if that’s what you need. Good luck
Find a shelter or some kind of women’s advocate group in your area. I left with nothing too. Luckily I had family me and my newborn could stay with. Do some research and find all the resources you’ll need that your area offers. It will be tough but so worth it in the end.
He doesn’t own The house. You have a legal right to at least 50% of it maybe 60 if you have more custody of the children
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You can do this get a plan stick with it. There is help out there You can get help with child care He can not take the house you have kids Get the help you need it is there
I hate this feeling that you’re feeling that feeling like you push back against the wall like it’s nothing left or life will so much harder than currently but that’s farthest from the truth. If you have faith in yourself you leave him and trust in yourself that no matter what you are great a better great now that you believe in yourself you’ll get something unless you violated the marriage get you a lawyer if you have to look around find the best affordable lawyer and go get a job take care of you and get child care services for your kids if they are that small and do yourself and your kids a great thing and believe in yourself love yourself hell love them kids enough not to take abuse Infront of them or ever at all I hope this help
He maybe a great father in your eyes but what he is doing is showing this kids the wrong way to treat their mother and a woman and if you have a son he could possibly treat his girlfriends or wife this way. Get out for yourself please
It’s Never going to look any different. Alcoholism is a fatal disease.
Get yourself in Alanon.
They drink because they like it.
They 
know what it’s doing to you and the kids…and they do it anyway and always will.
Hard decision…but somebody has to put the kids first
As soon as you leave, apply for TANF. this is how you get IMMEDIATE FREE CHILD CARE! it’s free for a year, then you get a co-pay.
You can seek help from domestic violence shelters also.
It’s a very very very tough road but when you’re ready you can do it.
Get out of that marriage! do it for yourself and your children! It is not good for them to see him putting you through that because he’s also putting them through it!
I would look into work from home jobs and stack money while you can.
Take off and file for divorce the second you leave. Half of everything he acquired during the marriage is yours unless you signed a prenup. So get creative mama-hell get on Facebook and find another mom or mom group that helps each other with child care so you can work. Best of luck.
If they are available, you NEED family and friends who have your back. I know some people don’t have anyone, so it’s not always possible. But do not be afraid to ask for help in any way.
I’m sorry you’re going through that. There are usually resources out there depending on where you live. Start looking for them. There are some women shelters, or even some places that help women get out of abusive relationships. He doesn’t have to be physically abusing you for it to be abuse. Please get out before it gets worse. Hugs to you mama. Hang in there.
If I was you. Go to a good family member you can trust and see if you can stay with them why you get on your feet. And get your self a job. If you aren’t happen your kids see it and they won’t be happy either
I have four kids (under the age of 8.) and I’m 26. I just left my marriage cause of the same reasons. Use the states help to your advantage. As a family or friend to temporarily move in until you get approved for rental assistance. You get out of there girl. It’ll be hard, but so worth your happiness
You save money slowly move your things out and leave knowing your children will be better in two separate happy homes with a happy mother then seeing a dead unhappy marriage where their mother is unhappy and mistreated
I left my marriage, 2 kids stay at home mom etc. I never worked. My last job was in high school for a month. There are so many resources. And if you go to court then you’ll probably get child support and depending on your state and length of marriage you can get alimony to help you get on your feet.
All I can say momma is it is possible. Make a plan. Get a job, arrange for child care, look for a rental and make the move. Try not to depend on child support. Make the move. God will provide 
I was in an abusive relationship for 12 years, yes it difficult but not impossible. I have no family ir help, so I had to plan it out and get a job first.
There are plenty of resources now but not when I needed it. However, you have to be strong for your kids and do what you can to leave. If you don’t, your kids will think that’s a lifestyle they need to live in as well. Also, when you do find the strength to leave, never bad mouth their father. They will grow up to make their own decisions of him by his own faults. As for the house, you all are married and even if he owns it, that property is BOTH of yours.
Apply for title 20 with your state for child care and get a job to support you and the kids. Save up the money and get your own place. In the meantime, I would suggest staying with a friend or in a woman’s shelter until you get on your feet.
Talk to a lawyer and keep proof (if you can someway without it being obvious) of his abuse and alcoholism, even it’s just screen shots of his messages.
DONT WORRY ABOUT MONEY!! hun this is America and it will be okay I promise!
You need to make a plan and leave while he’s gone. File for separation and start the process. He will not get everything and the state will help with child care!! If he lays a hand on you call the cops right then. You can do this it’s seems impossible right now but please just make the leap and that will give you momentum to get everything done!!
i believe every female have a backup, or knowledge when it comes to finance, fixing things, especially cars, dont let a man hold you back cuz he wants you to be dependent on him for this very reason
Are the kids in school? Get a day job during school hours. If not call your local job and family services and ask for help with daycare so you can work. Ask your parents or siblings for help.
It’s crazy how many people are going through the same thing,
I was wondering the same question and reading through answers they are all the same, “leave as fast as you can”. But it’s really not as easy to me like that 
Everything he bought during your marriage goes half’s when you divorce and if you get the kids child support goes to you just letting you know also if he is hits mistreats you get prove videos pictures all that would help you
Plan appropriately. If he’s a good dad then this is between u and him you’re kids may suffer if u don’t put your ducks in a row before u leave him