How do you mommas handle being touched out?

Day 8 trapped like a rat with a 2 year that has the runs. Lord here our prayers she even slept in bed with us last night n had to be clung to me all night. ( she also gets bad Separation anxiety that’s enhanced when we’re home alone to much ) We tried the hand off to dad bit when he’s been home and her awake anything over 15-20min is a huge meltdown especially when she knows I’m home and just in the other room n it ends bad. I can’t eat , sleep , or shower alone n I’m waiting on my back ordered battery to get here for the family vehicle so I can at least leave the house for a bit. I’m trying to get my nails done n some grocery shopping done thurs or fri before more snow heads in and he’s gone another 72 hours and I’ll be dealing with clients non stop again


Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. How do you mommas handle being touched out? - Mamas Uncut

Honestly my oldest was like this. He is 8 now. Just go for walks down your street or hang out outdoors anywhere and let them go crazy. We have inside and outside voices in my house now. When he was 2 and 3 the absolute worst. I have 3 kids and none of them have matched his attitude at that age. Find something they like/love and tire them out. They are still figuring out communication and feelings also how to deal with them. All you can do is push them in the right direction and make them feel understood.

Teach them boundaries! Start them young. They’ll do what they’re allowed to get away with. Consistency is key. Though… don’t give in


this stage won’t last long, you are her happy place.
you will get me time again for now embrace it it goes by very fast.


So try hr breaks where you place child in area and make sure they are safe and all I put my 1 yr old in pack in play put background noice and or tv show she watches and for 15 to 30 mins I shower eat lay down go through stuff clean. That is my hr. When dad is home he watches kids for hr or so so I can do the same that an hr.5 to 2 hrs a day for myself may not be much but it helps build her independence and eventually separation is not much of a struggle.

6 kids in and sometimes if they are fine fed changed whatever that 10 min meltdown just step away the baby is with dad crying step away it is ok to take a moment for self. I always walk into baby playing away with dad forgetting I was ever out of the room.


Try fidget spinners or those bubble popper things or stress balls so he has something to keep his hands occupied. Have a pillow or teddy bear made from an old T shirt or other item of your unwashed clothing he can carry around.

I say it. Nicely, reassuringly… but… I just explain EVERYONE NEEDS personal space… love you the same as always… and then get my space… and be MORE loving, when I return… stating AH… I feel better… etc, etc… going overboard with it all… and do it often and regularly… my eldest was like that…

This is what i did with one of my clients. Took sometime, but worked. Also never leave without telling her you live her and will be right back. I would tell her im going to walk outside in front of house. Tell her youre leaving her inside with daddy and have her see you out the window. This is the moment where dad will have to be patient. She will have a melt down, have him point to you and talk to her in a calming voice to help soothe her. Walk back and forth about 2 times (increase slowly, then add houses). Then come in praise her to staying with daddy even if shes upset and comfort her.
She needs to see that when you leave youre coming back and shes safe. Then take her outside as a reward. She will eventually put that when you go for a walk when u come back she will have a short walk. Its all about validating her feelings and showing her how to regulate them.
Then do this is the house, tell her you will be right back. Walk around corner for a moment and return. Do this every chance you get.


One, you definitely deserve a break, but my oldest son was this way. Thing is sometimes it’s not JUST separation anxiety. My son is 12 now and has generalized anxiety. So before you just “set boundaries” understand if that is the situation “boundaries” will not always help. Consistency definitely helps, but a 2 year old with anxiety will NOT just understand EVEN with time AND consistency. Sorry. I seen that the hard way. I listened to others and enrolled mine into a day school… (at 2 years old) just 8:30-1:30 2 days a week. I explained to them from the start his situation and if it was beyond consoling with in 30 minutes they needed to call me. Couple of months in- I picked him up with raw checks and they allowed my child to stand in a window all day while crying and vomiting. He didn’t go back AND it made it even worse. If I went behind the car to get him or his baby brother out of the vehicle he would cry/vomit. I had to walk in front of the car. Also, keep in mind that 2 year olds aren’t great at communicating yet… you have NO idea if they are having bad dreams or anything else. Everyone told me I had to force it “set boundaries/routines” ect… and it would get better. No it ABSOLUTELY didn’t. My mom or my sister babysat him while I worked. I am NOT joking when I say even as an INFANT anything more than 15 minutes in a car seat & he done the same… he did… he has always had anxiety. Terribly and it was heartbreaking for HIM and hard at times for me, bc I was the ONLY person that could calm him. School was HARD not only cried everyday, but sometimes it was so bad he’d vomit, or mess his pants. Thankfully, he took up with our school officer that managed to get him to class every morning. We are talking k-2nd. He also seen the school therapist, and yes it was labeled separation anxiety for the longest, but I new better… he has seen therapist outside of school and now takes medication for it and he is so much better than he was. I wouldn’t allow meds until this year, bc I wanted him to be able to properly communicate and be aware of any changes for the worst (them type of meds can do that, if it’s the wrong type) anyway, for my own sanity, I stayed up an hour or so after he was in bed. It was hard. My ex husband made it worse by saying it was pathetic that he had to be so far up my a**, ect. YES, for the longest he sat in the floor at the door while I showered, he sat at my feet while getting ready, cooking, cleaning and even at ages 5 & 6 I would leave the door open to shower or whatever. It is hard, but be thankful that you have the ability to calm your child. I recommend talking to the pediatrician. Yes strict routine does help, but it doesn’t just make it go away. My son for the longest had nightmares about being stuck in a tree and a pig trying to eat him (from Toy Story)… May seem small, but for his age… the fear was extremely weird. I know he had and STILL struggles with major changes…
I am NOT saying this is what is going on with your child. I am saying it’s possible, but so is just separation anxiety or anything really. Talk to the pediatrician and try to pay attention to when it’s the worst or go back to when you think it became worse & mention it. :four_leaf_clover: :pray: :pray: for you and the child :heartpulse:


I have an 8 year old clinger. I’ve been telling her for years that Mommy needs a minute. Luckily she’s the youngest of 4 and I had already trained the other 3 that when Mom using the bathroom, she need to be left alone. I established my own bathtime that they understand is me time. I usually try to do this after I’ve put them to bed, but sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do.

My now 10 year old was a little clingy but not horrible then around 8 he decided he wanted his own room. We set his room up let him pick out and decorate it and he was sleeping in it and doing great. Fast forward to Jan 2020 my kidneys almost shut down and I spent 10 days in the hospital and he wasn’t allowed to visit. Then go to Dec 2020 and I had covid and we were separated for 14 days he could see me but couldn’t get near me. Then Feb 2021 I took a horrible stomach bug and wouldn’t go in with him for 3 days and it’s like something changed in him. Now he refuses to sleep in his room he sleeps basically under me. He knows he can’t go to work with me but he keeps up when I go to lunch and will call me then he calls me at 330 on the dot when I’m clocking out. We home school and always have so he is never around children his own are very much and sometimes I wonder if that’s part of the separation anxiety since I’m his safe place.

sorry you are going thru this, but it there not a yard outside your door? Park down the street? Sidewalks outside? If so , take your 2 yr old outside, even if it’s cold, even if there is snow outside. Put a coat on her & bring her outside, You only seem worried about a battery to go out, You will be surprised how nicely a little one sleeps when outside for a bit, Warm or cold, it will do wonders for both of you


Maman if dad is home and able go for a walk or take a bath lock the door and put some music on yes it sucks yes you feel awful but o also know the consequences of being touched out for too long and that is so much worst on both of you… the more you’re touched out the more they are in your bubble I have 3 kids and they all overly cuddly I feel you!

I’m at stay at home mom we have 5 kids ages 11 10 5 6 and 3 and some times I go a week b4 leaving the house for anything I also can’t do anything alone and I feel like if I have to be touched one more time I’ll scream if it wasn’t for my bubble bath after hubby gets home I might of lost my shit years ago

The Invisible String Check out this book and start reading it to her every day. I would also pray with her daily asking God to take her worry and give her peace and keep you both safe .

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Umm if she has the runs I’m assuming you mean she’s sick and if sick of course she wants her mama and she’s still a baby soooo idk. I get that it’s hard but she won’t need you forever I swear.


What about having daddy take her somewhere. Get her excited about it. Time to move from peek a boo. To hide and seek. Make it fun. Hide easy to find places making it harder each time. Also have child hide in room you are picking up in . As you pick up say where you are and she’s not there . Use a timer have her sit on a chair or couch till it goes off. With a toy while you hide . Longer times , harder places to hide. Play every day. Get daddy in on it. When you need some time . You go hide have daddy help her look everywhere but where you are.


Stop fighting it and embrace it, you are her whole world and you are pushing her away :sob::sob: she needs you. I have had these days too but I don’t ever want my kids to feel unwanted by me, if it’s this hard for you think of how hard it is for her. Give her a pedicure and let her give you one, it may not be perfect but maybe it will be enough of a distraction to give her something to do.


Have u tried letting her be the one to leave you? I know it’s totally different for my daughter when she leaves me to go on a visit with my Mom or my Aunt. Who are the only people she will even think about leaving me for. But sometimes, it easier when they are the ones going bye-bye!

Leave that child till she hyperventilate. She’ll get over it. Gotta let em have the melt downs.


Sick kid is Way more important than hair and nails. Hell…i haven’t had my hair and nails done at a salon since high school. Lol. As for this norm of moms saying need breaks…i get that but you also knew ,when had kids,that you would be with them 24/7…7 days a week. There are no mandatory breaks. Sneak a Snickers while sitting on steps outside for 5 minutes of quiet is about the best you get if dont hire a babysitter or have a friend/relative that can watch the kids. Other than that…they go with you everywhere and are up your booty 24/7 until get into school. Only time you will have regular breaks. Im happy to be able to get a shower and do my own hair and nails. Dyed and highlighted my own hair and put on makeup last month after feeling frumpy and unattractive and boosted my own confidence. Did my own photo shoot and think i looked awesome. Made me realize how pretty i really am under all the baggy mom clothes and regular ponytail.

This too shall pass…:heart: It’s what a mom does.

This is going to sound crazy but here goes- did you play peekaboo when she was a baby. This starts teaching that you will always come back. If your baby is clean, fed, and in a safe place- turn music on and do things around house but come back to acknowledge her. Start of small work your way up.