Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. How to tell my ex about my new relationship? - Mamas Uncut
When you are in the relationship
When you feel the relationship is going somewhere permanently
I donât think you need to tell him, itâs not his business.
Unless itâs getting serious, I wouldnât bring it up. Depends how long youâve been seeing the other person.
I suggest 6 months in to the relationship.
Itâs not his business unless you are serious. Then he has every right to know who is around his kids.
When you decide itâs time to meet the children
My ex and I told eachother who we were talking to, seeing, etc. It wasnât weird to say, âIâm going on this dateâ, or âIâm talking to this guyâ. He did the same. 
There wasnât anything to hide, and we have a son together. We both started talking to people months after we split.
You do not owe him any explanation of your new private life. Stay private.
Before he meets the kids.
None of his business
Donât. Keep the kids out of it too until itâs a very serious relationship and then tell your ex. no overnights w the bf and kids either.
Before you introduce this person to your children , since you and the ex co-parent .
Why did yâall get a divorce just to not see others? Once divorced you move on right?
None of his business
I donât think Iâd tell him until you know itâs going towards a serious relationship⌠And unless youâre ready for the kids to meet this new guyâŚ
Not his business unless u plan on getting married to the new guy.
Iâve been seeing someone, itâs starting to get serious. I thought you should hear it from me first. But nothing is going to change with you, me, and the kids and our co parenting.
Wait until you know itâs going somewhere. Also wait for that point to introduce them to your child.
I would let him know but also let him know that untill itâs serious you wonât be involving the kids. As you are divorced I imagine they would be his main concern.
You donât need to tell him anything unless itâs a permanent thing. And same with your children if their little.
How come its his business?
My ex didnât tell.me he was seeing anyone until he got her permission to give me her address since he was moving in with her.
We had lawyers in the past say if something is serious they are supposed to introduce the new partner before putting the child in but unfortunate till this day I still have actually met her. If seen her in the car but never spoken to her or met her. My son hates her
IMO the kids shouldnât meet him for AT LEAST 3 months after you have established it is a relationship. Depending on your relationship with your ex I feel as if you could tell him BEFORE the kids meet him. Just ask yourself how you would want him to treat a new relationship with you and the kids.
Dont say anything until it is solid.
When would you want to know about âhis girlfriend/relationshipâ? Thats when you should tell/introduce.
Why do feel the need to explain
Why do you explain yourself to your exhusband? What if he says youâre not allowed? Are you divorced or in seperate states?
Why should you⌠nothing to do with ex husband. Have fun, enjoy and see what happens.
Tell him before new dude meets the kiddos!! Cuz they will tell your Ex EVERYTHING!! Mommy wears lipstick. I saw mommy kiss him like she used to kiss you. I had to pee @ 4 a.m & he was grinning from ear to ear & he was tiptoeing thru the kitchen holding his shoes, with his shirt untucked & mommy was standing at her bedroom door w a dreamy look on her face& in her nice robe. He always stays the night on the âsofaâ. Mommy says heâs in much better financial situation than you are. He always takes us to fancy restaurants & he lets us pretend drive while we wait for the valet. I get to give the waitress a $50 after dessert!! I have the valet $20 & he jumped up & clicked his heels⌠etc.
I would personally wait till itâs serious enough to even call it a relationship, but really I say tell him when your comfortable and ready. Cause you deserve to be happy
Personally, when youâre ready to introduce this man to your children. I see comments like⌠why is it his business⌠itâs not his business UNTIL youâre going to have the new man around the kids. Theyâre his kids too and out of respect, he should know another man will be around them. Surely if/when your ex husband starts to date youâll want to know if another woman is going to be around your children. Itâs courtesy.
Not his business. You donât have to tell him especially if you arenât even sure anything is going to develop.
If itâs serious, tell him before the kids meet the new guy.
I personally wouldnât mention any of it to him, UNTIL; itâs about to involve the children.
I personally feel once the kids become involved is when it partially becomes his business(to do with the kids part only).
Not his business u do u momma. Just leave kids outta it until you now for sure ur going to be with him. Ex husband doesnât need to know anything u do just about kids thatâs it
You DO NOT have to mention an effing thing about your personal life to your EX-HUSBAND/ donât ever forget that is NONE OF HIS BUSINESS 
You dont need to tell him. His your ex, why do you care if he knows that you are seeing someone new? Just let find out on his own that you are seeing someone. Or do you want your ex to cause drama with you and your new guy? Just leave ur ex in the dark. He has no hold or control on you or your life.
I think it would be worth mentioning since you have small children together. Donât mention it until you plan on bringing them around your kids.
Its your privet life why does he need to know
1: none of his businessâŚ
2: why would you want to make it his business when it is nothing yet, want to make him jealous and want you backâŚ
3: he hasnât asked you out on a date, and may not ever, and your already talking a possible relationshipâŚ
There isnât even a relationship to be telling him about. Even if there does become one, he doesnât need to know unless itâs been 6 to 12 months down the line and youâre ready to introduce your kids to the guy. He does have a right to know and meet who is going to be around his children. But right now? Absolutely not. Youâve only been talking to the guy. All youâre going to do was create a potential problem for yourself
Before your children meet him
You donât need his consent. I would mention before he meets the kids if that is what you guys decided when you divorced
Who cares what the ex thinks?!?
Are you ready to move on if your second guessing yourself it mustâve been more traumatic then you realise .But so saying he doesnât need to be sensitive if your divorce was mutually agreed upon so itâs a question of where you think your at in this stage not your ex luvey.good luck your journey is still ahead of you but be safe you and your babies âŚ
If he isnât meeting your children yet, it isnât any of your exâs business. Also, how do you know for sure he hasnât been dating?
Why does he need to know? Do You need his permission!!!
Itâs none of his business
First you donât involved the children until at least 6 months in AND itâs extremely serious. Right before you introduce the kids, you tell the ex that youâre introducing the kids. That all you owe him. If I had a great relationship with my ex (I donât) Iâd go about introducing the ex and the new guy bc the new guy will be around the kids.
When would you want him to tell you? What are both of your expectations when it comes to the new gf/bf being around kids? What are the doâs and donât for the new partner?.. Co-parenting is hard and emotional. Set the precedent that you want that kind of relationship (since your the first to date) and respect him the way you would want him to do you. When you talk to him about it try to not bring up any relationship issues and stick to the âparenting planâ. God willing he will me emotionally ready to try and have this type of relationship with you⌠If it becomes a big thing and he canât then just start dating and deal with his crap as he throws it⌠You seem like your ready to move on with your life so i say go for it either way he goes. You deserve to be happy
Do you and ex have a plan in your MSA for âsignificant othersâ? Personally, with children, of any age, especially younger, wait until they are actually âsignificantâ before introducing to the kids â> and you donât need your exâs permission.
Itâs none of his business, but if youâre doing it out of courtesy then I would suggest you donât mention it till you and said new lover are getting more serious and they are going to meet the children.
Until youâre serious enough for new guy to meet the kids, hopefully months from now, itâs not your exâs business
he donât need to know
You donât ow him anything none of his business
Why did you divorced him from first place since you still care about him. Donât start any relationship until you ready to move on
Itâs not really his business if you are seeing someone. With that being said wait until the kids meet the bf and then casually mention âhey,Iâve been seeing So and So for x amount of months now. The kids are meeting him for the first time on x day.â Thats really all he needs to know. Because letâs face it, he probably hasnât told you about all his relationships he has had.
Itâs none of his business, girl.
When you decide to let your new man meet the kids then Iâm sure thatâs when youâll probably want to tell him.
None of his business
Depends on yâallâs friendship
Bernabe Salazar can you weigh in on your opinion?
Itâs not any of his business if he is your Ex.
If you have basic respect for each other and expect the same in return then you should inform him when things actually get serious.
When you feel the relationship has become serious, with kids involved he definitely has a right to know as this other person is becoming involved in your childrenâs lives and therefore involved in his life as he will be co parenting with you both. But ultimately itâs when you feel comfortable.
you dont need to tell him unless it gets serious and long term. also dont bring this new guy around your kids for at least a few months. just to see if it will be a long good relationship
I can see why most of you are divorced. Itâs a respect factor if you co-parent. You are teaching your kids you can still be friends after a divorce. Telling your ex about a new relationship when little kids are involved is a way to keep communication open and continue to develop that relationship, especially if you co-parent. Feel the water; once youâve gone a couple dates with him, youâll decide whether or not you see a future with him. If you see a future with him and it turns out to be exclusive, then tell your ex; hey I met someone and I want you and the kids to meet him, etc. Good luck with your new adventure.
When you have said person around your children it would be courteous to give your ex a heads up. Until then it is not his business
Man, a lot of these women are petty. I would say something to him, before your new one meets your kids. Just let your ex know that youâve been seeing someone a while and think itâs time for him to meet your kids. 
Donât make a bigger deal than what it is, but I applaud you for being an adult about it.
If these womenâs exâs had a new girlfriend, theyâd all raise a fuss.
When youâre ready to get the kids involved
None of his business.
They say to wait about a year to introduce your children to a new person you share a relationship with⌠Iâd say talk to him before that happens⌠about a year
I would tell him in private and not in front of the kids. He does have a right to know because his kids are involved. However, there is nothing wrong with you having a relationship with someone else. As long as your kids are safe and happy. I wish you all the best for your future
I wouldnât tell him but I found out that my ex was married through Facebook and now sheâs mean to my kids soâŚ
Iâd talk to him when things get serious enough that youâre wanting your new guy to meet your kids.
Not unless itâs serious and you later on down the line want him around your kids
Lmao. Some of these questions on here oh God.
Your worried about something g that ainât even official yet.
He is no longer a part of your life he might be a part of the childrenâs lives but not yours you donât owe him any explanation nor should you share it with him the only thing you should do is coparent and discuss the children
Why have you both not moved on?
Whatever. Look if you are actually done, then you donât need to tell him till the man is around your kids. If he sees other women and is any sort of man he should(canât say whether he will but should) do the same.
The simplest advice to anyone separating but with children. Mind your business, unless what he is doing effects the kids, and expect the same from him. Hope that helps
At what point would you want him to tell you about his relationship? Thatâs your answer.
Although I donât think itâs any of his business until youâre getting ready to introduce the kids to him.
I wouldnât tell him until you know itâs a sure thing.
Literally non of hes business
Itâs none of Your Exes business ,Why do you feel the need to worry about this ? if you like some one and Iâm sure If you trust the person around your kids Thatâs all that matters , Do you need to give him approval for anyone heâs been with since You ? Been on both Ends of this situation and My advise is You need to be happy too đ¤Ś
Many people here do not understand why one should tell their ex-husband about a new relationship. Itâs hard to explain the exact meaning of this gesture 
, but when people have that kind of courtesy for one another itâs a different kind of people and relationships. Not everyone will understand it. As far as when, whenever you feel itâs the right time. 
Y. U. Explain. N. Anything. To. Him
Heâs your ex⌠just straight tell him if you want him to know 
Iâd start by just letting him know you have someone in your life thatâs important to you and let him know itâs a heads up 
Iâm friends with my ex after working hard to get through out toxic time frame and this means the world.
Good for you trying to be respectful and adult about this!!
Right before you introduce the new person to the childrenâŚ
Make checks with you and your new guys picture on it. Send him 2 cents. Kidding.
Itâs not his business. Thatâs part of getting a divorce.
People are commenting that it isnât his business it actually is. It becomes his business when you bring the guy around your children. Other than that definitely have fun and see what happens. But I think that whenever you feel itâs right, let him know. Me as a parent, I would want to meet my exes girlfriend but only if he was going to bring her around my child so I knew whoâs around my children and I would do the same for him. I think once you know itâs going to get official or more serious definitely tell him! Hope it works out for you & I wish happiness in your new relationship 
The only concern he should have is if this new guy is somebody good to have around his kids. If you can assure him of that then there shouldnât be any problems but you need to be real careful about who you introduce into your kids lives.
Dont! Let him find out by himself 
Everyone out here asking why itâs his business⌠they have kids together. Itâs his business who is around them. Period.
âIâm talking to someone âknewâ and it may possibly lead to a âknewâ relationship.â Whatâs the problem?
Just go talk to him and tell him.
None of his business
Just remember to protect your children first and utmost it is a different world out there and we donât know who is who right away. Be very careful.