How was your second birth if your first was traumatic?

Please post anonymously. My husband and I are thinking about having another baby. However, with my first, I had a very traumatic experience where I almost died. The providers have all said that if I chose to have another, it would be unlikely for another traumatic experience like that to happen as it was an extremely rare occurrence. They also said the delivery would be a scheduled c-section. I’m just curious if other mommas have had traumatic experiences and went on to have another baby? What were the experience like being pregnant and delivering?


Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. How was your second birth if your first was traumatic?

My first was terrible i almost bled to death. I have had 2 more and they were smooth sailing. Super easy labor and delivery. My were vaginally births tho if that makes a difference

My 1st was a tough labor and delivery. Emergency c section, lost his heartbeat, 8 days in the hospital due to both of us on antibiotics. This was 1987. I was 21.
10 years later, my 2nd birth was an absolute breeze. Easy labor and regular delivery, went home in 36 hours from the birth. This is 1997. I was 31.
Every birth is different and every mother is as well.
Just because you had a rough go with your 1st doesn’t mean the 2nd one will be the same, unless you have an underlying issue that may cause a difficult pregnancy/ birth.
Talk with your doctor and your husband, then make the best decision for yourself

My 1st was awful. I should of had a c-section but it was to later. Had over 175 stitches below. Alot more to it. Anyways my 2nd and 3 was not bad. Every one got better for me.

My first was a emergency c-section because both our heart rates dropped. I was in labor for 48 hours. My other 3 were all okay. I delivered them natural.

my first was a 3 day nightmare second 12 hours start to finish cake walk after the first one tbh

My first was easy. My 2nd one was traumatic my son was coming down hand first which resulted in an emergency c-section. My 3rd was a breeze with a plan c-section.

My first was so scary, I lost a lot of blood and my son was born not breathing and no pulse. With my second I ended up being extra cautious with her and had no problems, my third I was induced with no issues. I would just explain to your doc what your fear is and go from there!

I tapped “like” in error

My first was traumatic and I almost died. I had two more and they were good. I have had 3 total c sections

My first pregnancy i developed rapid on set pre eclampsia and a had a traumatic delivery of my son, i was having pre eclamptic fits and my placenta was starting to tear so had to have an emergency section 11 days early and weighing 5lb14 and had to stay in for 4 days. It was very scary and they told me any future pregnancies would be high risk. 6 years later, i fell pregnant again, no complications except gestational diabetes. She come out 8 days early, weighing 9lb5 and there was no complications during the labour either. I was home the next day.

My son was in the bend on the placenta. They told me to abort him as he would be handicap. I delivered him in an ambulance on way to hospital he was 3 lbs 12 ozs. Many months in NICU he finally came home. My doctor told me not to have any more. Three months later I was pregnant again. Then had another 2 after that. I have five births , 5 wonderful adult sons. But everyone is different so check into it and think about it before you decide. Good luck on what ever you choose

Shantail Royal-Rosario …you should tell your story

Every birth is different but as you mentioned your health care provider says a schedule C section is likely which isn’t too bad better safe than risk

My first was slow pain overnight nurse had to clip water 2nd was so quickly water was leaking nurse had to clip. In plenty cases gynocologis would advise if there is a complication as you says they would schedule CSection it means they knows best. There is many different cases. High risk cases like high blood pressure, baby breach, baby is big, low blood count, overdue, etc requires c section. C section isn’t bad. My daughter had 2.

My first I had high bloody pressure threw out that turned into seve preclampsia my child stopped growing couple weeks before the end of my pregnancy the I made it to 38weeks and I was admitted to hospital monitored but my blood pressure wouldnt stabilize and the headache I got from it was hell then rushed for a emergency c section at midnight and my baby was sent straight to NICU she was 4lbs 10 she only got a quick look at her and she was gone out the room they continued to close etc sent me upstairs to the ICU as my blood pressure wouldnt come down at all
Then by 11am the next day while I had visitors in the room I hemorrhage and bleed out all over the bed and passed out I ended up with blood transfusions poked with needles in every part of my body is was a hell of a pregnancy I was advised to not have anymore kids but 6 months after that I fell pregnant again and I did the pregnancy right to the end with no scans but 1 and no stress no hassle from no1 and I had a pretty good pregnancy and I got my boy he was 5lbs 10 I also had tubes tied after him 2 but over all was worth it have 2 healthy toddlers now 3yrs old my girl and my son just turned 2 :slight_smile:

My bestie had 3. She is not allowed to have babies anymore. Now her case was not common of course but each baby got worse. First one was an emergency c section because of something with her. The second was the baby and her. The third the doctor said not attempting natural. Midwives tried to convince her to go natural. Baby was measured bigger than she should have been at last ultrasound (normally not an issue) but midwife said she would keep the date and if she goes into labour just come in. Well she did go into labour and baby burst out of c section scar. Almost killing both of them. My friend spent a year having surgeries to fix her destroyed bladder and had a catheter most of that time. So stick with your gut and intuition.
Again very aware this is not the normal but I believe warnings and worst case scenarios etc. should be known

Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. How was your second birth if your first was traumatic?

So with my first child we both almost died. Had an emergency c section and we were in the hospital for 7 days and then I had to have wound care because my c section ruptured. My second birth was another c section but it was night and day. And my recovery was so much better.

I had to have an emergency section after 70 hours of labour with my first, both me and my son almost died and needed resuscitation. I went on to have my 2nd son naturally

Each is different don’t afraid of one bc of what happened in another you’ll miss the magic

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Each is very different my first was very bad had a emergency c section my bp was super high and my daughters heart rate was decreasing, She is now 17 and my second daughter 10 years later pregnancy was alot better even had her naturally third daughter had gestational diabetes overall was good also had her naturally. Now my girls are 17,7,6.

I needed a c- section with my first. Had a repeat c- section with my second. Trying naturally wasn’t even offered. With my third, a different doctor than the second one, I was allowed to try natural and didn’t need a C-section. She came fast and easy. I believe my second one would have, too, if I had been given that choice. Each pregnancy and delivery is different. Talk with your doctor more about it.

I had toxemia with my oldest. It was horrible. ICU for a week after birth, both of us came close to death. My second was a piece of cake. Not one single issue.

My first was perfect, now my second was just plain truamanic experience. But it’s different for everyone.

The best thing for u to do is talk to your doctor about your plans to get pregnant again and your concerns about your first experience delivering.if your child is still young give yourself time to over come what you went thru. Goodnluck my dear

Second was a scheduled c section and a breeze

First birth traumatic, but second birth completely opposite. Had a great second pregnancy and birth.

Each of mine were very different.

I had 7 births , one was super traumatic it was number 5 I almost died , had 2 after and was fine , each one is different

Yes I had the same first time my baby heart stopped and my second was a horrendous pregnancy again and she too had a very traumatic emergency birth, listen to the professionals,

First two, at 19 & 21 zero problems. My third… I gave birth, emergency c section at 31 weeks. But I was in abusive situation and stress was at an extreme, I was 28. Now at 38, miracle baby decided to find his way into our lives. I had to get my cervix stitched closed at 18 weeks, they believe my cervix is less competent because of my last pregnancy. Lil over a month post op and he’s doing great so far :blue_heart: praying we make it to full term. Every pregnancy for everyone is different just have to take it easy when you’re pregnant and put it in god’s hands.

Mine was traumatic. My momma told that nurse she won’t be back and she ain’t ever lied my baby 31 known. Different strokes for different folks.

First birth was traumatic. Had a waterbirth with my 2nd to avoid interventions because thats what made my first so traumatic and it was amazing. No pain meds and also no pain.

I’ve had a few traumatic pregnancies and I won’t go in to detail, but my last one was pretty easy. My OB was patient because she knew what I had been through and every little problem I had she put my mind at ease by letting me come in and either listen to baby or do an US. That made the difference to what could of been another bad experience. I wasn’t her patient for the others before my son and knew he wasn’t going to be patient or what I needed to get through and have a mostly healthy and happy pregnancy.

My deliveries with my boys where completely different. My first was a bad bad experience. 2nd was easy breasy. Nothing like the first.

They almost lost me during the c-section with my first. I felt the c-section, horrible experience. When I had my second, another c-section, no issues during birth

First was a very traumatic birth, almost 30 hours in labour before they decided to do an emergency section. Bled out on the table, needed a load of blood transfusions and spent 16 nights in the hospital. That was 10 years ago. I had my second last July and was hoping for a VBAC, however due to the pandemic I was worried if it stalled like the first time I could be stuck in hospital for ages again so scheduled a section. Best thing ever. It was relaxed, we were chatting and dancing, I have so many photos and video footage of my son being born, they did a ‘gentle’ section so had the screen down, baby straight to me for cuddles, delayed cord clamping and then baby back to my chest while they stitched me up. I was up and about within two days as opposed to my first when I didn’t heal until 18 weeks later. Was wonderful and made me want another straight after! Only scary part was going down to get the epidural…only because I’m a chicken :rofl:

My first one was extremely painful…the epidural didn’t work and since it was my first one, I had nothing to compare it to in order to let them know. They even sewed me up without it working and me feeling everything. My second one was a BREEZE!! Epidural worked perfectly and there was no pain. Baby all but flew out! lol. Hugs and best of luck!!

My first was traumatic, my baby almost died but the second one was better… It’s different for some of us but I’d advise that you consult your doctor before trying to get pregnant again

I hAd a traumatic first delivery where I wound up having a last minute CSection! I vowed I wouldn’t have another baby unless they promised I would have a C Section as soon as I went into labor and that’s what was done!!

I had a tramatic first and stopped after that. Every birth is different and all children are miracles and a gift.

Traumatic first, c-section after pushing for 3 hours :sob:
Second was the absolute opposite, called my doctor at 36 weeks bc I was “uncomfortable” they brought me in to make sure all was well, doc checked me and said I was at 9.5cm, nurse literally ran me down the hall to L&D, got my gown and iv, pushed once and out she came, 40 minutes after I got to the hospital!

Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. How was your second birth if your first was traumatic?

I had a very traumatic experience 1st time, almost died too. Was told my 2nd would be high risk & could literally fall out just walking at the grocery store. I have 4 kids, all healthy. My 2nd was not high risk, I carried full term. Now 2nd labor was scary but because the cord wrapped around her throat.

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This might not be the same thing but with my third pregnancy I almost died as well and it was very traumatic my first pregnancy was kind of traumatic but not as bad as my third so when I got surprised pregnant with baby number four I was really scared but I went on to have and actually relatively easy labor and delivery with him but I get being scared about it I really do

I suggest reaching out to a doula for support and information :heart:

Chose an elective with my second. Best thing I everrrrrr did. Recovery and bonding was 10x easier then a traumatic vag birth with ptsd… xx

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I had 2 traumatic deliveries. My first son was an emergency c-section he was to big for me to deliver. My second son My placenta was attached to my uterus and I had a scheduled c-section with him at the children’s hospital in the cities and was there for 25 days. Both babies are healthy and super smart. If my placenta was not attached and I would have been able to have more I definitely would have but due to that I had to have my tubes removed.
If you feel itnis right to have another and God is leading you that way go for it.

With my first I almost died several times but I’m currently pregnant with my second all of going well and my doctor is allowing me to try for a vbac

My first was traumatic and eventually ended up in an emergency c section. Even then, none of the meds would work, I could feel EVERYTHING still. They ended up having to put me to sleep to deliver my baby safely. My second (born in February) was a scheduled c section and went very very smooth! Definitely a night and day difference. I was just as nervous as you are, but it all worked out great!

Currently pregnant with my second, following a traumatic birth and a PTSD diagnosis. We took the time to be ready before getting pregnant, I’ve reconnected with my therapist just incase things get heavy, but so far I have had a happy healthy pregnancy.

I had a traumatic first birth. My placenta was old and calcified and wouldn’t come out and I had to be rushed to surgery for a d&c for it to be scraped out. I had to get blood transfusions because I lost too much blood. Second birth was complication free.

My first was very traumatic. Almost made me not want another baby! I had an emergency c-section and they had thought I was numb enough but when they started cutting on me, I felt it and I was screaming. I tried to rip the blind down and they had to tie my hands down and I think they knocked me out with something because after that I don’t remember anything. I woke up to “here she is”. But the next csection went very smoothly. I’m now a mother of 4, soon to be 5. I will say my 4th was kinda scary too.

1st was long and painful almost 15 hours and hemmoraged had blood transfusions and left with lots of illnesses 2nd was bad for 9 months with hyperemisis and was in labour for 13 minutes 3rd perfect pregnancy apart from sciatica and a double breech baby had c-section and was born 13 minutes later

My first birth was so traumatic. I was terrified for my second. Surprisingly I had the best doctor and she helped calm my fears. Labor and delivery was about the same time frame as the first. But 2 pushes and baby was out with no complications or tears. First time I pushed for an hour, baby wasn’t breathing when he came out, and I tore pretty bad. It was a much easier healing process the second time for me.

I had an emergency c-section with my first with me actually being intimated. Epidural didn’t work and the 2nd went perfect! Planned is much better than rushing for an emergency, things are more organized and ready than spur of the moment

I had a horrible experience with my first , god sepsis and got to the hospital just on time before it ended up killing me , I was so scared to have another , I now have a 3 year old and a 5 month old , had a planned section and it was by far a way better experience ! U still have the anxiety but thankfully all went great and I recovered a lot quicker

My second birth was a DREAM compared to my nightmare first. I had different drs, a different hospital and it restored my faith in the birth process.

Almost lost my son at birth and I hemorrhaged badly and don’t remember 8 hours and now am on 3rd bio after my son and I also have an adopted daughter

My first birth was traumatic. He got stuck -head out- for 40 minutes.
It almost killed us both. He has a paralyzed arm from it. And we think o2 deprivation contributed to autism.
I was told when I had him that that was rare.
It’s not, though.

My youngest was a scheduled C-section. Things with him went just fine.
And honestly I think I healed faster from the C-section because I didn’t have the emotional/mental trauma

My first delivery was a breeze compared to my 2nd. It was literally the worse expirence of my life. It should’ve been a csect. The Dr wouldn’t listen to me at all. Asked my now ex what he thought of me having a c-section. He flat out said no. My 3rd was an emergency csect. He had no choice. If your Dr is willing to do a scheduled csect take them up on it. Besides the emergency parts my csect was my easiest recovery. I would do a csect again if I was going to have more.

Yes happened to me. My first birth was a nightmare & it took me so long to decide to have another child. My second birth was absolutely amazing. I changed doctors & the hospital the second time. A complete 180 the second time around.

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My doctor told me the same, least likely to happen. I had pre Eclampsia, delivery, Had retained placenta. Acetta. I Hemorroaged, passed out. And needed blood transfusions. The same happened 2nd time around, as well as the 3rd. My 3rd was a happy surprise. But through the whole pregnancy, I thought I was going to leave my kids motherless. I was induced for all 3 not sure if that was the cause. I wasn’t going to attempt for a 4th.

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I had a pretty rough first. Had to use forceps and I was also cut. Lost alot of blood pushed entirely to long and then was extremely messed up feeling after. Had my second son 14 months labor and it was the easiest fastest birth ever

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Very traumatic with my first, rushed by ambulance to a higher level of care traumatic… BUT my other two were completely normal pregnancies :slight_smile: if the doctors say it’s safe, it probably will be :heart:

My first son I had a emergency c section and then they gave me pain meds I ended up in ICU on the ventilator for about 3 weeks. I was told not to have any more kids. I got pregnant with my second son I was considered high risk and had to have a ultrasound every week at the end. Delivery day came I went through surgery smooth and had no pain meds and got to come home regular.

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I had a very traumatic birth with my daughter where we both almost died. So I was terrified again. My second pregnancy was twins and I had a scheduled csection the time around. It went super smooth and easy with an easy recovery.

My first birth I had D-cells, and when my son came he had his cord wrapped 3 times into a slip knot. I delivered naturally. Had my son decided not to come when he had i would’ve had a csection. And if they’d known about the cord they would’ve done a csection as well. My second son wasn’t bad at all. The worst part was the epidural I got it administered TWICE and neither time worked. Also hemorrhaged but after the bleeding stopped everything was great. I delivered naturally pushed for under 10 minutes. Now my oldest is almost 3 and my youngest almost 1 and they’re happy and healthy.

My first was a rough delivery and recovery afterwards. He weighed 8 pounds 11 ounces. My second was only 7 pounds and was a much easier recovery. However in labor My blood pressure dropped to 65/40 and remained there even after 2 doses of meds to raise it. Also my second cried 24/7 the 6 months of her life :upside_down_face:

My first wasn’t great. 72hrs in labour, ended in an emergency csection as my hips were not wide enough for my baby. My second I had a planned csection and everything went perfect, no trauma, very little stress & was much more pleasant it being planned.

My first was an emergency c section , my second was a scheduled c section. Okay the first awful and I would never wish it upon anyone ever​:flushed: it was scary, the Dr made my c section to low so I have two c section scares… The 2 nd was more relaxed bit not as good as I’d hoped for. The surgery went fine the Dr was respectful and the nurses during the surgery were great.the crappy part came after I got out of bed right away and made sure I started walking to help myself. The nurse that was on her shift was straight up a total cunt! She tried to refuse my pain meds because I was doing so good with walking and everything a mom should do :roll_eyes: she was at the hospital 2nd shift for the three days I was there. She made snide comments ,rude and I was so uncomfortable when she came around I definitely made sure my husband didn’t leave the room because she was awful I didn’t want alone with her. Hoping the 3rd isn’t awful I’m very nervous about that because it’s the same hospital . Gotta love insurance :unamused:

My experience with my first was pretty horrible, I was 40 weeks 2 days and after being in the hospital for a while the decision to do an emergency C-section was made (baby’s heart rate kept dipping dangerously low) they gave me all the meds and epidural which partially paralyzed my lungs. I remember passing out on the table, barely able to hear anyone let alone my baby. We all thought I was going to die, but I didn’t! This second pregnancy wasn’t planned at all but with help from the doctors were able to come up with a safe delivery plan. Including a planned C-section.

My first birth wasn’t traumatic but my second was. He ended up having shoulder dystocia. We had to have extra nurses rush in and help push him out because he had gotten stuck. He was completely purple when he was born, not crying and they thought his collarbone born had been broken when we was pushed out. Luckily, everything was fine. He started crying, coloring went back to normal, no broken collarbone he was just extremely big. Weighed 10lbs and was 23in long!

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I had not so good births with both, 1st induced started pushing around 4pm his heart kept lowering every push he wasnt coming so had team in to help with the suction cup then he was stuck at the shoulders thankfully after they reposition me he was born and was all ok.
2nd they had people on standby because of last birth, thankfully they did as again i kept pushing and he wasnt coming this time was more traumatic. One midwife pushed down on my tummy the other had to reach inside to pull him he was born not breathing and floppy. The other team there to resuscitate him. The cord was across his neck but got him back after a few moments which felt like a good few minutes. The pain wasnt an issue i did on gas and air just if we decide to have a 3rd we will be booking a csection i will not go through that again not willing to put my baby at risk im just too small down there to birth naturally :pensive: x

I had a traumatic labor experience with my first that also led to an unplanned cesarean section. I’m about to have a planned c-section in two weeks. :slight_smile: They also told me that baby and I should be fine all around this time.

1st was 27.5 hour labour, she had a huge bean (head) and needed forceps and suction to come out. Thank god for epidural! 2nd one came out like a fart lol, out in 4.5 hours, much smaller head and I was shocked I could sit down that day without any pain. 1st one was 6 weeks before I was comfortable again.

I had a terrible birth for my daughter, I was 2 weeks past my due date and was finally admitted for induction. They started my induction and then gave me my epidural that didn’t work so they have me another and I was totally numb, they broke my water and I still didn’t have her until the next morning. When she was born the cord was wrapped around her neck twice, I had a dry birth and started hemorrhaging so they gave me a shot to stop the bleeding as it made me nauseated and I started dry heaving. Needless to say I waited until my daughter was almost 9 to have my son.

My sons birth was a pleasant experience, I explained to my Dr how my birth was for my daughter. I was induced at 40 weeks. I was admitted to the hospital at 8pm they put meds to help soften my cervix and started the induction 1st thing in the am, I started dilating, got my epidural and when the nurse came in to put a catheter Because they thought it may take a while, she said well we don’t need this catheter because you are ready to start pushing, my MD was finishing up a c section down the hall, I had my husband, my mom and my Mother in law and the Nurse in my room when I started pushing, I pushed 2 good pushes and the Nurse delivered my son with my family by my side. Best delivery of my life!!

Yes, we nearly lost our daughter at 34 weeks, reduced foetal movements, I knew something was wrong. Rushed via ambulance from one hospital to another. Birth was also not a beautiful experience having an emergency c section, but having our daughter was relieving!
We are now pregnant with our second, there will be 9.5 years age difference. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t worried, but the hospital has said just because it happened once it’s not always the case again x
All the best!

Completely different experience. My son was born in a small town hospital on a holiday, so it has me wondering if that were part of it. My daughter was born in a city hospital with lots of nurses and it was so easy. Not a single problem.

2nd was intense, the contractions were on top of each other, they were insane, it only last 3hrs or so thankfully. But man it was indefinitely intense…

Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. How was your second birth if your first was traumatic?

Easy as pie. I even walked to my room after being in recovery.

Loved my C section. I was up the next day no pain.

every birth is different. just because you had 1 bad one dont mean next will be. good luck and stop worrying. enjoy the process of making a bun in oven

First was hard. Second easy😁

My first was traumatic…we both could have died. However, with careful planning on the second one…it was beautifully simple.


My first birth was very traumatic but the deliveries after that were very normal. Do not stress out. You will be fine.

My heart literally stopped while giving birth to my first. I was SO afraid to have a second but her delivery was just fine infact it was perfect

I booked in an induction with an epidural. My uterus spasmed and I couldn’t go through that again. Second time around was much easier.

Keep God in your life and pray daily God has the last words not those doctors​:pray::pray:praying for you hun

First one me and baby almost died. Second one I was in labor 45 minutes and it was a breeze!

My second was so easy
…nothing for pain…to late by the time I wanted it even…
First was terrible.

I had a traumatic delivery and almost died. I adopted my second child rather than risk a repeat occurrence.

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First was so painful…didn’t have any idea what to expect…because of that the second one was even worse because I knew what was about to happen.

I almost lost my son and the drs almost lost me. 11 years later and we are both great and I have a soon to be 2 year old and my third is due in Oct. My daughter’s birth was completely different and was planned c section. It was easy and I was able to enjoy this birth completely different. Anything can happen and nothing is guaranteed but I was lucky to have great doctors and nurses both times and am grateful for my beautiful children

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My mother did. She waited 5 yrs after I was born and then she had 3 more.

My doctor blew me off. I ended up having an abruption and if I hadn’t been in the hospital for lamaze class when I ubrupted we would have both died. My daughter spent a month in the NICU and almost died at birth. I got a high-risk OBGYN for my second pregnancy. That time I was admitted for a month before I gave birth. My son was born 6 weeks early, so was my daughter, but we left the hospital together this time. He was 4lbs, 10oz and perfectly fine.

My first put me in ICU and her in nicu. Soooo,. Upon having my second it was a gamble. He turned out to be almost 10 lbs. I named him Chance. Because of the big chance I took on my life and family

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