How would it make you feel if your husband went out every weekend?

How would you feel if your spouse went out bowling and drinking every single weekend without even thinking about you being home with the kids? It makes me uncomfortable too because he is with his friends and their spouses but I also do not want him to feel like I am being his mom and making him stay home. But it would be nice to have a weekend with him for once.r

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Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. How would it make you feel if your husband went out every weekend? - Mamas Uncut

Id be concerned as to why he doesn’t want you to go with him? You said other spouses are there. Maybe address that

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People treat you how you let them treat you. Good luck.
P.S. Start making plans to go out with your friends. Let him stay home with the kids. See how he likes it.

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  1. if he doesn’t want you there then that’s a massive red flag that he’s either not liking your company anymore or he’s liking someone else’s.
  2. if he is inviting you and you just don’t want to go then he should respect that and do something with you and your children.

No matter how you slice this it’s an issue.

Does he know it bothers you? Start there if not.

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I think it’s fine if it’s a hobby, everyone needs a little down time but are you get a day out as well? If not then yeah that’s not cool and it’s a little odd that he doesn’t invite you what all the other couples go? Next time get a sitter and tell him you want to go.

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Then find a babysitter and go with

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Lack of communication open up to him. I’m sure he’d be happy you’d join or take you elsewhere. Compromising may later make you feel ignored etc.

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Why cant he have fun? Get a sitter and go with him? Or plan a night with him. He may not want to stay home every weekend

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If it were me, I’d hire a sitter to arrive after he leaves. Then I would show up at the bowling alley he is at to see what’s going on

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Why don’t u go as other spouses go?? Start booking ur own time out if u want to go out and he doesn’t or won’t let u join in
… he should really spend some time with the children too

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I’m the spouse that goes out bowling and drinking :joy:
Get yourself some friends or hobby to do while he stays home with the kids

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If he acts like a child, you act like a mom…

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get your self a good baby sitter get dressed up and go out with your friends . what is good for the goose is good for the gander

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i wouldn’t be with him anymore. he’s acting like a single man. he may as well be a single man.

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Get a babysitter & go with him. You two will figure it out, it might take time, tears, years… if you can make it through the worst the best is yet to come… don’t get it twisted, I’m not condoning neglect or abuse, I’m coming from 32 year relationship, 20 years married February 20th. Believe me, we’ve been through the ups, downs, all the eff arounds… split briefly twice but absolutely 100% are exactly where we were always meant to be. It takes work, love, understanding, communication everyday. Mine needed to realize that he was no longer a young “free” guy, that the family he was a part of required more than his income. Time to put on the big boy pants & be the dad, partner, man that he needs to be. You’ll know if he can’t make the cut. Where we are now was worth the work, 100%.

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Find a babysitter and go with. That’s what I’d do. But don’t go “with” him. Show up after hes been there a while and just show up without saying anything. See what’s going on. Haha :joy::smiling_imp:

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Does he even invite you to go? Like offer to find a babysitter and invite you? That’s the big question. You make it sound like he just goes without even considering if you’d want to go with him. If so, that’s terrible and it’d hurt my feelings too :cry:

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You are making your husband sound very inconsiderate of the way his actions would effect you and it doesn’t sound like he wants to spend much time with you or the kids if he’s out every single weekend!!

It’s good to go have fun on the weekend with friends but also talk to him and give him a suggestion of alternating weekends playing bowling so you get to see him and he still gets to play bowling

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Every weekend…no…and doesn’t invite you…I would be thinking maybe he has someone else going…but that’s me…unless you both go out together or go separately with your friends I say it’s not right… so does he do anything with the kids on the weekend

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Get a sitter one weekend. Tell him nothing, leave out a bit after he has left and show up. If you can come with a couple of your friends.

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Yes everyone needs some downtime with the others but it’s happening every single weekend and your not invited? Ask him why your never invited, but other spouses are going. I’d make plans behind his back, and leave before him so that he can’t go🤷🏼‍♀️

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Either find a sitter and go with him or tell him that you want to spend time with him home on the weekends too

Omg Sarah really jealous no husband shouldn’t be acting like he’s single

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Is getting a sitter and going with him once or twice a month an option?
If you haven’t expressed your feelings to him about the situation and it’s something he’s done for a while, he’s not going to think about it. It’s his normal.

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Can you and the kids go for the bowling then head home once they head out drinking? Have you asked if other spouses bring their kids and how that works? It is bowling, kids bowl.

went through that no fun

So he’s a single man who plays part time family man when he has nothing better to do.

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Hes a user he needs to know his place

Leave him home with the kids while you go out. Show him the position your left in so maybe he’ll see your point of view

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So make plans for the weekend and leave him to watch his own children give him a taste of his own medicine go out with those same friends and their spouses

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Every weekend… hell no!! Once a month, fine. But time with family is number 1 :heart:

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Get you a sitter and go out some weekends

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He’s using you. If he can’t put in any effort to give you time alone or with your friends then byeeeeee

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Go with him. Kids are allowed in bowling alley

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The first thing you need to understand is that communicating with your husband and asking him to be more present at home, does not mean you are trying to mother him. You need to communicate with your husband or nothing will change. Sit him down and explain that your children miss him, you miss him, and while it is a good for him to have “him time”, you feel every weekend is too much!

Be sure to consider his feelings too though. Ask him why he prefers spending every weekend out rather than at home. Try to compromise and come up with a solution.

Is he part of a bowling league? Is this something they do every Saturday that he is part of? Can you bring the kids and go as a family? I’m sure there is a compromise there somewhere but you both have to put in the effort to get it.

Best of luck! <3

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Not enough info to make the determination if he’s being neglectful or you just can’t let him have some free time.

Do you work outside the home?

When you all do go out do you make sure his interests are also a factor?

How often are you intimate with each other?

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Get a babysitter and go

Get a babysitter and join him at bowling. Also get a sitter and go out for date night. And find a day of the week you can leave the kids with him for a pedicure or massage or just something for yourself! You are not just to stay home with kids!! Live!!!

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He is married now he should stay at home

I would not stay with him.

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Single men go out every weekend. Why do you think your left out of that?

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Why don’t you and the kids go with him?

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He’s married with kids. And go out each weekend. Yes that’s a problem if he’s not making time for his family!
Family should be first

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Have you said anything to him? Does he know you have an issue with it? Tell him. Tell him you want him to stay home. Or that you want to go with him. Or just out with your friends.

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Girl, make you some plans!!!

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Closed mouths don’t get fed. Y’all are supposed to be a team. Express your concerns so a solution can happen.

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It would make me feel single and I’d leave his ass

Wait, the friends bring their spouses but he doesn’t bring you? Oh hell no.

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We struggle to find sitters for the overlap that happen somedays when I work much less going out.

If you are able get a sitter and go with him. My Aunt and Uncle did bowling league years ago and loved it but also had my Grandma who would watch the kids.

Get a sitter and get all dolled up and go out yourself without him, bet he changes his tune real quick

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If. He wants to act single then he sure would be

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If their wives are going why are you not invited? He can get you a sitter

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Must be nice for him to do whatever he wants when he wants. Absolutely no.

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Find a babysitter and go with him

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Speak up !
If u have a problem with him going out you need to sit him down face to face and let him know hey u have kids and a wife who want to spend time with u !! Please stop going out every weekend and pay attention to us !

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Speak up. Him going and hanging out with his friends and their spouses should include you and the kids too. Why wouldn’t he want to take, at the very, least his kids bowling too?

Leave his behind. If he’s comfortable with y’all’s absence…then he’s comfortable.

Full on man child get him told and make sure your going out having some free time xx

They dnt care typical man. They selfish and dgaf

Girl I did that crap for 10 years. My ex husband was cheating the whole time with his friends wife’s friends. I think it finally came up to 9 different women.

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Why not just talk to him and tell him how you feel? Communication is the only way a marriage has any chance at lasting.

Yeah nope. Like if it was a weekend a month, sure. Not every weekend and if that’s a deal breaker for him then so be it. Hell I don’t get to see my bestie once a month. Once every 2 maybe.

HE wouldnt be around for long bye bye …:thinking:

Babysitter? So you can go with him too like the other spouses….

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Why can’t you communicate that with him instead of us? Also you’re kind of making yourself sound like the babysitter, and he also isn’t prioritizing his Marriage. The work week is hectic, and exhausting and the weekend is when we unwind. It sounds like you and your kids are a part of the work week. It’s not an issue you can’t work through though.

Are you waiting on permission to get a babysitter why haven’t you said anything to him.

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Talk to him momma I know how you feel I was in your shoes once until I made it known how I felt it will more than likely cause a riff but that’s okay sometimes a argument is what it takes. We don’t have a babysitter so I know if that’s your case it is hard.

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then maybe you should tell him this, And there is no reason why you can’t have an evening out with the girls

The fact he doesn’t even invite u , should tell you everything big red flags acting single narcissist at its best

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If the spouces are going I would and in the past have had a problem with that! That not right at ALL! Guys night is different…

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If you haven’t already, you need to talk to him about it and let him know how you feel. I think going out with friends is fine, but you should be included too and if you want to make plans just for the two of you then that should be okay too. I think having a balance is important. It does make me wonder why he never ask you to go with him though. I know if it were my husband he’d want me to be included and not just be at home with our daughter every weekend.

Drop the kids off at the bowling alley each night he is gone, walk out the door and head for the bar. Kinda hard to bowl watching kids and you can’t continue to drink if you drive. If it’s good for you, it’s good for him.

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Communication is huge…if he thinks you’re okay with him going out every weekend he will keep doing it…men don’t get hints so just be straight up honest with him…don’t come off naggy but definitely have a conversation with him.

I’d definitely be talking to him and let him know how you feel.

I go out with my friends often. So, I wouldn’t mind if my husband was doing the same. However, unless it’s like Netflix and wine night, my husband is always invited. So I expect the same. I think it is odd that he doesn’t invite you when all the other spouses are going. Do his friends not like you? I would be even more angry if my husband chose to spend time with people who didn’t like me and williningly left me home every weekend for them. If that isn’t the issue, I’d let him know you are not okay with being left every weekend. My husband and I had this issue in the beginning of our marriage. I was suffering PPD, and he was gone all the time with his boss and other friends. It was taxing on our marriage. I finally had enough and said something. it hasn’t been an issue since.

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Talk to each other. Tell him.

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You deserve nights out too

Communication. Tell him you both need a sitter. And every weekend is ridiculous. Marriage and children should come before a weekend bender.

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Red flags EVERYWHERE. Either tell him how you really feel, get dressed and go with him or take the kids to a sitter and have your own fun!! Or divorce his ass!! :tada:

He makes the rules, play be them. Get a sitter and go with your friends.

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Can u go with him and sorry but if your suck at home all the time then he’s needs to as well. I can see him going every now and then but it needs to be limited.

I usually just leave before he does lol we both go do whatever we want and first one out the door wins

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Ugh :persevere: I feel you …I know exactly how this feels mine does this too

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Does he ask you to go and you don’t want to or does he just go alone? If he asked and you don’t go then he has the right to go. But if he’s just going alone then it needs to be limited to once a month or evert other weekend.

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That wouldn’t be ok with me for very long. Why should he get to go out while you stay at home all the time with your kids. Completely thoughtless if you ask me. My man knows better

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Considering I’m never allowed to leave he house without atleast one kid, I’d be pretty aggravated.

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Find a babysitter and go out with your friends. I would.

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Relationships die from not spending time together. Explain to him your marriage deserves time together. If you want to go, get a sitter. But you in no way should be his built in babysitter that allows him to do whatever he wants.

Get a sitter and when he says he’s going out, say so am I….

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Ask him to start spending a weekend or 2 with you and going out the other 2. That is very reasonable. He shouldn’t be going out every weekend anyways. If he does not want to and still goes out every weeeknd. Leave him. He will never change or care.

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The other wife’s go why are you not going

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He is disrespectful and selfish

Oh hell no! That would not work for me. You deserve to have a break too.

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L0ck all the doors after he has gone .Make him beg to get in then make him listen about how you feel .

If the others spouses are there why aren’t you.? Get a sitter and go out with friends. Let him know your going out. Let him know you expect a week end out with him and the kids.

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Get a sitter and go if he acts out about that there’s a problem

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Aw my son’s father did this and would never let me go out. He was cheating. I left him. It won’t change unfortunately sounds like he needs to grow up and he is possibly cheating. I’m sorry but you don’t deserve that.

Get ready before he gets home and then minute he walks in the door you leave and go have fun

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Maybe ask if you can join him next weekend? And hire a babysitter. Or tell him you’d like to have a weekend together

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