My youngest is 3 (4 in December), this past year, we have been dealing with behavioral problems, and I need advice on when to know what’s normal and not. I have three older kids that range from 14-19, and I can honestly sit here and say that I’ve never seen a temper tantrum until my youngest. She is somewhat behind on speech, but every time I’ve brought it up to her doctor, they say she’s fine and probably just quiet because she has so many older siblings to talk to her. She was half potty trained and suddenly just stopped using the potty last month. (I think that part may have something to do with her stepsister visiting for the first time in a year) She screams. And I don’t mean just a squeak. She screams on the top of her lungs, loud enough that the neighbors two doors down can hear her. While she is screaming, she throws herself around and thrashes. There is no calming this kid down once we get to this point, and riding it out lately has been a 2 + hour ordeal. The worst is bedtime. I don’t know what else to do. I feel like her doctor doesn’t hear my concerns with her. Any advice is appreciated. My husband and I have five other teenaged kids between us and neither one of us have ever dealt with behavior like this
She’s not alone with the teenagers, is she? I hope she’s not being mistreated by her siblings
My daughter went through this at that same age. I had the same thoughts, my daughter needs “heads ups” doesn’t do welll with change, were a split family and her dads side has 3 older kids that his gf has, best advice I can say is- don’t get mad about the tantrums or show anger to her abojt the way she’s acting. Took awhile for me, to have many calm discussions ask why are you feeling like this, 30 mins before bedtime I’d have to give a notice like “hey in a few minutes we’re going to clean up” or brush our teeth. Hope that helps. It helped me, somewhat until things mellowed out. Don’t get down out yourself kids are tough sometimes!
Get a different doctor. I hate when the doctors blame it on age or siblings.
My son is autistic and recently diagnosed with Oppositional defiant disorder (ODD).Not saying that this is what your daughter has but that much of the behavior you described is what I witnessed in my son.
Seek a second opinion. Demand evaluations if you are that concerned. You are her voice.
My kids are all like this… My older two have adhd and bipolar and my youngest is autistic
If you want to reach out to me im going through this with my girl its awful we are waiting on home based services to come help and a evaluation for her
Sounds very much like her behaviours resemble autistic traits. Push the dr. Mention autism. Even request another doctor or to be referred to a specialist. (I don’t know how the medical world works in your country). But definitely don’t leave it unquestioned. If you feel your daughter isn’t age appropriate. (My 2 eldest kids were like this) delayed speech, regression with development, delayed development, violence, self harm behaviours during meltdown. Both have autism xx
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If her speech is delayed the tantrums could be from frustration because she can’t communicate how she is feeling.
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If I were you I would get a referral to a speech therapist. Some insurances dont require a referral. Get her evaluated, you are the parent here, you do what you feel is best.
My daughter had colic and screamed in pain. I didn’t know what to do then a year later I saw she had a tongue tie. I asked her Pediatrician and he dismissed it. Then at her 3 year appointment last year I told them I thought she had sensory issues with clothes, they dismissed me saying it was a phase.
Now I am here with an almost 4 year old who has been diagnosed with SPD and in OT. Not because my Pediatrician told me, but because I reached my breaking point and took it into my own hands because my daughter really needed help and I did too.
No. Not normal. Need a different doctor.
My daughter is not like that and she seems easier (not meaning to be offensive) but she was diagnosed with ADHD/ODD
Definitely get a second opinion. I would find a behavior specialist and not just a pediatrician.
Being behind on speech or lack of speech can cause huge behavioral
Issues because she is struggling to verbalize her emotions and feelings. If she can’t verbalize what is going on or what she needs she will end up acting out. My son was a huge cry baby and would throw himself out on the floor screaming. Once his speech picked up he verbalized his feelings and what’s going on instead of having a full blown tantrum. Seek out an evaluation from a speech therapist, they will be able to tell you if it’s speech or sensory issues or both. Get a 2nd opinion from a different doctor bc many times you need a referral from doc to get a speech therapy evaluation.
Record it for the doctor
As a parent, are you giving her enough attention because that could be the reason or someone is bullying her when you are not looking. My granddaughter started a tantrum and insteadve of giving up, I started hugging and kissing them. I’m a single grandparent raising 2 little girls who are the same age as your daughter. I know it can get tiring because you have other children. Set aside for her time with you. If someone is doing that to her, you need to set some boundaries for the bully. In the long run, she going to be a mad child. If she doesnt want to potty train then dont force it on her as well. She is still a baby…
Second opinion for sure, she definitely sounds like she has some autistic traits, and early detection is key to change the behaviors and help her express herself
My 4 year old is like this when he gets mad he screams and kicks anything in his path… and have been told he needs to get evaluated for speech… not sure if it’s a “terrible 4” or what
It’s normal all my children has done this and only one hand to go to Speech therapy and it’s bucse the brain go faster then want they can say so they get Frustrated very easily when you don’t understand them or what they want to try to say good luck mama it’s normal
She is having a hard time communicating. Get a different doctor and get a referral to a speech therapist. And also a referral to get her evaluated, but I honestly think the tantrums are because she’s having a hard time communicating and maybe a little with processing everything around her. I also hope that is all and that no one else there is mistreating her.
I would talk to a behavioral health professional. I work in this field and it could be something more serious and her doctor isn’t trying to find out what is happening.
*** trigger alert*** im not saying this is the case but also dont push it aside… My daughter acts the same way and sometimes worse. Potty training, hour long tantrums etc etc… She also has been " touched" by her biological father. And all of a sudden started acting this way after the incident. Ive brought her in as well but have been told she is to young to start any kind of treatment( therapy etc) shes 3.
I would bring her to another doctor.
That’s why she has tantrum because of her speech don’t force her
Second opinion always. If you ever question anything a dr is saying or doing, or not saying or doing, get a second opinion. Especially when it comes to your kids and knowing something is wrong.
I would have her sleep evaluated. Lack of quality sleep equals horrible behavior problems and can even explain the speech delay.
Tykes and Teena has an infant mental health program! Also, females are much less likely to get diagnosed with Autism and go undetected for years 
ABA therapy helps. My son did the same thing as your daughter minus the screaming and sleeping. ABA helps with behaviors, manners, fine motor skills, social skills, and some education for preschool.
Does she get disciplined? If she knows she gets what she wants then of course she will have tantrums. But I’ve made mine stand in the corners until they can talk to me properly.
Only YOU would know what’s not right with her find doctor that will listen to YOU. Try looking into sign language with her basic words for her start communicating with you. My daughter was late talker but I taught her sign language that helps ALOT. and she did had really bad long tratums turns out she had ADHD. It gotten better as she got into therapy later on. First work on communicating and finding doctor. Hope this helps 
My second daughter used to have screaming tantrums about the same age. My MIL suggested magnesium. I got her 400 milligram chewable tablets from CVS. It helped a lot with the tantrums and it also helped her go to sleep at night. I still give them to her because if I don’t it takes her like 2 hours to go to sleep if I don’t.
I agree it could be lack of speech. I would also recommend testing for autism. The frustration level you have described is indictive of autism.
I would see a developmental pediatrcian
I would find a different doctor who will listen to your concerns. My son started speech therapy when he was two because he had a delay, there’s no reason to wait and see - early intervention improves outcomes. The behavior issues could be linked to her having difficulty communicating.
I agree to watch the teenagers alone with her, maybe putting maybe some cameras in the house or in her room at night, something is happening that’s causing regression. You need to find out what it is.
Watch super nanny- it works
My oldest daughter was just like this. Would knock things over and throw things at me, finally when she threw a toddler chair at me I seeked counseling for her when she was around 4. She was diagnosed with ODD, but the counseling wasn’t helping so I took her out. Then when she started 1st grade we moved. In October he regular teacher left to have a baby and she had a different one, halfway through the school year her episodes and tantrums started again, at home and school. They had to evacuate the classroom a couple times because she became “dangerous” i got her into counseling again. Where she was again diagnosed with ODD and anxiety. This time counseling helped, she’s almost 9 now and very rarely has violent tantrums.
My youngest daughter has problems communicating, shuts down and screams. Her head start teacher caught onto this early. She was diagnosed with SPD, and they did testing for autism, which she doesn’t have. Her speech is more “baby talk” and she’s been in OT through head start, preschool, and kindergarten. It’s helped so much and she exceeded expectations in kindergarten.
Get a second opinion, and counseling, you’re her voice.
Behavioral specialist for sdvice
When she is having one of her meltdowns tantrums,try videoing it and show it to the nurse and doc. My daughter has been diagnosed with autism adhd and behavioral disability
My daughter is 2.5 and she does the same thing (tantrums) recently I’ve realized that she is just super tired and doesn’t really know why she’s upset or how to calm herself down. She has a shopkins cookie pillow and I ask her if she wants to yell at cookie— she will put her own face in the pillow and scream and sometimes even punch the pillow. I bring it out whenever it seems like she needs to release frustration. It has helped immensely! I can’t even begin to describe the difference it makes. Most of the time she is all smiles afterwards. Sometimes they just need to let it all out.
I will put money on autism. My son all he did was scream…nothing to scream about but just scream…I was worried neighbors would call cops or something cause he was sooooo loud. His speech was very delayed. Potty training was a nightmare. When it comes to autism unless you know what to look for you won’t know or think its " bratty behavior " its not! I knew when he was born he possibly was autistic as how he responded to me and only me and the “look” in his eyes. He is 9 now. Very loveable. He was 5 when we finally got him potty trained. Walking was around 3…speech is getting better and better. He’s High functioning and autism is different for everyone. When he has his moments I have him sit on my lap and he rubs my face and cheeks cause he says they are soft and it actually calms him down. Oh and he was diagnosed with autism till he was 7.
Walk to another room where she can’t see you. When she sees no one can see or hear her she will stop. Give her no attention and don’t give in to her.
My daughter was/is speech delayed, she is about to be 3. She used to get very frustrated when she couldn’t communicate what she wanted. We had to stop talking for her and really push her to talk. She is also extremely shy with new people. We brought her to speech therapy and it definitely made a big difference. She is about caught up now! As for the fits, some may be normal/frustration. We will have her sit either in her room or on her little couch to calm down. And she can’t leave or get up until she is calm and feels “all better”. You can give her a book or just have her sit. Afterwards we count to 10 and and then give her a hug and let her know we love her. We do the same for timeout except we tell her what she that was wrong and then we move on.
Go to a different doctor.
My daughter did ok through terrible 2s now Trying threes ! Trying really hard to set clear boundaries and being consistent with her because she definitely knows how to throw a fit ! Also trying to implement more positive reinforcement with a goal chart where she can earn stickers at the end of the week she has all 7 she gets a surprise I found my self feeling like a bad momma because I only seemed to being saying stop or no hopefully this brings more positive vibes to our house hold with more positive interactions
First, find a doctor that listens to your concerns. Second, speech therapy will help tremendously even if she has no speech problems it will get her speaking. Third, discipline !!! Do not ride out the tantrums, do not feed into it, punish her and stick with it. I have five…two of which are autistic and even they know what is allowed and what isn’t so unless they’re too far gone mentally (not even trying to sound mean here just being real) then discipline can occur. Until the speech is there sign language or picture cards tend to help as trouble with communication can lead to bad behavior.
My daughter does the same thing and her dr in the process of diagnosing her with bipolar
I was like this as a kid, except it would last like 5 hours.
Put her in a cold shower for a second to snap her out of it.
Next time she throws a tantrum throw one with her no matter where you are. She will get up and walk away.
Record her to show your Dr he likely hears “tantrum” and envisions a typical tantrum
Find a developmental pediatrician. Save the regular ped for earaches and physicals.
Go see a child psychologist. You can look for one at your local pediatric hospital. My daughter did this from birth until today. She was a delayed walker and speaker, though she had words, she was impossible to understand until 4ish. She was diagnosed ADHD and with a mood disorder at 7, though we knew very very early on about the ADHD. She would have qualified for an ODD diagnosis then too, but the doctor didn’t feel she had the disdain for authority required, yet she had the symptoms. She was recently diagnosed ASD at age 11, and the mood disorder was dropped. It’s not normal to throw tantrums about the same stuff for hours a day. Neurotypical kids get more creative, or they just take the hint. Atypical kids are just trying to survive as comfortably as they can. It comes out however it comes out. She may be too young for a proper diagnosis. No harm in starting the process now and seeing where you can go with it. Maybe they will find out she’s just has issues communicating. Who knows?
Get a referral to a paediatrician, my eldest was like this I had to fight for years to be heard, finally she was tested multiple times and all tests came back and she is asd. Girls present different to boys and seem to be harder to get a diagnosis for. Don’t give up
See a different doctor. Speech delays can cause extreme frustration in kids because they are desperately trying to tell you things and no one is understanding. Why is she have such tantrums? Are you trying to gel her figure it out? Keep routines the same at bedtime , you try to stay calm and if she’s at an an 11 volume then you need to be a 5. You know your limits and you need help and if your doctor won’t see a different one. Good luck.
Get another doctor opinion
Sounds a lot like my middle daughter. She was diagnosed with ADHD and ODD this spring at 5.
It is frustrating not being able to verbalize what exactly she is feeling but make sure you are all ALWAYS being consistent with your verbiage and let her know that is not appropriate behavior. Have a fit throwing room/closet that she has to stay in until she is able to be calm. Make sure it is somewhere safe and she can’t hurt herself then walk away-dont feed into! I once had a pediatrician tell me if I had to hold the door closed or put an outside lock on it do it-the point is not to give in to them or you’ve lost the battle and you will continue to loose the battle. Good luck and know this phase will pass!
My youngest was like this, used to hit me and his brother for me reason, smash his room up and fly off the handle regularly. Doctor just said he was a naughty boy!!! 4 year later and he is calmer but still got a really nasty temper but better behaved and doing really well in school xx
My youngest daughter is the same way an she will be 7 in November can’t get her tested cause of this dam virus an it had to be done during school hours which they pushed off again yet September 8 2020. I know mine had ADHD just can’t get her tested an meds yet cause of the Virus. Best of Luck to u.
I agree MartynRenee Todd, my son was in the 99% percentile, talked at 7months walked at 10months and never had any signs of the spectrum until he started having stereotypies…usually confused with tourette’s…(involuntary muscle spasms). Tested negative for Tourette’s but the neurologist said Aspergers, my son is also ADHD. I’d request to see a pediatric neurologist and Express my concerns. I had my son potty trained by 3, went back to work and he completely regressed. I’d definitely seek another opinion, you’re her mother, YOU KNOW YOUR CHILD
My first instinct is testing for autism spectrum. My friend’s daughter exhibited some of these same issues. She was diagnosed at 30 months. Was making most milestones ago appropriately until marked regression until the diagnosis. She is now 8 and with a lot of hard work from mom and therapy is doing well
My nephew did the same thing…in stores, home, didn’t matter. Then he’d hold his breath and start all over. Ignore it…shes seeing how long it takes you to give in and give her whatever she’s the a fit about. …She will figure it out if you stay strong. And as for not talking much…shes the baby of the family, and usually gets what she wants before shes made to ask in words…normal behavior…
Sounds more like shes dealing with some kind of trauma. Kids act out for so many reasons but this story has me wondering a bit…
I know this sounds crazy but this worked for us my child’s behavior was so bad I had to lock her in a room so she couldn’t get hurt and neither could I. She also had ADHD . We took her off of dairy, sugar, gluten and dyes . I know this is a expensive diet . We did this for 6 months . First get rid of things in the diet slowly . Make sure you been off of these things for 6 months. Slowly give back 1 thing in the diet and see if any of those triggers the behavior problem . My daughter it was red food coloring and chocolate. I had paid $5,000 for a program called brain balance and this was one of the first steps we had to besides some exercises. Drs were no help to me. I figured I could share my experience and what a difference I had seen in my child. No more locking her in a room until she calmed down hardly any melt downs. You can find clean eating. recipe’s on line . This really helped us and no medication. Also we added fish oil supports the brain, vitamin D mood stabler and probiotics. I know this is long but if you only knew what we went through with our child and what a different child she is today.
Many not hearing the way we Do !! My cousin was 5 years old when they found he did hear the right way as we do. Good luck!!
Have her tested for adhd and autism
Sounds like my daughter when she was the same age. Every child is different but mine was diagnosed with ADHD, unspecified anxiety and a speech delay. After a few med changes she was fine on the meds & still is! She just graduated high school with a diploma & a trade certificate in Legal & Protective Services!! You have to get them diagnosed first so you know for sure. Good luck!
I had this same issue, I started documenting everything and video taped one of her meltdowns and brought all of it to her Dr before he finally decided towards the next step. You are your child’s voice and advocate! Good luck to you😊
You might want to video the tantrums so the doctor can see the whole thing. Plus it documents that she is doing it to herself if she hurts herself. Maybe at bedtime you can give her melatonin (as ur doctor first?). This usually calms people down and they can fall asleep faster.
Maybe time for a different doctor if insurance allows you to switch. Hopefully she will out grow them. Sometimes all you can do is ride it out while letting her know you are waiting to talk to her about the problem. As long as she’s not hurting herself or anyone else.
Change doctors if you are able to. The one you have doesn’t seem to be really listening to your concerns. A trick my therapist taught me is to document what triggers the outbursts. What time of day does it get really bad? What’s was happening prior to the tantrum. A lot of kids hate to be told they can’t do whatever they want. Tantrums usually come from that. Once you switch doctors ask about getting her tested for autism. I believe she is at the age when the symptoms first manifest.
My son was the same way he diagnosed was autism went he was 3yearsold he is much.better now he is with and ABA therapy and.spech therapist tell the doctor good luck
You should get a referral to a neurologist and/or behaviorist (sometimes you can find a doc who specializes in both). Do not panic, but several different things you mention sound like Autism Spectrum disorder. If it is the sooner she gets help the better! If it’s not, no harm done, and maybe the doc could recommend a good child therapist.
Make sure she is safe then walk away, the more attention you give this the worse it gets then when she is over it you will see a difference, if your Dr hasn’t said anything about autism just maybe she needs some extra attention one on one, take her, just her out for ice cream or to the park, then make a special day and time just for you two, you’d be surprised on what a wonderful child she will become, I hope it works out, you have my prayers
My oldest did the same when she was that age and was diagnosed with adhd… her pediatrician had never seen a toddler act like she did before let alone destroy an entire house like she did during a fit. Good luck and hang in there. There is light at the end of the tunnel
Try a pre kindergarten (like birth to 3) to see if they can evaluate. Is she is still not speaking that may be some of the frustration she is showing, i would try to get a full evaluation dont for speech, behavioral and neurological. It may just be a phase but if its not better to know sooner than latter. If doc doesn’t listen get a second opinion
Trust your momma instincts and advocate for your child! Find a developmental pediatrician who can do a thorough screening. 
Definitely seek a specialist, possibly a child psychologist. Also check autism spectrum. I would exhaust all possibilities to get my child the help she needs. Good luck, my prayers are with you and your kids. Talk to the step sister too, see if you can determine why she acts up when she visits. May or may not be a coincidence.
Find a developmental pediatrician and contact your local school system for an evaluation. It is typical for a three-year-old to have some tantrum behaviors but lasting two or more hours is not. Most school systems have developmental classes and therapies for children who are identified between the ages of 2-5. I have been an Early Childhood Special Education teacher for 41 years. Early intervention can have a profound impact on children and families.
Being behind on speech is a big factor she cant communicate what she needs or wants
Imagine being in a foreign country and not knowing the language that’s how she feels
When she starts her tantrum ask her if she wants or needs something
Do you want a snack , toy , are you ok, etc
Getting speech therapy can help too
In Indiana we have First Steps an agency that will come to your home and do a free evaluation and therapy till a child is school age maybe your state has a similar program.I agree speech therapy is a must but use someone that works with young kids. It definitely sounds like other things are affecting her. Many things can look like autism and there are many levels.I was a nanny for a child that had Apraxia of Speech another that had ADHD and ODD and another child that had a Sensory Disorder. They each are in on going therapy. The earlier you can interview with therapy the better. If your Dr wont listen get a second oppinion.What you are seeing in not normal.Good luck.
This doesn’t sound normal. I work with 4 & 5, headstart/NC PREK. I have seen some pretty bad stuff from this age. I would get a second opinion. I wouldn’t be as concerned about the speech as long as what she is saying is understood. Some children are just quiet. The behavior does sound possible Autism spectrum. I would definitely try to get her evaluate, behavior at the least, and I would recommend a complete evaluation including physical, occupational, speech and behavior. Don’t forget God’s word says, " and this to shall pass." Mom’s know their children go with your gut feeling mom. Get the evaluation it will put your mind at ease.
Time to find another doc. Definitely not “normal” but early intervention is the key and you need a referral. Does she have sensory or food texture issues at all? Something isn’t processing correctly and she’s having trouble regulating herself. Main thing isn’t you’re not doing anything wrong to cause this and (if you’re thinking this) you’re not a bad mama 
. Definitely keep pushing and her her an evaluation and see what’s what. Early intervention is the best
A child therapist (I am one, and she needs one) and a second and even 3rd opinion from a doctor. There are many good parenting books for difficult child behavior and great classes, too. I wish you all the best!
First I’d recommend a new pediatrician if possible. A good pediatrician will refer you to specialists for peace of mind even if they dont completely agree something is wrong. Also you can call your local elementary school psychologist they can help you find the resources you need. Most states offer testing and services for free.
My 4 1/2 year old granddaughter is the same. She is autistic. If that is what In fact is going on, the tantrums could be caused by overstimulation. Some autistic children have acute hearing and it puts them on overload and causes episodes. To them running water sounds like a waterfall or fluorescent lights have a faint buzzing we can’t hear but they hear it like thunder in their ears. That’s why you see so many of autistic children having meltdowns in stores. All of the noise is too much for them. They are also very strong during these episodes. It’s worth bringing up with the doctors. Good luck. I hope you get it figured out.
I took custody of my granddaughter at 2 1/2. She was fine until she turned 3. She started doing things like your daughter. My MD listened and recommended a child psychologist that involved play therapy. I highly reccomend that if you take to a psychologist make sure they do play therapy. There was a play room she would go into and she loved it. The MD had the toys strategically placed in the room. If she played with certain toys he knew what was going on in her mind, without her talking. We discovered she was feeling that her life was out of control and she was frustrated because she couldn’t control everything. We placed some new routines in which she was able to make decisions and the tantrums. She’s 18 now, still likes to be the boss, but I’ve learned how to work with her.
I’m going to say you need a second opinion and maybe a video with audio of this behavior. Doctors can key up on physical characteristics as well. God bless your efforts.
She needs a therapist to teach you and her calming points to help her. Also change her pediatrician. She needs structure. Video tape her tantrums so you can show a professional. Reach out for help. Do not give in to her tantrums, that’s what she wants. Best of luck!!
I would have her evaluated by child psychiatrist some thing is not fight trust your instincts she my be autistic or adhd there are several different levels of these. Hang in there
If she’s delayed in speech that might be why, she can’t explain…I loved what my kids learned in daycare, learning, seeing other kids… I personally believe it helped their growth a lot
Contact your local school district to set up a developmental evaluation. This is at no cost to you. Explain your concerns starting with speech and behavior. Often a delay in speech or language can manifest in behavior issues. You know your child better than a doc who sees her once a year for 15 minutes. Ask for the speech/language pathologist to do the evaluation, they are much better trained to assess development than docs are, and can include those needed for further evaluation. (Retired SLP/Early Childhood Special Ed Teacher here)
I read many responses that said get a second opinion, might be ADHD, autism, etc… the truth is every child is different and no two are alike. I would stick with one professional and not be jumping around. Your dr may be correct and she may simply out grow it. My twin grand children did. They were no 3 and 4. There temper tantrums, and they were wild ones, (Screaming, laying on the floor, banging their heads hard on the floor,)were the only way they knew how to express themselves and get attention. Their mother, bless her, just remained calm and simply said when you are done we will…if they did it in public she simply left and went home. They lasted one full year and just like that they stopped and two more well adjusted kids you will not meet. It is very hard to remain calm and deal with it on a day to day basis. She found sticking to the same time routine everyday really helped. Hang in there… hopefully over time this shall pass.
Our grandson was kinda the same except not as extreme. Has she had ear infections? Tubes placed? Tonsils removed.
He was hearing correctly when he didn’t have ear infections and garbled words when he had infections so, he said very little. He had tubes put in and suddenly his tonsils were very swollen. They re.oved them and he is a totally different kid. Most of the tantrums have quit and he now talks but his speech is more of a 2yr old then a 3yr old but, that is because it’s like he has to start learning.
Trust your gut feeling. You know your child better than a dr who sees her for 5 min. A new dr and an early childhood therapist.
My advice would be to get a new doctor. And to maybe get tested got autism.
You need to get a new dr. This child has issues that need attention now before its really out of control. God bless her and her family
Get a different doctor. Some doctors just dont want to take the time to do any tests to see what the issue is. They just pass it on as a phase that they will grow out of. Follow your instinct because you know your child best
Sounds like it would be best to have her evaluated by a psychologist. NOT a psychiatrist but a psychologist to assess the behavior, identify if it is ASD or another behavioral concern and give some good recommendations and treatment options!
Try a different doctor a lot of children with hearing issues have behavioral issues so try that and also contact your school district for early intervention