lol they won’t take your baby away. Just file with the courts so you can have a order in place and abide by the order!
Can u say narcissist:woman_shrugging:
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This whole comment section is sickening. So she can have sex with him and get pregnant then just decide she doesn’t want to be with him and basically be able to just keep his kid away from him. Women are so vindictive and nasty when it comes to dads that love their children. A father is seen as only a money tree and that’s it, but all yall would be wanting his head if he didn’t want to pay child support or have nothing to do with a pregnant girlfriend. Double standards at its finest. Honestly you are probably doing him a favor you sound like a very difficult person.
Screenshot and save all threatening texts/ messages
How sad for that child. You are so wrong for not trying to co parent. You don’t have to be together to show the baby a happy and healthy life. What kind of parent intentionally ruins a bond between father and child?!? You ain’t shit. That baby deserves better.
Don’t be with him then… there’s no law saying you have to. He can take you to court if he’s interested in being involved. Don’t put him on the birth certificate and he won’t have rights until the court issues them. The court will give him visitation but if you are breastfeeding, it won’t be much until the child is over a year old. Start no by saving every text, documenting every call and what he says. Try to only communicate through text so it’s easily saved. This way, when you go to court, you’ll be able to show if he’s crazy.
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What’s best for the child in the long run ?
You’re politely telling him you don’t want to start a neutral family with him, why not straightout tell him you want to be single mom? He is the father and will be part of the baby’s life so might as well get used to it. He wants to be part.
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You asked for advice, then answered your question yourself: the court.
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Imagine you knew he was pregnant wit your baby and he was saying to you bring me to court to see the baby
He is the dad and has rights, hopefully he will grow up a bit and stop the harassment but you also need to grow up and not use this baby to punish him
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If u dont want to be w him , that wont change. I tried when it happened to me and nope was hell. Would of been easier on child if split up before born bc unhealthy feelings r shared by all involved. Comfort and peace to u, love …good luck
Yeah, they aren’t going to give him custody just because you “lead him on.” The court couldn’t care less about the relationship you two had, they only care about what’s best for baby. But I would suggest being the one who starts the custody case, it’ll look better in the courts eyes if you do it first cause it’ll make it look like you care more. (Speaking from personal experience) I would say try to work out a proper visitation schedule without court first (then have it signed by a judge) but it doesn’t sound like that’ll be possible with how he’s reacting so just take him to court yourself.
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It sounds like he is trying to tell you he wants to work out a way for you to both be involved with the baby, together or not, and you are making him feel like that’s not an option and he’ll have to take you to court just to see his kid. So he can’t be involved at all with the pregnancy and then you’re cutting off communication with him completely so he’s upset. And rightfully so. You need to grow up and have a face to face conversation with him and let him know you don’t want to be with him in a romantic relationship…but this is just as much his child as it is yours. You don’t get to tell him he can’t be involved and that isn’t going to look good for you in court. Keep in contact with him and you need proof that you are acting like a reasonable adult and in the best interest of your child and trying to work out a coparenting plan with him.
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He needs to understand he can be a dad without being in a relationship with you. Y’all can learn to coparent with out being a couple. He seems like he wants the family aspect of the whole thing though.
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Then don’t be with him. Sounds like you saw his true colors which is why you don’t want to be with him. When baby is born go to the courts and file for custody and child support against the father.
Wait, I could be wrong and I’m not trying to be mean or take sides. I see this from both sides. Not many men take the initiative to be a part of their child’s life. When one tries to, it seems to backfire on him. I think you should let him be involved with boundaries. Tell him you don’t want a relationship with him but he can be involved as long as he isn’t spiteful. Get another phone. Keep the one you currently have but change the number. Have another one for him to contact you on. He does have rights to his child. I just hope you both aren’t spiteful to each other. That will cause more harm for both kids. Your son is just as innocent as this baby. Please do the right thing but it’s okay to set boundaries. Good luck!
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He can’t take the baby away from you unless he can prove you unfit. Change your number. You could always get him in harassment. Don’t give in.
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You don’t hv to be with him, but he is the father and if he wants to be a part of the childs life he can and will. I would go to court, ask what you need to do. I would also keep ALL text messages, voice-mail anything that could be used against him if he is threatening you or anything. If not then there is no reason why he cant be a part of the childs life. You would hv to show proof thst he is an unfit father and then maybe you would hv full custody with him hving visitation rights but courts/judges these days favor both parents equal custody unless you can prove without doubt he is unfit to hv him/her half time.
Well you will have to co parent with him so figure it out. He has a right to be at dr appts and anything to do with the baby.
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To be honest I’m not sure what’s more selfish here ! You getting pregnant by a man you don’t want which seems quite bazar! So you want to stop him having anything to do …Or you bringing a child into the world that may or may not get to see his dad … still because you got pregnant by someone you don’t want!!
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You don’t ever have to be with anyone you don’t want to. He will always have a right and a responsibility to be there for that child, but it doesn’t mean the two of you have to be together. That’s all there is to it.
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He isn’t harassing you. He wants to be part of his child’s life
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Idk… I feel like he wants to be apart of the child’s life mostly… and telling him he can take you to court for “visitation” leads me to believe that you’re not wanting to allow him to be apart of a child’s life that is half his. If you don’t want to be with him fine but there’s no reason that he shouldn’t be able to be a big part of his child’s life instead of just allowing him “visitation”…
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If you’re no longer together. That’s considered harrassment and stalking. Contact police and report it. Keep all the texts telling him you want him to stop texting and you’re through with the relationship. I went through this. If you’re not married you don’t even have to put his name on birth certificate.
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He only has a right to be involved with the baby. It is NOT on you to provide him access if it creates an unsafe environment for you or your child. He cannot be allowed to think he has rights to you because of the baby
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Ok so Now is the time before baby is born to set the stage to how this will work . Get it all ironed out so when baby comes its smooth .
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Sit down and do a parenting plan get it taken care of now
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Nah go ahead and take it to the police. That’s some serious red flags/warning signs.
He’s trying to push her into a relationship because they have a kid together. And y’all want to encourage that? Wtf?!
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Its possible to coparent. I do really well with both the dads. One did not want to be broke up n hes my favorite to coparent with. I’d do 50 50 no child support unless dad isn’t helping at all. Both the guys take their time and help when I need a sitter. Most guys will say well why am I doing extra if I’m paying you and they do have a point. I’d sit down and figure out how coparenting is going to work and just make it clear although you wont be together you can make this work
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Some of you think his behavior is normal? 
She NEVER said he couldn’t see his child. She said she does NOT want to be with him. He keeps texting her telling her he wants to work their family out. Then he threatens to take her to court and have the child away because she doesn’t want to be with him. IMO, he seems more interested in her then his child. Far too often we see women use kids as pawns to hurt the father but sometimes men use kids as pawns to stay in the mother’s life. See she’s in a tough spot. If she invites him to come with her to doctor’s appointments or anything that has to do with the baby, he might take that as invitation to them getting back together.
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You don’t have to be with him but he has a right to that baby and to be in the babies life.
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Let voicemail screen calls unless u know its’ someone u want 2 talk 2. This is harassment- get a restraining order against contact & tell police that all child-related dialogue will be in a court of law.
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Keep a record of his harassment. 9/10 courts will not take child from mother. They will establish paternity and he will get time with child if his. You don’t have to be with him romantically but understand that he’s still the child’s father and has rights. He’s tryna use the child to scare you into a relationship, hold your ground.
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And you got pregnant why?
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If he is a good guy all around you do not need to be with him but you could have the decency to allow him to be involved . Count your lucky stars he wants to be . It could be good for you to have mental and emotional support
I don’t see her refusing to coparent, I see a women refusing to be in a relationship that she doesn’t want to be in. He isn’t texting her about the child, he’s trying to pressure her into working it out. We have no idea what led to her leaving him and feeling this way, nor does she have to explain it to us. She doesn’t want to be in a relationship with him and she doesn’t owe it to him either because she is pregnant with his child. Unless it has to do with their child, I see no reason why he should contact her and continually harass her. I’d keep record of everything that he says, especially the threat of taking full custody because you don’t want to be in a relationship. She literally said she tried to keep him updated on their baby and he took it as her leading him on. He is the issue here
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As someone who has been in this situation, yeah we all make mistakes and sometimes sleep with the wrong people. 
if he wants to be apart of the child’s life and y’all aren’t together you can decide if you want it to go the legal route of the courts (which is okay and protects you and baby if you don’t feel comfortable). Or you can decide after baby is born a schedule that works for you both. As for him taking the baby away? Yeah… no. Courts won’t do that unless they see you as really unfit. He doesn’t need to be at appointments or birth, you can try to co-parent after the baby is born. It’s great if he wants to step up, but he shouldn’t have to be with you to do so. Mine was a little severe in the fact I wanted the sperm donor to never be able to be around us or see his face again. So I did something to make sure of that.
So whats the question? Go to court
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You’re wrong for this. This is his child also. Regardless of your feeling for the man, if he wants to be part of his child’s life (which includes the pregnancy) he should be able to. So many men don’t care, appreciate this and his support.
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Tell him after the child is born that him and the 10 other guys can submit their DNA to establish paternity but until then you dont want to hear from his stalker ass
This guy is creepy. I’m concerned for your safety.
Get a restraining order ASAP
Change your phone number
Contact an attorney or legal aide for advice.
You have two choices: either call an attorney or terminate the pregnancy. You need legal protection here. It sounds like the father is trying to manipulate you into returning to him. This is a horrible, emotionally abusive situation. But the reality is that if you have the baby, he’ll be in both of your lives for at least 18 years. Emotional abuse can escalate.
Please call a family attorney immediately. The initial consultation is usually free and can be done by phone.
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You can always get a restraining ordet
Change your cell #…Get a restraining order…
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Until a DNA is established he has no rights. Paternity and Child support need to be established. He can say that he’s gonna do all of these things but he’s just blowing smoke up your ass. My best advice to you every time he texts you I don’t know if you have the option but on an iPhone you can block that number I would just continue to block him on everything and do not reply to him if you can change your phone number you should do that too.
She didn’t say anything about not letting him see the kids. She stated she doesn’t want a relationship with the father. The father is constantly harrasing her to be with him. Get a restraining order. Show proof & keep all voicemails he leaves showing that he is constantly harassing you.
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Let him take you to court, save/screenshot the texts, and just ignore him. Keep your phone on silent and look at your phone a few times to make sure no one important called or text. Leave him on read. Let him shoot himself in the foot by continuing harassment. Also get a restraining order as well.
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He is toxic af. You may need to seek legal action.
See an attorney familiar with custody issues and stalking, harassment issues
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Absolutely absurd. You need help one way or another
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I would take legal action to get the best advice. If he’s already acting this way I may not even put his name on the birth certificate. Change your number or block all the numbers he’s using
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Jesus.
What a situation to bring a child into.
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Tell him to get lost
I’m scared. I gotta stop watching crime shows but strap up 
please girl some people don’t have anything to lose
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From here on out change your number, make an email he is allowed to contact you at that way you can sign out, and you can still communicate if you wish, and always speak to him like a judge is watching. The last one is probably the most important advice, because you never know what will come up in court.
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Restraining order keep the texts from all apps he will get in trouble with judge
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Have someone take prego test showing negative tell him all the stress caused you to miscarry
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Start a 50/50 custody order the second that child is born. My child’s father and I did that and we have a happy healthy son. No arguments. No yelling. We work together for our son.
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Keep record of all of it and after the baby is born and you go to court present his actions to the judge
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Change your phone number "
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Change your number you most definitely don’t have to be with him nor do you have to reply back to him unless it’s about the kid he is harrasing you and keep all the text he sends you
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It sounds to me like he wants to be there for the baby. Even if you dont want to be in a relationship you should be able to co-parent. Its not fair to him.
Those saying about harassment and restraining orders, thats not realistic. We had a huge issue with lawyers and police involvement for harassment (we had video and voice recording of all of it) and all they said was nothing can be done unless they threaten your life🤷♀️ so i wouldnt waste your time on that front
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They won’t take a baby from mom and just give to dad without cause. He’s full of it.
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Why are you keeping this child ? He sounds dangerous and you sound problematic. Why would you tie yourself to him. Abort and block.
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Dude sounds like a nut job. Be careful and get a restraining order if need be. Also, he’ll never get custody; lucky if he gets supervised visits
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If you didn’t want him in your life then you shouldn’t have had sex and fell pregnant. He has the right to be in his child life and there’s noithing wrong with him wanting to be a family. Poor fellow I reckon he needs to take you to court and he will get access to his child cause at court it’s about what’s best for the child not what best for mum.
Why do people lay down unprotected with people they don’t want to be with 
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Keep all texts send him one stating clear as day “I will not get back with u but if u want I will keep u updated on how baby is doing ect but from here on out if it doesn’t have to do with the baby I will not respond” it makes u look better and if he continues to contact it makes him look bad but only respond if it has to do with baby then do not put on BC go to court asap to astablish custody so he can’t just take baby and make it almost impossible to get baby back
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Tell him you got an abortion 
what’s he gonna do??
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Y’all sound really immature. ApparentlyIt seems as though you are planning on keeping this baby. If the father wants to be involved, then he’ll be involved in some aspect of your life even including the pregnancy. This isn’t just your pregnancy, it is his too.
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This guy is goofy. There is no way the court would give him total custody. Are you currently pregnant with his child? If so, let him know he will have to pay child support. There is no nice way to put it. Tell him to leave you alone at you can put a restraining order on him.
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Keep all conversation records.
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save all your texts…
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This can end badly tell him you had a miscarriage and move away or you will be dealing woth him for the next 18 yrs and reminding him he will have to pay child support and you are not gping to be withhim os how crazy men go overthe edge and hurt women get awah from him
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I would be considering a restraining order and letting him know your going to get one
This dude is NUTS! Sounds like a narcissist and you having his baby, he thinks that means he has control. Block him on any and all platforms, change your number if you have to. At least that way, you’ll have a peaceful pregnancy. Reach out when the baby is here and see if he can be mature at that point. If not, protect yourself and your child… leave him off the birth certificate. If he isn’t named as the father, he can’t claim rights to the child. He would have to petition the court for paternity to establish custody/visitation.
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If you were not interested ; you should not have been in bed with him.
Ugh…
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Oh this is gonna just be a huge problem 
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You both sound immature. Just because ‘you’ don’t want a relationship with him does not mean you should cut him off from seeing his child.
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Let him know you will keep him updated with anything about the baby (which if he wants to be involved you should) and other than that you don’t need to be harassed. Whether he takes you to court or not he will not be able to take away the baby based on just you not wanting to be with him. Just ignore him
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Why would you lay down and make a child with someone you didn’t want to be with, clearly he wants a family. You kind of did lead him on. But he shouldn’t be trying to force you. I don’t know this whole situation just sounds ridiculous.
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Wow, you are fighting over a child who isn’t even born. Sweet as if you don’t want a relationship with him but to stop a man who obviously wants to be a part of his child’s life is wrong!! Can you not approach an older family member to act as a mediator to sort these issues out before the poor child is born. The court road is very long, very expensive and very very painful. This child shouldn’t be used as a pawn in adult squabbles
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Okay wow a lot of shaming going on. Anywho people are allowed to change their minds and can decide what boundaries they want to cross and when. Just because she slept with him and got pregnant doesn’t mean they spoke of being in a relationship at all. He can’t pressure her to be in a relationship with him if that’s not what she wants. If that was the case he could have gone about this entire situation very different. She should most definitely file a harassment complaint if she is feeling she is in danger and get a good lawyer to fight with in court to figure out visitation and mediation if either of them want to co parent amicably. I hope it all works for the child in the end.
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Be nice this can be ugly. Custody court will handle it. Just wait til baby is born he has rights too.
Surely there’s more to this story 
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Well if you.dont wanna be with him why did you tell him you were pregnant?
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Just keep the texts. He won’t be able to just take the baby away.
You need to tell him now how you feel about him and that you do not want to be in a relationship with him.
Do not put him on the birth certificate. Keep your text messages from him! Stand your ground!
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this is a messy situation, I will say dont lie & say you miscarried… he finds out the truth, could set him off… you don’t wanna be with him, you have the right to say no… just proceed with caution & keep him at a distance & be observant…
Put him on paper ask for a non contact order. That easy. Then when baby’s born put him on child support for baby. Let’s see how long he stays lol girl what were you thinking
He sounds crazy. However you could tell him it’ll be best in this situation to be friends. Tell him you guys can BOTH spend time with the baby. Tell him you guys can go meet at a park. Unfortunately whenever court gets involved it gets hard. Tell him you don’t want to be in a relationship but he civil for the baby and that’s it’s.
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Just curious… why did you sleep with him then? Lmfao
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Keep everything through text so you have proof of what he is doing when tou go to court. Don’t cut him off from seeing the child unless he is harming the child, go to court to set up visitation etc. Just let him know you will keep him updated with anything about the baby and to stop harassing you about everything else.
Why did u sleep with him and get pregnant?
He’s trying to make it work as a family , I think your acting selfish over little things .
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He has parental rights, period. Be a good mom & figure it out.
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