I am almost due with my baby boy, and I keep discovering lies that my baby’s father has been telling me throughout our whole relationship. We planned to have our child together and I was very excited because he SEEMED like a very good man and we had been together for a couple of years, so I decided that I was ready to have a child with him… fast forward to me being 8 months along in my pregnancy I discovered he cheated on me… I was absolutely devastated, and I truly believe that I still wouldn’t have known if I stayed off his phone as he wanted but my instincts are always right and I knew that something was off for the past month and I was right, the minute I saw his phone I got all my answers… he obviously was super apologetic towards me and said he would change which he has been, but I’m not sure if it’s just manipulation or if it’s genuine. I do not trust him when he says it only happened once, and with one person, we’re currently separated but still living together, and I’m so torn between working it out or moving with my mom for now. It’s such a tough situation since I’m about to birth my baby so soon. Since finding out about his cheating I just keep coming across more lies that he has told me, such as him only wanting a family with me yet messages between exes say otherwise… he has always had a problem with lying, but I’ve always caught it, but now that I’m discovering more serious lies I wonder if it’s even worth working through, I wanted this family so bad, but he burnt so many bridges with me and him being a pathological liar completely scares me. Would it almost be better to just move out or stay and be a family… I know I want to be the best mom to my son, but I’m afraid that me worrying about my baby dad will distract me from that… I’m only 20 I have no idea what to do
Ultimate betrayal. I’m sorry that happened to you. Although do you really think you’ll ever be able to fully trust or move ahead? Lots wouldn’t. Not me anyways . Hope you find the answers you seek girl
I would go to your family.so you can focus on your baby.
I think when you are young and gonna have a baby, you think no other man will love you. God has a good man for you and He just waiting for you to leave this loser. Do not put him on the birth certificate
Leave him. It may seem hard in the moment but in the end it’s what’s best for you and your child.
Why waste everyone’s time… If you have to ask we all know you ain’t gonna boot him… Stay… They gonna need a clown for the kids b-day parties
Him lying about little things is one thing but turning around and lying about cheating. Nope draw the line there, and along it all you are finding out hes lied about other things. For the sake of your own sanity and for your baby I would move away. Yes he can still.be apart of his sons life.when he straightens himself out but the best thing for you is to move away.
I’ve been in a relationship for 12 years now girl and it’s not easy . I can tell u now tho if he’s lied he’ll do it again. You CAN stay in the relationship, and have drama and argue in front of ur kids and hopefully start again cuz he almost lost u. But it doesn’t mean he won’t if he already has. You can stay and do ur own thing in the relationship too like most ppl (which isn’t really a relationship) for the kids or u can move on. When I was 21 years old and I found out the SAME thing I wished I would have . I was still so young and your probably beautiful still and will find someone to truely respect u starting from scratch
Why do young girls plan for a baby without being married now a days? It’s mind boggling.
Bad blood will always be there. Always. It’s time to leave before your heart gets even more broken.
same thing happened to me but i found out a month after having my daughter. they say they will change but he won’t. i promise. just move in with your mom and co parent. it’s the best for your child and you. wish you the best.
Do you and your kid a favor and move on! I promise you don’t want that headache of trying to raise a child and be a detective all the time over everything he says and does.
Leave him asap. I had the exact same thing happen to me. He kept lying throughout the entire relationship and then became abusive towards me. I wasted 2.5 years of my life being miserable all for the sake of my child. Not worth it
I would be gone. I would not stay with a liar and a cheater. I was divorced at 21 and my son now has a broken heart vs if I had left his father while I was pregnant he wouldn’t be missing the time when we were together because it ultimately didn’t work out anyway.
Go live with your mom , stand up for yourself. Try to stay cordial and let him be involved with the baby but let him feel the pain of missing you.
I would leave so you can focus on being the best mom. If you’re constantly worried/stressed out by him you will not be able to put your best energy in to your son and yourself. I wish you the best! It’s a tough situation but you are young and you will get through it!
Leave. He’s a liar and a cheater. Don’t put yourself through that. It’s way too stressful for you and if you have family that will let you stay with them until you can get on your feet then that’s what I would do. I know that’s hard but he is a liar and if he’s always had issues with lying then it’s not going to stop and I believe once a cheater always a cheater. There’s no reason to keep talking to exes and there’s no reason to cheat, If you’re unhappy you should just leave.
Once the trust is gone thats really hard to get back. I told my husband if I ever find out anything like that I’m just going to leave because for me there’s no coming back from that. I have a hard time trusting people and what’s a relationship without trust? I wouldn’t want to be on my toes all the time or always wondering what he’s doing, where he’s going, who he’s talking to. That’s just too much for me personally.
Sorry you’re going through this and wish you the best
I was married for 8 yrs to someone who lied and cheated, and I never knew because I trusted him. Until the day I caught him, I threw him out and it was the best thing for me and my 2 babies. He is still a liar to this day, 30 yrs later!! You need to do what’s right for you and your baby. The baby comes first. If he truly loves you he will get help and prove it but until then you need to leave and let him fix himself.
Once a cheat always a cheat… Sorry this is happening to you. Ultimately though you have to look out for that precious baby. Do you think you can get passed all the lies and deception? I know I couldn’t if it happened to me. It may be best to move on and not put yourself and baby through that. Tough choices, best of luck!
Honestly, go. If you go through something after baby such as not interested in sexual behaviors, which is common, he can likely do it again because hes not “getting some”. I’m so sorry. Best to leave and be with your mom who will for sure take care of you. He is not worth your time. You will be MUCH happier later.
If you stay you will be teaching your son that it’s ok to be a cheater and a liar .
Maybe some time apart will help you decide. Liars will lie to get you back, though. Only you know if you can trust him or not. Take some time away to think, prepare for baby and do you for a while. Good luck.
Move home. He’s not going to change. It’s going to be significantly harder for you to leave after the baby is here, and he will keep doing what he’s doing.
Get out of this relationship! A leopard never loses their spots, they just change colors!
You have two choices, stay and accept his bad behavior because it wont change or leave
I found out my ex was cheating on me and gave birth to twins the next day. I never let him forget why we have winter instead of spring babies. From experience, leave.
He has shown you who he really is. Leave.
Leave. He won’t change. And any man who can cheat on his pregnant girl, is scum.
Id move in with your mom leave him not worth the bullshit he will always cheat trust is broken it will never be the same i left my oldest sons father after he cheated on me an me an my son are fine i also have a seconde dead beat piece of shit father for my youngest i was so happy thought he be better then the first one what a disappointment that was but i have an amazing man now took awhile but hes amazing step father to my two kids an now expecting his first child leave dont put up with that it doesn’t get better ive been there you can always co parent with him do not need him you deserve better
In this case, Leave. Go stay with your mom.
Leave him! Leave him! You are so young, don’t waste the young years on a liar and a cheater! Sometimes you just gotta go with your gut.
I was with someone for 7yrs n a week before we were to get married, I found out he had 3 kids!
you know what you need to do hun… do you want your son growing up in that environment where mom is just mot happy at all? you will have so much relief by leaving, yes it will be hard but the great thing is you are strong and can do this!!! make sure to file paperwork for child support since you two are not married and let him do what he wants… i have been in the same situation. they dont change!
Leave. Just do what’s best for your child. Not for your baby’s father.
No need to put yourself or your child through that.
He won’t change, and being a PATHOLOGICAL LIAR (you have known this) he will not change.
Good luck to you and your family.
Why is someone laughing at this?
Anyway, you are very young and you should seriously consider leaving him. Once a cheater always a cheater. Too many lies. You still on time to get your life together get a career take good care of your son and don’t look back. It’s not worth it. You will be better of without him. Good luck stay strong. ⚘
Just go. It’ll get worse when baby comes. Take it as a learning experience and don’t let your young heart hurt, don’t take it personally, people like that would do that to anybody. Go to your mom. Give your whole heart to the baby and yourself. And don’t name him after dad. Names mean alot.
Sounds to me like he’s a good manipulator/liar! Go be with your momma, if he truly loves and cares for you he’ll show you! Good luck to you and your baby boy
People dont usually change. You and your child will be better off without him. All that mistrust and stress will be a bad environment foe your baby. AND for you Mom.
Men show their real side when you’re pregnant, and you’ll never forget the way he made you feel while you were carrying his son. Leave before you get even further in. He’s shown his true colors, and you need to put your happiness and your son first.
Leave! Doing the best for you child entails that. He needs to prove himself to you before he gets to be a part of your family. Goodluck.
You need to go. My ex was a pathological liar. I found out he was cheating and had us both pregnant. When I almost lost my child that was it. I left, moved states and never looked back. You can’t change him so if cheating/lying are his MO it’s just going to get worse. Protect the baby and yourself and get out NOW.
LEAVE hes cheated more than once and is full of nothing but lies do you want your son growing up treating women same way
Follow your instincts not your heart.
Get out of there… he doesnt deserve u. Once a cheater always a cheater in my book. N if he has lied about this I bet he has lied about how many people he has slept with. Your life will be full of lies u guys can always co parent n have split custody nothing wrong with that but definitely move with your mom
Move on. Your time is precious and you dont owe him anything. Your baby is more important now. Maybe see a counselor, or attend some divorce classes in order to handle co-parenting with him in the future. Youre more important than his lame excuses and mistakes. He shouldnt have cheated. Period. You gave him a chance.
Go back home ! Your son is your priority now and you must think of him but if u have no trust u have no relationship at all good luck
Once a liar, always a liar.
Seems like you already know the right answer. He won’t stop lying. It’s not always in the best interest of the child for the parents to be together. Happy mama=happy baby. I doubt you will find happiness in a relationship with a liar/cheater…if you do stay with him for whatever reason I’d highly recommend seeking couples counseling.
Once a cheater always a cheater
I’m sorry you’re going through this, but girl, call your mom have her come get your stuff and be done with it! If I would’ve known what I know about my baby daddy when I was Pregnant I would’ve left right then and there. Save yourself the heartache and go back home. It’s going to be crazy at first but you got this momma
Once a cheater always a cheater in my opinion. I would move out, and hope he can be a better father than he is partner.
Breathe and worry about you and your baby not some fuck boy who can’t keep it in his pants.
If he wants to work it out he will prove himself worthy. But honey at the rate you’re describing him/ his issues he won’t change from that because he hasn’t realized what he’s doing is wrong.
It doesn’t matter if he cheated with one person or 20, he cheated. It sounds like he’s being lying to you the entire time and you can’t have a solid relationship built on lies. You should leave because he’s probably never going to tell you the truth. If he wants to be with you, he can cut off contact with the other woman and try to earn your trust back while y’all are living apart. I have a personal story that may be helpful to you but I don’t feel comfortable posting it publicly, you are welcome to private message me if you’d like. Focus on your baby and do what’s best for you both. Be strong. You are so young and you have your whole life ahead of you and you don’t need a crappy man.
I’ve been thru this same thing, he will eventually make you feel as your the one in the wrong in some kind of way. It only will get worse.
I think you already know… you obviously want to leave. And he doesn’t deserve you anyways.
Move on. Staying as a family doesnt always mean that it will be better. My dad and mom stayed together for 14 years and it was horrible.
I’m just getting away from my ex honey once a cheater always a cheater very rare do they change
You just said the magic words “pathological liar” meaning he’s never going to stop lying to you. Move back with tour mom, this is stress you don’t need in your last month of pregnancy. It could put you into early labor and raise your blood pressure too much.
I’d be gone. Go to your mom. Have your baby. Start new. Good luck and I’ll be praying for you.
You dont kno what you want. You cant be separated and still living together. Pick one and move on.
You’re young, I promise you have plenty of time to find better💕 sounds like he never matured
It will distract you and then when your frustrated with him you will get frustrated with everything around you including your baby boy
Leave his lying ass
Leave!! Ain’t worth it! You are too young to but yourself through it!
Go with your mom. Any man that cheats and lies to you while you are pregnant is too selfish to change.
Leave… don’t let him use up all your patience and energy…save it for your baby. I stayed and it just gets worse… You are going to need patience and energy for your baby…and even without the stress . You will be very tired the first few months
Leave! Your young you have plenty of time to settle down with the right person
leave. go with your mom. there is literally 0 reason to stay with a guy like that, and I’m not sure if you have been told this or not, but your job is NOT to rehab damaged men. Don’t put up with his apologies for his ACTIVE choices that hurt you.
If he has lied in the past about other things, I’m sorry it’s just not going to change. And why is he having private conversations about your relationship with his exes?
Also. You are 20 girl! I thought I had everything together at that age. But it’s so true that you have soooo much more maturing and growing up to do and that’s okay(baby will make that happen fast!). Don’t hold yourself back with a guy who truly doesn’t value you in the relationship when you have so much life to live
To me, cheating is a one and we are done. He will just get sneakier about it. Go to your mom for support. Having a child is hard enough, having that child with no support of another is even harder. You say that “you do not trust him”, that should answer what you need to do.
You wanted this family so bad… you have a family. Don’t push them away for him. And there is a future for you and your son with a good man. It just takes time!
Do whatever you think is best for you. Rather that be run or stay. Only you can decide that
I left when my daughter was two months.
You’re asking for opinions on here… So I think you do know what to do. You’re just afraid to. And who wouldn’t be? You’re young, pregnant, possibly facing a future where you’ll be a single parent. I promise you though, you’ll be much happier alone with that baby than you would be with a pathological liar. Don’t waste the energy you cold put towards yourself and your baby on that man.
It’s easier said then done but I think you need to move in with your mom and clear your head. It sounds like if you don’t trust him the relationship is already over.
If you’re checking his phone you shouldn’t be with him…move on.
You said he has always had a problem with lies…but now they are more serious.
What??
Obviously, you knew he was a liar and you chose to stay with him and bring a child into the mix. You can’t really blame him, you knew, you allowed it and now you dont like it.
Good luck!!
If he’s had a problem with lies, all this time. Either you except that he’s always living and it doesn’t matter, and that he’s a cheater , and you’re OK with that.ARE YOU BETTER GO NOW.
I would move in with mom until you can get on your feet. I’m sure your mom would love having you home and helping you and baby when she can. Get the father on child support as soon as your little one is born. There are resources out there that will help single mothers with low income housing, WIC, free healthcare, etc. Take care of yourself by moving out and putting yourself and that munchkin in a stress free loving environment. You deserve more than what the father is providing emotionally and physically. Best of luck mama
Go with you mom. You are worth more and he’s a shitty example of a man to be raising your son
You need to move on and go to your moms. Don’t be with someone who doesn’t respect you. Your son will either grow up to be exactly like him or absolutely hate him, neither are healthy. I know it’s really stressful and bad timing but it’s necessary and you don’t deserve that.
The best thing to do from experience is leave and take care of your child on your own … if he wants to be there for the child he can go arrange it in court. These type of men never change and love to have you as a second option
Leave. Cheaters, in my experience, rarely change. I know it’s scary, but it’s better than staying with a liar and a cheater.
Leave him sweetheart.
You’re only 20 and planned on having a baby unmarried? At this point, forget him, you need to work on you.
They never change… I’ve been with my husband for 14 years and have found out he’s cheated several times and talked to several other women (just busted before it went further)
Do what you think is best for you… If you think it’s best to leave than leave, if you feel it’s best to stay and try to work it out than that’s what you do. We don’t know your whole situation, so it’s up to you to make the best choice for you
GO WITH UR MOM!!! Don’t stay for what u had hoped for or pictured in ur head. If it’s meant to be, one day it will… but not rn. Take care of u and that baby and if he fits into that life then HE will make it happen.
If it were me, I would move in with my mom (even if only for a break). Let you get your head clear and let him decide what he wants. Putting a distance between you will show you more of what he really wants. If jumps right in bed or continues talking with other women, then move on boo. If he bucks up and fights to get you back then there is a real chance he actually cares and might change. But stand your ground and make sure he knows you will not put up with a single lie or anymore cheating AT ALL. If it doesn’t worj out between you and him, but he still tries to be a good father. Let him!
The problem with a liar is when you don’t have “proof” they will make you feel crazy, and try to convince you to deny your instincts.
It is no way to live. You’ll always have questions in the back of your mind.
Say he does change. Could you really trust him? Why would you? Do you want to spend your life waiting for the other shoe to drop?
Co parent and move on. Good luck mama
“He’s always had a problem with lying”. That alone should make you run for the hills, like yesterday! Girl cut your losses and move on, or he’ll turn your life a living hell.
Leave now… If he has always had a problem with lies then that should have been a very big red flag secondly he cheated & he will do it again especially because he thinks you’ll stay (if you actually stay) so he’ll think he can sleep around & still have you at home! Don’t fall for it… You’ll get your happily ever after but definitely not with this man!
To me he obviously isn’t serious about having a child with you so I’d move on
It sounds like you already know what you need/want to do. It’s a tough decision but you already said you want to be the best mom and he will distract you from that… so leave. Hold your head high and do what is best for you and that baby. You are still SO young. Focus on you and doing what you need to for yourself and your babies benefit.
Run:running_man:I went thru the same thing with my kids father and trust me he will not change!!!
There’s nothing wrong with being a single mother girl, i went through it and still standing strong, got engaged to the most wonderful man and he loves my son as his own. It does get better. Good luck
First off please make sure he did not give you or your child any STI’s. Second coming from experience if they cheat once they will again. I would personally leave and just focus on your baby.
Lost me with ‘separated but still living together’…
Obvious answer with the obvious deceit is leave. It will only make it worse by enabling that behavior by staying.
Once they cheat and once they lie they will always cheat and lie but we’ll tell you
that They won’t😕 LEAVE!!
You can love somebody but, not like them enough to be the father of your child. I promise you once a cheater always a cheater. Getting cheaters and pathological Liars do not change they just learn to hide it better! Let him go now and put all of this energy into your baby and be the best mother that you can possibly be!
Get out now. He’s not going to change.
Once a liar, always a liar. Do yourself and your baby a favour and leave him before you’ve a child stuck in the middle of a poisonous relationship.
Move in with your mom until you get on your feet again. Guys like that will never change. Think on the bright side of things. You’re about to have a beautiful son. You don’t need a man to raise a child. You just need good people in your life. Best of luck to you