I’m worried about my 6-year-old getting bullied; any advice on how to address social situations? We were at the beach the other day, and there was a group of kids digging a tunnel. My daughter was curious, and their grandfather noticed and invited her to join. All seemed well until I overheard 2 of the girls saying, “why don’t you go play with those girls over there?” And she said, “but I don’t have any sand toys, and they are little; I’m six and a half.” I instantly felt crushed because the thought of her thinking someone doesn’t like her makes breaks my heart. I went over and asked the girls why they didn’t want her there, and they said, “we’ve had a lot of visitors, and we are trying to build more.” I didn’t want to force anything because maybe their grandfather invited too many other children, so I simply told my daughter we were planning on leaving anyway because we were getting ice cream. I told her in the car, “I hope you know how special you are and how fun you are! It’s their loss, and mommy loves you so much.” My husband thinks if I intervene in the future, she will become dependent on me “saving her.” I see his point, but at the same time, if I have beef with an eight-year-old, mind ya business boo🤣 I’m just looking for advice from other mothers on what I should encourage her to say when she needs to stand up for herself. How could I have handled the situation better? Please be kind♡
Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. I am worried about my 6 year old being bullied: What can I do?
NEVER stop advocating for your child. Ever.
Do exactly what u did.
Good job, momma.
These days unfortunately you need to get involved because kids are so mean and let me tell you girls are a whole another species of their own.
Main thing is NOT to let her get upset about it … that is going to happen thousands of times through life teach her to NOT let her bother her.
Unpopular opinion. But those two little girls had the right to push away visitors. They had the right to ask her to leave their space. By all means stand up for your baby, and remind her she is special and loved. But asking someone to leave your bubble after having enough is not bullying.
U did the right thing by showing ur daughter ur love an uplifting her confidence by telling her she is fun an dont worry how special she is by u telling her these things she will build her self confidence an in life she can lift her head up high by being confident no matter how mean some people will be towards as she gets older in life she will encounter these experiences in life…
U did the right thing as a mom
Such a great job u did keep it up…
Mothers can be a mother an a friend also to there own children
I don’t think they were bullying. But definitely important to let your child know that their special. Unfortunately as she gets older there will be cases of bullying. In school and online. And perhaps lots she won’t even tell you. I’m all for standing up for your kids, but just make sure you teach her to stand up for herself.
You can be the juiciest peach in Georgia but not everyone likes peaches.
I understand your feelings, I’d feel the same way but looking at it from the non emotionally involved outside, rejection sucks but it’s part of life. I don’t see this as bullying. It’s some kids making a choice they’re entitled to make. They had their own groove going and it could have been as simple as they just didn’t want to play with anyone else. I would not have intervened beyond redirecting my kid and pumping up her self esteem. I wouldn’t have questioned the little girls. It probably wasn’t personal
I was getting bullied by age 5 or 6. Back then,adults thought it best to let kids"work it out themselves." I felt abandoned by my parents and unable to stand up for myself. Well guess what, I was bullied for the rest of my school years and into adulthood. I think my life would have been a lot happier if my mom had been a little like you.
She should have asked the girls, if she can play enough if the grandfather invited her. I had that happen to me many times being five years younger then all my Cousins. I just learned to play by myself no harm.
My son experienced this a little bit in kindergarten and although he had his own friends and two best friends in his class he attempted to play with some other kids and they didn’t seem to have an interest in playing with him and didn’t want him sitting with them and I told him not to be sad about it… That those kids just didn’t understand how awesome he was but his friends do and not to worry he’ll make a lot of friends the older he gets.
I think it’s important to let them know that it has nothing to do with them sometimes children just don’t want to share their space or their attention especially with an outsider or someone they don’t know. I don’t think it’s necessarily always bullying I think that it’s also important to teach your child that in situations like that to always try to be a friend and take the time to get to know and play with different kids I always encourage my son that if somebody needs a friend to be a friend if somebody looks like they need somebody to play with go play.
I am a grandparent too. And can easily imaging a kid watching my grandchildren play and thinking it a fine idea to invite other kids to join in
And I also would have forgotten to see if they actually wanted another kid.
We can’t know any thing at all about other’s opinions, reasons, comfort levels etc.
And in 2012 it is vital kids are comfortable saying ‘no.’
‘No’ is not bullying. ‘No’ is boundaries, and knowing what you want.
And lastly those two little girls are just learning to say ‘no.’
was she upset? sounds like they were sick of people been invited to play with their toys and spoke honestly.(as to how they felt-not thinking of how your girl was feeling) I’d just move on if your daughters not upset-if she is explain it wasn’t about her but their feelings-and maybe discuss how she would have dealt with it
Im the same way. My daughter is almost 3. Past few times we’ve gone to the park older kids are physically pushing past her, one telling her they dont want her there getting in her face like they are about to shove her while shes just standing there smiling trying to play too. And ive snapped at every single one. No excuse for kids to be that rude i don’t care. My kid is 2 and knows how to be polite and not mean. In your case they didn’t seem to be bullying just not as friendly as we want. Its hard, we don’t want our kids to feel rejected, sad, bullied, unwanted etc. Lift her up and explain not all kids want to play or be nice. Do what you feel is needed.
Kids learn how to be social form their parents. I teach my kids how to stand up for themselves and others. If you do nothing and expect your kid to figure it out, it may take a turn for the worse.
That wasn’t bullying, they didn’t insult her in anyway, they actually suggested an alternative group for her to have fun with
Children don’t need to play with anyone they don’t want to
I would have done the SAME thing. My daughter has health issues and is chubby. I overheard a couple of little shits at the park calling her fat…or maybe. I’m not sure. They were RIGHT next to us and far be it for me to go momma postal over something that may or may NOT have been said but I was soooo pissed. Took every ounce of my restraint not to Chuck Norris their asses back to the 20th century. Lol We as parents have to learn that kids are fucking cruel…and all we can do as is make our kids feel as safe and loved as possible. You handled this well, mamma.
I’m with you mama. The very thought of my baby girl getting her feelings hurt or being bullied makes me cry. I absolutely dread those days.
Atleast the little girls asked nicely ? That’s not bullying
I have had this type of stuff happen to my daughter in school, I am with you on being a mama bear and always protecting your child. I will always stand up for them… when it happened to her in class I spoke to her teachers. My daughter is 7 now and girls now a day starts having clicks sooner then we did at their age. My thought process was to asses the situation, consult with the adult, in my case her teachers, and she took my input and had kids in her class once a month switch seats so they get to interact with different kids and find a common ground. I always been a social butterfly but my daughter is more of a shy articulate kind, but I try to navigate her to put herself out there. I assure her that I will always try to protect her, love her and tell all the amazing things that I see in her, but at the same time I tell her I won’t always be there so she always needs to speak up, defend herself and always try to do her best and if someone doesn’t like her or wants to play with her, it has nothing to do with her. To always move forward. You teach and they learn the values that you install In your children.
Speaking up for yourself and saying no is not bullying. No child has to play with anybody they don’t want to. They didn’t call her names or get physical. They simply suggested for her to go play with another group nearby. I know the grandfather’s intentions were good but what he should have been done was ask her name and introduce them and then ask if it’s okay for her to join them. When they said no then he could’ve said something like “I’m sorry, sweety, maybe later you guys can play.” And be prepared to crushed because not everyone is liked by everyone.
That’s not bullied, people really throw this word around
Are you serious? You felt it was ok to try and force your child upon others. Go take a seat somewhere!!! Why didn’t you bring your child her own toys to the beach instead of expecting other children to share with your child. If you would have approached my child with that drama you would have left in tears. The entitlement is real out here.
Unfortunately not everyone is going to like your child or want to play with her. Its a fact of life and we must all learn to live with it. I wouldnt say the girls were nasty to your daughter in any way and you were right to reinforce the fact that you love her…but unfortunately we cant always save them hurt
This made me tear up. She’s lucky to have a Mama like you! Don’t ever stop building her up! Your words to her were so beautiful
Your daughter isnt going to get everything she wants. Yes, it’s your daughter, yes it’s sad, you want her to be included in everything because she literally came out of you and is that special to you… but the girls were 8, that’s a difference in kid world. Sometimes our neighbor doesn’t want to play with my son and it did hurt until I realized that he just wanted some space. That’s probably all it is.
I think you handled it pretty good. Also… “If I’m having beef w and 8 y/o mind ya business” cracked my little world up this morning because well same! Lol good luck.
You did great! They need to know mom is always there. She has many years still to learn that most girls are mean but Mama is always there. Ive had my beef with 8 year olds too
Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. I am worried about my 6 year old being bullied: What can I do?
Well I wouldn’t call it bullying for starters that’s far to harsh for the circumstances. The grandad invited her not the kids….if they invited her then was mean fair enough, but the kids coming out with that it’s pretty normal they are doing their own thing kids are like this one min playing happy with a new friend at a park then someone else comes along! So this happens and I wouldn’t take it to heart, id of said come on then let’s got get you a spade & bucket Mum will help you make your own! Or create a distraction! And explain not everyone is nice because the arnt…kids can argue over a stick in a park lol so next time just move on and don’t give it a second thought
I understanding that would be hard to see. That definitely does not fit bullying, in fact it sounds like the girls voiced their feelings of not wanting a stranger to join in (which is totally fair regardless if grandad) rather well. I would chat about what bullying is (someone trying to assert power over another, with intent of harm and repeated) and what’s a one of mean event or simply a disagreement. Also discuss empathy and how to try to see the others point of view. With you reassuring her and providing safety/comfort I’m sure she’ll be just fine
Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. I am worried about my 6 year old being bullied: What can I do?
I’ve always adopted the whole non chalant “their loss” and “not everyone is going to like you and that’s fine” as they got older of course and it’s served them well. I have a speech impaired 7 year old (youngest of 3 girls) and we have to teach them early, love, kindness but also when to walk away and know they’re amazing and it doesn’t matter what anyone else says or does. I wish my Mom had taught me the same, I really do.
Grandpa needs to learn boundaries and not forcing the kids to socialize more than they want to. You should be careful telling her “their loss” and instead tell her it’s a good example of sometimes people just wanna choose who they spend time with and don’t want to meet or entertain someone else and that’s ok and you hope she’s comfortable expressing those boundaries for herself as well. Your daughter wasn’t bullied.
I always told my kids that not everyone will like you and that is ok. You won’t like every one either and that’s ok too. You find your people eventually.
I don’t think it’s considered bullying just because the kids didn’t want her playing with them. I’ve just always told my kids that not everyone likes everyone and that’s ok. Eventually you’ll find someone that you like and likes you back, you’ll become friends… and whenever they have done that… I have to explain that people can have more than one friend as well… whenever they see their friend playing with someone else and not them…
How old were the other girls? My boys are 10 years apart, and while I’m sure they weren’t teenage girls, I can definitely see 10 year olds not wanting to play with a six year old. Or it could be that they were friends/cousins who just wanted to build something themselves. When going to the beach or bay with my kids, I tried to make sure to have one of those mesh laundry bags filled with sand toys to play with and share (Dollar Store for the win!).
I can’t tell if the girls were being snooty and mean, or were they trying to gently say she may have more fun with the little kids?
I think you handled it well, especially if your child was hurt or upset. If the girls were being rude telling her to go away, she could say “You don’t have to be mean, I just wanted to play.” and walk away. Having a 6 year old put them in their place might sting
My husband said to tell your husband,“she’s yalls daughter and yall both should want to save her everytime but also teach her to how to defend herself in timed yall can’t be there to save her but as long as yall can be there than its yalls job to save her as long as she knows how to walk away or self defend herself when yall arnt around than there’s nothing wrong with saving her everytime”,and kids will be kids,some likes to play and share and others don’t while others are taught they can say no and they can,while others are taught its better to play together. parents are suppose to save their children as much as they can but the children also needs to know how to accept no from other kids without feeling like their being mean to them while they also need to learn how to self defend themselves.
I wouldn’t say that’s bullying at all… They politely said they were done playing with other kids and only wanted to build with each other. They even offered another place her to play, and didn’t just tell her to leave. There’s nothing wrong with that, there was no “loss”. It would have been rude/bullying if they were picking at her to get her to leave. Not everybody likes everybody and that’s okay.
How is this bullying?
We don’t know the ages of the other girls, but sounds like they were older. Maybe they didn’t want to play with a random 6 year old.
Or maybe they were friends who wanted to enjoy each other’s company. And not be bothered by a random strange kid.
I don’t try to complicate it, I just tell my kid that some kids are at the park to spend time with their dad or friend(s) and don’t want to play with anyone else, which is completely fine. And some other kid(s) will be happy to play with him.
My kids have been bullied for being mixed or big. They are 95% in height weight and mixed in a majority white school district. Cant change school districts we live in a majority white county in upstate NY. Anyhow if kids cant handle it I usually get involved with parents. If parents cant fix the situation or school district the kids usually end up fighting. I know its not the answer but most of the time the kids end up friends. Actually my middle son who is autistic is best friend with his bully that he beat up. Its a love hate relationship but it works for them. They can be nice at 8am and hate each other by lunch but they stick up for each other.
I teach my kids it’s better to give and help them to receive and show them that by the kids passing a ball to a kid or getting sand toys and then kicking your child out that they still helped and gave something away she gave her time and her energy and prescience away and the Bible said it’s better to give them receive
Acts 20:35
35 In everything I did, I showed you that by this kind of hard work we must help the weak, remembering the words the Lord Jesus himself said: ‘It is more blessed to give than to receive.’ ”
I think we need to be careful with the word “bully” or “bullying” what you described, while upsetting, is not bullying behavior. Everyone needs to have their feelings validated, even the kids who didn’t want to play with your daughter. At 6+, she’s old enough to figure some of these things out on her own. It can be so hard to watch our little ones struggle, but there is absolutely nothing wrong with not wanting to play with someone (especially a stranger).
I’m over protective of my kids but I don’t intervene they are now 6&7. I’ve always told them since they were little that not everyone wants a new friend and no one has to play with them or share their toys. Even though ur daughter may have been invited by the grandpa the kids didn’t invite her. Just like she thought the other kids were too young, those girls might’ve felt the same about her being too young for them. Just because kids are a certain age doesn’t mean they all act at the same level. I am the type of mom to let them work things out on their own and if someone doesn’t want to be their friend it’s ok because there are many other friends to be made!
I dont think this is bullying. This is strangers not clicking. Its different than being made fun of. Sounds like those kids gently asked why she didn’t play with other kids. She didn’t get hurt. I agree that she should ask kids how they feel about her joining. I feel that your response may have made her feel worse about the situation. Kids r resilient. Let her try. And then ask her about her feelings. Teaching her to negatively react and look at others poorly because they didn’t want her to join will only be worse for her. Teach her that we are not always everyone’s cup of tea but someone somewhere is drinking it!
I think that you should have let kids be kids and “mind your own business”. It does suck and it hurts but the girls that didn’t want your child to play didn’t do anything wrong with expressing their BOUNDARIES
Maybe you could teach her to ask the other kids “do you mind if I play with you?”if they say “no” then you can use it as a teachable moment that sometimes others just want their own space and sometimes they want new friends to play? This would give her new skills to be assertive but also develop an understanding that she’s not experiencing rejection or bullying, simply a situation where the children want to play with their current peer group?
So, I agree with everyone above, but I also let my kids know - hey, you don’t even like everybody. There are going to be people who don’t like you for whatever stupid reason and that is their loss, but also doesn’t mean you aren’t awesome… because there are awesome kids out there that you just won’t want to hang out with and they’re cool either way, too.
Sorry, this isn’t bullying! I can only imagine how those girls felt when you approached them about why they didn’t want to play with your daughter. Talk about intimidating!
To be fair the other kids were not bullying her. They were playing peacefully and their grandpa invited a stranger to invade their playing space…. Unwanted. The girls didn’t seem to be being “nasty”… just aloof maybe🤷♀️. Teach your little one to ask if joining is ok, but her some beach sand toys too, and tell her it’s ok to accept a “no” and it’s not the end of the world. Some kids aren’t comfortable with strangers and it’s ok to respect boundaries. She has to learn to navigate the world and mommy and daddy won’t always be there to intervene. Now is a teaching time to set them up with good social skills
I don’t see anything wrong with what you did. She was shown there are always other options to have fun. More importantly, she was shown how much you love her and you explained, which is vital.
Also, if you need a back up, let me know. Gotta give me at least 30 mins for the ibuprofen to kick in tho.
I wouldn’t call that bullying. That just sounds like they were busy playing and didn’t want to stop to talk another child in. Forcing kids to interact isn’t exactly fair to them either, especially total strangers at the park. I’d teach your daughter to ask other kids if she can play and handle rejection if they say no. They don’t always have to want to play with her, inserting yourself in the situation won’t always help either. Teach her some skills for coping with these types of situations and be there to help if someone is truly mean to her. The other children sound like they just set a boundary and politely declined her help with a reason she could understand.
She wasn’t bullied. She was simply asked to play elsewhere.
I feel the same… It is so hard i just always reassure my son. To include and be nice to everyone… And if someone isnt being nice to walk away… But its so hard
Some times kids simply don’t want other visitors and get overwhelmed, I think it would be a good idea to teach her to introduce herself and ask about joing, I teach my 5 year old that. Some kids, at the park for example, ignore her and others will play. It’s apart of independence and life, but asking is also teaching respect, even with kids. We can’t blame kids for being annoyed when they feel they have no choice. If I was a kid and some other kid just came up to me, I’d be annoyed honestly. I have always kept 1 or 2 close friends at a time and like to keep to myself. Others are more social and will talk to any stranger or child. The ones who don’t feel like playing aren’t mean, you just have to teach your daughter to introduce and manners. Had she asked the girls, they would have said something along the lines of they want time alone. And they also gave you a reason, they had been around many kids that day. That’s very overwhelming for them as children and yes can cause frustration or “attitudes” especially when their grandfather clearly gave them no choice of their play space
Life can be cruel. Your daughter needs to experience some things in life without you intervening. Because you aren’t always going to be there. How she reacts to things is important. She needs to know that some people just aren’t nice.
My son has been in that situation, and he’s also been the kid that doesn’t feel like dealing with outsider energy as well. Their just kids, but it’s important to build them up like you are clearly already doing, and I’m betting the grandfather talked to the girls as well.
One example, When my son is with his cousins, he wants them and only them. He feels like he doesn’t see them enough and doesn’t have time to be making additional friends while their around
I get it, my daughter is two and likes being around other kids. My friends kids were all playing and one of them walked by and I said “oh do you wanna say hi to her?” And they said “no”. Super silly but it did make me feel some type of way. Unfortunately I realized not everyone will like your kid, it is hard to accept but I feel like as long as they know mom and dad love them, they’ll be okay you are a great mama for caring
That’s not bullying… not everyone has to play together or share their toys. Next time be sure to pack some too.
Just like we preach no bullying & teach our kids how to be kind to one another, share, etc., it’s also our job to teach them boundaries of others. I don’t think anything is wrong with how the other girls addressed the situation & you actually did a good job by redirecting her to another activity so she didn’t have much time to sit & think about why they didn’t want her playing with them.
If you want to make this a teachable moment & really equip your daughter for future encounters, teach her self awareness. Learn to recognize when she might be overstepping her bounds despite an adult inviting her to join. Learning to take social cues will help her well into adulthood. After all, she was a stranger to those girls & who knows how many other kids the Grandfather pushed on them. Perhaps they were cousins that rarely get to see each other & had really been looking forward to some play time together. I’ve been the family on the beach where a stranger joins & takes over what had been planned to be built or perhaps even the favorite shovel or sand toy. I’m not trying to be harsh, but it will really help you on this parenting journey if you learn that not everyone is going to love your child the way you do. This is true of adults & other children. Help build confidence & that will serve her much better than Mom stepping in when the world doesn’t go according to her plan.
Be careful with using the word bully. That may confuse your daughter into thinking that everytime she says no to someone, that she’s being a bully and that’s not good.
I tell my 6 year old that not everyone will be you friend and you don’t have to be everyone’s friend. Always be kind, and polite, and honest, but never feel you have to be friends with everyone.
She wasn’t bullied, she was just told no
Take your own bucket spade the lot an see how many flock around to play with her
I would have done JUST that! And made sure the other kids heard me say something about going to get ice cream cause she was so good when they were mean!
Kids are humans - not all humans will click. I’m a firm believer that not all children need to play together just because they’re children. They should be allowed to say no and set boundaries. With that being said, I think those girls were rude about it but children are often rude … and it doesn’t seem like their grandfather corrected them so that’s very likely the problem right there. Use it as a life lesson.
It’s important to teach children that not everyone will like them and that they won’t befriend or even be able to be cordial with everyone they meet in life.
Teach her that their “no” doesn’t have anything to do with her and that it doesn’t have to ruin the rest of her day. If you teach her to let that stuff roll off of her shoulder, she’ll be able to better navigate and handle it in the future.
Also … be careful with your emotions in these situations. Children can often pick up on and feed off of our emotions and what wouldn’t have been a big deal to them originally becomes a big deal. I’m not saying you overreacted at all … it can be hard watching our littles be rejected. It’s all a learning experience though. Watching them navigate their emotions in a positive way through these type of situations is such an awesome feeling.
I don’t see this as bullying. It’s a taste of the real world even though it heartbreaking. I’d of wanted to pull the other kids head off but our children need to realise that not everyone in the world is nicey nicey.
Works both ways though. Eg sharing. If my child has a bag of sweets or a toy on the park and other children ask for one or a go… they shouldn’t be made to share with strangers. I can’t remember last time I was stood at a bus stop and expected the stranger lady next to me to share her crisps. Lessons to be learned both way I suppose.
In a perfect world the lady would offer everyone at the bus stop a crisp but it’s not reality!
I’d always want my child to know they could depend on me for anything. The world is too full of bullies and not enough people standing up to them. My daughters, and my boys went to the school one day, to play ball. Some bigger boy was down there and took their ball, taunting them and wouldn’t give it back, she called me crying. I work nightshift and I went down, looking like hell and made them give the ball back I also educated them on bullying and how serious it is, and that I am a mother that will not put up with it. If I won’t tolerate it with my own kids, I won’t tolerate it from someone else’s. The world is too full of hate and not enough love. You did the right thing mama.
This would make me so sad too I’m worried about when my 4 yr old starts school for the same reasons kids can be mean.
If you treat it like its a big deal she will too.Tell her some children don’t want to play with people they don’t know not to worry time fir ice cream.Its so easy for us to get all protective I know but play it down and it won’t be an issue.
I don’t get into kid disagreements. They’re 10 and 15 and somehow figured it out themselves.
Of course u would save her. She’s ur daughter. U will save her for the rest of ur life
Is the grandpa a creeper?
Put them in karate classes
It seems to me that your personal insecurities are being projected on to your daughter. While kids shouldn’t bully or be mean they do have a right to say no or not right now. Teaching your child she won’t be liked by everyone is a valuable life lesson.
That’s not bullying. People are going to like and dislike you, it hurts but that’s life. As long as they’re not being cruel, I wouldn’t worry about it
He is right.
I 110% understand you too though! That’s your baby, and why the hell would anyone not want to play with her?!
I don’t intervene. I do talk to my kids afterwards and see how they feel, validate their feelings, and then tell them a few awesome things about themselves. Not everyone will like them, and that is ok! As long as it doesn’t turn into bullying. Then that’s when the “defend yourself “ conversation comes in.
This def wasent bulling u can’t force kids to want to play togeather seems like u was the one who had the problem ur daughter didn’t sound like she even got upset or seemd botherd by any of it i dnt think u should make a big deal if it happens again do u hang out with every adult u see im sure u have pacific friends also and for kids it’s no different
I don’t think that was bullying. There will be kids that just don’t want to play with other kids… it will be the same as we grow up. But they weren’t pushing her around and calling her names. My son was getting bullied at school. I lit a fire under that school and the administration because that should be a safe place…and now my 9 year old is throwing up from anxiety over going… how can I make him after that? That boy was suspended. A 9 year old suspended for bullying… that’s learned at home. I eventually taught my son to stand up for himself because he’s no body’s door mat.
It’s okay for kids to not like your kid, and it’s okay to let your kid to know they won’t always be liked. What matters here they know they’re loved regardless and they will find people who will want their company. People who don’t want their company at first, isn’t a good place to start making friends.
Life is full of these situations… life is hard… and if we continue to buy thier emotions or pity poo them… it’s going to be very hard as adults… life can be hard… teaching her… no matter what… her self worth is amazing despite ass hats… is the best lesson
It’s hard but kids also need to learn that not all kids will welcome them in to their circle and that’s fine. They are young kids you can’t be mad at them. You need to teach your daughter be strong and independent and no not everyone is for her.
This is not bullying. And its super weird you talked to those gurls like that.
My daughter is 3… Super friendly and loves Everyone.
Our neighbor has a 8yr old boy… My daughter always says hiii and He says hi back…well he was with a friend and my daughter said hi to them Every time they ran by our yard. His friend passes by and i hear him say " ugh shes so annoying". My heart sank. I wanted to be like and you’re a %*×÷÷;#_÷$…!.## but hes like 9yrs old then i remembered she doesn’t know what annoying means because i dont use that word around her so her feelings weren’t hurt.
I guess teach kids to be tough because we cannot be with them 24/7 especially when they start school. I always teach my daughter to be kind and that’s all i can do. If she comes to me and tell me someone is being mean to her… That’s when i will intervene.
I can completely understand wanting to protect your child from having their feelings hurt, I am a mom of 4(3 boys and a girl). I wouldn’t even go as far to say they didn’t like your daughter, they just met her. They genuinely just wanted to play with each other. I would just explain that not everyone is going to want to play or share with them and that’s ok. Explaining boundaries and helping children understand how to set them in a healthy manner can be a bit tricky at times.
I teach my kids to respect boundaries when someone don’t want them around. But if someone is mean and rude to my kid. Yeah it’s beef for me as well. You can ask for someone to go away but don’t pick at my child
I personally think you handled it well I make it a point to tell my daughter that not everybody is gonna wanna be her friend or play with her an that’s ok she is still smart fun beautiful an will meet many other people in her life so don’t worry an it usually works for us
You coulda just said “Come on baby. I don’t want you to play with those hateful little girls. And shame on their grandpa from allowing them to act that way. We’re going for ice cream.”.
I think you did great! I had to intervene with my daughters bullies when she was in 8th grade. They bullied her for months verbally, and mentally. But when it became physical I lost it! I went to the police station to press charges against these kids as I knew their names. Then I went to the school and spoke with the principal who suspended the kids and told them I had pressed charges against them. It ended there thank goodness and they left her alone. Sometimes our kids need us to intervene, because they just don’t know what to do about a situation. I think you did good momma!
Your not gonna be there to save her all the time, if they didnt want to play with her thats their choice! I dont see how them letting her know there was some other kids to play with bullying! Just let your child know that not everyone is gonna want to be her friend and thats ok because there are some kids she dont need to be friends with. No parent wants their child’s feelings to be hurt but unfortunately its a part of life that is just gonna happen.
It is literally our job as parents to intervene and help and teach out kids how to interact. Leaving them to figure it out on their own is how dysfunction and problematic relationship skills are created!
I could have written this myself. I get so heartbroken when other kids don’t want to play with my daughter.
Be kind because you’re a Helicopter Mom?? Being rejected is part of life. Not EVERYONE has to ‘like’ you or your kid. Deal. With. It.
My kids don’t have to share with someone they don’t know x
Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. I am worried about my 6 year old being bullied: What can I do?
Didnt seem like bullying to me … not all kids want to play with everyother kid all the time im not sure why thats bad . You dont want to have to socialize with every adult all the time do you ? Does that mean your bullying other adults .
I would just tell her if anyone bullies her that she should tell you if she needs help and together you will make a plan, because as she gets older kids will use that against her as well. I just say ignore them other people’s thoughts are none of my business and keep moving on.
I think you successfully distracted her probable trail of thought and in a roundabout way she actually stood her ground with her logical reply she’s got this
I’ve had similar happen with my son, I just explained to him that some kids aren’t as social as he is (he doesn’t have any issues with making friends or playing with new kids, so sometimes he doesn’t understand/remember that not all kids are like him and that’s fine)