They were not bullying her they just didn’t want to play with her or they just didn’t get along with her. Not all kids get along. You did fine by redirecting her.
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I think you did an amazing job boosting her up! You did not intervene where intervention wasnt needed! This is my biggest fear as well as my daughter is super sweet and fear she’ll easily be bullied. We don’t have all the answers as parents, we learn as we go. But from where i stand i think what you did was just enough!
What is described here isn’t bullying. Your daughter needs to learn that not everyone is going to want to play with her. And that’s ok bc she’s not always going to play with someone else either.
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I would just say not everyone wants to socialize and meet new people, and that’s okay. There’s introverts, extroverts. Some people don’t feel like meeting others, forming friendships all the time and what not. Perfectly fine! What matters is what’s said and how they go about it!
The little girls explained they had tons of visitors. That’s okay to just want to be with one other person and do things together without being bothered! I don’t think them spending time together doing what they wanted is a loss because they wanted to keep to themselves. They didn’t do anything wrong, and your daughter should know that instead of thinking they’re losing out. I don’t think they were trying to be mean, if they were bullying her and being rude yeah they are missing out on making future friends, or being good friends you know?
It always bothered me when my mom would try to boast me by saying they’re losing out, they’re jealous, they’re bad. When really they’re just people too? 
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Let her know so it’s ok if someone don’t like her or don’t want to play the world is ugly kids are cruel I don’t sugarcoat nothing to both my daughters I tell them so they can expect this to happen and not be sensitive to it 
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My son has a friend one year older than him who comes over at least twice a week and Majority of the time (more so when she gets to our house and when she’s had enough playing at the end of the day) she’s telling my son, “I don’t want to play with you” “stop talking to me”
“I don’t want to sit with you” “leave me alone” when all he wants to do is play a game. sometimes its like hearing nails on a chalkboard, and I just want to ask her why she’s being so rude to him. But I realize that its alright to not want to share your space with another person or more than one. There are some days when I am the SAME way. I proceed to tell him “its all right buddy, give her some space and maybe she’ll come around” or “honey she doesn’t seem like she wants to spend time with you right now, how about you go do this with me instead, I’d love your company” and she usually will come around and join us. I don’t see it as them bullying her. I see two little girls over stimulated from “lots of visitors” and they were taught the social skills to tell her as well as you exactly how their feeling.
I also Don’t see anything wrong with you saying you’re leaving anyways for ice cream. I probably would have said the same thing to my son. Not only to destract him but to cheer him up because he is my baby and we’re human! We don’t want our babies feeling sad. That doesn’t mean you bullied an eight year old though 
geeze. In that moment it wasn’t about those girls anymore. It was about you making your girl feel good. AND YOU DID 
I think next time instead of saying “their loss” maybe try something like “they didn’t want to share their space with anymore people right then, and that’s okay” followed by giving her an example of when she doesn’t want to share her space.
It sucks that you asked for kindness and yet some people just can’t help themselves but to just be mean and nasty. I hope you get what the answer you’re looking for. Your girl is lucky to have a mama who cares so much 
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Its sounds more like you were offended that some kids didnt want to play with your daughter because they wanted their alone time and wasnt mean to her about it. My opinion but I feel like your showing her that she should be bothered by poeple who want their own space. And as she grows older shes not going to respect that persons space and probably think they’re pushing her away or dont like her.
Something similar happened to me the other day. My 6 year old was at the park and a group of girls came up to him and one of them was calling him a bad boy and telling him he didn’t have eyebrows. Lol 
(He does, they’re just so light that you can’t see them very well) Anyway, my sweet boy kept trying to convince everyone that he was a good boy and that he always used his manners 
I just felt so hurt for him. Lol
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I would do the same as you. I’m defending my daughter to the fullest, I don’t care how old they are. They better be nice to my baby 
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Its perfect that you show her love. Don’t ever stop trying to make your child know how important they are and how mean ppl can sometimes be
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Seriously ‘loss’? Its like your passively trying to say that those girls doesnt really want her around. Do it in a positive way.
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I would do the same for my daughters,I won’t be able to stand any one bullying or saying harsh words to them 
but always encourage them to be independent n know their worth 
I’m so sorry you had to experience this with your daughter, however I do agree with you having beef with an eight year old 
#mommabear #dontplay
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Ah shame mommy, as long you always reassure her she is worthy she is needed so when she gets rejected outside it’s not that bad.
That wasn’t bullying and please don’t misuse that word.
I know it hurts when a child doesn’t want to play with your child but its life and your child will be ok and learn how to handle it. There are also going to be times when your own child will not want to play with another kid and I don’t believe you should try and force it nor think she is a bully for it.
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I don’t see this situation as bullying. Them girls were just being honest and wanted to be left alone. Which is fine and ok. Would you make your daughter play with others if she just wanted to play alone? Don’t you want to be left alone at times? I personally feel your daughter handled that situation better then you. She answered their question and continued to play until you came in questioning them girls. Your daughter won’t like everyone and everyone won’t like her. That’s all ok and is life. It’s not bullying bc you wanna be alone don’t wanna play don’t like you or don’t wanna share. It’s your feelings and ALL children should be able to Express them without being judged as a bully or a mean kid.
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The reality is, you “intervening” SHOWED her what she can do, ask why, get your answer and move on and celebrate yourself! Kids learn best by watching, not by listening. So I think you did the right thing and can encourage her in the future to try herself but remind her that you’re always there.
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What part was bullying? I must have missed it.
Only bullying I seen was you trying to make the other kid jealous by saying you are taking yours to get ice cream. How does it feel to bully a 8 yr old? You must be proud. 
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Well, to begin with, your kid doesn’t need to stand up for herself, her parents should explain to her that not everyone is going to like her or want to play with her or want to meet her and that’s perfectly normal and fine and it has to be respected… We all get rejected and we move on and we grow stronger, you’re overreacting big time… she should stand up for heraelf when she’s directly attacked, not when she’s dissed…
I dont see it as them bullying her because you didnt say anything that would strike me that would simply harm your little girl it’s just kids being kids and speaking my neighbors say the same to my daughter shes 4 and she says the same if she doesn’t want to play with them or they don’t want to play with her I tell her she or they don’t have to the girls were nice about the situtation unless they were talking nasty about your child then theres a problem or calling her names but not all kids are going to want to play with others I wouldn’t stress it again unless she was bothered by it dont make it a big deal if shes not just show her how to speak on her behalf and defend herself
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I can absolutely see why it hurt you as her Momma, but I promise you, that was not bullying. That was a couple of 8 year olds trying to set boundaries when their grandfather wouldn’t do it for them. They are entitled to their space and their toys without other kids infringing. There may very well come a time when your daughter is the one who wants her space while some other kid won’t go away, and her only choice is to accept something she doesn’t want, or speak up.
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I went through the same thing. My mom gave me the best advice at 6 
Little buttholes grow up to be bigger ones she also put me in sports and programs and the right friends came to me. I totally understand having beef with kids. I hope your daughter realizes how special she is 
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NO ONE SAID THE DAUGHTER WAS BULLIED, SHE SAID SHE WAS WORRIED ABOUT HER DAUGHTER GETTING BULLIED
tell her like I tell mine, plain and simple, kids are assholes. All of them. Haven’t met one nice one yet. Every kid in my kids classes have been rude and ignorant af. So, my kids just started telling them to fk off and leave them the fk alone. Which is fine with me. My son was bullied by one kid for the last three years, well at the end of school in May of this yr he finally stood up for himself and punched the little ahole back. (Trust me I told him to do worse)
There is one thing I will not tolerate, and that is a bully. My kids have my full permission to use any means necessary to keep them away from them.
So if she ever does get bullied, please let her know she can use any force necessary to stand up for herself, and not all kids are nice and friendly.
I’m currently undergoing counselling and part of that I did an online parenting course. I also jumped in to save my daughter because my heart broke at any thought of that (she’s 7) however what you need to remember and believe me this has taken a lot for me to do is you are not preparing them for the real world. I’m life people can be mean and we won’t be there to save them so we need to build resilience and emotional intelligence. Not to say if relentless bullying g at school is happening you don’t step in because absolutely you do!!! But also as I was told to remember the old sticks and stones may break my bones but names will never hurt me. Good luck x
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She wasn’t bullied…the other kids just didn’t want to play with her; they weren’t even mean in telling her that. Instead of prematurely bringing up and worrying about bullying, teach your child to be comfortable with herself. Kids shouldn’t have to play with someone they don’t want to and kids aren’t going to like every other kid they meet, that’s just life. Instead of immediately crying “bullying” and playing the victim, teach your child that not everyone is going to want to play with her or like her and teach her that it’s ok to be that way.
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That does not sound like bullying…
If someone asks you to go out Friday night and you say “no thanks, but how about you ask so-and-so”, are you a bully? Are you gonna teach your child they must say yes to every request, whether she wants to spend time with that person or not? Are you going to make her play with the kid that is taking her toys and making her feel uncomfortable? Or is she going to be allowed to say NO to situations she does not want to be in?
Bullying would have been if they punched her down and kicked sand at her. Simply saying “we don’t want to play with you” is a choice they are allowed to make. Teach your child they are entitled to their own choices, whom they spend their time with, self worth. And teach her that other people are allowed to say no, the same as she is.
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No one was bullied… the girls just got tired of so many kids coming over with them…
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Also at that Age I think it’s very common to only want to play with one friend at a time
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If it’s anyone’s fault, it’s the grandfather for inviting kids without asking the kids with him if it was OK. And what was said to her wasn’t bullying, but I get your instinct to jump in. When your child isn’t wanted, it hurts. You should also get her some beach toys so that she can build something epic and have other kids coming to HER to want to check it out.
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I’m going to try to say this as pleasantly as I can. I’m numbering to keep my thoughts in order…not to be hateful.
First That example is not a case of bullying. Think about yourself as an adult. How many people you encounter
…when you go to a store or you deal with the school or go to work.
Do you invite them to…walk around the store with you? Do you invite them all for Christmas or thanksgiving or birthday parties? Do you offer to share your xyz that you’re buying or using? Did you invite them to go to the beach with you?
No. You don’t know them all. Some of them even if your cordial to them you don’t know or like them on a personal level to invite them to those kind of things.
And. That’s. Ok.
We think of kids as being so different because their kids.
And to a point that’s a correct way of thinking…they do play with “strangers” often and invite them into games and such but only to a point.
One day your daughter is going to be friends with someone… They’re going to be playing and doing something important to them and they’re not going to want a younger child they don’t know to join in.
It’s not to be mean in any way…it’s not because they don’t like the other child…they won’t know the other child to like or not like them.
It’s because they are having a moment together with themselves that’s special to them.
Their grandfather didn’t ask them. Just invited your daughter in to play with them and their toys with no regards for their feelings. So they attempted to set thier own boundaries.
My oldest kiddo is 8. My youngest kiddo is 3. Now. Playdates for my oldest… my youngest has to tag along. But when my oldest and his friend ask for space from the youngest I try to give it to them where I can. Occasionally it’s not possible because this is my youngest kids home too. I can’t just boot him out from his own things…but I try to do what I can.
My oldest kid doesn’t hate the youngest and neither does his friend.
And while I’m not always thrilled with how he goes about asking it’s not out of meanness.
It’s him wanting to enjoy his playdate without his little brother tagging along for every little thing.
Second. While I think it was great of you to build your child up. Really. Letting you know her you love her and she didn’t do anything wrong was great. But aside from that don’t do it in a way that sets her up with unrealistic expectations of other people…
Which means in those situations you need to check yourself before you open your mouth…especially to other children that don’t belong to you.
They asked your daughter. They didn’t boss her. They didn’t call her names. They didn’t take things out of her hands. They didn’t get any kind of physically aggressive. They weren’t actually bullying her.
Yet here you sit labeling them as bullies.
That’s not ok. Your child cannot avoid getting her feelings hurt for her entire life. You cannot label Everytime her feelings get hurt as bullying. All you’re going to do is make her a perpetual victim.
That’s not fair to her and that’s not fair to the other kids who interact with her.
Three. Had it been me? I’d have watched closely but left it alone. That was a situation they needed to try sort out amongst themselves. I’d have only intervened if they became nasty or my child became nasty or started melting down.
Next time. Take your child some toys. Watch how many kids come over to play. And watch your child when she gets tired of it after a while. What are you going to do then? Are you going to force her to continue playing with a slew of kids she doesn’t know? Or are you going to let her set boundaries for herself and her things?
Look. I’m a special needs parent. I’m all about inclusion. Really. My kids birthday party? I wouldn’t let any of the kids do the poppers for a bit because it seriously bothered one of the guests. I asked them (particularly my son because it was his party and the other child was his guest) to do things that this other child enjoyed.
So I’m definitely not saying that it’s ok to just exclude people and be little assholes.
But there’s a difference. You as the adult need to recognize these different situations and address them accordingly.
Question my kid like that we gonna have a issue. Im still re reading to find the bullying i missed
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That isn’t bullying love. Not super inclusive of the other kids and possibly a little hurtful to your daughters feelings but that is nothing close to bullying.
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I get where you’re comin from butttttt at the same timeeee If i bring …say some food to the beach or park where theres other adults am i obligated to share it if asked to? Or to “hang out” with you if you ask me too? No. … Theres no bullying here…at 6 thats how kids are…i have 3…
Stay out of it and let them work it out. In the interim enroll her is a sports of hobby that will give her leadership skills.
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My daughter is also 6 and when it comes to bullying I explain that someone broke the other child’s heart or that they don’t know Jesus the way we do, depending on the situation. Then we diligently pray for the other child together and pray for God to remind us how special my daughter is to him.
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Not bullying. But it’s a little strange that you approached children to question them.
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I think you handled it well. Kids need to learn that they will not fit into everyone’s circle, and that’s ok! You reassured her that she is still loved and wanted in your circle.
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It kills me too but I agree with your husband. Let your daughter work through it. She needs to realize not everyone will be her friend and that’s ok too.
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It’s normal part of growing up, just do what you doing tell her how special she is build her confidence but also tell her that not everyone likes everyone
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Next time, don’t go over and ask little kids why they don’t want to play.
If a kid telling a kid nicely they don’t want to play is bullying to you, then what is a grown woman standing over 2 little girls making then feel intimidated and awkward?
Kids do this and it’s best they leqrn young how to set up boundaries and not be steamrolled for someone else.
I know it’s hard. My son has the same problem. He is 8. But I explain to him that not everyone wants to play and learning how to play by yourself is a good thing anyways.
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Build her up yes, tell her she’s always your baby and all that but you can’t force another child to play with your child or there’ll be resentment and then that opens your daughter up to a world of bullying when you aren’t around to save her. I’m going through this with my 6 year old now. Her sister - 8 years old- who’s been her best friend her whole life is starting to develop her own friends and kids aren’t always the kindest with words.
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she definitely will become dependent on u. dont intervien unless the bullying is getting physical or there name callong. just cause someone doesn wanna play with ur kid doesn mean shes getting bullied. she needs to learn not everyone is going to
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I’m honest and don’t coddle my daughter in these situations. I explain that not everyone is going to like her, that’s ok, we all have different people that we like and don’t. If we all liked each other we all would be pretty boring species and have nothing new to offer the world. I also explain if she wants to do something and someone doesn’t want her there, she can do it to and tell the others to go pound sand in their ass because she has the same right to be their as they do. I do however, teach her that sometimes people need space and it’s all how they ask you to give them space. If they are nice about it, she has to respect that but if they are just being a bully or mean then f*** em. I believe my kids need to learn that it’s ok to not be liked, it’s ok to be different, it’s ok to be rejected, because that’s just part of life, no need to dread on it. Our differences should be embraced by ourselves and don’t need others to justify it. I also don’t save my kid, I tell her no one is going to stand up for better then her standing up for herself. So far, it’s worked and it’s taught my 6 year old to be very independent and even stand up for her brother who’s younger when an older kid told him to get lost.
Your daughter wasn’t bullied. She was playing with kids who did not know her and wanted to do their own thing. That is not bullying. Teach your daughter that it’s OK to not want to play with every kids all the time, that it’s OK to not want to share your toys everytime. That way when other kids don’t want to play with a stranger or share their toys with a stranger she understands it’s not necessarily her they don’t want to play with, they may just not have wanted to share their things and that’s OK. Do you share everything you have with every strange adult that you meet in the park or at the beach? Also teach her that no matter how cool she is, she is not goi g to be everyone’s cup of tea, and that’s OK. We don’t have to be everyone’s friend, quality of friendships is way better than quantity. We should treat people with kindness, we should be tolerant of other people. We should be open to meeting and including new people, but that doesn’t mean we HAVE to be friends with everyone and we HAVE to always share our things with strangers. It’s OK to respect our feelings in any given situation and say no this isn’t working for me I don’t want to do this. If she is able to recognize that in herself, it will be much easier for her to accept in when other kids are doing the same. Also teach her what actual bullying is so that she can recognize the actual mean kids and avoid them and so she knows not to do it herself.
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It’s hard but not everyone will get along and that’s something kids need to learn from a young age! Kids and people of all ages absolutely do not have to get along with everyone that’s not realistic! Didn’t sound like bullying to me either. The girls that turned her down could’ve been really mean and said way worse things. Sounds to me like they actually kept it quite civil for their age🤷
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Let her learn on her own n stay out of it cause it’s kinda odd that u went over n questioned other kids. If they don’t want her to play with them oh well it’s not end of the world n she needs to learn not everybody wants to play with her. Just teach her to be kind that’s all you can do honestly.
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Kids should understand that they have a choice, so does every other kid and if someone doesn’t want to play with them they should just find something else to do. I think it was Daniel Tiger that did a whole show and song about it.
It sounds like they wanted space from too much going on. Maybe they did have a lot of kids in and out and just wanted to do it their way. I don’t think it was a personal thing to your daughter. I would have just said to my kid “they want to finish working on their own right now let’s give them some space “
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Yikes. If you think that’s bullying then buckle up! It’s about to get WAY worse. Teach your daughter to stick up for herself. I teach my boys to do that. If anyone hits them I’ve told them to self defend themselves. My son just just suspended from camp for getting headbutt in the face and hitting the kid back. I told my son that we do suffer consequences for our actions but good job fighting for yourself
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That in my opinion was not bulling. She went to play woth kids who didn’t know her with their toys.
My kids hated that a pools and playgrounds. All the kids wanted to play with their stuff.
I gave them full permission to say yes or no!
Not all Kids are going to want to play or share their toys and that’s ok. Kids need to learn how to handel disappointment.
Also if you have a problem with a kids situation, speak to the adult first.
Little mean and bulling remarks start early, teach them how to deal with it.
Yes if you save her from it every time she will never learn to verbly defend herself. Also all kids should learn self defence in case things get physical.
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Teach your child that not everybody is going to like her/be her friend/want to play with her, and this is OK. As adults, we don’t make friends/hang out with every person we come into contact with. We find our “circle.” That is the real world and the sooner she learns this, the better off she will be.
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Stay out of it, shes learning…
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LOTS and lots of talks about boundaries and how to stand up for herself. Also teaching her that not everyone she tries to make friends with will like her or want her around. Teach her to remove herself from situations like that where she isn’t getting positive energy reciprocated. It will take practice, but she will get it!
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I can actually speak from your husband’s view. I did the same thing, my daughter was very heavy growing up and got bullied a lot. She used the sympathy attention she got from other people and myself when we’d console her. I handled it wrong, I was bullied so bad I cried up into my teen years every morning when I’d get ready for school. No one ever intervened. I’m a strong person now, still bitter though. I didn’t want that for her so I admit I coddled her when it came to those things. She is almost 17 and has the mentality of a 12 year old, sometimes younger( She talks to stuffed animals like they are real etc.) Long long story but she has issues from it, yes she’s in counseling, no it hasn’t helped. Not saying this happens with everyone but I can speak for the opposite side that says it’s okay. Also know the difference in what’s considered bullying. I do not think those girls were trying to be mean on purpose. Maybe they just wanted to play together, especially if a lot of other kids kept interrupting because of grandpa. My daughter got to the point where she told cps I bullied her because I grounded her for not doing her chores. Yes it’s that serious.
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My oldest is 5 and hes insecure about about speech. When he was 2 or 3 we were at McDonald’s playhouse and this little boy said he didnt wanna play cause he couldn’t understand my son. And he continued to ignore him and play with other kids. I have never in my life wanted to smack a child like that in my life ! I obviously didn’t didn’t the urge was there my boy don’t take shit from nobody. Teach her that. Little girls are a rotten breed anyways, tell her to shrug it off and be her own friend until someone else comes along thats worth her time and love!
This is not bullying. It’s 2 girls choosing not to play with a third. They even offered her another option. Bring some sand toys for your daughter next time. 
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I think you did great in making her feel good but also next time I would just say hey baby let’s not play with them ok. Don’t even talk to the other kids or acknowledge them.
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I’d be mad as a mom if another kids mom came up & asked my daughter why she didn’t want to share her toys or play. Im teaching my daughter that she can set her own boundaries.
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Not bullying at all. The other girls simply wanted to be left alone to build and that was being distrupted by other kids wanting to play with thier toys. They tried to redirect her (which was very mature for them) to go play with other kids, that isnt bullying!
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They don’t have to play with your kid. Maybe, as they said, they wanted to just play alone. It’s harsh but not everyone is going to play with your kids or like them.
The children were mean, not thinking it would hurt her feelings, I truly believe they didn’t mean to hurt her. They are young, they have a lot to learn. You are a good mother, and talking to her, reassured her, and it most likely likely helped her not feel so badly, this will in the future, have her trust you, and talk to you about things, that have hurt her, and bother her, and build a stronger bond with you in the future. You didn’t bully the children, like some here state, you asked them, a simple question, you didn’t bully, belittle, harass, call them ugly names, that is bullying, the children didn’t bully your daughter either. As a parent, I would be curious as to know why too. You did nothing wrong.
You shouldn’t intervene unless someone is name calling or being abusive. Other children are not required to play with your child… Honestly, it was strange of you to ask other children why they didn’t want to play with her. I see future issues just like your husband does. Pump the breaks
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I think there is a difference between bullying and simply not wanting to play/share with a stranger.
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Really tough situation for you.
I would have handled it like you
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Anyone thinks this woman bullied these children, by asking a simple question and walking away, has no clue what bullying actually is. So, get yourself educated, before you speak of, what you don’t know.
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Teach her that it’s ok if someone doesn’t want her to play with them. Is she a only child? I’d try to find someone maybe with a girl around her age and have play dates. I teach my 3 children to stand up for themselves and everyone is different not all kids r there friend we just find who our friends are and go from there. However this is not bullying momma if u think that was buckle up buttercup
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I feel like alot of these women don’t remember what it’s like to be little girls… lol. I’ve dealt with alot of them and have two of my own and yes this absolutely can be a form of bullying. I have watched it in action and it is just as hurtful. I think you handled it well and helped her remove herself from a situation that she wasn’t sure how to handle. The next step would be to explain to her that not everyone is going to be nice. Not everyone is going to play with her. That doesn’t make her less than they are or less of what she is. And its okay if they want to exclude you because she will eventually run into people that she doesn’t want to include either. But at the same time it gives your daughter a chance to rise above that because she does know what its like to be excluded. Your job as a parent is to help her deal with situations and teach her so that one day she absolutely can deal with them on her own. Next time hang back and see what she does… what she learned from this interaction. Then adjust from there. There’s a difference between supporting and being domineering… helping to bolster your daughters feelings and showing her how to tactfully remove herself from a situation is part of parenting… plus she’s six… its not like you ran in to a group of teenagers and started questioning them…hopefully by the time she reaches her teenage years you won’t have to because you will have taught her how to deal with a situation like this and she will be fully capable of handling it on her own.
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My girl is 5,very sweet!! She came home crying because the neighbor didn’t want to play,I told her it’s ok,some ppl are not your friends, they had slight issues,but I also told my daughter some ppl are not nice that is not a friend but you stay who you are!! She gets it now!!
She definitely was not getting bullied. It was rude of the grandpa to ask your daughter to join them with out asking them if it was ok. And it’s weird for you to approach them for them for simply asking her to play with someone else. This doesn’t even mean they didn’t like her. You put that into the situation. And even if they didn’t like her you may want to explain that not everyone in life is going to like her or you are really going to set her up for failure. If it were my kids you approached it would have not bothered me if that’s all you did was ask the question but I would have asked my daughters if they would have liked to invite your daughter to play in the first place so that issue would not likely have arose. No one in this story was bullying. That word is really over used these days. No one should be required to play with other kids or share their toys.
Let her learn on her own. Not everything is going to work out the way our children want it to.
She’s gona need to learn on her own. Disappointment is a lesson we all need in life to grow. Unfair is a lesson we need to learn in life to grow. You need to let her fail. So she can pick herself back up.
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No bullying going on here at all. And I’m just going to put this out there, I have a son who looks, talks, and acts like a typical child. But once he’s done playing with others, he’s DONE. He gets over stimulated and it’s hard to process things for him and needs his space and to be alone or with just his sister. So as grown adults we shouldn’t step in unless there’s actual bullying going on. Cause I’d be pissed if a grown woman wanted to question my son for NICELY asking their child to play somewhere else. Just because you can’t see his disability doesn’t mean he don’t have one. Let’s not forget that too ladies and gentlemen! Teach your kids about personal space and boundaries. Be respectful of others and simply walk away. No need to stand over 2 kids who have asked your child to let them play alone and question them. You’d be taught a hard lesson that you need to approach me as the parent and not my child. It’s not ok that your child was asked to play elsewhere but it’s ok that you could have just questioned a special needs child and made them feel like shit cause they don’t fully understand.
I have always taught my kids everyone has a right to space, everyone has a right to say no thank you, and it is never anyone’s job to entertain you. My kids are always taught to be kind, but it is ok to say enough and move on for whatever reason, as long as it is done kindly. My daughter has been bullied at her old school for 2 years. Actually, name called, pushed, teased, and had her own items taken by other kids. This, imo was not being bullied. As moms, we always want to rush in and save. But the truth is, and its a hard one, we have to step back and teach them how to handle it with grace and dignity. I think its wonderful you reminded her how special she is, and it was totally their loss. But she also needs to understand sometimes people need a break, and thats ok too
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It’s hard to stand back and watch them get their feelings hurt BUT it’s part of learning, growing, making friends, and learning how to walk away. Let her decide what to do in the situation as long as she’s not getting physically hurt. The kids either negotiate with the other kids to allow them to stay and play. Or they just get up and leave… sometimes upset, sometimes not. If she wanted to stay, and you left her be, she could have found a way to convince the other girls that she’s should. ‘Can I make the moat?’ Or ‘I’ll go get some more water in the buckets’. Kids are masters at learning how to get what they want. They do it with us parents and they do it with other kids. If you intervene, she’s not going to learn how to handle the situation on her own and believe me, you won’t be there for 90% of these type of interactions during her school years. Be there for her if she gets upset, step in if she’s being abused, but let her figure out how to handle it.
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She stood up for herself,feel proud.When she answered them ,"she didn’t have sand toys’ etc. Don’t worry
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Some of y’all are raising a whole lot of victims and crybabies. The same ones saying these little girls were being mean would be singing another time if it were their child minding their own business and some stranger comes over and asked them why they won’t play with their kids…
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You could have just told your kid, hey come back over here by us and l left it at that. Everything doesn’t have to be an issue, especially for little kids. You became the “bully” standing over someone else’s kids…lol
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What those girls did and said wasn’t bullying though? It sounds like they were actually quite kind actually. I understand that it’s difficult and can be upsetting that others don’t want to play, but the answer to your daughter’s disappointment isn’t to teach her that other girls are obligated to share their time, resources and efforts to make her happy. Sometimes kids don’t want to play with strangers and that’s okay.
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School is way worse and you aren’t there to intervene. She is going to have to learn how to conduct herself in these situations 
Definitely remind her at home how important she is though.
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First this was NOT being Bullied. You really need to change your mindset of what that word really truly means. If you’ve been truly bullied you know this situation does not qualify at all. I have told my boys and the 3 kids I Nanny I do not want them using that word flippantly because it is so over used and just thrown around. If you’re bullied youre bullied but if someone just doesn’t want to be friends or doesn’t like you that’s not being bullied.
Noone is obligated to like anyone and everyone it works both ways. That does not make someone a Bully. I have taught my boys that they can and cannot share with other kids around us but it is 100% up to them. 10/10 times we are the family at the park and lake who has ALL the toys, kayaks, paddle boards, buckets etc so we attract kids who don’t have their own and 8/10 times my boys are all about sharing and playing with other but there are times they just don’t want to share and want to play with the toys themselves and not share with others and they let the others know sorry not at this time.
I think its weird that you asked why she couldn’t play with them. Had I heard someone ask my boys that I would have waited for them to answer which I’m guarantee you my 5yo would tell you because he doesn’t have to or want to and if that didn’t suffice for you I would have told you that Noone is obligated to be your child’s friend or to share with them. I don’t rush to my boys aid 9/10 they handle their own issues with other kids.
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I agree with some of the comments that it isn’t bullying. I’d just explain to my kid that some times kids just want to play by themselves and she can do something else. I remember when I was younger just wanting to do my thing and not have someone new come up and not do it exactly how I wanted it done. The kids are there to enjoy their day and their space if they may not be there a whole lot- bring stuff for your kid to do
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This sounds like your insecurities that you are handing down to her. Those kids weren’t being mean or bullying, how about instead buying her some toys and help her build a sandcastle .
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Simple; you go to the beach- bring your kid her own stuff so other kids will want to approach her to play. You brought her some where with nothing to keep her entertained. Thats on you momma not bullying. I always bring stuff to the beach for my children and if my child wants to play with HER OWN stuff; thats on you momma not an 8 year old grow up and be the adult
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I would of bought her beach toys and taught her to invite others to her spot. Now she’s the queen
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And yes, I think u did right!
So would you want your child to have someone forced at them and they just weren’t comfortable and didn’t want to entertain a stranger? It’s not like you and their adult are on a social level. This happens in adulthood as well. Sad life lesson but perhaps teaches her something. Explain the real possibilities of it. “ well honey, it’s possible that because they don’t know what you, they might feel awkward with a strange person coming into their group… Just as you might at some point. They aren’t saying they don’t like you. They don’t know you. But perhaps they just aren’t comfortable with someone they don’t know.” For the love of God don’t helicopter parent these kinds of situations. Explain the reality of it to her so she understands if it happens again down the road, it’s nothing personal against her. It’s just how some people are with strangers.
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Why do parents think other kids should be forced to play with your kids. Nobody owes you or your kid shit. I don’t know you and I’m not forcing my kids to play with yours. Deal with it.
Hm. I wouldn’t overthink this. Its not bullying at all in my opinion. “You don’t want to play with me fine” attitude needed.
My then 6 year old was looking for a friend at a park, found a girl ask if she wanted to play with her, the girl glared at my girl so mean and frowned and said " I don’t want to" my girl frolicking around and saw me and said “I haven found a friend yet but I will keep tryin” then big… smile… I literally cried lol if I had that sprit growing up, I was golden.
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She did stand up for herself
You’re doing a nice job, We can try to bully proof them and give them self esteem . Teach her to be kind and smile and be there to listen and support her.
Well… I have a 7 year old son that’s bullied. He’s a tad bit overweight, so they pick.on him for that. He was punched multiple times in the face by a child 2 years older than him, resulting in a black eye. That’s bullying. It sucks when other kids don’t want to play with your kid, but that’s life. Just keep telling her she’s special, but that not everyone gets along with everyone else and that’s okay. Not everyone wants to play with everyone and, again, that’s okay. She needs to learn these lessons.
Hello Amy Messer, I’m the mother that created this post. I see you have taken quite an interest in commenting on literally everyone who is remotely understanding of my question. I understand children need to set boundaries and I understand that maybe gramps invited a little too many people. I asked why they didn’t want to play with her in a very warm way because I was trying to help everyone communicate, incase my daughter was doing something that upset them. I asked for advice because I’m trying to be the best mother I can be and nobody is perfect it’s why I believe being supportive of eachother.
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Simply teach your children to be kind. Those girls apparently need to know the meaning of ‘Nice’ spell it & then walk away😊
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And another thing. This beach had many toys to rent there the previous year…body boards, beach chairs, ect. Its a perk of the beach that so many people loved. When we arrived to rent some they said they stopped doing that. Such is life and we had a wonderful time even so! Looking at everyone’s perspectives I can agree this wasn’t bullying so much as it was me worrying it felt that way for my daughter. As I said I am just trying to be the best mother I can be. Aren’t we all? God bless and be kind, because these are real people on the other side of your phone screen.
Back off 
good lord. Cut the umbilical cord already.
They probably didn’t have an issue with her specifically. They most likely just wanted to be by themselves. The problem is, kids don’t have a filter. They lack tact and often just say what they’re thinking. I definitely wouldn’t consider any of what they did or said bullying.
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I know my kids love playing with other kids at beach … sometimes kids are just tired and can say some silly stuff so I always keep an ear out … we are a big family so I know all that comes with kids being kids … lol usually if I hear something other than fun … I make my way over and say I’m ready for an adventure and take my little one’s away and go find sea shells / certain fish or any treasures … they do usually bring toys but I did catch him myself once or twice w/o and kids usually love sharing … so don’t take it to heart … and just keep playing … they won’t think twice about it if we don’t
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You don’t have to save her. You need to teach her it’s okay to leave. It’s okay to leave any situation she’s uncomfortable with. Whether that be digging a tunnel at the beach, a party in her teens that gets out of hand, a job, a date…teach her she can say no. Teach her it’s okay to leave. And if possible, you will be there to help her pick up the pieces after.
I’d teach her to understand that not everyone will want to play with her or be a friend. And that’s ok. Everyone is different. Teach her now that it’s important she be a friend and be nice. But also it is ok to want to be left alone by others too if she isn’t in the mood to play. Teach her emotions are ok and important. But it’s never ok to be outright ugly to someone.
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It’s pretty natural for children to either include or not include others. An unfair part of growing up, for all involved. It’s hardly bullying to just not want to play with someone. Even as adults we don’t include everyone that may approach us to take part in what we are doing. We have expectations for children that we don’t even hold ourselves to. Let nature take it’s course. Everyone has the right to their own space and who is in it.
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I wouldn’t take one incident as a future indicator of her being bullied. In my opinion, what happened wasn’t at all bullying.
Hard for a mommas heart for sure. I think it’s important to teach her that not everyone wants to always play, and especially with new people they don’t know. Take it as a teachable moment for how to make new friends.
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