I can't stop thinking about my ex

I broke up with my partner of 10 years. We have a child together he’s 8 . We wasnt together for a couple of months but we stayed in the same house. He spent most of his time on the ps4 , I would be working providing for him and our son , paying for his car and anything else that needed paying for, food every thing you name it, if I didn’t cook he would get angry , if I cooked for myself he would get angry again , He got lazy and always made excuses about going back to work , he got let go 3 times and was given multiple chances too. Like he’s nice , he’s done stuff for me too, he’s not all bad but in that situation we was struggling so bad trying to make ends meet. Anyways : I met someone amazing , we was talking for a couple of months before we met up , I got pregnant by that other guy real fast .
But sometimes I find myself thinking of my exs , like I even have moments where iv asked for him back , cried , sent him long messages , crying my heart out but he pretty much gave me the seen, shut me down , laughed in my face and talked high about them other girls he’s talking too , he even sent me a picture of someone he really liked , posted stuff about them but when we was together he never once posted me ANYWHERE …
Ohhh and he moved to Australia.
He hasn’t given me any suppose with our son but when I go ask for money he says : he doesn’t have any But he has money for his game.

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Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. I can't stop thinking about my ex - Mamas Uncut

Change is hard. Move on with your life Luke he is with his.

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Why in the world would you want that back? Let it go… don’t put yourself back in a toxic relationship… protect your child at all cost!

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Why would you want to go back to that garbage. Move on and if you want children support take his ass to court. Don’t be stupid.

Seems like you’re missing the memories. Go make new memories with the new man.

I don’t understand the problem you Miss him you want him back Sweetheart he has nothing to offer wake up n protect your child… your child is the only one you owed anything not that looser

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U dont truly want him back its just change and change is hard thats how it looks to me

Why would you want someone back that didn’t care for you or your child? That’s toxic and an unhealthy example for your kid. Be alone until you find a partner worthy of being in your life

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That is man chi?d not a man yr missing g out on nothing. Keep doing good for you and yr son stop talking to that loser let it go

If ur child wrote this what would you say to them x

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I don’t think I read that right…wtf lol, you want him back you say…

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If you’re feeling like this in a new relationship than you need to be single and learn how to heal and love yourself before hopping into new relationships. You’re just gonna carry your pain into new relationships and cause problems for yourself.

You’re slowly letting him go and before it was easier but even though you didn’t want him he was within reach at home when you needed emotional support (even if he didn’t give it to you, we are human, we look for love in people we love) change us hard and it’s the attachment you’re trying to break free from and it’s hurts. In a half a year you won’t feel like this. Sadly you gotta go through the emotions. Just know you deserve better and never settle. One day it will become a habit to never settle for less than you deserve. And you love him. That part doesn’t just go away. We learn to love ourself move and find love in other people and things

Wanting him back makes no sense. He will find out just how bad a controlling life is like by moving to Australia- sounds to me he is about to have some karma for how he treated you. Move on & forget him - you deserve better.

Never let a man tell u he doesn’t want u twice. He moved on u shud do d same

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Wow , he will never change

He sounds like an absolute lazy asshole, and you can’t stop thinking about this guy??? I don’t get it, you need to stop thinking about this fuckin loser and think about your KIDS. Move on and get over it already. I think maybe the only thing you and your ex had in common is sex, you enjoyed sex with him and that’s about it, because what you described of him, he’s a CAPITOL LOSER

A man will only change for who he wants obviously he didn’t care for your feelings let him go. He’s not worth the struggle or a second glance for that matter

Would you like your son to be just like his dad , if not you better make some good changes and examples for him to see .

Sometimes I wonder if these posts are for real :thinking: why would you want to get back together with someone like that? He just seems hella toxic and lazy, you literally did EVERYTHING and sounds like you weren’t appreciated, just focus on your kids and try and get some type of help like child support, good luck to you

I just want to say you are valid in the way you feel :heart: once love is there you will always feel it. I do have to say at this time think with your head and forget your heart. The decisions you make from here on are your own without excuse of him. Protect yourself and most importantly your kiddos.

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Ask ur self why would you want someone like that back?! Because you sound alittle crazy lol he is not worth it! , move on and accept the fact that it is over for ever you deserve someone way better look forward and make awsome memories with ur current partner if you have one.

You miss a loser when u have a good man trying to be in your life?? Go with the 2nd guy and don’t look back! Don’t get me wrong, ur feelings are valid, but it’s still crazy to go back to something/someone u know ain’t gonna change.

He’s a complete loser. I can completely empathize with your feelings because I was in your shoes once- except i actually went back to the guy and i can tell you that it worked for a very short period of time before things became even worse than they were. To reiterate- this guy is a loser. He sounds like he used you and now look at him spending money on everything BUT his family (you and your son you have together). These feelings you have will pass, just don’t give into them. Move on not only for yourself, but for you son and your baby on the way. Stay strong- you deserve someone who appreciates you, respects you, and reciprocates your energy.

Im sure there are plenty more :poop: fish in the ocean, find you one… 🤦

What exactly are you thinking about? He’s irresponsible and petty and not a good Dad. Sounds like he’s worth forgetting.

Leave that don’t give a damn along and live your best life

Sounds to me your in love with a piece of shit. Should be pretty easy to figure that out. Sorry to be straight forward. Women think they can change a man but really they can’t.

And why exactly do you want him back?

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Although I had trouble reading your post I got the basics.It maybe because he found some one else or you were comfortable.Bottom line though.He has a responsibility to your child.Let go of the anger,you moved on so did he.You know how to get under each other’s skin after 10years.Its not healthy for your children to go back and forth.Build to co parent and let the rest go.

You miss the idea of the family you had but the reality of what you had isn’t what you really want or need.
You’ll have moments of ‘what ifs’ and ‘well maybe this time’ etc etc but that’s just your desire for that true family unit and to have it with the one you once wanted nothing less with… BUT you KNOW deep down he is not the man that you need nor want as your life partner or as a role model for your son either. You have got this, remembering the good bits is nice but it does make us list for it back but remember what it turned into and what to know you need and deserve xx

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Why do you wanna be with a straight loser? Work on your self esteem and stupidity.

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He a big loser and i would take him to court for support

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If your not with the other guy you was seeing and have his child then I would concentrate on your children and yourself. Sure I read that right that you have 2 children now

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I’m confused… you pregnant with someone else’s child, but you worried about your deadbeat ex???

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Sounds like you like to be treated bad. Or into toxic relationships. If he’s there fo his kid let him be there .I feel bad for your current partner he don’t deserve that.

Please move on. He didn’t provide for your child when you were together he’s definitely not going to do it now. He’s found someone else to put up with his lack of self motivation and who will take care of him. He took advantage of you long enough please see you’re worth more than that. I hope the new man is willing to provide for his child and at least acknowledge that you are that child’s mother. NEVER let a man make you feel like you need him to survive. You will be fine on your own and don’t be afraid to ask for help. It sounds to me like you have done a pretty good job raising your child without him. It’s a hard lesson to learn you don’t NEED a man you want a partner. I wish you the best of luck

I won’t use the word “stupid”, but I will say it appears you’ve made some very bad choices in your life.

Go back and read what you wrote. Write down all the positive you said and all the negative. That should give you a huge idea/solution.

Here are the pros that I took away from what you wrote:
Your child.

Here are the cons:
Spent his time playing PS4,
didn’t work,
didn’t provide for you, your son, or himself.
You cooked for him even though you were working and he wasn’t. You said he was lazy.
He couldn’t hold a job.
He would shut you down,
he laughed in your face,
he sent you a photo of another woman and posted it on social media,
he moved to Australia. I don’t know where you live, but how was he able to move to Australia?
He hasn’t paid child support.

I tried to find a few more pros, and you did write that he did stuff for you, but you didn’t go into detail. And then you said he’s not all bad. Maybe you need to take a look at what your definition of not all bad is.

Perhaps most people occasionally think about what could’ve happened if they would’ve stayed in a relationship, but I don’t think most of them are as obsessed as you are. The fact that you are with a new guy, you’re carrying his child, and you’re obsessing over an ex, is very disrespectful to your new guy.

You’ll need more than good luck, but I truly hope things work out for the children because they don’t have a say in the matter.

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If you can support yourself an your child then STAY SINGLE!!! Focus on your child/children and take him to court for child support…women lookin for a baby daddy for there kids …Well we have all read those stories…STAY SINGLE!!!

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Wtf is wrong with you? I mean seriously.

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You have issues ! And clearly don’t know what the hell you want you are crying about an ex that clearly doesn’t care about you or your son treated you like crap you’re pregnant with someone else’s baby humiliates you to your face moves to another country doesn’t support his child and you’re still crying over this loser ? Girl you are not a victim but a willing participant . Grow up move on take care of your kids and learn to love yourself and stop chasing losers !

Some of these replies aren’t the nicest.
Chick your prob thinking about him because it’s the known. I’m sorry your hurting, but Everyone deserves better then a giant man baby without a future. Block him and focus on you and your
Children.

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Stay away from him. Do not act on your time thoughts. It’s all part of getting over him and moving on.

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You need closure. You were abused my dear. Mentally you were abd thats not ok. You deserve happiness and need to let it go. I suggest some counseling with a therapist. It will be very beneficial for you. I hope you have peace soon.

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Do you know what you want? Like sit down and be honest…what do you want for you and your children’s life. Focus on what really matters and let the past be the past. Seriously…there’s also alot of self love learning to do here cuz there’s a reason why they are exes​:point_left::woman_shrugging:t4:

Girl self esteem is damaged get some therapy

Ummmm. Maybe you should have not cheated on him and got pregnant… your own fault dummy

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Are you serious. You want him back??:flushed:

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Just remember you left him for a reason you moved on let your ex move on he is a x for a reason good or bad you left let it go stop wandering what was and constraint on what’s right in front of you now

Childish … what happen new boy ? Weirdo worry about your kids …

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What you want to financially support him some more while he sits around playing video games all day waiting for you to cook for him? Is that what you miss? Stop making a fool of yourself trying to go back to him.

He broke up with you and then wanted to treat you like a wife. That’s not “a nice guy”. Just because he didnt hit you doesnt make him a nice guy. A nice guy helps you cook. A nice guy helps you out because he likes you, without asking for anything in return. This dude was a leech, and you need to take a step back and raise your standards.

File child support on his ass. And get a therapist

If you are thinking about him think about why you left him and that will reinforce the reason you are not together. Think about how you don’t have to take care of him and how he was mean to you. If you found someone else then make sure he has no bad qualities of your ex. Move on and take care of you and your children. If you aren’t with the new baby daddy file children support on him. The other baby daddy is in another country so it’s harder to get money from him but try. But move in and maybe seek therapy for yourself.

You need some professional counseling