I can't stop thinking about my ex

I broke up with my partner of 10 years. We have a child together he’s 8 . We wasnt together for a couple of months but we stayed in the same house. He spent most of his time on the ps4 , I would be working providing for him and our son , paying for his car and anything else that needed paying for, food every thing you name it, if I didn’t cook he would get angry , if I cooked for myself he would get angry again , He got lazy and always made excuses about going back to work , he got let go 3 times and was given multiple chances too. Like he’s nice , he’s done stuff for me too, he’s not all bad but in that situation we was struggling so bad trying to make ends meet. Anyways : I met someone amazing , we was talking for a couple of months before we met up , I got pregnant by that other guy real fast .
But sometimes I find myself thinking of my exs , like I even have moments where iv asked for him back , cried , sent him long messages , crying my heart out but he pretty much gave me the seen, shut me down , laughed in my face and talked high about them other girls he’s talking too , he even sent me a picture of someone he really liked , posted stuff about them but when we was together he never once posted me ANYWHERE …
Ohhh and he moved to Australia.
He hasn’t given me any suppose with our son but when I go ask for money he says : he doesn’t have any But he has money for his game.


Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. I can't stop thinking about my ex

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You are showing your child how a women should be treated by a man you need to stop being a child and grow up


Y omg time to grow up . U like being treated like a door mat and let ur kid watch that . Ur poor babies.


Why would you be longing for him? He sounds like another kid to raise. Concentrate on yourself and your children for awhile


He flat out is telling you he doesn’t want to be with you. What more do you want? He was t a good provider so why do you want him back? I understand you live him but it’s time you move on with your life.


You can’t be in a relationship until you learn to take care of yourself and your children.


I heard before that it’s not the person you miss but the habits


If he were to come back to you what would you expect fr om him.More of the same treatment.He’s become a bad habit.think of it this way , if a friend or relative of yours was going through this , what advice would you give them.The guy is a bad adiction.he is doing nothing for you that you can’t do for yourself. And your child would grow up thinking that this is normal behaviour.Mom works and dad sits at home playing games and treating her like a door mat.You are more than that , better than that and you deserve more than that.You are better off without him.stop under valuing yourself.Look in the mirror and see the beautifull woman that God created.Perhaps you might benifit from some counselling.
Youve been under this guys thumb for so long that youve forgotten the queen that you are.You have strength in you and the possibilities are endless.Between you and your babies you can have a wonderfull life without the burden that is your ex.God bless you may you find peace and joy with your children and allow yourself to heal before getting into another reashionship.


what do you want to go back for, more bad treatment? Time to go to counseling and put your children first. Just because your life is messed up don’t ruin theirs. You can worry about your relationships after you get help and your kids are grown.
Go to Family Services and file a complaint against him. You may never get any support but he may come back someday and they will take the support from his Social Security payment. Best wishes


I hate to tell you this but it’s all about priority. If you or your child were not a reason to get off the couch and help you, then he really wasn’t that vested in your relationship. If you’re with a person that loves, respects and honors you the rest is just icing on the cake. Please don’t keep opening the back door to your heart. Move forward and you will find happiness

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Concentrate on you and your babies. God gave them to you and you have to do the best you possibly can for them. If their dads are deadbeats, then you don’t need them. Kids need stability in their lives and so do adults. We are in constant chaos if we don’t have it. Get closer to God during this time, He is everything a husband is and more. Know who you are in Him and take value in that. I had alot of people trying to pull me out of my situation because I didn’t value myself enough to do it myself. I’m gonna pray that God surrounds you with an amazing support system and bring peace into you situation. For the folks that are just plain being rude I hope you guys never get into a situation like this one and if you do I hope someone is there to help you instead of being so critical. :blush:


When we miss someone, it’s something that we miss involving them. You spoke about all the bad things about him but those aren’t the things you miss. There’s something good that you miss. And whatever it is you’re missing, is evident that you’re not finding it in the new guy. The answer to this is to WEIGH the issue. Find out what out weighs the other. If many good things about the new guy outweighs the bad things about the other guy, then be CONTENT. A new house looks better with new furniture.


I’m reckoning you think you don’t deserve to be happy…but you do, we all do, apply through the courts for child support and take care of you and your little one, you both deserve happiness.:heart:


Take it from someone who remarried their high school sweetheart twice. DON’T DO IT!!!
Yes we have 2 beautiful children/adults now. Just stay strong and don’t go backwards. It just hurts three times worse :sob:. Good luck. Be smart and stay away for everyone’s benefit. It sounds like you’d be doing it all by yourself again anyway.


Anyone who plays video games to the detriment of his wife and child has no business having either

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I might be the odd one out but I understand some what, you see him posting this other female and putting her on a pedestal and I’m sure you fought for him to be like that with you. Nobody gets the same version of a person tho. You need to find someone who makes you the best you that you can be. Not sure if your still with the father of baby 2 ? But I’d try to just move on and focus on the babies and becoming a better you.


The man won’t work or support his kid and you want him back? Then meet another guy and get pregnant? No birth control? Now you are a single mom with 2 baby daddies! Girl get some counseling and some birth control. And file for child support!


Both immature…I feel bad for both kids.


Seriously? What is the question?


Grow up and stop acting like a teenager. Now you have 2 children. Your ex clearly left state for a reason he doesn’t want you. Why do you keep chasing him? Get some serious help and please dont keep getting in relationships you dont need that


Stop bringing children into the world into broken homes and relationships. They deserve better and so do you.


Go back to school and get your life straightened out so you can be good independent Mom. Work on your self esteem. Happiness will find you when you’re ready. Go back to school.


Lady wake the he’ll up. U didn’t lose anything except a frigging looser. R u serious??? He’s not worth it for heaven sake. He was lazy n didn’t give a flying shit that u were busting ur ass to support him n ur son n still was struggling. Please get ur head out of ur ass n move on bc he’s not giving u a thought. Do not lower urself to this low life especially when he’s laughing in ur face. Where’s ur pride???

Oh sweetie, someone’s needs to slap you so you wake up from this nightmare!!! He’s in Australia, he is Australia’s problem now, not your problem any longer!! Hang it up, don’t waste your time, money or heart
on him!! Stop having children by different men, you have two children and you are depending on support from their fathers (which you may never get) stop having children unless you can support them on your own!!


It’s time to value and respect yourself but most of all, focus on your child.


I feel for you. You are like me you need a crisis to feel comfortable. You are with someone now who is awesome and you don’t believe you deserve it.


Get a court order and have the court make him pay child support, you need to speak to a therapist and get counseling, there is also a type of syndrome that you can be dealing with. No man is worth what your going through but unless you receive help to see it, then no matter what we say you will still keep doing what your doing, and despite how he treats you, you start thinking and all the sudden think you need him back and beg him again. Your children should be your top priority not some waste of a sperm donor who wont even support his kids.


Are you for real ? …you need to learn how to take care of a gamer partner …we gamers spend hrs on end playing and we expect dinner and house cleaned and money for our games …some respect please …no wonder he won’t take you back . Sheeeesh

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He moved himself to the curb, change is hard to get used to but it’s in your best interest to let him go. I wouldn’t ask for support, you know he doesn’t have it :woman_shrugging:t4: the less communication with him the better

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Hard Look…instead of working on y’alls problems, you turned to another man. No matter how badly he behaved at times he was loyal to you and you threw that in his face. You want him back because you know you did him wrong and want a chance to make things right. He is not gonna forgive you any time soon and that makes you want him more. He’s obviously gonna be an asshole about everything and make sure you get nothing from him but crapp it’s an all too common thing these days, caused by two people who focus more on themselves individually than as a couple. Somehow, you’ve got to get away from him completely. Otherwise you will never be able to forgive yourself and move on. We all make mistakes, some more life changing than others, but you can’t continue letting the past dictate your present or future. Personally, I don’t think you’re a bad person. God certainly doesn’t see you as a bad person. So say your apologies, ask for forgiveness and move on to a life you’re happy with. You don’t deserve to suffer thru this forever!

It’s called self respect and that’s where you should start from. If you don’t do that many people get the wrong message meaning they can walk all over you.

Move on. It will be the best thing you did for yourself. Don’t look in the past. He isnt

You and your kids can survive in your own. You can make it… walk away with the kid/s. Focus on them than making a life suffocating.

Please concentrate on your new man he sounds lovely,you are so used to a deadbeat and deabeat father that you are not used to being treated well.Forget the loser he does not want you and will bring you a life of misery.You must think of your kids first as they will grow thinking this behaviour is normal.


You need to learn that your ex doesn’t want you the same way you want him. He treated you like crap, you need to move on. You meet someone who you really liked and treated you like you were a person and not as if you were gum on the bottom of his shoes like your ex did.

You’re part of the problem, move on and grow up.

You have no choice but to file for child support. I dont get why more women don’t.

Why would you even want him back, he clearly was using you. Move on and don’t Look back!

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He was abusing you financially (at least). You are trauma-bonded. You just have to keep reminding yourself that you are better than him and he doesn’t deserve you.

What are you talking about you were providing for two children not your man you now have two children what is your problem

Do you love torturing yourself? Be glad he is gone! Forget him and move on!

Time to focus on your child who did not ask to come into this world.
If women quit putting out before marriage this unhappiness would stop


You already have your answer - Just look in the mirror and confirm it.

If you like suffering and struggling to pay for everything then go to Australia and be with him.

If you paid for everything when you all were “together” why on earth do you think that he would give you money now​:thinking::thinking::thinking:

Apparently, he had some money :moneybag: if he’s in Australia now.

Count your Blessings- You dodged a bullet by not being married to him.

Move on - He has🤷‍♀️

This too shall pass…think of what u want in ur life…think so hard that it manifests…whatever it may be…

Poor children. Not a single neuron in sight.

Just pretend he’s dead. He might as well be, and he wasn’t any good when you did have him.

Please get some therapy to figure out why you prefer a man who treats you like trash.

So you miss being treated like crap?

For not having any money or drive to work that’s an expensive af move. Cost of living in Australia is high!

Simple a person can hold a grudge… they may never get over it… ans will make you jump through hurdles. Just making you the fool.

And you want him back why?

Why are you doing this to yourself?:thinking:

Why do you want him back?

Really? Gotta be made up!

Give it up be with someone who cares and you can file for support no matter where he is get counseling


Never look back, only forward! He sounds like bad news, consider yourself lucky.

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I don’t think you need advice, you know the right answers so just do it!

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He is gone but should give child support

Sounds like Ari and her ex on 90 Day Fiance. She still loves him

Self esteem issue… and you laying all yer life on Facebook… grow up… suck it up…for your kids sake

It’s called codependency, get some counseling for yourself and your son.

Get your life in order, woman! Let go of lazy mwn. All they know how to do is make babies and heartache!!

Have respect for u don’t chase him let him chase u

I won’t read it all, you know what to do…kick him to the curb … your better than that

You need a Brain Surgeon

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You need help big time. Get some counseling to see why you are so selfdestructive.

Think about your kids, n go sat down.

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So both of yall need to do some growing up. Hes gone. Lets him stay gone. Right now hes a using loser.

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Family court. Stop messing with your life. Kids come first. Ughhh

Please grow up! You have two children!

Soul ties cleanse yourself fast/prayer you will get him out your system.! Look up Tamarrah Tarver on FB she will explain!!!

Let him go and concentrate on the new baby. If he comes back to states go after child support!

If hes not contributing to the household kick him out

Sounds like a fake story. If its true you need counseling

Dead beat dad. Move on. You can do better without him. And your son too.

He never grew up- a boy man!

Lord have mercy :pleading_face: this isn’t a man, that was a immature child that needs a mummy.
You need to cut cut cut cut and focus on yourself and your son.
If you were married youare lucky he didn’t keep your son and make you paychild support and alimony. Get yourself a good lawyer and go after him for child support …
Keep every possible receipt clothes school supplies day care and also make sure you file taxes first he us likely to claim your kids every year it’s a battle of who files first.
Take a huge sigh of relief and move on.

Girl, you need professional help.

You need counseling. Why would you want a loser like that? You were not happy with him. He lives in another part of the world. He does not want you. Stop picking losers. You are having to support your babies. Ever heard of contraceptions. Look out for yourself. No one else has looked out for you


You must be stupid to have anything to do with him.cut him loose and enjoy the rest of your life .

He, the ex, is a LOSER. Don’t go back 10 steps, move forward

stop being a doormat

Omg. They walk among us.

You didn t loose anything, you gained everything

Why oh why did you get pregnant with another man? You clearly need to grow-up.

Give him the flick once and for all

You seriously need to seek some professional help.


My I.Q fell reading this

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Girl, therapy. Run. Don’t wait.

Re-read your post as if you were the best friend giving advice

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Why in the world do you want that looser back

Get him out of the house and teach him how to support him self and have a court order child support for him to pay…It looks like he is a bummer and just useless.

You’re trauma bonded not in love, get a therapist

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He is a loser! Sometimes you have to let your head rule your heart! I think this is one of those times! You know he isnt good for you or your child. Move along and make your life better!

Loser! Why are you carrying this dead weight? Get over your “I gotta have a man” Syndrome!

He’s one of those what you call a deadbeat no offense. I think the only time you’re going to have any chance of getting over him would you really should do for yourself cuz you do deserve to move on and find someone better, is to actually separate and not live together.

Girl… stop being dumb . Let him go. He’s not worth it. Put him on child support. At one point it will catch up to him.

Girl how can you be so dumb in wanting this dude back in your life. It sounds like you are working and able to support yourself. You did say where you live but that he moved of to Australia, so makes you think he will come back to you. It may be hard for you to work and support you family and find someone that will treat you right and has a job , but you would be so much better off forgetting this loser. Good luck in the future.

Grow up and start taking care of yourself and your kid and quit trying to find a guy. You don’t need a guy. You just want a guy. If it’s meant to be it will happen.