I’m right there with you only I’ve been married 44 years and I can count on 1 hand how many times he bought something for me
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Don’t blame you for feeling sad and hurt. The boys seem like they’ve never been shown how to appreciate you and this is very sad for them and their future relationships.
Do you have a male friend or brother who could show your husband where he is going wrong without it coming from you?
Sorry but i’d be on strike … thats very selfish of your husband and kids.
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I completely know what you mean. Appreciation and the little things, mean a lot!!
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You are NOT overreacting. He has children to teach how to be men, which means he needs them to learn how to treat their Mom. You have every right to feel sad and upset. Might I suggest a talk over the dinner table about taking people for granted and how to show appreciation? 
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Say something to your family…
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My grown children didnt even acknowledge mothers day so I decided I wont acknowledge their birthdays 
Last year thats what happened here so I didn’t buy him nothing for fathers day and when he said something I said what did I get
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Sorry to say you didn’t teach your children anything so the are looking at your Husbands behavior and again he is a Moron a good talk is needed here don’t take that anymore be a strong woman like you are taking care of the House.
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I was married to a man for 41 years and I never received one gift from him. I know where you are coming from. It hurts that they don’t appreciate you enough to even get you a card.
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stop getting him gifts see what happend then
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Know exactly how you feel. Only 2 out of my 4 kids made an effort. And their young adults. I felt absolutely unloved and unappreciated for everything we do. We organise months in advance , not last minute gifts and put effort into everything we do. Sending hugs and it truly does become an issue when we aren’t acknowledged at least a few times.
A card with a beautiful verse would be most appreciated I imagine. You are not over reacting, you truly deserve to feel special 
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That is wrong,I’d be hurt too!!Talk to your hubby about how this makes you feel
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He needs to teach his boys how to treat a girlfriend, wife, and mother. That is his respobsubility.
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Don’t buy the kids anything for Christmas and birthday including husband and don’t always cook and clean go
Out
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I thought I was the only one. This post made me feel better in that at least I’m not alone.
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Forget that, give them a taste of they’re own.
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What is wrong with these men that can produce babies but not teach them the morals and values and how to treat their mother on Mother’s Day??? My son in law didn’t say a word to her for Mother’s Day they have 2 small children and one who is due today… no consideration and he claims to be such a Christian man. My ass your a pos for making my daughter feel no appreciation… like what’s so hard about making someone you say you love feel special???
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I find these situations very sad. Speak up for yourself.
As MeDear ‘Ole Gramps used to say,
“You teach others how to treat you!”
My late husband wasn’t a big fan of shopping, however, he never missed a chance to help the kids make me smthg special. It could be cooking a meal, planting flowers, making cards or ornaments, building smthg. The list goes on and on…
My kids are now grown and these keepsakes are like gold to me.
Now, my kids and my current husband always come up with little special to spoil me.
Just leave his broke ass. U don’t need a loser like that. Take ur kids and file for alimony & child support
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You have let it be that way if you want change take his phone and set up reminders sorry that you feel this way but help him help you feel better
You are a good mama you are but boys see things differently not all boys I mind you but a lot do
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Own your feelings and taketh high road.
Jeezuz, wake that man and your boys up!! Try not doing anything for a day or a week then tell them why… If they don’t learn, we’ll, I’d walk out
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I completely understand. I didn’t get anything as well not even a hmd by mouth by my husband who doesn’t work right now I do on 3rd shift with a health condition. I feel on you on doing everything around the house. Happy mother’s day to all moms who are going through this.
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You have to have a family meeting and communicate to these people your hurt and ungratefulness you are getting from them. You must communicate that this is important to you. They’ll either get it or they won’t. Either way, do you. Take care of yourself FIRST. Because if your cup isn’t full then there is nothing else to give to others. “My cup overfloweth…”
What’s in my cup is mine but what over flows is for everybody else, that’s why self care is so important.
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I’m really sorry you weren’t acknowledged this Mothers Day. Presents are important. It’s a way of expressing our love and gratitude. I’d be very upset. You deserve better. If it were me, is be having a family meeting. Express how the neglect makes you feel. luv
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I understand completely.
Feeling unappreciated is a hurtful emotion. And after awhile it wears on the soul.
The example you are setting for your boys tho, is amazing. Teach them how women need to be treated 
You have every right to be treated the same, I never forget doing things for my wife on special occasions.
Stop purchasing gifts for him it is that simple. I don’t care how hard he work he needs to show appreciation. The work you do all days .
If it is possible you need to look for a job no matter how small .
That hard working excuse does not cut it. Speak to him not only when they are occasions. Speak on your feelings .No ,stop being the door mat.This is also silently telling your children daddy only matters gift wise.Remember they will be the husbands of tomorrow. Train them well
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You deserve so much more and better!!
I’m so sorry. We are the ones who hold the family together. They lose something we find it. Hurt we make it better. Questions we answer them. Hungry we feed them. Heart broken we make it better… but we get over looked. My son didn’t even acknowledge me on Mother’s Day. I always done something for my mom & dad on their special days.
This is so me , I have just accepted by that my hubby is mostly not a gift giver , I just buy what I want.
I think my s/o is related to ur husband smfh The only one of my kids that got me anything was my daughter and her s/o She’s the only girl. I think it’s important that dad’s teach their kids to recognize us Moms on special days like this. I got a “Happy Mother’s Day” from all but one (I’m a step to 3 and have two biological) I understand where you are coming from. You feel like you’re taken for granted and you have every right to feel let down and disappointed. Like you, I make sure their dad is remembered on special days Same thing usually happens on Valentines and my bday. If I have to remind them I think it defeats the purpose so I usually don’t. I just keep hoping every year that maybe they will surprise me…Until that happens I just reward myself and do something or buy something (sometimes both) for myself! Sometimes you have to be your own happiness and not rely on others to make you happy. For obvious reasons, if you don’t then no one will. Be selfish on those days and think of no one but yourself. Go away for the weekend…and let them fend for themselves. Let Dad get a reality check and see for himself just how much you really do. Get urself a mani/pedi, have a night with the girls etc. Don’t wait for anyone to make you happy. Happiness starts and ends with you! Best wishes and Happy Mother’s Day 
well I must be the worlds worst mom cause not one of my 4 daughters gave me a shout out for moms day. Hurt yes but number 3 daughter uses my truck to go to work every day lol. Yup I am such a bad mom lol as I got up ay 4.30 in the morning to take daughter to swim classes every day for 2 yrs to the city but hey I am dirt. Went with 1 to asia so she could model but not worth being wished happy mos day. What ever I will trugh on with out them. Oh num 4 just had a baby but did not tell me. go figure.
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My husband works 80 hours a week sometimes i have to put that poor man bavk to bed when he tries to go to work. Your husband like mine just may need a gentle reminder that said holiday is coming up. Give him the benefit of the doubt he is probably just over worked and tired.
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Yes no presents for your husband or kids
I feel this in my soul
Take a vacation with a girlfriend or your sister … WITHOUT him or kids for a week or two… Make sure you leave them laundry and dishes etc for them to do … !! They have become accustomed to YOU doing everything for them. Being gone for a week or two will bring the realization of your worth to the forefront of their thinking real quick. Do NOT leave phone numbers or anyway to reach you. It will shake them awake. Try it you’ll have fun feel refreshed …and they will have a good awakening …
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Stop doing for all of them your being taken for granted…stop cooking and cleaning and doing the laundry focus on you for once…take yourself out to eat…go see a movie…buy yourself an outfit…get a main pedi… pamper yourself you are the only deserving one in that family instead of the selfish husband and sons you have…its a shame the dont appreciate you enough is enough your the only one who can put a stop to this…dont let them put you in the grave
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I’m sorry,it’s never a good feeling to feel unappreciated 🥲 If my husband ever pulled that mess my petty azz would treat myself to something nice ,hand him the receipt and thank him for the lovely Mothers Day gift.
Seriously tho I would call him out on that & tell him that you don’t appreciate being treated that way. You gave him 4 beautiful children so he can acknowledge that fact one day out of the year.
All I asked of my two sons was to clean the house and I ended having to do the most of it, I didn’t receive any gifts, my son made me Asian food out of a box, and got me ice cream from the store. I didn’t get to spend anytime w my daughter that day. But I was still thankful for what I did get
Do NOT get him anything for Father’s Day! Don’t cook. Don’t clean. Leave his ass with the kids and take a day off! NOBODY can stand up for you but YOU! There’s absolutely no excuse for a man to fail to invest in a relationship when his wife is working her ass off for the family! I mean it! You keep lowering your standards and those boys are learning that it’s OK to treat a woman like shit! Stop it! Their future wives will thank you!
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I went and bought myself a mustang GT convertible. I got the cards and flowers but for some reason just didn’t cut it this year.
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you need to communicate this to your husband he is modeling behavior to your sons to be the exact way. he has to know the impact and importance of this on any woman
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No advice just know your not alone!
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I’d be very upset too. But unfortunately you mentioned he doesn’t buy you any gifts on any occasions. So you know how he is unfortunately. But I’d express your feelings to him and see if things change. Everyone deserves to be acknowledged, even if it’s just a card. (Hugs) You deserve to be shown love from your husband and your kids.
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Even a homemade card would have been better, but it is not going to happen.
So with no apologies, go buy something just for you! It is not the same but I did this for years with no quilt attached.
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So give him the same respect he gives you and stop giving gifts. And take that money and go out and buy yourself something nice instead 
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I don’t have any biological children but I have fostered 4 children, 3 of whom I still keep in touch with and am always here for if they need me for anything. I also have 2 step children. These children are all now adults. I got a message from the oldest of the foster children on mothers day and a belated message from another one the day after. Mothers day is always hard for me as my own mother is no longer with us so I miss her terribly. The fact that I could never have children of my own also makes mothers day a hard day for me. I have put my heart and soul into these other children and tried my best and do feel very underappreciated and unloved. 
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Nothing changes if nothing changes. If you hold all this in and never say anything about how hurt you are, it will just continue next year. He and your boys need to be asked why you were forgotten. Ask them. See what they say. Put them on the spot. Even if it’s a handmade card it would be something. Ask them how they’d feel to be forgotten.
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You have a right to be hurt. You also are not responsible for doing things to make days special for your husband. Stop doing those things.
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Make mother’s day for yourself. You do what you want with your children and have fun doin it. Its not material stuff it’s about the time spent with the ones you love.
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I’ve learned you need to tell your bits your feelings. One day they’ll be husbands, fathers etc
They need to learn to be thoughtful!
What if you didn’t cook? Or remember they’re birthdays, Christmas?
I always gave my sons excuses! No excuses! I’m worth more then any gift! Now. Whether it’s flowers. A card, etc or taking you to dinner? Your worth it! Stand up for yourself! Your worth it!!! No excuses anymore! If they don’t, take your husbands, partner etc credit card and go treat yourself!
The part I’m cuing in on is you said if you mention holidays or occasions to him then he will acknowledge and celebrate or buy something for you. As a person who is related to and a mother of Autistic individuals this is one of their traits. I’m not saying that’s what is going on, just trying to give a different perspective. It might be that you just need to have a long talk with him and put the events into his calendar on his phone. I know with my people when an important event is overlooked they feel really bad so I’ve learned to be proactive and remind them beforehand.
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Please have an honest, up front conversation with your husband. If he doesn’t make an effort then show him how it feels.
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Instead of addressing it with hurt, tell them all what it really means to you to be remembered and that just like you remember them, it is appreciated if they did the same. Don’t guilt them. Guide them. It works much better.
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Was he always like that if so then that’s on the other if he just lost his self then you need to have a conversation. You should get those things if you celebrate it because some people don’t celebrate birthdays and stuff. Tell your kids how you feel as well.
God rest my mother’s soul… she raised 7 of us. She always said, they won’t miss YOU… but they’ll miss what you DO for them.” There’s no truer statement. I would have a serious sit down with at least your husband. He’s teaching these boys to treat their wives the same as he is treating you. Everyone needs to feel appreciated. If your boys are old enough, I’d talk to them, too. They need to learn now. Even if they don’t go out with dad to buy you something… they can make you a card, make you breakfast, vacuum the house, clean up the kitchen… etc. No excuses for them, either. Teach them to appreciate what others do for them. This way, one day they will do the same for their wife… I’m sorry they didn’t make your day special. Maybe with your guidance, next year will be different. They can always make up for this one… every day is Mother’s Day.
Stop buying him shit. Further your education. Find a job. Divorce him. You’re clearly not getting what you need out of that relationship and never will.
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Where are you located? Would you like to have a girl’s day, on me? One momma to another?
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I promise you you are not the only one that this has happened to.As far as your kids when they get older and can then they will acknowledge what you have done.Your ungrateful husband, well just STOP buying him gifts and stop acknowledging him on holidays and birthdays just like he does you.Mine told me our anniversary was just another day one time, hurt me to the bone, well now, guess what? it’s just another day.So your kids are not old enough yet to realize what it means but they will resent him for treating you that way eventually. Hang in there mom.LOL The heck of it is my husband still wonders why the kids don’t buy him what he asks for on holidays
My mother’s been married for 30 something years and her husband just doesn’t figure it out either. I take offense to it I’m her daughter but it is what it is he’ll never change. He did buy her blueberry plants this year cuz I made her ask for something lol
If he has never been the gift giving type, you can’t expect it out of the blue. However he should think of you on special occasions, or do something to show you some appreciation.
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No. You aren’t over reacting. You should book a mani pedi and after that just go shopping. Do you. Pamper yourself. Then when they see you all shiny and beaming… they will ask why. . You tell them that since no one acknowledged mothers day, you pampered yourself. Then, every holiday, stop reminding him. If a Christmas tree or decorations doest wake him up then he’s beyond repair. If he shows remorse and says he’s just not good at remembering holidays, take his phone set all holidays in then set reminders. That way his phone does the work.
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Do something for yourself! That’s bullshit. You need to tell him how you feel. And hope it sinks in!
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I’ve never gotten anything from my husband ( I did before but not since we got married) nor my older kids. I guess I’m just numb to not receiving anything. I still get everyone (including husband) things for them because it’s who I am. I’m a giver and I accept the fact that they are not.
Well, next year for Mother’s Day make it known that you’ll be gone all day. Do what you want (manicure, pedicure, whatever YOU like) maybe Saturday with your girlfriends. Leave your kids with paper and card ideas. Stay gone all day.
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What ages are your boys? Are they old enough to go shopping or remind their dad to take them to the store?
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STOP doing for them on holidays and birthdays.
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You teach people how to treat you. Tell them you feel underappreciated and it hurts.
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I am in the same exact boat
Very sad. Get sitter for kids, book a weekend get away with your hubby and tell him how you feel. If he doesn’t get it, wait a few months book another get away and take a girlfriend. You deserve it.
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You have the right. Make Mother’s Day about you. I’d tell him a week in advance I’ve booked a 2 hour massage and I’m doing dinner and a movie night out with girlfriends. Figure out the kids because I’m worth more than this.
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Maybe he buying gifts for his side chick
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That’s sad, I’m hurt for you. It’s not just the gifts, the boys could of made a card or washed dishes or vacuumed…etc, said “hey thanks for everything you do”… my heart hurts for you.
Lol… maybe the “other” woman got something nice 
… you should ask her or him…sounds to me like you don’t matter… anymore 
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My ex husband was very similar to yours. His reasoning was if I needed something I would always get it for myself so I obviously didn’t need anything. Also “stingy” on his verbal compliments towards me, saying everyone else tells you you look good, so why should I. Yet, he would compliment others at church or wherever we were at. We had three kids that are 100% appreciative and different from him so that is a blessing! I would always remember birthdays, anniversaries, special days, etc. He never did. Needless to say, I divorced my husband after a 25 year marriage. I just could not see how he could “take care” of me in my retirement years if he didn’t even appreciate me in my younger, healthier years. I might add that I have worked nonstop since the age of 17 and just retired at the age of 62. I was a schoolteacher for 29 years and then returned to school and became a registered nurse after I retired from teaching. So I carried my weight of the financial responsibility in our family as well. … He passed away three months ago which still made me sad. I just will never understand why he stopped appreciating me and I guess loving me. As far as I know, there was never any cheating while we were married and he never remarried. I guess some things we just aren’t meant to understand. … Sorry that my post was too long. Just wanted you to know that others are going through or have gone through the same as you.
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I’m sorry but if you can’t even get a thank you on Mother’s Day then you don’t need to buy anyone anything in that family. If holidays or special dates mean nothing to him then you need to show him the same courtesy and get him nothing because no one will appreciate you until you stop doing things for them. Your being undervalued and under appreciated and if you do so much and can’t even be thanked for a day then they need a wake up call. Have a spa day and leave the kids with the hubby and tell him you are giving yourself a pamper day for Mothers day cause YOU DESERVE IT
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Even a token of appreciation goes a long way, I feel you. Time for a family meeting and a vacay for you…let them fend for themselves for a bit!!!
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Family meeting in order. Your sons are learning from your husband and they will treat their future partners the same. This will not reflect well with their partners family Tobe sure. Your husband needs to set an example and get their buttons in gear as you do for him.
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They take you for granted. You are so giving that they don’t think to give anything in return. You have a right to be hurt. I didn’t receive gifts but all four of my kids wished me a happy Mother’s Day and said they appreciate me
After years of being forgotten on my birthday and Mother’s Day, I “forgot” everyone’s birthday last year. This year, I WAS REMEMBERED!
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This is me to a tee. In the same boat.
Get him the same things he gets you for birthdays, Christmas, Father’s day etc.
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The other day we went to our son and daughter in law’s to celebrate their 5th anniversary (who does that?) and had a card for them. When I handed it to him he said, “Oh, what did you get us?.” I said, “Same thing you always get us.” Which was nothing. He was momentarily confused but got the point.
Take the love languages test with him. Likely he isn’t seeing your love language as that isn’t how he thinks. And it’s okay to ask to have your needs met and to know you are valued.
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I’m so sorry that your children didn’t make you a card or do chores around the house in appreciation of their mom. My hubby always said you are not my mother so he did not get me anything but either had the children make or he took them out and purchased gifts. He also cooked for me on Mother’s Day. I hope you can get past this day and vocalize the things you would like. God bless
I have three boys and I didn’t do them any favors by letting them grow up thinking this was okay. I don’t have the answers of how to change it, I wish I did. The only thing I can change is my feelings.
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No you are not overreacting! Emotions are always justify. I think you should should sit them down and talk to them. Maybe receiving gifts is your love language! Everyone has their own love language. Look into the book 
5 Love Languages. I hope it works out 
you just want to feel appreciated.
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it’s all about boundaries. People treat us the way we let them.
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You have every right to feel the way your feeling! Dad and boys should have done something for you!
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Well maybe stop buying gifts for them and pamper urself🤷♀️
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Pick something up for yourself with his money and tell him thank you
Not everyone has the same love language. Maybe you could have a conversation with him about what makes you feel loved versus how he feels he’s showing you love. It sounds like you’re definitely not speaking the same love language. It’s worth a shot.
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Sometimes they forget. He loves you I’m sure.
Forget their birthdays and tell them you didn’t think they believed in gifts when you never seen anything of appreciation on Mother’s Day, and add but I do know how you feel. Same as you did
Buy yourself To Me From Me gifts!!
But if no gifts on Mother’s Day is getting you this upset, I think there is more to it. Sounds like there is an ongoing issue. That’s what I would be more upset about - not some overly commercial holiday. The ongoing issue.
Then stop doing things for him. He doesn’t appreciate you or what you do, I’m not saying be mean about it, but after 14 years I wouldn’t go out of my way for someone that ignored my feelings. Even a homemade card would show that he thought about you. And phones calenders these days have the holidays on them. He could set a reminder.
At the very least he could have helped or encouraged the kids to make homemade cards. My kids do every year and they are my favorite gift every year.