I don't like what my step-mom's mom makes my son call her: Advice?

How do you address people talking your child to call something you do not approve of? Long story short, my stepmoms, mother, is making my son call her LaLa. She is not a nice woman and does not like my husband or my self. I don’t like that my son is forced to call her something. But I don’t know how to put it nicely

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What do you want your son to call her ?

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What do you want him to call her? She’s not forcing him to call her mom-mom/grandma/nana/GiGi

It’s a good alternative

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What’s wrong with how you just said it? 🤷 tell step-gma just like that. What would you prefer he call her?

If she doesn’t like you or your husband why is your kid even around her?

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Don’t go around her then

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Lala isn’t really that bad, kids shouldn’t call adults by name until a certain age…if it is easier for your child to say Lala I would just let it be…its not a big deal.

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You’re reaching here for an issue. Let this go. Just bc you have an issue with a family member doesn’t mean you have to put it on your kid too.

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Does your son feel forced, or you being petty. Does she not like you for no reason, or is there a reason?

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Seriously…get over yourself and it.

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If it’s your stepmother’s mom aka great-grandmother… how often are you around her anyways? I, personally, feel like you should pick your battles and don’t understand what the big deal is. When raising kids, there are bigger things to worry about. :woman_shrugging:

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Think your being petty . She’s still his step grandma so really he could call her gma! My boys call both there step family gma and papa

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Is it really a fight to pick? Sometimes you have to choose your battles & this really sound like it’s worth fighting over to me

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Better than mom…my sons dad isn’t married and his gf tells my son she’s his mom

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Call her Tinky Winky instead then… or maybe Po.

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Wow…what’s the big deal, you have more important things in life to worry about.

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I would say he should call her whatever her grandkids call her. If they call her Lala, then that’s what he should call her. And if it’s really THAT bad, shame on you for letting your kid go around her. :woman_shrugging:t2:

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Oh my soul. Get over it no one said he should call her grandmother. Petty petty petty

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She gets to pick her name you don’t get to dictate that.

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What do you want him to call her?

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She is step grandma, doesnt want to take grandma away from real grandmother, lala is a nice alternative.

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First, why is your child around them if shes not a nice person?
2nd, what’s the big deal with Lala?! Hes not calling her nana or grandma or even great grandma.
You’re really over reacting here… unless theres more we dont know

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Tf you want the kid to call her? Bitch? Asshole? I know you’re not saying you want your child to call her by name because no matter how mean she is that is NEVER okay. Get over it.

Whats wrong with Lala? :roll_eyes:

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If you dont like it simply say it! Or address her as something else in front of her and tell her you’d prefer if he didnt call her ‘lala’ … This is HER child people. She doesnt need to chill out. If you dont approve of it make it known. If she isnt a nice woman dont worry about being nice when confronting the issue🤷

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Just don’t go around her? You can tell her straight up you don’t want your child to address her as anything in particular except her name if that’s how you feel. Idk how some people tiptoe around things you don’t like. Be straightforward.

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By marriage she would be his great grandmother so a grandma like name would be the norm.

I always thought grand parents got to pick what they wanted to be called . I feel like you are mad for a different reason.

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I’d say just teach your child to address her respectfully with whatever is comfortable for you.

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I think you mad cause you don’t like them.

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Does she do for your child? Does she treat him like her grandchild regardless if she likes you or not?

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Making him? Uhh NO
If he wants to…let him.
How often is he around said person? Would you really want him calling her Grandma or some other loved name? Like Leah Raimondo said…if she’s that bad he shouldn’t be around her at all.

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Teach your kid her name

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Your child, your rules. However this is a great teaching moment for you. You can be hateful and your son pick up on that, or take ole lady to the side (whether she likes you or not) and tell her what’s up! Your son, if YOU don’t want him to address someone that way… change it. Just don’t do it in front of your son. I mean they already don’t like you so if they bash you because you stand up for yourself, and your rules, that says more about them than you. Good luck momma :heart: don’t back down… do it with class and tact :star_struck::sunglasses:

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My moms stepmother said we could call her grandma I said nope. I didn’t either had a cousin who did and that was cause he sucked up to her to get money and stuff he wanted

My bonus grandbaby calls me Hun. Still a term of endearment while taking nothing away from paternal and maternal grandmas. It works for us.

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I’m not that nice of a person when it comes to people I don’t like. I always tell them my children will call them what they (my kids) want to and if they don’t like it they can just stay away from my kids. Like I said I’m not a nice person unless I like you. Just tell her she doesn’t get a say on what he calls her.

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My grandchildren have 4 grandma’s we really are all grandma. I it’s fine with me

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Sounds like there is more to this story than she is sharing.

I don’t want my son calling my dad Papa, it’s weird. so I feel this.

So let her ask to be called that but when you refer to her you can tell your son the name you want to call her. He can decide

Lala isn’t that bad

However you exposing your son to a women that doesn’t like him is the really problem.

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Omg why is this an issue? It’s a name and if you’re going to involve her in your child’s life I don’t see a problem with a name. My daughter has a GiGi, a MiMi, a Grampy, a grandma and a grandpa. Find something more important to worry about.

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I only follow this group to laugh at the stupid pettiness I see posted every day :joy::joy::joy:

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All they petty woman I dont like this I dont like that js grow up

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You’re grown . You are not obligated by any means any more to call her what society thinks is appropriate. They are YOUR feelings ! Address them as such.

La La…lol. Maybe your stepmother lives in La La Land…

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What do you want him to call her? Is that what all the other kids call her? I think the only issue here, is you are being petty.

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He should call her her name? Like that’s a normal thing. She doesn’t sound like she’s close with your child

Okay but if you’re going to be around her, he has to call her something ?

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I always let my kids call them what they want it’s all up to how my child feels

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Honesty would probably go better than trying to sugar coat it. I dont see the issue with “La La” except that tellitubbie thing :joy::joy::joy:

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What do you call her? If she’s gonna be around him at all, she kinda has to be called something. “She who shall not be named” just doesn’t work these days.

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Tell her she’s in La La land and she will be addressed by her name. Lol but if she’s nice to your son and treats him like a grandchild, I’d let it go honestly. But if she’s not, I’d say the above lolol

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It’s your child, you are not obligated to be nice. Tell your child to call her Mrs.?, and don’t be afraid to tell her why

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Being a that child that was forced to call a grandparent something and got in trouble when I didn’t… this is not ok. I’ve made it clear to all grandparents/great grandparents that we will call you what you’d like (nana vs grandma) but my child isn’t to be forced or get in trouble for calling them something else.

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REALLY? The pettiness we have seen come out in the last 3 years and before is just ridiculous. It isn’t the mom that should tell the gmas what the grands or greats should call them. Stop the pettiness… worry about real problematic issues… this is nothing.

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Seriously :roll_eyes:🤦 time to get over it

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Have him call her cray-cray…

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Did he chose to call you mom or did you choose it for him? What about his dad? Did you tell him to call your mom grandma??? Maybe someone she loves nicknamed her lala and she wants everyone to call her that?

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The kids will pick whatever they want to call whoever. My mom wanted to be called Nana, but my daughter calls her Nina instead🤷🏻‍♀️ she also calls her dads parents, 2 Mawmaw and 2 Pawpaw because she has 2 of them🤣

Honestly it’s not a big deal. It’s just a nickname, and if you all dont like each other your son probably won’t see her much anyway. There are worse things in the world than a name.

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If she doesn’t like you or your husband, there’s no real reason for your child to be around her. If he has to be, I’d tell him to call her by her name.

That’s kind of how it is with my mother’s mom. Everyone calls her mamaw or nana. I call her Wanda.

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If only this was my biggest worry in life

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Depending on how much the kid sees her you’ll know whether it will stick or not. If your kid is with you more, he’ll call her what you call her. If your son is around her and other kids who call her LaLa then he might call her that. But most of my nieces and nephews just call me by my name, not even Aunt, because even though their parent say that’s your Aunt Rachel, they know me as Rachel because that’s what everyone calls me. :woman_shrugging:t3: I have people tell me all the time they want my kids to call them XXX and since I don’t call them XXX my kids don’t either. I would say just let it ride, don’t focus on it, your kid will do as you say.

Seriously… the questions on here… you cant make this crap up… lol.

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it’s not your say what your child calls his step grandmother… regardless if you like her or not, you should be teaching your son to always treat her with respect and if she and him have come up with a pet name then butt out of it

Why does the name LaLa trouble you? Consider the reason why before making this an issue. I mean, from what you are saying you don’t get along and maybe that’s another irritation. I guess I’m suggesting pick a bigger battle to go to war.

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Teach your kid some respect if she was introduced to him as that …That is her name period …If you don’t like your teaches name you going to cry and whinge on here about that good Lord woman get a dam life

It’s your kid. And if you dont have a good relationship with them you have nothing to lose. So stand up and be bold, and say, he can call you ms. Whatever her last name is. And say i don’t him to call you nothing else he is uncomfortable calling you LaLa.
Sometimes you have to get ugly with people, if not they well walk all over you.

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:unamused::roll_eyes: it’s not like he’s calling her grandma

I’m Bopi for some unknown reason. Let it go, pick your battles girl and this shouldn’t be one of them

Being nice? Just tell your son to call her Ms.

Show your lo teletubbies and who Lala is …thrn have it playing and let her see lala she might change her mind :joy::joy:

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My mother’s sister has always been a thorn in my side. As long as my mom was alive I couldn’t get her out of our lives. I refered to her & called her Judy (instead of Aunt Judy). She was always mad & would correct me in front of my child. He called her Judy simply because that’s what he heard more. You’re mom call her by her name to your son. Don’t refer to as Lala. When she corrects you don’t get into it. Just continue what you were doing it change the subject. He will pick up on what you call her.

Let it be. It is not about you. It is between his dad, his dad’s wife, and her mother. Pick your battles.

Hahahah​:joy::joy::joy: PRIVLADGED people’s problem 101 :grin::grin::grin:

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it would be much worse if she was telling him to call her by the first name as if to be stating the fact they are not blood-related at the end of the day your son will pick what he is comfortable with dont sweat the small things in life look at it as at least she is including him in her life xx

My step mom passed away but was the only mom I ever had, even temporarily. I loved my kids calling her Mimi…I let them pick names

What’s wrong with Lala?

She sounds like your BEC. Lol. Does your son have an issue with Lala? If not, chill your milk makers.

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What do you prefer he calls her? How much time does he actually spend with her? If it’s just once in awhile let it go. Some things aren’t worth the fight

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Say he not calling you that. !!!

Their relationship has nothing to do with you.

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Your son your rules. If you dont approve say something.

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Is it because it’s your step moms mom? People expect step parents to accept and love but yet it’s the step parents whom aren’t accepted no matter how good they care. If your child looks to this woman as a grandma figure and she’s good to your child I’d leave it alone . Or kindly ask her to call her step grandma ? I don’t know.

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Its up to your son not you. No child has ever been harmed by having more people who love them in their lives.

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Say, oh no no no, I dont like that name. Let’s call her ______ ie,call her only by her name. Say this, after someone says, call her Lala, or your son is calling her Lala. Just remember, if you are bothered by something. Speak up right then and there. You are an Adult, and you are allowed to speak up. Obviously you wont have an attitude about it but if you dont like something, say it. It does not matter who it is, mom, dad, aunt, friend, coworker, neighbor, grandparents, etc

Christ how often do you see your stepmother’s mom? She doesn’t like you or your husband. Stay the hell away from her. If you have to see her have your son call her Miss (her first name). If it keeps your father from hearing his wife bitch about you then just have him call her LaLa.

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That’s not your business not happening in your household or on your time. If the child is safe that’s all that should matter to you… wow get over it your child might not even be in a relationship with those people by the time 18 comes around…

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You don’t have to put it nicely just bluntly. Man up and say he will not be calling you that. Your child your decision. If she is not nice to you or your husband not clear on why shes around your son. It is okay to cut toxic people out of your life but have you ever had a conversation about what the problem is?

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I mean idk what’s wrong with the name LaLa but if she doesnt like you or your hubby then why are you even around her? All she could possibly do is spit hate to your son. So my advice is dont call her anything or if you have to see her have your son call her Miss (whatever her 1st name is) out of respect.

Is your son uncomfortable? Cause YOU don’t matter in their home,just like SHE doesn’t matter in your home

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Wow, some rough comments. Look at why it bothers you.
Then decide if the fight is worth the energy.

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Your kid your rules. It would be nice to find an agreeable moniker but in the absence of that. It’s acceptable to explain your desire to raise a respectful child and part of showing respect to an elder is the use of an appropriate title.

I’m confused… what do you want her to be called then? You allow your son around her and to have a relationship with her, but don’t want her to have the name she wants to be called as a grandma? You guys should sit down and talk about your issues with each other.

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What would you want him to call her Lala is not any kind of offensive name I think you would prefer that he does not address her at all Selfie doesn’t have a name to call her he can’t ask her anything

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Then put as bluntly as u can

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Your child your rules do what u think is right for your son not to please anyone but your son

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What harm to you is being done? He has a special name for his nan. Is it because you don’t like her if so that shouldn’t effort the relationship between nan and grandson. My granddaughter calls my husband , her step grandad GaGa and he loves it because he has that special bond and I think that is why you don’t like it, she forming a bond with him. Seriously it’s not worth worrying yourself at the end of the day your son will form his own thoughts on his gran and let that be without your input. I don’t mean to sound harsh but blended families come with they own problem without adding to them.