Have 2 baby showers - one where she can decorate and the other one with your friends where you can decorate
If you think decorations at this baby shower is you biggest concern; hang on honey; you have a wake up call coming once baby arrives! Baby will teach you what things
really matter in life!
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Talk to her and let her know what your ideas are and then let her enjoy decorating. Some things are more important than having your decorations exactly the way you want them. In the end it’s the happy vibe that people will remember about the party
Honestly if she’s not close to her it’s for a reason why should she have to let her decorate her party. I wouldn’t want my mother in law doing it for me either. I would just say I’d rather be in charge of that because I have a certain idea in mind. And dedicate something else important for her to be in charge of. That way she doesn’t feel left out and can still be a part of her grandbabies shower.
Your boyfriend’s mother is trying to politely help you not be…a person who is throwing your own baby shower. Let her do that for you
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WOW!! How about if you’re that concerned over the issue. Then since it’s family and a new addition is arriving. I don’t know, how about an open line of communication. What’s the boyfriend stance ? Where’s his opinion on dealings with “Mom”. Usually happy occasion. That’s put on for the mother of the new born, Back in my day. I guess times have changed. Everything has to be micromanaged.
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A baby shower is usually an event organised by family abd friends for you. In the past it used to be a surprise. Why not let them do it and just go with the flow.
Let her know that is already being planned but let her help with invitations or come early and help decorate or last minute items!
Why are you or your boyfriends in charge of anything at the baby shower? I thought it should be hosted by friends or relatives.
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Let her decorate. She’s giving the shower for you. It’s not about your tastes. Sit back and relax and enjoy the party.
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Who is paying for the shower? If you are not then be great full for those that are, and love what ever they do!
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I would tell her that you already had decoration ideas and maybe she can come over and go over them with you and create a bond
So tell her it’s ok, but there are some things you don’t want and list them. Tell her how you imagined it and see if she is along the same line. You won’t know until you talk to her. Being as you guys aren’t really that close, this could help mend that space. This is her way of being supportive and allows you both to effectively communicate.
Life is to short. Let her throw you a shower. You could ask what her plans might be and tell her you really liked a certain theme
Who is throwing the baby shower. I agree with most. She wants to be part of it. Usually the person giving the shower would welcome the help. Share some of your ideas with her.
Thank her and say “why don’t we work together on this “
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“I appreciate your offer, but I would like [person] to handle the decorations for this event.”
Tell her shes welcome to be involved in the process but that you have an idea set in your mind and a direction you want to go in for decoration. If she gets upset about it thats her loss, its about you and the baby, all final decisions should go to you. Hope it works itself out
I think it is a lovely gesture ,can’t you do it together.
So, other people throw a baby shower FOR you. You don’t get a say in the decorations. Maybe she is extending an olive branch in order to BUILD a relationship with you. She probably doesn’t really like you and she realizes that you are going to be the mother of her grandchild and she’s trying to make an effort. If you throw it in her face, there is no chance for a relationship with her.
Tell her thanks but no thanks…you have already decided the theme…but she can help decorate
Its supposed to be thrown for you. Usually a surprise.
Supposed to be fun too.
Sounds like control issues or ungratefulness to me.
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When I was young my friends, & my mom threw me my wedding and baby showers. Work friends did the same. It was a total honor that anyone would be so kind. Don’t reject your MIL, even if your tastes clash. In the long run she’ll be there for you, her son, and all your future little ones. 
With an attitude like that she doesn’t deserve a shower!!!
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Say: I feel like decorating is something I want to do because I want it a certain way. Thanks for offering. Would you like to bring your delish potato salad?
Oh for the love of God. Let her do something for you. One day you will need her. If they don’t look up to your standards tell your friends the truth. Your mother in law was in charge. Crustaceans wrong with us can’t accept love or attention. Must always be in charge. Bet you the kind to tell your man you don’t need him. You can do it yourself if things are not done just the way you like. That’s why our men leave us. Always bitching and complaining. Sit down put your feet up and enjoy the fact that someone wants to do for you.
Isn’t about some one else hosting a baby shower? Not the mom? I must be old school
Tell her your bff & u already discussed & planned it out. Put her in charge of something else.
I haven’t read any comments there are so many but girl you need to learn to pick your battles.
Why are u in charge of anything. Baby showers are thrown by others not the receiver
Get a professional in to do it, she can talk yo the event decorator or event manager.
Put your foot down now or she’ll rule your life. Tell her that you want some input too, it’s your baby.
Dites lui simplement ce que vous nous dites i.e. que c’est important pour vous de le faire vous même pour votre bébé à venir. C’est simple et clair a moins d’avoir une belle mère intrusive et envahissante qui veut prendre plus de place que vous. Je souhaite qu’elle ne soit pas ainsi
Why would you be throwing yourself a shower?
a little tacky no???
Who baby is this any way?
I would of loved to have someone do a baby shower for mine and my husband first born but nobody offered to throw me one most people told my husband to take a dna test when our daughter was born. He never did and I wouldn’t of cared to have him do one but it still hurts my feelings so even though you might not like what she does I would appreciate it.
Well maybe you buy the decorations and ask her to help you put it up. Problem solved I think.
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Decorate the day before n when she comes it’s done your way
Wow I didn’t know the mother to be gave her own baby shower.
Ne honest with her and talk things through, she’s trying to be helpful
She had her chance with her children.it is your baby your turn.Eh
That would be rude. Let her do it. You migh love it . She wants to help you
Tell her your theme and ideas.
I see you are being totally selfish. My goodness the shower will come and go get off your high horse
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Maybe a suggestion or two on what you want
If u dont hold now u wont do it later. So now is ur chance to make ur stand
Let you mother in law do it…period.
As I observe things seem to be very different from when I got married and had baby shower’s … The girls want it their way and direct all the details ….
Be honest with her and tell her how you feel! There’s nothing wrong with your request. You are not excluding her so shouldn’t be an issue.
Best thing to do is to just tell her you want to be in charge and you don’t mind her helping but it will be done the way you want it. Has to be honest you’re going to have her around for a long time
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You will forget the decorations the day you have your baby. Probably before. Let grandma do everything.
Why complain ?? This just might be what brings you together. I’m sure if she’s excited it’ll be all good. Cups hafe full not hafe empty. This is nickel and dime. When it’s quarters complain. That what my dad use to tell me. Good luck
If you don’t get rid of the control issue within yourself, you are headed down a road you are paving. You are going to destroy your family relationships along with a marriage or two. It’s not okay. Let her do this & just go with it.
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As long as you are paying do what you want.Now if Mother in law paying that’s her call.
You’re an ungrateful wretch, control freak.
Who is giving you the shower? If your not giving your self the shower and PAYING FOR IT GROW UP YOUR GOUNG TO BE A MOTHER. IT WONT HURT YOU TO ACT LIKE real adult. Let her do it. It’s a shower for the baby NOT YOU. GROW UP NOW.
Let her do it. Relax and if anything goes awry it’s her fault.
Tell her the decorations are already planned, but she could help you set up.
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Tell here, you already have a theme for your baby shower, so I can use your help with bring that theme to life and input on ways to make it pop. I can show you want I picked and WE can go from there, but I already have my theme.
Are your throwing your own shower?
Regardless, it’s actually a nice gesture for your MIL to offer to decorate for your shower… especially if you’re not that close. This may be her trying to bridge a divide and get on better footing with you before you bring her grand baby into the world.
If you’re throwing your own shower… it might be a lot less stressful for you not to mention cheaper, to let her help out. Just tell her what it is you want, or supply her with the things you want to decorate with. Or if it’s easier… tell her what you absolutely DO NOT want.
Or if you doing the decorating is very important to you, just tell her it is already all in hand but if she could help with something else, that would be fantastic. Like helping with food or making a list of gifts and givers so you can be sure to thank everyone. I’m sure she probably just wants to be involved and feel useful.
If someone else is throwing the shower as would be usual… tell her thanks, but someone else is organising it and you don’t want to step on toes by insisting they let her decorate, you have very little control over events but will tell the organisers to call her if there is anything they need help with.
I get not wanting to be to involved with a MIL or having an overbearing one etc… I really do… but you don’t want to be the DIL who snubs any attempt or offer of friendship as that will just cause problems between you and your partner, she is his mum at the end of the day and I’m sure it would mean a lot to him if she was included in some way that keeps everyone happy and you less stressed x