My Birthday is next Saturday. I asked off for the 4th so I could have a 3day weekend and take myself to the beach. (5.5 hr drive from AZ) However, I am feeling really guilty about not taking my 5yr old daughter. Dad and I have 50/50 and he has asked me not to take her due to safety concerns. He’s worried about something happening. I get it. I want to take her but at the same time I do kind of want to go alone. Am I being selfish by not taking my 5yr old with me? I don’t care if its cold and rainy I really just want to sit on the beach and listen to the waves and relax. I literally don’t have any other plans besides that.
Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. I feel guilty for not taking my daughter on my birthday vacation
We went to Disneyworld without kids and didn’t feel bad. You have to treat yourself too.
My birthday is also Saturday so happy birthday! But I say no you’re NTA bc I would love to have a weekend getaway at the beach. You deserve to spoil yourself sometimes too.
I mean, I get the safety concerns but people take their children places all day every day. If you really want to take her, take her. If you want time alone, don’t. It may be easier for you to not create a potential argument with dad and just go have some time to yourself.
Sometimes we just need a break…
You should allow yourself to have “me time”. Don’t feel guilty.
You will be an even better mama if you take some alone time. No guilt mama!
Don’t let your mom guilt get you. You deserve time to recharge. You know your daughter will have fun and be safe with her dad while
You get time to practice self care. Plan something fun like pedis and ice cream with your mini when you get back !
Sometimes you need this kind of self care so that you can be the best mama to your kids.
We go on adult only vacations once a year. We make that time and promise for ourselves. Just because you have kids doesn’t mean you’re never allowed to be kid less or go places without them. My son is eight and he stays at my parents while we go away and a week flies by so fast he’s completely unphased. We’ve been doing adult only vacations for the past five years and I still feel the mom guilt you are feeling but even my parents have to reassure me that it’s completely fine and healthy for your relationship. It’s one of the main reasons my husband and I have such a good relationship still. So take the time and enjoy it of course you’re going to miss your babies but they deserve a happy mom Who makes time for herself as well! There are always going to be judgmental people who will try to shame you and make you feel bad but what people don’t realize is that it actually helps women become better mothers when they have time to themselves. Enjoy every second of it and you can always call/FaceTime them every day!
We’re moms, we feel guilty all the time.
Please allow yourself some me-time, it’s important, you’ll feel rejuvenated.
I’m doing the same thing in June. 3 days, just me and my 2 best friends at the beach for my birthday. No partners, no kids. And I couldn’t be more thrilled. Taking care of your daughter is important but in order to take care of her properly, you need to take care of you too. Enjoy your birthday! She and you will be just fine
Show yourself some love and take this time for you. BUt have a whole hearted plan that when capable take her the next time you go. You’ll enjoy both times for different reasons.
Its never selfish to administer self care… everyone needs a break sometimes!
Momma’s deserve a break! Take it and enjoy yourself.
Take the time for your self!
Don’t feel bad, every mom and dad need time to themselves.
You have plenty of time to take her places. Enjoy this time taking care of you.
Mama you are feeling this way because of mom guilt. And I wish someone would have told me this everytime I felt bad not doing things with my kiddo, but it’s totally okay to have some YOU time. Whether it’s just sitting at a beach or going to an amusement park or a vacation like Hawaii. Having this you time is crucial and important. Also sounds responsible and respectful of your daughter and her father. You can always take her somewhere when its safer. Go have your weekend. Enjoy it!
Just enjoy your birthday get away. You can take your daughter at another time. It’s ok to have some you time.
We all need alone time! Go enjoy yourself. Her dad will take care of her!! You never know the next time you will get this chance!!
Take care of your self momma
Take your break. You’re allowed “me” time! But, her dad not wanting you to take your own child to the beach? Wtf!? Is she not allowed to go swimming in a pool either? Gtfoh
You are a better Mom when you take time to be you. Enjoy.
I just went on vacation for my birthday last month. I went to the beach so i was hesitant on taking my toddlers because having 2 toddlers near water as a single mom scares me. I took my older kids but left the toddlers with my ex. I was sad and it was the longest I’ve been away from them but I was a le to enjoy my time without fear of something happening. Do it. Treat yourself to some quality alone time for your birthday
You need you time
Don’t feel guilty your child needs time away from you as you do them enjoy your time away your deserve it
Go by yourself and enjoy adult time. Are you going to Rocky Point?
Don’t feel guilty at all. We all need some alone time. Go and enjoy your time!
You are not selfish. I was of feeling excited yesterday because I can have alone time as I have my chemo today .
It’s your birthday no hers go yourself if she throws a bitch tantrum so be it
Go!
have a great time!
Don’t ever question needing time for yourself! The Beach is the perfect place to regroup, rejuvenate, relax and enjoy yourself.
Absolutely not selfish. You deserve a nice break mumma , take care of yourself. One day you could take her with you
Take the time for you and give her another time (perhaps her birthday) you can go to the beach.
A 5 1/2 hour trip each way is a lot for a five year old. And a long weekend is such a quick trip. Since you know she’ll be well cared for, go on and enjoy your trip. We all need some “alone time” every now and then. Later on, take her on some day trips without such a long ride. You’ll all be much happier in the long run!!!
Go enjoy that free time!!! Recharge and grab some sun for me too! do it for all the moms!
You are NOT SELFISH!! Just when u come back do a little something with her. But no girl u go enjoy that beach, enjoy a margarita, lol❤️
Leave kiddo with someone safe and enjoy your birthday.
I hope you have the best time. Mom guilt is the worst. Do not let it ruin your “me time” or birthday! Use the time to recharge. You and your daughter will both benefit in the long run. Also, HAPPY FREAKING BIRTHDAY!!
Mom guilt sucks big time, I get it whenever I leave the house without my 2 year old. I always complain I don’t get me time but it’s me not wanting to leave her home stuck in a house while I’m out enjoying myself lol. Her father would watch her no issue because I let him go do whatever he does with friends but I just can’t bring myself to leave her behind without thinking of her every second.
Enjoy your time alone. It seems like dad takes care of your baby. Take care of yourself queen
Hell no u need u time too go enjoy relax
Don’t feel guilty for taking time out for yourself!! As parents, we give all of our time to our kids, career, etc. But, we also need to take care of us too. Enjoy that time when you can, even if it’s just for a couple of hours or a couple of days.
What kind of dangers ?
It not selfish to have me time we all need it and if u want take her with.
You aren’t selfish.she will be fine with her dad
Never feel guilty about needing time for yourself.
No you need alone time
Take this time to refill your cup. Go!!!
Go and enjoy yourself…you deserve it
Not a all Honey , your child will be fine with Daddy you go have a wonderful time and when you get back you and your child can continue the party fun and do something nices in your local town ect , have fun happy Birthday beautiful
Take her to a closer beach later, a 5 yr old would not like that long of a trip and it’s good to have alone time. My kids (5 and 6) would be wanting me to swim with them, build castles, I’d be watching them the entire time and anxious if they went separate ways. She’s in good hands with dad, so enjoy your relaxing beach trip, and happy birthday
Whenever I take a birthday trip, I just make sure to celebrate with my daughter at home too. Usually we get ice cream and have a movie night.
Do not feel guilty! Moms need time away once in a while!
Mamas need time to themselves. Fight the mom guilt and have a wonderful birthday
Don’t feel guilty at all mumma !! If it’s one thing I’ve learnt now my kids are older I wish I had of spent at least a couple of hours a week or even a month to myself just to feel human again , refresh and relax!! Enjoy
It is not selfish BUT her dad asking you not to take your daughter on your weekend on a trip would not be OK with me… that said… Happy Birthday!
I wish I could do this! Don’t feel guilty momma! You need some time alone! Enjoy and happy birthday
Happy Birthday enjoy your day. You deserve to spend it as you wish. Especially if dad is on kid duty. No worries
If you don’t care of yourself, you can’t take care of anyone else
Hey if her dad wants her for the days you are gone…go have fun! Mamas need breaks too
I totally understand because I am the exact same way and feel bad when I do things without my kids but you shouldn’t! Take the time to relax and recharge and have some time for just you.
My doctor told me because I live a stressful life that I need to make my way to the Beach so the stress doesn’t continue to build up, she said we need and deserve time, so go have Fun!!!
Honestly hun-take the break I absolutely hate being away from my daughter but every mom needs me time
We all need breaks but the mom guilt is a very real emotion. I think you need to get to the bottom of why you need to drive 5.5 hours away to sit on a beach alone on your birthday. If you feeling down and need help, seek it. Take a friend.
You’re not selfish or a bad mom for wanting time for yourself. Enjoy your birthday💗
I went on a long weekend away without my 14 year old son. He lost the ability to go for to behavior and school grades. I had mom guilt for a while but I’m all honesty, it felt great!!
I also went last year on an overnight trip by myself and my son stayed home again. It was the best trip! I was completely alone until I was on my way back and picked up someone ( reason for my over night trip)
Enjoy your day! Happy birthday.
You’re not a bad parent for needing time to yourself, everyone does. And if you bring a 5 year old with you the last thing you’re gonna do is relax. Enjoy your little trip and celebrate with her another way when you’re back
Go yourself you need this more than her
Go enjoy yourself! Your daughter will be with her dad, not like your pawning her off… You and her will have plenty more weekend getaways! Happy birthday!!
I’ve taken my daughter to Cali beaches with me a hundred times over the years by myself with no safety concerns at all. As long as you are aware of your surroundings, like you should be everywhere anyway. But on that note, it’s also not selfish to want to go by yourself. Time to yourself should be mandatory for Mom’s.
Take the break. We deserve it. My friend and i are doing a Momcation next week
Not selfish at all. Girl…enjoy it
Girl it’s YOUR day! U need a break as much as u need your kiddo! Xx
Go on and have a blast
Go have fun, mom’s deserve some time
No!! Your not selfish, we all need a little time for ourselves , happy birthday and enjoy your mini vacation
Shis a bad time of year to sit on the beach on the west co
You deserve the break. It is perfectly OK for moms to have alone time, free time, down time. Obviously we all feel guilty because we are moms but we have to keep ourselves mentally and physically healthy so we can be there for our children. When I take trips without my child I also do something special with her before or after or I take her on a trip she would enjoy.
Do it. You can do something the next weekend you’re off
Moms are around to enjoy themselves too. Dad is offering to make sure she is taken care of and you both seem on the same page for him keeping her and her staying safe so just do it. Bring something back for her. You’ll have plenty of time to do vacations with her
If it’s occurring on your time, it’s not really his call. In the end it’s your decision. She’d probably enjoy the beach more once it’s nice out though. If you need this for you, that’s okay.
Absolutely not, enjoy your alone time! Your allowed to have a break and have time to yourself! Have fun and happy birthday!
Not selfish at all, mom guilt just weighs on us even if it’s not always valid. Enjoy yourself & Happy Birthday!
Take the trip! She won’t even remember it!
Not at all selfish. You deserve me time
Not being selfish. You both need time alone. She is in good hands.
Your not being selfish, your being cautious. Keep in mind the cartels are active in R.P.
Its natural to feel that way, but don’t. It’s not selfish if it’s needed. Self care is important for mommas.
Nah mama take your day for you
Not selfish at all. I envy you
You deserve a break but him basically forbidding you from taking her needs some attention.
No. Go. She’s with dad.
She’s 5. She will be fine. Enjoy yourself!!
Do it! For you! It’s important for women to take care of themselves too:) Have cake time with your little girl at the first opportunity after:) Happy Birthday!
Never feel guilty for wanting or needing a break! As a mom of 7, we take 2 vacations a year, one adult only trip and one with all the kiddos. Take lots of pictures to show her and bring back souvenirs to make her feel special!
Don’t feel guilty about it! You do deserve it and the fact that dad doesn’t want you to take her. That should make it easier to not feel guilty.
Not selfish at all. You deserve time to yourself