I feel like my boyfriend doesn't like my kids, advice?

I was one of those kids for two stepparents and it sucked not being appreciated or loved. Neither my mom’s husband or my dad’s wife liked us and they would all fight about who would take us, as in, none of them wanted us. I was 3 when they all got divorced and remarried. It was a harrowing way to grow up to feel like a guest in your own homes. If she truly loves her kids, Op needs to have a serious talk with the bf and cut him loose if she has to. It will all erupt when the teen years come, if not sooner.

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You will really mess your kids up psychologically if you continue this relationship! Nothing should ever come between you and your kids and if your man shows signs now it will just get worse. You will feel guilty your whole life and likely die lonely and in despair! Just my opinion but I speak from experience and could probably cite research if I had the time. Good luck, it’s not easy but you don’t get a redo when it comes to raising kids! :heart:

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Girl protect your children!

If you’re picking up on this feeling so are your kids.

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If you feel like that, imagine how your boys feel. :expressionless: He isn’t worth the misery!

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i’ve had at least 4 relationships fall by the wayside because of a similar situation. even though i told each of the men in my life,at that time, that my children were and always would be, number 1 i guess they didn’t believe it. go figure, lol.

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He needs to bond with them one on one. Its not their fault and they come first. And yes maybe a little resentment is normal…but Its up to him to change that feeling not you. He knew the situation so he needs to commit to the kids as well as you.

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boyfriend would be leaving! Kids come before him!

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Aww helll to the no! You need to tell your husband to knock his shit off! Those kids should not be treated any differently. Period! I’m sure your kids feel some type of way too. It’s pretty disgusting that he acts this way! I’d say drop his assss!

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I have 3 kids from a previous relationship…My number one personal rule when I started dating again, was that whoever I was dating I would have absolutely no tolerance of them disrespecting my babies. Period! They are a part of me. My bf of 2 and a half years has stepped up and is very involved with my babies. I’m grateful for him. But if was any other way, we would not still be together.

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He is never going to be more than he is. Your kids deserve better than him. Don’t do that to your kids. It’s not fair

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If the guy is a good guy then I’d seek therapy and some counseling to help both your kids and the bf to get attached and for a healthy relationship.

If you have exhausted all routes and this is still an issue I wouldn’t stick around. Your kids come first, they shouldn’t grow up feeling like a burden. They are innocent and need to be loved, needed and wanted by all in their family. It should always be their safe place growing up.

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He should love your children as his own, point blank. There’s no excuse. Don’t have someone around your kids if he doesn’t want to be there. Your kids will resent you for it in the long run because they’ll know.

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I am so sorry for your kids that you would stay with a man that encourages you to spend less time with your kids. But you love him. Will you leave him? Probably not. These kids can feel it. They know he doesn’t want them around. Don’t do that to them. They don’t deserve this. Don’t out your feelings for this man over the needs of your children. They will always know you chose him over them.

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Don’t just “drop him”, Jesus christ people. You need to sit down and talk with him about it. It sounds to me like he’s treating you and your kids right, he’s just struggling with some shit personally. And if you don’t talk to him about it he’s not going to know it’s a problem. He may not even realize what he says bothers you. Communication goes a long, long way.

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I’d be single real quick if someone told me that.
Children should always come first. You need to sit him down and talk to him.

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Was he acting like this toward your children before you decided to have a baby with him???

If he was, this is on you. You made a poor choice to have a child and be linked to someone who treats your other children that way.

My mom’s then boyfriend, now husband treated me like shit, and she let him. My mother and I were very close before he was in the picture and frankly she did not do her job in communicating her expectations from him toward me.

If I were you, I’d tell him that he has a choice to make…love ALL of your children for who they are and take his role as a major influence on all of their lives seriously…or leave.

No man/relationship is worth giving your children lifelong self esteem and anxiety issues.

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That is not normal… it’s pretty sad actually… and the fact it’s gone on so long is sad for your other 2…

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Dang that sucks especially since you just had a baby with him thats a tough one but me personally if i felt that way for a second with someone i was in a relationship with they would be gone so quick fortunately i got lucky where whoever i dated and my now husband have always treated my kids as if they were theres

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This is not normal. It is very toxic to you and the environment your children are living in. Children can feeeeel the animosity. Even if you’re current boyfriend makes an effort to hide/disguise the annoyance. Children always know when they’re unwanted.

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Yeah that’s a big NO for me. My child deserves loves, cuddles, affirmations, close relationships and meaningful bonds. This man doesn’t seem interested in any of that? It would hurt me terribly if someone said to send my kids away all week and only get them on weekends. Why even have a baby with someone that doesn’t already treat your first kids as if they are his own? Imagine how your children feel. I have a dad but I also had a step dad. I was very close with my step dad, I valued that relationship dearly.
It kind of seems like you’ve put this man before the best interests of the kids from the start. You should have noticed the way he was to your kids long before you had another kid with him……

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Yikes, yeah that’s not normal. My dad (stepdad but we don’t say step) always treated us like his own kids. I would definitely talk to him about how he comes across and if his attitude stays the same, it’s time to kick him to the curb. The way he treats your children will have a huge impact on their lives. And they will resent you for staying with a man that was constantly annoyed with them. I’m sorry you’re dealing with this :slightly_frowning_face:

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I’m going to be the unliked opinion here … But, mother of 5 only 2 of which are my biological children. Anytime you take on the role of “mom or dad” to children that are not yours, it’s NOT hard… It freaking sucks!!! The kids hate you, the ex in laws(kids grandparents) hate you and even your spouse hates you sometimes. All the while you’re just trying to be “mom or dad”!! It’s especially tough when you have your own children living with you also. No matter what you do, someone ALWAYS thinks you’re favoring your own!! Good news is, it does get better!! If your boyfriend loves you… He will keep trying to bond with your children… If he’s going to be part of your life … He will need to accept and love them just he does you!! I don’t agree with saying maybe you should only get them on the weekends… That’s not the arraignments you had in place for your children so he needs to respect you and try bonding with them but honestly… It’s NOT uncommon for there to be some sorta feelings about them also. Please try to keep encouraging him and your children to bond of you plan to stay with him. I wish you the best of luck.

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im going to suggest that he is probably feeling overwhelmed. he went from having no kids to 3 kids pretty quick (my situation as well). being a step parent isnt easy. im going to guess that the emotional history between all of you doesnt help either. flip the situation around and think about how you would feel and what you might need. my husband and i always ask “what can i do for you?” and sometimes we just need a coffee, a hug, a moment alone, whatever. that little question can make a big difference and we feel more united and less divided.

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That’s awful of him to say. I would absolutely feel offended. They are all your babies and they all deserve their time with you. How dare he ask that of you…smh if he was a real man or father he would enjoy all the time he gets with all of them. Your son probably just feels his negative energy…I think any kid would lash out at that point :pensive:

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You should talk him and also if been like this why would you have a baby with him

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He’s giving you signals and you aren’t catching on. Please remember your children depend on YOU to always be their voice and protect them so if they start feeling or seeing that he treats his bio child better and he will eventually later on then they aren’t going to trust him OR YOU. You have some huge decisions to make and I honestly wish you the absolute best.

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why would you be with someone who treats your kids differently? if he acts like that while you’re around just imagine how he acts when you aren’t.

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You need to get rid of the boyfriend!!!
No ifs ands ors buts

If he can’t love your kids like his kids you DONT need him !!!

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Poor kids. Do the right thing, put them first and end the relationship. It’s really damaging for kids to experience resentment from a step parent

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Sit him down and tell him straight up that your kids come first and foremost. FOREVER. Tell him that you’re not willing to force your children to live in a place they don’t feel welcome and unconditionally loved, and with a person who makes them feel like a burden.

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Sounds like he hasn’t bonded with them.

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I wouldn’t stay with someone like that. Kids come first. You can find a man who will treat you and your kids the way you deserve to be treated.

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DO NOT JUST GET RID OF HIM. I say that in all caps because every friekin woman I see in mom groups goes straight to ridding of a man without even trying to solve the issues first. Sit down with him and let him know what he says and how he acts is not okay with you and yall gotta work on having a better family dynamic. He dosnt sound like a bad man I think he is just overwhelmed because that is alot to take on especially if he’s wanted you in your previous marriage. Communication is key babe. Have a good talk

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He doesnt take time and love them but wants to discipline them? Not acceptable! To me that is considered being mean. You need to tell him he has to step up or step out. You and your children are a package deal. I cant imagine that he is going to be a loving father to his own child with you. Usually a truly loving father will love all children. And to suggest just sending them to stay all the time except weekends…and saying it is going to be a long 14 years…I would throw him out on his head!!!

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Ummm yes be worried! If you sense it then them kids sense it.
He either needs to grow up or go! There’s zero chance, no matter how much I loved someone, I’d let them treat my children with anything except complete respect and loved them like his own! ZERO CHANCE! Then kids will resent you if you keep allowing this nonsense. Why would you even think this was normal at all?

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No. That’s not normal. You and your children are a package deal. If he can’t RESPECT your children then he isn’t respecting you. I had a child from a previous marriage. We were a duo. Not one without the other. My 2nd, and still current, husband adores him. He adopted our son actually. If he had said anything to the liking that he expected him out of the house at 18, he would have been given the boot. A child is a LIFETIME commitment. I dated a few people before I dated my now husband. If they even halfgeartedly said in a joking way anything derogatory towards children in general, they had to go. It’s all in or not at all. You need to have a coming to Jesus conversation with your s.o. Now, not later. Don’t be wasting any more of your, or your children’s, time and effort on some one who is temporary because sister, your children are FOREVER!!

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You need to express these concerns with him. Let him know what he’s doing make you feel the way you’re feeling. Tell him you’d like for him to spend one on one time with the older two kids not just his biological child. He knew your kids were part of the package deal he needs to get over being immature. It’s not your kids fault who their dad is, he needs to make them feel included. And not make snide comments to you, they’re rude and uncalled for.

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What he’s doing isn’t cool and if he can do that and be sarcastic with your 2 oldest, he can and could and possibly will with your youngest. Have a convo with him and if things don’t change, you need to do what’s right by your kids no matter how much it hurts or how much you love him. They don’t deserve to have that annoyance or negativity towards them

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If he can’t accept your kids from a previous relationship he’s not worth it!!! He knew you had kids prior to being with you. Either treat them as his own or tell him to kick rocks! Kids can tell when they aren’t wanted. Don’t put your babies through that.

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Girl listen to me . You need to leave him , any “man” who thinks that other children are “burdens “ to them are no good to be around your kids . Coming from someone who was treated differently bc I wasn’t biologically theirs DOES hurt and cause issues . You need to put your children first .

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You and your kids from a previous marriage are a package deal. I would sit down and have a conversation with the boyfriend about how you feel. Kids pick up on everything and they will notice things especially as they get older.

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Sounds like resentment, friend, very difficult to overcome without help. It will definitely affect the kids. I suggest counseling

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It’s soooo difficult to blend a family - and when the other parent of the child is involved - more difficult. Just be sure to set clear standards for what you expect from your boyfriend regarding your children. The sooner the better.

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He should love your children as extensions of you. I would never allow a man to make a home where my kids are not 100 percent comfortable. And idk how he is so comfortable correcting your son and not connecting with him. :woman_shrugging:t2:

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Personally I would leave. I have a step dad and he has always treated me like his own flesh and blood. I wouldn’t except any different for my children. He knew about the kids before yall got together so if he can’t act like a man why stay?

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I’m pretty sure he didn’t start acting like that after she had a child with him. The same attitude was there before. Not trying to sound judgmental but if she’s getting the vibe, the children are getting the vibe. His ass would be vibing right out the door.

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The best thing is communication. Tell him that the stuff he says is hurtful and that it feels like you don’t like the kids. Be open and honest. Don’t leave him like most of these people are saying. Communication first, then if that doesn’t work try therapy and if that doesn’t work then leave him, but only if nothing works and you feel like he still doesn’t like your kids. Your kids should come first before any man, but if your saying that he treats you and the kids good try and work it out. Try to see why he is saying the stuff he does, maybe he just doesn’t know how to deal with the situation.

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Did you not see this before you had another baby with him? Get out this is a disaster waiting to happen for your children!!!

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This is not normal. If you can sense this, so can your babies. Your partner should view your babies as an extension of you and should love them as if they are his own. He cannot have you without them and it sounds like that’s what he wants. With all the respect in the world, It doesn’t sound like you love him, it sounds more like codependency. Leave him.

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If he can’t love your children as his own then he isn’t the right one. He knew you had children when he got into the relationship and it is not your kids fault that your relationship didn’t work out, they are going through enough of a hard time being shared as is… He is not a good guy if he can’t treat your kids like his… And you need to stand up for your children…

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Don’t drop him, talk to him. Ask him to spend time with your kids cause at the end of the day he choose you & your kids. I met my husband 30 yrs ago when I was just coming out of a bad marriage and with 2 kids, ages 9 mos and 2 yrs. He was and still is one of my brothers best friends. Making a long story short, he knew my kids before ever meeting me thru my brother & mother. With that being said he said he married me because he first fell in love with my kids then me. That’s the way it should be… he helped me raise my boys into good honest men & 30 yrs later we are helping to raise our 5 grandkids. Now that’s a man worth keeping :blue_heart:

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He doesn’t truly love you if he doesn’t love your children. It will never work, and will ruin your relationship with your children in the long run. It’s very toxic behavior for your boyfriend to act like that. But you could try talking about how you feel with him and see if he makes a genuine difference. A line made between children will always be there. If he doesn’t change and you stay with him and he continues to treat your kids like that, I promise your kids won’t think you love them very much. I’m 24 and am dealing with this right now. It’s sad :disappointed:

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He has no right to talk to your kids that way. Put your children before any man. I don’t care how much he loves you or how well he treats you. Your children come first, PERIOD.

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Did he act differently before the baby arrived?..If not, you already knew what you were signing up for. Above all, put your kids first. If he loved you through and through, he’d love ALL your babies.

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My 3 children from my previous marriage don’t question where they stand with my new husband. He is their dad. They all adore each other. Since day 1. And my kids are jerks man.

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The fact that you can lay down and make a baby with a man that makes you feel this way about YOUR kids is beyond me. And okay maybe he just started this attitude the fact that you are confused on what to do :unamused: drop his ass and put your kids FIRST. Your son can be acting out cuz he feels it himself and it is messing with him psychologically. Sorry Honey that he loves me attitude ain’t it. If a man ain’t going to respect or love the children you dont need to be with him period!!! No if and or buts about it. I

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Any man that acts like your kids are a burden shouldn’t be around them period. Jealousy is a horrible thing. He probably treats them different because you dated his friend and those kids are by him. It’s a constant reminder that he has to see everyday. Your child is acting out because of the man who is not his father is in your life.

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When I chose my wife, I chose her kids too and I make sure they know that. If he loves you but doesn’t love your kids, does he really love you. He knew you had kids. Has he always acted this way towards them?

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My husband and I just got married, I have a 6 yr old and 3 years old from a previous relationship and am due in Feb with our son.
It’s definitely been a struggle. I was also one of 2 kids from a previous relationship and my step mom saved our family. She’s a Saint.
It may just take more time and it never helps when the kids have behaviors. We have been dealing with my 3 yr old sons behaviors for years now and their father is still not helpful and it’s a frustration that my husband shares with me but he is very supportive and has even said he wishes we could have them full time so they have more consistency.
In the end you know him the best so I’d say try to find ways you can facilitate some one on one bonding experiences with them. My husband has made little connections with my kids on his own and their relationships have grown slowly over time.
It’s nice to watch but maybe he needs some help initiating it?
Hope that helped! Good luck :heart:

The kids will pick up on his annoyance with them and it will make them not want to be around him which means not being around you also. So, I guess you have to decide if you want your kids to feel unwanted in your/their home.

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If this is the way it was b4 u had a kid with him then u probably should’ve told him 2 kick rocks long time ago! Your a package deal take it or leave it! He should accept your kids no matter what especially now that you guys have a child together!! I mean it’s great that he gets on 2 ur 7yr old bout disrespecting you but all the same that’s what he’s doing to your kids but not paying them ne attention!

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He gets a two week break every month. If he can’t make that work then mom has some decisions to make. It’s time to have some real talk.

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If you feel it, the kids feel it. He may be stressed with the new baby but if it doesnt change then I would bring it up. I feel like everyone deserves a little bit of adjustment when a baby comes but he can’t keep that up forever. It’s going to hurt their feelings in the long run and they will resent you and him both.

He may resent them because he resents your ex… who was also his friend and it needs to be addressed~swiftly and directly. Otherwise, you may have to end that live-in relationship with him ASAP and give him visitation time with your child. It will not get better if left unaddressed because there’s unresolved anger, bitterness and resentment on his part.

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I love all the drop him comments… misery loves company. Anywho. I’m in the exact same situation and my bf is an amazing person. I communicated my feelings and he corrected his self that day 6 months ago and has not went back to that thinking since then. This is a very big transition that will take time and adjustments. Keep communicating!!! Don’t drop anyone until you feel like that’s what you should do. Trust your gut.

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Not good. I’m a step mom. And my husband is a step dad…it’s extremely important to treat them all the same!! Praying for you

Since when did you feel him starting to act like this, coz you had a kid with him. This is so unfair towards your kids. If he loves you he should love your kids period no questions asked. I’m getting so annoyed by your post really I’m a stepmom aswell so I know what I’m talking about. If you see it your kids definitely feel it.

And don’t you think it was a good idea to have that figured out before having another child? So you would stay with him just because he’s good to you? What about your kids? He clearly doesn’t want them in the picture, he told you directly to your face? What more are you waiting for? People are rushing so much to start another family and to get in another relationship without considering their children first, I just don’t get that

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someone who expresses themselves towards your children that way… is such a bad sign. Your kids FEELINGS come first. Please re-evaluate your relationship. You shouldn’t have to straighten out an adult, he knows how to behave he’s trying to see if he can get you to do it, get rid of him.

Talk to him about how you feel .and talk to him about what you want. Those are your babies they come with you as a full package and be treated accordingly. If he cannot except that then .well try to suggest counseling.if not well the rest is for you to decide

Kids are #1. Counselor maybe? I wouldn’t be with someone who doesnt love my kids. If youre picking up on it, your kids probably are too. Good luck to you. Hope you guys find peace and love.

Your son may be lashing out because he senses the tension and annoyance he feels he’s causing your boyfriend (poor baby ) to have to feel that way in his own home. You need to have serious talks with your boyfriend… if you don’t protect your children who will :pray::pensive:

Sorry Girl I’ve been in the situation I’m gonna be real it doesn’t get any better on either side if you stay they’re neglected if you leave then you’re a baby with him is neglected these are the moments we just got a put your big girl pants on and just be strong In whatever your decision.

No it’s not normal . How can you profess that he is good to you if he treats your other children this way . Did you see the way he treated them before you had a baby with him ? I suggest you go to consult a therapist to help you and all your children as it doesn’t get better with time or as the kids age . Your son could be acting out because of the way he feels . Any man that tells you to give your children away ( even to their own father ) has no love for you . We have a blended family of 5 and it’s a very hard challenge even when we love the other children as our own . Good luck and don’t put up with this at your kids expense.

It seems to me from one part of your comments that he is trying to help the child have better respect and manners. He shows he loves your son by wanting him to be a better person so he uses fair discipline to teach him a better way. I think you take it as he doesn’t like your son but I see it from a different view. If he feels you are being critical maybe he thinks it would be better if the kids were with their bio father more but he may not mean he doesn’t want them. I think you should talk to him about how you feel; clear the air so to speak and see what he really feels, not just what you may be mis-interpreting his feelings.

Leave. Run. There’s no way this should ever be allowed. You can not keep an eye on those kids 24/7 so who knows what he’s doing when you’re not home

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If he’s just a boyfriend then it’s not a huge deal in my opinion. Kids are annoying at times as long as he respects them and they respect him then that counts for something. It’s hard to just love your bf/ gf kids as your own. He is in a relationship with you not your kids. And if he really has a problem he would say something to you. Or leave himself. Maybe he just wants the time to be a family for a bit you him and the new baby.
Plus if he is taking time to talk to your child about his behavior and caring enough to put him in time he obviously cares. He probs just isn’t one to get attached easily.

Bring it up with him and suggest family couseling. If he really wants to respect you- like he says- he will agree… and it will help the kids too.

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I had an ex boyfriend that made me feel the same way about my daughter, she hated him, and now I’m better of without him.

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If anyone treated my children this way and said those things I’d 100000% be done with the relationship. The fact that he is telling you to have them only on weekends is disgusting. He knew you all were a package deal and now he doesn’t want that. Children are also intuitive and pick up on this, I can only imagine the mental health issues they are going to have hearing these things.
Smh.

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I have a step dad who went up to bat for me every time my mother and I would get into it… growing up he was the peace keeper… he showed me things that dads are suppose to show their kids. And even tho he’s my “step” dad… I have always referred to him as dad. He’s my real father cause he took the time to be one to me.

I would have resented my mother SO MUCH if she chose someone who was not willing and able to help raise me the way he did. Never raised his voice at me or my mother and never touched me or my mother not one time.

I feel like unless I find someone like my dad, I would rather stay single until my kiddo is 18. I know that’s not an option for everybody but I could never stand being with someone who doesn’t treat my child(ren) as their own or better than their own. It’s not the children’s fault who their dad is or what choices you and their dad made before you found him and I think it’s INCREDIBLY immature that this man might possibly be thinking of the situation this way joking or not.

I would want to know how long they’ve been together, and has he always been annoyed with the kids or just more so after the baby was born? 1) I would never dictate that somebody spend less time with their kids or let anybody tell me how much time I should spend with my kids. That right there would be a no-go for me. Kids should always come first. If he has become more annoyed by them since the baby, I can maybe understand a little. Not sure how much he’s helping out with the new baby. I know some people won’t/don’t like kids that aren’t their own. Still no excuse though. I would never be with somebody or stay with somebody who couldn’t accept all my kids whether they were also his or not. You need to talk to him but don’t give into him. I would never cut my time with my kids just to please some guy no matter how long I was with him.

I only read “I feel like my boyfriend doesn’t like my kids, advice?” and my advice is bye Felicia. No man should come before your kids, period.

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Why are you with him? He knew you had children!!! Your children always come first you need to leave his tired poor butt!!’n

Yikes girl. All I have to say is me and my man got together when my kids were 2 and 5. Main reason I fell in love with him was because of the love he had for my kids and the way he treated them. They are now 11 and 14 and since we have two more kids together and he treats them as his own. Most people don’t even know they aren’t his.

Well, sounds like to me it’s time to have a “Come to Jesus” meeting with him. Don’t go in there guns blazing. BUT I would be channeling my inner mama bear. Just let him know you love him but your babies come first, period. All your babies,not just the one you have with him. I like the counseling idea someone presented earlier, I feel like that could really help. If he refuses counseling or tries to downplay your concerns or ignore them outright… time to tell him to go. You might love him, but your loyalty should be to your children.

No this is not normal. Some clashing in attitude or behavior is normal but just not liking the kids…not ok. Hash things out with your boyfriend, make it clear the kids are extremely important and the “I don’t like them” has got to go. If he can’t respect the kids now he certainly won’t over the years either. I’m not saying he must love em as they are his but umm if you want him in your life he needs to have a better relationship with the kids as well

I would definitely be voicing my feelings to him. When comments are made about your kids getting the weekends with you I would be hurting his feelings… don’t be afraid to get the point across . You’re children will always come first … if that annoys him than he is not the man for you

My ex bf did this and its not okay my new boyfriend treats my kids amazing he is more attached to the youngest as she is here full time and doesnt have a daddy but when she wanted to go to the zoo he took all 4 kids to the zoo he bought them all lunch bought all of them toys and took them to the park later that day. Hes giving you hints and they are not good ones. I loved my ex too but there is someone out there who will love you and your children fully. Wait for that guy. You have to put your kids first always.

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It can’t all be about the child you had with him. You’re other children were there first. They don’t automatically just get tossed aside so you won’t have problems with your “new family”. Cut him loose sooner rather than later. There is a man out there that will love all three of your children as his own. And if not, being a single parent for the safety and well-being of ALL of your children is not the worst thing in the world. Just my opinion and speaking from childhood experience.

If he isn’t wanting to accept your kids then that’s a huge red flag . The kids will eventually feel it and see it . I was in a relationship like that years ago and my girls were not treated the same with my boyfriend or his family it ended up really hurting them and it’s not fair to the children no matter what you feel for him . It’s WRONG

I really don’t like that he said your ex stole years of his life and “only 14 more years” both of those are huge red flags & sounds so selfish. You lose the right to be selfish when you have children. & Kids are a lot more intuitive than you think, if you’ve picked up on that feeling of resentment your kids have noticed. He needs a reality check and very firm boundaries. They don’t deserve to grow up feeling less important than their half sibling because he fathered the sibling but not them. I no longer speak to my father or stepmother for reasons very similar to what your describing above, but I have been incredibly lucky with my step dad, who makes me feel like I am just as much his daughter as his actual sons. Be with someone who makes your children feel loved and included, instead of the one who makes your child feel excluded & unloved. Your life partner will influence the relationship you have with your children.

He would have to check himself in a hurry or check his suitcase and make sure he got everything and gtfo of my house. If a man can’t love my children equally, he’s out. We only have our kids for a short time of their lives and it’s our job to advocate for them and surround them with love and empathy.

I wouldn’t ever be with someone who openly showed hes annoyed with my babies. My step son (he’s 13) and I don’t get along well, never really have, he wants his parents back together. This summer we have had him two weeks on two weeks off which was hard for me, especially when I had my second baby May 30th. I would never treat my step son any different than I greet my own babies though. They don’t deserve that

Ooh the guts to suggest keeping your elder 2 kids away all week and keeping his baby by your side, how inconsiderate … he must have not realized for you all 3 kids are unconditionally loved and same :person_shrugging:

U are a packaged deal with them children and If he can’t treat then with respect then that’s a slap in ur face… ur kids always come first period… my ex who I had two sons with was not nice to my oldest from a previous marriage and I left… now I’m with a man who claims all three of my kids and adores them just like he does me… we actually just got married in June and we all couldn’t be happier… u can find someone that will love and respect all of you… but u first have to respect your children and urself!

Do you want to be heard or do you want my opinion ? I have 2 kids & they come before anyone in this world . Personally I would kindly express myself to him , & if he continued to make me feel that way … he would have to go .

your children deserve better why should they be treated any differently? They will sense his bad vibes and hear his nasty comments and resent you in the long run the man needs to be dashed

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Your kids are going to feel it, probably already do and that’s why the boy is lashing out! It’s not right! I see a lot of people saying “yeah, kids are annoying” and sure they are but that shouldn’t matter. They deserve respect either way and to be shown what a good parent looks like. As parents or step parents we show them how to be good people through our words and actions.

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has he always been like this or just since you had the baby? if it’s just recently, he is likely overwhelmed with having a newborn. men go through changes and bits of depression when babies are born. but if this has always been an ongoing issue, then maybe therapy would be beneficial. it sounds like he treats you good and you love him so if you can work things out, that would be great. kids are annoying. that’s just facts. i think my own kids are annoying lol i have a 9yo step daughter who’s bio walked out and a 2yo bio daughter. they both annoy the shit out of me :rofl::neutral_face: i hope you can work things out :heart::pray:t4:

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