Happened to me and I didn’t leave and both parties denied I’m such a clown for staying and he didn’t change ofc and they don’t once a cheater always a cheater I’m so sorry that’s happened to your family
He will reap what he sews when y’all are gone
He will definitely cheat on her too
Never jump in quickly ending this marriage. Prepare for you and the children’s future. Make sure he can not leave you high and dry.
And this is why I dnt trust ppl, for me it’s the utter betrayal of the kids! They dnt jst cheat on u but the cheat on the kids too. No thoughts given. Locks b getting changed.
Just quietly leave file for divorce don’t say a word be gone one day when he gets home leave the papers on the counter . It’s a waste of time to confront either of them they knew what they was doing
Now see, I would have already thrown his sh** in the yard && changed the locks! That’s so sad that he had the audacity to do that around your babies. Prayers for you && the kids!! I’m here if you need to vent! Stay strong mama!!! 
Please. For the love of God…move on
Do not try and work it out for “kids sake”
You will be better off on your own. Get proof, file for child support and move tf on
Not right of either of them, especially if she knows he’s married…why confront her? Unless she’s your friend, she owes u nothing, he does. Get with the right person. If it wasn’t her, it would/will/has been someone else.
This topic sucks, I’m so sorry that you’re going through this. I will never understand someone stepping out on their partner. However you decide too approach this situation, be careful. Do you have any sort of plan in place for the changes that are coming? Trusting your gut is always the way to go, I can’t fathom finding something like this out and then when you’ve got the solid proof, you have to be strong. And you will be, you and your children deserve way better than this. You don’t say how long you’ve been married, but I’ve heard from others that it hurts just the same no matter what length of time you’ve been committed. Seek out resources that will be helpful if there is anything you need. I’ve found that personally, I didn’t realize the resources available here in our small community for the elderly. (in my case, it’s becoming care giver to my mama)
The other woman owes you nothing.
She didn’t make a commitment and a family with you, your husband did.
As easy as it is to blame to blame the outside person, it’s not their fault. It’s your husbands for allowing the door to open to others(even just a tiny bit). She could not have come through what wasn’t open.
You don’t have to confront her, who you have a relationship with is him, he is the one who owes you respect and fidelity and if you can’t have that, it’s time to make a decision.
Confront him not her. Good luck and I am so sorry. This affects you and your kids, he needs to face consequences
This man has no respect for you or your children. Your kids must have been so confused 
It’s up to your husband to stay loyal and shut the woman down she ain’t going to care about him having a family if his entertaining her
They are both in the wrong. You confront your husband not her. Hope you transfer those pics to your phone and delete them on his phone. Print them out and see what he says. Tell him you want him out of the house until you figure out how you want to go about this.
Oh this fucking kills me! My 12 year old son was the one to tell me that his father was having an affair with a friend of my family! I was blindsided!
Confronting her is not going help she already knows about you she dosnt care nor does he it’s prob just going to lead to a slinging match just tell him its over and hand over the divorce papers xxx
Get you shit together legally, I hope you have proof of what you got off his phone. Be prepared to financially yourself and your kids till you take his ass to court get him for everything you can not for you but for your kids. Hope you choose not to be a doormat. Keep us updated.
I’m sorry u r going through this, and yes your and your kids lives r about to change. If u can forgive him the great but if u can’t then the choice is yours to make, my advice is to pray about it, ask God not to take this away from u but to give u the strength and endurance for whats to come for u and your kids. This too shall pass. You’ll see.
I don’t think you should confront her. To many things could go wrong. Unless she notices you putting his packed up stuff on her doorstep. Focus on caring for yourself and your children.
What is the point of confronting the other woman now you have 100% proof? Play it smart, get your ducks in a row before leaving him… Don’t turn it into a pointless war with the other woman.
You don’t know what lies he’s telling her. I don’t think confronting her is the best idea, he is the one to confront or just pack up the kids and your stuff when he’s at work and leave.
Make sure you save that proof for court
If you get a chance GET ALL THE PROOF YOU NEED FROM HIS PHONE! Take pics of msgs, call logs, emails, pics, etc! That’s what will help you in the end! Without that it’s just he said she said! Good Luck mama! PS, you’d just be wasting your time on talking with her about it especially since YOU ALREADY KNOW”THE TRUTH” you seen it with your own eyes on his phone, you’re just looking for a vocal confirmation, in which you’re not gonna get! If anything I would force him out of the house, if he leaves first he abandoned the marriage, but if I were you I would be the first to file for divorce! That way he will have to prove that it’s not happening, not you trying to convince them that it is because you’re bringing PROOF firstly!
Trust your gut, it’s usually right. Confront him, she’s not worth it. This will be tough on kids but they will survive.
Sorry this happened to you but keep this within you and your husband it’s his job to put her in her place!
Protect yourself and kids, get a lawyer. Protect money, get child support
Get a GOOD lawyer before anything else.
Whoa. Are u in Abbotsford?
Get a lawyer first do not let him know
Talk to her. You have every right!
Good for you. Stand up for yourself and bring it up with him sooner than later.
I’m so sorry. It’s such a tough thing to be humiliated in front of so many. If you saved proof for the divorce, print some and mail / email it to her, only if you truly feel the need to confront her in some way—Doesn’t have to be face-to-face.
You are very strong. You and your kids will be just fine. Look forward to the next chapter of your life, and focus on never having to worry about him and his intentions, or you and your children feeling that way ever again.
I say don’t say a word sister! Not even to him. Get ur ducks in a row financially, save ur proof (will need it for the lawyer/divorce) get all tax returns proof of income etc. Hire a lawyer, have him served, once he is served give him 24 hours to move all his belongings out of the house r better yet move it for him to her front porch the day he is served. Then go have urself a day of pampering u know hair makeup massage and so on then take u a weekend trip better yet just take a weekend spa getaway (book it with his money before he is served, after all its the least he could do is treat u) when u get back don’t be angry with him and her…LIVE UR LIFE! THEY AINT WORTH IT U DESERVE BETTER. AND THEY WILL GET THE LIFE THEY DESERVE! Sending prayers!
Carful what you do if you go ballistic at the mistress he may lose his job and you won’t get any child support and if he isn’t working then he may go for custody of the kids just something to bear in mind
You do you what you need to do, don’t allow him to hold you down. And explain to the children that daddy is out of control!!! God bless you
The best thing you can do is stay quiet, organize your thoughts, and follow through on your attorney. Use facts and text as artifacts. Be ready and do everything you can to protect your littles. I’m praying for you. There is not anything worse. You can communicate after you get everything you need done 
Sweetie dont confront him or her plan your exit instead since you have proof on your phone …contact a lawyer and file for divorce, if you have a home then they will tell you your options, file for support, alimony, child custody…make sure you clean most of the money out of the account…if you are renting then find another place and pack everything up without him noticing and get a movingvtruck and take EVERYTHING in the house and leave him nothing…that is the ultimate revenge…throw out all his clothes outside and you know what to do…leave him without clothes or anything…he has been having an affair for awhile now and showing it in front of your kids so obviously he doesnt care…time to teach him a lessson…as i always say about cheaters is dog shit stuck to the bottom of your shoe has a higher standing than him he is selfish and self absorbed…good luck and plan well
I wouldn’t say a word. Get your ducks in a row and be done. Good luck! He’ll regret this!
Why confront her? She owes you nothing. Your commitment isn’t with her.
If you are done then file for divorce first thing and start the healing process for yourself. Check with a family lawyer. If you’re in the US, some states are “no fault” states so it really won’t matter what kind of “proof” you have of his cheating. Good luck!
Can I say something from a woman who’s ex husband cheating on for our entire marriage. The biggest thing to remember is the old saying it takes 2 to cheat not just 1. Don’t just confront the other woman but also your husband. It’s a feeling I will never and have never forgotten and my children were young the 1st time and older when he did it again and making a decision to confront 1 and not the other can backfire. Gather your evidence then take your children to a friend’s or family before you confront your husband 1st!! This way your children are not in the house during this time because I didn’t know until my children were adults they heard everything and it did so much damage to them because I didn’t handle it better for them. Calm yourself down best you possibly can then confront him first not her. This is hard and anger is going to be extremely high but be the better person when confronting him because then the effect is he looks like a complete jerk. Then get yourself in to the doctor and tested for STDs just to be completely safe. Once you’ve confronted him then from there depending on how it goes start deciding if you want him out or to stay. This hurts children so much more than we realize and doing this different than I did will help you and your children heal properly. I’m so sorry this happened to you but please remember it takes 2 to cheat not just 1. Also PLEASE make sure you have accounts separated if they are joint accounts before confronting him! And contact a lawyer to make sure you are prepared for anything he decides to do against you In order to keep yourself safe. If you have 2 cars then make sure 1 is only in your name unfortunately if you have a mortgage in both names you are stuck because it’s a loan that can’t be taken out of your name however a lawyer can state he will pay the mortgage including you keeping the home since you have children.
Get a good lawyer freeze his assets
Or walk away you and your children your call
Talk to an attorney BEFORE confronting ANYONE.
Don’t confront anyone- my fave story was a woman who didn’t say a word just one day guy came home and everything was gone, blocked his number, just no closure whatsoever for him- obviously can’t do this with a husband and kids but you get the idea
Sending you love and hugs❤ and may the Lord help you and give you guidance in this matter.
Your kids will thank you for it in due time that U didn’t allow their so called father to consistently disrespect you and your kids by cheating on you all darl xxx they will take a bit of time to adjust but just tell them it’s best for you and daddy not to live together anymore but it does not mean you both dont love the kids, it’s just what needs to be done and what is best for you both to remain in a civil relationship/co-parenting
And if he drops off the radar or faids away in the backdrop, then drop him like a dead beat dad and don’t reach out to him at all and eventually it will sink in( well it should) that he post his kids for C*** and someone else’s left overs ain’t worth it which he will regret but that’s his to deal with and U get a gold star for doing what’s best for you and your kids
Hope she gets preggas and I ain’t his kid and catches clymidia and can’t get it up no more 
karma bus here we come ladies and gents
No need to confront her. He also knew he had a family, that’s for him to respect, not her. He stood before you and God, his mistress did not. She owes you nothing, your husband owes you loyalty, not her. Confrontation won’t take back his infidelity. Did you think this through before you had proof, like if you would stay/leave once you found out? Do you have a plan besides talking to his lady?
Your kids deserve to see their mom happy and being loved correctly. File for custody then file for divorce under the grounds of adultery and take your life back Mama! You deserve better. And better will come eventually but you gotta do this for you and your kids. Men cheating can become dangerous. To your health, your mental health. Hugs!
Shoot don’t confront her she already knows. Just ghost them both… i mean give them no time to explain or the im sorrys cause they aint its been over a year. Parent with him but other wise ghost him.
Your husband should be the first one confronted. He is the one that took vows. You have no idea what hes been telling her.
do yourself a favor let her have him…your marriage wont get better because the trust is broken…honey believe this you will def get over the hurt and you will learn to be happy
No need to confront. Gather the proof is needed and start making an exit plan. The only person here who should have any loyalty to you is the person who made promises. Also go get checked out by the doctor. Personally I’d stop having sex with him so he doesn’t give you something that can harm your health. And get into therapy.
Go see a lawyer. Don’t confront her - it will be your fault
Whether or not she knows about you and his family, it’s YOUR HUSBAND who owes YOU his vows.
He’s broken the marriage, not her.
You need to confront HIM.
HE stepped out on YOUR marriage.
Get rid of him as soon as you can…and DO NOT confront the woman! You said she knows about his family…does she care? Obviously not. Don’t lower yourself by confronting her. Instead, be glad that you found out who and what your husband really is and don’t waste any more time with him. You will be so much better off without him.
So, gather all your proof/ evidence and go to the court house and file for divorce. Get your children in some therapy to help them deal with their emotions, and you join too, Mom.
kick him to the curb
Please do not confront right now…don’t show your hand, consult with an attorney, get your ducks in a row, make your plans, protect yourself and your children
Get rid wont say wot id do on this ill b barred
Screenshot the proof and send it to yourself . Save it.
main point vice versa.
I wouldn’t worry about confronting her. Although it is shitty of her to br messing with a married man the only one who owes you loyalty is your husband. I would just be working on planning your exit but you never mentioned leaving him.
Come straight out and tell him. Don’t ask because a cheater and narcissist always deny it. Tell him that you know … In the meantime he is pretty arrogant and ignorant for holding hands with another woman in front of your children. I guess he was expecting them to tell you so he would be off the hook
Go see a lawyer first and start the paper work. The applicant always has the upper hand in court. Have your papers in hand when you confront him so you don’t change your mind when he starts the mind games/ apologizes. You’ve given him the chance in the past already by confronting him about her. You need to see a therapist to help get through the next few stages of grief, trust me it will help. You will learn to set a boundary and be able to keep saying no. He might guilt trip you, use the kids etc so your mind needs to be strong. Don’t look back just keep pushing forward. Always trust your gut instincts going forward.
How can some women with a clear conscience go with a man who has a family ,that’s just scandalous
OMG 
hope your ok x think of yourself now and do what you need to do even if it is confronting the other woman x let her see the devastation it has caused cause your husband is going to feel it from you too lol x x hope you and the kids will be happy 
Find a new home or have him gone if you can afford to take care of urself. Confronting her won’t help and really it’s them both. Just be glad u can now have a better life without this 
. Go make the best for u and ur kids. They deserve it and so do u.
Your husband should have thought about his whole family… he’s who you deal with.
You could approach her but what would it do. Once I invited someone to my kids bday party that didn’t drive so my mate picked her up and then he sure took her home she laughted as she explained I needed the pick up I wouldn’t give her the satisfaction if you weren’t there how do you what the truth is and why would you belive anything that comes your way after that one. I’d be done walk away
Take your proof to an attorney or the court house and file for divorce,alimony the whole nine yards
Confronting her will further humiliate you, not worth it. Just leave sis
Seems like a lot of women couldn’t care less if he is married and has children.
Save all your proof and ditch the loser.
Lawyer, kick him to the curb. You deserve better than his cheating ass
I’m so incredibly sorry. I’ve been in a similar situation and I know how much it hurts. Take screenshots of your proof and keep it. I’m not sure if your marriage is repairable at this point but I highly encourage therapy for yourself to work through what you’re experiencing. You didn’t deserve this and neither do your kids.
If you’re able to, access his phone again and take pictures with your phone of the conversations they’ve been having so you have proof of the infidelity. Bring them to an attorney and have divorce papers drafted up. DO NOT CONFRONT EITHER OF THEM ABOUT IT. Once papers are drawn up, request that a process server be the ones to deliver them to your husband. If your kids are already telling you “I saw daddy holding hands with so and so”, chances are they probably have seen more than that. BUT, don’t try and ask your kids more questions about it because that puts them into an uncomfortable situation where they might feel either A- they’ll get in trouble or B- they don’t want to get their dad in trouble. Going to confront her yourself will just add more drama to the situation and may even result in a physical fight if things get too heated and you getting in trouble. If that happens, your husband can say you’re “unstable” and try and work that into getting custody of the kids. Best course of action would be to take your evidence and do everything behind the scenes.
Make him pay pay pay!!! Smile all the way to the bank! Drop his stinky laundry at her door!
His loss,When you’re out of his life for good,He will realize he messed up…Too late buddy
Dump him and take everything. Don’t waste your breath on this tramp.
Confronting her will bring you nothing but more grief. Please don’t. You won’t get the closure or respect you deserve. And could possibly get in legal trouble. It’s not worth it at all.
Your marriage is over. This affair has been ongoing. Get your things in order to best benefit you and the children. It’s now time to prioritize you and them.
Start putting money in your own account. Document everything! Take it to attorney!
Do what Jessi Larkins said above. Sorry hun, that sucks
Deal with him. She’s not your priority.
Think about what you want out of the situation now.
It sounds like you’ve been preparing for this and it sounds like your kids are fairly young. It will be an adjustment, but kids are resilient. You’ll all be okay.
If possible, make sure that you either print screenshots as proof of his infidelity or get a lawyer for the divorce and subpoena the girlfriend to testify to the infidelity. Typically I would say keep your divorce civil, but in cases like this… take him to the cleaners. Request custody, alimony and child support. He did this to your family, not you. I don’t think you should confront her because if she knows she’s been seeing/sleeping with a married man with a family, she’s straight trash and you confronting her isn’t going to get you anywhere. Just remind yourself of two things-
The ones saying why take it up w her?? WTF happened to being a decent human being?! You don’t sleep w knowingly married guys. Confront them both if that’s what you feel like doing. Too many times the ‘other woman’ is given a pass bcuz she owes you nothing. No to hell w all that. They both owe other humans decency n respect. Don’t listen to these weak ass ppl. If you want to confront her, do it. I would. How dare her and him equally and in front of your kids!
Talking to her honestly won’t give you the closure you’re looking for sadly if she knows about the whole family it’s likley that she’s gonna deny it to you even with the proof just like he has done and it’ll hurt you even more!
She is not the problem, he is. No point in confronting her. Confront him. He is the one doing this to you, this other woman doesn’t owe you anything
Your issue is with your husband. He DEFINITELY knows he has a family. HE cheated on you. She is no pillar of society. He doesn’t have to admit it. (They all deny) Make your move. Sorry you’re dealing with this. I have been there…keep your convos with hubs. I’d suggest making him leave or you plan your departure. Leave her nasty, ass out of it.
I wouldn’t confront her as clearly she has no respect for herself, you or your family. I’d take photos of the proof you have, file for divorce and get ready to move on with your life.
Sorry this happened to me after 14 yrs of marriage- and I was thrown on the street with my kid and nothing else. Like one lady said get a lawyer.
Confront her? Where is his responsibility in this? Didn’t he also know he was married with a family? He allowed it to happen, he’s in the wrong also, get rid of him.
Don’t confront. Save it all for court and then nail his ass to the wall legally.
sorry about this, But why are you going to confront this woman,??? Yes she was wrong, but this is still on your husband, if he was faithful, he wouldn’t have done anything, So don’t blame her, I never did with any of the woman my ex husband went out with, That was all on him!! Yes the women should never slept with him, but again, he was 100% to blame. If they went after him, all he had to say is "i love my wife & I never want to hurt her by doing anything’. But a cheater doesn’t say this, so they are to blame
Put him out don’t move your children he should still have to pay mortgage
He is the one that made the vow with you “til death do us part” not her. Why would you even confront her at all? Like what do you expect to gain from that realistically? And what does it matter if he continues to deny it? You have your proof whether he admits to it or not. Forward everything to your phone and head for the divorce lawyer 
I know you want to confront someone, but save it for your own sake. Write down what you want to say to them if you feel you must, but don’t give it to them. They weren’t sorry before they got caught. Just remember that. Get a good lawyer, and don’t look back. This happened to me too, and it felt like my whole world was coming apart, but 4 years post divorce, I’ve come to realize that I am so much better off alone than being stuck in a marriage with someone I couldn’t trust.
Get a lawyer and file whatever before you say anything to him.
ALWAYS TRUST YOUR GUT! this woman is a trifling Hoe