So I guess this is more like a vent post. I had a gut feeling for a while now, probably over a year, my husband was seeing someone else. He’s very sneaky. It’s a woman from his coed team. My kids have met her and have said some things that have not sit right with me like…. “ mommy I saw daddy holding hands with so and so”. I don’t want to go too much into detail. I never had concrete proof. But the other day my daughter asked me to put Netflix on my husbands phone. I never knew his password but I put in a combination of numbers and it worked. Let’s just say I have my proof now. I’ve confronted him about this woman in the past but he denied it. So I think now I’m just going to confront her. The woman knows this man has a whole ass family. I feel terrible for my kids bc their life is about to change. I’m okay though, I think. I’ve accepted my gut feeling a long time ago! Thanks for reading. Sorry if this is all over the place.
Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. I feel like my husband has been seeing someone behind my back
So sorry!! Whatever he says don’t take him back after you end it! Stay strong!
If you’re planning on leaving him then I wouldn’t confront her (yet). You’ve got your proof… If it were me I’d just go ahead and sneak away at some point and file for divorce. Confronting her would tip him off that he knows you know.
Trust the gut, let her have him.
Leave him asap! Kids and wife first and she knows you have a family…she needs to find a single man period!
So sorry 
prayers and strength your way
Why confront her? Did you marry her? Did she say wedding vows to you? Does your husband know that he has a whole family? Confront your husband! You got the proof. Or get your ducks in a row and them confront him. What exactly is the aim of confronting her? Seems like you think your husband is blameless in this affair.
You should have taken pictures of your proof from your phone.
Now that you have made a decision, don’t back down. Don’t let him Buffalo you. Take the kids and go. Get custody and support. Let him have his floosie. You go heal up and have time with your kids. Someday someone will come along for you.
Strength to you:heart: You got this! You already know what you gotta do. BE STRONG 
“A man says he loves both women equally. He had loved woman A first, then fell for woman B.
But if he truly loved woman A. He wouldn’t of ever fell for woman B.”
A wise woman once told me that. Leave and don’t ever look back. If he even had an ounce of respect or care for you. He wouldn’t of looked in that woman’s direction. He would’ve split with you and THEN did his own thing
Let her have him. Once a cheater always a cheater. Don’t let them know that you know.
Send the evidence to your phone so you have proof in the divorce. As this will help your case when it comes to settling things.
. Freeze joint accounts
. Speak to a lawyer
. Take him for everything he has.
Document all your proof for court. Don’t confront her. Just go file for custody of kids and divorce. Let her have him. He’ll end up cheating on her too.
Please consider marriage counseling😔
I’m so sorry 
He will do the same thing to her eventually she will lose him how she got him. You deserve a faithful man sorry you’re going through this.
Let him come home to new locks on the doors and his shit on the front lawn. Get your stuff in order and all the proof you need.
Don’t say a word. Get your bag quietly, take your evidence, and get your ducks in a row. Once that’s done, say cya!
I’m sorry this is gut-wrenching
I’m so sorry. What a horrible thing. Nobody has even asked, do you want to work on your marriage? Does he? Is he regretful? Would you consider marriage counseling?
I know the hurt side of you wants to blame her and to have him ultimately choose you but that is just ego. Don’t let your hurt guide you in this. Get a therapist immediately and play your cards right now. I didn’t and lost everything, including my child. Don’t be the woman they continually ask “Then why didn’t you leave??” what you do now will determine a life of post divorce hell or eventually being able to feel vindicated and happy.
Don’t even bother confronting the women .it was your husband’s job to uphold the respect and dignity of his wife and kids as a married man and have his priorities straight with regards to his family.
You have your proof.u basically dealing with a man who lies and cheats and uses his free time to be with another women instead of his wife and kids. Plz think wisely about how you go forward
Shes not worth it but if telling her how much of a disgust she is makes you feel better than go for it girl. I would file for divorce first and dont tell them focus on you and kids and hey have some fun in the meantime. Get your proof for the courts though it will help your case and yes if possible keep some cash for yourself and then freeze the joint accounts whilst you do that. Dont waste or settle anymore than you have on this loser. He clearly has no respect for you or your family and she is just a home wrecking whore who cant cut it as a real woman. Honey your too good for that.
Sending prayers:pray: 
. I grew up in home like this, when I was younger, and during my teenage and adolescent years. I don’t know how old the children are, but please it’s NOT a healthy environment for you, nor them. Even as younger children it does impact their lives, and well being. I wish you the best momma, safe prayers.
This is one of the most painful things a person could ever do to you. I do not have any advice to offer, except that I feel for you and I am so sorry that you are going through this.
Why confront her? He’s the one that is or was in a relationship with you. You either really accept the fact and file for divorce or forgive him and go to marriage counseling.
Leave him with your kids divorce him and file for spouse and child support. Make a plan don’t tell anyone maybe stay with family or a trusting friend.
He knew he had a whole family 
tf.
You’ve known. And you’ve allowed it. What you allow is what will continue.
Please find your self worth so your babies can see a healthy relationship.
I know the feeling I had this happened to me and my three kids at the time I was a week off having my son and then two weeks after my son was born it all happened again which my son was really sick and in hospital dying but now he’s a happy healthy 18 month old and he’s done it again but this time got her pregnant
What a piece of shit he is to have an affair let alone in front of your kids.
Confronting her won’t do anything, she already knows about you and don’t care, she won’t care any more now.
Move on and let them have each other.
Confront her for what? He is the one married to you. He has a whole family with you not her.
Just leave him. You already know. It’s not worth your precious time dealing with that drama. I’m sorry honey.
I’m in the exact situation as you only don’t have my proof yet. Yes mine, is exceptionally sneaky. And kind of has the upper hand on me as I have no income. We have a disabled son who requires care around the clock. Divorce him. I would start with asking him to move out. Since he can’t behave like a husband let’s see if he can behave like a man at least. He chose to stray, it is him that needs to leave.
Confront her for what? Your battle is with your cheating husband and no one else.
Prayers for strength!
Always go with your gut feelings! 
Your confrontation is with him. Not her.
It sucks when another woman’s name is your significant others pincode.
Praying for you and your family 
I’m sorry, I know this is hard and know you want someone to be held responsible but he is the one that made a vow to you and a commitment to your family. You have no way of knowing what he has been telling her and to put the blame on her and get in her face about it is misplaced anger. This is all on him. Run away and don’t look back.
Nah, take the proof to a divorce lawyer and call it a day.
She didn’t break your marriage vows.
He did.
I would say NOTHING and just pack up my kids and go… U nor ur kids deserve this or their sorry ass excuse babe! Let them be cheaters… Nothing she or him say is gonna make anything matter.
I’m so sorry. Stay strong and do what YOU need to be happy. All the rest will fall in line.
Heads would be coming off if I went and confronted the woman 
I would confront her as well I’m sure she knows he has a whole ass family. But focus on your kids and your husband first but make it known you know she was involved
Screenshot everything, pack your documents up, sort your money so its separate seek a divorce lawyer and follow their advice hand him the papers and say dont let the door hit ya on your way out!
Confront him not her his the one who broke the vows .
No matter who you confront won’t change a thing…The heck with marraige counseling…Don’t stay with a person that does not respect you or your kids…if your kids are seeing this…it shows he does not care about their feelings. Continuing to be with him teaches them what amount of disrespect to allow from their partner…Know your value and ask for a divorce…Why should you go stay with famiy?..Make his sorry*** leave
I don’t understand the part about Netflix and the password giving you proof? Did you read texts while on his phone or basing it on the movies watched on Netflix? Just curious on that part…
Confront her!! Get your satisfaction of saying what you need/want to them both!!
No need to talk to her she doesn’t owe you anything. She’s probably going to say or do something to hurt you more . You always go after him never her
What is the reason for confronting the woman for? Do you want to tell her off so it gives you a sense of closure ? Other than that, I see no point in doing so.
Darling, your post had me in my feels,needless to say I am confidently going through divorice proceedings as of now… sending positive vibes, you got this
I’m so sorry you have to go through this. I hope you get through this mess.
I am so very sorry!
One thing I would say is don’t leave the home. If you move out (even w/ the kids), it could be considered abandonment and he could get the home.
I would get proof (take pics of whatever evidence you found - pics of text or pics) and set a new email account and send it to yourself from your phone. Call around for a very good lawyer (I believe, whoever you call and inquire w/ will NOT be able to be hired by him…even if you just inquired, and never hire the lawyer, he won’t be able to hire them.) and ask them what you should do.
Lastly, IF you are willing to work through things, marriage counseling - and God - can do some mighty things…but only if there is repentance. Hard to say…it’s been over a year you say…that is really hurtful and I don’t think anyone would expect you to stay.
Don’t make rash decisions out of emotions/anger/hurt, etc…try to stay calm and seek out legal counsel.
Again…I am so sorry. 
The other woman has no commitment to you. The infidelity is your husband’s. Hold him responsible.
If I was you…the only thing I would say to her was…he’s all yours…thank you for taking my trash out!! And dump his dirty laundry on her porch!!
Umm all the proof you needed was when your daughter said “I saw daddy holding hands!” Right there and then you should’ve contacted a PI. Btw you can confront her if you feel you need to but remember your spouse owes you loyalty not the other woman.
This has nothing to do with her. It’s between you and your husband. It always makes me laugh when a husband cheats and they’re angry with the woman.
Seeing the many women saying why would you confront her it wasn’t her fault she is not to blame but yes she is to blame as much as him in this situation she knew full well he was married and had a family she should have left this man well alone or even better still she should have spoke up and told his wife what he was at!!!
I’m so sorry this happened but I don’t think u need to confront her just how she knew he has a family HE knew he has a family……He owes you all the honesty and loyalty….She owes you nothing….I don’t ever deal with the woman if that’s my man it’s my hands he getting….Cause it’s him and I in this not me and her……That’s just my thoughts…I wish you nothing but the best for you and your kids🙏
What ? Why confront her ? She’s nothing to do with you, she’s not in a relationship with you , he is the only one that’s you should be pissed at
Go about into his phone screen shot everything so you have proof in court because you can win everything even spousal support since he stepped outside the marriage. Like look in pictures , messages and etc. An make sure you erased everything you sent yourself. honestly i wouldn’t confront him I’d take him straight to court for doing adultery plus make him pay for court cost and therapy for the children. Plus getting their word on video or recording will help 
Confront your cheating husband…and then pack his bags 
and send him to her…he can then confront her…
Just wondering how it felt to be cheated on…Do u get jealous to the other women ….or u stalk her???
If it’s any consolation, the woman my husband cheated with, married & caught her husband going on a “BUSINESS TRIP” with his girlfriend. She knew the actions because she did the same thing. Turn around is fair play. Sorry you have too go thru this, but all men or women do not cheat.
I would leave her out of it. The only person that owes you anything is him. Don’t exhaust energy on her.
Why would you confront her? Your husband is the one that’s not being faithful to you.
He’s the issue not the other woman , he’s opened the door & let her in , confront him again with your proof
They are both to blame. He deserves to be confronted and kicked out. She deserves to be confronted and blasted.
All these women saying “why confront her” “she ain’t in the relationship” but obviously the girl must think she is if she KNOWS he has a WHOLE FAMILY, a woman at home, and she’s still tryna play wifey. Especially around the kids.
They are BOTH so wrong on that part. You deserve better queen and so do your kiddos! 
It’s so sad when kids are involved especially when they are witnessing it. That’s something that will follow them their whole life. I know leaving him will change their life but once they are older and piece everything together they will understand why. I’d confront her if he’s not being 100% honest with you.
Happened to me, lets just say karmas a bitch! What comes around goes around!
Don’t make a fool of yourself.!!! Why would you consult her? He is the one. If it isn’t her it will just be another woman. GO TO THE SOURCE “HIM”
The way I read the letter is that she just wants to confront the other woman to get the truth. Her husband keeps denying it so maybe she just wants to absolutely make sure. Personally I would need verification before I made the huge step of divorce, especially with children involved
Why confront her ? She owns you NOTHING, not respect, not loyalty , not commitment NOTHING, he is the one to blame because he is the one who married you .
Do whatever you feel you have to do but do not get your kids involve on that mess . He still their dad and nothing will change that .
And remember, if he cheated on you once he will do it again, and you will be the one to blame for giving him the opportunity to cheat again .
You deserve better, if he wasn’t happy he should of left , not started an affair and lied to you. Once you trust is broken it’s irreparable. It will be hard at first but you’ll find the strength to get through this. Get yourself and the children some counselling to help get through the early stages . 
She doesn’t owe you anything it sucks yeah but she’s not the one you should be directing your anger at
Pack his bag and tell him she’s all yrs !! Men seem to want their cake and eat it to !! I would confront her to get closure and if she has a man I’d tell him too !!
You and yr children deserve better then this paristite that wants the best of both world !! Kick his butt to the curb !!
Hang on to your self pride. She’s not worth your time. She isn’t the one who should have been loyal to you, that job is your husbands. I hope you saved your proof and you stand firm. I’m so sorry you and your kids are going through this.
Don’t confront her. Confront him.
Confronting her won’t do anything. She isn’t doing wrong. Your husband was shopping/dating looking for a possible next. Confront him. But he’ll likely lie. Your options are to deal with it or plan your exit.
I’d confront both of them. Lying pigs.
Put him out with the trash. She owes you nothing.
Take a DEEP breath.
Go for a long solo drive with the music blasting, windows down, scream- cry- sing- laugh- and scream some more.
DO NOT confront her or him. Start going through your belongings, gather all important documents you’ll need and store them at a trusted persons house. Have a yard sale, minimize all belongings for you and the kids. Get yourself an attorney and start making that plan to your NEW life and once there work on yourself, date yourself- self care is so important- know your worth and never ever allow a man to disrespect you again.
By you doing this quietly without any confrontation and little to no emotions, it will ONLY have him and even her wonder WHY you “don’t care” and can walk away just like that. She’ll be left questioning how his wife was able to leave him like easy peasy and he will realize he isn’t worthy of being a heartbreaker. He’ll be in total shock that you are divorcing him without any arguments or wasted breath on him and his skanky hoe.
If I were you I would just simply tell her that I know what’s up and that she can have him.
Kick him out of the house, get a divorce, not something your little ones need to deal with. Feel very bad for you all.
She doesn’t owe you shit. She is not the one that made marital vows. Your husband is the piece of shit. Don’t blame her.
been there. she doesn’t owe you anything. you have a husband problem.
She didn’t cheat on you
She has no moral obligation to you. Your husband is the cheater. It’s him you need to deal with. Do you think confronting her will stop him cheating. He has no respect for you or your marriage. That’s what you need to adress
WOW He really has some nerve to take your kids with him to meet her! Pack his bags and send him her way-copy your proof and file for divorce!
Kids don’t lie…my only concern is why he’s bringing another women around them and doing that that will effect them since they know you guys are together. I don’t think they can grow up knowing what a healthy relationship is if their dad is seeing other people behind your back and letting them see right?
Your husband is the cad but to be honest she is low thing aswell
Okay he decided to move on you move on too if you need proof get it I understand your upset but remember this once you open the can of worms then there is no going back confrontation is bad talking is better just follow him next time if you want proof that’s not hard momma your a queen don’t you forget that you do whatever you want to bring you peace it’s hard it hurts but you will get through this
The gut never lies!
I’d tell her she can have him and give yourself the self love you deserve and walk away x
I’d confront him…along with his suitcases full of his belongings. To do stuff with her around his kids is beyond low…you deserve better. X
I been there… it’s not a easy road for sure but you will get through it… praying for you!
No need to apologize when you didn’t do anything wrong.
To be honest neither of them are going to admit it are they so the quest for truth is pretty fruitless unless they are caught red handed.But you have all the proof you need from what your children have said ditch him he doesn’t deserve you or the children conducting his extra marital in front of them, good luck with whatever you decide.
I would see about suing her for breaking up my family you can do this its called something but I can’t remember what
It’s one thing having an affair but to take your kids along while your having an affair is a new level, dump this man and leave him with nothing
its never fair on the kids , but you are right to confront this other woman , your husband , probably initiated it all , you cannot carry on living a lie , so best to get it all out , and move on , no matter how painful it may feel now , the future will heal that pain and you will have few regrets , you and your kids deserve an honest and open father . He is failing yours and their happiness . Try to be fair with the kids and him as bittterness will effect their lives forever . acrimony now will leave deep scars , talk rather than shout , and if there is no reasoning , remain the calm person . be the rock your kids can trust . Your husband will be the one who has to deal with his infidelity and trust me karma does bite .