Let him go! If he is such a great man he deserves someone to love him, let him go find the love he deserves
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Who gets the kids? Are you willing to leave and start over again. Do you go to church. God is a good fixer of messed up lives. Give Him a try 
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If I was said husband, what u have shared with us, u should share with him, before making ur mind up, let him know this is how you feel and see if his effort to win/keep ur heart with him is strong enough to keep your relationship with because if he is that awesome im sure he would make u feel differently if he knew this was upsetting you.
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The longer you wait and hold in your true feelings the more bitter, cold and angry you will become. There is a huge difference between love and being in love⌠You need to sit down and have a deep discussion with him. You mentioned youâre already getting cold⌠Talk with him about it and a solution⌠There are optionsâŚ
Things I donât agree with but if it helps you then⌠Open marriage⌠Separation. Divorce.
Have you ever seen a movie called War of the Roses? They stay married, sleep separately, and have boundaries through the house with scheduled times in the common living spaces⌠Oh wait I think theyâre divorced but still living together⌠Anyway another option⌠You need to evaluate your true feelings for him⌠Donât play with his heart, itâs not fair to you or to himâŚ
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Literally every relationship is gonna be like this after a while. Itâs not always gonna be an âall consumingâ love.
You said your self his âissueâ is fixed. Why not try date nights and going out or planning small trips together instead of therapy. Maybe go into an adult store and look at things together pick something out to try. Sex isnât the most important thing but you seem focused on it. So try to fix that portion of the relationship since everything else is ok. If it doesnât work out then file the divorce.
That man deserves someone who will try. And it sounds like you just want -something new or lustful- cause youâre bored, that will only last for so long and will be missing him soon after.
You want that âmovie/hallmarkâ type love, and thatâs not how it ever actually is.
Donât listen to all the tripe. The party line.
You are under NO obligation to stay married to someone you donât love passionately.
You deserve to find what you want.
It will not be easy, nothing worth doing is ever easy.
Go! Be happy. Find yourself outside this misery. Donât worry about the word âmarriageâ. Life is short. You deserve to be happy.
You canât force yourself to feel anything, despite all the well intended advice here.
You know what you NEED and what you WANT to do. You knew before you wrote this. If you need permission, here it is girl.
You have permission to go be happy and find what you desire. You have permission to be selfish. You have permission to love and be loved. You have permission to go live life full and passionately!!
Good luck!!
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You need to be communicating with him. It sounds like youâre hiding all these feelings and expecting him to read your mind. If he truly loves you then he can work with you on fixing your relationship. But I would give it a good try before you call it quits, but youâre happiness is important to your children too.
I feel like I am listening to myself 9 years ago⌠The situation details are a little different, but that desire for passion/etc vs. staying with a good man is dead on.
Here is my short version of consequences and wisdom.
My divorce was horrible. It took two years and I have PTSD from it. My leaving squashed everything that was good and kind in him. The divorce fucked up my kids as well. They were 8 and 13. I used to always tell people never stay together for the kids, I know I only say that if there is abuse going on. My actions hurt 3 wonderful amazing humans. The PTSD I got from it is just karma for my actions. I moved in with a man who hit every mark for what I thought I was missing. He was the opposite of my ex husband in every way. I spent 5yrs living in a hell that I guess I deserved, but my kids didnt. The next three year relationship wasnât so great either.
What I have learned:
Adult saying the grass ainât greener on the other side is more than true.
Regrets???
Right now I would sell my soul to Satanâs boss if I could go back in time knowing what I know now.
If I could only do it over again I wouldnât leave. I would rather live with a good, honest, hard working man who dotes on me, who makes sure I have every comfort I desire. Who truly loves me and our children. I would find myself a ultra discreet side piece to see once or twice a month to meet those other needs, but to be honest⌠Fuck the sex and fuck the passion. It is not worth the damage caused. I do not even remember what it feels like to be actually loved. I dont remember what joy feels like. SMH. My karma has been harsh. I deserve it.
I had a damn good man and threw it away over some sexual needs. Fuckin idiot I was.
I would give anything I have my old life back. Would I be unhappy? No. Would I be loved? Yes
Would I be content? Yes
Would I be in love? No
Would I have security? Yes
Would my kids be ok? Hell yes.
SMH
9 years ago I fucked up. Iâm a fucking idiot. I wish I could at least go back in time and kick my ass for being so stupid.
More than anything in this world, I wish I could feel the love I once felt. In nine years I have learned that to be loved is more important than what I thought I needed.
I wish you all the best and if you leave, I hope you do not end up miserable and bitter like me 
You are living in a dream world if you think marriage is supposed to be all flowers and lovey divey. It doesnât work that way. There are arguments, stresses, money problems. Divorce is easy way out. Most couples have hard times. Times where escape is answer. Most long married people will tell you that theyâve thought of escaping thru divorce but stuck it out. And they grew into the love they wanted. If you walk away from this, you will walk every time. There are rewards.
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Speaking from someone who has been with my husband for almost 20 years and a seriously volatile marriage before him I got lucky but I will say that you have to wake up every day and make that conscious decision to love that person today no matter what is thrown at you 2 marriage is hard especially when you throw kids in the mix there will be days that you will struggle to like one another let alone love them but you made that choice to love them so with that you need to start dating again and doing things together alone and you need to make a weekend trip and go off together no kids and you need to focus on you 2 and you need to remember why you married this man and figure out where you list interest at you say he is obsessed with you maybe itâs not obsession and itâs truly just his love for you it sounds like you have hit that 7 year itch and youâre thinking is there life out there so much you havenât done and seen well like others said my sister in law thought same way after 27 years of marriage her high-school sweetheart but she was lucky because her husband set back and let her go wild until she seen him at a bar with another girl from work it was only a friendâs thing guarantee and she realized she did love him and she couldnât handle seeing him with someone else so needless to say she came back home not all men are going to sit back like that you need to put more energy into fixing what is wrong with you and repairing your marriage because if not I have a feeling your setting yourself up for a big ket down
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You fell out of love with him because of a lack of physically relationship. Now you say you donât love him. I think you never did. Leave and find someone you actually love and also get him to a shrink. He is a cutter. Donât leave yiur kids with someone like that
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Love is a choice, not a feeling. If you have a good man, and it sounds like you do, put in the work!! The grass isnât greener on thr other side, it is greener where you CHOOSE to water it! âA love that consumes meâ? Be prepared to have a string of failed marriagesâŚ
National Geographic published a study once that stuck with me stating that the in love FEELING doesnât last more than a set amount of time, there are numerous other studies proving the same. Her is one such article.
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You seem to be wanting that rush of fresh love. That only lasts for awhile then itâs a calm serene love that lingers. think about that cause Iâm afraid that you will be very sorry if you leave
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He is also being selfish pulling a guilt trip stunt like that. I was in a similar position. Itâs time to get out for the sake of yourself and your kids. Manipulation on that level is toxic. You need tell him how you feel and get on with your life.
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Never stay unhappy. Life is too short.
That being said love evolves over time. Itâs not always the rip your clothes off burning passion every single minute.
Love is about growing together. Falling apart and falling back together.
Youâre gonna do what you will decide at the end of the day. But just remember, the grass is always greener. Make sure that you have no doubts before you go anywhere.
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Watch the TYLER PERRY movie âTemptations ⌠Confessions of a Marriage Counselorâ and you would be the wife in the movie. I would say the grass isnât greener on the other side.
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As someone who has been with her spouse for 7 years and still has passion and deep love going on both sides, I feel everyone deserves to have real, true love.
My ex was abusive, and I had 2 kids with him.
If you stay somewhere youâre unhappy, resentment WILL build.
And even if you think you hide it, kids will ALWAYS pick up on animosity between their parents.
Kids are much better off with 2 HAPPY parents, together or not.
It is possible to to co-parent amicably. Might be a rough start, but if you wait until the kids are teenagers, they will DEFINITELY know youâre unhappy and could begin to resent you for keeping them in an uncomfortable, eggshell environmentâŚ
You decide if you want to make it work! Maybe you have a bedroom issue? After 3 kids anyone would. Maybe talk to your doctor or see a therapist maybe together. 9 years is a lot to throw away when you say heâs such a great guy!
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Honestly this is the ONE post that sounds like itâs worth saving. I would tell him how you feel and explain that yâall need to go to therapy. I can already tell you heâs gonna be willing to and he will understand. But itâs you. You need to be willing to actually try. Actually get over the past. Iâm one of those people who need sex as well. My current partner doesnât wanna have sex, ever. So itâs a big deal and I know where your coming from. I really hope you can try that. And if that doesnât work then let him find someone who will love him. Although, I feel if you leave he will no longer be such a great man towards women, or even your kids. He will not treat another woman the same way he treats you. He will be bitter and hurt excruciatingly⌠So just talk to him before anything.
You do know they sell adult toysâŚMaybe if your so bored with such a great guy âŚGo take a shower and fk yourself
Let him go so he can find a woman who deserves such a wonderful man
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Crazy⌠I donât know how you say you donât love him. Thereâs always love left if you every truly loved a person it never just goes away completely. It can be clouded with grudges being held. Maybe you need to forgive the guy. I mean if he was embarrassed and expressed that you should of been more understanding. Bought a vibrator and had him use it on you or something. You gave up on him and then he tried to make it right. Maybe you should try to make it right and forgive him. Use your words and communicate with him that you were hurt by that and need the passion. You might leave this marriage and end up in something a whole lot worse. Usually men who make you feel what you want are manipulative, controlling and even abusive. Your husband sounds better than a shiny new flame that will no doubtfully end in a huge fire and burn out.
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I really think you should tell him this, exact word for word, a lot of relationships donât work because people canât communicate⌠your feelings are valid but he should know how you feelâŚ
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Yâall, she literally said they got together when they were 18 and 20.
Kids also complicate things if you grow apart.
Just because someone is âgreatâ in certain ways doesnât mean theyâre great FOR everyone, especially if the someone theyâre with just feels like theyâre going through the motionsâŚ
They both deserve their own love stories.
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Iâll take him 
( kidding ) he sounds like a great guy.
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He sounds pretty awesome. I think you may need to find that spark. If you leave, you might end up in a worse situation
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What if it was u that had a problem in the bedroom and couldnât help.u didnât get help at first but when u did ur partner had lost interest.u have to work at marriage. Those feelings of romance and lust will fade. Ifu jump into another realtionship the same thing will happen. Those feelings will fade . This is a problem In most long term marriages. U have to work at it. Go away without the kids . Ice dealt w the same issues in my life Iâm telling u a trip away just u two will help things. U need to communicate w him tell him how ur feeling . Sounds to me like if u donât fix it one of yâall or both is going to end up having an affair. That will make things bad when it comes to custody. How would u feel if u seen him w another women? Think ab that bc the door swings both ways babe. Of all else fails try a trail seperation. How do u think he feels knowing as a man he canât satisfy u bc of health reasons he canât help. If it was the other way and u couldnât have sex and he said the same thing u did ab him , ppl would be doging him. Go to the sex store together spice it up.
Get off Facebook and tell him that. Thatâs what you should do. 
He doesnât deserve to be in the dark, especially if he senses no issues, so that you can come ask Facebook first.
Talk to your person, weâre not your therapist. 
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And this is a short summary of whatâs wrong with an entire generation⌠the whole âme, me, meâ and âmore, more, moreâ mindsetâŚ
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Everyone who says⌠dont be selfish has no idea what shes talking about.
I promise you he wonât stop at cutting himself and thatâs not your problem he needs help you canât give him. You have 2 choices Stay and deal or Go and live!! And you make sure that YOU make that choice for yourself!!
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Personally I wouldnât stay in a relationship out of guilt or obligation. Itâs not fair to you or him if you donât love him⌠It sucks but it is what it is.
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Would you consider discussing with him an open marriage?
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Yâall are saying sheâs selfish but I guarantee most of you have left relationships because you were simply unhappy with it. Or been left because they were simply unhappy with it. If happiness is selfish then so be it. Because it is OUR lives and OUR choice. So quick to judge everyone on here. And many of you read over the fact that she said he cut himself when she left before. God only knows what they actually go through on a day to day basis. Itâs about the children. If theyâre both unhappy then the children will see, feel, and live in that. Because if she isnât in love with him, chances are sheâs not dishing the love out to him. So why should they both stay together when they could just be single and co-parent or find partners that better suit them.
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You truly donât appreciate what you have your sex life is more important than your children and the peace in your life
This breaks my heart for this man. This is selfishness on steroids. You would sacrifice the happiness of your children for this? This is about YOU! YOU need to fix this. Thatâs todayâs society, though. Shameful.
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I know you say you have triedâŚbut if he is a great guy and your relationship is peaceful togetherâŚyou are throwing away gold. Maybe buy lingerie and toysâŚwatch porn togetherâŚgo on more date nights to rekindle the spark. Travel with him more. Take a trip just the two of you. Roleplay as strangers and buy sexy outfits for it. Keep trying. It is worth investing into a great relationship. HeckâŚmaybe even talk about finding another couple and swinging with them. Anything and everything. Kids dont deserve a stable family being broken up. Then issues arise and they act out as teenagers. Most teen moms come from divorced families bc one allows too much freedom out of guilt over the other parent being more stern. Talking about divorcing to young kidsâŚnot a good idea. They want that stability and will resent you if you tell them you are planning on breaking up their family. You have to think about everyone,not just yourself, when kids are involved. OtherwiseâŚwill end up divorced with dad having full custody while you are out chasing a pipe dream and may never find what you are looking for. Just dont think about yourselfâŚthink about everyone involved and how it will affect their lives also.
Do you know how marriages last a life time?
YOU WORK IT OUT!!!
I was in your shoesâŚ
married young, had kids young.
My husband was great, we never really yelled at each other, got along for the most part., ⌠I fell out of love and moved onâŚweâve even tried to get back together after 20yrs., we both had just changed to much for it to work again⌠we are friends today though, and I can still count on him for anything if I needed.
During the year we tried again we both had said we wish things would have worked out in the past⌠both of us had a couple relationships that never worked out.
I honestly cannot give the advise based on my own marriage, but my parents n grandparents never divorced, they worked it outâŚ
Good luck on whatever decision you make. 
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Pray to God. I understand the need for passion and romance. However your husband sounds genuine and he is trying. Him trying should be enough for you to never leave.
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He sounds amazing, especially since he still gives you attention,respects you,helps you out and is a great guy. Thatâs what I always wanted in life. Except I attract selfish People so Iâm not even dating anymore. You literally should have gotten sex toys to help out⌠He fixed himself, why havenât you? Yes divorce him, if you donât, you will damage a great guy who did everything he could to please someone who doesnât even care or want to try. Sad now that he will most likely go downhill as a person, hopefully he doesnât mistreat future partners. For the kids sake, donât be petty and vindictive. Be honest with him & let him be free. Since he hurt himself, he should go to therapy and you need to see one as well. âSparksâ is another word for âLust/desireâ, so your seeking a new penis & a new body to fondle. You might not come across another guy thatâs ânice/attentiveâ to your needs. That shit fades quickly after the âexcitementâ period⌠Everyone knows that. Next time just donât get married.
Main point, be honest with him, divorce, donât be vengeful, donât use kids as a weapon & go fill your sex drive with new partners. If you get bored easily with sex, do one night stands. Donât ever settle.
Have you been reading romance novels? Watching that Netflix series that all the ladies are talking about? Itâs absolutely your choice to leave if youâre not happy, but what youâre looking to find isnât going to last in the long run.
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What would Jesus want you to do easy answer
Marriage is work. Have you talked to him about perhaps going back out on dates or figuring a way to find the spark that brought yâall together to begin with? You have to keep the passion alive. I do understand what youâre going through. Why my ex husband and I divorced after 8yrs of marriage. Lost that spark. But we talked about it and tried to bring it back. You at least have to try first before throwing in the hat.
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Love changes over time. The once time consuming obsession when we first meet doesnât last throughout the years. Once kids are involved it changes. Your priorities change as well. But that said, you do what you need to do to be happy. If itâs stay in the marriage because you get along and itâs good for the kids then you try new things to make it work. If you want to leave, then leave. No one can tell you what to do or give you that âah haâ moment,
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A love that consumes you ? Lol you have 3 kids . They should consume you . Grow up 
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Well if my bf couldnât perform anymore I be fine with it I am in love with him not sex.
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Our idea of love is not what love really is most of the time. Maybe you each have different love languages. Relationships have many different stages too. Donât make the mistake of being unhappy with yourself or where you are in life and projecting that onto your marriage. Only you know what is best for you. A love that consumes you usually fades or is toxic though. Having a best friend that helps you that you can also call your husband is not something every one gets to experience.
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Spice it up! He isnât the only one that needs to make you happy! Do thing that make you happyâŚyou have to change your whole mindsetâŚyou have a great man which many ppl would love to have âŚFYI ainât sh@t out here in the streets
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Grow up! Life isnât like the romantic novels or movies. It is real, day to day living, some good, some not so good. Give your marriage time and, if you want it to work out it will. Been there done that. Just celebrated 60 yrs married. Hasnât all been a bed of Roseâs, but with alot of work and prayer here are and very happy.
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It sounds like you donât want to be happy with him. Maybe you should work on you in counseling. He may not be the problem.
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I sympathize with you I pray that you find it in your heart to allow Jesus Christ to move in your life god is the answer
Sounds like your expecting a fairy tail relationship- just remember the grass is not always greener on the other side. If your truly unhappy than thatâs one thing but it sounds more like youâve hit a rut in your marriage- try to spice things up- communication is key- introduce toys in the bedroom to ensure your happy- there are plenty of ways to âspice up your marriage or bring the passion backâ you just have to put in the effort. If your truly unhappy than leave- if your only leaving because you think love exists like you see in the movies than you may want to reconsider as real life is much different- any NEW relationship is going to be exciting- because itâs new but just like any child with a new toy the new wares off - every time and once that new wares off you will always have to put in the work to keep up- so you need to figure out if you want to re-establish that with your husband or if you want to try to find someone new (where you will inevitably have to re-establish it anyway one day)
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Is polyamory an option
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After you have been married for a few years you will no longer have the experience of a love that consumes you! You will no longer be obsessed with your partner. This is normal. The feeling you are speaking of comes from oxytocin. As you settle into the familiarity with your partner your body will stop producing as much oxytocin. There are things you can do to increase it, but it will never be the same as it was in the beginning. A true loving marriage is exactly as you described, at least on your husbandâs behalf. You need to work on you to improve your sexual encounters with experimentation with things that spice up your sexual behavior encounters. The only way to continually experience what you are speaking about would be to change partners every few years. By doing this you will never experience a true and deep bond with a life partner.
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you need to spice up your relation ship it will only hurt the kidâs
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When youâre truly in love with your partner or spouse youâll be happy and itâll be like the excitement of dating always. My husband and I have been together for 17 years and married for 14. We also have a teenage daughter. True love is making time for eachother and not guilting eachother. Even with children. I think you need to leave, focus on your kids and then figure out the love thing later.
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Read the Love Dare, read the 5 love languages, watch the movie Fireproof. Youâre love tank is empty because you both are not speaking the love languages that speak to each otherâs needs. and I realize you said donât suggest counseling but thatâs just what this situation needs.
Bond together play games boar games card games, quality time together build a foundation.
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Loving someone is a choice, through all things in life. Itâs not always easy. It takes both of you to continue the passion, or in your case begin again. If everything works so well, try, keep trying, and find that love again.
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Sounds like a you issue.
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Maybe you should have your hormones checked it could be you in more ways than one. Personally, you will never find what youâretalking about outside of books and movies, a relationship is way more than sex and you never get those first thrills back! Love is not sex sex is not love. Love is facing life together sharing years, memories and experiences together. There is no perfect guy, everyone has faults just different. The grass may look greener on the other side of the fence but it all has brown spots.
If it was the other way around he would have left you already.
Donât feel guilty and go find your happiness. Kids grown up and get married and they really wonât care that you stayed with him.
Put yourself first and be happy. Live is too short.
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You should know a âlove that consumes youââŚwillâŚconsume you, and it ainât a good thing.
You seem to have the whole grass is greener thing happening in your head and I wonât suggest anything apart from thinking real long and hard about this. Leave if you want but keep in mind that he will also move on from you, donât know if youâve considered thatâŚ
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Sometimes the love and passion that you think you want can be dangerous. It can consume you so much that you lose you. You can turn into a whole different person that in the end your or your family may not like. Donât get greedy, learn how to spice up what you already have. I know it might be hard but change your whole thought process and remember how things used to be. I just think youâre asking for trouble for what you are seeking.
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Sex complicates alot of relationships. Most couples do not make love, they have sex and think it is making love.
Sounds like you need to start working on yourself and start talking to him about how you feel. Communication is one of the big keys to any relationship.
you want someone to talk you about this message me. i was married young was with my husband for 13 years 4 children. i know what your going through and are feeling. but advice so out in the open changes how others think and view you. in the end of it all someone always feels hurt but there is a way to make u both happy and keep the kids happy.
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Good guys are hard to find. If you really want to risk throwing that away for some hot and heavy romance go ahead but donât expect him to stick around when your little adventures are done
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You will regret leaving him for an unrealistic idea of love and marriage. One has highs and lows and he is not responsible for your 100% happiness. Work on yourself and work on marital emotional intimacy and you will be amazed⌠hubs too!
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I understand where you are coming from. There was a time when things worked, I think you need to start over from the beginning, take sex off the table and donât act like a married couple. Just date each other and act like a couple of school kids. Try new things and make it exciting for both of you. You obviously love each other and deserve to be happy. Good luck and God Bless
Sound like your mind is made up ,I sure wished my husband hadnât left.because he wanted to live a single live he got married early ,bull,he married so as the divorce was finally
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Go see about depressionâŚeven though you may not think it isâŚit could beâŚor maybe CounselingâŚit may just be âgetting boringâ⌠I would try counseling âŚif your really wanting to try and fix it if possibleâŚbut if you really dont want to try an fix itâŚthen leave âŚdont make a scene for the kidsâŚthey will realize when they get older and you can explain to them why yal arenât togetherâŚ
I left a guy for this reason and regretted it ever since⌠all the other qualities are so important in hindsight⌠I have been alone with my kids for years now as it is hard to meet someone who has the qualities and the chemistry but I get that you are unhappy and prob feel a bit trapped
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So, he needed âhelpâ and didnât get it because it was embarrassing. He now gets said âhelpâ and you feel nothing for him? Sounds like itâs you and not him. If youâre not happy, leave, you deserve it. But donât blame him when he had issues. Donât stay for the kids.
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Sounds like you guys need to get away for a bit. Go on dates again. People change over time. Find each other again. Once a year, take a short trip without the kids. Doesnât have to be extravagant. Or maybe once a month go get a hotel room for the weekend. Find what made you love him in the first place. youâve got an amazing dude and you will regret leaving that behind.
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In long run whatever youâre looking for doesnât exist.
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The green grass on the other side of the fence is full of poisonous snakes and still needs to be mowed!!! You are so lucky and do not know it!!! You should count your BLESSINGS!!!
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You could do what I did in that situation and leave. Then regret it because he really was a great guy and most others out there arenât. They might not treat your kids the way they deserve or be there for you when you really need someone. The grass is not always greener but saying that they donât deserve someone pulling them in and pushing them away because they are nice and do deserve to be happy. They will pass all that adoration onto someone else.
I guess my advice is really make sure you canât make it work before you make your decision.
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Another reason these kids today grow up without 2 Parents , Turn the FNâ Soap Operas Off , Wake Up !!
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That obsessive consuming love youâre looking for is going to leave you down bad and hurt. Watch this show on Netflix called âsex lifeâ watch the whole thing through, thereâs only one season⌠and see if you still feel the same after. You can fall back in love you CAN! I know itâs hard and the romance leaves but look at him and remember when your first met, your first time with him⌠when you found out he was gonna be a daddy and gave you your first little blessing love and marriage and relationships are so hard but mama you can for sure do it if you really try. Talk to him about how you feel fr let him try to fix this. Both of you 
id kill to have somebody love me like that⌠as far as the manipulation ⌠that wasnât okay but he probably really felt that way in the moment. Youâre the love of his life girl. A lot of men are DAWGS. I felt the way you wanna feel about my babyâs dad and he abandoned me and our son right as he was born for another woman, hold on to your man girl! You donât want some other woman to have what you donât anymore! Thatâs a feeling youâll never get over. Itâs hard to miss something you already have trust me. Watch that show. Itâs sooooo enlightening.
U better rethink your relationship with him. Thereâs isnt any man you age that wants to take on all those kids and probably want as good to u as he is.
You and him need to go to a sex counselor and figure out what your problem is. Have u already sleeping around on him?
Be careful the grass always looks greener on the other side.
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tell him how u feel, also how long ago did u do counseling? its not always a thing that needs to happen for one thing. one thing to realize too, love isnât always passionâŚit ebbs and flows so if u arenât ok on the times it is ebbing., u will find urself dissatisfied with anyone. passion is wonderful but the everyday happens too in long term relationships so its not gonna be passionate all the time. are u still resentful he waited to get help? did u quit trying and now donât want to try to rekindle? its takes 2 and u both have to work for it of u want to save it and its gonna mean some uncomfortable talks and coming out of comfort zones for both
Mary Plado - Varghese
Stay dont mess up 4 lifes
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Sending you all my love. You are not alone.
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Sounds like you need a vacation and more date nights with your man. You also need to spice things up, so think how you can verbalize what youâre needing. When your relationship works, he is amazing to you and your kids⌠itâs not the time to throw in the towel. Sex and passion can easily be ignited again. Thatâs peanuts compared to chemistry and friendship! Figure it out!
I would stay and find the passion again. Trust me when I left I realized I made a huge mistake (we also had our first young) and my husband ended up in another relationship. It literally tore me to pieces. We eventually worked everything out slooooowly but it was one of the worst times in my life. He sounds like a great man and an awesome father and friend. The passion will come back âŚeventually 
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There hardly ever is a perfect relationship. Yours doesnât seem to be too bad and your kids happy. Try and work it out. Sex isnât everything and comes and goes. You may find that love and taking care of each other and your children in the end may end up to be lasting and give you more ground in this life. Leaving is quite often the easy way out and the grass is always greener⌠good luck on your decision
Let us know how it goes. We all took the time and interest 
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Love is a verb. Itâs not a noun. Itâs not something that you fall into. Itâs an action that you choose to do everyday
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No one is about the vales you took to love to death do you part in sicknesses and health.so easy to call it quits.
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Girl, what youâre craving is lust not love. Sounds like youâve already told yourself why you should stay, and the one reason you want to leave already doesnât seem like enough to you. What you are really asking is for everyone to tell you itâs okay to walk away. And I hate to disappoint you but the reason youâre not going to hear that much is because sex with any partner whether married or otherwise can tend to fade out. The last, the âmagicâ the goosebumps, all tend to fade because itâs driven by chemical reactions in your brain and hormones running crazy. It isnât real. You could be sleeping with Thor himself 
heâs hot just sayinâŚand after 8 years itâs gonna fizzle out. Life gets busy and people start to get predictable and boring. Itâs your role as a partner to find ways to keep it alive. Sounds like heâd be willing. Relationships take work, on both ends. What are you trying to keep it alive because it isnât only his job, its yours too. And just because he cut once doesnât mean heâs manipulating you, if it were a repeated behavior then you can point that finger but perhaps after 9 years you leaving feels like the end of his world. No matter what if you leave based on the sex alone youâll never know if you had the strength to make it work and youâll likely run into the same issue with the next guy when he gets boring and thatâs if you find one worth sticking withâŚits harder than you think!!! Best suggestion anyone can give youâŚFind a way to spice up that sex life. Youâre not the first person to complain about it and you wonât be the last either. But when men get bored and go cheat women everywhere are ready to hang him out to dry. How would you feel if he cheated because youâre boring? You both have to try!!!
Work on it. Remember why you loved him in the first place.
Getting divorced means youâre each going to see your children only half the time, and itâs an automatic invitation to invite others into your childrenâs lives that you may not want.
It sounds like you have some resentment, maybe even subconsciously. See a counselor and get it all out. Give it a chance. If he loves you and heâs willing to work it out, then donât throw it away.
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All Iâm gonna say is your right life is way to shirt to stay if you not feeling the connection. I know you wanna stay for the kids but think about you also. You canât give your kids 100% if your not even giving yourself 100%
âI donât want to tryâ
âI donât love himâ
âHeâs a good manâ
âNo counseling, donât suggest itâ
Not to be mean but why are you here for advice then? You sound like your mind is made up. Youâre done and you donât want to be together anymore. I think he definitely deserves someone better than you. Someone who will actually be in love with him. Imagine if he told you that? Like others said⌠the grass isnât always greener. Youâre not bound to find someone who meets every single want and need that you desire. It takes hard work.
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You really seem selfish. Fireworks every dayâŚdoesnât exist. Be realistic.
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Invest in toys. Lots of toys.
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Good men are hard to find and if you leave it will be the biggest regret of your life .
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Single ladies grab him up!!! He wonât be single for long good men are hard to findâŚDrop his number for my friend!
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Love is a choice. Not just a feeling.
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Wow⌠Guess you want sex more then someone that takes care of you and your kids âŚim sure theres a dead beat dad out there some where that can stay at home cause he to lazy to work and be your lil sex slave
Him being a great guy is irrelevant. Not all good people are meant to be stayed with. If you donât love him, leave him. Not doing so now makes you a shitty person. And he clearly deserves better.
Counseling, it helps, but your both going to have to go and be honest.