My husband has taken leave from work and will not be back until after Valentines day…we are taking a mini vacation to see my family…I went out to his car to make sure my charger was in there for the drive because we were about to head out…there was a valentines card in the glove box…it was from a co-worker…I have met her…it said, “Thanks for always helping me when I need it and thanks for the rose…it was super sweet, Happy Valentines day, love you and can’t wait for you to be back at work!” When I confronted him he told me he bought her the rose bc her mom recently passed and he wanted to show his support to her which I get…and he said she thanked him with the card…okay I get that but does it seem more than friendly to anyone else?Now I am worried he is seeing her behind my back…
Red flags red flags everywhere!!!
The I love you part !!!
The fact she said love you too him. Huge red flag…
Umm ya I dare some woman to tell my husband they love him… Definitely an affair going on
Sounds like a whole lot of talking is going to be happening on this trip. Bc either this woman doesn’t understand appropriate boundaries, your husband doesn’t, or he’s cheating. This isn’t a normal social interaction between coworkers. So you have a couple options… therapy with him or divorce. It could be from a lack of boundaries which therapy will help instill them. And if it’s cheating then you know get a lawyer, go to the doctor, gather important documents, etc.
“Love you” though? Thats a bit much
Wouldn’t a thank you card be a little more appropriate than a valentine’s day card?
My husband gave me the “I was there for her when her mom died” story too…he’s cheating on you…sit back and pay attention to his Behavior and get your ducks in a row. Look, at first you’re in denial because you don’t want to believe it but deep down you know if he’s been different, distant….I’m sorry you’re in this place but it gets better. Go to therapy and find strength for you and do what’s right for yourself
I would go right to her and ask her right out
Nah cause nobody going on vacation after that.
When you are sad, hurting, having a rough day…does he buy you flowers?
I wouldn’t of last that car ride on vacation
Thanking with a Valentine’s Day card is strange in itself, plus the I love you? It’s just odd. Wouldn’t he mention the mom dying to you in conversation? Hate to say it but it’s all very bizarre.
Go with your gut. Feel if he wasn’t hiding something he would’ve told you about the card. Saying I love you to someone else’s husband if you’re not all close friends is overstepping and inappropriate. Good luck sorting it out.
Lmao that’s the best lie he could come up with? If her mom died the entire office would’ve given her a group gift. If he gave her a single rose separate from the group gift that’s super suspicious.
I was thinkin’ nah completely harmless until she wrote “Love you”. I’d be confronting her away from your husband. Then the next red flag; a single red rose for someone passing? Why not a small bouquet of flowers. Alarm bells would be ringing
My husband would have talked to me about buying someone a gift why did he go behind your back and buy a single rose and then gift it and not say anything to you I would sit him down and talk things out and get to the bottom of the situation
I need more information. Was the card a funny card, friendly card or mushy thoughtful.card? I say I love you to all my friends. I would buy my work friends a card. Maybe she bought multiple cards for her coworkers and said something nice in each one.
This is just me but why not bring an innocent gift into the house and tell you about it. I would of helped eat the chocolate s. If I had found that the way you did I would be requesting help on how to hide his body. That’s just my take.
I love my friends. I don’t buy VD cards expressing that to them though.
This is a little weird.
Friendships are important and we all need and deserve them, I just think the “I love you” is a bit much.
Hell to the no. It could’ve been a simple thank you card and not a Vday card.
don’t jump the gun immediately try to get more info. But definitely seems weird. If her mom just died did she give everyone that gave their condolences Valentine’s Day cards that say I love you?
I tell everyone I care about “I love you” since 2020 when a friend I had been working with for years trying to get him into recovery finally went, got a little clean time, picked up again and d*ed, by himself, no one found him for a few days even:broken_heart: So I say it to everyone! Bc you never know what it might mean to them, I go out of my way to give folks positivity… If i notice something, I will message in the middle of the night if that’s when I come up with it… Again, bc you have no idea what someone’s going through:woman_shrugging: My comments can be the thing that changes their mind from using again, giving up entirely, and IT HAS HAPPENED! I can’t tell you how many messages I’ve gotten where that 1 small thing was just enough, not everyone gets that reassurance every time but that doesn’t mean they shouldn’t be kind to those around them. I’m going to be the odd ball out here and say that this all just sounds like work kindness to me, she was going through something and your husband went out of his way to be kind, so she in turn took the next holiday to do the same:woman_shrugging: She did not say “I love you” she used “love you” which at my work, we all say I love you to one another:100: I cannot imagine my husband getting this jealous over every conversation, every person I pick up and spend time with, every person I spend money on to help them in treatments, etc:face_with_peeking_eye: I’d have to leave my field, seriously:100:
The problem I can see here is that he hid it rather than telling you about it, but if this was going to be your reaction and he already knew that, I can see why he would also😬 Communication is very important in a relationship but so is understanding, and unfortunately we don’t all work hard enough at either🤷♀️ If you want your partner to be honest with you then you need to be open to hearing them out and not jumping to conclusions. Until they give you reason not to trust them, you trust what they tell you🤷♀️ I would discuss the hiding the card and not telling you about them being closer than you thought, but if you continue on like he’s already cheated, I don’t think he’ll be willing to be honest with you in the future. The idea that we get with a kind, great hearted partner and then we ONLY want that energy poured into us is quite toxic imo😬 I love when my husband is good to others, bc that’s the kind of people we are💖 And he loves what I do and he supports me to do it every single day Bc we WERE those individuals with no support system, no family, no help, who had to claw out of Substance Use Disorder (SUD) by ourselves and it was SO MUCH HARDER😪 We both believe now in being the change we want to see! And that involves us both giving up things in our home, our relationship, our family, our business, to do those things we want to see💖 It’s hard, but it’s totally possible with Good communication and understanding
Well dang I must be cheating on my husband with both men and women. I’m on FMLA and working from home to take care of my mom. I get the I can’t wait for you to get back to the office from the men daily and the love you from the ladies. I get valentine cards from them too and gifts because I do nice things for them. Why would he put the card in the glove box if he were cheating? To get caught? I doubt it unless he’s stupid. You’re on a road trip with him talk it through.
Love you and can’t wait for you to be back!? nah something is up
Your thoughts are correct!! He is!!!
Ok first of all you gotta chill. I’m not the type to cheat on anyone however I have said I love you to lots of guy co workers as there are different types of love. I would ask yourself if there is no trust left and you feel as if he’s cheating then you need to ask yourself why. A relationship without mutual trust is headed towards disaster. But I wouldn’t say this immediately leads to him cheating. If there is more to the story than maybe so but a card in the glove box that says love you doesn’t in my book. And before you ask yes I have been cheated on many times.
He kept it in the car, and the “I love you”and the “I can’t wait for you to be back”
I guess I’d be worried if my husband doesn’t buy me roses.
A single rose is not for sympathy, single rose is romance. Hiding it in the glove box. There’s something going on.
Um no woman ever just says I love you to another man for just a rose and I can’t wait for you to come back to work
Um I would be very mad. Something is fishy going on
I think it sounds a little too friendly and my husband would never bc he’s knows I’m batshit crazy.
There isn’t a problem in being nice or showing sympathy for a friend, but there’s a difference between doing that or maybe taking the gesture too far and giving her the opportunity to get the wrong idea.
I would definitely keep questioning to see if the story changes at all.
It sounds like she & your husband are friends. She’s going through a rough time & wanted to thank him. Maybe a valentine’s card isnt the best choice. But would a thinking of you or other type of card bother you less? I don’t see anything romantic in what she wrote.
How long have they known each other? That will be what decides my answer.
No. You don’t say thank you with a valentines card and say I love you. And you don’t show condoléances with a rose. He’s lying.
Go to the main source and get her side versus his side but in all honesty he’s probably having an affair!!
#1 she told him she loved him
#2 the card was in the glove box
#3 If she’s only a good friend that he’s that close to then why haven’t you met this woman?
Something more than co worker going on…the rose and the card saying I love you
Love you? Valentine’s card …. And a rose…. That’s a little to friendly.
A thankyou card. Fine. But a married person doesn’t need a love you in the card unless it’s family.
Card should of come inside and he should of showed his wife. Not hide it in his glove box.
Has he got her phone number?
Someone passed away / he should of mentioned it to you …Hey honey a co workers something passed away I’m gunna just send her flowers as condolences… be honest about it.
Tell him to find another job haha see what he says.
Did he throw it in the bin? Or want to keep it.
Go to his work an give him a big smooch in front of the co worker see how he reacts and her.
I say love you to my male friends/coworkers. My hubby says love you to his female friends. He is a truck driver so he has no “coworkers.” He would have thrown it away so there was no evidence, if he was cheating.
Hire a private investigator…do they chat outside of work? If not then it could be innocent. If they do then they probably have something going on. Our coworker are really close at my job and we tell each other love you but we are mostly all girls.
They also make these voice activated recording pens you can buy on Amazon which are so discreet you could plant it on him like if he works at a desk and find out what’s going on; there are all types of difference small recording devices you could use if a pen isn’t feasible lol
That’s definitely not the way to show appreciation for a coworker nice gesture.
There’s something going on between them
Always listen to your little voice. It is usually right.
“Love you”!?!!!?!!!? That tells you everything right then and there. Demand his phone/email/laptop/whatever and go through it before he can delete.
A conversation needs to be had. It sounds like he probably didn’t mean anything by it, just being nice, but she’s definitely got other ideas. Men can be obtuse and not think anything about it so definitely talk to him about it and what you’re feeling.
A rose isn’t appropriate for a sympathy- why would he buy a single rose… that’s a love gesture not a sorry your mom died gesture. Especially near V-day, roses are hella expensive. Something else is going on - either they are both losing boundaries and something will happen or something is already happening:
Love you bothers me but can’t wait for you to be back at work… hmmmm
The love you was your first clue
Rose for her…? Something is up.
Just becuz her mom passed buy her a rose?
Crazy…sympathy card is good enuff
Everyone saying do u not tell ur friends you love them I get … however look at the bigger picture if it’s innocent why’s it hidden and why would he not tell you think that says it all really why not say I brought so in so a rose to make them feel better even if the card was meant in a romantic way. Why would he have not said to u he recived it may make u annoyed but atleast it’s honest and he’s told you now that’s how I’d say it was innocent not telling you says one thing to me and sadly I don’t think it’s what u wanna hear
First all why a valentine card? If it was just a thank you card and she wrote that it would be different… keep your eyes open lady
I don’t like that it was left in car. If it was a “thank you” why hide it
We’d be stopping in at his work before we went on vacation I’d wanna pay my respects to her dead mother as well.
You’ll know if he’s full of shit if he starts acting uncomfortable when you pull in the parking lot.
Just feel like there are other flower types to get for that occasion a rose is meant for love
Bull crap…they know a lot about each other and they are absolutely sleeping together if not they are wanting too.
I’m checking his phone and depending how that goes taking the trip to see family alone
I would send one to her as well since it’s just courtesy to see how she reacts.
Why a valentines card . Why not just a thank you card . That is wrong in a lot of ways .
It’s the love you that throws me off
Unless she is an older/elderly/or into girls co-worker that’s a big no from me. I would lose it. And the fact that he didn’t tell you about it…even more of a no from me.
If it were support , why didn’t he tell you about it ?? Sounds like cheating to me . Or at the very least she is wanting more
Take vacation. Tell him when you get back he don’t need to unpack. Oh and give him a rose.
Bottom line, do you trust your Husband if you do then No Worries.
Something is going on that he’s not telling you about so sorry you’re going through this
Oh yeah I would definitely find out
He wouldn’t have hidden it ! He would have brought it in and put on counter and said this is what I did and so she gave me this card!
my bf buys stuff for his friends at work but he doesn’t hide it and we shop together
Love you??!! Not okay one bit.
Definitely having an affair
His vacation would be turning into a moving trip
I think he has a friend, not cheating.
Sorry that doesn’t sound normal to me,
He is cheating
If the card was no big deal and innocent then why was it in the glove box?
Awe naw Dawn Amanda Servis it’s the work wife
They on the road to humptown
Yeah I’m not buying it.
You have to actually ask…
It is the first step in an emotional affair which with time and poor judgement will be a full blown romantic affair. Nip in the bud with counciling…
Sounds like they have an emotional affair
I don’t see a problem with it, I’ve giving Valentine’s card to my male mates
There’s definitely more to that and the fact he didn’t tell u about it is a big red flag
I have never said I love you to another man other than my husband and male family members, but another random man no. Especially a coworker. Something’s weird about it
You only write “love you” to people that you are close with. I only say love you to my husband, best friends, and those I consider family. I wouldn’t panic, but I would definitely be suspicious and ask questions. Huge red flag.
“Love you and can’t wait for you to be back at work”. This is alarming!
Love you? Can’t wait for you to get back? Why not send flowers to the funeral home? It’s shocking to me the outlandish things people believe. Come on lady. This guy fed you a crock of BS.
Double homocide if some chick told my partner she loved him
Dead mom or not my man better never buy another woman any kind of flower. Tf?
Most of y’all are red flags. You can love friends platonically. Even being the opposite sex. Y’all weird.
Inappropriate definitely and maybe on his part its innocent but on her part it’s probably shit stirring if she wasn’t interested in him den she would of sent a thank you card , im not saying he is cheating but its definitely something you need to watch
Guess your making a quick pit stop before leaving to see what’s up lol
A man doesn’t buy another woman a rose regardless of thr situation huge red flag let alone the I love you part and for him to hide this from you
Best thing to do is approach the woman (as nicely as you can, so you don’t appear to be “the crazy one”, just in case it is genuine. The bit that is worrying is the “I love you” and the fact he gave her a rose, normally it would be a bunch of flowers. So sorry you’re having to go through this x
Wait love girl don’t be be blindsided - he playing men do what they want to and if he didn’t want too he wouldn’t
You don’t say I love you to a co worker no matter how thoughtful you are don’t seem right if I’m honest n disrespectful on your part either
Umm you don’t buy roses for someone’s death and you don’t buy a valentines card to say thank you.
Def something going on.
Why did she say "love you "
It’s time for some random visits to his work. “Just in the area thought you might need a coffee and donut” I think you need to show that he is in a relationship, not stuck in a loveless life where he isn’t appreciated. If there is an inappropriate relationship developing now is the time to fight back without being dramatic (yet!)
I would rock up just before his lunch break at work and surprise him and say I brought us some lunch as a thankyou and to show you how much I love being your wife and then say to the female I so sorry to hear about your mother passing away to see the reactions on there face
Total sus. friendship part I get but the single rose and her “I love you” nah. He has a long ass road trip ahead of him if he was my husband.
Red flags everywhere Those is so funny lol