I just found out last night My boyfriend of 4 years and father to my daughter had been cheating on me. I found that he had dating apps and cash apping women, probably for only fans. And was some hundreds of dollars. He had told me he didn’t have any money for formula and diapers and stuff for our daughter so many times, and I had to scrape together what I could be a stay at home mom. I’m shaking. He withheld not only from me but from the basic necessities our baby girl needs to live. I am in disbelief. I just don’t even know how to handle my emotions right now. There was so many sickening things that have come to light. Any tips on being strong and getting through this???
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Been there!! One day at a time. Some days 1 step at a time
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Leave him first off all. Take baby and go stay with your parents or a friend. If he’s willing to without necessities from the baby especially, he’s worthless.
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Walk away save yourself the heart break of going through it again. And just take it one day at a time. It gets better.
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Do crack. It’ll numb your pain and maybe you’ll just leave.
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First, get rid of him. You dont need a toxic person in your life right now. Its hard but you can do you this. You’ll get through this 
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Your daughter is the reason you should be strong kids can sense when there is something wrong I was a single mom of 2 for 6 years cuz my ex hubby cheated on me and left me for someone else as much as I wanted to break down I had my girls to care for and think about so I focused on them
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Leave babe, trust me! I stayed in a 13 year relationship that just continued to cheat !
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I’m hoping you already left. Please go stay with family or a friend of you can. It will be hard ar first, but you will get through it
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Leave his ass! Find you a better man!
Leave and get some new dick that will spoil you 
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He’s a piece of shit and that’s putting it lightly. I’ve been in your spot. They never change be strong for your daughter. She shouldn’t see her mother in a relationship like that.
I have a hard time believing that he will change cause he should have thought of you and your daughter
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Yeah never rely on anyone except yourself.
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Um,kick him to the curb. Your kids and you deserve better
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Leave, file for child support…it will be hard at first. Given time you won’t regret it.
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Let yourself feel the shock
Its there for a reason.
Lots of deep breaths and feel the feelings…
Your going to be in for a long road with or without him girl.
Best wishes hunn.
Keep reaching out to stay strong
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You have a daughter. One day she will grow up and encounter a boy like this. Make each step with deliberate intentions of showing her how to move on and prosper. And when you do, throw it back in his face with a smile. Also, immediately go file for child support. You can do that while still living together in most states. Lets see what habits he can keep up when he actually has to pay for the life he created. Dont let him pay you. Make him pay through an agency or court. That way, he will be less likely to try to skirt it. Trust me on this one!
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The best tip I can think of. Focus on all the love you have for your baby girl, and remember you’re doing it all for her. Love your baby more than you hate him for the betrayal. Definitely look into sole custody arrangements and filing child support. If he won’t step up and provide willingly you make him under the court of law. You have every right to deny him access to his child if he doesn’t even care if she has the necessities she needs, he certainly shouldn’t have the privilege of spending any time for free around her. You do what you need to for your young. Once you have a child sadly it’s no longer just about you. Do what’s best in the long run for your daughter. Let the cheater lie in the bed he’s made, learn from your pain rather than wallow in it. Nows not the time to crumble. She needs you most now at your strongest. You can’t do anything about the time and money lost, but you can do something about the future in the present
You don’t realize how strong you are, until you HAVE TO BE…
Now is your time. You got this… Look in your daughters face, and you won’t even question it. Ask yourself if you would want her to forgive or accept the same for herself out of relationships…? Do you want this to be what’s modeled for her in her future relationships?
Don’t give him the power or chance to hurt you any further/again.
You can do this.
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wasted 8 years with one like that slept with anything i mean anything stole from me my kids out of their piggie banks and even stole from his friends and then left me for one of the ones he slept with and marrie dher no less i had to force him to go he was mentally and physically abusive so i had to get a restraining order to get him out he thought hed control me and sleep with her at night 
take your baby girl and leave dont keep hoping he will change because creeps like that dont .
I’m sorry for what your going through… just know your worth believe in your worth … any “man” that can’t provide the necessities for his family let alone child bc he’s busy giving it away on such a site is just not a man and it’s time to leave . This is so sad and disappointing I’m just hurt for you reading this. Focus on you and your child let that baby be your strength to get out of this you deserve better
First off throw him out & his stuff
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Leave him & go find a better one!!!
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If it were me, he’d be gone …
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Time to focus on you and your daughter. Be strong and walk away.
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Girl I have been in that position, LEAVE and never turn back. It will be hard at the beginning but sooooo worth it in the end.
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Leave. If you forgive him, the trust isn’t there anymore. Respect won’t be there as well. You’ll end up fighting. Save your heart.
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Take one day at a time. Don’t expect too much from yourself, and don’t be too hard on yourself if you don’t meet your expectations. I used music to help me through my divorce. Certain songs just made me feel strong. “Fight Song,” “One Step At A Time,” “Survivor” (by Reba). Songs like that just made me feel like I could get through anything. I also wrote about it, but I’m a writer, so that’s one of my coping mechanisms. It’s okay to be sad and it’s okay to cry. It’s okay to talk about it. Just make sure your needs are being met, and obviously the needs of your little girl. I’m so sorry you’re dealing with this. Don’t let him try to convince you to take him back because he can and will do it again. Cut the cord now so that there’s no chance of him coming back. You deserve better, even if it doesn’t feel like it.
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Run it off momma. I was given an old ass treadmill and it kept me sane af. Even just 10 min. The second you feel sad you hit it.
Thro the whole man out
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Your bf, like many husbands, boyfriends, partners, etc is a trick 
he likes to trick his money off on women. Nothing wrong with that as long as you take care of basic necessities FIRST. Which he did not do. I wouldn’t call that cheating lol. But def untrustworthy 
and irresponsible. Which is shitty. The actions of others don’t reflect poorly on you… do what’s best for you and baby girl. If you feel like that’s leaving, do that. meditate on it & take action.
I’m so sorry. You and your daughter deserve much better. It will be hard leaving but just remind yourself of you and your daughter’s worth.
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It’s better to raise your baby alone than to raise them with a POS who isn’t helping anyways. He put looking at other girls naked above your baby. Show him you put her above everything including him. You’ve got this 
My baby is 7, her dad cheated and did a lot of the same stuff when she was 1. Now we have my boyfriend who is the best thing to ever happen to us. You can do it!
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Run as fast as you can! Things will never go back to place and you will regret staying much sooner than later. Specially if he is keeping money from his own daughter, he is a piece of shit.
Leave girl, it’ll just become more toxic leave while your strong
Been through this partner of 5 years slept with my bestfriend and got her pregnant they’re now happily together having a baby its hard but you gotta focus on yourself and your little girl
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Leave him file for child support and take it day by day it will get easier. So sad he spent money on other women and didn’t want to help feed his daughter
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Definitely throw him out and move on be strong for your child because she will give you strength because he’s definitely not worth it and fact he gonna have baby go without that right there would be my wake up call because you wanna take from me that’s different but my kid tf no I’d be gone
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The deal breaker for me would be the fact that he let you struggle to provide the basic needs for your daughter while sending money to other women/ strangers for porn pretty much. He needs to go cause obviously neither of you are his priorities.
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Leave. Be a role model to your girl and show her that no one deserves that. I’ve always said that if you aren’t “good enough” for someone, it’s not your problem. You’ve got this. You’re stronger than you’ll ever know.
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Leave, it’s better for you and your daughter than to put up with a lying piece of crap. It may be hard but you can do it, just have to put your mind to it. I know from experience and I now raise 3 kids on my own so I know it’s possible even though sometimes it can be tough. Just think of it this way would you want your daughter to be in this situation when she grows older because you are her role model.
Throw him out and start your own onlyfans
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Worse than the cheating…how do you tell a stay at home mom you have no money for diapers? Did you both agree on you staying home ?because how are you all supposed to live if he can’t even afford diapers? Sorry but sounds like there are deeper issues here and you need to leave fast. Go live with family if you have to get on your feet and become self sufficient.
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I’d kick him out file for child support and any other assistance you can get, look for a job the same day, file for deferments to not lose your place to stay, ask family for help. I wouldn’t waste any more time on a loser that would do this to his child and the mother of his child. He’s absolute trash!
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Girl this is so hard but let me tell u, you are stronger than u think and when u realize that snd over come this u are gonna feel like a million bucks. Quick story just so u know youre not alone. I found out my babydadd was cheating when he accidentally posted a video of him getting his dick sucked in my car when i was at work and my mom was babysitting my 3 week old because he was “busy”. I had never felt so disgusted and betrayed in my life. Like u were so proud of cheating that u record it? Then all kinds of shit started to come to light. I thought i would never heal. I felt like that was it, this is too much for me to handle emotionally. But once i took some time out to heal and really focused on knowing what im worth and how dumb he was, i felt like a new woman. I was on top of the world and since then ive known i can handle anything thats thrown at me. You are a woman and women are warriors. You have hundreds of sisters on this page that are hear to talk or just be an ear.
Use your anger to your advantage. There is no better revenge than moving on, doing better and being happy. Trust me on this one, there is a better plan for you, you just don’t know it yet. Life has a funny way of working out. Hugs to you. Stay strong momma
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Leave that’s unbelievable! You and your baby deserve better!
Talk to him face to face n ask him why ?
Throw. His. Shit. In. The. Street.
Nothing to go through lol throw the whole man out!
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Leave. Move forward. One day at a time
Kick him to the curb !
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Take care if your child force a smile hold your head high Around him and others and ugly cry at night. You become strong by taking one day at a time
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I went through this, except we were married and it was 5 different girls. I kicked him out, got a job at Walmart right away. Didn’t ask for Alamony nor child support, I just wanted to be done with the nightmare. It was hard, I cried myself to sleep a lot, I got depressed. But In the end I pulled through!!! It wasn’t easy, but I have honestly never been happier than I am today. I found a man who loves me and my son with his entire heart. He treats us like we are his world. I’m not saying it will be an easy road, but it will be so worth it in the end!!! Reach out for mental help if you start to feel too down. It’s not a sign of weakness, but a sign of hope!!!
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Just remember better days are coming! The best way to stay strong is to know you and your daughter deserve the best you will find it. I’m so sorry you are going through this.
I’m so sorry, not just for you but for your daughter, like wtf what type of pos would do that! Leave his ass never look back. If you stay be prepared to face this again maybe even more. I know it’s hard to leave Especially being a stay-at-home mom But if there is a will there is a way look at your daughter she deserves so much better than that. Keep your head up
Leave. Immediately.
Go to your parents, siblings, cousins, aunts/uncles, ANYONE who is willing to help.
Leave him asap.
Throw the whole man away and start over. You and your daughter deserve better
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You dump the man and raise your daughter! Once a cheater always a cheater. Just now they know how to hide it better, leave for your daughters sake!!
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Too many women stay in unhealthy relationships, wasting years of their life and wishing they had left sooner years down the road when all desire to stay have gone. Being with him now, you won’t ever trust him again, and it will drive you crazy and make life unhealthy for u and your child. Leave and start a new life. He has no respect for you or his kid if he’s willing to do those things.
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Stay strong…move on…
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Learn to love and respect yourself first…,He’s a loser, get rid of him
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Be calm. Think ahead. Get all of your ducks in a row. Then, get him.
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Girl message if you need to talk. I went through this I’ll be honest…
You need to move on! If you have family or friends near get out!
Leave. Don’t give him a second change.
But don’t use your daughter as a revenge tool. If he makes the effort to see her, and wants to see her, and has never physically harmed her, let your daughter be in his life. You said “sickening” things came to light, so as long as it’s nothing to do with children, don’t keep your daughter away just because he cheated on you. Yes, he could’ve used the money for his daughter, but that’s still not a reason to keep them apart. Now he can figure out how to be a single dad where he HAS to buy diapers and things. He can’t rely on you (or whoever it was) buying the necessities anymore.
However, I can’t emphasize enough to leave him and not give him another chance. You deserve better than that.
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As badly as it hurts to be betrayed by someone you love use logic. The man you loved did not exist this is who he truly is. Thank God you exposed this before you had an even larger family. Any human being who will spend money to satisfy something like that without a care of whether his child’s basic needs are met is not a loss to either of you. The loss you feel is the loss of who you perceived him to be. Get a job or whatever it takes to get the heck away from him. You can do it.
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Working out and doing things for JUST you and your baby! Don’t waste another minute on him. He hasn’t put you first, so now it’s time to put yourself first. There is someone out there that will love you AND your daughter way more than he obviously does. Stay strong and focused for your baby. I started eating healthier and working out and you would not believe the difference it does cleaning the mind and helping focus
Walk away, it’ll never be the same.
This is exactly the reason why women can’t be a stay home mom nowadays. If you are now financially independent, that means that you are at the mercy of someone else. Leading you to endure this kind of bs. Formula and diapers are the definition of basic necessities for a baby. And you allowed yourself to be in a position of having to ask for this things.
I worked out of state in my last trimester. I worked until the last day of my pregnancy, I saved money for maternity as I didn’t have pay maternity. I went back to work 30 days after. I’m married to a great man, but I will never put myself in a position where I have to ask for food to feed my son. Never.
Leave that idiot, and file for child support. A motherfucker who is ok with giving his daughters food money to a whore is not worth it.
Be strong, I really can’t speak for you, but I’m sure your baby girl deserves better than him.
Red flag was he never marrying you and basically trolling you for 4 years. Get out and don’t look back. He will cheat again and again.
Never ever ask yourself
What did i do wrong that he treats me like this. You have to say.
WHATs the matter with.him that he behaves like this
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I have a large trunk
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I have a truck and trailer!!!
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If he can watch his daughter go without for sex, put him in the ditch and move on. Your deserves better above anyone.
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Don’t be like me and stay thinking he will change…11 years later and 3 more women… wasted time. Leave girl, for real.
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Walk away. He does not deserve you. You owe it to yourself and your daughter to leave. Don’t let her grow up thinking this is how her husband will treat her. You are a mom, that means you can do anything you set your mind to.
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Just keep reminding yourself…What a Douchebag he is should help you get thew it
Head up, you are fantastic for picking up his slack. You and your precious baby deserve someone so much better. I’m sorry you’re going through this. If you need to talk , I know what it’s like to be in your shoes, feel free to dm me
Think of your girl. That’s the only thing that got me through
You are strong and sufficient , you don’t need someone like him , do it for you and your little girl you both deserve better than that
I was with my oldest father for 8.5 years all of the where toxic i was blinded by love…and never notice all the toxic things that happen in out relationships till it was to late…get out please don’t that him back.
Always let him be apart of your babys life but never let him make you feel like a bad mom…and if he doesn’t show never lie and talk crap about him she will make her own opinions of him
Hopefully one day your prince will come and treat you and your princess with all the respect and love you deserve
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You need to find a good support group. Hopefully you’ve already kicked his ads to the curb.
He’s already shown you he won’t be responsible abt $ - so definitely take him to court for child support and request he takes parenting classes. He’s proven to be irresponsible when it come to her care as well. If theirs anything else going on that you can lay it on him- do it. Your daughter needs him to grow up for her.
Knowing he’s sent money to other women but couldn’t provide for your daughter should be enough to keep you strong!! You and her deserve so much better!! 
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First of all… why are you still referring to him as your boyfriend? Drop that sorry a$$ fast and move on by using that babygirl as motivation. Your child alone should be the ONLY motivation and strength you need. Child support, childcare assistance, and a job to start. Get on your own two feet and do what mama’s are built for. You got this.
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You guys deserve better. Go.
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Leave him. File for full custody (normally I believe in 50/50 custody, but lying about not being able to buy basic necessities for his daughter is horrible and inexcusable). File for child support. Apply for any assistance you can (WIC, BadgerCare, everything). Good luck hun!
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Dont let him win and dont you dare let him bring you down find your strength through your daughter she is the only one that matters. Kick him to the kerb hun. You are worth so much more. Men are nothing in this society. If youcan kick him out. If not find somewhere safe for you and your daughter to go. Dont listen to his lies dont even get tempted . I wish you the best of luck. You are not alone
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Definitely leave! But the thing that is going to help you get through this is time. It’s going to hurt for a while. You just have to think what’s best for you and your daughter. You both deserve so much better. Over time it’ll get easier.
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Ok heres the deal you have a daughter right ?
If your daughter were in this same situation what would you want/advice her to do . Now do that and do it right now and do not look back .
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Leave. They won’t change. My husband did everything I asked him to do and still 4 years after finding out nothing changed. We were together 5 years when I found out and had just had our second child.
kick his ass to the curb👌
Pray for Strength and then put some land and water between the two of you
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I’d send him to curb if literally chose other women over making sure his daughter was taken care of.
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Leave that man and never look back. You don’t “get through” someone neglecting your child and disrespecting your trust like that. You leave then and never give them an opportunity to cause pain again. Your daughter deserves better and she deserves to have a strong role model mother who shows her what a proper healthy relationship is.
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Walk away!!! You deserve better. Pack up and leave, file a parenting plan there are ways to get the help with that. Make sure you get child support. If he can cheat on you this readily he will never stop, I know from experience.
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Start off by kicking him out. It’s bad enough has cheating on you but when he’s spending money on other women and not even buying nappies for you child then that’s pretty crap. You will do better without him let some other lady put up with him
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Leave his sorry cheating ass it will only get worse never better if he’s doing this show your daughter a better life without a worthless man
Admitting that you should leave is hard especially when their the father and you’ve been with them for so long. But do it, you’ll be so much happier in months to come once your done healing. If you stay you will forever wonder and have anxiety if he’s telling the truth or still lying and cheating.
Do yourself a favour, he didn’t respect you or his daughter! Leave 
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Hopefully by “get through this” you mean the transition to being single? Any man who can’t (or worse) refuses to provide for their child is not a man I am wasting my time on. He’s shown you how little respect he has for you and you relationship AND how poorly he can provide.
Just focus on taking care of you and your child right now. Good luck
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