I found out my husband called my best friend

How would you feel if you found calls from your best friend to your husband in his phone? I asked him to let me borrow his phone to call my mom and he didnt answer me so i picked it up…and when i went to the recent calls my best friends number was there…he said he accidentally butt dialed her and now he will not let me touch his phone…my best friend told me that he called her to ask what she would think i wanted for my birthday but now i feel weird about it because somone is lying…

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Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. I found out my husband called my best friend re

Get over it or just leave.No point in stressing or crying everyday.If u not happy move on

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Doesn’t necessarily mean someone is lying. He very well may have wanted to know what to get you. But, still wanting to surprise you didn’t say so. Look at the whole picture. Has he done anything else to make you feel something is going on? Do you have a reason to not reuse him?

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Does he have a bad history to make you worry, or question him??Maybe they are a planning a surprise for you, and didn’t want to ruin it

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Well for everyone it’s different go with your gut though. See for me if my husband called my best friend but then again my best friend is in a same sex relationship so I have no worries.

To be honest if an occasion is coming up it could be they are planning something special for you. At least I hope that’s what it is.

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Yep and the sad thing is its 2 of the most important people in your life that maybe both are liars :broken_heart:

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If you’re worried your best friend would do something like that to you then maybe you need a new bestie… definitely not trying to sound mean, but with no other context I would absolutely be fine if I saw my best friends name/number on my boyfriend/husbands phone and believe her if she said that it was for a surprise. (Bc if it is then of course he’s gonna lie to try to save the surprise lol)

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Keep your eyes and ears open. I would wait and see if you have a surprise birthday party or something if not you will eventually know what is up

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If you can’t trust your husband, you may want to consider therapy and if the relationship is working. If you can’t trust your best friend not to make advances at your husband or tell you if he tried to -then you need to consider if that relationship is working as well.

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I mean that might seem slightly fishy but my husband is close with my best friend and they text and stuff and I am the same with his best friend ( we have all known each other for 20 years)

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It’s possible. My friends husband contacted me out of the blue, he was planning a surprise birthday party for her and wanted my input. We spoke about it and that was that.

She was so surprised and how he went above and beyond for her on the day was amazing.
Maybe he just wants to know what you want… as besties we just know :blush:

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If he’s your husband he shouldn’t have to call anyone to ask what his wife would want for her birthday….

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I call my friends hubby, we’re all friends. And who knows maybe it is for a legit reason.

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In my situation, I would assume it was a birthday surprise so like…what’s going on in your relationships that makes YOU assume the worst??

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I feel like your friend may be telling the truth. Most guys are terrible with shopping and he probably doesn’t want you to figure out what he’s getting. If they have never given a reason not to trust them then there’s no reason to jump the gun and be suspicious. If it continues to be a sketchy topic after your birthday then dig a little deeper into it.

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Need more details. Is your birthday coming up? Is it a reasonable amount of time to be asking your best friend for gift ideas for you? Do you have any reason to doubt your husband other than this incident? (Did he lie to you in the past… etc)

Honestly, you really don’t have to answer me. Ask yourself the questions above. Communicate with both of them. Get them together in the same room and explain how you’re feeling. If they’re still both dodgy about the situation and something is going on then your best friend is not your best friend and you have to decide on how you’d like to proceed with your relationship with your husband.

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Is it your birthday soon, would that make sense?

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Is ur birthhday coming up ? If so
Maybe it was a surprise and he doesn’t want u snopping on his phone finding it

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One call? That’s not weird. He probably panicked because he was planning a surprise of some sort of genuinely didn’t know what to get you and is embarrassed that he doesn’t. One call isn’t a big deal.

Go online and look up your cell phone bill to reassure you and ease your mind.

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Don’t trust them. He’s cheating. Follow your gut. Fuck them.

While it could be about your birthday, if it’s soon, I’d wait to bring it up

Get the phone records.

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My ex called my best friend and they ended up fucking
Be careful you can’t trust no one

Is you birthday coming up? Is it a surprise?
My husband and bestie always communicate for my big birthdays :partying_face:

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You mean found calls to your best friend

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Maybe he lied cause he didn’t want you to know he’s fishing for something for your birthday maybe he wants the credit??

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Man my husband snap chats calls texts Facebook messages my best friends all 3 of them… I have never ever doubted or questioned why they were talking ever. If you can’t trust your best friend and your husband they are not the right best friend or husband.

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Unless he or she has given you other reasons to think something shady is going on I wouldn’t stress over it just be more observant. If something is going on you’ll definitely find out

Has he ever called your best friend before? Does he usually get you gifts that you like w/o asking for suggestions?

Really? My husband talks to my sisters my best friend he organised a suprise party behind my back with them my sister will message him asking what we are doing and if we can all catch up. If you have doubts maybe you need to rethinkyour friendship. Unless he has given reason for you to be suspicious maybe you need to work on your insecurities and ask why does it bother you.

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They lying… Down together​:flushed::face_with_raised_eyebrow:

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I think he’s trying to surprise you for your birthday. If he’s that type of guy who will go all out for you. I believe the friend is telling the truth but the husband is still want to keep it as a surprise. I would wait for my birthday and see if it was something special. I hope it’s nothing serious.

My husband and best friend talk about those things. I’d assume it was actually a birthday surprise. I know I don’t let my husband go through my phone when I’m in the process of figuring out his birthday, or Christmas. If you know them both to be trustworthy people, don’t overthink. :heart:

Well, if your birthday is coming up, I would wait till after your birthday and reserve judgment. If you find out they’re still talking after that… then you probably have something to worry about.

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My husband contacts my best friend all the time in regards to gifts or how to help me when I’m having issues with my mental health.

If you’re straight away sus, instead of thinking maybe he lied coz it was supposed to be a surprise or because he was embarrassed about having to ask for gift ideas, then the fact he called your friend isn’t actually the issue here…

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We’ve been best friends with our people (they’re married) for 20 years. I call her my wife! I wouldn’t think TWICE if she called my husband :roll_eyes::woman_facepalming:t3: this seems like a way bigger issue, she obviously doesn’t trust him or why would she even ask.

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They are both lying. They are seeing each other…let him go & move on

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Maybe it’s about your bday …

If your birthday is close it sounds reasonable

I wouldn’t think twice about it. I could come in and find my husband and best friend in the same bed and I wouldn’t think twice.

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Check how long the call was

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Anything some in the dark comes to the light. Be observing of their actions and words. Don’t assume until there is evidence/proof and facts

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sounds like bestfriend is telling the truth and he was trying to hide it to surprise you

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Maybe she cheated on binning he past and she’s always gonna be sus now cause she did it. One sided sorry.

I think theyre both lying. Obviously he is bc he didnt butt dial her, she would have said that as well. As well as he coukd have said why if that was the truth. And she lying bc thats a terrible excuse. He wouldnt have lied to begin with if thats all it was

If it’s close to your birthday, he probably said he butt dialed your friend because he didn’t want you to know whatever he’s planning on doing/buying for you. You know your husband and you know your friend, so if you are having doubts ………….

I would definitely not put the red flag down yet. Keep an eye on that. I have had this betrayal before and if your gut is telling you something is wrong your are probably correct. Sounds super fishy I would definitely keep options in mind if you have to leave the relationships. It’s super hard because you lose two of the best people in your life but it will totally make you stronger. Hope and pray this is not the case but it definitely feels off to me.

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Watch em!!! So called friends are shadey af!

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You have a best friend you can’t trust with your husband?why then did you give him her line?

Maybe they’re planning a surprise for you!!

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See how long the call was for

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Oh they lying an sexin unfortunately what it sounds like why lie an be shady AF if not

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Easy to answer:
Has he shown other signs of cheating?
Then maybe.
Is your birthday soon?
Yes? Then that’s reasonable.
If no, then they’re lying.

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My husband talked to my bestfriend on the phone the other night, if you can’t trust either of them maybe you need a new friend & husband

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It could be about your birthday and he lied bc he dont want you to know that he asked about it

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My husband talked to my bestfriend on the phone the other night, if you can’t trust either of them maybe you need a new friend & husband

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It sounds like they are planning a surprise. I am kind of concerned with why you don’t trust them? Have they lied before?

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Check the phone records

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My s/o hid his phone from me & specifically said you’re not aloud in my phone… our call logs on our bill showed contacted my best friend for a month. I never thought anything of it because I knew Christmas was around the corner & he needed help on gifts plus, she’s my best friend! He ended up proposing which was the big secret.

If you trust your man, & your best friend is truly your best friend, don’t let it worry you. If it comes out later they were unfaithful to you, that’s on them not on you. Let the trash take itself out.

When is your birthday? Play it cool until then and if he doesn’t get you something good then they both lying. They just may be planning a surprise for you. Just keep your eyes open in the mean time.

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If your birthday is coming up and you have been friends with said best friend for longer than you have known and been with your husband it’s understandable that he called and asked for advice especially if he’s at a loss himself :woman_shrugging:t3: don’t just go straight to jumping to conclusions until you have more proof

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You can view unbilled/billed usage through your online mobile account. See how often they’ve talked, and then you can call them both out on lying.

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When’s your birthday?

See if the call was how long. But he could just not want you to see what he’s surprising you with. If they’ve both been trustworthy I wouldn’t jump to conclusions.

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I loved when my bff and husband were friends

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Same thing happened to me 2 weeks after I got out of the psych ward I found out the whole time I was in there they were sleeping together.

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2 different stories equals a lie

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Here for the birthday wishes

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Who ever did the butt dialing is lying

Is your birthday coming up ? If not , That’s weird …

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Playing devils advocate maybe it’s a surprise for you? If your birthday isn’t near than may be questionable

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My Friends all Hoes. Smart but Hoes. Not surprised.

She’s not your best friend !! Especially if she hasn’t told you !!

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One he could be planning a surprise and lied she didn’t know and told you the truth
Or they’re both lying and are actually cheating on you
I don’t know it could go both ways
Get the phone bill and see who’s been calling who and for how long that will clear up this

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Maybe it’s true… and he didn’t want to tell you (embarrassed)he was asking her for present advice??

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Or your husband is trying to surprise you for your birthday. Wait until after then before you jump to conclusions.

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Sounds like you need to let the trash take itself out. Kick em both to the curb.

He is lying IF it’s for a surprise for your birthday

If he won’t let you touch his phone here’s your sign :sweat_smile:

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If he is tryna get you something for your birthday than you’re just ruining the surprise… It doesn’t sound suspicious unless your birthday is really far away :woman_shrugging:t3:

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If your birthday is coming up, wait till it passes. If there is no surprise party or nothing that makes sense with the phone calls, bring it up to him.

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My naive side: he may have lied because he didn’t want you to know he was trying to surprise you and the friend told the truth because she didn’t want you to think what you obviously thought when you asked her about it.
My brain says: your mom would’ve known what to get you and he wouldn’t have had to hide his phone.

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How long was the conversation? When is your birthday? Do you trust your best friend and boyfriend? I mean it could be really what your best friend said, or it could be something really fucked up going on. Go with your gut!

I think we all need to know when your birthday is? We need and update, is it soon?

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I could totally see that bc my husband and best friend would be in cahoots like that and I think that’s adorable, but 1. My husband would also not refrain from letting me see his call log if I had asked… and 2. It’s aweful suspect that he wouldn’t let you see it bc its not like you could find out what they talked about by seeing how long they talked or how many times. Can you pull the phone records? Will your best friend let you see the call log on her end? Something fishy for sure.

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Nah !!! Tell her how it is plain and simple both off them !!! If that was me I don’t care if it was for my bday I will let both of them know I find it funny and if I find more to the story is on period

This definitely brings back bad memories. My ex was secretly texting and calling my SISTER IN LAW. He claimed it was to talk to my brother or it was nothing and she made light of it acting like he was just drunk or meant to call my brother … turns out my intuition was right. They were talking on the phone behind both mine and my brothers back for weeks. They met up for lunch and he kissed her! I only found out because he was being secretive with his phone and he was never like that before then I started noticing how when she was around he’d always find a way to be next to her or follow her…they were just always joking together. Long story short…. She said she liked his attention and was going thru a lot while my brother was depressed and on meds. She said she didn’t have feelings for him and didn’t intend for all that to happen… but he did have feelings for her. This is why till this day I will never trust a man being best friends or too close to another woman. :persevere:

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Both of them Sis! I would not say nothing & wait this out. Once your birthday comes then you will know!

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He may be trying to do something special for your birthday. She might be telling you the truth and he might be tryin to keep it a surprise. Now if your birthday comes and nothing special happens, well… Then you know what’s up

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  1. It could be completely genuine and if you go on his phone you may find out the present

  2. Could all be lies but have you had concerns before?

She’s your best mate would she do that?

Ask why he didn’t ask your mum for advice instead ?

Look at web history see if they have been searching for your present

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Depends on how many times they have rung each other more than once is red flags maybe they are doing something special for you it could go both ways

When is your birthday ? Maybe they are planning a surprise party ?? :expressionless:

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If my husband didn’t want me to use his phone I would have to know why. My husband gave me his computer password and phone password. He could use mine anytime also. Nothing to hide.

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Don’t let your paranoia ruin a surprise, let it go… It seems reasonable to ask your best friend what you’d like.

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If youre that suspicious and bent out of shape Over your husband and frienf having a conversation maybe you shouldn’t be married.
Especially if theres some logical reason like a bday coming up but even without that.
I couldnt imagine getting bent out of shape and making a huuuuuge scene over a number appearing in a call log once.without txt threads or call logs of multiple long convos.

I mean they probably are f£cking coz people are scum… but still.

This sounds legit to me.
Husband was trying to keep your birthday present a surprise.
Friend was trying to ease your mind.

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Toss his lying cheating ass out n be done with her too.

Sounds like you don’t trust either one of them.

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