I found out my husband has a secret phone...advice?

I found out my husband has a secret phone that I did not know about…he claims it is a work phone that he “doesn’t use” but a call came through from some random womans name and I went to answer it but she hung up…I tried getting into the phone but its locked and I do not know the code…does it seem strange to anyone else that a “work phone” has a lock?

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Keeping it a secrete is the problem. When you have a work phone you typically carry it OR you have is somewhere easy accessible for when someone calls. Not hiding it. That does not make any sense.

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Take the sim out and wait x

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Yes. You need to have a serious conversation

You already know the answer it’s clear as dayc

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Buy husband is my thought… Definitely ant a work phone

My husband has a work phone as well, and it has a lock on it. So that’s not weird… But it is weird that the lady hung up on you. Have you asked him about it?

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Girl!! SORRY but he f’ing around! Either physically or emotionally.
YOU REMEMBER!! YOU Have the power!
You can do several things, depending on your own feelings, love him enough to actually work on it? Is he worth it? When you sit back and look at your life and goals, 40/50 yrs down the road. Is THIS the man you you want to be sitting on the porch with and ACTUALLY enjoying being with him?
Use that as your gauge…
If you can’t see that, then cut your losses now!
May be hard to do, but you WILL feel better soon!
Love and Light to You!
:heart::candle:

He’s cheating - drop it and start getting your affairs in order. Find a good attorney and have him served when you’re ready.

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If it was a work phone, he’d have told you about it.

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All work phones I have had/know people had always had a lock. But kind of sus about the call, unless the ‘coworker’ was expecting a man to answer not a woman, since it’s a “work” phone and may have gotten the wrong number. Ask him for the pin and go from there.

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My bf has a work phone and it has a lock on it. His personal phone also has a lock on it. My phone also has a lock on it. We respect each other’s privacy but if either of us felt the need to go through each other’s phones then we’d ask. Also I would never answer either of his phones unless he asked me and vice versa. However, the only concerning part is that he claims it’s a work phone but then why haven’t you ever seen it or known about it. If it is truly a work phone and giving the benefit of doubt, maybe when you answered the lady thought she called the wrong number and just hung up. I would talk to him and ask him questions like when did he get a work phone and why did he never tell you about it and then go from there. If he’s cheating you’ll hopefully be able to figure it out and then it’s up to you whether or not your relationship is worth fighting for. Don’t jump the gun, cool down first then follow your gut.

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Tell him open the phone and then leave him

Having a work phone is not unusual. Having it locked is not strange at all. Is it strange he didn’t mention it …maybe he didn’t think it was anything to bother about since it was for work and you wouldn’t be using it.
Depends on the type of relationship you have i suppose. How much you trust him
If you trust him…you accept his explanation and move on
If you don’t trust him…you leave

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Work phone being locked isn’t weird, a lot of places require that for the obvious. The rest is weird.

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What does he do for a living? It’s not that far fetched. I mean if his job requires him to be on call they may have a dedicated phone for that they circulate between call rotation, or if he is a manager.

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A secret phone is because of a secret life.

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Most work phones would likely be password protected, does a work phone fit his job? I’m not saying it is, but it was a plausible story until the woman hung up

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This is how my father concealed his affair with another woman for over a year until my mom finally found it…20 year marriage down the drain.

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Uh no. Thats divorce. My husband has a work phone and it’s locked but it’s a work phone and it’s never been hidden or secret or strange phone calls come through. 

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The only thing NOT weird is the locked work phone.

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You already know… trust your gut

If it’s supposed to be secure for work, it would have a lock. My husband has a secure work phone. Mostly it stays in his backpack though. Same with the laptop.

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Work phone should be locked.

A secret and locked phone is always open to a lot of questions!

Yep. Sounds like a cheater

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If he is not in a job that needs the phone locked for security reasons then tell him you want him to unlock and shown to you . If he says no then you have reason to be concerned.

I don’t think it’s weird that a work phone has a lock. If anything that’s more reason for a phone to have a lock :woman_shrugging:t3:

However I find it weird you didn’t know

You’ll figure it out eventually. I had it in the 5th second

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I have a work cell that has tons of security features. No one else can even answer it. Just ask him about it.

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My husband had 2 phones. I was completely aware of the both personal and the work phone. Having a secret phone says he is up to no good. I never, ever say this but, get out now. He is definitely cheating. If he will go to those lengths to cheat, he is already gone. No point keeping him around, regardless of what he says, he will do it again
Cut your losses, and get a good lawyer.

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Don’t kid yourself. You know what this is.

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Why did you answer “his” work phone in the first place?

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Simply communicate with him about it!? Ask questions, you have a right to your feeling and there not invalid! If you feel it’s off then 9 times outta 10 it is! Trust your gut! Anything in a relationship shouldn’t be hidden or kept from their spouse! I guarantee if the roles were reversed he would feel the same way you do and have a problem with it! I’m sorry your going through this and hope you find the answers your looking for before it to late! Life is to short for bull crap!

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It could be a work phone that is locked. Or, it could be his fun phone. If it’s legitimate have a courageous conversation and ask him for phone, the code and check things out for yourself. Cheating or not, he needs to prove this to you.

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You know what this means. Your sharing him. If you don’t want to share, you need to walk away. The other woman doesnt mind.

Interesting that plain old logic cant trump the desire to save your emotional loyalty, if it were work related she wouldnt hang up, her name likely wouldnt show up from the pre-saved, and it wouldnt have been a secret phone you were unaware of for however long he’s had it, its an extreme longshot that he’s being honest

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My husband has a phone but he told me the code and leaves it home most the time .

Idk. If i had a work phone, it wouldn’t of been hid. Like even if i somehow didnt mention it, it would of been laying out somewhere. What does he do? Why would he need a work phone. Also very suspicious that she hung up right away. If hes messing around, she clearly knows shes the other woman. Something doesn’t sound right. I’m so sru

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Once the trust is gone ITS OVER

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Take out the sim. If it doesn’t fit in your phone. Go buy a cheap burner that it will fit in. Exchange sims. So he has the blank sim so he doesn’t think anything of it.

You’ll have all of your answers soon enough.

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I found one in the car once it had numerous numbers and messages and condoms hidden in another part, you don’t need a bigger red flag then that I’d be done.

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I saw a show where a guy had a secret phone, no one knew about it until he died. Turns out he was a secret agent. But… o I doubt thats true with your husband. I am sorry if you didn’t know your husband has a work phone because he never told you ,he didn’t want you to know he had another phone. I would make a fuss about it and make sure you get your answers. Best of luck in finding and excepting the truth.

Having a designated work phone is fine. Having it locked it fine. What’s weird is you not knowing about it before this…that’s sketch AF tbh

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It’s not strange that a work phone has a lock, usually employers require a work phone to have a passcode on it because of the company specific/possibly sensitive information that could be a work phone.

It is strange if he suddenly has a work phone and that someone calling his work phone would hang up when you answer.

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Really depends on the kind of work he does. Did he change jobs or title recently to make a work phone now a requirement. A lot of jobs that require work phones, consider work phones company property and as such are subject to company privacy rules. Meaning he wouldn’t be allowed to show you what’s on the phone even if he wanted to. But if he’s had no changes in his job, then it’s likely he’s cheating.

Better get those Divorce papers ready. Dude is cheating

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Time u get a secret attorney

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Girl you already know what’s happening .

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I find it odd that you think it’s weird that there is a code on it. Isn’t more odd that even even has a second you did not no about

It’s not really that weird. My boyfriend had a work phone with a code on it. However he told me his passcode.

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Yeah right. If he had a work phone she would know about it. This is crazy. He’s cheating. That’s his side chick. She knows the drill. Hang up if my wife answers.

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My husband’s work phone has a lock and I’m sure if someone from work was looking for him and heard me they would hang up thinking it was the wrong number.
I’d stay away from his work phone so you don’t get him in trouble but also maybe address why you’re insecure about it with him. Maybe he can make you feel more secure.

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It doesn’t seem suspicious that a work phone has a lock but it is very suspicious that there is a secret phone you didn’t know about and the first time finding out about it a woman was calling and hung up. Red flags everywhere

I don’t think it’s suspicious at all… my husband has his work phone locked also. I never answer it because it’s not my job. Lol!

As far as the woman that called… it may have been work related and she was trying to reach your husband but when she heard a woman’s voice thought she dialed the wrong number. If it’s work related, I Don’t see the big deal. Depending on his work and level of security/lack there of would depend on if he should let you see the number or give you access into the phone.

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Take the SIM out and put in your phone.

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Married for how long and didn’t know he had a work phone?

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My work phone had a lock on it. It came that way-my husband knows the code though.

Heeeell no, that’s suspicious af. Work phone needing a password, absolutely logical. A woman calling & hanging up on a “work phone”, you not knowing about a “work phone”, and him not forking over the password, all red flags.
Follow your gut, usually it’s right.

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I have a work phone that has a lock.

A locked work phone is not suspicious. Receiving a call on a work phone, from a saved number, that hangs up when you answer is suspicious. It’s simple tell him to tell you the code or password to unlock it, or whatever. If he refuses, you have your answer. It’s not like you randomly decided you want to go through his phone, it’s a secret phone with suspicious activity. There’s no excuse he can give that would make any sense.

Divorce attorney. That is all.

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My husband has 2 phones
Personal and Work
But I’ve always known he has 2
It’s called a secret phone for a read

Pay off as much as you can… save some secret money…get your things in order
And call it quits… sadly that gut feeling you have to write on this page is for a reason and you know the answer.
Lot’s of us have been there.
It will all work out at the end for you :pray:t2::two_hearts:

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Leave stuff alone quit meddo

Not strange that the work phone has a lock as it protects Client Privacy and Confidentiality however, it’s wrong that he didn’t tell you about it and talk to you about it.

Trust issues are the main cause of conflict between people. It takes time to earn trust. It takes 1 second to take it away. Have trust in yourself to know that no matter what goes down…you’ll be ok. Life’s short. Don’t waste it with drama.

If work called him then the woman would have not hung up. The woman would have asked to speak to him if they had something to ask him. Why else would they call ? My guess is it wasn’t a work call. Big huge red flag !!!

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From someone who used to work in corporate, work phones required locks for security.

However this sounds fishy… what’s his job? How long has he been there? Why just now for a work phone?

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Ma’am please tell us you are not that naive. He is 10000000% cheating. Work phones will usually always have a passcode but there is zero reason for you to have not known about it or for her to have hung up.

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Swap that Sim or hook it up to ur laptop :sweat_smile::joy:

I would have taken a photo of the phone number on the screen. Or do it the next time it rings. And then use enough phone to call her.

Yeah, that happened to me about 14 years ago. We got divorced.

You already know the answer. I’m
Sorry.

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Its not a work phone, its his secret cheating phone

Ask him for the code to unlock it, if he has nothing to hide he should have no problem giving it to you if he refuses then you know…

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The red flags are waving right in your face. You know the answer to your questions so what are you going to do about it?

Mine has a work phone.
Ask him to show you the work content

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Cheating or dealing drugs. Either way, hiding something from you.

My ex did this. He used his work phone to call me without his girlfriend(now wife) without her knowing.

I’m sorry but one him keeping it a secret till you found it is a red flag to me . For two some woman calling and hanging up when she heard a women’s voice to me is also a red flag . If its just a work phone why coudint he have told you about it ? If that was my husband there’s no way I could let that go but he’s not he’s your husband so you have to decide what to do about the situation but to me it all sounds extremely sketchy . I’m so sorry you are going through this I really am but you deserve answers if he has nothing to hide tell him to give you the code for the phone so you can have some clarification that it’s just a work related phone .

This reminds me of the criminal minds episodes with the serial killer that had a family but had an entire secret life :sweat_smile:

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“Does it seem strange?” :rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl:

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Call me crazy but that’s weird to me. Why wouldn’t you know about a work phone? And if it was a work call then the woman should’ve told you she needed to talk to him about work instead of hanging up. I’d be livid but maybe that’s just me :woman_shrugging:

When I had to work phone it had to have a screen lock on it. But also when I got my work phone, I told my partner. :wink: secrets don’t make for a good relationship :shushing_face:

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You get that phone and smash the he!! out of it, then you throw all of his crap out, call an attorney then your best friend. Then you pick up the pieces of your life gracefully and rebuild one day at a time until you wake up one day and have to pinch yourself to see if the life you now live is even real bc it’s everything you dreamt and worked hard for.

You already know what is going on. You aren’t ready to accept it for what it is so you came to social media to have your fears confirmed.
My advice: if there’s a lot at stake hire a private investigator to get you proof of his adultery. If y’all don’t own any property or have money then file for a divorce before he does.

Piss him off…

It’s not the lie that matters…its why were you not worth the truth…!?

You can’t seriously asking this question…?

there’s only ONE explanation for this. And it’s not a work phone.

Ask for the lock code if he says no you know things are about to hit the fan!

He’s cheating. Divorce. That’s all imma say :confused: if she hung up, she knows .

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It’s weird to me. Even if it’s for work he could be like hey I have been given a phone for work purposes

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Is he a secret agent or something?

Don’t be dumb. That’s the phone he uses to talk to his affair partner. At least, that’s what mine did…

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It’s call side chick phone and she already knows the drill if a female answers it
its not my sister hang up Lmao

It’s not the only thing he has secret.

I don’t think it’s strange that a work phone has a lock. My brother’s work phone has a lock on it. I do find it strange it’s been kept a secret and that whoever called it (man or woman) would hang up instead of trying to continue getting in contact with your husband if it’s work related. If it was truly a “work phone” it wouldn’t be hidden even if there was a lock… just my opinion.

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I would ask him for the code it would be pretty obvious from looking if it was for work and if he refuses it’s obvious what’s going on

My husband had to install security to his phone. For work. He gave me the code when I asked. Go with your gut it’s usually right.

Run now, it’s definitely not a work phone, its definitely used for cheating!

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