.I want to know how you would feel if you found your significant another recording you. Today as I was cleaning my home, I found my husband’s old phone, and it has recent and lots of voice recordings of me from a while back? I don’t know how even to address this or what even to think i just feel betrayed as if he didn’t trust me or something. I’m just so lost and hurt right now …I just need some advice
Anything or time specific?? Very bizarre!
Have you or him threatened divorce and custody regarding kids? Alot of men are now doing this especially if you answer in a way he can prove you emotionally and verbally abused him etc.
Lol my fiance did this to me when i first met him i was so shocked i thought he was a weirdo but he was insecure bc hisbpast relationships.
What are the recordings of? If you are verbally or emotionally abusive he might want that as a fall back in the event that you guys split. That’s really the only thing I can think of as to why he would be recording you, especially seeing as it was on a phone, so he would be there while the recordings were taking place.
That’s an extreme invasion of privacy! I would be mad.
Maybe he thinks your cheating… or having certain people over… That’s creepy tbh.
If they aren’t anything that could be incriminating at some point, instead of jumping to your own conclusions that it is bad, just ask him. Maybe he just likes the sound of your voice.
Clearly you dont trust him either if you were snooping threw an old phone
I have some random recordings of my husband and when he’s away I listen to him cause I miss him lol . His voice is so sweet to me .
There’s a reason to everything
And unless you say what the recordings are of I will not give my advise . Sorry
I would throw the phone away. What phone dear
What were they of? That’ll prob tell you what you need to know
I hope you deleted them. I know I would.
It depends on what it is about. The only thing my husband has ever recorded is me snoring because I swore up and down I dont snore.
The only time i think would be appropriate ti delete them, is if he did. Or if you are just talking or talking to a friend that in no way is intimate with you or you with them. But if its of you cheating, flirting, being abusive or manipulative. Dont. That just makes you look worse.
Just ask him and work it put
My ex did this many times. Pissed me off every time. I would find his Bluetooth device you used and throw it away. He always denied listening to me, but I wasn’t stupid. He was on drugs and paranoid I was cheating. Even claimed 1 recording contained a man’s voice, I was alone. Needless to say, he’s now my ex, for that and so many other reasons.
Or if he thinks you won’t remember saying something. I can see that happenign
What are the recordings of?..
anything that he can use against you…?
or does he just like tbe sound of your voice?
Also, i think you both need counseling if you guys dont trust each other. And its clear you guys dont. He recorded you and your snoooing thru an old phone of his.
It cannot be used in court at all unless you knew at the time you were being recorded and it was verbally on the recording. So if it’s in a negative nature it can’t be used. Also I would be pissed. My ex husband did this to me trying to gain custody of my kids but he was an addict and not in a sound frame of mind. Needless to say it’s been 3 years and he still doesn’t have custody
I’d record him a new one letting him know you found them if they were bad I’d delete them And still leave him a message
He did not have your permission …big no no…never the less talk to a lawyer…hold on to the recordings do not give them back dont let him know you have his phone and for now own watch what u say to him and wait for your lawyers responce…I would leave him …big red flag
I guess it depends what the recordings are of. I record my husband sleeping to prove he snores or record him playing with our puppy so I could look back at them. Or record him singing cause he has a lovely singing voice. He doesn’t like me recording or taking pictures of him at all but I promise not to show anyone and they are just for my eyes only.
is it where his phone recorded your calls or??? not really enough info to form a real opinion … as of right now I don’t see an issue
Are we married to the same man because girl same! My husband bought a hidden camera and placed it inside a clock on our tv and spied on me. There was another USB port with a camera inside it that I found in his email, but somehow he doesn’t know where it went. I used to get dressed in my closet because I was afraid to dress anywhere else. It’s extremely violating and creepy to say the least. His excuse, “I wanted to watch you fondle yourself because you won’t do it in front of me.” Which is creepy as hell all in itself.
Voice recordings of what? Not enough info to give an opinion at all.
Not right if you haven’t agreed to it
This was a lifetime movie. Run!
What did he record? This is so vague, it is hard to say. Did he record you botching at him?
I would delete them and confront him
Well are you verbally abusive towards him? Cause if you are then I’d definitely do the samething lol. Or what have you done to him for him not to trust you? You should’ve explained what the recordings were
My husband did it once but I was being completely honest with him either. That didn’t justify it to me though and I told him I would divorce him if it ever happened again. We fixed our marriage but I still will and he knows it.
It depends he may have been recording them so if any thing happens to u he could still hear ur voice.
I mean women record their men to get prof of their abuse are you abusive???
I mean if women can do it
Why can’t men do it to prof???
Were u talking in youre sleep
I would be pissed, that’s an invasion to your privacy!
I’d delete them and continue on my day. Is he really going to ask about them and then have to explain himself. I’d probably leave as well.
Depending on state rather it was legal or not. Some states only one a 1 party needs to know for recordings.
But yes need more info. Did u cheat before, is he absuive, just the 2 of ull talking about normal life stuff, I mean what was in the recording depends. And if I’ll haven’t been faithful to each other trust is a huge issue
Recording someone seems odd to me… especially if you have done nothing wrong. If you’re abusing him then that’s different but just to record you
Just delete them. He’ll find out sooner or later
I would feel very betrayed! Was it recordings to use against you or something? I’m kind of confused If so then yes I would be mad, betrayed, angry… I would ask him why he was recording me. If you found those then you may find more in his phone now too. To me it’s a little creepy…
What were you doing in the recording that the recording makes you uncomfortable? It seems weird that you saying random things in a recording. would bother you
No one should be recording you without your consent especially your partner
You know my dad died 2 yrs ago and I’d love the chance to hear his voice again.
More info is definately needed here. I mean if u were just talking about random stuff who cares. If he recorded you cheating he gets to be pissed off. More context is needed
Sounds like you are either abusive or cheating and he felt he needed proof of it. No context.
If it’s not bad maybe he likes hearing your voice when you’re gone
Erm why? That sounds really cute tbh unless it’s like private, as in you were in the bathroom or the car where he wasn’t and he recorded you.
Maybe don’t jump the gun on feeling hurt over something harmless.
My soon to b ex does this a lot with his now gf and has the whole time they’ve been together… 3 yrs now…any time she leaves the house he will put something to record in the vehicle and whenever he left for work he’d have stuff recirdjjf in different rooms. He turned crazy after they started messing around and got together
You’re not telling what they were recordings of… you talking? Yelling?
Why would you be hurt or feeling betrayed if you haven’t even bothered to ask about it like an adult? 🤦🤷 Maybe he just likes to listen to your voice, or has trouble remembering things. Damn people always jump to conclusions
Have to have more info
Also why did you feel the need to snoop in his phone anyway?
That’s not normal behavior maybe put him out your house
Whats he recording you for and of what
Id be upset. He should trust you. And shouldne be with you if he can’t. Id erase them and see if he says anything. He is just being very insecure to which is a pet peeve for me
He’s unhappy and planning his escape… at the end I recorded my husband of 26 years… it was when I knew he was lying & cheating and I was planning my escape…
Voice recordings of ur voicemail?
Of u just talking in the house while hes not there or while hes there?
What are u talking bout?
My fiance’ records me snoring or lil clips of random stuff😂 it’s no biggie if u have nothing to hide
But if hes a control freak🤔
Maybe he has hidden cameras so he no longer has to record u with his phone
Maybe hes recording u so that he can get dirt on u to divorce u cuz ur abusive or cheating🤷♀️
If u have to record someone its obviously not a good relationship
Um. You aren’t giving any context or information on what was in them. So how can we give feedback?
You’re allowed to feel any way you’d like. I personally find it weird. Just sit down with him and ask him about it.
If my husband did this, I would laugh. If it’s from when he’s at work, he’d hear me bitching about having to get up, or how no one else can vacuum or something lol. There’s not enough info given to justify being upset about it.
Need more information. What did he record? Are yall fussing? You being unfaithful? Something made him do it.
Don’t give it back to him.
Yea I think maybe talk to him because you obviously don’t have the whole story nor do we
Experienced that. Very painful
Ya it seems like he’s setting something up for future. Either way I’d confront him on it. Record it in front of him.
When you do confront him (because hey maybe there Is a good reason like he misses your voice) make sure you address the lack of trust and the feeling of him actively working towards an end to your relationship
Can’t give advice, as there is more to this story…
I’d occasionally find these in my exes old phones. Turned out he was a super creep and had video recordings and hidden cameras posted up all over my room and other areas of the house. Hundreds of recordings. I was only able to view about 8 of them. 2 I was fully nude. I’m not saying this is the same scenario you are dealing with but audio recordings were the first thing I found. I’d especially be wary if he is the type to make false accusations.
He’s trying to remember what you said so he doesn’t get in trouble for not listening to you,my girlfriend sounds like Charlie Browns teacher,blah ba blah blah blah
He wants to rmind himself that you also work hard. Thank him for the compliment.
Depends on what was on the recordings.
My friends husband did this. We found recorders in her purse, different places thru out the house… we even found a tracker under the hoodvof her car. He worked midnights so he would take the ones there to work and listen… he had several to change out while listening
Doesn’t specify what the recordings are. how can anyone give advice on this lol.
Recording you talking about what ?
Uhhhh be like … wtf?
Ok recordings of what your really not going to get any good advice unless you specify
You want feedback on something with absolutely no context or information regarding the recordings whatsoever? How are we supposed to do that?
None of us can give you advice. There is not enough details. It really depends on what he was recording.
So you’re snooping through an old phone of his without permission and he’s recording you without permission?
Something is obviously going on in your relationship for both parties to be doing stuff behind each other’s back.
You all need to see a marriage counselor.
I have recorded my man when he used to drink and fight with me.
He has since learned so much about emotional intelligence and what is or isn’t abusive. He still is learning but those recordings remind us both how far we have come.
I’m with everyone else.
Like are the recordings you two arguing? Are they just of you talking? Sexual?
Really depends on why. I’m gonna be positive and say he misses your voice but might be too macho/shy to tell you.
maybe he wants them in case something happens to you! i would give anything to have a recording of my dad’s last vm to me!! i lost it when I switched providers
I will offer a counter point: depending on content maybe he wants to remember these things said a certain way so he doesn’t want to forget or maybe if he’s faced a lot of death lately he wants to save it for other reasons. Might not always be malicious. Unless it’s argumentative stuff. Then I’d be hurt about their reasoning.
We need more info. If he’s like putting recording devices around the house specifically to spy on you, that’s a crime.
Depends on what he was recording but my petty ass would erase all recordings and wait for him to say something and act surprised
Start talking about it when you’re home alone. Let him listen on the recording that YOU know what he’s doing and he’s not that slick
Beating dead horse here but there is really no way to give any useful advice without more info.
I recorded my ex several times without his knowledge. He would go off on these mental breakdowns and I’d record him to play for the police later if anything ever happened. The recordings were also played to his therapist because he refused to speak and pretended like nothing was wrong. Ultimately, the recordings were for my peace of mind and safety if he ever did anything. Shortly after I started feeling the need to record him, we split and I divorced him.
My ex used to record me when we were fighting. Like, the only time I ever yelled at him he had to record it to show everyone how psychotic I was apparently It was manipulative and gross.
But your post is so unclear so I cant offer advice lol
It doesnt matter what he recorded. Its against the law to record someone without consent. He clearly doesnt trust you and is searching for proof…
This story hits real close to home for me. He probably thinks youre cheating.
Delete them all and say nothing.
Frankly more information is needed, what are the recordings of? Is it just random everyday conversations or does it seem like he is trying to catch you cheating? If it is just random everyday conversations has he had a lot of people he has loved pass away? Could he be just trying to save your voice for a day he fears will come when you are dead? There could be many reasons I suggest talking to him about it but don’t use angry words or tone of voice you have to ask him why he is doing it and if it is because he does not trust you either he is cheating or has been cheated on in the past.
I mean all u can do right now is ask him why?
I mean what were the recordings about?
So my advise would depend on the content of the recordings. Is he recording arguments that you and he had? Is he recording conversations between you and him? Is he setting it up to record old phone calls you guys had? (Theres an app that used to automatically record every single call, he may have downloaded for a reason other than you but then couldn’t bring himself to delete them) is he recording just you alone when he is not home? There are so many variables. Here in arizona it is not illegal to record someone without their knowledge on a phone call, because only one of the 2 people of the conversation need to know that the recording is happening. So for example, I could record all of my phone calls and never tell anyone else I am recording, and it’s perfectly legal because I am aware of the recording.
I’ve often considered recording my husband just incase he passes, so I still have his voice.
I’ll just be straight up? Where has argueing at the time?
Its a tool. Were you acting what he thought was irratinal. Maybe he was going to show you later so you could discuss it with you when you were calmer.
Hmmm lol. Need more detail