A couple nights ago i got drunk texts from my husbands ex wife about how I am gross and he downgraded when he met me and our future kids will not be cute either…it hurt but i dont feed into drama so i let it go…come to find out the next day i went to my in laws and my sister in law (who i love) told me my husbands ex was over here and she was drunk WITH my mother in law and my MIL may have played a hand in these texts/…i feel hurt…and betrayed and now feel uncomfrtable…what do i do?
Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. I got drunk texts from my husbands ex and my mother-in-law
You deserve an apology. Stay away from them
Oh f that. Everyone would be cut off.
You married your husband not your mil cut her off
What does the husband say
Let it go. If your husband and you are happy it doesn’t matter what anyone else says.
Maybe sit down and have a talk about y’all relationship but don’t bring up the mean words of someone else.
People like that have nothing better in their own life then to bring down the people they feel insecure about. Get drunk and confront the mother in law and your husband. Slap some
I would never go around his mother or her home ever again.
When someone shows you who they really are……
And if your husband doesn’t stand tall with you against both his mom and ex wife then you need to reevaluate the marriage before kids.
Confront your mother in law. If you allow her to behave poorly and treat you bad now she will continue until you put your foot down.
Sounds like your husband needs to talk to his mom.
Speak with the mother. Tell her that it is unacceptable and hold to the boundaries, if you don’t have any with them, set some healthy ones. For example, it is unacceptable to send nasty messages.
Id talk to your husband about it and have him talk to his mom regarding boundaries within your guys relationship. If MIL is wanting to keep a friendship with Ex wife, you are to be left alone and out of it and respected as your husbands wife. I hope he sticks up for you.
Jealous haters. Just continue to be happy with your husband and it will eat at their souls.
Ignore it and limit contact. Be sure your husband knows, and show him the texts. Let him handle HIS family, you handle yours. If he doesn’t do anything about it…red flag!
There are so many boundaries crossed here… I don’t know where to start…I would try to found out if the ex was with your MIL before accusations happen… but if she WAS then lines must be drawn. You are the wife. If she won’t get in line then she doesn’t need to be in your lives
This is easy. Pu*ch her in the fkknngg mouth…
I’d have your husband say something to the both of them!
Laugh and ignore them u r better than that
May have played a part?
Who cares. Ignore them both. Don’t play their game, and don’t get into drama. Just like growing up, they want to act like children and cause drama let them, on their own. I wouldn’t think twice about this. You just know how childish they are now.
What’s your husband think of this stuff??
Limited contact. You don’t owe mil anything.
Talk with ur husband. U two are a team. Don’t let me MIL or the ex to get between u and ur husband. She’s obviously trying to gain his family as troop members. Playing the pitty party. That’s so bogus of ur MIL but some tend to be that way. I’d really sit down with ur man and explain to him ur feelings. Maybe h guys could even talk to ur MIL but I’d advise that it could turn worse if u don’t watch how u set the tone of the convo. Have h ever had a situation with ur husband and ex directly! Or is she just groveling for attention at this point!
I’d expect an apology and then I’d cut the b*tch off. Eff that childish bs.
Let your husband deal with it he needs to step in and stop it now, She is winning by your response, she is jealous remember that and he is with you
You confront her!!!
I would confront her. Especially if you plan on being in that family. #1 rule to any relationship is communication even with an in-law. Stand your ground now.
Your husband needs to address this
Ignore that. These people are trying to goad u into some bs drama. You are clearly above this level of stupidity…just ignore it. Childish games are literally beneath you.
Address it. Have a conversation about it. And then move on. If you don’t, she will continue to disrespect you.
Like someone else said above, you married your husband not your mother in law. Unfortunately not all of us get good ones BUT at the end of the day your husbands opinion is the only one that is relevant Don’t be scared to cut her off either especially if she’s toxic, which it sounds like it considering what you said.
Your husband needs to have words with them both.
Id confront the MIL then not trust her for a while and let your husband deal with her. As for the ex - don’t even lower yourself to her. It will eat at her jealous, sad little soul that you’re unbothered by her problems. <3
But seriously, you need to talk to your husband and her both.
You don’t do anything. Your husband should have a conversation with his mother about how inappropriate she is acting. He needs to have your back. And he needs to tell his ex to back off and you both need to block her
Stay away from her and tell your husband WHY!!!
Tell your husband to handle that ish girl tf
Yes I’d sit down and confront her and talk to her ! And than just let her know you will not disrespect me ever. If you have an issue with me or don’t like me let me know. And say I’ll stay away, gladly.
Sorry you are dealing with that
If your husband doesn’t back you then leave. Simple. You don’t need a toxic mother in law, your future kids don’t need a toxic grandmother, and their kids don’t need a toxic great grandmother. Stop the cycle before it even begins.
Cut them out of your life. If he’s great keep him. But make it clear you won’t take any disrespect from his family or ex.
Is confront her. That’s absolutely disgusting
This is so disrespectful of your MIL! And your husband definitely needs to step in and stand up for his wife! But I would def speak my piece also! May not be the appropriate thing but it would make me feel better🤷🏻♀️
What kind of mother would stoop as low as to degrade her own child’s spouse? And to have the audacity to speak on her own grandchildren that way? I wouldn’t even give her the opportunity to see how beautiful your future children will be! It sounds like he has a jealous ex, and not too much of a mother. You both (you and your husband) need to talk about this, and try to make a mutual decision to cut her off entirely. If she wants to ruin her sons relationship, she obviously doesn’t care about, nor does she seem to have respect for his feelings/opinions about his own life.
Your husband needs to stick up for you and confront both of them and me just being me I don’t tolerate these kinds of games I kindly tell people to F off and cut them out but that’s just me. I’m so sorry you’ve had to go through this it’s just not okay it’s so disrespectful on so many levels. I’m fine with the fact that not everyone is going to like me and I don’t like everyone but there’s no need to be childish like they were at all it’s so uncalled for
I have a mother in law just like this it’s sickening
Mil would hear it. His ex is nothing to be so keep talking jealous lady
I’d let my MIL know now that she’s not welcome around my future kids due to the disgusting and degrading comments she’s made. I’d let me husband know that too. I wouldn’t care at all about the ex wife, because she’s jealous, but the MIL crossed so many boundaries.
I say just don’t do anything now and then when she’s old enough, stick your MIL in a nursing home, never visit her and give her a real reason to hate you lol.
Tell your husband. You and he then sit down with them or call them and talk it over. Tell her that disrespect will not be tolerated. Say if it happens again then contact will be blocked.
Who cares what the ex thinks! Block her and move on! As of the MIL, that’s her problem if she feels that way… I would forgive her once! Read this out loud! Trust me … it helps🙌 hubby should address MIL tho…
Make sure your husband is aware of what’s going on and have him deal with it. Hopefully he defends you to his mother and the ex. If not think twice about moving forward with him it only gets worse .
I know for me my husband has never let anyone in his family offend me like that.
Your husband needs to address this. If you doesn’t want to, you know where you stand
Confront the MIL. Let her know regardless of how she feels about you, you are not going anywhere and it would be better for all parties involved if she would accept that. If she refuses to accept that, cut her off. She should t have access to your life just because you’re married to her son. And speaking of that, he needs to say something to both his mother and his ex wife. That is unacceptable, regardless if she was drunk or not. Let MIL know that if she continues this behavior, she will also not have access to your future kids as well. Blood is not thicker than water and you have the right to remove anyone from your life that upsets it. If you husband does not address this quickly, that should tell you all you need to know right there.
Your husband needs to defend you and your marriage to his mother. That’s not acceptable and is also disrespectful to him!!
Tell your MIL she better choose. If you do have kids and she wants anything to do with them she better quit. We have to stand our ground on this stuff yall. Set boundaries and don’t let them bully you. MIL needs to grow up and cut contact with the ex or deal with the consequences.
Ignore it dont feed into it confronting with no actual evidence won’t go well…just don’t go around her
If my MIL was hanging out with my husbands ex like that I’d cut her out of my life. She has no business hanging out with her. She should be loyal to you now. That whole situation is weird.
I would cut her out of my life!!!
If your relationship with your husband is good. I would honestly just feel sorry for them.
Have it out with MIL and text ex back to leave you alone or you’ll turn her in for harassment by electronic device, it’s a thing…
I would tell your husband what happened. I would confront the MIL together and let her know how it made you feel. I’d have your husband call his ex while you’re there, on speaker, and confront her about it together as well. I’m so sorry this happened to you. What a shitty thing to do.
Just cut contact with all of them
I’d go crazy and really give them a reason to not like me…
I’d be going off. Don’t put up with that, nip it in the bud.
hope ur SIL told ur hubby that
I would bring it up at the next family get to gether and ask what’s the crack is. He may of had kids with his ex which is why the mil still sees the ex and continue the relationship just to see her grand babies you just don’t know but the air definitely needs clearing
that sounds really messed up! Why was she hanging with the ex dil?? Do ur husband and the ex wife have children Together, asking Bc everyone’s saying mil shouldn’t be in touch with ex dil at all and that mil should be cut off if she talks to the ex. I don’t Agree that she should be there gossiping and u and her son’s marriage. That’s uncalled for. Confront her with ur husband in the same room
Walk away! not worth it at all, causes years of stress that’s not needed!
Talk to husband then give him the phone. He and she took different paths
Forget it… but don’t ever trust mil
Put them boundaries up, my love! You deserve to be respected and that most Certainly crosses a line. You have every right to feel the way you do.
Just ignore it. Don’t let things out of ur control, control you. If that makes any sense. If it happens again tho Confront the MIL. Forget the ex. She’s an ex for a reason.
You know it’s OK to cut people out of your life right!!! Like,toxic is toxic; in law or not bitch can get cut off!!!
Be a boss ass bitch and accept it and be better!!! Also boundaries!
Its considered harrassment.
I would do a police report and have YOUR HUSBAND deal with it his ex and mother. FIRM that there will not be a second time.
Don’t worry about them. You have what they want. Words hurt but you got this mamma. Jealousy is ugly.
I’d confront your MIL if you allow people to treat you that way it will continue.
You shine bright and don’t let them know that any of what they said bothered you. They are looking for a reaction and that is exactly what you don’t give them.
Talk to your husband, you BOTH need to address this situation because that is way out of hand and uncalled for. You need to set your boundaries and you need to do it now or it will only get worse. Show them you’re a force to be reckoned with… because I’ll be damned?! Tf?
Cut ties with mil and block both
I’d be asking her about it.
Talk to you husband and put some distance between you and you mil for awhile.
That is so gross I’d be making your husband sort it out and have words with the both of them bitter exs are horrible sometimes just think of it this way you have him not her she’s just jealous of you
I wouldn’t be staying
I think you should tell your husband about it & he should defend you by confronting his mother about it. He should not allow her to disrespect you like that.
I’d let it go this time, but I’d be extremely upset if she EVER goes there again.
Just carry on with your life and be the best wife ever to your husband
You don’t need your mother in law, as long as your husband loves you your good
I wanna know if they have kids together if they don’t why does his family still talk to her
Talk to your husband.
First of all talk to your husband and let him know what’s going on and that it’s caused you some emotional upset as it would anyone.
And then straight up ask your mother-in-law if she played a role in it, I’m just bold I want to know because if you’re a POS if you’re a snake I don’t want to be your friend you don’t have to be a part of my life just because you’re a part of my husband’s.
And if she gets defensive if she acts like maybe she played a role in it well then slap a wall up and sever that relationship real quick because nobody deserves that nonsense if you’re going to wear a mask and be fake when you’re around me just take it off and be who you are but just know that I don’t owe you any obligated respect.
Confront her about it. Stand up for yourself.
Guess those future kids don’t need that grandma.
With all due respect… You need to let those bitches know. Confront them both, the mother in law first. You are not to be treated that way.
You confront her honestly and also let your husband see the messages too and tell him he needs to deal with this
YOU STAND UP FOR YOURSELF‼️
& Let her know that WILL NOT EVER occur again or you will ensure she will not be a part of your marriage or life together.
(Husband would be free to see mother on his own). And if the harassment continues, the law will be involved.
& Follow thru with your statement.
Bullies don’t usually continue when stood up to
Your husband should be sticking up for you in condemning his mom and his ex. Also block them both in your phone. If it kept up then file a protection order.
Why is ex wife getting drunk with MIL???
WhTs most important here is what’s HE gonna do?
Talk to your husband about it and see where he is. Then you put up boundaries with the MIL. If she thinks so poorly of you to be that disrespectful you don’t allow her close. She’s just as toxic.