I’m 29 been work my bf 3 years my last relationship waited 6 years for a ring and 3 years engaged. Never got married. We split up. Now waiting on a ring again
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If its really important to you hun sit and have a conversation open n honest xx
Wow I can’t believe what I’ve just read…told your horses misses! Your both very young who says that if you get married now two years down the line you break up…marriage isn’t always a fairy tale.have you even gave it a thought that he’s not even ready to get married yet…keep pushing it and he’s likely to run…next question can you both afford to get married? You both work? Sometimes your better off as you are because sometimes marriage can damage what you have together if one or the other is pushed when not ready…stop being selfish and be greatful for what you have until he is ready.
You should work on being happy with it without him. Maybe focus on your career, saving for and buying a house, and getting ready to be married and support children.
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I never understood why marriage matters so much to most women. Don’t try to explain it because I “get it” but I just can’t relate. It’s kinda silly honestly. Marriage doesn’t mean he is gonna be faithful or even be with you forever. Also, why is signing a love contract so romantic? It’s literally just a marriage and it’s ONLY recognized here in America. Your marriage means nothing in Mexico I promise
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Ever hear the expression " why buy the cow when you are already getting the milk and meat for free “” well sweetheart he don’t need to marry you because you already give him the milk and meat for free…he’s got a good thing going without the actual legal commitment that would protect you if you ever spilt up or if he died …another words if you two spilt he can basically take everything with him or if he died right now his parents/ siblings could take everything and legally there’s nothing you can do about it
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It’s real simple. Because he doesn’t want to. Why do people try to make someone else ready for that huge commitment, just bc they are? I was pressured to get married. It sucks!
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You’re 24!!! He’s right. That’s young. Save up then when the time is right he will propose
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I saw a thing that said dont let your boyfriend keep you from your husband. My thoughts are if he wanted to he would. Me and my husband have also been together since we were 16/17. Had our first child at 18,married then our second at 19. And still together at 31/32
Mid 20s is still young. 
I know way more at 27 than I did at 25. Why do you want to pressure him into something he’s told you over and over again that he isn’t ready for?
Sit down for a second…forget about the ring, proposal, and marriage for a second.
*How does he treat you?
*How does he act in and about the relationship right now?
*What do you feel is gained by officially getting married that you don’t already have other than the title?
*Why is it so important to you to get married?
*Why are his reservations important to him?
A marriage isn’t the guarantee of commitment it used to be.
You don’t have to be married to be fully committed and just because you get married doesn’t mean you are fully committed.
I don’t necessarily think you’re wrong for wanting to get married, but depending on your relationship as it is he may not be wrong for not wanting to get married.
The best thing you can do here is be honest with yourself and then have an open and honest conversation with him where you listen as much as you talk.
Then decide together how to proceed.
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Same position but I’m 47 so I can’t really speak.
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My brother has been with his girlfriend 10 years and they haven’t gotten married he hasn’t purposed. To some men it’s just a peice of paper
If you been together that long you are like a wife any ways
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My husband and I met Jan 2010 and were engaged on our 6 month anniversary and married 6 months later. He surprised me with an anniversary party and vow renewal last summer. He’ll do it if he wants too. I’m 34 my husband is 40. My stepson met his fiance when he was 16 she was 23-24. They have a 3 year old daughter and will be getting married in September this year. He gave her a promise ring at 1 year and in December 2020 he proposed. So it’s been almost 5 years for them. June will be 5 years. He turned 21 in April. There daughter was born March 2019. He actually left her during her pregnancy and came back when our granddaughter was born. He just wasn’t ready, he wanted his space and she was abusive towards him because she was off her meds during the pregnancy.
Propose to him. If he says no you have your answer, move on.
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Been with my guy 12 years we raised our kids together meshed family call each other hubby and wifey and play the parts. He finally put a ring on it last year. If it is something you want and it’s a deal breaker for you then express that. You could propose to him or just let him know that marriage is something you want and you’ve already given him half your life either his commits or you walk but be prepared to walk because men don’t see marriage like they used to
I’d have a serious talk with him and tell that you want to marry him and it’s important to you to get married. He needs a good reason not just bs about being too young, you are not too young and you’ve given him 8 years already so why is he hesitating?
Do you know his stance on this topic? I kind of had the same issue with my now husband. We had the same sort of set up too. We had been dating since we were 15… I wanted to get married after 20… he wasn’t ready. I did long distance for 5 years, him in PR and me in FL. It took a lot of digging to figure out what his issue with marriage was and he just wasn’t ready no real rhyme or reason behind it other than it wasn’t a priority for him and I in fact had to do the “shit or get off the pot” move when were 21. We broke up for 4 months, we stayed in contact with each other the entire time and I started seeing someone else but I was super open and honest with him the entire time and I guess the realization of me actually moving on made him want to move back to FL… He proposed to me 6 months later actually. I did what was necessary for my situation but to me I didn’t want to waste more of my youth waiting for something that wasn’t going to potentially happen. If you’re at your limit maybe take the break and see where that lands you both 
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I’m 27. Been with my bf 11 years. No proposal. We are still young. What’s the rush?
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I married at 22 and it was the dumbest thing I’ve ever done in my life. There’s truly no rush and I wish I had never gotten married. Been there, done that, bought the 11k t-shirt lol. Marriage makes such a simple breakup so freaking complicated imo but that’s just my two cents
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I was w my so for 24yrs and never married loved him forever
We call this being the placeholder. Reevaluate
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Y’all are stupid who wants to get married anyways
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Don’t have to be married to someone to spend the rest of your life loving them
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Decide what is important to you and see if it is important to him. You don’t need a fancy party, you don’t have to spend tens of thousands of dollars, you can have a simple ceremony with a small reception if being married is a priority to you both. There needs to be discussions on how he feels about marriage and if it is a priority to him or something he sees in your future and go from there. We both wanted to be married and we were young, 18 and 20, had a very simple ceremony and reception at my parents house, cost less than a thousand dollars, we just celebrated our 40th anniversary.
Sorry to say it, but he doesn’t want to marry you.
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He is getting his needs met. He has no reason to change.
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Why on earth do women still believe marriage is a degree, and since y’all treat it as such, how long did you wait to get an actual degree? Its the 21st century stop chasing a ring, probably not even wife material
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One, don’t force anyone to do what you want. He may love you, but marriage is not in the list of priorities. He isn’t ready to give you this honor and your place in society. In 8 years he hasn’t wanted to honor you, I don’t think it’s gonna change. Don’t guilt him, don’t force him. He will resent you. However, you are 24. You are still quite young. I’m a wife and it ain’t all that, trust me. Make sure you want to be married for the right reasons and with the correct person. A person that loves you will value, and respect you. It shouldn’t have to be a hassle, negotiation, convincing, persuasion or coercing anyone to love you and respect you. In my experience, those things can’t be forced, those matters are like farts and if you force them they are probably 
. I know that you may love him but you have to be mature, and pragmatic. You have to be ready to leave if this is not the status you want to have. If someone can’t appreciate your presence then they will embrace your absence. Do so with dignity and grace. No resentment. A man knows if he wants to marry someone, I’ve seen dudes stay as a mere boyfriend for years and never marry the woman of his youth to marry a cunt he just met. On the same token, maybe you gotta thank the gods that he isn’t marrying you, although you may not see it that way right now. Maybe the Universe is doing you a favor because it may have much better things planned for you. But you can’t grab on to this while your hands are full holding on to the past. Let go. Suffocate him with freedom. And allow yourself to be open to receive from the universe. I wouldn’t rush into marriage although 8 years are 8 years. Sometimes people need breaks to appreciate what they had.
Move on. Guys have a year tops otherwise they don’t wanna marry you
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He’s right, that’s young. I know people who were together a decade before they got engaged and married. Contrary to popular belief, you don’t have to be engaged within a couple of years to be happy or get married. Considering y’all’s age, he’s probably not ready yet and I get that. Don’t rush it.
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Took mine 12 years before he asked … 12 years 2 kids and a house later lmao
Because he doesn’t want to. I’d ask him.
If you stay with him, have your own savings account and make provisions so IF he leaves you, you can provide for yourself.
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I married at 18. We have been together for 12 years now. We definitely have our ups and downs with being married that young. But I’d ask him why. Hopefully you guys end up getting married and he’s not just feeling a void.
Been with mines 7 years I’m not expecting to get married no more not in America
If he loves you, stfu. A ring doesn’t reflect his feelings
Ask him why. Then decide based on his reasons. Say you’re fed up hearing excuses based on age. If it’s important to you then it will always be in the way.
He’s not gonna marry you honey. He’s getting his needs met so why would he?
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Are u living together? It seems that once you move in together the guy is in no rush and is fine with the status quo. That’s fine as long as you are too. You can give him an ultimatum- I want to be married by such and such a date, but be ready to follow through. Tell him how you feel.
11 years 2 kids and he just asked last year but we haven’t planned anything yet. 
neither of us are really pushing it. Will probably just go to court house eventually. Have you told him how you feel?
Maybe you should take the time to figure out why you’re so obsessed with demanding that dynamic out of this specific man. You might be better off picking someone who shares your life and relationship goals. It isn’t reasonable to sit around waiting for someone else to meet your standards. He isn’t obligated to meet them anyway.
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He gave you his reasons respect them, don’t like them? Leave?
Marriage is scary in a way, you don’t need to be married to prove you’re in love.
You’re only 24, been together forever. Divorce is the reason is scary
Why don’t you get on your knee and ask him yourself if he’ll marry you. It doesn’t have to be the man that asks for a hand in marriage.
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maybe because he doesn’t want to. why haven’t you proposed?
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Mine didnt propose until year 10 when I was 30. No complaints at all. I am happy with our time together married or not. 
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Marriage isn’t for everyone, nor should a piece of paper make a couple. Divorce can be expensive so making wise decisions on marriage is smart imo.
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I was married way young n after 23 years of marriage WAIT!!! People shift things yall like now you won’t anymore. Don’t rush cause I think he is on to something
24 is young. Breathe. You have time.
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He probably does not want to mess things up. Most marriages do not last. I wouldn’t push it. It’s only a piece of paper. No one should get married until close to 30 years old. You have to learn to grow together. You change into different people. People treat each other better when dating. For the better. If you feel like it’s a deal breaker then discuss it and make a decision.
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If getting married means more to you than being with him, leave. If not count your blessings and enjoy each other’s company. How about having a celebration of your years together? Essentially do what you need to make yourself happy if you are not and celebrate what does make you happy.
You guys are so young.
What if you leave and wish you could just go back but can’t it’s just a ring 
24 is still young, you’re both still growing. And marriage isn’t fir everyone, why so desperate for a ring? If you’re happy why does something need to change? Why does that bit of paper matter more than your healthy relationship lol
Start dating others!
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Communicate with him, I was with my husband 9 years until we got married (engaged at 8 years). I made it a requirement, he proposed a year later!
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Girl mid 20’s is still extremely young, you say that as if it’s comparable to mid 40’s lol, on a different note tho, & sorry it’s early I’m just going to be blunt, but he doesn’t want to marry you & my guess would be he’s aware he’s young and hasn’t explored the world of love enough at all yet, i do think you should start thinking about moving on before you do waste more time, I’m 25 & my boyfriend is 21, I feel like I’m entering an important adult stage in my life & he’s just entering his 20’s which should be all about fun, the relationship is great, but I want to be pregnant by 30 & ALWAYS have, he doesn’t think he’s going to be very interested in kids & says definitely only 1 if any, I’m fine with 1 and all, but he’s not even sure kids is something he wants in his life, & he’s 21 & has all the time to change that opinion & grow, but I can’t be nearing 27 & him think he still doesn’t want kids, I can’t waste my time past a certain point and will end up leaving if that’s what happens
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I think it is time for you to look in the mirror and have a heart to heart with yourself. You need to see if you are happy were your relationship is and if you can be happy it being the status for the rest of your life. Do you see yourself with him in old age. If your answer is no then move on. If it is yes then keep going
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We were together 8.5 years before he asked. It’ll happen when it’s supposed to especially if you got together so young
Honey as my mom would say if he’s getting the milk for free why buy the cow 
sorry but really think , and again some people just don’t want to be married,and that’s okay too if you’re both happy that way. But girl get some $$$$$ to put away for a rainy day 
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My husband and I were together for 8.5 years before he asked. It drove me nuts but now we have been married for almost 5 years and have an almost 4 year old and 1 year old.
If this is what you really want then I would give him one more year. If at the end of the year he still doesn’t want to get married then it’s time to move on. This way you can heal and get settled before you meet the next person. It’s not an ultimatum it’s simply information.
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l get paid over $187 per hour working from home. l never thought I’d be able to do it but my buddy makes over $18918 a month doing this and she convinced me to try. The possibility with this is endless.
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Have a serious conversation with him about wanting to get married and how you feel. Guys don’t pick up on feelings the way we do. We have to be very forward and say how we feel and why. My husband and I were together for 10 years before we got married but we both knew we wanted to get married at some point and my husband knew that getting married was important to me.
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I’ll give you the same advice that I give everyone when they start fretting about marriage.
What does marriage give you that you currently don’t have? A piece of paper?
I’m assuming you live together (because who can afford to live on their own anymore 
)? If you’re worried about future purchases together (house, car, etc.), you can put both your names on the titles.
Health insurance? Most accept domestic partnerships.
& if you’re worried about having kids, it doesn’t really change anything by being married. 
Society, family, friends, etc. can pressure you into feeling like marriage is the only way. But it’s just a piece of paper, that you have to pay for!
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My hubby and I were together a whole lifetime before we got legally married 
(20 years) Been legally married for years now and nothing has changed 
Don’t rush life 
Some people have a plan in their head my ex husband had told me he planned to and we had our wedding half planned out before he actually did he had said he wanted to give his out of country family 2 years notice to be able to save and come if they wanted and that time frame was coming up since we chose our date … so I started worrying it wasn’t going to happen. I Asked he told me be patient and it ended up being a very romantic thing and that’s what he wanted… maybe? Maybe he doesn’t put the same value on marriage as you…?
A lot of men want to be financially stable w a good career before starting a family so they know they can provide. I’d talk about his goals n where he wants to be in a couple more years n if he sees marriage down the road or not.
Because. He. Doesn’t. Want. To
And why would he? He has all the benefits of marriage without the commitment already.
If you love him and he loves you, stay and wait!! I wish I had, it’s so hard to see when you’re in that phase of life but trust all of these people saying, we’ve lived it. We know what we’re saying lol enjoy the alone time you have as a couple, enjoy the freedom as an alone couple. Especially if you plan to have kids
Let me tell you something if you’re happy be happy marriage won’t change anything or make it better. However if you’re not on the same page about your future together then maybe it’s time to rethink the relationship and there is nothing wrong with walking away if it isn’t what you want
Brother is drinking the milk but doesn’t want to buy the cow. Sis, clearly you both don’t want the same thing. Don’t waste your fertile years on a temporary situation. You do love him, and there is honor in that. But don’t let the fear of an unknown future keep you in a situation that is not meant for you. By staying with a man that was not meant for you, you are keeping your real man waiting, plus you are keeping a man meant for a woman who does not want to be married. Ignore everything I said above because you and I both, know you are already thinking of starting to pack. You came to hear, to the community of women for our opinion and permission to your present situation. We are granting your request. We give you permission to start finding a different situation for yourself. One that brings you joy, peace, and contentment. Yes, you will feel some pain, yes you will miss him. for sure and the routines you had together …(don’t take too long to grieve. He wasn’t yours anyway). We have also decided you should take some time for yourself to reflect on why you stayed in an unhappy situation for so long and celebrate how you got narrowly got away from a potentially more painful situation. Imagine what kind of husband he would be if he married you just so you can stfu and feel better about the present situation? We wish you all the best and don’t forget to reach out to the people who love you or the ones you have to pay for support if you need it.
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Talk to him. Is marriage something he wants? Is it something he wants with you?
Not the easiest conversation to have, but you need to.
Personally, it sounds like he does not want to get married - or else he would have done it by now.
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Weddings are expensive!! Like wildly so. Maybe he doesn’t want to ask until he knows he can follow through I had a guy friend I grew up with ask me once how to handle his gf of 5 years hinting at wanting to get married. He wanted to but they were barely getting by. Living paycheck to paycheck and he knew he couldn’t afford a wedding, or a ring. He was worried about disappointing her with a cheap ring with a small stone and a long engagement since it would take years to save up.
I helped him get an awesome ring cheap at a jewelry auction and told him she seemed like the type of person who’d understand the long engagement. So he went for it and they are 6 years and 1 child later still engaged
Could this be your story? Is it possible finances are what’s holding him back? Does the marriage really matter if you’re living as a married couple already?
I was with my man for 7 years before he proposed and for my fiancé it was a timing thing. You guys are technically viewed as common law partners already. Maybe he just isn’t ready yet seeing as you guys are in your 20s he is correct you two are still young. Being married young is always so glamorous but he probably wants to make sure you are financially stable for the ring and wedding planning as weddings aren’t cheap. 
First: He is right, you’re still young and there is no reason to rush into a LIFETIME COMMITMENT! Sure you will be 25 this year and another 5 years…you will be 30 and will have grown probably into a whole new person. A man choosing to wait for marriage until he is actually ready doesn’t mean he doesn’t consider you wife material. It means he is not ready!! Now if you had been together for 15 years and he still hasn’t bothered then yes you aren’t the type of women he wants to marry because 15 years is plenty of time for both parties to have developed into the people they will stay. I am an entirely different person at 33 than I was at 25…and my wants have changed drastically due to my life experiences. If you love him, truly love him…you will be willing to wait for him to be ready.
Maybe he doesn’t want to get married. Have a serious talk with him about it. If you really want to be married and he doesn’t then you have to decide if you will stay and not get married or leave to find someone else who will.
Don’t force it… if you’re happy, just be happy. You don’t need a ring and paper to prove love for eachother…
Just let it go… and “time wasted”?? Time is never wasted, just life lessons being learned 
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Follow your gut! Not your heart!
If u try to rush him into something he isn’t ready for there will most likely be resentment. I’m 37 I’ve been with my fiance 8 years and 2 proposals we still aren’t married, we both go back and forth on if marriage is even something we’re interested in. We’re happy why do we need the legalities to tell us we love each other, but that’s us. 25 is young, u haven’t really experienced life without each other maybe that’s something that crosses his mind and he may be curious about but doesn’t know how to go about talking about it without hurting u. It could just be marriage isn’t something important to him bc he feels like us and doesn’t need the paper to tell him how much he loves u. It really comes down to u 2 communicating ur actual feelings rather then like him just giving the bare reason that doesn’t make sense to u.
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I was with my ex 7 years - nothing- always had some excuse - he knew I ultimately wanted marriage when I met him. It wasn’t a surprise by any means. He ended up leaving me for another girl (not over that). It was never meant to be. So glad too, now I’m married with 2 kids. Life has a funny way of working out 
When you choose someone to grow together with youve gotta be sure youre growing in the same direction… Maybe this is a sign yall want different things in life. And i say make the leap to see what falls into.place you didnt know you needed dude
Me and my husband didn’t get engaged until we were together for 11 years and got married on our 13th anniversary. But marriage isn’t for everyone either. It costs big money to plan a wedding and it doesn’t change a thing. It’s literally just a piece of paper I was soo hyped to get married as well, but I don’t know why now haha nothing against my husband! It’s just it didn’t change anything. I still love him just as much as I did before we got married and I know he loves me the same as well. The only thing that changed was my last name. And I could’ve changed it without getting married
He could be worried marriage would wreck what a good thing you have right now. Enjoy your youth, and the pretty. It doesn’t last forever. He wants to be sure, It’s a big, and often a lifelong commitment. sometimes I think that younger men think that they haven’t really done anything in life yet, he may be leaving the doors open to have some space tu grow into his life. Marriage can feel like a great big ball and chain when one doesn’t want it.
It’s past time. If marriage is important to you move on. He knows by now if he plans to marry you or not.
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It’s 2022. Propose to him. Or better yet, being adults, have an adult conversation and make a decision together.
Your still young my dear. Live a little more.
If your happy now just focus on being happy where you guys are.
I’ve been engaged for 4 years now, together for 6. Of course the idea of marriage sounds nice, but we both rather wait until we can completely afford a wedding we both want, and of course the amazing honeymoon 
My fiancé was also really kind of difficult to talk to about it until finally he just brought it up himself, and it is very important to him to make the day and moon special. We don’t want to be in debt for “making it official.” Rather get our home going to ensure our family is well before we spend money on the paper and trip.
You’ve obviously never been married before.
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If you’re in a hurry to get married then find someone else, don’t rush a man into getting married cuz shit never ends well! YAL ARE STILL YOUNG…Have a long ass talk with the guy! It’s good to know who you’re REEEEAAAALLLYYYY dating before you jump the broom! But overall, if you’re happy then be happy, and tell everyone else mind their damn business!!
If you love each other,what’s the difference a little piece of paper going to make,it’s what’s in the heart that counts
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Do you live together?
Follow your gut! Not your heart!
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I don’t think giving him an ultimatum will make him pop the question. Why don’t you live a little and enjoy life. Stop trying to rush things, you’re young! When I hit 30 I can’t even manage to stay awake late at night anymore lol
Me and my wife think it was a stupid decision now the IRS sees us as one income and we get fucked. Do you have love? Do you have support? When you need to talk does he listen? Does he put you first before himself? Then don’t get married, anything you can do married you can do unmarried. If you’re worried about if one of you passes away? Write your wills young to make sure the other is protected. Society tells us we need to do this and that by this age we need kids before 30 or we are old parents. Fuck that shit, ask him, sit down and talk to him.
Dont worry about getting married geez. You are legally married now as it is. Dont start pushing or you will push him right out the door. If you were to get married and it does not work out divorce is expensive.Be happy and enjoy your life if yall are not fighting at each others throat. He does not cheat on you or beat on you you have got it good.
Why buy the cow when you’re already getting the milk for free?
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nope! go find you and then your love will find you as well!
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same boat, 8 yrs and no ring no nothing but he has said in the past he wasnt ready for marriage as he got screwed royally in the past. for me i want to get married and have that commitment and if he doesnt then i may walk away because Im way older than you and was previously married and i want that. you need to talk to him about it and make sure he wants what you do. dont waste more years if he doesnt
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