I have dreams of going to medical school, should I have a baby with my boyfriend?

Kim Ladobruk you need to see this one and read the comments :rofl::heart:

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Don’t do;do it. Focus on;your studies first. Kid’s are;a big responsibility. One of;my cousins became pregnant before studying for a pharmacy assistant&that forced;her to neglect her baby girl back then that the grand parents help raised. Mommy&daughter have;a difficult relationship. So I’m;encouraging you to find out about birth control;the relationship is to young/new for a baby. Love takes;time to grow&please make sure this is your future husband. Stay strong.

Don’t let him pressure you, don’t be afraid to say no, don’t be afraid to live your dreams, if he is the right one he will still be there no matter what YOU decide. The choice is yours and if you have to ask strangers on fb you are not ready to make that decision yourself.

Don’t have any kids, go follow your dreams men like to talk a lot of game and when it comes down to it they back out and change completely. The possibility of you guys not working out is always there. Believe me follow your dreams and become a mother later just incase you guys break up you have a career that will support you and any child you want to have later on in life

Honey I would be offended that he made the decision for me to have his child without my knowledge before even considering anything else… if the guy is trying to move this quickly its because he knows if he doesn’t lock you down somehow sometime soon, you’ll see why you shouldn’t. Seriously protect yourself. He should be trying to propose, not get you pregnant, he should be planning a vacation, not trying to ruin your future.

I might be the only guy to say this but when even a guy says the same thing as all the ladies you know it’s the way to go (adds more validity to what is being said). Wait on kids, yeah go to school but don’t forget about work. You can go to school but if you don’t have relevant experience then yeah going to school isn’t gonna matter. Just because you got the education doesn’t mean you’ll get the job. You’ll have internships I’m sure which will be nice for you to get experience that way. Often times it’s the people that focused more on work rather than school that end up with the best positions. As long as you don’t forget about work and you do school then yeah you’ll do fine then after you’ve done all that you can have kids. Be blessed and college is a fun time for sure, you’ll have fun.

First I have to say this wait you only been with for couple months wait untill u least living togsther and no each other better I think too soon and you should really think long in hard about career in the medical field and a baby nmbaby needs mommy 24 7 if your gona breast feed you be out of work and or school for while after having the baby you need take leave so I think you should talk more logically with your man say maybe let’s wait about 1 year before having kids that you have your man untill you have give your life to a child no time for friends not alone school and work and baby I say nope too soon but you have figure out what is best for u and him too this personal choice

I’m gonna tell you GO TO SCHOOL!!! GET ON SOME KIND OF BIRTH CONTROL!!! This is a brand new relationship n for him to be telling you not to take plain b… lol no you have goals n you better stick to them ! Cos there are some ladies out here that had kids n had goals n its taking them longer to reach their goals cos they have kids. You do it for you but for the ladies who haven’t reached their own goals yet. If he loves you he should support your choice! Period nothing else! Go to medical school be the best damn Dr cos lord knows the world needs more of them. Never ever let a man second guess what path to take in life!!!

I did this accidently… ( got pregnant with this guy) way too soon… and well… I now have a three year old who hasn’t seen her donor since the day we left when she was one. Be careful!

2 months and he’s already trying to get you pregnant without even discussing it with you first?! Um, no thank you. I don’t give a damn how HE feels about you, it’s how you feel!! You’re still young finish your goal first and see where yall are in the relationship then.

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Is someone putting these stupid questions together to fk with my mental?

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This reads like a love sick 16 year old wrote it. I mean this nicely, please grow up a little before you allow any man to impregnate you, especially without actual commitment. Good luck

Everything is always perfect the first few months. Check back in 2 years.

2 months ??? Give him at least a year before thinking about kids you don’t even know this man :weary::weary:

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School first then baby

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Based off this post I’m going to say nooooooooooo

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Don’t do it. Wait till that dream of becoming a doctor comes true

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Please excuse me… but i find this question a little to childish. I mean the one asking was 27 years old already and the question was like thoughts of a 15 or 16 years old.

After 2 months?!? He’ll no!! Live with him for 2 years and see what kind of person he really is. Then decide If he is the type of man u want to Raise a Child with. Having a baby is a lot different than Raising a Child. Ur talking about creating a life u have to take care of for the rest of ur life. U want to do that after only 2 months??

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I’d wait longer than 2 months before you have a child with someone, there’s a lot you need to get to know about each other 1st. That’s way to soon, you still have time for kids.

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Definitely need to wait longer than 2 months. You barely know him and people change after having a baby and it’s not always a good change. Wait and see how things go with him for at least a year or 2.

Follow your dreams do not get pregnant,that would be a big mistake you would regret

Huge red flag, when a man plans to have a baby with you & you aren’t even aware of it! :woman_facepalming:t2: Those are decisions that people make together, not something a man, who btw will leave you with all responsibilities if you break up, decides on his own much less two months into a relationship. Nope nope nope :running_woman::dash: :no_good_woman:t2:

You’d be nuts to give up medical school to have a baby with a guy you just met!
Finish school and then if he is still around, then re-evaluate the situation. If you have a child now, you have no guarantees he will stick around and then you will have to choose between a child and school because it will be hard to raise a baby with medical school and the long hours you have to put into both. Don’t make a child suffer that.
If you are even thinking like this, are you even smart enough for medical school??? You going to jump the gun when taking care of patients too? Maybe misdiagnose the situations and issues without proper logic, because thats exactly what you are doing here…

Love bombing from a narcissist

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You’re 27 and a premed student and you need us to tell you how moronic this sounds??? Please dont become a doctor and give this kind of advice to your young female patients.

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Please be realistic!!

I recommend getting on birth control

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Take it from this soul 65 year-old girl. Girl go to school…

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get omn birth control and go to school he says all these things nwo until a child comes in to this world ,men do change once a child i shere,seen it happen

You really need to slow down! That’s just lust and beginning stages like chill out! Damn I hope he didn’t give you any diseases, he is seriously lovebombing you too soon and it’s coming off as a red flag do not let that guy get you pregnant so soon it feels good but you hardly really know him, chill out n stop letting him cum in you. You seem really gullible

Yes you are being dumb…and we don’t need to explain why we think you are being dumb lol

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It’s nice to be in love but be realistic and think of yourself first finish your schooling a baby is a huge responsibility and from what I hear med school isn’t no joke it’s hard too so why put so much on your plate? Definitely think your biting more than you can chew finish school and get to know him better and then decide give it two three years

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If he won’t get on the same page with you get on birth control to me that’s a sign of disrespect it’s not just his choice. He knows you have a dream yall can wait till your done with school

Stupid post - poor girl

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Hell no…go b a doctor first

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Wait until your married. Seriously being a single mom is hard af. But if you plan on having a kid. Why wouldn’t you want you education first? That way you can provide for your family

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Why would anyone have a planned baby with someone after 2 months?

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Wait until you’re 4 years in a relationship. This advice actually came from a married woman and she said that after 4 years of being together, love will fade.

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School first. And live together for awhile first too. Share a life together and then add a baby to it down the road.

After reading this… I honestly think that you’re not mature enough for a baby and neither is he. Go to school!
Have you really taken into consideration what having a baby means? What it entails? You have been together for only 2 months, barely know each other. Then you’re wanting to go to medical school (which is absolutely amazing)! However medical school means you will barely have any time for each other. Medical school is hard and so consuming. You will spend countless hours in school and at the hospital putting time in. Medical school will probably test your relationship a bit. Then trying to put a pregnancy in the mix… Pregnancy is exhausting. You will be so tired and emotional… Hormonal… Then not getting sleep because you’re doing rounds at the hospital or studying for school. You will never get any rest. Then when the baby comes you can pretty much kiss sleep goodbye. Its almost non existent.
Although having a baby is the most wonderful feeling and thats the moment you find what true love really is… I think its a little selfish to bring a baby into the world and then not have time for said baby.
Date him… Have fun with him… Get to know him and vise versa. Go to school. Get established. Get your life together for the sake of your future baby.

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If you want to be a doctor, use birth control. If you let this man get you pregnant, and it costs you your dream, you’ll resent the child for the rest of your life, which would be terrible for the child. Both people should be in agreement about having a child. You’ve been together 2 months and the fact he’s deliberately trying to get you pregnant without your agreement is raising red flags about control issues to me.

I’m seeing red flags :triangular_flag_on_post:

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I would get on birth control and finish med school. Get your degree and then u can think of having a baby . That will also give the 2 of you plenty time to get to know each properly and see how you are outside of the honeymoon stage. Definitely wait . Don’t get pregnant just to please him. Think of your future.

He’s saying everything you want to hear. Unprotected sex means you both want a child among other things such as std. If you truly want to finish your college degree and become a doctor, then focused on that. If he is truly serious about the relationship, then he will respect you and your goals. As far as his relatives telling you all you want to hear, I’ve been there too. Please be careful. My mom once td me "go to college, get your degree and get a good job so you can support yourself financially. That way, if you do get married and he decides to leave you, and humiliate you by leaving you broke, you’re able to support yourself

Sissy Ann is my granddaughter and all she stated is true. I am so proud of her! But, she worked HARD!
You are not thinking practically. A baby is a wonderful happening but your life is never the same. Having a child isn’t like a sign of going steady! In 2 months he hasn’t even begun to show his true colors. He may be Prince Perfect Charming but, regardless what he tells his aunt, it’ll take a much longer time to see who he really is! Go to school and remain unencumbered by any major responsibilities besides paying your rent and passing your exams with all As. You can stay together through all your schooling and then settle in to married life and parenthood. Hopefully in that order. Quit relying on Plan B and get yourself a reliable birth control method. Having a baby shouldn’t be like a crapshoot.
Good luck! Look out for you…

My brain hurts from reading that post​:thinking::thinking::roll_eyes::face_with_raised_eyebrow:

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Answer to your 1st question, no you shouldn’t have a baby with your boyfriend.
Answer to your 2nd question, yes you are dumb.
I know woman get pregnant accidentally but you’re using the pull out method or letting him finish in you, taking the morning after pill, then asking if he’s trying to get you pregnant :rofl:
Please, if you do become a Dr, don’t give this 'method" out to others.
You’ve known each other for 2months.
Get your head in your books and out of the clouds.
If you’re meant to be together, you’ll make it.

Yes you are dumb, as a almost medical student you know not using protection you can catch things
You are willing to give up everything to make your dreams not true
Grote kans dat die vent je verlaat
Grote kans dat je straks n soa hebt
Grote kans dat je straks je kind verwijt, dat jij niet hebt kunnen studeren
Als hij zo fantastisch is kan hij ook wachten en samen een leven met je op te bouwen
En dat hij zo opkijkt tegen zijn zwager betekent niet dat hij (ook al zegt hij dat wel) precies hetzelfde zal doen voor jou, omdat hij een totaal andere persoon is dan zijn zwager
Je bent verschrikkelijk dom bezig.

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He could change ,he could not . The most important thing right now is you accomplishing your goals. The best thing yous can do for your future baby is being settled and stable ,trust me it’s not easy being a Mom let alone studying and working and being a Mom ,you will probably end up not going to medical school if you have a baby now ,your boyfriend will promise to look after you, then years down the line when you sitting at home and your child’s in school and hubby’s at work or out of the picture ,you’ll be regretting that you didn’t think realistically now.

My ex said the same things to me we dated for 3 years and after having my daughter it got hard having a relationship with someone who says they want a baby with you is so much different than actually having a baby with you. I had to pause my life for the first 12 months of my daughters life. I was and still am constantly asking my family members to watch my daughter so I can work. After having my daughter with a boy who said he wanted a baby with me he vanished our relationship broke and he hasn’t seen his daughter in 7 months hasn’t paid child support in 9 months and now he has a new relationship and goes on all these trips and date nights and super expensive dinners and in the mean time I went back to school so I can set up a life for my daughter and I but yet again I was still asking anyone and everyone I could to watch my kiddo so I could set up our lives. I don’t in any way resent my daughter I love her more than the word itself. But if I could I would have definitely gone to school first and finished that because I went back to beauty school when my daughter was 2 1/2 months old before I moved home after the breakup to finish out school only 6 months later… as a single mom I highly recommend go to school first love this guy first get to know everything, the ups and downs of this man, and then when your done with school if your married or not god with choose your next path. Definitely think about what some of these comments have said and look at what you have in life right now. You have the freedom to go to school long hours of studying long hours of homework, throw a baby in the mix you’ll be struggling with grades struggling with studying for a test. Trust me girl I’ve been there and it’s super hard trying to have 2 life’s in 1! :blush::heart:

You don’t seem mature enough to have a baby and neither does he… seeing some big red flags. :no_mouth:

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After 2 months he wants a baby :triangular_flag_on_post: in six months you will be back on here asking the question “I’m pregnant by him he left me or I’m unhappy, I’m I
stupid for not going to medical school”. He is trying to trap you and all your dreams will go down the drain

I’m almost 50 and have wasted 30 odd years with one “fabulous” relationship or other.
Trust me.
Kids can wait, if he’s meant for you he will support you.
Oh and get yourself on the pill… Pronto
Good luck in med school x

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Definitely hold off on having a baby. It’s a young relationship, men will come and go but your education is to make sure you can take care of yourself. He sounds like a narcissist already. Trying to get you pregnant without discussing it with you is utterly selfish and it is trap to control you. Protection, school. Never, compromise on your education. Love fades quickly.

I was only with my partner for 5 weeks when I fell pregnant with my first, but we deffo was not trying. The pill failed me. Saying that we have now been together 7 years with 3 children and are getting married next year. So the relationship could work but being so close to your dream job I would deffo be waiting until you have succeeded down your career path before a child. X

  1. birth control
  2. Continue with you schooling
  3. Continue your relationship and get to know each other. Make sure y’all have the same future goals. Nothing wrong with not agreeing as long as you don’t hold it against each other. It’s ok not to always agree. You are individuals allowed to have your own opinions.
  4. Enjoy life together. What’s the hurry? Life is fast enough.

I’m 32 years into our marriage and these are things I’ve learned so far.

Best wishes!

Simply answered… You’ve only been with him for 2 months. You’re still young. Get your education first.

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So he was actively trying to get you pregnant before even asking you if you wanted to be pregnant?? :thinking: Honey, you’re asking because you already know the answer.

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U sure your 27 and not 17? :exploding_head:

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Darling u are premed why aren’t u going for family planning and not just telling him? You have to be the rational thinker

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You’re being dumb.
He’s infatuated with your potential. If you get pregnant now though, you’ll never reach that potential. Or you might, just years down the road. Bringing a human in to the world is a ton of responsibility and it’s expensive.
Focus on your schooling first. Land a job next.

If he’s a doctor and knows how hard it will be and can support you financially and afford the nanny that will be needed then go for it. Until then he sounds like a sweet talker, asking his aunt or his momma or anyone what they think is high school stuff a real man doesn’t care what anyone thinks he knows what he wants and can only hope his family sees what he sees. Go to school definitely.

Finish school. The rest will come.

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I am a mother of two, I work a full time job and I am currently in school trying to get my degree. From experience, FINISH SCHOOL FIRST!!! I wouldn’t change my life for anything in this world but it is so much harder to do anything once you have kids.

Please take your time to get to know each other, go yo school an get married live life then have babies :kissing_heart:

Wake up girl! Live your dreams!! There’s plenty of time for a baby. He’s being selfish💯

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You know the answer if you have to ask this here. As a single mom I can tell you that having a baby makes bigger changes in your life than you think . Most things get put on hold at that time. I am also speaking from a nurses standpoint . 33 years now and raising a child is very challenging.

NO and I only had to read the 1st sentence. Go do ur life, do it up!!!

I think he’s dangerous, don’t trust him so soon. He’s trying to trap you. Him saying to wants to treat you like how someone else treats someone? So what does that mean that he REALLY acts like in a relationship? That should scare you, that nice guy he’s saying he wants to be is telling you that that’s not who he is. You may think you both are having fun now and that started quick, but think how quick it will turn the other way when he has you trapped because he got you pregnant. Honestly, sounds like a possible abusive relationship in the near future to me. He sounds like a charmer, and they are manipulative, don’t fall in his trap.

Also don’t do shit backwards. Remember school and being married used to come b4 babies. Don’t do it!

Grow up for god sake
A baby really :woman_facepalming:t3:

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Best choice I made for myself was get qualifications, get job then start family, stuck to my guns and best thing that has ever happened to me, plus if I did become a single parent then I still have a job that I love to support myself and our child (not down grading/bashing anyone or anything for choices or situations that have happened to people) but definitely think of you and your future, if he wants a child with you surely he could wait til you get qualifications x

don’t do it he’s trying to hold you back and is hoping to get you pregnant before you can further your education more.also you’re going to medical school & don’t know how to use birth control? you’re playing Russian roulette what is he doing with his life except for trying to knock you up?

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Secure your bag first

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You can go on contraceptives without him knowing. It’s your body protect yourself. A man will promise you the moon and the stars and then he drops you like a hot potato for someone else and all that he promised you, he will do that for some other lady. Secure the bag for yourself first before you think about a baby. If he leaves you with a baby, your plans of studying medicine you can forget, because then you will have to work for your child.

It’s very earlier for ye to be considering having a baby!:flushed:

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After marriage for 5 years then kids. Be in a solid relationship and have solid foundation for kids.

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Seriously if you need to ask advice on this then maybe you shouldn’t be in medical school

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Him planning on getting you pregnant without discussing or planning with you is a huge red flag especially only 2 months into your relationship. I been in an abusive relationship and I’m telling you to watch out, this guy is controlling and that is only going to get worse. His attempt at trying to get you pregnant is his way of trapping you, once he has you where he wants you he will start to show his true colors, by then it’s too late and you can kiss all your hopes abs dreams goodby. Abusive and controlling people are always very passionate fun lovers in the beginning, they do a lot of things out of “love” and for you that someone who isn’t familiar with these red flags would see it as charming, sweet, protective, etc. Him trying to get you pregnant without any discussion is completely disregarding your goals and choices, it’s very selfish and he is def trying to put you in a position where you lose some control and if you allow it to continue it will only get worse. I honestly feel like you should run, but you’ll stay because you like overwhelming feeling of passionate love and you’ll ignore the red flags even if it’s toxic, I know I been there. Now I’m a single mother, who narrowly escaped an abusive relationship (only because he went to jail) but not before I lost everything I ever worked for, family, friends, self respect and confidence, it took many years to rebuild what this guy stole away from me and was very difficult with a child. It all happens so fast and as soon as they get you pregnant in their mind your locked in for life, game on. Stay safe, I’ll pray for you.

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I wouldn’t judge you or him either way.
The bottom line is, Your body, your choice!
In the meantime, I highly recommend you explore female contraceptive options from a medical professional.

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Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. I have dreams of going to medical school, should I have a baby with my boyfriend? - Mamas Uncut

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Wait, do not do it. Get to know him well. His goals and if he has a job and he is loyal and honest. Do not do stuff impulsively and follow your goals.

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Men will literally tell you anything you want to hear, finish school, live life a little bit, trust me if he gets your pregnant and leaves at some point it’s physically and mentally hard, raising a kid by yourself is hard, split parenting is hard, finding a sitter while you work is hard, everything is hard, plus you haven’t been with this guy for a while, I love my kids but things are so hard sometimes, when people say it takes a village it really does

Go to school first and wait on the kid! I have 2 kids and I’m in school and even though I have all the support in the world it’s still very difficult managing kids and their extra curricular activities, school, the home and work full time on top of all that!

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Noooo don’t do it. Once you have a kid and he leaves you you won’t have the option of school get set up before a kid the baby deserves better

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Wait, finish school first then have your baby. You’ll be able to take care of that little one and yourself better with an education

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You’re old enough to know you’re being very irresponsible with someone you’ve only known for a minute. Please pump the brakes before you be writing in again regretting everything you’re doing now

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Get in birth control. It’s too soon to bring a child into this relationship. Don’t give up your dreams of becoming a Dr. he may mean everything he says but don’t count on it. It’s way too early!

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It’s not only about the possibility of breaking up, what about wanting to get to know each other and have some fun before being weighed down with the stresses that come with parenthood?

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You’re this naive and you think you’re gonna make it through med school?? :joy::joy::joy:

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No. From the rafters…NO.

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You’re still in the “honey moon” stage. Trust me. It doesn’t last forever. I would say definitely do NOT get pregnant right now. Live together first for a long time. Date eachother and really get to know eachother…two months isn’t enough time. Be smart. Go to school and if he sticks it out with you then talk about it. But I wouldn’t jump into all of that so fast.

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Do what you feel is best for you,
My partner and myself fell pregnant with our son only after a few months of being together.
We have now been together for almost 2 years, our son is 9 months old (we also have kids from previous relationships) im 26 and he is 29.
My partner is constantly mentioning marriage to me. And how he won’t spend any less then a certain dollar amount on a ring ect.
Sometimes you just click and it seems to happen all so fast.
Iv been in dead end relationships for 6 years never amounting to anything.
Then the moment I met my partner we just knew that we are going to spend the rest of our lives together and although we did not plan on having a baby together so soon. We wouldn’t change it for the world.

If you have all the support in the world, then let yourself get through the the toughest part of school. Unless you have a family history of estrogen problems or cancer, go for school. Parenting is not an easy task and it can be taxing on many levels. Keep enjoying each other’s company safely at least for a few years.

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First learn about paragraphs. Then medical school. Then make the decision about a baby.

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If he loves you as much as he says he does,… he will wait for you to finish med school.
And if your going to be together forever, whats the rush ?

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Girl!!! No no no!!! You go after your dreams!!!’ Trust me I always wanted to be a nurse and guess what? I’m 50 and now it’s too late due to medical reasons! There is plenty of time to have a baby and trust me you haven’t gotten to know all of him in that short amount of time!

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Yeah I was told the same thing, stupidly believed the guy, now I’m a single mom. Unless y’all are married, you shouldn’t even be thinking about having a baby right now. I love my children more than anything but I desperately wish I would have waited to get my life on track first. Get on bc or tell him to use condoms. Otherwise I’d stop being sexually active all together. See how long he stays after that. Go to school. Get that degree. If y’all are still together at that point then try for a baby.

Yes, you are being dumb! Get on birth control & stop being irresponsible. You’ll be in school for ten more years to be a doctor. There is time for children later. 2 months is nothing.

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